Top 8 bagel jokes of all time

Why are bagels the subject of so many jokes? We don’t know, but we sure do love it. Here is a list of some of our favorite puns:


  1. What kind of bagel can fly?

A plain bagel

  1. How do you hold a bagel back?

You put lox on it

  1. Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

If they flew over the bay, they would be bagels!

  1. Why did the bagel lose the election?

He was the victim of a schmear campaign

  1. What does a bagel do when it is locked out of its house?

Call a loxsmith

  1. What do ghosts put on their bagels?

Scream Cheese

  1. What did the bagel say to the pastor?

I’m holier than you

  1. What does a bagel call its grandfather?



Become the life of the next party you attend by sharing these with your friends. The crowd will love you!