Ari Gold: Let's hug it out, bitch.


Ari Gold: Call me Helen Keller because I'm a f***ing miracle worker!


Vince: [talking to Eric at a Hollywood party] Look at where we are. Did you ever think we'd have this?


Justine Chapin: [Justine and Vince are flirting in a club] You're gonna have to work for it.

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Vince: I got into this business so I wouldn't have to work.


Ari Gold: I thought you already were his manager, because believe me, I would not put up with this much sh** from anyone who wasn't.

Eric: Yeah, I know I am, but I want to do it for real, you know? I want to have the conversation, lock it in.

Ari Gold: So you come to me for advice. I'm gonna f***ing cry. All right, here's what you do. You deal with talent the same way that you deal with women. You have to make them believe that they need you more then you need them.

Eric: He doesn't need me that much.

Ari Gold: Of course he doesn't need you. You're f***ing worthless. I could get a million morons to come in here and do the job. That's not the point.

Eric: Then what is the point, Ari?

Ari Gold: The point is that he is an insecure f***, like all beautiful-but-handed-everything-on-a-silver-platter people. He doesn't trust anyone in this world but you. You've been born into royalty, baby. You know it. Now you just gotta be thankful and wear the crown.


Ari Gold: Listen, Lloyd, I want you to put all my files, folders, binders, *everything* into a box! If you find a used condom, an executioner's mask, and a f***ing spike paddle, don't think, just pack that bitch! Chop suey!


[Adam Davies reveals himself to be the traitor within Ari's coup d'etat]

Adam Davies: You should be a nicer person. Maybe then people wouldn't f*** you.

Ari Gold: You talked, Davies?

[Davies turns to leave]

Ari Gold: Hey, Adam.

Adam Davies: Yeah, Ari?

Ari Gold: Just so you know, your girlfriend, when she was in the mailroom, offered to blow me. True story.