You Don't Know Anything About Baby Bumps

Show me your board certification in obstetrics and then we can talk.

Baby bump controversy

We've all seen a pregnant lady. Maybe it was in the mirror, maybe it was your sister, a friend, a lady walking down the sidewalk, or someone in your office. Not to mention, we've all been inside a pregnant lady. But that doesn't make us all experts about pregnancy — what it feels like, how it should be handled, and what a healthy one looks like.

And yet, the whole world seems to weigh in on a new bump every week:

Daegan Coyne is definitely too small.

Revie Jane Schulz is almost certainly too big.

Chontel Dundan was too muscular.

Tess Holliday was too overweight.

Emily Breeze Ross did Crossfit too late into her pregnancy.

Adriana Sant'anna had a belly that was too transparent.

Sia Cooper kept her six-pack abs, which was totally bad for the baby.

Mirella Ingamells got her incredible abs back right away, which can't be normal.

It's so easy to have an opinion about these stories, to read and examine and ponder with genuine interest, because there's a photo! And, wow, maybe that pregnancy doesn't look like what you expected. It doesn't look like yours did, or like your friend's, or like your coworker's.

But you're not these women's doctors. And one actual doctor, Jennifer Hirshfeld-Cytron of the Fertility Centers of Illinois, is dismayed by the "unfair, inappropriate" responses to all of these baby bump photos. "I think those comments are offensive and incredibly misplaced," she says. "Every woman's body handles pregnancy in different ways. People distribute weight differently. It's presumptuous to assume that you can make these assessments for them."

That's especially true because there are medical assessments that actually help monitor the size of the woman and the fetus she's carrying, Hirshfeld-Cytron says. For example, ultrasounds check how much the fetus is growing, while fundal height indicates how much a woman's uterus is growing. "[Doctors] try to assess the size of the uterus, not the size of the abdomen," she says, which is a key distinction. A belly that looks extra-large to the naked eye doesn't necessarily correlate to an extra-large uterus or fetus.

And, yes, there are guidelines for how much weight a woman should gain. "The goal weight for a woman to gain is 30-35 pounds overall," Hirshfeld-Cytron says, which could come from just 200 extra calories a day. "The American College of OB-GYNs puts out guidelines that someone should meet throughout their pregnancy." But those numbers could be different if a woman isn't at a normal weight pre-pregnancy—if someone is underweight to begin with, they need to eat more throughout their pregnancy to stay healthy; the opposite would be true of an overweight person.

The appearance of a baby bump can really vary, as well. There are so many factors that go into a pregnant woman's appearance, Hirshfeld-Cytron says, from pre-baby weight to current caloric intake to how much she's exercising to whether or not she's had a baby before. A perfect example: "Someone who hasn't been pregnant before will show more slowly," she explains.

"People think that only their abdomen should be protruding," Hirshfeld-Cytron continues. "For the vast majority of women, that's just not the case." Some women's breasts will grow multiple cup sizes; some women's entire face shapes will change. You might know a woman who looked like she simply slipped a basketball under her shirt, which Hirshfeld-Cytron chalks up to two factors: "genetics and luck."

But back to those viral bump stories—the real question is, why do we all care so much? Because we as a society like talking about women's bodies. "People feel that [these photos are] in the public domain, and that it's appropriate to give feedback on people's physical appearance," she says. "I think women are much more subjected than men, and we translate that to pregnancy."

Does that make it OK? Of course not. But the human body is insanely cool — never more so than during pregnancy. Learn about that, if you're interested. Ask about it, even, if the woman is so inclined to humor your questions. Otherwise, if you're so interested, go to medical school.

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