this is why i can’t have any friends.

I’m so tired of being harassed since the nightmare of our US election. People have been losing their shit with me because I think things like, if three different states show via recount that they all voted for the wrong candidate, I will go from sad to suicidal. Or if the electoral college denies the vote of Trump supporters, who clearly won by the rules of the election, I will go from sad to suicidal.

One woman who I’ve been blog-friends with for 8 years, to the extent that that is a thing (okay, a-ha moment, it is not a thing!),  straight up called me a KKK apologist, and a woman who I personally know lost her shit with me, personally, because I called her idea that the electoral college was somehow going to elect Mitt Romney to the presidency an elitist conspiracy theory (and from what I just read, it’s John Kasich, anyway).

I think that I’ve always been drawn to liberalism, in part, because as a child I thought “liberal” meant “open-minded”.  But if liberal means what I have felt compelled to become in the past few weeks, it means being an unfollowing-you, unfriending-you sack of intolerance for your intolerance.

And besides, social media is a bizarre and doomed experiment in which we track the lives of people we barely know in lieu of investing more fully in our own–perhaps because we are all ultimately sad and pathetic and doomed to death (and in these ways, probably no different than anyone else before social media or after).

But until whichever doomsday comes first, I have fled here, where I can write whatever I want and moderate the comments. I plan to blog a lot about writing–I’m writing the first draft of a dystopian fiction novel and I might even post some excerpts here to get some feedback. I’m also a stay-at-home mom of a new-to-the-Earth tiny human. I like to cook. I like to read. I’m married. Sometimes I’m a smashing success and sometimes I’m a total disaster at anything and everything I ever try to do. So, I’m really just going to blog about whatever the f*** I want.

The only thing I promise not to blog about is how you need to think, feel or talk about anything. I offer my opinions as food for thought, with my own struggling awareness that I don’t actually know everything. In turn, all opinions are welcome here, except the opinion that I’d see things your way if only I were as enlightened as you are.

8 thoughts on “this is why i can’t have any friends.

  1. Adam Frank says:

    “… I called her idea that the electoral college was somehow going to elect Mitt Romney to the presidency an elitist conspiracy theory …” This seems like simultaneously a complaint about how you will get attacked with vitriol if you expresses unpopular opinions, and also about you being a bit vitriolic in bashing other people’s ideas. Maybe your vitriol is less, and maybe it’s more composed, than what you describe from other people, but it’s still there.

    In all honesty the Mitt Romney theory seems wrong, likely misguided, and possibly even silly. I don’t know the details of what information she’s looking at to reach that conclusion, but it smells of not great information. But I wouldn’t tell her that in aggressive or insulting terms if I could initially avoid it, because it’s rude and will only likely lead to embattled sides. For the same reason, she shouldn’t have lost her shit with you.

    Anyway, from my perspective, if the recount flipped the electoral result or if the electoral college didn’t elect Trump, I’d say we dodged a bullet–which might be more than just a metaphor, we’ll see–through legal means. I don’t think it’s likely, but if we wake up in the middle of some miracle after these months of nightmare, I’ll sleep a little better. Without something like that, I see us on a path to war, possibly foreign, possibly domestic.


  2. Linda Bunner says:

    Fencing might be safer than sparring with words these days. I think I am going to need writers to diagram their theories like a flow chart that starts with verifiable facts–if they exist. Many Americans are passionately opinionated. We don’t like to believe that we can be persuaded and sometimes led down a path based on false assumptions. As someone who knows this blogger quite well, let me assure others that she is not a sympathizer with racists! I look forward to reading her discoveries and thoughts. Is civil debate a lost art? Did it ever truly exist? ( A mountaineer would just mutter the word “hogwash” and walk away from ridiculous rhetoric, and get back to doing something productive. ) I did think the phrase “sack of intolerance for intolerance” was a knock-out punch, making much more entertaining reading than would a calm report of a disagreement.


  3. Joan Gray says:

    Christy, I haven’t really had a dog in this fight, but in defense of my daughter, weren’t you inferring that she was one of the “less enlightened”? As a true mountaineer, I say ” hogwash” –


    • christyhelzner says:

      Joan, yes, and it was that interaction, in part, that led me to realize I was wrong. My attempt to evolve is actually what led to the above interactions. (although, in fairness, Amy did say she voted for Trump because she hated Hillary’s pantsuits…which is, of course, her right.)


  4. Joan Gray says:

    Thanks for your response. And you do need to lighten up! The pants suit comment was a joke. So are the pants suits ! Love to you and yours. PS. You sound very much like your Uncle John !


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