Today I decided to finally add some of the pictures I had taken at local car shows.  There seems to be a show every night of the week, and the pictures are starting to pile up.  Most of them are from smaller shows in my area, but a few are from the massive Foxboro “Patriots Place” show that happens every other week.

I love going to the shows because I like to bring my Jaguar, which never seems to fit properly among the other cars.  I always am stuck amongst the muscle cars, looking rather silly.  It is rare to see a British car at any show, so people can never identify its make, even with the badging.  It is perceived as some renaissance fair throwback, or an alien spaceship.  Either way, the people never go near it.

Every show has Mustangs, and lots of them.  I know Ford sold a ton of them over the years, but it seems every single one has been “souped up” and put out for show.  In Foxboro, there were probably 200 of them, all the same decade, and all red, yellow or black.  I like Mustangs, but I don’t need to see them all at the same time.

The people are one reason why I go there.  Everyone says they go to car shows for the camaraderie, but they really go for the competition.  Even when there are no prizes, you can see people sizing up their neighbors.  Most people are pretty good to talk to, but sometimes you do get idiots.  I asked one guy about his Amphicar, and he acted like I asked for Whitey Bulger’s home address (Whitey is a big fugitive from MA).  I guess strange people are allowed to buy cars too.

Mustang groups are in love with their engines, and love to burn rubber.  When they aren’t racing their engines, they are usually racing their mouths.  They all dress like the band Korn, and generally hang around only with other Mustang people, which is fine by me.  Usually, I skip most of them, having seen it all before.  The import tuners are another group that sticks together.  They park their cars with every door open, flash some seizure inducing lights, and blast the 1000-watt stereo with the latest gay club tune.  I avoid them at all costs, for my own safety.

Muscle car guys are usually tattooed, middle class, and loud.  I risk drifting by the cars, but usually don’t stay for long.  Classic car guys bring the old stuff from the 1950’s and earlier.  They always seem to have a built in club at every event.  Some are older and bring the wives, who sit around in circles making snide comments about each other’s outfits.  Ask a classic car guy a question about his car, and you can plan on spending the night listening to them yap.  They know everything, and don’t mind telling you.

The group I like is the antique guys.  They are the ones that dragged out the Model T, cranked it up, and loaded the entire family into the back.  They love the cars, but wont bore you with the details on how they rebuilt the engine using metal they smelted themselves.  They are more fun, and much easier to walk away from.

Finally, we get to the custom rod guys, who bring us cars like the Ford T Bucket or the rat rod.  They know everything about the cars, and generally are the only ones to bring beer to the show.  The cars are cool, but if you even imply the wrong thing, then they break out the switchblades.  The bikers are another group that I avoid.  I have a bike of my own, but I can’t stand the loud pipes.  Some of these bikes could deafen a corpse, and they always look like they are dealing drugs.  I know this is a stereotype, and not all of them are drug dealers…but they do look like they have seen one too many episodes of “Sons of Anarchy.”  How is it that every biker in the world has the same jean vest, and I have never seen one on sale anywhere?

One thing you rarely see at a car show is an attractive girl.  The last show I went to had one woman who looked like she just brought her Olds Delta 88 directly from church, and another who looked like she just finished doing body shots at Sturgis.  There is never anything in between.  I think there should be a category for attractive girls and their cars.  It would certainly make things more interesting, though I doubt the freaks in the Mustangs could be trusted to behave appropriately.

I’ll post some more car show pictures soon.  Thanks for looking, and if you own a Mustang… I’m just kidding.

Article and photos courtesy of Chris Raymond