You nailed it.
But the macho crowd doesn't understand that.
It's easy for the armchair warriors to call Kim deranged and pretend all Trump has to do is speak and the world will tremble, but it's not nearly that easy.
Kim is behaving very rationally, by dictators' standards. He looks around the world and he sees numerous dictators gone. So, he's learned what he thinks is the right lesson: If he wants to survive and maintain the family dynasty, ICBMs and nukes are the path forward.
And for Trump to think China will make North Korea go away? China has its own self-interests (a concept Americans don't understand). One Chinese concern is a relatively stable North Korea, to act as a buffer between China and South Korea and to prevent millions of North Koreans from flooding China. China has suggested a demilitarized Korean peninsula with international guarantees of non-interference with either North Korea's or South Korea's internal politics. That's a start.
But it doesn't fit Trump's ego.