not everyone can help, despite desperately wanting to.  
not everyone is physically or psychologically capable of providing grandma's treatment.  
not everyone is financially positioned to provide grandmother's treatment.
here's the thing...i'm willing to pay for and participate in a health care program for everyone, including YOUR grandmother.  that means in the event that YOU are not able to provide it, grandma will still get the treatment she needs.  
as to that smarmy 'shame on you'...esadmofo.