Why does he think we are equal?

I have a 13yo SS. He is wonderful, but thinks that he is one of us. By that I mean, he doesn't have any problem interjecting his opinion into discussions when dad & I are discussing $ or whatever. He feels that it is unfair that his dad and I are making finacial plans to get smart phones. He doesn't think he should have to have a "crappy flip phone...I should get a smart phone too." He thinks it is ok to say all of the time, "that's not fair. You get to______!" so far, my response is that We pay the bills, we have jobs. You don't. Until you pay your own way, you get to live here and eat, with clothes on your back and a bed....I don't know where he got this sense of entitlement. OR for that mater, where he got the fact that he thinks we are his ='s. It is driving me crazy! IDK what to do.
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Mom Answers (3)
I agree with PP. It is hard to make an opinion without enough information. Sounds like a typical teenager. Just because he's offering his 5 cents on every parent decisions, doesn't mean he thinks he's equal. kids that age don't really understand the value of money until they learn to earn it themselves. If he wants to upgrade his phone then let him earn it. Either extra chores, delivering the paper, odd jobs for neighbors. I remember appreciating my things a lot more when I started making my own babysitting money. Good Luck
2 found this helpful
I can't really make an opinion without more information. In principle, yes, you are the adults, you make the money, you make the decisions. On the other hand, you sound a bit harsh. A 13 year old should be able to partake in at least some family discussions, it's an important part of growing up and learning to problem solve. You can continue making it clear that if he wants a better phone, he can make some extra money. I will point out, though, that in some jurisdictions a child is legally entitled to &quot;share the level of living of the parents&quot;, which would mean that it is not alright for a child to have clothes from a second hand store while Mommy keeps buying Chanel, so maybe that's something to consider to. All in all, unless he's right and you're neglecting him (which I don't think you are) and it's really only about the boy trying to have too much influence, just let him know that it's not going to be accepted in your household and he's not the boss of you.
Answered 7/15/12
1 found this helpful
I think your answer is spot on. Try giving him opportunity to make his way. If he wants something like a phone have him work for it. It will help build character, and an appreciation for hard work, and the value of a dollar. It goes back to chores and allowance.
Answered 7/15/12
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