When the family moves, don't ask kids to help pack

on August 28, 2009 at 7:27 AM, updated August 31, 2009 at 10:20 PM
Some valuables to be packed for the move.
We're moving into a brand new house this week. (It was built in 1914, but it's brand new to us.) The kids are excited because they're getting a bigger house with bigger, better bedrooms; a really cool basement; a yard and a neighborhood filled with new kids to meet.

And they don't have to lift a finger.

They SHOULD be included in the work allocation. It would be good for them--but not for me. What I've found is that it ultimately doesn't constitute "help," because "help" implies that things are made easier. Quite the opposite.

I did try to to involve them in packing up their rooms. We've lived in this house for five years and have many happy memories. I was hoping to give them a sense of closure.

But they'd rather watch television. Or play outside, or put packing tape over each others' mouths or jump up and down on swaths of bubble wrap. In fact, I think they'd rather do just about anything besides help. I tried as we went through their things to reminisce, but they couldn't hear it over their own whining.

Then they'd see the batches of things you think you're throwing away, and they start digging through it. "Why are you throwing out my science project that consists of 12 orange juice containers stapled together and scribbled on and wrapped in rubber bands?" "Why are you throwing away my Stegosaurus toy that only has 3 legs and whose face is melted off because I left it too close to the toaster?! That's my favorite toy!"

And in there, unfortunately, they'll find a lot more of their favorite things. That's because a "favorite" is defined as anything that is about to be discarded even if they haven't touched it in years. "Favorite" is a very fluid term in times of moving. Why are you throwing away my yo yo with no string? How come my bent rusty pogo stick with one handle missing is in the trash? Why did you put my bag of mismatched broken chess pieces in the recycling bin? If I was trying to throw it away, it was something that it was imperative that we keep.

Unfortunately, and to be fair, I can't lecture the kids much on the matter as I'm the world's worst packrat. Here are a few of the items I've come across while packing for this move and have opted not to throw away:

-A box of vacuum cleaner bags for a model of vacuum we no longer own.
-Two sets of training wheels that came off my kids' bikes some 3 years ago.
-A tin pot with holes poked in it that is fastened to a broomstick with duct tape.
-A manual pencil sharpener that is missing its hand crank.
-A box of college text books I've never looked at since college (and barely looked at when I was IN college.)
-An old globe with no stand whose western hemisphere is almost completely illegible from having sat for a long time in a puddle of some corrosive liquid.
-One pair of soiled garden gloves, both for the left hand.

So, yeah, maybe it's my fault. We had this little white box that has slots to help you organize your bills. A very handy item I'm not inclined to throw away. It has a drawer that I opened this morning to find what used to be, some years ago, a mozzarella cheese stick. THAT I threw away. Small victories. You have to celebrate them.
