Cup of tea









Marriage is a threering circus: Engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.

For Sale: Wedding dress, size 8. Worn once by mistake.

There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman: Before marriage and after marriage.

Why were hurricanes usually named after women? Because when they arrive, they're wet and wild, but when they go, they take your house and car



Reason Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder: All the DNA is the same.



Because they had no reservations at a busy restaurant, my elderly neighbor and his wife were told there would be a 45minute wait for a table. "Young man, we're both 90 years old," the husband said. "We may not have 45 minutes." They were seated immediately.


All eyes were on the radiant bride as her father escorted her down he aisle. They reached the altar and the waiting groom; the bride kissed her father and placed something in his hand. The guests in the front pews responded with ripples of laughter. Even the priest smiled broadly.




Artie said: "I would like them to say I was a wonderful husband, a fine spiritual leader, and a great family man." Eugene commented: "I would like them to say I was a wonderful teacher and servant of God who made a huge difference in people's lives." Al said: "I'd like them to say, "Look, he's moving!"




A man goes to a shrink and says, "Doctor, my wife is unfaithful to me. Every evening, she goes to Larry's bar and picks up men. In fact, she sleeps with anybody who asks her! I'm going crazy What do you think I should do?"






A week later the Rabbi calls the man and says, "Well, I spoke to your wife. I spoke to her on the phone for three hours. You want my advice?" The man said yes and the Rabbi! replied, "Take the poison."




It was a romantic full moon, when Huan Cho said "Hey baby, how about playing Weeweechu".


"Oh c'mon baby, lets you and I play Weeweechu. I love you and it's a perfect time," Huan Cho begged.



Jung Lee looked at Huan Cho and said, "Ok, we'll play Weeweechu".....






Huan Cho grabbed his guitar and both sang..... "Weeweechu a melly Christmas, Weeweechu a melly Christmas, Weeweechu a melly Christmas, and a happy New Year."

Why men don't write advice columns?

Dear Walter:

I hope you can help me here.








Mrs... Lisa

Dear Lisa:




I hope this helps.


My Friend Circle

Ballo Prasad Yadav came home from a secret two year mission only to find his wife, Rabri, with a new born baby. Furious, he was determined to track down the father to extract revenge.

"Was it my friend Banta", he demanded.

"No !" his weeping wife replied.

"Was it my friend Ramta then?" he asked.

"No !!!" she said even more upset.


"Don't you think I have any friends of my own?" Rabri snapped.

Men are like
















Cold water

A young man went to his grandfather's place to stay for the weekend.

He was sitting down to lunch when he noticed that the spoons and forks were encrusted in a thin filmy substance.

He asked his grandfather,"Are you sure you washed it properly?"

"As clean as cold water can get it" was the reply.

So the young man shrugged and started eating.

The next day at breakfast he noticed that the plates were dirty and grimy. It also smelled a bit like dog.

Are you sure you washed it properly?"

"Clean as cold water can get it" was the reply again.

The man, a bit suspicious for his health, looked at his grandfather, than at his plate and started eating.

As he was leaving, his grandfather's dog jumped out in front of him, growled and generally blocked him from going forward.

"Cold water, leave the poor boy alone!" shouted the old man from inside.

The Wood Cutter









Great Sayings On Marriage

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry.
That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.

David Bissonette


Sacha Gui try


Hemant Joshi





The great question.... Which I have not been able to answer... Is, "What does a woman want?

Sigmund Freud


Sam Kinison


James Holt McGavran


Patrick Murray




Henny Youngman


Rodney Dangerfield

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

Milton Berle

Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.


Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."



33 Facts about Guyz


2. Guys hate flirts.




6. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile.





11. Guys love their moms.






17. Like Eve, girls are guys' weaknesses.

18. Guys are very open about themselves.


20. Guys hate it when their clothes get dirty.. Even a small dot.




24. Guys keep secrets that girls tell them.

25. Guys think too much.

26. Guys fantasies are unlimited.






32. Guys hate girls who overreact.

33. Guys love you more than you love them IF they are serious in your relationships. Doesn't this all make sense?

Troubled Husband

Dear Mrs. Fenton,



We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment.



Mr. Wally
President and CEO

Wal-Mart Complaint Department
Mr. Bill Fenton

Complaints - 15 Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse/partner is shopping:

1. June 15:

2. July 2:
Set all the alarm clocks in Homewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7:

4. July 19:
Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in homewares..... And watched what happened.

5. August 4:

6. September 14:

7. September 15:

8. September 23:

9. October 4:

10. November 10:

11. December 3:

12. December 6:

13. December 18:

14. December 21:
(And; last, but not least!)
15. December 23:

Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character




'Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character' - Albert Einstein

Become a Lie Detector

Introduction to Detecting Lies:


Signs of Deception:

Body Language of Lies:

• Hands touching their face, throat &

Emotional Gestures & Contradiction

• Timing is off between emotions gestures/expression s and words. Example: Someone says "I
• Gestures/expression s don't match the verbal statement, such as frowning when saying "I love you."

Interactions and Reactions


Verbal Context and Content

• A liar will use your words to make answer a question. When asked, "Did you eat the last cookie?" The liar answers, "No, I did not eat the last cookie."
•A statement with a contraction is more likely to be truthful: " I didn't do it" instead of "I did not do it"
• The guilty person may speak more than natural, adding unnecessary details to convince you.... they are not comfortable with silence or pauses in the conversation.
words, his sentences will likely be muddled rather than emphasized

Other signs of a lie:

• Using humor or sarcasm to avoid a subject.

Final Notes:


Rabbit's Ph.D. Thesis

Fox "What are you working on?"
Rabbit "My thesis."
Fox "Hmmm. What's it about?"
Rabbit "Oh, I'm writing about how rabbits eat foxes." (incredulous pause)
Fox "That's ridiculous! Any fool knows that rabbits don't eat foxes."
Rabbit "Sure they do, and I can prove it. Come with me."

Wolf "What's that you're writing?"
Rabbit "I'm doing a thesis on how rabbits eat wolves." (loud guffaws)
Wolf "You don't expect to get such rubbish published, do you?"
Rabbit "No problem. Do you want to see why?"



The donkey

The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.


The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.


The next day the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES THE PASTOR'S ASS.



The Bishop fainted.





Alas... The Bishop was buried the next day.


Being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery and even shorten your life. So, be yourself and enjoy life. Stop worrying about everyone Else's ass and you'll live longer.

Laws of Life



Miller's Law of Insurance: Insurance covers everything except what happens.






Inspirational Quotes about Goals

Goals are not only absolutely necessary to motivate us. They are essential to really keep us alive." - - Robert H. Schuller "


"The tragedy of life doesn't lie in not reaching your goal.The tragedy lies in having no goals to reach." --Benjamin Mays

Set your goals high, and don't stop till you get there. -- Bo Jackson

You must have long term goals to keep you from being frustrated by short term failures. --Charles C. Noble

Goals determine what you're going to be. --Julius Erving

The most important thing about goals is having one. -- Geoffry F. Abert

Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goals. -- Sydney Smith

Goals are dreams with deadlines. -- Diana Scharf Hunt

If you don’t set goals for yourself, you are doomed to work to achieve the goals of someone else. -- Brian Tracy

A Potatoes Story












Moral of the Hatred (Human Vices) story:

Throw away any hatred for anyone from your heart so that you will not carry sins for a lifetime. Forgiving others is the best attitude to take. "Learn to Forgive and Forget."

Oh, Those Darn Lawyers





'And you're a liar, too!' Jon says. 'I'll have you know I've been STANDING on your ball for the last five minutes!'

Generation Gap


"You grew up in a different world, actually an almost primitive one !", the student said, loud enough for many of those nearby to hear.


...pausing to take another drink of beer.... The Senior took advantage of the break in the student's litany and said, "You're right, son. We didn't have those things when we were young, so we invented them. Now, you - arrogant little shit - what are you doing for the next generation?"



* Don't cry over anyone who won't cry over you.


* You can only go as far as you push.

* Actions speak louder than words.


* Don't let the past hold you back; you're missing the good stuff.





* True friendship never ends.

* Friends are forever.


* Don't frown. You never know who is falling in love with your smile.




ToTaL SiGnS oF fLiRtInG


1. She makes eye contact and smiles at you.


3. She flips her hair when she's talking to you.

4. She touches your arm when she talks to you.




8. She criticizes you on a girl you like.

9. You catch her staring at you.



12. She knows your phone number and address.



1. He stares at you a lot.

2. He hits you a lot. (just play hitting ).







9. You where invited by him to a group outing.

10. He called you to talk about nothing at all.

laugh even harder.

12. He remembers little things you mention in casual conversation.

13. He sometimes stares straight into your eyes.

Funniest Joke

Once Santa & Banta were traveling along with their friends Monty & Jaggi. On a road surrounded by forests on both sides, their car was attacked by robbers. Santa & his friends were pulled out of the car. The robbers blasted the car and took Santa, Banta and their friends in the middle of the forest where their boss was residing.

Now, this boss was fond of jokes. So, he put the condition that whoever tells a joke that makes every single person laugh should be left unharmed and alive, but if one single person doesn't laugh then the joke-teller would be shot to death.

Banta started telling the funniest joke he had ever heard, "One day........." and when he was finished, everybody were falling with laughter except Santa. So according to the vow, the boss shot poor Banta.

Now, it was the turn of Monty. He also told the best joke he had ever heard. Again everybody laughed including the boss & his robbers, but still Santa was quite as a statue. So the boss shot him.

Then came Jaggi. As he opened his mouth to tell the joke, Santa suddenly burst into laughter. Everyone was puzzled. Santa was laughing madly.

The boss asked him, "Why the hell are you laughing without hearing the joke?"

Santa said laughing and giggling, "Oh! How funny Banta's joke was!"

Quotes about Wives

Famous Quotes about Wives


David Bissonette



Sacha Guitry



Hemant Joshi









Sigmund Freud






Henny Youngman



Sam Kinison



James Holt McGavran



Patrick Murray


Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming

1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,

2. Whenever you're right, shut up.







Henny Youngman



Rodney Dangerfield


A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

Milton Berle


Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.







Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

Umbrella Thief



The woman started yelled, "Umbrella thief, Umbrella thief."



The lady commented, "Seems, you had a profitable day at work today."

The Mouse, the Frog, and the Hawk

A Mouse who always lived on the land, by an unlucky chance, formed an intimate acquaintance with a Frog, who lived, for the most part, in the water. One day, the Frog was intent on mischief. He tied the foot of the Mouse tightly to his own. Thus joined together, the Frog led his friend the Mouse to the meadow where they usually searched for food.

After this, he gradually led him towards the pond in which he lived, until reaching the banks of the water, he suddenly jumped in, dragging the Mouse with him. The Frog enjoyed the water amazingly, and swam croaking about, as if he had done a good deed.

The unhappy Mouse was soon sputtered and drowned in the water, and his poor dead body floating about on the surface. A Hawk observed the foating Mouse from the sky, and dove down and grabbed it with his talons, carrying it back to his nest.


MORAL : "Choose your allies carefully"

10 Reasons Why God Created Eve!
















The Emperor












If you plant honesty, you will reap trust.

If you plant goodness, you will reap friends.

If you plant humility, you will reap greatness.

If you plant perseverance, you will reap victory.

If you plant consideration, you will reap harmony.

If you plant hard work, you will reap success.

If you plant forgiveness, you will reap reconciliation.

If you plant openness, you will reap intimacy.

If you plant patience, you will reap improvements.

If you plant faith, you will reap miracles.


If you plant dishonesty, you will reap distrust.

If you plant selfishness, you will reap loneliness.

If you plant pride, you will reap destruction.

If you plant envy, you will reap trouble.

If you plant laziness, you will reap stagnation.

If you plant bitterness, you will reap isolation.

If you plant greed, you will reap loss.

If you plant gossip, you will reap enemies.

If you plant worries, you will reap wrinkles.

If you plant sin, you will reap guilt.



Beggars of today








"Four," the man replies.


Generation Gap





15 Pieces Of Advice For Woman















15. Sadly, all men are created equal!

New Recruitment


5000 candidates assembled in a large room. One candidate is Kantibhai Shah.


2000 people leave the room.



2000 people leave the room.



500 people leave the room.



498 people leave the room.

Kantibhai says to himself, ' I do not speak one word of Serbo - Croat but what do I have to lose?' So he stays and finds himself with one other candidate. Everyone else has gone.


Calmly, Kantibhai turns to the other candidate and says 'Kem Chho'

The other candidate answers 'Ek Dam Majama'

Rescue at Sea

(story) - Rescue at Sea

Years ago, in a small fishing village in Holland, a young boy taught the world about the rewards of unselfish service. Because the entire village revolved around the fishing industry, a volunteer rescue team was needed in cases of emergency. One night the winds raged, the clouds burst and a gale force storm capsized a fishing boat at sea. Stranded and in trouble, the crew sent out the S.O.S. The captain of the rescue rowboat team sounded the alarm and the villagers assembled in the town square overlooking the bay. While the team launched their rowboat and fought their way through the wild waves, the villagers waited restlessly on the beach, holding lanterns to light the way back.

An hour later, the rescue boat reappeared through the fog and the cheering villagers ran to greet them. Falling exhausted on the sand, the volunteers reported that the rescue boat could not hold any more passengers and they had to leave one man behind. Even one more passenger would have surely capsized the rescue boat and all would have been lost.

Frantically, the captain called for another volunteer team to go after the lone survivor. Sixteen-year-old Hans stepped forward. His mother grabbed his arm, pleading, "Please don’t go. Your father died in a shipwreck 10 years ago and your older brother, Paul, has been lost at sea for three weeks. Hans, you are all I have left."

Hans replied, "Mother, I have to go. What if everyone said, ‘I can’t go, let someone else do it?’ Mother, this time I have to do my duty. When the call for service comes, we all need to take our turn and do our part." Hans kissed his mother, joined the team and disappeared into the night.

Another hour passed, which seemed to Hans’ mother like an eternity. Finally, the rescue boat darted through the fog with Hans standing up in the bow. Cupping his hands, the captain called, "Did you find the lost man?" Barely able to contain himself, Hans excitedly yelled back, "Yes, we found him. Tell my mother it’s my older brother, Paul!"

The problems of "HE" and "SHE"..

(story) - The problems of "HE" and "SHE"..

The problems with "HE" as thought by "SHE"

If u Don't, he says u are PROUD.

If u Don't, he says u are from VILLAGE.

If u ARGUE with him, he says u are STUBBORN ;
If u keep QUIET, he says u have no BRAINS .

If u are SMARTER than him, he'll lose FACE;
If he's Smarter than u, he is GREAT.

If u don't Love him, he tries to POSSESS u;

If u DO!! He says u are CHEAP.

If u DON'T, he says that u don't TRUST him.


If u BREAK your PROMISE, u Cannot be TRUSTED;
If he BREAKS his, he is FORCED to do so.

If u SMOKE, u are BAD girl;

If he does WELL, it's BRAIN.

If u HURT him, u are CRUEL;
If he HURTS u, u are too SENSITIVE!!

The Rib

(story) - The Rib

A girl in love asked her boyfriend.


Boy: You, of course!

Girl: In your heart, what am I to you?


After their wedding, the couple had a sweet and happy life for a while.However, the youthful couple began to drift apart due to the busy schedule of life and the never-ending worries of daily problems, their life became mundane.All the challenges posed by the harsh realities of life began to gnaw away their dreams and love for each other. The couple began to have more quarrels and each quarrel became more heated.


Five years went by...

He never remarried but he had tried to find out about her life indirectly. She had left the country and back. She had married a foreigner and divorced. He felt anguished that she never waited for him.In the dark and lonely night, he lit his cigarette and felt the lingering ache in his heart. He couldn't bring himself to admit that he was missing her.



Boy: No.



With a smile, she turned around and waved good bye.

Good bye...

One week later, he heard of her death. She had perished in New York, in the event that shocked the world.Midnight, once again, he lit his cigarette. And like before, he felt the lingering ache in his heart. He finally knew. She was the missing rib that he had carelessly broken.

The Best 50 of Murphy's Law

(The Best 50 of Murphy's Law)


Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence..

Whenever a system becomes completely defined, some damn fool



If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs,

then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization.






All great discoveries are made by mistake.

Always draw your curves, then plot your reading.

Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.

All's well that ends.


The first myth of management is that it exists.


New systems generate new problems.


We don't know one millionth of one percent about anything.

Any given program, when running, is obsolete.

Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.









which are unobtainable and three parts which are still under development.



Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable.

Any system which depends on human reliability is unreliable.




If you can't understand it, it is intuitively obvious.


In designing any type of construction, no overall dimension can be totalled correctly after 4:30 p.m. On Friday.

The correct total will become self-evident at 8:15 a.m. On Monday.


All things are possible except skiing through a revolving door.

The only perfect science is hind-sight.

Work smarder and not harder and be careful of yor speling.

If it's not in the computer, it doesn't exist.

If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.

When all else fails, read the instructions.


Everything that goes up must come down.

Any instrument when dropped will roll into the least accessible corner.

Any simple theory will be worded in the most complicated way.




A Letter To God

(A Letter To God)




Girls vs. Grown Women

(Girls vs. Grown Women)


Girls want to control the man in their life.

Girls check you for not calling them.
Grown women are too busy to realize you hadn't.

Girls are afraid to be alone.

Girls ignore the good guys.
Grown women ignore the bad guys.

Girls make you come home.
Grown women make you want to come home.


Girls try to monopolize all their man's time ( I.e., don't want him hanging with his friends).

Girls think a guy crying is weak.
Grown women offer their shoulder and a tissue.


Grown women know that that was just one man.


Girls will read this and get an attitude.
Grown women will read this and pass it on to other Grown women and their male friends".

Signs your mate is cheating

(Signs your mate is cheating)

Working a Lot of Overtime: this enables them to meet their lover after work

Excessive Use of the Internet: a way for men to meet other women in chat rooms.

Hiding the Cell Phone Bill: the #1 way to find out who the lover is.

Saying, "It's Your Imagination": this is what is told to you when you're too close to the truth.

Receiving Hang Up Phone Calls: the paramour calling your house to speak with your mate, or the signal used when she's trying to get in touch with him.

No Longer Interested in Sex: saving their emotion for their lover.

No Longer Wearing Wedding Ring: a sign telling everyone "I am single."

New Sexual Techniques: what your spouse learned from their lover.

Saying "I Need My Space": when your spouse moves to the next stage of taking his/ her affair more seriously.

Super Computer




"Where is my father?" he asked.


On it were printed the words: Fishing off Goa.

Clever Guest laughed.





Why Girl Glad to be a Girl !

* They got off the Titanic first.

* There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.


* They don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.


* Their boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.

* Men die earlier, so They get to cash in on the life insurance.

* Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... ( You got the point? ).

* They can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.

* They can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay!

* They can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.

* They never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there

6 Way to People Likes U

Principle 1: Become genuinely interested in other people.

A simple way to make a good impression.
The expression one wears on one's face if far more important than the clothes one wears on one's back. Actions speak louder than words, and a smile says, " I like you. You make me happy. I am glad to see you." You must have a good time meeting people i f you expect them to have a good time meeting you. You don't feel like smiling? Then what? Two things. First, force yourself to smile. If you are alone, force yourself to whistle or hum a tune or sing. Act as if you were already happy, and that will tend to make you happy. "Action seems to follow feeling, but really action and feeling go together; and by regulating the action, which is under the more direct control of the will, we can indirectly regulate the feeling, which is not." -William James. Happiness doesn't depend on outward conditions. It depends on inner conditions. It isn't what you have or who you are or where you are or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about it. "There is nothing either good or bad," said Shakespeare, "but thinking makes it so." Your smile is a messenger of your good will. Your smile brightens the lives of all who see it. To someone who has seen a dozen people frown, scowl or turn their faces away, your smile is like the sun breaking through the clouds.

Principle 2: Smile. If you don't do this, you are headed for trouble

The average person is more interested in his or her own name than all the other names on earth put together. Remember that name and call it easily, and you have paid a subtle and very effective compliment. But forget it or misspell it-and you have plac e yourself at a sharp disadvantage. Whenever you meet a new acquaintance, find out his or her complete name and some facts about his or her family, business or political opinions. Fix all these facts well in mind as part of the picture, and the next time you meet that person, even if it was a year later, you will be able to shake hands, inquire after the family, and ask about the hollyhocks in the backyard. Sometimes it is difficult to remember a name, particularly if it is hard to pronounce. Rather than even try to learn it, many people ignore it or call the person by an easy nickname. Most people don't remember names, for the simple reason that they don't take the time and energy necessary to concentrate and repeat and fix names indelibly in their minds. If you don't hear the name distinctly say excuse me I didn't get your name clearly. Then, if it is an unusual name, ask how it is spelled. Use the person's name several times in the conversation; try to associate it in your mind with the person's featur es, expression and general appearance. Then, when you are alone write the name down on a piece of paper, look at it, and concentrate on it, fix it securely in your mind, in this way you will gain an eye impression of the name as well as an ear impression.


sound in any language. An easy way to become a good conversationalist
Listen intently; listen because you are genuinely interested. That kind of listening is one of the highest compliments we can pay anyone. The chronic kicker, even the most violent critic, will frequently soften and be subdued in the presence of a patient, sympathetic listener-a listener who will be silent with the irate fault-finger dilates like a king cobra and spews the poison out of his system. Be more eager to hear what a person has to say then even they are to tell it. Many people prefer good list eners to good talkers, but the ability to listen seems rarer than almost any other good trait. All we want when we are in trouble is a friendly, sympathetic listener to unburden yourself. That is frequently all the irritated customer wants, and the dissat isfied employee or the hurt friend. If you want to know how to make people shun you and laugh at you behind your back and even despise you, here is the recipe: Never listen to anyone for long. Talk incessantly about yourself. If you have an idea while the other person is talking, don't wait for him or her to finish: bust right in and interrupt in the middle of a sentence. If you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener. To be interesting, be interested. Ask questions that other persons will enjoy answering. Encourage them to talk about themselves and their accomplishments.

Principle 4: Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves... How to interest people

The royal road to a person's heart is to talk about the things he or she treasures most. Make an effort to find out what interests the person then get them talking about it. Talking in terms of the other person's interests pays off for both parties. When asked what reward he got from it, Mr. Herzig responded that he not only received a different reward from each person but that in general the reward had been an enlargement of his life each time he spoke to someone.

Principle 5: Talk in terms of the other person's interests. How to make people like you instantly.

Ask yourself " What is there about him or her that I can honestly admire?" That is sometimes a hard question to answer, especially with strangers. You want approval of those with whom you come in contact. You want recognition of your true worth. You want a feeling that your are important in our little world. You don't want to listen to cheap, insincere flattery, but you do crave sincere appreciation. So let's obey the Golden Rule, and give unto others what we would have others give unto us. How? When? Where? The answer is all the time, everywhere. Use little phrases such as "I'm sorry to trouble you, ___." "Would you please ___?" "Won't you please?" "Would you mind?" "Thank you." The unvarnished truth is that almost all the people you meet feel themselves superior to you in some way, and a sure way to their hearts is to let them realize in some subtle way that you recognize their importance, and recognize it sincerely. Talk to people about themselves and they will listen for hours.


In a Nutshell: Six ways to make people like you Become genuinely interested in other people.
Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
Talk in terms of the other person's interests.
Make the other person feel important-and do it sincerely.

Dear Dad , .....


Dear Dad,





Your loving daughter,





I love you!

Your loving daughter,

Different types of Man

Men are of different types

Some Examples -

INTERNET man - Man of difficult access

SERVER man - Always busy when you need him






RAM man - he forgets everything you say when you disconnect him

HARD DISK man - he remembers everything forever

MULTIMEDIA man - he makes horrible things look beautiful


CD-ROM man - he is always faster and faster

Contradictory proverbs

Contradictory proverbs....Interesting !

Every Action has an equal and an opposite reaction.


U be the judge..

All good things come to those who wait.
Time and tide wait for no man.

The pen is mightier than the sword.
Actions speak louder than words.

Wise men think alike.
Fools seldom differ.

The best things in life are free things..
There's no such thing as a free lunch.

Slow and steady wins the race.
Time waits for no man.

Look before you leap.
Strike while the iron is hot.

Do it well, or not at all.
Half a loaf is better than none.

Birds of a feather flock together.
Opposites attract.

Don't cross your bridges before you come to them.
Forewarned is forearmed.

Doubt is the beginning of wisdom.
Faith will move mountains.

Great starts make great finishes.
It ain't over 'till it's over.

Practice makes perfect.
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

Silence is golden.
The squeaky wheel gets the grease.

You're never too old to learn.
You can't teach an old dog new tricks

What's good for the goose is good for the gander.
One man's food is another man's poison.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Out of sight, out of mind.

Too many cooks spoil the broth.
Many hands make light work.

Hold fast to the words of your ancestors.
Wise men make proverbs and fools repeat them.

Why English Is So Difficult

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes;

but the plural of ox became oxen not oxes.

One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,

yet the plural of moose should never be meese.


yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,

why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?

If I spoke of my foot and show you my feet,


If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,

why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and three would be those,

yet hat in the plural would never be hose,

and the plural of cat is cats, not cose.

We speak of a brother and also of brethren,

but though we say mother we never say methren.

Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,

but imagine the feminine, she, shis and shim.


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The Master

When one Guru was dying, one of his deciple asked him "Guruji, who was your master?"He said, "I had thousands of masters. If I just relate their names it will take months, years and it is too late. But three masters I will certainly tell you about.

One was a thief. Once I got lost in the desert, and when I reached a village it was very late, everything was closed. But at last I found one man who was trying to make a hole in t he wall of a house. I asked him where I could stay and he said 'At this time of night it will be difficult, but you can say with me - if you can stay with a thief'.And the man was so beautiful. I stayed for one month! And each night he would say to me, 'Now I am going to my work. You rest, you pray.' When he came back I would ask 'Could you get anything?' He would say, 'Not tonight. But tomorrow I will try again, God willing.' He was never in a state of hopelessness, he was always happy.

When I was meditating and meditating for years on end and nothing was happening, many times the moment came when I was so desperate, so hopeless,that I thought to stop all this nonsense. And suddenly I would remember the thief who would say every night, 'God willing, tomorrow it is going to happen.'

And my second master was a dog. I was going to the river, thirsty and a dog came. He was also thirsty. He looked into the river, he saw another dog there -- his own image -- and became afraid. He would bard and run away, but his thirst was so much that he would come back. Finally, despite his fear, he just jumped into the water, and the image disappeared. And I knew that a message had come to me from God: one has to jump in spite of all fears.


'Just joking,' I asked the boy, 'Have you lit the candle yourself?' He said,

'Yes sir.' And I asked, 'There was a moment when the candle was unlit, then there was a moment when the candle was lit. Can you show me the source from which the light came?' And the boy laughed, blew out the candle, and said, 'Now you have seen the light going. Where has it gone? You will tell me!'

My ego was shattered, my whole knowledge was shattered. And that moment I felt my own stupidity. Since then I dropped all my knowledgeability.

It is true that I had no master. That does not mean that I was not a disciple

-- I accepted the whole existence as my master. My Disciplehood was a greater involvement than yours is. I trusted the clouds, the trees. I trusted existence as such. I had no master because I had millions of masters I learned from every possible source. To be a disciple is a must on the path. What does it mean to be a disciple? It means to be able to learn. To be available to learn to be vulnerable to existence. With a master you start learning to learn.


Before & After Marriage

Before Marriage


She: Do you want me to leave?

He: NO! Don't even think about it.

She: Do you love me?

He: Of course! Over and over!

She: Have you ever cheated on me?

He: NO! Why are you even asking?

She: Will you kiss me?

He: Every chance I get!

She: Will you hit me?


She: Can I trust you?

He: Yes.

She: Darling!

After marriage...
Simply read from bottom to top.

The Dreams














One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.


Some humorus sign ads









Behind Every Great Man, There Is A Surprised Woman.

The Reason Men Lie Is Because Women Ask So Many Questions.

Getting Caught Is The Mother Of Invention.








A guy walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I want you to give me 12-year scotch, and don`t try to fool me because I can tell the difference."


The bartender tries once more with 8-year scotch. The man takes a sip, grimaces and says, "Bartender, I don`t want 8-year scotch like this filth. Give me 12-year scotch!"

Impressed, the bartender gets the 12-year scotch, the man takes a sip and sighs, "Ah, now that`s the real thing."

A disgusting, grimy, stinking drunk has been watching all this with great interest. He stumbles over and sets a glass down in front of the man and says, "Hey, I think that`s really far out what you can do. Try this one."


The drunk`s eyes light up and he says, "Yeah, now how old am I?"

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