Essay about A Child 's Ultimate Goal For A Son And Cry If A Daughter Is Born


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Kabul is a place where the majority of parents desperately hope for a son and cry if a daughter is born. Bacha posh are girls who disguise themselves as boys-- a temporary and practical solution in a society where women are seen as inferior. Although having a bacha posh in the family can have many upsides, often times there are struggles that come along with this hidden tradition. It is important to recognize the positives and negatives of those experience being a bacha posh for several reasons.

Afghan parents have various reasons as to why they decide to disguise their daughters as a son. Giving birth to a son is typically a mother 's ultimate goal in Kabul. There is a superstition of which if the family has a bacha posh, luck will be brought to them and the next born will be a son. The bacha posh is then returned to their role as a female once a son is born (Nordberg 72). Also, a strong reputation in society is highly dependant on the gender of the family 's children. Having a bacha posh and no sons is better than having all daughters-- even if others know the real truth. Some families make this decision in order to have more financial support which often times ties in with a better standing in society. Women in Afghanistan are not supposed to work outside of the house-- if they do they can receive death threats, especially if the woman is well-known (Nordberg 29). To temporarily fix this issue, families often force their child to become a bacha posh in order to bring income for the family (Nordberg 67). A more positive approach is that some parents, such as Azita and her husband, wanted to “show my youngest what life is like on the other side” (Nordberg 15). Although parents have different reasons for their daughter to be a ba...

... middle of paper ...” (Nordberg 300). For years they live their lives of having these opportunities of being heard in school and in their family, getting to go outside without the escort of another man, and being able to have the freedom to work (although in the lower-class this can often be seen as a downside of being a bacha posh). Once bacha posh hit puberty, they are pressured to resume their life as a woman. This transition can include forced marriages which often times involves marital rape or physical abuse (Nordberg 80, 158). They have to learn how to act like a women which can be very difficult since some bacha posh have lived their life as a boy for most of their life. Tasks that are considered natural for Afghan women such as cleaning, body language, tone of voice, socializing and abiding by her husband 's family rules are major struggles for bacha posh (Nordberg 76, 175).

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