'Money' fails to make sense
Tucker's talents wasted on silliness

The Cincinnati Enquirer

If money really could talk, it would scream ''Put me back in your pocket!'' when you try to buy a ticket for Money Talks.

Granted, this black-and-white buddy flick contains a few laughs, thanks to the flip, high-speed patter of co-star Chris Tucker (The Fifth Element).

But, his comic rants are nowhere near sturdy enough to hold up the rickety, hand-me-down contraption that fills the empty space where a plot belongs.

Mr. Tucker plays Franklin Hatchett, a small-time hustler who deals in stolen goods and scalps tickets for a living. Charlie Sheen plays James Russell, a failing television newsman who gets Franklin busted in a pathetic attempt to win ratings.

During a transfer of prisoners, Franklin is inexplicably spared when a mob of French commandos show up to liberate their leader (Gerard Ismael) by blowing up the jail bus and shooting all its occupants.

Franklin, wanted for murder and on the run, calls Russell, who idiotically decides to wait until after the weekend to turn the fugitive over to police. Again, the alleged motivation is ratings.

Instead of just stashing Franklin somewhere safe, Russell -- who is about to get married -- drags him along to the rehearsal dinner and convinces the wealthy in-laws that the black guy is Vic Damone's son.

That encounter inspires a few funny moments between Mr. Tucker and Paul Sorvino as the soon-to-be father-in-law.

But the movie quickly switches its attention to an absurd, overblown and grossly lethal shoot-out at Los Angeles Coliseum, involving the French commandos, good cops, bad cops, a loan shark's gang and a gun dealer toting a rocket launcher.

The combined effect of all this aimless action is not exciting, surprising, funny or stimulating. It's just tedious.

The Enquirer
Money Talks
1 Stars

(R, strong profanity, violence)
Charlie Sheen, Chris Tucker.
Brett Ratner.
92 minutes.
Playing at:
National Amusements, Danbarry Middletown, Oakley Drive-In, Cinema 10.