The telephone's a waste of time, money, life, liberty and property. "Keep and Bear" an old term discussing ineffective policing, judging, politicking, and inbreeding. It's been the same for thousands of years, ever try the telegraph line? 

Christ Almighty, how many centuries has it taken to learn how to communicate?

Then said he unto them, But now, he that hath a purse, let him take it, and likewise his scrip: and he that hath no sword, let him sell his garment, and buy one.