Opinions are like butts…

Everyone has one and they all stink

The picture is of Darcy choosing her potty she has yet to use 🙄. Whatever. Anyway, this is a different kind of blog post for me, but lately I have realized that I really just don’t agree with a lot of things, and I decided to have an unpopular opinion post! Maybe it’s that I’m getting closer to being a real adult (i.e. almost thirty) and really knowing what I do and don’t believe in, enjoy, or even condone. Or maybe it’s just that most people are stupid and have stupid opinions. Me, obviously excluded. Hey, what’s the point of having your own blog if you aren’t the queen of it? Be gone, naysayers!

Unpopular opinions that I, Rebekah Rayner, have and hold dear to my heart.

1. Chipotle is not great. Yep. I know, as a millenial I’m supposed to be all, “OMG! Chipotle, let’s get extra guac!” But, I just don’t get the fascination. Their meat is kinda gross, and overall I think it’s overpriced and under-flavored.

2. I hate the over usage of ALL CAPS when promoting your AWESOME multi-level marketing product. While I realize it may be an AMAZING OPPORTUNITY, I just think the caps and multiple emojis look stupid. Stop it.

3. This here is a biggie and I am sure people will hate me forever–I don’t like publicized adoption fundraisers. There. I said it. Maybe it’s because I feel like there are go-fund-me pages for everything today. Maybe I’m bitter because I’ve paid for both of my children to have neurosurgery, multiple scans, and therapy without asking for other people to pay my bills. Maybe it’s because I am a self-professed cynic and question people’s motives. Probably a combination of all of that and other specific reasons I won’t go into right this moment. Anyway, a lot of things about it just turns me off.

*Edited to add that I LOVE adoption itself. Seriously I do. Just not fundraisers❤️❤️

4. Putting any sauce other than Polynesian or Chik-fil-a sauce on your Chik-fil-a nuggets is a straight-up abomination. You know who you are, and you are wrong, and you are ruining the Lord’s chicken.

5. While I enjoy my friends who are mamas, I’m not into mama groups. They tend to freak out over Every. Little. Thing. Oh mylanta. Your baby has a runny nose? It’s fine. Wipe it off occasionally. Your baby is only saying 6 words and they should be saying 8?! He fell down and cried?! Agh. If you are a laid back mom, we can probably be friends. If you run to the doctor’s office every time your kid sneezes or has a fever, we will never be friends. Most of this comes from being a nurse, but also I have worked with kids who are dying of cancer. Get your perspective straight, mama. He has a cold. He’s gonna get approximately 25641321568 more in his lifetime. It’s small stuff.

6. People who constantly talk about their special diets suck. I mean I would have never guessed you ate “clean” foods when every post has #cleaneating #wholefoods #healthy. Hashtag: Get over yourself. No one cares. That’s right, no one. They really don’t. They also don’t want to see your food pictures #chefstatus. Look, I’m a nurse. I totally get healthy living. Just try not to make it your God because while eating well can and will totally improve your overall health, it will not eliminate your chance of death. You will still die. So quit trying to say your kale brownies are just as good as my butter filled ones are. You’re lying to yourself.

7. I have not cried once watching “This is Us.” It’s a really great show, but I don’t understand everyone’s constant tear-filled status updates about it. I came closer to crying watching Glenn’s garbage can scene in Walking Dead. Also Kate is really mean to her mom, and it gets annoying. Be nice, girl.

8. I don’t agree with the whole “Mama needs wine” thing. If you’ve been living under a rock, it’s really this whole social movement now, filled with memes, t-shirts, and yes, even wine glasses touting the misery of motherhood and the MUST have daily “wine to put up with your kids’ whine.” Maybe I’m just more sensitive to those who may struggle with drinking, but I find the constant promotion of needing “mommy’s juice” distasteful.

*Sidenote–I am not against drinking. I really enjoy an occasional cocktail, mug of beer, or glass of wine. Nothing wrong with that. What I’m talking about is the greater culture’s attitude associated with motherhood and needing alcohol. It’s offensive.*

10. I don’t care that McDreamy died. I’ll explain. In the beginning, he had a wife and never told Meredith until said wife showed up looking like Cruella. Then he chooses wife over Meredith. They work that mess out, but he was a total jerk his last 2 seasons of Greys. He was hateful and unforgiving and punished Meredith forever for the clinical trial/chief webber’s wife thing. He was a total jerk when he was chief. Finally, he totally strayed even if he didn’t actually sleep with that lab assistant. Suddenly he has this “I actually love Meredith” revelation, they’re happy for one episode and he dies. Big. Deal. He was a tool, good riddance.

So, there. Now you can say what a negative person I am. But in the spirit of comradeship, I will give you some examples to show that I probably love or do several things that you kind of hate. Unpopular opinions, UNITE!

1. Starbucks. I’m probably supposed to hate the overpriced drinks and stupid naming of their sizes, but I feel sassy when I get a drink there. I also love lattes, and you will not take that away from me no matter what evil Starbucks perpetuates in our world.

2. I am very ambitious. See, I totally want to be the mom in the SUV who wears yoga pants, drinks her latte, drops her kids off at daycare, and then goes to the gym before meeting her friends for lunch. I would love to be *that* mom because *that* mom has it going on and is living life right. #lifegoals #divaaspirations

3. I love “Walking Dead.” Just like the rest of the world, but maybe you don’t.

4. I think politics is the worst part of our world. I also don’t feel the need to be involved. And yes, I’m aware that people will say that is my “privilege talking,” but I don’t really care. I hate discussing politics, and if you continually espouse your hard-right or hard-left leanings, I have probably already blocked you on social media. Not sorry.

5 I’m a touchy-feely person. I tell people how I feel, and I hug ‘em hard. Some people absolutely hate affection. I’m not one of those, and if you’re my friend, I’ll tell you I love you everytime we talk. I’ll mean it, too.

6. I double dip my chips. I’m courteous enough to get my own bowl of dip, but I’m a double-dipper because the dip is the best part. By dip, I mean salsa. Obviously.

7. I zone out on social media or playing on my phone all the time, just like baby-boomers accuse the evil millenials of doing. I’ve ignored my husband talking to me and allowed Darcy to clobber Clark while doing this. I’m working on it, but yep. I’m a distracted millennial.

8. I’m not into the hella long beard thing. A little scruff is okay, but the super long beards are gross. Like don’t come near me with that. Something living might fall out of it. Just ew. Also manbuns=🤢

9. I’m not wild about avocados. I mean they’re fine on or in stuff, but I’m not trying to make an entire dish featuring avocados. I get that they are a *hot* food, but I’d rather not have avocado deviled eggs or avocado toast. Ain’t my thang, y’all.

10. I totally overshare on my blog. Not much is off limits to me, so I have a hard time understanding super mysterious people. Like what’s your deal? Why are you standoffish. Are you hiding something? Why won’t you tell me things? Why don’t you love me?! See # 5.

11. I’m a Rodan & Fields convert. Can’t argue with results, y’all.

So there you have it! What unpopular opinions do you have??

2 thoughts on “Opinions are like butts…”

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