That’s not going to get you a date


The scene: A local diner at breakfast this morning. I was sitting alone. Two middle aged men were at the table behind me.

Man one lets out a big belch.
Man two: Wooh, that stinks.
Man one: Straight from the bowels.
Man two: Would you do that on a date?
Man one: Yeah, why not? What are you going to do?
Man two: Excuse myself.
Man one: Not me.

Categories: Dating, Local news
Kristi Gustafson Barlette

6 Responses

  1. yertle the turtle says:

    eeeyyyuuuwww! Where have all the manners gone?!

  2. I taught a summer school English class a handful of years ago and there were these two girls who would belch all the time. One would always follow it up with the comment, “Better out than in, I always say.” If I to try to sneak one out in public that turns out to be louder than I anticipated, I’ll use that phrase.

  3. I have another burp story! I was sitting in a bar with a couple friends. It was early so people weren’t drunk yet. There were two women sitting in a booth behind us and I was hoping to catch their attention. One of my friends let out a loud belch. The women turned and the friend that burped said, “Damn, James! Use your manners,” or something similar. I was pretty mortified because I obviously looked like a crass fool to these women and they clearly weren’t going to talk to me. I tried to apologize and say that it was really my friend. They said that I shouldn’t apologize and they were impressed that I could burp like that. Long story short, they ended up hanging out with us for most of the night. So much for manners…

  4. ann says:

    Burping is fun. When I was 12 my best friend and I could waste a good 30 minutes burping.

    Hearing other people burp, especially a belch, is gross. Belch being with a fluid noise.

  5. Lee says:

    A burp is just a little gas that started from the heart…
    But had it gone the other way…well, you know!

  6. doodle says:

    I think it’s totally on how you can pull it off in the thick of the situation. If these guys were attractive and said something witty to pass it off or to make light of it, then maybe no harm no foul.

    However, if they look like lazy, schlumpy oafs or creepers, then it will be perceived quite differently.

    In this situation, the exchange wasn’t witty at all, so it seems a little gross. I’d probably be laughing AT them not with them…