Things you would like to be able to say in your professional life but really, really can't

(270 Posts)
Jacksmama Sat 16-Jan-10 18:52:50

To one client in particular: "please, PLEASE have a bath/ shower/at least wash your MINGING arse before you come in for a treatment!! I have to lean over you to treat your back and your down-below pongs so bad I almost gag every time I see you!!"

(Not like she has a health issue or anything btw, just unwashed. <boak>)

missmoopy Sat 16-Jan-10 18:59:42

"For fucks sake just stop"
"If you really give a shit about your kids stop now"
"Fuck off" shock

I am a drug counsellor working with heroin users.

JackBauer Sat 16-Jan-10 19:01:50

I worked in a government call centre.

Before you start laying abuse on me, just remember, I know where you fucking live.

PuppyMonkey Sat 16-Jan-10 19:02:42

I don't really even like EastEnders all that much.

missmoopy Sat 16-Jan-10 19:03:34

What exactly do you do PuppyMonkey?

choufleur Sat 16-Jan-10 19:03:47

To my boss. You're paid about £120k a year make a fucking decision and then stand by it. stop dithering, or at least if you can't make a decision then let the people who work for you make a decision and don't shout at them if it isn't what you wanted to do. you didn't tell us!

compo Sat 16-Jan-10 19:03:56

To my managers ' you are a bunch of unprofessional twits who get paid too much'

queenoftheslatterns Sat 16-Jan-10 19:04:32

i work for Iceland and want to shout:

"What the fuck are you doing feeding your poor kids this reconstituted shite, go to Asda and buy a real chicken ffs"

Caoimhe Sat 16-Jan-10 19:05:03

"You are here because of your OWN stupidity. It is no-one else's fault, just yours. And before you start reeling off your excuses bear in mind that I have heard it all before."

RonNumber Sat 16-Jan-10 19:05:06

lol at jack bauer

me( job 1)

" well you have enough money to SMOKE nad tattoo yourself wiht shit names dont you"



" of COURSE you never speed"

never feel like being unkind to pupils - they are adorable

RonNumber Sat 16-Jan-10 19:05:29

do i know you Qo s?

PuppyMonkey Sat 16-Jan-10 19:06:13

I write about telly for a local paper and I have to do a soap fan thing about EE.

NomDePlume Sat 16-Jan-10 19:09:20

"Just fuck off you annoying bunch of power mad twats"

RonNumber Sat 16-Jan-10 19:11:46

i had a convo recently about a fictional person.
the peopel i was talking it to were talking about them as if they were a real person.
it had me in fits afterwards.

Ronaldinhio Sat 16-Jan-10 19:12:09

yes, i do expect you to work whilst in work...this does not make me a cruel despot but at the moment you are so inactive that I'm unsure if you are currently in a p.v.s

snigger Sat 16-Jan-10 19:14:25

"If you can't buy nappies for your kids, and you can't feed them, perhaps a two-day delay in your so far life-long benefits is not the issue you should be addressing in a 10-minute foul-mouthed diatribe."

Also in a government call centre.

Wouldn't ever say it, and there are some people it doesn't apply to, but seriously, sometimes .....

KnightswhosayNi Sat 16-Jan-10 19:17:14

You dialled 999 and got yourself an emergency ambulance....FOR A FECKING PAPER CUT????? angry

RonNumber Sat 16-Jan-10 19:19:42

isnt it interesting how many of these repressed comments APPEAR to be to the ahem more financially challenged of society wink

smallorange Sat 16-Jan-10 19:22:10

Having to pick up the phone to nutcases while working on the newsdesk of a newspaper:

"yes I know you say you are not being racist but... But will you please stop bending my ear with this offensive drivel and go and watch jeremy Kyle in your underpants with all the other BNP voters."

" well it's great that your little girl has won a prize for ballroom dancing but I don't give a shit and neither do our readers.'

"it's brilliant that you you can pick up alien transmissions through your fillings, but how about telling your GP about it instead of me?"

MollyRoger Sat 16-Jan-10 19:24:37

Stop giving me 100 reasons why this won't work and that won't work and just try it....pleeeeeeeease!

MollyRoger Sat 16-Jan-10 19:26:45

smallorange - I too have spoken to that loon in my previous job and my current job (and my previous job was in local papers grin

NanBullen Sat 16-Jan-10 19:26:51

"I don't care if you don't need the loan/fee paying account, just take it because i get paid commission on every sale i make!" Oooh that's bad....blush

"No it isn't your money, it's an overdraft so it's the banks money now f off please!"

I'm a bad person....

Caoimhe Sat 16-Jan-10 19:27:22

"I am not a social worker nor am I your friend - stop telling me all your bloody problems. I DO NOT CARE!"

choufleur Sat 16-Jan-10 19:28:01

do you get a fed up with PRs smallorange?

differentID Sat 16-Jan-10 19:29:43

"don't drop the white dresses on the floor you fuckwit. they get dirty!"

"if you get curry sauce on that you're buying it"

"of course your pushchair is going to tip backwards when you seem to have half the stock of Tesco bagged up on it"

shall I continue?

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