Festival Survival Guide

Top 5 festival survival tips. It’s a jungle out there!

1. Prepare for the weather

The weather in the UK is far from predicable, but try to prepare for the conditions as much as you can. If it’s hot and sunny (let’s hope so!) then use plenty of sunscreen as you’re likely to be out in the sun all day with little shelter. If it’s looking like wet weather then pack accordingly, mud's fun for about 10 minutes before it rapidly turns to misery, so don’t let it get any worse and stay dry and warm. Try to avoid those shitty pop up tents as they don’t tend to cope well if the rain is more than drizzle. Get a proper tent and you might get a few camps out of it. Check out our kit guide for some ideas.


2. Booze

It’s unlikely that you’re going to make it through the weekend without a little over consumption of one sort or another. When it comes to alcohol there are a few pointers worth mentioning from someone who’s ignored most of these types of top tip features in the past and paid the price! You’re going to be drinking a lot more than usual over much longer periods so pace yourself. You don’t want to be that twat who’s lying in their own sick at 11am having peaked too early. It’s not a race to the red cross tent, so don’t over do it. You’ve not suddenly discovered a secret to consuming limitless alcohol units and if you over do it it’s only going to end up badly for you. Drink plenty of water and try to eat regularly.


3. Drugs

We don’t condone illegal activities, but we do realise that festivals and drug consumption go hand in hand for many revellers. There have been enough deaths at UK festivals to make a BIG point about staying safe and managing your risks if you are going to participate in any substances. Here are a few specific pointers. 1. Cocaine is very unlikely to be cocaine at a festival, supply and demand dictates that what ever you buy is more likely to be mixed with shit you really don’t want to put up your nose so unless you are sure of the source and quality I would suggest saving your money. 2. Pills or MDMA powder, again the quality of anything sold at a festival will be of questionable quality and don’t take anything unless your sure of what’s in it. I really would suggest sticking clear of any Class A drugs at festivals but if you really have to get fucked up, then make sure you get your shit tested. There are more and more festivals having drug testing on site “The Loop” is a charity who you may have seen at Kendal Calling and The Secret Garden Party last year. After the positive feedback more festivals are partnering with them to offer free, anonymous drug testing. This includes one of my favourite festivals, Boomtown Fair. You can read more about it here http://www.boomtownfair.co.uk/info/drugs-and-safety/.


4. Sex

If the tents rocking don’t come knocking! With all the drugs and alcohol flying around, it’s even more important to stay safe if you’re planning any tent action. The normal rules apply to stay safe, so use protection, and be sure that everyone involved is on the same page and capable of making informed decisions about what they want or don’t want to do. The statistics of rape at UK festivals is staggering and this is certainly no coincidence that drug and alcohol consumption are common contributors to this.


5. Be a good festival citizen

Again this shouldn’t need to be said. But be nice to each other. Festivals can be some of the most positive hedonistic experiences providing you don’t get too carried away. Don’t be “that” person who I’m sure you’ve all met... 

Stereotype 1. The angry pissed twat (Don't be that shouty person trying to cause a drama)

Stereotype 2. The sick dwelling drunk (Once you've reached stage 1 of the angry pissed twat, stereotype 2 is only a few steps away) 

Stereotype 3. The emotional wreck (Don't do the crime if you can't do the time, we don't need to put up with your dramatic hangover or comedown so sort it out and stop shitting on our good vibe)

Stereotype 4. The litter dropping, tent dumper (Find a fucking bin and take your shit home with you, simple!)

Stereotype 5. the gurning twat (If you get to this one, you will probably be blissfully unaware of the fact that you're still dancing despite the music having stopped hours ago. Don't over do it!)

If you can avoid all of these you should be ok!

If you are in a group then make sure that you look out for one another, and if you see someone having a bad time try help them out.

Have fun and stay safe.