If you are a kid living at the United States Air Force's Kadena Air Base in Okinawa, Japan, Santa Claus doesn't come in a sleigh and goes down chimneys. He uses a HH-60G Pave Hawk combat search and rescue helicopter.

And then descends to the ground using a fast-rope, saying ho-ho-ho. Or holy-f*ck-I'm-gonna-die-here, looking at the video. One of the two, anyway. [The Dew Line]