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Inattentive and impulsive but not hyper?

Posted 09/30/2012

Is this a type? I always hear inattentive, hyper and impulsive, and combined. BUt while my 7 yr old DS is not hyper, he is impulsive, and innattentive(like in his own world sometimes, oblivious). He definitely has executive functioning issues but has no trouble with homework and not many issues in school. He has trouble "switching gears" and remembering what he should be doing. I guess I need to get him evaluated but none of his teachers has told me he is having trouble and needs this. We have trouble at home though and I'm noticing how different he is from his 4 yr old brother, who has no trouble following rules, calming down, remembering steps, etc. 

Does this sound like anyone else's child? 

Comments (6)

Posted 10/01/2012

when I hear that things happen at home but not at school, I first think that maybe things just need to be handled differently at home.  Not meaning you do anything wrong but maybe you need to do it differently for him.  Maybe you should find out what is working at school.  Is it possible that at home the problem is that he has too many distractions? TV? Games?  What kind of trouble do you have? what is he doing when you have the trouble?  Are you in the room with him when you ask him to do things?  what are you trying to calm him down from? 

And never compare kids.   There are so many reasons that your 4 year old might be better at following rules, calming down, and remembering steps --- reasons from your ODD might have ADHD or is more curious about everything going on around him, to reasons like your 4 yr old is just smarter or more mature.


* ADHD without meds ** Parents of TEENS with ADHD *
BCPAC - Parents of kids in the performing arts!

MayaPapaya+2 · Original Poster
Posted 10/02/2012

Thanks, Karen. I appreciate your insight. I know my 7 yr old is immature in certain things. He is also pretty oppositional and stubborn at times and has trouble doing what he is supposed to do. He really does think he should be in charge. I guess that's the most frustrating part. By calm down, I mean that after we are being silly, he has trouble switching to being calm. He often takes things too far, like wrestling with DH. 

We limit tv and video games so I dont think it's that. He has executive functioning issues like low frustration tolerance, trouble putting together past consequences/experience with planning for the future, mental flexibility, etc. I just dont know if that is what gets an ADHD diagnosis. Like, can you have these issues and not have adhd? I thought adhd was basically a problem with executive functioning. I know I'm rambling...I guess I should get him evaluated but without the school wanting me to, I just dont know. Maybe I should give him a couple years to mature. Ahhh! They need to come with manuals!

Posted 10/02/2012
A child does not have to be hyper to have ADD( attention defect disorder). The hyperactivity could also appear later on, or not. ADD/ADHD can look so different in different people, well, because it affects all people differently. The think with school is, he may really enjoy being at school. My DD is the same way. She really enjoys school work and the whole school environment. She thrives on a locked in schedule too, which I suck at providing for her, because I have ADD too!

Things to ask yourself: is he getting enough sleep? 10-12 hours. Is he eating too much junk? How long has he been showing symptoms? Most kids will show symptoms way before 7. Is something bothering him? If he has trouble with the things you mentioned at home, I guarantee the teacher is noticing things too, maybe subtle. I would request a conference with the teacher and tell her what you've said here. Then talk to your pedi about it. It never hurts to try just to comfort your own mind.

We don't use meds around here, but lord knows there are times when I just want to break down and swallow a pill. I will let DD decide if and when she wants to. She tried vyvanse and hated it, so did I. I hope you get it figured out. Best wishes to you and your son. Hugs!
Posted 10/03/2012

Yes, this sounds a bit like my DS.  He is easily frustrated.  He gets annoyed rather quickly.  He had some impulsivity in school last year (1st grade) with shouting out the answer and sometimes not following directions.  He has been at a new school for less than a month, so far he has recieved an "A" for behavior every day.  He generally does not have a problem with getting homework done.  At school he completes his work fast - too fast, sometimes making careless mistakes or not completly following directions.

At home, he often has a hard time listenting to my requests and with time management.  Today we woke up really late, but he still was diddling around not getting dressed.

He tends to take things to an extreme, if a kid doesn't play with him, that kid hates him.  If one bad thing happened it is the worst day ever.  I would say my biggest problem, is listening, and his negative attitude.  I'm not sure it is ADHD.


Happily Divorced Mama to a wonderful 9 year old DS

MayaPapaya+2 · Original Poster
Posted 10/03/2012

Same here, Tigger. Our biggest problem is in his attitude and not inattentiveness or lack of focus. He is also very dramatic and small things get a big reaction. He flies off the handle but then is fine within 2 minutes. I'm thankful he doesn't have extended freak outs but he is not open to problem solving- he just shuts down and will not talk. 

4XMama- I did talk with his teachers and they are very thoughtful and really seem to know him. They say he is a hard worker, he doesn't give up on difficult tasks. He's friendly and happy and helpful- and impulsive. But his teacher said "I don't want him to see himself as impulsive because that's not all he is. He is so much more than that." We talked a lot about his trouble transitioning from silly or loud to calm and they have helped him.

They dont see the bad attitude at school. He gets enough sleep, we eat a clean diet, he takes supps like fish oil and magnesium. He had no trouble in K- got 4 out of 5 for focus and behavior. In 1st grade his teacher said he talked a lot and wasn't working to his potential in writing but the way they were doing writing was hard for him. So even though he's smart, he had trouble with it. I just wondered if he would show more signs of issues when the work got harder. He's really smart and has so far, been above grade level in everything they did in class. BUt this year, his teachers dont have problems with his work so I dont know. Maybe he's just emotionally immature. gah! 

Posted 10/04/2012

I am new here but your post really struck a chord with me.  Your son sounds so much like by DD.  She is 11 (5th grade) and is not hyper but has lots of problems transitioning.  I didnt even realize how much until I read the part about your DS playing around with your DH.  Same thing happens here, she can't stop when we say enough is enough and it always ends in screaming and tears.  We were actually very surprised by her ADHD diagnosis as her teachers as never had a problem with her behavior.  Initiated testing on our own after issues with math and reading. 

I think testing would be in your DS's and your best interest so that you know and have answers.  Good luck!

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