Good Doctor Bad Doctor

Episode 32

Tina: 00:06 Hey everybody this is Tina again with Good Nurse Bad Nurse and this week I have a few announcements that I want to make, first of all I'd like to introduce a new member of Good Nurse Bad Nurse. Cynthia, say hello.

Cynthia: 00:21 Hi.

Tina: 00:22 So Cynthia is a fan of Good Nurse Bad Nurse and also she wants to come on and kind of help with co-hosting as well as with our social media accounts. So she's going to be our social media manager and help co-host some episodes and I'm really excited to have the help.

Cynthia: 00:39 I'm happy to be here. This is me fan-geeking.

Tina: 00:44 Awesome. Well it's just fun to have people to do this with. That's excited about it. We also introduced Christina a few weeks ago. Christina's going to co-host some episodes as well here and there and she's going to be doing some writing for our new website, which by the way is another announcement that I wanted to make. We have a new website and it's a, we've been able to secure the domain name, before we had goodnursebadnursepodcast(.com)...such a mouthful. We still have it but, and it works. But we really wanted good nurse, bad and we were able to get it. So I'm really happy about that. So if you go to the website, you're going to see a few things there. First of all, you can listen to any of the episodes on the website. If for some reason you're at your computer and you just want to listen from your computer, you can do that. Also we have merch so I'm really excited about that. We've got a few things on there and we'll be adding some more I think there's like a coffee Mug, a drawstring little tote bag that you know, the little backpack thing, I can't even remember. There's a few things like a tank top. It was tank top. Yup, that's right. Tank top. We are going to be adding a smart, I want to find a water bottle that um, haven't been able to find a water bottle because we all need stay hydrated, which is hard to do sometimes in those 12 hour shifts. And what I'd like to do is I'm going to get a few of those things and I've got them ordered but I don't have any yet, but I'd like to start doing some giveaways. So that's all coming down the pike. Also, something else that we're going to do, hosting the podcast, having the website, keeping the podcasts on d on Pod, bean marketing, all of that stuff is cost money and so we are going to offer a Patriot account on the website where if some, if you want to be a member you can have, we're going to have some like premium content that if you become a member for some very small amount then you can have access to some kind of bonus material. And I think we're going to do some videos and maybe, I don't know, just put who knows what and back there, but that's just to sort of help us like fund it. You know, obviously over the past year it's just been kind of me and my husband putting money into it and it's been my pet project and I would just kind of like to see it to pay for itself. Um, and that way I can continue to do it and it'll kind of, I kind of get my husband off my back about that it's getting a little expense and also the lesson or some incentive. Yeah. So I mean we do want to have some benefit to it. So we'll, we'll have some bonus content. We talked about putting like some unedited moments that we have plenty of moments where when we're recording we just kind of weird things happen. Sometimes they're funny and we're like, oh I can't put that in there cause we said something inappropriate. But anyway, also today I was having a conversation with Christina texting back and forth before we were, we were gonna try to record this morning and she and I were texting back and forth and after we finished I said this text messages is hilarious. This us back and forth. And I said, we should do screenshots of our pre, pre show conversations, appreciate texts. So because sometimes they get funny, you know, you're like stressing out over it and oh man, I can't find my microphone and all that stuff. It was kind of funny. So anyway, we're going to do all that and so be looking for that to come down the road. And for now we're going to go ahead and get started with the show. So we don't really have an in the news article to do this week. I kind of spent some time talking about, you know, introducing you and talking about the um, the website. So I guess we'll get right into the bad nurse story. Let's do it. Okay. So this story is a doozy as, as a lot of these are, it's a, it's a story about Michelle Hernden and she was a 24 year old fitness trainer and college students. She was, she went to college in Gainesville, Florida, Florida gators. And she was, according to everybody around her, everybody that knew her, she was very kind, very compassionate. She was planning to go join the Peace Corps when she graduated. So she, you can tell she was just a very giving person. But one day when she didn't show up for work or school, her fiance and her family, he got worried and they went to look for her and found her dead in her house. She was face down on her bed, fully clothed. And at first they really couldn't tell that there was anything wrong with her. Like there was no bruises, there was no wounds, no bleeding. There was like a half full bottle of beer laying beside her. But nothing that would indicate that she drank so much that she would have passed out or you know, the toxicology reports didn't show any drugs in her system. I mean they were just baffold.

Cynthia: 05:34 Well, just one thing I remember is that before they did the toxicology reports, so they didn't understand how a perfectly healthy 25 year old, 24 year old woman died with no sign of or outward sign up. Death is when they found, or the, the corner had found, the medical examiner, uh, when he was examining her body for the autopsy, did find that puncture wound and her outer arm. And then that's when they dug deeper and deeper toxicology report and did fine there. Provide the scene and the propofol and her system.

Tina: 06:15 That's right. Because the investigators at the house, when they, they just kept looking and kept looking and finally they kind of expanded their search to outside and they started looking in the, well, one of the investigators, he saw that there was a garbage can that was completely empty, didn't have a garbage bag in it. It was just an empty garbage Benny. He, he thought, hmm. Kind of had a hunch, went outside, looked in the garbage bins that were out at the curb, kind of like, you know, dumpster, I guess m right. Look through there. And they found a garbage bag tied up neatly. And inside that guard it's like a little small wastebasket. Yeah. Inside that garbage bag there was, there were vials of empty vials of propafol syringes, needles, a little butterfly kit to like ivy access. Yup. And they thought that was very interesting.

Cynthia: 07:11 Interesting is, is why would you leave it so close to it? You know, if he's, you know, he's guilty for this. Why would you leave all the evidence so close to the crime?

Tina: 07:25 Yeah. So propofol, just for those of you who don't know, propofol is used to sedate patients so that procedures can be performed or people can be intubated. It's a very powerful, it's very fast acting medication at wears off very quickly. So providers have to keep infusing the patient at a very slow rate to keep him sedated. It lowers blood pressure, it suppresses breathing. Patients have to be monitored constantly. While I'm propafol, they also tend to not remember anything after they wake up from being right, you know, from having it. Even if they, for some reason I've seen patients in the hospital on propofol, they're eyes are open and they're kind of like, I'm looking around and you think, wow, they're, they're awake, but they're really not. They don't have a clue what's going on and they don't remember anything when they wake up.

Cynthia: 08:10 No, not a thing. No. And and from what I remember, and I'm, and I'm not sure that it's actually an practice very commonly anymore, that the permit, those thing, propofol mixture is used as a Mike growing cocktail. However, but because of what you just described, the, you know what the propofol does to you, it's not something, it's on a treatment that's used in the home that you're hospitalized, you know, severe migraine and that is a treatment,

Tina: 08:44 right? Yep. That's true. So after they find these empty vials, they did have Michelle's blood tested specifically for propafol and that's not something that they would typically, they, it would never occur to them to test for propafol, but because they found those empty vials, they went, okay, let's go test specifically for that. And it did test positive of course. And so they suspected that whoever did this to her was definitely in the medical field because just the way it had been done and having the medical paraphernalia there, it was a very, like you said, very tiny injection site that they found smaller than a freckle. So it wasn't somebody who didn't know what they were doing there. It just sort of look like a medical professional hat of Mplus who would have access to propafol. That's something that typically is going to be either in an operating room and in a critical care unit, that sort of thing.

Tina: 09:39 Right. So some friends of Michelle told investigators that she had a friend who was a nurse at the hospital there at the University of Florida, known as Shan's Hospital. His name was Oliver O'quinn and he was a nurse in the surgical intensive care unit there. So was singly. Yeah, I believe he was actually a CR ne. Yeah, and that's interesting because I, I think I only saw one that I could find. I saw one, a mention of him being a, an, forget how it worded it. W it wasn't nurse anesthetist, but it was like a nurse, especially trained in anesthesia. So I thought was ECM see RNA. So I, I guess maybe he was, because it did say specialized and so he could have very well been a CRN. So one investigator thought about that needle cap. Okay. And how he had seen some medical staff using their teeth to upon a pole off that cap they've got, they've got the medicine drawn up in the syringe and then the cap there is on the needle and they take their teeth and pull out the cap and then and do whatever.

Tina: 10:47 I personally have never done that before, but he said that he said people do this. Well, it turns out he wanted to have that cap tested for DNA. So the detectives researched the viles of proof propofol that were found at the scene, trace them back to the distributor that had sent them to the hospital and they were able to trace those specific vials from the manufacturer to the hospital. And they were there. Those very vials were there at the hospital during the time that Oliver O'Quinn work there. And they also saw that he had removed two vials of propafol from the Pyxis just before the murder. So they could see that and all this. Yeah. Oh this is going on. Why he's run off to Dublin, Ireland, right? Yes. Yes. He, he, he got out of dodge after, after this happened. You Lt match. I know.

Tina: 11:40 So he, you know, it's interesting because you, you had mentioned to me like how did he take that out without anybody noticing? But I think sometimes in the intensive care units, they're nurses a little more leeway with some of these medications. And so I think they could tell he took them out, but maybe they aren't as strict maybe about wasting 'em he got 'em out for, maybe he pretended he was going to use them on a specific patient and he really didn't, which is kind of scary cause then what would that patient getting? Right. But whatever happened, he, it did trace back that he pulled two vials of propafol out of the Pyxis right before the murder. So they also noted that Oliver O'quinn had called Michelle every day for the nine days. That led up to her death, but he didn't call her at all immediately after her death.

Tina: 12:31 So even before anyone else knew or should have known that she was dead, all of a sudden the phone calls stop. Why would he all of a sudden stop calling her when no one else would have even they hadn't even found her yet. Her friend said it was obvious that he had a crush on her and detectives thought that the phone records from how many times he called her every day. It seemed like he was obsessed with her. So after her death, like you said, Oliver got on a plane, flew to Ireland where he actually applied for a nursing license in Ireland. So why would you immediately, your friend just died and you're going to jump on a plane and move to a completely different country and not only just go, you know, go to visit, but you're going to apply for a nursing license and just kind of put down some roots. It was just bizarre.

Cynthia: 13:21 Well, and you know, I, I always try to, you know, look at it from both sides. Did he really? Do this on purpose or was he honestly trying to help her and made a huge mistake and then panicked?

Tina: 13:37 Yeah, and that's, that does, I think it is important to consider, you know, both sides and think that it's obviously a possibility, you know, that something like that happen. So investigators, they begin the process of having him extradited back to the U S and detectives and formed the local newspapers over there where he, where he was and they ran articles that said nurse wanted for murder in the u s now living in Dublin. So that kind of ran him out of there. And he flew to Africa, to the country of Senegal where they immediately arrested him. As soon as he got there, it's sending back to the u s and they compared as DNA to that of the DNA found on the syringe cap. And guess what? It was a match. So Oliver, oh, Quinn was one of those nurses that use this tape to take the caps off the needles, which I've never done that before myself.

Cynthia: 14:29 Not while we're, we're all, we're trying not to because that's how you get stuck in the face with the needle.

Tina: 14:34 That's just crazy. I would, I wouldn't do it, but you know, no, he clearly did. So they were trying to figure out like a motive for why he would have killed her. He told a cellmate that he had, well, a cell mate claims that he told him that he had overheard her talking on the phone about him, says that she referred to him as an annoying little man. They think that that enraged him and he was just, you know, humiliated. And he knew after hearing that, that she wouldn't ever want to really be anything to him other than a friend. And he wanted clearly more than that. And so they, they think that was kind of, that's kind of their idea of what his motive was, I guess. So what did he say during the trial though? What was his explanation? Well, after being arrested, he did claim that he had injected the propafol to try to treat her migraines and that something went wrong and he accidentally killed her.

Tina: 15:28 And why did he run? Yeah, so he just was afraid. He was scared and he just got on a plane, went to Ireland to avoid any, just to try to get away, you know, not have to deal with it because he knew he had killed her and I guess he figured he was going to go to prison for that. And did he say anything about trying to offer any life supporting measures when he knew that the dose was too high or was that just it? He got scared and ran. He get, supposedly he got scared and ran into me if he really was injecting her with propafol, first of all, he gave her enough to kill her if he's a nurse anesthetist or, or even just a critical care nurse, I want to, it sounds like he probably was a nurse and as a CRN RNA, but like I said, I didn't see that specifically, but it's, I just have a hard time believing that he didn't know the amount of propofol that he was putting into her system.

Tina: 16:27 It does have a very short half life. It wears off very quickly. It seems like he must've put an awful lot into her system for her to, you know, be knocked out and stop breathing and then he, not only did he do that and then he does, like you said, he doesn't offer any lifesaving measures. So I mean he, he could have, he's medically trained. Yeah, that would be my, my first inkling. You know something to do it and you know as not, oh my gosh, I'm going to get in trouble viver for doing this. It's, oh my gosh, I've hurt my friend. Let me try to save her call nine one one start CPR. And that was never done. Right. It's, I, I guess I'm sort of with the investigators on this one that while it's very possible that he, it was all an accident and he really was trying to treat her migraines. It seems more to me like he used this as an opportunity to have access to her easily to her veins and, and then he took advantage of her trust and gave her too much and, and whether or not he was trying to kill her or he just wanted to knock her out so that he could, you know, be able to do whatever he wanted to and thinking he, she wouldn't remember it because it is propafol and he, he would, he would know that that side effect

Cynthia: 17:56 well and he would've had to give because like you said, at the half light, if fish so short, he would have had to give her a lot at once.

Tina: 18:05 Yeah. And both of those lines, it was two viles and both of them were empty.

Cynthia: 18:09 Are we talking about the big vials that we hang for? Like our ICU patients that are intubated?

Tina: 18:14 Sure. Like my goodness, I would hope not. I don't know for sure, but that's crazy. If it was those two huge bottles, well the jury didn't believe him and they convicted him of first degree murder. He was sentenced to life in prison without the possibility of parole. So they did not buy it for one second. So I don't know. I guess they looked at it like, I don't know, they just didn't believe him. And I guess I believe the jailhouse snitch. Who, who said that he told him, you know, that what she's, what he overheard her saying.

Cynthia: 18:45 Well, and, and one thing that, um, the judge was saying was that, um, he couldn't comprehend how anyone could understand why he would have done something like this and how he could have not have known what he was doing would have, you know, had the effects that it did.

Tina: 19:08 It's not like he, he was not trained in using that very specifically, that very medication. He knew all about that medicine. He knew exactly what it did. He knew he knew exactly how much to administer. He knows how much he gives patients in the hospital. So I just, I just have a hard time believing he didn't know. He certainly knew the risk. There's no doubt about it.

Cynthia: 19:30 Yeah. And, and it's sad because she also had aspirations of not only, like you said, joining the Peace Corp what I'm adopting children out of these countries and giving them a good life. And the mother was quoted saying that she grieves for all the children that will never know. Um, Michelle as a mother.

Tina: 19:59 I know. I read that too. It's, that was sad. It's so sad. Did you, I found this one story where it says, um, her parents were cleaning out her apartment and a homeless man came up to them and asked if Michelle was moving. Yeah. Her father told him no, she died. And he told her father that Michelle used to save cans for him. So he started crying when it finally sunk in that she was dead and not coming back. And her father tried to give him $20, but he went and take it and he told her father that she talked to him like he was somebody.

Cynthia: 20:31 Yup. If that's any indication of the type of person that she was, I don't know what is. Yeah.

Tina: 20:37 Yeah. Michelle's mother said I was in awe of my child. Michelle was everything I want to be. She stood up for what she believed in. She said what was on her mind

Cynthia: 20:48 and where I've seen injustice, I'd say, isn't that terrible? Michelle would do something about it. So she sounds like a, like she was just a wonderful person and it's just extremely tragic that this guy did this to her. Yeah. But I'm glad they got the evidence. They caught him and he's serving his time and it, in my opinion, it's not punishment enough. And or what mother, would it ever be punishment enough losing a child to a murder, I got to say. Yeah, I totally agree. Well that's the bad nurse story for this week and this is the awkward transition time as I call it because it's always kind of awkward to go from one story to the next. So I just kinda like go, okay. Awkward Transition Time. Yeah. Get, get you real down and then, you know, pick back up an emotional rollercoaster. Yeah. So we don't have to go leave on that that bad.

Cynthia: 21:47 Exactly. And I, and I, the good nurse toys are obviously always my favorite. And this story is about a Nicole Cron who's a, and a retired nurse, Len Bahr toasts and Lynn, she's a act, she's a retired nurse and she goes to a treatment center, looks like was it every week, um, for rheumatoid arthritis treatments. And she's got the same nurse every time she goes. And each of them thought that they recognize, yeah, there, there was something familiar. They had some sort of odd connection. You ever meet somebody and then your, your spirits are just kinda like, maybe I know you from another life or you just, you click right. So as they got into talking nurse crime, the younger nurse, Nicole, when she was a child, two year old, two years old, she was going to the children's hospital to have a, what was it? She had some sort of condition that caused her intestines to become twisted.

Cynthia: 22:58 She was born and I had to go to the GI clinic on a regular basis to have feedings intravenously. That's what it was. Okay. Yeah. And so the nurse that took care of Nicole, who affectionately called the Cole Nini was actually Lynn. And now Nicole will be in 30 years old was talking to Lynn and Lynn had, you know, the, the getting to know each other and uh, you know, Nicole was telling her about how she had to, you know, want it to always be a nurse because of, uh, the first several years of her life were, you know, spent in and out of the hospital because of this disease where her or this issue where her I'm testing had been twisted and had to be removed. Well, and Lynn said, well, I was a nurse there for many, many years and then they both, there's a story I read.

Cynthia: 23:49 They looked at each other and it clicked and Lynn asked her Nini and she is, she jumped up, she was excited. She says yes, yes. And so, you know, 30 years the good comes around and Lynn and an interview, she had wandered through all her or her years as being a nurse. How's she helped somebody? Had she done good for somebody? Did she make a difference and meeting Lynn or Nicole, she had learned that, yeah, she did make a difference. Nicole said she know that she, she knew that she always wanted to be a nurse and it was because of Lynn. Yeah,

Tina: 24:32 yeah. She said watching her and how, how sweet and how nice. She used to call her sweet Lenny Lenny that the hospital actually did a feature on that little, a little couple, you know, the uh, sweet Linney and Nini, uh, together in a magazine for the hospital of like a nursing magazine back in 1988. There's actually up a little article that they did on them because you know, are little friendship. So I thought that was kind of cool.

Cynthia: 24:58 It is. Yeah. Then the art, the magazine was called children's nurse and on the covers featured a land Bartos with little two year old at the time, two year old patient Nicole, uh, nanny fry right there on the cover. And so with these, the new articles that have come out to show the change in 30 years, and now it's Nicole Holding Lynn and taking care of one, I think that's just good Karma come around. Yeah,

Tina: 25:28 it isn't. It's amazing that it was just completely a fluke that had happened just to, for them to be brought together that way. It's not like she saw, they saw each other out. I for all these years, she's just, she's literally taking care of the woman who took care of her in a very similar way. You know, she was going, the, the little girl was having to go to an outpatient Gi clinic and get treatments. And now here she is coming to this outpatient infusion center and getting treatments. It's just, it gives me chills when I think about it. It's just crazy.

Cynthia: 26:05 It does. Because what, what are the odds of that? But, and I just loved that Lens. Got Her, her, you know, she's an older woman now. She's, she's got her question saying, so she, you know, she made the difference in one person's life, a child's life. And not that that child is now a nurse and making a difference for people every day. And I love that. And, and you know, you can say, well, maybe that's kind of Corny to say that, but, but, but it's true. It's true. It's a good feeling to know that you've made that kind of impact on somebody's nursing is a thankless job. And to have something like this happened to know to have your feelings validated. That's a beautiful thing.

Tina: 26:53 It really is. There are, there definitely is a shortage of nurses. Uh, we've talked before here on good nurse, bad nurse about the fact that there's really not a shortage of nurses per se. There's ton, there are tons and tons of our ends out there. The problem is that there's a shortage of nurses who want to work as a nurse because it's such a difficult job. It doesn't pay very well. So, uh, we need nurses. We need nurses who want to work at the bedside and take care of people.

Cynthia: 27:26 Right. And I think the, what makes it worth it is knowing that you've helped somebody, you've gotta love helping people and love people. The end, I'll bet everybody's going to say thank you when it's time for them to go home. And it's not because they made to be ugly. It's just, you know, they're in a vulnerable, vulnerable moment of their own. They're thinking of themselves there, they in which they should be there. They're hurt or sick and and whatever that situation might be. But you just got to know in the back of your head that when they get better, they will think about you then made it. Not everybody may not always reach out to you and say thank you, which I know that does happen, but they think about you.

Tina: 28:11 Yes, they do. And we, we get cards sometimes where I work, we'll get cards from people, they'll send us things, especially around the holidays. We get things from, from patients and family members and it's always so nice just to know that they're thinking about us and that they appreciate the care that they're, that they were given or that their loved one was given. We have gone to several of the nurses that I work with have gone to funerals for patients that we cared for over a long period of time. So it's, it's a special profession for sure. It's, it's not for the faint of heart. No, but, but it's one that I enjoy. I love it. I love taking care of people. And I love and I love working with other nurses. Nurses are amazing people. They're wonderful people to work with. For the most part.

Cynthia: 29:00 When I started working in the hospital a few years ago, I had never worked with medical people. Of course, I mean medical people on my family, but I've never worked in the hospital and got that experience and within a week I knew this is what I wanted to do. And I also knew that nurses, male, female, all right, totally different breed of individual. There's just something special about people that put on their uniform scrubs every day, morning and night and go on there and self love selflessly, take care of these other human beings who need us so much. And I just, I

Tina: 29:42 was in all of the type of people that I got to work with every day. I am too. I am all, I mean all every day I, I've worked with some of the best nurses in the area that I live in and the the best to me, the best hospital in this whole area. And I, I'm in all of the time when I see the compassion that people have, the empathy that they have, the, the intelligence and the quick responses. I'm just amazed and so impressed. Absolutely. So we love you guys. Just know that. Yes we do and I love the new, you know, new grads are the best and they you're gonna find out real fast Cynthia that and you're one of them. Um, but they will, they email they, well they mostly are methyl message on, on social media. They will send messages and there's so amazing.

Tina: 30:33 I love to hear from them and they're like, oh, I listened to your podcast on the way to work or I put this in your podcast. I'm here or there, I have a long commute or whatever. And they are so encouraging. I just love your podcast and I love their enthusiasm for nursing and I want to continue this podcast because I want to continue to encourage them. I want new grads, new nurses to continue to be excited about their profession because there, there is going to come a time, new grads, when we've talked about this before, about six months off orientation, you're going to be questioning your life twice. It happens to everybody. I see it all the time. I'm a team leader where I work and I see it all the time and you start seeing stress and negativity and just kind of like, it's just sort of, you can see it.

Tina: 31:27 You can see it in their eyes when they, when they're leaving their cry easily. I remember doing it, I remember going through it. So I want everyone to know that you are going to get through that time and when you come out on the other side, you're going to love what you do and you're going to be so happy that you made the choice. So whenever you, if you start feeling that way like, oh, why did I do this? This is terrible. I hate this. Just know you're going through the fire you're going to get when you come out on the other side, you're going to be a beautiful diamond and you're going to take care of your patients and you're gonna be so smart. You're going to know so much, and you're just gonna get better and better. My thought to that is, of course I haven't.

Tina: 32:04 I mean, I'm a new Grad, so I haven't been a nurse long enough to be on the other side yet, but I, but I sit here and think, what could possibly be worse than those years of nursing school I just went through and all the crying and frustration. Certainly there's nothing worse than that. They're there. I will say that there, Cam, I hate to say this because I know it's going to be kind of discouraging, but what the reason I'm saying this is that I want you to know that it's common. Everybody goes through it because what happens is you know what all you went through a nursing school, so when you all of a sudden hit a point that you're aren't enjoying what you do, it's, it's horrifying. You're just, you're kind of like, why did I go through all of that? It was so hard, and now I'm not even enjoying my life.

Tina: 32:56 A miserable, and you get miserable because in the best nurses go through this, I'll tell you that right now. You know why? Because they have so much compassion and they care so much about their job that they want to do it perfectly and you're not perfect. You're a human being. You're brand new and you don't know everything. You can't possibly, nobody knows everything. But when you're brand new, you, you're still learning. Even if even if you're off orientation, you're still learning and you're going to make mistakes. When you do that, you're going to beat yourself up. You're going to sit in the car and cry. You're going to come home and cry. You're going to wake up at three o'clock in the morning and remember something you didn't do. You're going to go through all these things. I'm telling you because everybody does it. And when you do that, you're thinking about those, you know, three, four years that you spent in nursing school or you know, the years leading up to it and then here years a nursing school and you're just going, why did I, what did I do that was so hard? Now here I am just pro. I promise you stick it out. You're going through the fire. When you come out on the other side, you're going to be a wonderful nurse. You're going to be the best nurse. You're going to make mistakes. I'm sorry, but you are, everybody does.

Tina: 34:13 So Cynthia sitting there going, oh, I don't know about because she's, I don't know about Cindy has got, I don't know if I wanted to know all of that. Well I, I, I'm just telling you that you're going to be a good nurse and you're going to enjoy it and sometimes it's all about who you work with too. I do have some, some good nurses that I work with, new Grad nurses who I feel like are having a pretty good experience because they have good coworkers. They have people working around them that are supportive, that are like, Hey, I feel like you're struggling. What can I do? What can I do? Or if they make a mistake and they pull you into the storage room ago, I did, you know, whatever, you know, and they'd tell you something that they did and you're just like, it's fine.

Tina: 34:59 Don't worry about it. It's okay. Move on. It's good. You're good. I'll tell you, I'm going to tell you a story. That tiny stores. So nurse pulled me into the store room just like that storage room or, um, one of the supply closets. And she was like, oh my goodness, I can't believe what I just did. And I'm like, what? What did you do? It's not that bad. She was crying so hard that she couldn't tell me, I'm terrible. I'm a terrible nurse. You're not a terrible nurse. What did you do? Whatever it is, you're a wonderful nurse and it doesn't matter. Well, she, she had the cylinder and like 60 cc syringe that you use to give meds into a peg tube. I don't know if you're familiar with that yet, but, so patients that have peg tubes and you know you have a little cell, like a plastic cylinder, graduated cylinder, and then you have 60 cc syringes.

Tina: 35:47 It kind of goes inside of that and you kind of keep that at the bedside throughout the day. We change it out once a shift, we throw it away at the end of the shift to get a new one. Well she threw it away on the top. The garbage bag was brand new and she threw it in there before she had gone to get a new one. And so then she remembered she had a med she needed to give. So she reached in and pulled the Syringe, the syringe out of the garbage can right off the top. It wasn't touching anything and she was about to use it and the patient's family members or do that and said, I didn't you just pull that out of the garbage? And she said, she said yes, I did. And she said, I really don't know what I was thinking.

Tina: 36:30 I mean, she was like, she can't even explain it. She's like, she was just in a hurry. It's the end of the shift. She's wanting to get everything done. And she was like, I wouldn't do that in a million years if I was just thinking, you know, for one second, I don't know, made me do that. So she said, I'll never forget. She could never, she just couldn't even get past it. She, she's just like that everything that I had done for that patient all day, all the things that I did for him, all the things that has family members saw me do, the wonderful nursing that I did for him went out the window with that one moment and that one mistake or thing, I know it's rough, it's rough. You're going to do dumb things like that. And then she knows it was, you know, it was just a moment. And it's like she's in her mind, she's thinking it was down in the cylinder. It wasn't touching anything. It was a brand new garbage bag. Like she just did it thinking it was harmless. Sure. Banner sourceful yeah.

Tina: 37:34 So anyway, you learn from your mistakes and you move on. So, and I've got plenty of those too, so I got plenty of stories. I can't think of one right now, but trust me, I did some dumb stuff. Hopefully I, hopefully they get less and less as time goes on. You know, as time goes on, you get better and you learn from your mistakes. What the mistake I seem to mate, well, I, and I let him pretty good at it now, but at first, my first couple of weeks, I seem to always inject too much air into the bottle when I'm withdrawing and medication. So when I pull the needle out, I get, you know, a bath, whatever the medication was and it makes me feel so stupid. And, but yeah, and I, and I'm already laughing at it now, but I felt so stupid and I'm like, I thought, oh my gosh, I can't even pull medication out of a bottle. What, what good am I? I'm a horrible nurse. I can't even know. You know what's funny is I thought you were going to say, I find myself injecting too much air into the patient's line. I was like, no,

Cynthia: 38:37 no, no, no, no. That is my biggest fear. I've watched way too many movies of the air, air in the line. So, uh, no,

Tina: 38:46 no bubbles, no air bubbles. I won't eat the flushes every single time, you know, to have it. Just get all the extra céline out. Nowhere whatsoever. No bubbles.

Cynthia: 38:57 Right? Yeah. My preceptor's like you're wasting the medication. The lines primed. I'm like, nope. There's one more bubble right there. Yeah.

Tina: 39:06 Nope. It can't have a bubble going in. Nope, not on my watch. Well, I guess that ends our show and it's Cynthia, this was our first episode. You did a great job. I'm so proud of you. Thank you. This is going to be such a good partnership. I'm so excited and I want everybody to go on any of our social media sites, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter. I tend to like Instagram myself. I like Facebook. Okay. But Instagram is probably my favorite is all about the images are little videos and it just seems more uplifting and positive to me. I don't know. So you're going to help balance us out and keep us, keep us up to date. So everybody go on there, be sure and make comments since Cynthia some messages and go to our website, take check it out and just see the changes that are coming. We'll have more going on there. We don't have the, all the stuff that I talked about at the beginning is not on there yet, but the merchandise is definitely on there and you can kind of just see what's going on with, there's more things to come. We talking about that. Um, in the future, in future episodes

Cynthia: 40:11 and come on our Facebook page. Let's start a conversation. Let, let's talk about something. What's going on and, and you're nursing world new grads. I'm sure we had a lot to, we can bounce off of each other to help make our days or nights a little easier.

Tina: 40:26 Yes, we have a closed group, a good nurse, bad nurse group. It's a closed group. I started it and a few people have joined it. Um, but there isn't a whole lot of activity on it yet. So I've been a part of some Facebook groups before and they can get to be really fun because you, everybody's posting things and you can comment and have really good conversations. So I'd like to see that happen. It's, it's like, uh, like I said, I do work full time and then with recording the podcast, editing the podcast, um, all this stuff, it's a lot for me so I don't have a whole lot of time to go on. They're creating a lot of content, but hopefully Cynthia will get some of that going on the, on the closed on the group so you can kind of chat. And the Nice thing about a closed group on Facebook is that you can say things and everybody under the sun, in your face book, um, all your Facebook friends won't see it. Only the people in the group can see what you're saying. So that's Kinda Nice. Like if you want to talk about work or something, your friend, you know, your coworkers aren't, aren't going to see what you're saying. And you can like vent. Like, oh my gosh, this one nurse was so mean to me. Or whatever, you know.

Tina: 41:37 Anyway, we'll see what happens. You guys have a good week and remember, even if you're a bad girl or a bad boy, be a good nurse.