An American Addiction Centers Resource

New to the Forums?Join or

Should you avoid drinking around drug abusing friends?

Discussion in 'Helping an Addicted Friend' started by Zyni, Nov 1, 2014.

  1. Zyni

    Zyni Community Champion

    Even if alcohol is not their drug of choice, is it better not to indulge in any substances around people who suffer from addiction? When we are out, he always says to have a drink if we want one, but it feels awkward. I think it's better not to. I don't know.
  2. Nick W.

    Nick W. Community Listener Community Listener

    Some people tell me that they don't want me acting any "different" around them, that it's their problem and not mine, but I try to not drink or indulge around those that it might be a trigger for. I look at it as a courtesy and just trying to make it easy for them.
    MrsJones and Zyni like this.
  3. LostmySis

    LostmySis Senior Contributor

    Addicts have a drug of choice. Some may have more than one. But most likely if your friend is a recovery cocaine addict, drinking a beer will not set him tail spinning. But again, this is individual. It is like saying "My friend doesn't smoke, but is trying to quit drinking. Can I smoke in front of him?" See how that depends on the friend?
  4. zaerine

    zaerine Community Champion

    I think it will be great not to drink or avoid drinking around addicted people or drug abusing friends.
    It is like helping them to avoid getting into another addiction. Also drinking with those kind of people might just get you into trouble especially if they got drunk and tend to be violent.
  5. Charli

    Charli Community Champion

    I think it just depends on your gut feeling as every person and relationship is unique. In my opinion, either could prove to be equally flawed, but generally I think it's best to just carry on as usual and just be observant in seeing if the person can handle it well enough or not, but of course only within a certain limit since drinking and getting drunk and wasted are still two fairly different things.
    dejanee22 likes this.
  6. DancingLady

    DancingLady Community Champion

    I think it depends on the situation. Moderation would definitely be something to keep in mind. If alcohol is not a problem for the person you are with, then having a drink would probably be OK, but you probably should not have too much as you don't want your judgement to be clouded and unintentionally say or do something that might be triggering for them.
  7. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    It's better not to. If that friend is trying to deal with their addiction problem [even if it's not alcohol] they may in time decide to instead drink alcohol and who knows, they may substitute whatever drug they were using for alcohol.

    So I think it's a lot better not to drink around drug abusing friends. Sometimes people want you to 'commiserate' with them. Be that kind of good friend.
  8. LifeOrDeath

    LifeOrDeath Member

    Even if it may not affect him that much, I think that would be nice to do. Show them he is surrounded with people who can control their urges. He will follow your footsteps.
  9. shandrum

    shandrum Member

    I would say, out of respect for your friend, even if he says it's ok, I would opt out on taking a drink in front of him. You may very well be able to take just one. But, it may really put pressure on him to indulge when he cannot indulge. It's kinda like when you are on a diet and your friend's come in with your favorite dessert and all you feel is "I want it!" It takes a a lot of will power to say no to that favorite piece of dessert you love. So, if the will power is not strong enough, you may break. The same holds true for any other form of addiction.
    dejanee22 likes this.
  10. maryannballeras

    maryannballeras Senior Contributor

    I also recommend not drinking around friends who abuse, whether it be alcohol or substance. Because there will always be a very slim chance that you might also be encourage to abuse, and of course, we don't want that to happen. Better be safe than sorry.
    dejanee22 likes this.
  11. gmckee1985

    gmckee1985 Senior Contributor

    Yes, I think you should avoid drinking in front of addicted friends. I think you should set a positive example for them. You don't want them being tempted into going tback to destructive behaviors. Alcohol included. You don't even want them thinking about any type of substance. So set a good example and don't drink in front of them.
  12. Twinsmommy31

    Twinsmommy31 Active Contributor

    I think a good friend would keep the temptation away from their friends. You can always enjoy those things on your own time. I feel it shows total support when you abstain from these activities in front of your friend.
  13. Winterybella

    Winterybella Community Champion

    I would want to stay away from drinking in the friend's presence especially if I know the friend has a problem in this area. I see it as a sign of solidarity. You are letting your friend know you have his or her back.

    It would be interesting to see what others have to say as I am sure someone might take a completely different approach.
    Last edited: Nov 17, 2014
  14. gmckee1985

    gmckee1985 Senior Contributor

    glad that there seems to be a lot of agreement on this issue. it's really in poor taste to drink around your friends who are having problems with substance abuse. you can always wait until you're not around them to do so. it's not like you have to quit completely. just be more aware of your friends mental state and don't do anything that would tempt them into relapsing.
  15. amethyst

    amethyst Community Champion

    I think it would be a really sensible thing to not drink around friends who have problems with substance abuse. If you care about your friend, you will do anything to avoid leading him down that dark path again.
    At the same time, it's not always easy to restrict your own needs and personal habits all the time. For example, if you enjoy drinking a glass of wine or a beer with your lunch, you shouldn't have to hold back because of your alcoholic friend. I believe it all depends on the situation and general mood of the both of you. Common sense is the key.
    dejanee22 likes this.
  16. mkCampbell

    mkCampbell Active Contributor

    I agree with everyone's thoughts on this issue but what about when that person attends an event where drinking is going to happen because that's part of the event? We have a yearly cookout and craft beer party with a group of about 20 plus friends. Everyone shares craft beer. That's the whole thing. It's not a drunk fest by any means, in fact, some of these beers are so heavy I'm done after one sip! But our good friend who is recovering is part of the core group and one heck of an outdoor cook. We invited him last summer as he was more than welcome, he drank tea and brought N/A beer. So maybe there's a work a round for some people.
  17. jobenvy

    jobenvy Member

    Even drinking can lead a recovering drug addict back into his/her habit. All it takes is a few drinks get a buzz and they lose all control and end up calling their old drug pusher. If you're out with a recovering drug addict best to avoid bars night clubs at all cost. Plenty of other fun things to do besides drinking.
  18. Zyni

    Zyni Community Champion

    Drinking isn't only in night clubs and bars. It's in restaurants and parties, and with the holidays coming, even more parties. Many people even have wine with Thanksgiving dinner. There is a lot of exposure to it, so I feel like me saying no might help in some small way. Like I said, I don't know, since this person has never been much of a drinker. It still just doesn't sit well.
  19. GenevB

    GenevB Community Champion

    Well probably yes, it is better to not drink around drug addicts. After all you don't know what you can do being drunk.
  20. jeremy2

    jeremy2 Community Champion

    Trust your instincts and don't succumb to any pressure.Uphold your values and dignity and resist any attempts by your peers to indulge. That first sip may be your beginning of addiction and i believe you don't want to take that road.