How to Mail-Order a Steak

And why Zagat guides are terrible.
<a href="" target="_blank">LaFrieda</a>


What is the best Internet/mail-order steak/meat purveyor? I have used Fossil Farms, with much success. Other than the monkey meat from Omaha Steaks, you have any recommendations?
David Santibanez, Location Withheld

I am a close friend and ally of the LaFriedas, and a big believer in their online retail business, especially for their irreplaceable ground beef, but there are some other good ones, too. Fossil Farms does a great job, especially with game meats, and D'Artganan is the go-to source for foie gras, demi-glace, duck confit, and other hard-to-find gourmet products. I once got a very fine veal chop from the Allen Brothers, too.

I am a food writer but I'm starting to have an attack of ethics about eating meat. Do I have to quit my job now?
Helen Rosner, New York City


What's America's best sandwich, other than the hamburger? Cheeseteak? Roast Pork w Rabe/Prov? Monte Cristo? Pulled Pork? BLT?
Temp6868, via Twitter

It's funny you write that today, Temp, as this past Thursday was National Grilled Cheese Sandwich Day, a holiday I observe religiously. I say this because I feel strongly that the grilled cheese and bacon sandwich may be our greatest accomplishment as a nation, on par with the moon landing and Lady Gaga. I have actually written a long and eloquent essay, possibly my finest work, on this subject. It can be read here.

If a friend says she's a "fun fabulous foodie" in her Twitter profile, what is the best course of action, short of honor killing?
Johnny LaRue, Toronto, Canada

Maybe find a nice gentleman who will call on her — being sure to bring some treats for Truffle and Mr. Whiskers.

Salads seem like they are for pussies. What's the most manly salad you've ever eaten?
Naomi Pomeroy, Portland, Oregeon

Mark Ladner, then of Lupo, once made a salad with scrapple croutons. That might have to be it. Salad is sort of for pussies, though, I agree. Nobody likes salad.

Who is your food mentor?

Catherine Van Duyne, Ventnor, New Jersey

I don't really have a mentor, Cathy. As a writer I have people I admire, like Tom Junod, Dennis Cooper, and Thomas Babbington Macaulay. As a student of meat, though, my pope is Adam Perry Lang, a chef of such surpassing intellectual power that I submit to him on almost every subject. Even when I disagree, I listen. His wrong opinons are more edifying than somebody else's who happens to be right.

Dear Josh Ozersky: Why the fuck couldn't you have kept Keith McNally to yourselves? That's why we sent him to you in the first place.

Jay Rayner, London, England

Jay, I realize that as a feared British restaurant critic, you have strong opinions, but is it really necessary to speak so slightingly of a man like Keith McNally? I for one think London is lucky to have him, and ought to be proud to have produced him. I actually forgot that he was an Englishman until you brought it up, and what greater compliment could there be to him than that? "For he himself has said it...and it's greatly to his credit...."

What advice do you have in the pant-buying department?

Gavin McLeod, Hollywood, California

That's an easy one. Sansabelt! They are the slacks of choice for portly men everywhere.

Josh, some suggest that flipping a steak regularly — every 20 seconds — over the high heat of a BBQ is the best way to ensure even cooking and a good char. Others say to flip once and leave it be. Who's right?
Russell Stedman, Vancouver, Canada

I've heard Adam Perry Lang advance the theory you mention, but while he is almost always right about everything, I have to at least partially disagree here. You get the most even browning that way, but not the kind of dangerous mahogany sizzle that I find the best and most emotionally satisfying way to cook meat. The problem for many chefs is that a super-aggressive sear tends to retard even cooking. Nathan Myhrvold even suggests searing a frozen steak in oil and then slow-cooking it. My thing is, I just don't care. I want sizzle, the hiss and pop of flareups and crust. And I don't care if the meat isn't pink edge to edge. Not one bit. Meat isn't meant to be under our absolute control.

I am a chef starting a food blog called,"The Oyster and the Egg". It is about the origins and experience of foods, how they are treated differently, and the commonalities among cultures. What tips do you have as to keeping my posts interesting and concise? As well as means of monetizing such a blog?
Todd Brady, Varina, Virginia

It's hard. A blog is a yawning, insatiable maw, a black hole, a Sarlacc. It will beat you sooner or later. Crowdsource some content, as I have here, when you can. Write short posts. Keep them punchy. Be obsessive and passionate, and let your work speak to whom it speaks. And forget about monetizing it. It could happen, but it won't, and likely never will. Just do it for love, and hope for the best.

Do you think dining guide books like Zagat and Michelin are becoming irrelevant in a digital age?
Harry Flager, via Twitter

Becoming? Zagat became irrelevant the day the Usenet was invented, and Michelin has been circling the bowl for years. But as much of a botch job as their New York guides have been — and make no mistake, they are terrible — they still represent a unified, objective standard, at least in theory, against which one can measure restaurants. Or used to, before they started doling out stars to restaurants where you sit on stools listening to rock music.

As for Zagat, it has no reason for being whatsoever. It has no perspective and no accountability: Its "reviews" consist of mindless phrases by anonymous people whom you don't know, can't trust, and have been edited to death by unseen hands. (Take it from me — I once was one.) Zagat is basically a fetal Yelp, with a tweet-like word limit, no pictures, no profiles, and — to complete the picture — a community peopled entirely by middle-aged flibbertigibbets. Review sites like Yelp and Citysearch, or something just like them, are the future. There will always be a few writers whose opinions you trust or are at least interested in, and they can sometimes be correctives to the hive-mind aspects of foodie discourse. But the idea of a book that you carry around and read anonymous reviews in? Why not just wear a powdered wig while you're at it?

What's the most terrible food your mother/father/grandmother inflicted on you as a kid?
Grace Piper, Brooklyn, New York

I usually had my way as a child, which is one reason I am such a terrible adult. Old English garlic rounds with little squares of American cheese, Whoppers, and thick pieces of fried Hebrew National salami largely made up my diet. My grandmother loved me so much that she would make a breakfast of eggs, sausage links, and buttery, paprika-sprinkled hash browns and serve them to me in a tripartite foil tray so I could eat it in the car on the way to school. A child like that will never eat brown bread, carrot sticks, or the kind of peanut butter than has oil on top. And so I didn't. And don't.

Have a question? Ask Eat Like a Man >>

Advertisement - Continue Reading Below
More From Food