How Many Dates Before A Relationship? Here's What You Need To Know

How Many Dates Before A Relationship? Here’s What You Need To Know

attractive couple on a date

We've all heard those adorable stories about our grandparents meeting on a train and falling madly in love at first sight. How many dates before relationship was a question they never really considered.

Nowadays, dating is more difficult. We simply have many more choices when it comes to love and everything else, and we're used to processing a ton of information on a daily basis. That's why even dating has become complicated.

We don't want to rush into something fast and then realize there was a better option on the table. But then we risk losing a cool guy because we waited too long to commit.

It seems like dating has turned into a game we can't win. Sometimes we can't even tell if a guy likes us or not

Of course, one of the trickiest things is picking the right moment to have "the talk." This leaves us with the key question: How many dates before a relationship? 

There Is No Magic Number

If you were expecting me to give you a magic number, some universal answer that works every time, you can stop reading right now.

I can't give you a magic number because it doesn't exist.

The reason is simple, every person on the planet is different, and so is every couple. Two people can fall in love on the first date, or they can develop chemistry over time and decide they want to be a couple after 10 dates. There are no rules.

But, don't lose hope yet. We wouldn't be here if I didn't have some tips on how to calculate your own personal magic number to decide how many dates before a relationship.

Questions To Ask Yourself

Before you even consider anything else, you need to sit down and have a talk with yourself. There are three questions you need to answer. 

1. Are you ready for a relationship?

The first thing you need to figure out is whether or not you're ready for a relationship. Maybe you're still hurting from your previous relationship, or you're swamped with work at the moment and wouldn't have time to commit fully.

Ask yourself this question and follow your heart. There's nothing wrong with being single for a while if you come to the conclusion that you're still not ready. 

2. How well do you know him?

Don't rush into anything before you ask yourself how well you know this guy. Otherwise, you might idealize him, think you're falling in love and get serious with someone you don't even know.

Sooner or later you might realize he's not the person you imagined him to be and get disappointed.

3. Do you see a future?

The initial infatuation may blind you for a while. This guy is attractive, charismatic and fun and you love hanging out with him. And before you know it, you're in a relationship that's going nowhere.

Even though he may be fun, ask yourself if there's a future for you two.

How To Know If He's A Keeper

Once you've figured out what you want, you need to figure out what he wants. Is he ready to commit to you and start a relationship? Here are some signs you need to pay attention to. 

He's interested in your life.

When you get together, he takes an active interest in your life. He asks you about your day, listens when you talk and offers his honest opinion or advice if you're going through something tough.

And when something good happens in your life, he's happy for you and proud of your achievements. 

He stays in touch between dates

After a date, he doesn't wait a week to text or call you.

He doesn't just contact you when he wants to see you, but also checks in every few days to see what you're up to. 

He wants to go out on dates.

If he's only interested in sex, you'll quickly realize it. He will avoid going out in public with you and only want to hang out at his place or yours.

But if he wants a relationship, he will want to take you out on dates and never pressure you into having sex when you're not into it.

He introduces you to his friends.

If this guy wants you to meet his friends, it's almost a sure signal he wants a relationship with you.

Guys value their friends' opinions just like we do, so if he's trying to get you to hang out with his crew, he's serious about you. 

He asks about your opinion.

You can bet he really likes you when he's asking for your opinion.

Whether it's about buying a new pair of sneakers or making an important career decision, a guy who's ready to be your boyfriend always wants to hear what you think. 

He brings up relationship talk.

He brings up relationships first? You're in luck because this is a proven sign he wants to commit to you and he's testing the waters.

When he brings it up, make sure you give him the right feedback. If you want a relationship too, now is the time to say it. 

Observe And Be Patient 

There isn't a magic number that simply works for everybody. If you want to find out how many dates before a relationship, you'll need to be observant, follow your feelings and be patient.

But most importantly, be honest with yourself.

If you already know you want a relationship with this guy, don't be afraid to show it and even pull some tricks from up your sleeve to make him fall for you.

But if you realize there's no future, feel free to move on.

Relax and enjoy dating. Learn to read the signs and you'll be in a happy and fulfilling relationship with an awesome guy before you know it.

About the author

Amy Shaw
