3 Steps to Improve Your Relationship with Yourself


I'm going to just come right out and say that the most important relationship you will ever have with anyone is your relationship with yourself. It is so important. You need to love and accept yourself for who you are and be okay with whatever other people decide about you. 

What they think about you really has nothing to do with you. It has everything to do with them, with their thoughts and what they are going through. Remember this when you are feeling down or feeling like you don't have any friends.

The only person who needs to like you is you. It's not your family's job to like you. It's not your friends' job or anyone else's job to like you. It's your job. 

If you struggle with this, I have three steps you can take to improve your relationship with yourself.


Awareness is a great first step. Really start listening to yourself. Pay attention to how you are feeling. Your feelings are your biggest clue as to what is going on in your mind. If you aren't feeling good, it means you aren't having thoughts that serve you.

Pay attention to your feelings and start noticing what thoughts you are having that are creating those feelings. Once you can narrow down your thoughts, ask yourself why you are choosing to think them.

So much of the time our thoughts are habitual. We think them and we don't even realize we are thinking them. The problem with this is that when we realize what we are thinking, we want to immediately change them. Before you change your thoughts, you need to understand why you are thinking them in the first place, otherwise they will keep coming back. You have to get to the root of the thought in order to let go of it.


Once you have become more aware of what is going on in your mind, you need to be super careful. It's natural for your brain to spin on negative thoughts. It's really good at finding what is wrong. This doesn't mean there is something wrong with you. You have to have compassion and you need to learn to appreciate yourself for who you are.

When you don't like what is in your brain, you need to give it better thoughts to think. Tell it what you like about yourself. Tell it what you like about life. What kind of flowers do you like? What's your favorite outfit? What could you spend hours doing? Find positivity and feed it to your brain.

When you appreciate yourself you put yourself in a state of abundance. This is living like the buffalo. Everything you need is inside of you. Open yourself up to it.


So you start with awareness and you add in appreciation. Now, those are nice ways to be nicer to yourself. But respect is important to because you want to honor your word to yourself. If you decide to not do the laundry today because you're too tired or there is too much going on so you tell yourself you will do it tomorrow, you need to make sure that when tomorrow rolls around, you do the laundry.

If you had a lunch date with a friend and at the last minute you decided you didn't feel like going, would you cancel? Would you call her and tell her that you just didn't feel like meeting her? Probably not.

Sometimes we treat others better than we treat ourselves. If you have a goal you are wanting to meet, the only way you are going to get your result is if you take action. You have to follow through and do what you say you're going to do.

When you respect yourself and you follow though, you start to build confidence in yourself and your abilities. You know that when you say you are going to do something, it's going to get done. When you start small, you can gain momentum and begin taking on bigger goals.

love yourself

These three things: awareness, appreciation, and respect, will help you improve your relationship with yourself. When you have a better relationship with yourself you show up as you authentically are. You want to show up, and that is the amazing thing. When you want to show up, you can serve those around you without resentment, and you can feel fulfilled.