But I wanna tell you a story because it actually happened, unlike most of the crap that I talk about on stage. You know the one. He always seems to think that to be skeptical is to be cynical. You know, in Australia, they just have taxis. Stumbled on a watch I’d assume it had a watchmaker, That a muffin presupposes a baker, So you must agree sooner or later, That this proves there’s a creator. Well, I mean, not only is it good science, bu it’s also really thrilling, don’t you think, this idea that an individual of a species can be born sort of mutated in a good way! See what I’m saying? Because, obviously, on stage I look like

That is in general usage, isn’t it? The other reason- The other reason you don’t have sex is just cos your focuses change. And, eventually, it wears you down. Bob the fucking Builder! Unfortunatly, I didn’t come up with it myself, I read that in a book. It’s called, uh, I’ve given it a title.

It’s got a real sense of excitement. In which case, you might be better off spelling sutbitles sentence ‘I wanna your mm. Paul, have you got those, um, those, uh, reds. And then, obviously, we actually end up on the couch, and we kiss, and, uh, a little bit on with the jumper action, uh, it’s heavy petting, and then, passion overwhelmes us, so we stumble to the bedroom, tearing off each other’s clothes, and I get out the Mickey Mouse ears, and I length the bungee rope, and obviously, the Hungr Hungry Hippos.

Sometimes, ’cause material like that doesn’t necessarily respect entirely some of the, um, idiosyncracies of a couple of major monotheistic doctines, um, people make the assumption -upon listening to such material- that I’m not religious myself.

Tim Minchin: So Live subtitles French

I have a problem with stockbrokers. So I thought- Being a poet, I chose a text message as my You are a wealthy, wealthy man And mate, Munchin dont want to piss in your pocket But sjbtitles gotta say Before I get on my way That honestly And Im not having you on I reckon on day you could play piano as good as Elton John! You know, subittles it’s six foot high, and it said: Maybe this seed, like, maybe, all they need is a really good peace-anthem.


And a women had given birth to naturally-conceived, identical quadruplet girls, which is very rare. If you know the words. I think it might be even more helpful to sort of do in front of a sympathetic, non-judgmental, kind and neutral crowd like you guys.

Like, with someone else.

And, anyway, because the ‘fk’ is so commonly used these days, it actually, these days, means ‘fuck’. But I believe in things, you know?

So F**king Rock (Live) – Tim Minchin | Shazam

And it’s worse than ever, mostly, I think, because of digital technologies. At any given time, and you can’t help but feel excited because, odds are Dont you know you wanna Rock it with me Rock it with me!

Thereby expressing myself without having to confront anyone. Imagine being the first dude ever to have feet. And, anyway, that wouldn’t make sense, because it revolves around me.

This is an interval song This is an interval song This is an interval song Cause it’s the interval.

The main one, of course, the famous black cab, you know, the English cab. I didn’t mean, like- I mean the first one, the low status one, not the high status one. Wo did a charity gig, and I had to go on stage after Mariah Carey! So it comes as a surprise.

This is a song about, um, the conversation I had with a stockbroker, in a pub once. But if you’re gonna lip-sync, why would you do a Mariah Carey song?


Which I can manipulate to suit my world-view. And I got a letter recently, subtitled a woman, when I was performing in Perth saying that she didn’t see why I had to use such a crass language. Because of your very positive reaction, I’m gonna do one more song.

I’m basi- It’s nice to be diplomatic and stuff, but I- It comes from a fear of confrontation, I think. So, this is, um, this is my poem. I mean, I love Perth. So that I don’tyou know, um, bottle it up. And I started this- um Ive got a record and I reckon its wicked And I th-think you should s-spread it around He said, Hey Tim, I quite like your work He said Its clever and quirky But I promise you this You could be clever as Voltaire But it wont get you nowhere If you wanna sell discs Clever never made no one rich It doesnt appeal to the teenage market The teenage market!

Your skin is so smooth, I couldn’t afford you with hair You have all the holes real girls have got plus one for the air Your problems are simple, I don’t need my Masters in Psych To know if you get down I just perk you right up With a couple of squirts from the pump off my bike.

Hey, You know that feeling, I think we all get that feeling sometimes, this feeling- You know that feeling you get when you feel like you’re the smallest doll in a Babooshka doll?

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