


(68 Posts)
sillymoomoo Sat 13-Oct-12 20:31:58












UltraBOF Sun 14-Oct-12 00:03:16

You don't need to talk. He needs to keep pestering and belittling you, it seems, but you certainly don't need to indulge him.

ZillionChocolate Sun 14-Oct-12 00:46:53

You can be a real woman now you've stopped being a doormat. That may sound harsh, but honestly, you need a wake up call. You're grateful that he once cooked you an omelette when you were ill? It sounds like his contribution to your life was pitiful. If he was living with you part time, he should have been contributing equally when he was there. Doesn't really matter how, as long as you're both happy.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Sun 14-Oct-12 08:12:27

Don't talk to him. He sounds emotionally immature and inadequate. Don't let him drag you down any more

JeezyOrangePips Sun 14-Oct-12 08:22:25

I would re

JeezyOrangePips Sun 14-Oct-12 08:24:10

I would reply 'yes, I know what you are like, which is why I am not going to meet you tomorrow'

He is looking for a mother, not a wife.

WhenLifeGivesYouLemons Sun 14-Oct-12 09:59:53

I forgot to say in the previous post OP,

This is not the norm. I know of no other DP/ex-'D'P like this. Yes it's true that women do a disproportionate amount of the housework overall in society, but cleaning up piss from the toilet seat is stuff that most blokes grow out of in their toddler years.

I think when/if you find a new partner you'll quickly see how utterly unreasonable your ex-DP really is.

BertieBotts Sun 14-Oct-12 10:04:54
samandi Sun 14-Oct-12 10:04:58


Erm, no.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Sun 14-Oct-12 12:25:26

Exactly - WhenLifeGivesYouLemons

It's a sad fact that we sometimes don't see quite what a twat someone is until we meet someone who isn't a twat.

OP I wish I could introduce you to a my DDH. He's a real man - changes nappies, makes cakes, fixes thing, irons own shorts, treats women as equals etc etc. Prety basic stuff that's sadly lacking in some.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Sun 14-Oct-12 12:26:05

Sorry, the second DH was a typo. Not Dear Dear Husband - that's just silly

WhenLifeGivesYouLemons Sun 14-Oct-12 12:48:28


I hate showing off my awesome DH, but yesterday he very nicely let himself be kicked out of the house to get me some pudding cos I'm so pissed at being a day overdue with baby grin

There are some really nice partners out there that won't treat you like shit OP

EdithWeston Sun 14-Oct-12 12:56:07

I'd simply say "lucky escape". He doesn't sound remotely good enough for you (and your domestic standards are well above mine).

sillymoomoo Mon 15-Oct-12 10:12:09

To the pp who said I'm there to be blamed I think you're right. I've been having weird dreams lately. The one I had the other night ex and I had gone to a theme park that we go to every year to see fireworks, we lost eachother somehow and my phone wouldn't work to ring him, so he just left and got the train home without me, for some reason in my dream this meant that he had to leave his car, when I eventually got hold of him he wouldn't answer the phone (he's got a thing about not answering the phone when he's got a mood on) and put the train driver on the phone instead, and blamed me for him having to get the train and how awful it was for him, despite the fact that I was now stranded at the theme park in the midde of the night!

I know that's just a dream but I think it's telling how the relationship made me feel.

I didn't see him yesterday, he text a couple of times during the day saying if he's so bad why don't I go and find someone perfect with a perfect body, I said I don't care about perfect or bodies, I just want normal, he text last night though saying 'he knows we need to talk', but that right now he doesn't want to see me as he's angry and is in his own little world. I couldn't resist texting back saying 'ok fine', then he said 'no speak to me now, I want to talk, it might be another week now before I'm in the zone again'. Wtaf does that mean?

I wish I could understand what goes on in his mind. Believe it or not, when we were physically together, he acted pretty normal. confused

EldritchCleavage Mon 15-Oct-12 11:24:51

That was me-a woman's place is in the wrong, and all that. I think that dream's pretty telling.

So, it's over, he's bogged off, but you need to talk. No, he's too angry to see you (punishment tactic), but he demands you converse with him by 'phone, whether you feel like doing it or not. Lovely. Does this give you any hope that this relationship could improve?

Are you going to get back together with him? Because unless you are, you've really got no reason to put up with his text whining.

sillymoomoo Mon 15-Oct-12 11:47:04

No, not going to get back together.

And I've been trying to not engage in any kind of discussion with him, but fall silent for a few days and he starts. I'm my own worst enemy I think as I like things to make sense, and to me, his behaviour doesn't so still driving myself a bit mad trying to figure out what's going on in his head so end up answering.

So I'll get a few texts telling me how awful I am, then he'll say something like he knows he needs to change and how about we buy a house together instead of living seperately, as this would make him happy which is what he did this morning.

HecateLarpo Mon 15-Oct-12 12:00:59

WIFE DUTIES? <faints>

Oh you are well out of that one!

you must be properly trained in order to please the lord and master of the house.

Screw that.

EldritchCleavage Mon 15-Oct-12 12:07:30

You could block his number, I suppose.

MaBaya Mon 15-Oct-12 12:08:59

He sounds like a total arsehole. Ignore him.

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