I have been married over 40 years. I can't claim to have a definative answer. But I think the process includes the following steps are:
1) Listening for problems
2) Caring/owning the problem
3) Helping to solve the problem
4) Admitting you are wrong when you are wrong.
5) Cooperating with any solution that is mutually acceptable.
6) Show some progress in solving the problem.
7) Give your partner praise for progress.
8) Instill an attitude with humour, cooperation, and state of happiness.
9) When solved celebrate jointly.
10) Go back to #1.
(It took me a long time to figure this out)