What if your parents don't want you Davening with a Minyan for whatever reason. Is it permissible to go Daven with the Minyan without their permission?

  • Why do you suspect Minyan be different from any other Mitzva? – Double AA Oct 27 '16 at 0:45
  • How old is the person in question? What is the alternative that the parents are suggesting - not davening, davening alone, something else? – WAF Oct 27 '16 at 1:48
  • Is it a matter of a school child and bedtime (with home work), or other matters. Is there a danger in going to the minyan too late at night? – sabbahillel Oct 27 '16 at 2:06
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    As implied by the other comments, the "whatever reason" makes all the difference. There is a huge difference between "because I don't want you to daven" and "because I've just injured myself and I need you to call an ambulance" (to use the two extremes). – Salmononius2 Oct 27 '16 at 15:04
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    @DoubleAA who said davening with a minyan is a mitzvah? – Yehoshua Feb 2 '17 at 16:11

ת"ר מנין שאם אמר לו אביו היטמא או שאמר לו אל תחזיר שלא ישמע לו שנאמר (ויקרא יט, ג) איש אמו ואביו תיראו ואת שבתותי תשמרו אני ה' כולכם חייבין בכבודי

The Rabbis taught: "From where do we know that if one's father said to him, 'Become tamei,' or he said to him, 'Do not return [the lost object],' that he may not listen to him? As it says (Vayikra 19:3), 'A man - his mother and his father shall they fear, but my Shabbasos shall they observe, I am HaShem.' [The juxtaposition of these phrases is as if to say,] 'You are all obligated in My honor'" (Bava Metzi'a 32a).

The Gemara clearly states that one may not listen to his parents if they tell him not to fulfill a mitzvah.1

Now, the passuk discusses Shabbos. The Gemara discusses a Kohen being impure (Vayikra 21:1) and returning a lost object (Shemos 23:4, Devarim 22:1-3). These are all Mitzvos d'Oraisa. How do I know that this should apply to Mitzvos d'Rabbanan as well, which would include out case of minyan2? Because the Torah commands us to listen to the Rabbis.3 If I don't go to minyan, I'm not listening to the Rabbis. If I don't listen to the Rabbis, I'm not listening to the Torah. If I do so because I'm listening to my parents, we're back to the discussion in the above Gemara.

1 It is obvious that if it's for your safety you should listen anyway, as in general one is not obligated to be put in a life-threatening situation, as per Vayikra 18:5. It is also obvious that we're discussing a case where the child is obligated in mitzvos, as otherwise he is not doing anything wrong if he refrains. (There may be an issue of the parent not training his/her child correctly.) The case discussed by the Gemara is where the parent simply doesn't want him fulfilling a mitzvah.

2 In regards to the general concept of davening, it is a debate between the Rambam and Ramban whether it is d'Oraisa or d'Rabbanan. Everyone agrees, however, that davening Shemoneh Esrei three times a day, and doing so with a minyan, is d'Rabbanan.

3 Related to this last point.


One is required to delay prayer (even if they will be late for Minyon), even if only to fulfill a request for tea from the market.

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    I think that you need to go into more detail and give sources. – sabbahillel Jan 2 '17 at 22:56
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    welcome to Mi Yodeya Ben! SabbaHillel is right that this answer would be improved with evidence and sources. Consider learning more about the site, from this short Beginners' Guide. – mevaqesh Jan 2 '17 at 23:07

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