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Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Looking Back on the Life of Barack Obama

Looking Back on the Life of Barack Obama




Though he lived a very public life, few could agree on even the basic facts of his life. For a man who spent most of his life in front of the camera, his death leaves us with few answers about who Barack Obama (Holo-Link) really was. Obama only added to the uncertainty swirling around him by using multiple names,  multiple birthplaces and even passports.



Yet to many Barack Obama represents a nostalgic time in history; the last years when such diverse nations as the Confederate States of California (Holo-Link), the Republic of New Hampshire, the People's Republic of Minnesota, the Empire of Texas, El Reino de Aztlan and the Arch-Duchy of Upper New York were all part of one single nation that stretched from ocean to ocean.

His Life

Born in a hospital in some still undetermined part of the world, Barack learned to use multiple names and identities at an early age. Traveling from country to country, the young Obama or Soetoro, would quickly become adept at blending into any culture. This skill would prove crucial in his political career, allowing him to invent new identities and win the trust of his audience. If there is one thing his biographers agree on, it's that he had a genuine gift for sensing what his audience wanted to hear. Unfortunately like most con artists, he lacked the same ability for long term financial planning, that he did for short term schemes to extract money from a gullible American public.


This conflicted legacy helps explain Barack Obama's popularity, even after his corruption and abuses of power destroyed the  government, ending the era of the United States for good-- he was ranked 4th on the prestigious Dow Jones' "Most Likable Celebrities in North America in 2019" index (Holo-Link).



His popularity afterward enabled Obama to begin several successful careers in the entertainment industry, including a long-running stint on the soap opera General Catastrope, his own line of shammy infomercials and a music career with such nostalgia singles as, "Where's Da Money", "Where All Da Money Go" and "What Happen to All Da Money?"


America's Leaders Send Their Condolences




From the United States of Alaska, to the Democratic People's Republic of Minnesota, from the bloody trench warfare of Westchester  to the farthest South American outposts of the Empire of Texas, the messages of sympathy came as tribute to the passing of the man who had made their fractured existence possible.

Remembering Obama





A Complicated Legacy


Survived only by one racist white granddaughter, Ariana Michaela Stover, a member of the New Klu Klux Klan, his real legacy remains the political and economic chaos that he so cheerfully spawned.



It may be that there was no real Obama, only a man who served as a metaphor for a culture that had lost touch with its own identity, embracing change for the sake of novelty and becoming incapable of paying attention to anything that was not entertaining enough.




  1. Anonymous20/8/13

    Very nice! Now THIS I like! We need a 'rosebud' moment that pulls it all together...which I can't think of right now.

    But clever and imaginative-- thanks!

  2. Anonymous20/8/13

    Fits right in with the jargon of our present time. Delightful!

  3. Anonymous20/8/13

    Some true and fascinating facts:

    Obama is the first president to have a tombstone with only ideograms on it for his illiterate base. The ideogram meaning he was male confuses them and they tend to urinate on his grave.

    Muslim Brotherhood had a memorial ceremony for him. Suicide bombers exploding made nice touch at end of 1812 Overture.

    First President to be buried in a coffin lined with mirrors so he can see his own reflection for eternity. Who says there is no heaven!!

    Jay Carney gave the eulogy at the funeral. He insisted Obama was still alive despite casket in front of him.

    Choom gang gathers every year at the grave for a 21 bong salute.

    Eric Holder castigated America for being too cowardly too deify Obama.

    Reset button expected to resurrect him at any time.

  4. Anonymous20/8/13

    Not a very complete Obit. It didn't even mention his disbandment (via Executive Order) of U.S. Congress just hours before they were to impeach him for treason.

  5. occupant 920/8/13

    Obama/Soetoro/??? will be known for actively destroying America and for that sinister deed of "hope and change," America's Left will see him as the most "patriotic American" in the nation's history, despite being wholly unqualified to serve as POTUS, not least of due to his supposed father's actual British Commonwealth status as a citizen of Kenya in 1961.

  6. SuzyQue20/8/13

    "Empire of Texas"

    It's got a ring to it, doesn't it?

  7. I don't know, this post America world doesn't sound all that bad. I think the main thing will be people will finally see the results of Progressive-ism. Although I think Obama's fate may be more like the fall of Ghaddafi if this becomes reality or maybe like the fall of Sadam. This would make a fantastic Sci-Fi book, a continuation of the Orwellian traditional novella.

  8. Anonymous21/8/13

    While Charles Darwin was travelling on his round the world expedition he was having a conversation with a man in Chile:

    The host, talking about the state of Chile as compared to other countries, was very humble:
    "Some see with two eyes,
    and some with one,
    but for my part I do not think that Chile sees with any."
    -- Charles Darwin "The Voyage of the Beagle"

    Perhaps, with the help of Mr Greenfield, there might still be hope that the United States can still see with one eye.

  9. Anonymous21/8/13

    If anyone thinks that the States will be left to decide amongst themselves their own future as the country begins to disintegrate, think again.
    The world is still ruled by carnivores, as soon as the states begin to go their own way there will scavengers ready to come crashing in and rip the carcass of the US apart.
    China would be the first to rip off a chunk, Russia would be next, Mexico is invading even now.
    This was one of the main reasons that Lincoln fought the Civil War, to keep the country united and unassailable, to avoid the horrors of disintegration..
    The future of the US under Obama is to descend into19th century European endless ethnic, racial, neo-nationalistic and international wars.
    And given non-white Obama's "chip on his shoulder" against white colonialist America, a disintegrated humbled America is just the outcome he is trying to engineer.

  10. Anonymous21/8/13

    Tolja - OBAMAHDI

    Methinks thou doth jest too much..
    ^^^ NOT A CHANCE


  11. "King Lamar Alexander II of the Constitutional Monarchy of Tennessee"

    Please, no. Say it ain't so. We're trying to get rid of this crook.

  12. Anonymous21/8/13

    Please, please, did Valjar survive? She did ! I always knew she was a vampire..

  13. Could not be more entertaining. Sometimes you just hafta let loose doncha?

  14. Anonymous21/8/13

    Empire of Texas has a nice ring to it.

    But you left out how utterly boring Obama is. How I've yet to listen to an entire speech of us.

    At least we could laugh at Ford for being a klutz, and GWB for being a little dense. At the end of the day Obama is nothing more than a well-groomed composite leader.



  16. 11Fsteve in the desert22/8/13

    OUTSTANDING. You captured it with this paragraph:


  17. Very charming piece. At first, I thought it would have been better without the humorous exaggerations, but it works just fine. After all, this country has become an exercise in excess!

  18. Anonymous25/8/13

    President Obama made a liar out of me when I wrote that he was boring. He was in Buffalo and could tell the difference between Congressman Brian Higgins and mayor Byron Brown. Obama didn't look to thrilled when the crowd became very vocal and corrected him.

    College kids had to correct him. Anyway, it had me roaring.

    LOL again when Bernie Tolbert, who is running against Brown used Obama's mistake in a campaign ad.

    So yeah, the president was entertaining lol. What's with him? We have 57 states, Marine "corpse" and a US Congressman as mayor?




  19. Anonymous25/8/13

    * could not tell the difference




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