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what are they?
dogs and your mother.
that's a very short list, isn't it?
yes...
but you were quite insistent...
what was i?
that an exception be made.
no, no, no, because forget the dog rule, because this pug is amazing.
watch this.
abergard, go.
*barks* do you not hear that?
that's puttin' on the ritz, man.
i'm always insistent, woodhouse.
yes, sir.
but i'm not to be trusted, am i?
no, sir.
stop. shut up.
i have to go.
but if i find one single dog hair when i get back...
i'll rub sand in your dead little eyes.
very good, sir.
i also need you to go buy sand.
yes, sir.
i don't know if they grade it but... coarse.
one entire whole week we've been calling you.
highly unprofessional.
really? because i find your sweatiness unprofessional.
so we have something in common.
besides the fact that now both of our shirts reek of curry.
and when will you settle your account?
when will you buy some dress shields?
this is not a dress.
are you serious? that's not a dress?
oh, god, with the curry again.
this shirt smells like indira gandhi's thong.
hey, you wanna smell something?
swear to god, mr. archer...
i have h.r. on speed dial.
shut up.
hey, krieger, you gotta smell this.
krieger? huh.
you geeks wanna smell something?
archer, get the hell out.
what is it with you people?
try to include people in your life and then you... lana.
hey. hey, what does this smell like?
like the dysfunctional asshole i broke up with six months ago.
oh, my god.
you're amazing.
you are amazing, sweet stuff.
wanna do it again and put on some interracial porn?
god, it's like my brain's that tree, and you're those little cookie elves.
*phone rings* just a second.
no, baby, don't answer that.
i have to.
sorry, it's mother.
mother, hey. just a second.
i cannot believe you.
no, turn it on.
i can do both.
what?
so don't speak to me, ever.
and while you're not ever speaking to me, jump up your own ass and die.
oh, rea... after all that h.r. mediation.
really?
yup.
after all the hard work pam did.
is that archer?
goddamn it.
archer, hey. go away.
about your operations account... not...
cyril, not now.
yes, now.
not a good time.
you've got serious discrepancies... in your account.
no, cyril.
i'm sure you wouldn't use operational funds for personal expenses.
come on, 22 black.
twenty-two black. twenty-two.
black. ass. son of a bitch.
heh.
not you, giant african man.
i'm sorry.
can i offer you a drink?
how about this expensive prostitute?
that is a very serious implication, cyril.
well, so is embezzlement.
yeah?
well, so is the fact that you, some crazy-how, are screwing my ex.
archer, please. that's private.
not calm enough?
you all know about cyril and lana, right? of course, because if pam knows, then everybody knows... because of pam's huge mouth.
right, pam?
h.r. mediations are supposed to be confidential, pam, you manatee.
and as for you, cyril, good day, sir.
archer.
hey, wait.
what about your account?
oh, i get it.
classic misdirection.