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Showing posts from 2018
"First off," I say, "I don't remember you being British the last time we talked, bud." This dude - whoever he is - has just popped up all random-like in the middle of my house, and he wants me to do him a favor? He's got another thing coming.

"It's part of the agreement, innit?" he posits, his London dialect dripping with condescension. "Contract terms stated I'd hold on to your soul until I found a use for it. Well, I've found a use."

"Come on, man." I say. "Not fair. I'm right in the middle of something."

"The contract doesn't care if you're in the middle of something, Evan." The Devil leans against a wall, picking dirt from underneath his fingernails.

"You can't give me, like, a month or something to clear it up?"

"Unfortunately, no," he says. "Don't you want to know what the favour is?"

"Not particularly." I honestly don't care.…

The Dystopia We All Deserve

I remember a time when the gas masks weren't necessary. Back then, we could traverse the world without so much as a second thought for the air we were breathing, the fear of airborne toxins and thin atmosphere not even the tiniest of blips on our radar. It had all been so simple: wake up, go to school or work, go home, sleep. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Back when I was young, the overwhelming terror that held the world captive had been global warming: holes in the ozone layer caused by cans of hairspray and melting ice caps were going to kill us all. There had also been the looming possibility of nuclear war, but most of us preferred to shove that inevitability as far under the rug as we could.

Never once did any of us suspect what actually would transpire. Well, most of us didn't have a clue anyway.

The morning had started unremarkably. I was riding my bike to school when an entire fleet of chinooks flew overhead, their thunderous din boxing my ears with their proximity. I had ne…

The Door

"The door at the end of the hallway must never be opened," the old woman said, her milky white eyes nearly hidden by the sagging skin around her eyes. "The last time someone tried was back when I was a child."

Moving Forward



So that's where I am.


And that's ok.


Where were you?

9th grade. Study hall.
All of the TVs were on.
World forever changed.
#wherewereyou #neverforget
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I am the storm. #quotestoliveby
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Lorax Wisdom

Pondering this #wisdom today.
#lorax #drsuess #tuesday #tuesdaymotivation #tuesdaythoughts
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Being Fat on the Internet

*whispers* Hey there, you. Yes, you. I have a secret to tell you.

*leans in close, the fear practically leaping out of my eyes*
I'm fat.