Me Thinks He Protests too Much!

At our transgender support group meeting last night, I heard a self professed cross dresser say emphatically he couldn't be transgender because he likes women. The whole outburst was a little unnerving to me because he looked straight (no pun intended) at me when he said it.

I simply said, don't tell my cis-woman partner of five plus years I can't like women because I'm trans.

From there, and I am not sure he listened, other's in the room tried to explain the difference between gender (between the ears) and sexuality (between the legs).

I guess I shouldn't have been surprised at his lack of understanding and hopefully a few more statements such as that will help him to understand. Plus, it just so happens, I know at least a couple more of the participants are married to, or live with cis women and a couple more participants are bi-sexual.

A learning experience for him to be sure. I hope a positive one.

Perhaps too, if you have heard the old saying "if a person protests too much they may have a skeleton or two dancing in their closet." He may be experiencing a fantasy or two keeping his skeletons dancing.


  1. Yeah, I like girls.....and football too! So what? Lots of women, trans and cis do, as well. How old is this guy, and how long has he been cross dressing? I spent most of my life questioning my gender identity, not coming to such conclusions as that. Obviously, though, he picked the wrong crowd to make that proclamation.

    When I came out to my family, my then 15-year-old grandson had two concerns: Would I leave his grandmother, and did I still like football. No, and yes were my answers, and everything was cool. I hope this cross dresser can open his mind as much as a 15-year-old.

  2. I am so tempted to repeat my favorite joke, you know the one, "What's the difference between a crossdresser and a trans sexual?" ~ "about three years" (actually that's a lie, my favorite joke is "A white horse walks into a bar and orders a beer, while he's pouring it the bar man says ~ "We've got a whisky named after you!" and the horse answers "What!? Nigel?"

    Anyway I digress the thing about trans people is that we reflect all of society, we are Black, White, and every other available colour; we are straight, gay, bi, pan, or asexual; we are liberal and conservative; we are fat and thin; male, female, or non binary; basically we are just the same as everybody else ~ and of course that means that some of us are liars, cheats, sexual predators, and of course some of us are simply stupid!


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