Date: Sun, 9 Apr 2000 18:56:21 EDT From: Subject: Love Me 9 Disclaimer: still dont know them, but i will be seeing in concert this summer!!!!! anyway. thanks for all the feedback!!! If you ever wanna read some kick ass stories: Josh and Just hey AJ!! thanks for all the help ( and feedback!) :) Two out of Five Nick-Lance-and-JC Changes, Escape, and Choices Mirror Mirror What happened Set you free and Nick and Justin (just to name a few) plus u wanna read s'more of mine, Destiny and Forever in my Heart anyways, onto the story! Chapter 9 Britney watched the two young men from afar. She couldn't help but smile. Then she saw someone out of the corner of her eye. She watched as he rose from bed and began to near closer and closer to the front of the bus. She had to interfere. She ran to the bunks, purposely crashing into him. " Watch where you go Brit!" JC yelled out in surprise. " Sorry Josh." Eric and Justin parted ways. They had to be together, but they couldn't bare to leave their boyfriends. Neither of them wanted to cause pain or heartache. But being without each other would cause both. Eric walked to the bunks to see JC, and Justin to the kitchen to eat. Chris watched TV as Ruby slept next to him. She hadn't gotten very much sleep lately, and it showed in her work. She always got things done, that wasn't the problem, she was just beginning to not care. Chris didn't exactly know what was wrong. He suspected Eric would know, but Ruby insisted she was fine. Chris knew better. Chris watched as Eric walked by. He carefully got up to catch up to him. " Eric!" " Hey Chris, what's up?" " I need you help." " With what?" " Ruby?" " I don't follow?" " She is so sad, I don't know why though, if you do, please tell me." Eric stepped back and remembered what Jason had said in his dream. " Eric! Listen to me. You need to be strong. You've had all these months to sit and mourn. But Ruby is so close to breaking down. Watch over my sister. She was my everything. I will die a second time if this sadness tears her up inside." Eric looked past Chris and at his best friend, who was sleeping peacefully on the couch. He wanted to help her, but he didn't think that Chris was that person. " I'm sorry, I'm sure it's just the stress." " Yeah, okay, thanks." Eric hated lying. But he realized that he was living a lie, what was one more? Joey watched as Britney walked back to him. She was the epitome of Beautiful. He didn't understand how he had gotten to be so lucky. He still felt guilty over what happened. He didn't know how to not to. He watched as she sat across from him on the floor. She looked up at him and smiled. Joey watched as she laid back on the floor and tapped her fingers along with the music flowing into her ears. He smiled as he watched her. Her every move fascinated him. Britney could feel his eyes as they took in the sight of her. She smiled knowing even just her smile, made him happy. This was where she belonged. In a loving relationship. With someone who would to the ends of the earth for the other. She sat up to his eyes on her. She smiled at him as she switched CD's. " Hey Joe." " Hey Brit." " Whatcha up to?" " Nothing, just enjoying the scenery." Joey smiled as Britney giggled. " Oh really?" " Yup." Justin walked back to his bunk to get some sleep. He stopped by JC and Eric's to see if Eric was awake. He heard laughing. He stopped walking. His heart broke in two. Before he could run to his bunk, Eric climbed out of the bunk and bumped into the Justin. " Jus, what are you doing?" " Going to my bunk, to sleep." " Oh, okay." " Do you love him?" " What?" " Do you?" " A part if me does." " I see." " Well, you love Lance don't you?" " What?" " Don't you?" " I guess." " Yeah, well I should get back to Josh." " Yeah." Justin walked to his bunk and put in his Vertical Horizon CD. He switched to Love's Light and plugged in his speakers, so Eric could hear the song form JC's bed. " Well I know that no one is to blame But do you feel my strength when you call my name 'Cause I feel yours inside How could this be more right And I have traveled through my mind I've given all my dreams up to time Tell me what else can I do Well I'm nothing without you." Eric was shaken from his thoughts as the music drifted to his ears. He stiffened as he heard the words. He knew where they were coming from, and who they were coming from. " But you, you just don't know what to do I guess I'll have to lose my love for you These feelings cannot stay 'Cause I'm withering away I'm withering away Withering away." Justin sat back, and pressed repeat, he listened as he tried to imagine life without Eric, he couldn't. But at the same moment, a life with him seemed so out of reach. "And teardrops are all that I can give But do you really know what true love is Don't let it slip away This doesn't happen everyday And you'd have no problems without me So take this song as my apology But you have closed my eyes And love's light shall never rise." Eric slowly left the bunk and stood outside Justin's. He stood as the song played over and over again. "Shall never rise on me Shall never rise It shall never rise." Justin couldn't help his tears. They fell. He tried to wipe them away, but gave up as they continued to flow. He let his hand drop him his side, it landed outside of the curtain. "And I'm scared I'll never hold you again But I know that no one is to blame." ( Love's Light, written by Keith Kane, by Vertical Horizon.) Eric wanted so much to take his hand in his own, but he knew that he couldn't. They shared something so wonderful, but also something that would never be. He slowly climbed back into his own bunk, with JC, closed his eyes, and tried to block out the sounds of the music as they mixed with Justin's tears. As the bus pulled up in front of the hotel, the boys almost flew off the bus. Britney took her time, helping to pick up a few remaining pieces of trash and whatnot. Eric and Ruby were the last off the bus. " Rubes?" " Yeah?" " You okay?" " Why wouldn't I be?" " Chris was worried. I don't want anything bad to happen to you." " You're not making sense." " Sorry." " Chris was worried, why?" " For a reason that is unbeknownst to him." " Which would be?" " Your depression." " Don't start with that again, I'm fine." " No, baby, you're not." " I'm not? How so?" " You never got to mourn for Jase, and it's taken a toll on you." " Please! Give me a break, I mourned for my brother as much as the next person, just because I don't cry every fucking second doesn't mean I didn't mourn him!" Ruby screamed at Eric with force. Ruby collected her things and ran out of the bus. Eric followed her, but stayed ten steps back. She rushed into the hotel and brushed passed Chris. Eric stayed behind her, not talking to Chris either. Ruby turned as she got onto the elevator and tried to shut the doors on Eric. " Why are you ignoring this?" " I'm tired, Eric, please just shut up." " Look, as much as I don't want to say this, if you wont go to me, go to Chris." " What is your problem with him?" " Nothing, just, nothing. Look, you need to talk this out." " Talk what out?" " This. This anger, and sadness that is eating you up inside." Eric looked at his friend as she stared at the doors. He reached over to grab her hand. She violently pulled away. She turned to look at him. " Don't analyze me! You don't know anything about me!" The doors opened on their floor and Ruby marched out of the elevator and to her room. Eric stayed back and looked as his friend began to break down. Britney opened her room and found a single red rose waiting for her on her pillow. She walked to the bed and read the card. ' Britty, I love you. Love, Joseph.' Britney looked around her room. Joey was not there, but she felt him. She slowly put her bags down and changed into her sweats. She turned on the TV and flipped to MTV. " Hey everyone! I'm Carson and this is TRL!" " God help me for watching this shit." Britney muttered her distaste for Carson under her breath. " Today we have Christina Aguilera on the show, how are babe?" " I'm fine Carson." " Well, lets get started shall we? At number ten is-." Britney couldn't look at the screen anymore. She loved videos she just hated Carson. He was always sucking up to her and Christina. Moreover, he ALWAYS flirted beyond the nice point. Britney shook her head of thoughts of Carson. She un-muted the volume in time to see her own video come up at number two. Britney was bored. She wanted to call Joey, but she knew he had to rest before the show. She climbed into bed and turned on Rosie. She soon fell asleep. As soon as JC got to the room, he resumed sleeping. Eric understood he needed to be well rested for the show, but how much sleep does one person need? He decided to walk around the hotel. He took a key and left the room. Lance and Justin rested in their room. Lance looked at his boyfriend's tear stained face. Somewhere inside him, he knew what he was doing was wrong, but he didn't care. Justin turned over to face Lance. Lance's eyes were closed so he assumed he was sleeping. Justin wiped his face, grabbed his key, and left the room. Justin jogged down to the gift shop. He wanted to get a copy of the morning paper before going back upstairs. He picked up a coke on his way back to the papers. Lance opened his eyes about five minutes after Justin left. He quickly left the room and followed his boyfriend. Eric walked into the gift shop about two minutes after Justin did. He spotted him right away, its kind of hard not to notice Justin's hair. He slowly walked up to him. He checked to make sure no one was looking and slid his arms around Justin's waist. Justin jumped at the touch but soon relaxed. Eric pulled him close and rested his head on Justin's shoulder. Justin put the paper down, and closed his hands over Eric's. He hung his head as the tears flowed down his face. " Sh, baby it'll be okay." " I don't see how. JC is in love with you, and god only knows what goes on inside of Lance's head." " What do you want?" " I want you." " Then have me." " But-." " No buts, we have to make ourselves happy." " I don't want to hurt JC." " Neither do I." Justin turned into Eric's embrace. Justin bent his head down and rested his head on Eric's chest. " I wanna be with you." Justin cried out as Eric held him close. Lance stood a few feet away. He looked at the newly formed couple. He smiled. ~~~~~~~ Why the hell is Lance so damn happy? Beats the hell out of me!! lol Thanks for reading and supporting me! Please tell me what you think! thanks ~Elisheva I was thinking about adding Some BSBers ( or members of some other "boyband") into the story, I'm contemplating the idea. please let me know if this is a good or bad idea, or if you dont care, lol. thanks.