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The affair

A 29 year old man was dating a woman called ‘Lorraine’ they had been together a few years but the relationship started to get stale.

One night the man went to a bar to get away from his wife and met a woman named “Clearly” they hit it off and went back to hers to have sex.

The man beco...

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A tall man walks into a bar, with a tiny man standing on his shoulder.

... and orders a beer. As soon as he sits down at the counter the tiny man hops off his shoulder and starts walking around. It is just a bit taller than a pint of beer, and dressed in a sports jersey. It walks over to the guy right to him, chugs his beer in one go, bumps his fist into the guys shoul...

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VA Governor Northam has not made a public appearance since Saturday

This is partly thanks to a tunnel system that connects his residence to his office. It is predicted that when he does resurface & sees his shadow, we are guaranteed 6 more weeks of scandals.

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An eighteen year old finally decides to throw out his toys.

Andrew was never fond of most of the toys in his collection. He was a professional gamer and had no time for real world items. One day, he decided that he needed to clear out his room and found all his old toys. Without a moment's notice, he placed the whole bag in the garbage bin outside his house....

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He grasped me firmly but gently just above my elbow and guided me into a room...


Then he quietly shut the door and we were alone.

He approached me soundlessly, from behind, and spoke in a low, reassuring voice close to my ear, “Just relax.”

Without warning, he reached d...

I love the look on people's faces, standing soaked in the rain at the bus stop as I drive past.

It's partly why I became a bus driver.

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One day Johnny walked into the classroom, and the teacher said, 'Johnny, do you have your report done?'

He replied, 'no ma'am.' She said, 'if you don't have it done by tomorrow then I'm going to make a call to your parents.'

As Johnny is walking home from school he looks to his left and sees two greyhounds racing,and one gets so far ahead of the other one that it just stops and the other one ra...

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As a hooker was dressing, she turned to her customer and asked.....

"Have you just gotten out of prison?"

"Yeah," the guy replied. "How did you guess? Is it because
I wanted to have sex from the rear?"

"Partly." She said. "But more because when we finished, you
ran around in front of me, bent over, and shouted, 'YOUR TURN.'"

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The Story of Jack

Jack was an Irish immigrant who came to America several years ago.

One day Jack goes to mow the lawn only to find the the lawn mower is broken. He tells his wife that he's going to billys house to ask if he can borrow his lawn mower.

"He wont lend ya the mower" says his wife.

English Weather

I just read something about weather in England:

The Archbishop of Canterbury and The Royal Commission for Political Correctness announced today that the climate in the UK should no longer be referred to as _'English Weather'._

In order to no longer offend a sizable portion of the UK po...

What is the Puerto Rican national anthem?

Partly in the USA
