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Am I pushing my kid to hard?

Posted 10/10/2012
My ODD is in 1st grade. She is very intelligent and is one of the brightest kids in 1st grade. She does a special homework assignment each week because the teacher told me the regular assignments are too easy for her. ( 2 other kids in the class also do the assignment). All that said, sometimes she is lazy and careless.
While doing her assignment today she wrote the same sentence twice, misspelled simple words that I KNOW she knows, and then erased a whole sentence that she should have left. I told her to just pay attention and do it right or don't bother doing it at all because she was doing double work to make up for the mistakes at this point. She started crying and told me she just had too much to do. I want to push her to do her best but am I pushing too hard? She still gets 2 or 3 hours a day of unstructured play time to just be a kid but between word wall words, spelling words, reading logs, this special assignment, and reading each night we are doing 1 or 1.5 hours of homework 4 nights a week. How much is normal for a 1st grader?

I love my Brookie and Cheyenne!

Comments (14)

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Last edited 10/10/2012
Sounds like a normal amount of homework to me.

Are you sitting with her while she does the homework? Maybe just let her do the work independently then show her where the mistakes are.

Maybe you are putting too much pressure on her to be perfect?

If you think the work is too much for her, then tell the teacher. The teacher will understand!

3 crazy kids -12, 9, 6

Posted 10/10/2012

here is my 2 cents.

My odd is very bright - she could read at age 4.  teachers have always given her "special homework" in addition to her regular homework.

And in my experience this always backfires.  I have talked to her teachers saying basically extra homework does not fit her brightness, this just adds to her work load.

So the would give her "enrichment packets" instead that she could keep at her desk when she finished classwork.

Extra or special homework is not what bright students need, they need enrichment.  Why is it fair that she gets more homework because she is bright?

Posted 10/10/2012

1-1.5 hours seems like a lot for a 1st grader. I don't have any school age kids yet though, so maybe it is normal. I always heard 10 minutes per grade (ie 10 min in 1st, 20 min in 2nd).



Posted 10/10/2012

My first grader has about the same amount of homework 4 nights a week. I honestly think it is too much for a 6yr old. We don't get home until 5 and it's rush rush rush to get it all in. I had been feeling guilty and was having him have some down time, then dinner, then homework. But by the time hoemwork time rolled around he was way overtired from the entire day and would cry and get frustrated. I now let him have a half hour of playtime when we walk in the door, start homework (my goal is to get most or at least half done), then dinner and then finish up homework. So far things have gone a ton smoother since.



Mom to Justin class of 2024

Posted 10/10/2012

Thats a lot of work.  But also I would let her do it how she wants (erasing, making more work, not checking etc.) and let her find out the consequences on her own (after a gentle reminder).

Posted 10/10/2012
I work in an elementary school. Homework should be an easy review. No more than 30 minutes. I know sometimes reading takes a lot of time but if she is spending most of her one doing written assignments, I would cut the extra out. That's just me. I have 3 "advanced" boys that have gone through the same thing. We cut the extra out and it was much less stressful.
Posted 10/10/2012

 I think that is a lot for a first grader. My son is in first grade and has 15-20 min of homework mon-fri.


Proud Army wife and Mom of 2 boys and 2 girls

Posted 10/10/2012

Way to much for a first grader.  My 4th grader doesn't have that much!  And, I think additional homework to the smart kids always backfires.  It did with my odd and ds.  They need different assignments in the classroom (my kids both get different spelling words, for example).  But, extra work is just punishment for being smart.




Wine Hor Spice



Posted 10/10/2012
My ods is very bright as well. He also tends to be careless with his work. We are constantly telling him to think about what he is doing and check his work.
I think it's normal for very bright or gifted children to assume a task is too easy so they go through it too quickly.

Ods is in 3rd grade now and gets homework tailored to his needs. Does your school have a GATE program?


Carnival Christmas Spice

Posted 10/10/2012

I have an advanced 2nd grader.  Her first grade homework seemed to be about that amount, but it took her about 20 minutes at most to finish it.  I had her stop doing the reading log (extra work) because it was too much.  She had special spelling lists and assignments, but it really only took about 10 minutes a day to finish them usually and 10 minutes for the regular homework.  Then spelling test practice on Thursdays usually also took 10 minutes (we did a lot of review in the car if the words were tough that week).  I also don't make her read each night.  If we are running late, she skips it.  Because she is advanced, I'm not worried and I'm not rigid. 

My point is... if she is advanced, she should be breezing through the regular homework and spending her time on the challenging work. 




ODD 4/05, YDD 10/06, DS 8/09

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