


Friday, January 1

Must-see TV ... David Tennant and Lindsay Duncan in Doctor Who.


Conrad Walters
December 31, 2009

The National Parks: America's Best Idea, ABC1, 6.05pm

Tonight's armchair travel heads to the US north-west and the lofty peak of McKinley. It is the highest point on the continent and was once said to be "cold as the heart of an elderly whore" but with a view that matched that from the windows of heaven.

The first claim to have reached the peak was debunked as a fabrication. Then four prospectors in an Alaskan bar forged through the snow to capture the "easier" north summit, before the south peak was finally conquered in 1913.

Then we plunge south to Utah and Bryce Canyon, which forms a natural amphitheatre of colourful spires called hoodoos. The maze of shapes led one wag to say: "It's a hell of a place to lose a cow."

From there, it's a short trip to the geologic wonder of the Grand Canyon, dubbed by America's first leader of the National Park Service, Stephen Mather, as "Beethoven's Ninth Symphony in stone and magic light".

This series excels for artful landscape cinematography, archival footage and compelling stories of human endeavour, all merged through lively writing.

Motorway Patrol, Nine, 7.30pm

Strictly for people who are too lazy to leave the cushiony goodness of their sofa to gawk at traffic accidents and swear at stupid drivers for themselves.

Rapid Response, Nine, 8pm

Marginally better than Motorway Patrol. The minuscule difference here is that these stories are positive rather than a broadcast of pointless incidents to feed off the humiliation of others. The problem, though, is that the drama squeezed from these potentially life-threatening incidents is so quickly resolved that any potential for storytelling is lost by an immediate resolution. They may all live happily ever after but this feels like the cheapest possible way to meet legislated quotas for Australian content.

Doctor Who: The Waters of Mars, ABC2, 8.30pm

If you're a tad dehydrated after your New Year's revelries and happen to be reading this on Mars, television's favourite doctor advises against drinking the water there. Seems a virus has infiltrated the filtering systems and a produces the most monstrous of headaches. But there's more at play in this episode than medical advice.

The time-travelling doctor has arrived at the Red Planet on a significant date in 2059AD when destiny looms. There he encounters a crew headed by the famed Captain Adelaide Brooke (Lindsay Duncan) and her deputy Ed Gold (Australian actor Peter O'Brien, last seen in an uncanny impersonation of George Freeman in Underbelly).

Normally, His Wizardness simply whisks hapless victims to safety but in this case the events that follow from the good captain's mission to colonise Mars are too important to tamper with.

The moral dilemma that stems from this notion lifts the episode beyond the usual sci-fi realms of lasers and computer graphics.

The doctor wrestles with knowing that whatever he does, some aspects of history are immutable and he can do no more than idly watch, powerless, as disaster unfolds.

On the other hand, if the last of the Time Lords cannot intervene, who can?

And what are the ramifications of disrupting time itself?

A must-see for fans but also a compelling episode for viewers who have struggled to see the attraction of the world's longest-running science-fiction series.

PAY TV by Brad Newsome

Ultimate Warrior: Pirate v Knight, BBC Knowledge, 5.40pm

The one everybody really wanted was pirate v ninja but the cowardly ninja squibbed it (he's appearing instead in Spartan v ninja at 4.55pm). This series is a ghoulish delight as ancient weapons nuts chop up gel dummies designed to mimic human flesh and bone. Trauma doctors then inspect the damage and explain how long the victim would be able to survive with, say, a spear through his liver or half his head taken off by a mace. Sensors inside the dummies record the force of the blows and all the data is fed through a computer program that works out who would win and with which of their weapons.

Andre Rieu Live in Australia, Ovation, 8.30pm

Not to be confused with the behind-the-scenes documentary series, this is the actual concert at Melbourne's Docklands stadium back in 2008. With some marvellous solo performances by Australian soprano Mirusia Louwerse and such Australian classics as Botany Bay, Waltzing Matilda and the Neighbours theme, even the most grudging viewer should be impressed.

Carnivale, Showcase, 8.30pm

Series two of HBO's supernatural Depression-era drama begins in ominous style. The radio sermons of Brother Justin Crowe (Clancy Brown) win him a couple of creepy new followers.

When news happens:
