I total agree with you on guys have to be held responsible. It should be drilled into guys. If you want to play you will PAY. I think you are a person that a hand up is for. I am all for a helping hand up. But for those just looking for a life time hand out. It is time to grow up and take responsibility for one's self.
My sister found her self divorced with two children. Thru government aid she got a ged and became a mechanical draft person. helping Hands up, not hand outs.  Will make a child life better.