Melon Is Murder!

I used to be a vegetarian.

For a hazy year or so back in college, I gave up meat. I can't remember why, exactly, though I think it was roughly equal parts health reasons and environmental reasons and ethical reasons and annoying-my-parents reasons.

Eventually, I gave up giving up meat. Today I heartily enjoy hamburgers, cheesesteaks, bacon, all manner of fowl, and pigs in various blankets. Well, it's mostly hearty enjoyment. I'll admit to feeling just a twinge of guilt every time I sink my teeth into flesh -- into food that came from something conscious.
That's why it was so gratifying to read the following recent headline:

Plants 'Can Think and Remember'

Yes, that's right. As the accompanying article on goes on to explain:



Finally! Some science-based rationalization that will help take the edge off the guilt I feel, in the back of my mind, every time I gnaw a chicken strip.

Cow, chicken, pig, arugula... They all think and feel, man. If you're gonna eat one, might as well eat 'em all, right?

Now, to erase my guilt completely, all we need is a headline like this one:

Cows, Other Delicious Animals 'Want to be Eaten'

Till then, who wants to join me for a footlong cheeseburger? space

space Note to Readers As you may recall, Mrs. RW Daily and I are expecting a baby. Like, soon. Any time now. (Her due date was actually yesterday, so the kid is late. Already, she's taking after her old man.) So if you don't hear from me for a little while, you'll know why. -- Mark

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