The question

Do Hollywood actresses dress like bag ladies?

One of the things I love most about working in fashion is the thought- provoking, positive and thoroughly modern views on the role of women in society that are regularly expressed by prominent figures in the industry. Valentino, the Italian fashion designer, this week spoke out about what can only be described as a global shame: the decline in sartorial standards among today's film stars.

As the multimillionaire yacht-loving designer put it, with consummate sensitivity, Cameron Diaz and Julia Roberts "look like bag ladies, like homeless people". They have been photographed, he pointed out, "running around", "looking unkempt", and even "wearing jogging bottoms".

Sadly, these shocking allegations are grounded in truth. These days, celebrities - even young female ones - are allowed to roam the streets chaperoned only by their chihuahuas. The lifestyle of the modern off-duty celebrity (a brace apiece of Hiltons and Olsens, Spears, Aniston, Zellweger), largely involves steering a huge SUV around Los Angeles and getting parking tickets at the gym. The uniform for this activity is a Juicy Couture tracksuit, Havaiana flipflops, accessorised with a Starbucks takeout skinny latte, a vastly expensive handbag and ridiculous sunglasses.

Now, true, I can't say I have personally ever seen a homeless person in Juicy Couture, let alone with a lapdog and a Jeep, but let's not quibble. Clearly, standards are slipping, and the golden era we need to emulate, as Valentino says, is Rome in the 60s, when "women had less to do and looked after their appearance. They changed their outfits two or three times a day or had a complicated hairstyle".

You see, Cammy, you need to drop this crazy notion that a 33-year-old woman can make her own mind up about what to wear. For a start, stop spending your leisure hours hanging out on beaches with gorgeous young pop stars, when you know full well that surfing makes your ponytail go all bumpy. Instead - for all our sakes - learn to do a chignon, swap the flipflops for kitten heels, and go pose by a stone fountain with your knees together.