How to Interact with a Person Who Uses a Wheelchair

Co-authored by Paul Chernyak, LPC

Updated: July 3, 2019

Explore this Article Being Respectful Being Considerate Being Polite Article Summary Questions & Answers Related Articles References


Being Respectful

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    • Only ask a wheelchair user why they use a wheelchair after you've become familiar. This question is not appropriate from strangers.
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    Ask permission before touching the user or their wheelchair. Patting or leaning on the chair may be interpreted as disrespectful. The person may be using a wheelchair because of an injury, so your touch may be painful in addition to patronizing.
    • Treat a wheelchair as an extension of a person's body. If you wouldn't put your hand on that person's shoulder, then don't put your hand on their wheelchair unnecessarily. Always respect a wheelchair user's personal space.[3]

Being Considerate

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    • When shopping, be aware of scooter/wheelchair users and try to keep to one side or the other of an aisle. Share the aisle; walk as you would drive.
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    Offer, but don't assume a person using a wheelchair wants help. If you see a situation where a wheelchair user could use your help, ask first. Don't be offended if a person declines; they are probably just very independent. [5] For example, if you see a person in a wheelchair approaching an entrance, you can ask, "Would you like me to get the door for you?" If you see a person using a wheelchair struggling up a steep incline, you might ask "Would you like me to help you up the hill?"
    • Never move a person's wheelchair without permission. They may have had it positioned to transfer to and from the chair easily.

Being Polite

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    When you first encounter a person using a wheelchair, shake hands, just as you would greeting anybody else. A handshake will establish a physical connection a diminish psychological barriers to emotional connection.[6] Even in cases where the person has a prosthetic limb, it is generally acceptable to shake hands.
    • If the person is not able or does not wish to shake your hand, they will likely decline politely. Don't take offence, the rejection most likely is about concern regarding the physical act and has nothing to do with you.
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    • As in any conversation, if the person indicates they would prefer you avoided particular phrases, it is polite to honor the request.
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    • If the person makes jokes about their chair, it may be appropriate to join the banter, but never initiate it.

Community Q&A

Add New Question
  • Question
    How do I help someone when they fall down?
    Community Answer
    Ask whether they need help. Some people are able to get themselves back up, and it may be easier and less painful for them to do it without help. If they want assistance, they will tell you what they need. If they are unconscious, dazed, or bleeding, get them the appropriate medical help immediately.
  • Question
    My wife is wheelchair-bound and helping her dress can be difficult. Do you have any suggestions to make it easier for us?
    Tom De Backer
    Top Answerer
    Look into clothes she likes that open at the back. Think ponchos, but more stylish and adapted to her tastes. Or consider having some of her clothing items tailored with a zipper or buttons at the back. Try different positions when getting dressed, such as lying on the bed or holding on to a set of even bars, if possible. Try making this a fun, enjoyable, perhaps even erotic moment, taking the troublesome aspect out of it. Take out enough time to avoid stress when time is short.
  • Question
    Mr. Jackson uses a wheelchair. When he arrives, my waiting room is crowded and I'm not sure if he can make his way around the other patients. What should I do?
    Luna Rose
    Top Answerer
    If he seems just fine, then let him be. He's probably used to crowds, so he might be able to make his own way through and ask people to move as needed. If he looks shy or stressed, you can say "Good morning/afternoon, Mr. Jackson. Do you have enough space to make it through the crowd?" Upon overhearing this, other people are likely to move politely to make way. If someone is directly in his way, Mr. Jackson (or you if he's shy) can say "Please make room so I/he can get by." Common courtesy still applies in crowds, and people can move if asked.
  • Question
    Should I help them get up when they want to and should I ask?
    Community Answer
    Of course offer to help. But don't make them think that the only reason you help is because you are feeling sorry for them. They want to feel like you are a close friend, and that's the only way they will take your help, if you offer it, because you're a good friend who cares about them personally.
  • Question
    How can I express a phrase like "Please take a seat" to someone who is already sitting in a wheelchair?
    Community Answer
    Commonly used expressions like this, or "I see what you mean" (for those with visual impairments), are generally fine. Most people will not mind.
  • Question
    What do I do when my wheelchair mate is being teased? He gets it a lot.
    Community Answer
    If you know the person teasing him/her, go talk to this person and explain it is not nice to make fun of a person with disabilities. Remind them that they would hate being teased if they were in the disabled person's position. If you do not know the person teasing your friend, just console him, and tell your friend that he shouldn't listen to them. Then make /him laugh a lot, so he will forget about the teasing! Stand up for your friend whenever needed and expect him to do the same for you.
  • Question
    How do I make it less awkward for both me and my friend (who requires a wheelchair for a specific amount of time)?
    Jenna Swain-Radford
    Community Answer
    Talk to your friend as you would normally. It's only a wheelchair.
  • Question
    Can a person strain their heart by pushing someone in a wheelchair?
    Community Answer
    Physical exertion of any type puts additional strain on the heart. Pushing a wheelchair does take more effort than walking, but it's not usually strenuous exercise. If you have heart issues, talk to your doctor for specific advice.
  • Question
    I have a homework assignment and I need to know what things most people in wheelchairs can/can't do.
    Community Answer
    That varies from person to person because people use wheelchairs for different reasons. Some use them because they fatigue easily while walking, and others use them because they can't walk at all. Try asking a few people how they use their wheelchairs and see what kinds of answers you get.
  • Question
    In an old age home, how would I treat a person in a wheelchair?
    Community Answer
    Treat the elderly the same way you would treat anyone else in a wheelchair.
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    • Don't step over or on the wheelchair user's feet. Just because they aren't using them to walk doesn't make them no longer a part of their body.
    • Never abandon a shopping cart in a parking space, especially in or near a designated handicapped/accessible space.
    • Make eye contact with the wheelchair user when talking to them. Ideally, as stated, put yourself at their level, by sitting down next to them.


    • Do not classify or think of people who use wheelchairs as invalids or sick. Many wheelchair users are in very good health, so this is inaccurate, in addition to being rude.

    Article SummaryX

    When you’re interacting with someone who uses a wheelchair, the best thing you can do is treat them just like you would anyone else. To do so, speak directly to them, rather than only to whoever might be accompanying them. You should also avoid making jokes about their wheelchair since it could be offensive and inappropriate, and also because it puts the focus on the wheelchair instead of them as a person. Just because someone is in a wheelchair doesn’t mean they want help, so you should always ask before offering assistance. For more tips from our Counseling co-author, including how to be considerate when using public spaces with designated areas for wheelchair use, read on!

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    Article Info



    Categories: Featured Articles | Mobility Disabilities

    In other languages:

    Español: interactuar con alguien que usa una silla de ruedas, Italiano: Interagire con una Persona Sulla Sedia a Rotelle, Русский: обращаться с человеком, который пользуется инвалидным креслом, Bahasa Indonesia: Berinteraksi dengan Pengguna Kursi Roda, 日本語: 車椅子を利用している人と接する, العربية: التعامل مع شخص يستخدم كرسياً متحركاً, Français: interagir avec une personne en fauteuil roulant, ไทย: ปฏิสัมพันธ์กับผู้ใช้วีลแชร์, 한국어: 휠체어 사용자를 대하는 방법, Deutsch: Mit einem Rollstuhlbenutzer umgehen, Nederlands: Omgaan met iemand in een rolstoel

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