LW1, another dumb response from Amy: "She's young and testing you."  WRONG. She is NOT "testing" anyone. This is her dynamic with the mother and has nothing to do with testing. I'm so fed up when advice columnists, psychologists, etc., say that kids who behave this way are "testing the boundaries." Baloney. We can argue all day just what makes this girl behave this way, but one thing's for sure: It isn't because she's using her mother as a guinea pig. Enough of this "testing" nonsense. In life, there is cause and effect. The mother conveniently leaves out a possible cause. For all we know, Mama has been instrumental in driving away every single boyfriend the daughter has ever had. For all we know, Mama used to beat her when she was young or constantly denigrate her--and maybe she's finally getting hers.