Friday, December 04, 2009

Illuminutty: the secret brotherhood of the chronically gullible

"I have free rein. I can sell whatever I want because I'm protected by the First Amendment. I can sell a book that says the moon is made of cheese, and it should be protected by the First Amendment."
~Kevin Trudeau,
quoted on Mitch Lipka's WalletPop blog

Note: I have modified part of this post slightly since I first published it on December 4. In this piece I quote from the sales pages for Kevin Trudeau's "Your Wish Is Your Command" CD set, but some of the copy on the pages has changed in the two weeks since I first wrote the piece. Some of the items I quoted are no longer on the pages. But trust me, I didn't make them up. Just to make things easier, I'll write my annotations about the changing ad copy in this pretty color. And I might as well add this little disclaimer now: All of the sales copy I quote in this piece is subject to change, as is everything on the Interwebs. I cannot guarantee that it will still be there as I quoted it by the time you follow the links, should you choose to do so.
~CC, 18 December 2009

Kevin Trudeau's stories just keep getting better and better. So you thought that Joe "Mr. Fire" Vitale's various versions of his success story were entertaining? Well, Joe has nothing on True-dough, who recently revealed to Mr. Fire and friends at a private dinner in Wimberley, Texas, that the real secret to True-dough's success is his membership in... are you ready for this?....a secret society called The Brotherhood. (This may or may not be The Brotherhood Kevin is talking about. I'm too lazy to really research it. But that's not the main point of this piece anyway.)

I have to wonder what True-dough will come up with next: perhaps the revelation that he has been receiving coded messages from the Pleiades since he was a child? Or that he discovered a lost tribe of sparkly blue people during his world travels, and they are the ones who truly possess the wisdom of the ages, which they taught to him and him alone? (He can always accuse James Cameron of stealing his idea.) Or maybe the startling confession that when he was in prison in the 1990s, someone slipped him some ancient secret scrolls from the Lemurians who dwell beneath Mount Shasta? (Actually, when he was in prison he did meet a guy, a former cocaine dealer named Jules Lieb, who became a joint-venture partner with him after the two men got out of da joint. Said JV was a company called Nutrition for Life, for which he and Jules were later sued by the State of Illinois for operating an illegal pyramid scheme.)

Actually, True-dough has been telling some form of the "secret society" tale for a few years now, at least since 2006 if not before, as evidenced on this piece on Dr. Stephen Barrett's Quackwatch site. But it was only recently that True-dough revealed his secret society connections to Mr. Fire, who then eagerly shared it with his mailing list.

Anyway, I digress. The story True-dough tells really doesn't matter any more. He clearly believes that from a First-Amendment standpoint it doesn't matter if he tells the truth or not, and from a marketing standpoint "truth" is apparently even less important. It appears that no matter how outrageous his tales become, people will still line up to give him their money. And he knows it.

Increasingly, lesser but endlessly ambitious hustledorks are grabbing on to his coattails as well, hoping to get a huge piece of a half-baked but nevertheless heartily substantial pie. Regarding True-dough's present big scheme, well, don't say you didn't see this one coming. I know I did, as far back as January of this year, and then again in July. And by late November, the signs were unmistakable (okay, on those last two links you'll have to scroll down a little to get to the truly relevant part). Then just yesterday, the aforementioned Joe Vitale sent a breathlessly excited message to his email list.*
From: Joe Vitale
Date: Thu, Dec 3, 2009
Subject: Learn the Law of Attraction secrets "they" don't want you to know

Over the past few months, I've been getting to know bestselling author and marketing legend Kevin Trudeau.
You've probably seen his famous infomercials for his books, including Natural Cures "They" Don't Want You To Know About, More Natural Cures Revealed, Debt Cures, and The Weight Loss Cure. He is also a multimillionaire who started from scratch.
Recently we got together for dinner here in Wimberley, TX at my private club, and I asked him how he became so wealthy and successful at such a young age - in such a short amount of time. (I was not going to let this opportunity pass me by without draining him of every bit of knowledge I could get out of him.)
What he said next almost floored me. He said, and I quote, "I follow a set of success secrets I learned at a young age while I was in a secret society called 'The Brotherhood.' Once I learned these success secrets, the law of attraction started working for me. These are secrets that are not available to the general public."
I was wide-eyed at hearing this.
Now, if you've been reading Joe's stuff for any length of time, you know that he's quite often wide-eyed, astonished, riveted, hypnotized, floored, or similarly overwrought, and on more than one occasion has gotten so excited over a product or a person that his hands shake. He's a pretty excitable guy overall, almost pathologically so, and his livelihood depends upon his infecting his followers with that pathology as well.

But this This. Is. Beyond. Exciting.

What is truly exciting about it from Joe's perspective (and interesting from my own perspective) is that it represents a further fusion of the New-Wage/McSpirituality bidness and traditional hucksterism. True-dough really seems to be attempting to bring Joe into his schemes, and Joe is only too glad to be a part of it all. Using one of his favorite copywriting tools, the bulleted list, he explains the allure of Kevin's secrets.
Kevin said these secrets are so powerful, that he used them to attract:
And much more!
Well, I can create bulleted lists too, and here are some items Joe forgot to add to the list of things Kevin has attracted:
But never mind all that. I'm sure Kevin himself would say that it's all good for business, especially that last item. And indeed, he has long used his battles with the government as a marketing tool, as I've noted here before.
Excitedly, Joe continues in his email message:
[Kevin] then told me that he recently started doing something he's never done before ---- teaching a select few people the money attracting and success secrets he learned from "The Brotherhood" and other secret societies.
These are the exact same secrets only known by world leaders, celebrities, business leaders, royal families and other secret society members.
These are money attracting secrets that have never been told before - until now.
Next he reached into his briefcase and gave me a gift - a bottle of reusable laxative pills.
Ha, ha, just kidding about those reusable laxative pills. That's another story. What True-dough really gave Mr. Fire was...
...a set of his 14-CD program new called -"Your Wish Is Your Command". [link provided]
The program comes in two parts.
1. Your Wish Is Your Command/How To Manifest Your Desires
2. How Anyone Can Make Millions/The Money Making Secrets "They" Don't Want You To Know About
Kevin told me that "Your Wish Is Your Command" contains a 2-day weekend lecture he gave a few months ago to an invitation-only audience. Each attendee paid over $11,000 to attend and hear these secrets. (!)
I took the program home and listened to all 14 CDs over the next few days. I took pages and pages of notes and learned money making technique after money making technique. Techniques I never heard before or even knew existed. And the beauty is that not only do you learn the secrets - you will also hear Kevin's amazing rags to riches story - AND you will learn ALL of his money attracting secrets (which he will walk you through step-by-step). Secrets never released before to the general public.
Once you know these closely guarded secrets, you too can learn to become a millionaire, improve your health, experience quality business & personal relationships, influence others, and live the life you've only dreamed of.
I don't want to give away too much here as it is better that you hear all about "Your Wish Is Your Command" directly from Kevin.
To learn more about "Your Wish Is Your Command" and get it for a ridiculously low price, go here -- [link provided again]

Oh, my, yes, you can just feel the love from Joe. But Kevin is full of love too, and in case you have any doubt whatsoever about his altruistic motives, here's Joe again:
PS - Kevin is making these money attracting secrets available to you for next to nothing compared to what they're worth. I mean seriously next to nothing! He's also only releasing a limited amount of Your Wish Is Your Command programs. So see below to learn more -- [link provided yet again]
PPS - Kevin will also give you a personal invitation to join him in a "member only" wealth club that could allow you to personally meet and be mentored by some of the most successful people in the world. Don't miss this once in a lifetime oppourtunity [sic].[link provided once again (in keeping with Mr. Fire's hypnotic formula of repeating a link several times within a message)]
So what's in it for Joe? Rest assured that he has no interest in the scheme whatsoever.
Note: I'm not in business with Kevin and I'm not an affiliate for his program, but I *do* personally endorse his audio cds. Get them.
Not in business with True-dough? Uh-huh.

I don't know much about Internet affiliate schemes, but each of those links Joe provided in his email contain an extension that I'm guessing is an identifier telling Kevin that the person was referred by Joe. If you leave off the extension entirely, you'll get to a similar but not identical page [I previously wrote that you will get to the same page, but that was incorrect.] So it's not beyond the realm of possibility that Joe is getting some sort of consideration for driving traffic to Kevin's site. Moreover, if I know anything about Joe's M.O., he doesn't do a mass mailing unless there is something in it for him. Maybe his working relationship with Kevin is structured in such a way that Joe can truthfully say that he's not technically "in business" with Kevin, but how stupid does he think we are? Perhaps he's telling the truth about not being a direct affiliate in the CD scheme, but I'm willing to bet that Joe does have a pretty big stake in the scheme for which the CD set is an upsell (more on that momentarily).

Or at the very least, Kevin has led Joe to believe he's going to reap a multitude of benefits from said scheme. I have the strong sense that Kevin is going to make even more money on this one than he already has, and Joe...well, not so much.

Even in the short term, it appears that Kevin made money merely from attending that dinner at Joe's "private club" (that would be the Vitale Cigar Bar) in Wimberley. (I can imagine Kevin paraphrasing Joe's email: "I was not going to let this opportunity go by without draining these gullible tools of every bit of scratch I could get out of them.") Here's Joe's buddy Pat O'Bryan, waxing enthusiastic on his blog about that historic session with True-dough (Pat shot a video of the momentous occasion):
In this video, Kevin talks about what he’s learned. Some of it is pretty mind-bending. Some of it I flat out don’t believe. Some… well, I’ve made a couple of purchases since this dinner. Everybody I’ve talked to who was there has changed something about their lives -- either added supplements, changed diet, or ordered an e-pendant. I did all three.
An e-pendant to go with your Russian Wish Dolly, Pat... that's great.**
Okay, so what is this "Your Wish Is Your Command" program, and how much is it going to cost you, since you're not Joe Vitale and probably will not be able to get it for free? Well, let's discuss cost first. You can get it for one payment of only $299.00, or ten easy payments of $39.95 each. [Note: The price was later changed to one payment of only $297.00 or ten easy payments of $39.70 each. Why the difference? Simply because prices ending in "7" are widely considered to be more attractive to online consumers, according to the Hype-notic Marketing Playbook.]

That's a heck of a deal, especially when you consider what "Your Wish Is Your Command" really is at its core: an elaborate upsell scheme that will give you an unprecedented opportunity to spend even more money by joining True-dough's Global Information Network (GIN) scheme, as
previously discussed here on this very Whirled. See, Joe isn't the only one who can repeat links.

Just for good measure, here's that Whirled link again. Hypnotic, yes?
As for whether or not Joe is in business with Kevin (which, as you recall, he claimed he isn't), take a look at this June 2009 blog post:

Back in America. Just had a wonderful dinner with my friend Joe Vitale and a few other mutual friends. Joe is a star from the movie and book “The Secret”. He’s an amazing guy and one of the “insiders” in the Global Information Network. Associating with people who think the right way, possessing secret knowledge, and having the results to prove it works rubs off. Joe is genuine, a giver, fun, and can help you achieve your dreams. Would you like to meet him? Join the Global Information Network and be able to meet Joe and winners like him! To sign up, you MUST type in this affiliate code: ‘KTRN’.
But I've teased you long enough, and that's not very hypnotic. Here is the link that will lead you to the CD set revealing the secrets that Kevin himself learned in The Brotherhood. That is the link to the main sales page. (There's an affiliate version as well; type in /010 or /012 at the end of the previous link and you'll get to it.)

On both pages Kevin mentions an exclusive workshop he held in the Swiss Alps, an event for which he says 100 folks paid upwards of $10,000 apiece to attend. On one page he describes it as an event "that changed the entire landscape of success and how to achieve literally anything in life."
When the fireworks were over and the dust had settled just 2 days later, every person agreed that it was the most epic two days of their lives.

They all agreed that what they paid to attend the event paled in comparison to what the information they gleaned during those two days would do in their lives. (You can read their rabid testimonials further down on this page.)
Rabid? Well, that explains a lot.

Okay, now, that whole "rabid" bit is one example of what I mentioned in my little prelude above. It's no longer on either version of the sales page, as far as I can see.

Anyway, so far on that page there are only a few testimonials, and as far as I can tell these are from people who listened to the CD set, not folks who supposedly attended that exclusive summit in the Alps.

The above is another item that has apparently changed. On the main sales page (the one without the affiliate extension), there are now quite a few "testimonials" in a section under the header, "Here's what some of the attendees said." As there is no mention of the CD set in this section, these testimonials are all presumably from people who attended that exclusive $10,000 or $11,000 (or however much it was) event in the Alps. The testimonials (which have no attributions) mention such things as, “I used the technique taught and put REAL cash in my pocket in 24 hours!!” and “I would have paid 1 million dollars for this knowledge! I own a business and with this information my profits will go up 100 fold this year! In the first week I have already increased my profits over $50,000!”

Is it just me, or does that sound kind of small-time for people who can afford to attend an exclusive event in the Swiss Alps, taught by Kevin and a few big international tycoons and such?

But the important point is that Kevin does indeed go on a bit about secret societies, 'splainin':
For more than 30 years, I’ve been lucky enough to be a member of one such secret society. The ultra-secretive “Brotherhood” society. It’s [sic] members include some of the most successful people on the planet. They’re all mega-millionaires…billionaires…high-level government officials…heads of entire countries…33rd degree Freemasons (the highest ranking of all masons)…captains of industry (Andrew Carnegie and Aristotle Onassis were members of The Brotherhood)…and believe it or not, even members of Royal families.
And here we have yet another example of changing sales copy. If you read the copy above – which I swear was on one version of the sales page when I first wrote this – you would think that Kevin has been a member of The Brotherhood for thirty years and is still a member. Since he is only 46 (having been born in February of 1963), that would mean that he has been a member of this secret society since he was sixteen. This would mean that he was a member of The Brotherhood when he was all down and out, when he was unhappy, when he was going through hard times, when he was convicted of fraud and imprisoned for two years, and so on. This would not exactly be consistent with the story he now tells on the sales page, which is that when he was younger, he was approached and invited to become a member of The Brotherhood, and he became a member, and once he became a member his luck changed almost overnight.

Frankly, I am having a little trouble keeping his stories straight, and so, apparently, is he. Or maybe he just has some copywriting challenges. As I noted above, however, the story really doesn't seem to matter. What matters is his sheer genius, which became apparent to him soon after he joined The Brotherhood, and which he modestly describes for us:

I studied and learned the secrets (ONLY available to members) with more passion than anyone ever had in their history! It turned out I was gifted with the unique ability, much like Einstein, at “crunching” or simplifying complex concepts and making them easy to understand and apply. I totally integrated the “secrets” into my whole being and life! I APPLIED and USED this powerful, never before published, knowledge in my own REAL LIFE!
By the way, on the main sales page Kevin now promises that he will explain why he was chosen for The Brotherhood, and why he chose to leave the 'Hood.
Remember, I WAS a member of the “Brotherhood” secret society! I am NO LONGER a member! I LEFT! NOBODY has EVER left the society! NO ONE has EVER shared their secrets! Many powerful people are FURIOUS that I am exposing and revealing the SECRETS of one of the most powerful secret societies of all time! (Again, I’ll tell you why I left later.)

Well, I sure was interested in hearing that story. But I scanned the copy and couldn't find either an explanation of why he was invited in the first place or an explanation of why he left. In all fairness, he didn't specify how much later he would 'splain. Perhaps his copywriters are still working on that part of the tale.

Once I finally learned the right information from the Brotherhood, billionaires, the politically elite, captains of industry and the members of the Illuminati, Freemasons, The Skull and Bones and other secret societies, I cracked the success code.
And now I live an exciting, fun and free life filled with financial wealth and happiness.
In case you are still not convinced and are prepared to dismiss the copy as mere hype, Kevin begs you, for your own good, to reconsider.
Please do not discount what I’m saying here. The strategies I revealed at this groundbreaking event are absolutely not theory. They’ve worked unfailingly for the thousands of lucky members in these secret societies. They’ve worked unfailingly in my life.
I went from a defeated, unsuccessful, high school dropout with more than $100,000 in credit card debts to living in some of the most affluent communities in the world. I’ve driven expensive cars like Rolls Royce‘s, Bentley’s and Ferrari‘s. I own a number of different, wildly successful businesses that routinely make tens of millions of dollars for me year in and year out.
These strategies worked for me…they’ve worked for the billionaire friends I brought along to teach their words of wisdom at the event…they’ve worked for untold thousands of members who huddle together in secret societies like the Skull and Bones…The Brotherhood…The Freemasons…and others. And they will work unfailingly for you, too.
The PS on the page will sound pretty familiar to anyone who has read Joe Vitale's sales copy:
PS -- What if I’m right? What if this time next year your dreams of wealth, health, success, and personal happiness and bliss have come true? Getting your hands on this breakthrough material will have been the smartest move you’ve ever made, right?
Shades of "What if it works?" Geez, all of these hypnotic copywriters sure do write hypnotically, don't they? I guess that's why they make the big bucks.

Once again: disappeared...poof! I can't find that darned PS on either version of the page now. Go figure.

A few other items of note on Kevin's main sales page. In one portion he has a list of the incredible things that happened once he applied what he calls the "5 second miracle," which, of course, he learned from The Brotherhood, and will teach you too, for a price. He said that things began to turn around for him almost overnight. Within days, he was dating beautiful sexy women. He soon got out of debt, and started making more money than he could ever have dreamed, and he got really healthy and lost weight, and had luxury cars and homes, and began traveling, and heck, was just "living a stress-free, magical life!" And here are some other things that started happening to him:
I also felt he [sic] could “read minds” and felt totally in control of all situations and people.
I have since made MILLIONS and have enjoyed a lifestyle that most people could not even imagine.
Notice that third-person pronoun in the second item? Either Kevin is having a multiple-personality experience, or he's talking about someone else, or his copywriters forgot to edit the copy they lifted from elsewhere. Tsk, tsk. Well, I imagine that copy will change too, as soon as his people get around to reading this blog post.

The major theme running through the "Your Wish Is Your Command" gimmick, and for that matter all of Kevin's body of work over the past fifteen years or so, is that there is a wealth of information out there, but "the elite" (or big government or big Pharma or Western medicine or what have you) are all deliberately withholding this info from the masses in order to keep them in a subservient role. As we know, this marketing strategy worked for Rhonda Byrne, having formed the bedrock of the promotions for The Secret, but Kevin's mastery of the forbidden-information angle puts Rhonda's puny little efforts to shame.

The forbidden-info theme has been embraced not only in the New-Wage bidness that Kevin reviles on one hand but exploits on the other, but on various wingnutty forums as well, such as that of radio host Alex Jones, another one of True-dough's b.f.f.'s. The following is from an article not written by Jones, but appearing on his web site:
...Trudeau shockingly detailed conversations with elitists during which they brazenly admitted their desire for massive global population reduction.
Kevin, of course, is fiercely fighting the elitists' plans to eliminate dumb people, knowing that he has to protect and preserve his customer base. I imagine this is mighty reassuring to the dumb or the merely gullible, but even more compelling is Kevin's reassurance that despite the claims of the naysayers (Duff McDuffee, for example), anyone can "have it all":
Well, here’s good news. You can have it all. You can live in a beautiful home in an affluent community. You can drive the car of your dreams. You can wear expensive, stylish clothes. You can be tearfully happy. You can be the rich and successful person God intended you to be. In short, you can live your life…on your terms! You can have, be, or do whatever your heart desires.
How? By getting your hands on the recordings of the blockbusting event I held in Switzerland…
Now, even assuming that Kevin's motives are altruistic (stop snickering and work with me here for a moment, okay?), let's take a look at what he says on the site for his really BIG scheme, the Global Information Network, or GIN. If you didn't follow the links to that site in my previous post about this scheme, do so now. On the "Who We Are" page, Trudeau notes:
The Creed of the Global Information Network is:
  • Every person on earth has the right to know all the knowledge available on planet earth
  • Every person on earth has the right to pursue happiness
  • Every person on earth has the right to be free to pursue his own dreams, goals, and desires
  • Every person on earth has the right to know ALL the methods of curing and preventing disease and have dynamic vibrant health.
  • Every person on earth has the right to know how to use their mind to create and manifest in their lives whatever they choose
  • Every person on earth has the right to privacy from all governments and corporate entities
  • Every person on earth has the right to be happy, secure, safe, and fulfilled as a human being
  • Every person on earth has the same importance as every other person
  • Every person on earth can have, be or do anything they desire
  • The privileged elite class has NO right to hide the truth from the masses and keep them as virtual slaves
  • Freedom of speech, freedom to express ideas, opinions, and what individuals believe to be statements of fact even if it is against worldwide consensus should never be impeded.
And then there's this...
The Global Information Network’s goal is to be the worldwide communication center that will spread previously secret and hidden knowledge that has been used by the ruling classes to keep the world uninformed, full of fear, impoverished and enslaved.
By educating the world with this secret data, The Global Information Network hopes to empower people to have, be or do everything and anything they desire. By doing so, happiness will increase, fear will fall away, people will become more prosperous than ever before, poverty, slavery, and despair will begin to vanish from the planet and violence and wars will cease to exist on planet earth.
I have one question: If everyone on the planet has the right to this information, and every person on earth has the same importance as every other person...well, since it's clear that not everyone can afford to join GIN and climb the ranks of membership, why doesn't Kevin just make all of the information freely available to everyone, with no membership levels, no fees, no sign-ups? Why doesn't he simply publish all of that information on an easily accessible web site? Why create an "elite" group at all? After all, he's said himself that he doesn't need any more money because he already has plenty.

While you're pondering that question, here's another: Just how much does it cost to be a member of Kevin's exclusive group? That one I can answer ...well, sort of. Check out the "Levels of Membership" page, if you've not done so already. There are twelve levels of membership, starting with Level 1. To be a Level 1 member requires a $1,000 "initiation fee," with $150 monthly dues. For that you get "Access to Membership Level 1 sections of the GIN web site." Other benefits are "classified." As for the remaining eleven levels, both the costs and benefits are listed as "classified."

How do you make money as a GIN member, possibly enabling you to live the life of luxury Kevin himself brags about? I quoted and linked to this page on my previous GIN post, but here 'tis again.
For everyone you get to join GIN as a member, or another way of saying it, for everyone you get to buy a membership in GIN, you are paid $200 commission. If you get just 5 people to join GIN as a member, you make $1000. That covers your initial membership dues. If you get 10 people to join GIN as a member, you make $2000. If you get 100 people to join GIN as a member you make $20,000. Anytime and every time you get someone to become a member in GIN you earn $200 commission. Because of the experts that are behind the GIN opportunity and their unparalleled successful track record generating over 100 Billion dollars in sales worldwide, we have insider marketing secrets using the internet and mass media marketing that can help you to potentially get many people to join as new GIN members. WE will provide you with all the secrets that can teach you how some members have signed up as many as 1000 new GIN members in just 60 days earning over $400,000 in just 60 days!
With the power of our specialized and proprietary marketing techniques, you could be earning thousands of dollars a month on this single bonus!
But that is just the beginning. Every person you sign up or “sponsor” is “tagged” to you, and has the same commission plan as you and all the same incentives and money making opportunities. The people you sign up or sponsor want to make money too! They will be taught how THEY can go and sell memberships, sponsor, or sign people up as members in GIN. When they sign up a new member or sell a membership they of course make their $200 commission just as you did when you signed up a new GIN member, but YOU ALSO get $200 on all the new members THEY get to join GIN!
Is this a pyramid scheme? Well, if it looks like a duck... The point is probably moot anyway, since GIN is a company based on the West Indies isle of Nevis, presumably beyond the bounds of US law. (And do follow that link in the previous sentence; it will give you much more insight about Nevis as a business paradise than I am providing here.) More importantly for Kevin, there are probably boatloads of folks whose eyes will be on the imagined prize, and they won't care about those picky little details.

To sweeten the GIN mix even more for the chronically gullible, True-dough has cooked up a tale of a "GIN Council," a group of 29 other ultra-successful, ultra-elite billionaires who co-founded GIN with him and are on the advisory board. The clear implication is that if you advance far enough in GIN (i.e., if you give put enough money into this seekrit klub), you may even be able to hang around some of these elites yourself.

"And educated grownups actually believe this drivel?!?" some of you may be asking.

But fear not: there's still hope for the human race. When it comes to True-dough, there are plenty of doubters (I know, I know, he welcomes the controversy). Look at some of the comments on this discussion that took place in March 2009 on one of his own forums, apparently in relation to a mail-out advertising that famous "new" CD set he Joe Vitale is now pushing. (If it's not the same set, it nonetheless makes use of the "Secret Brotherhood" motif and apparently costs the same as that set.) 

And, of course, scads of bloggers are doubters as well, such as Stupid Evil Bastard

These are all well and good, but I'm thinking that maybe it's time for a parody of that dinner in Wimberley, on the order of this small classic, which I've also linked to previously but loved it so much that I am linking to it again:

I don't know about you, but while True-dough wrings every bit of profit he can from the Secret Brotherhood/GIN Council theme, I am eagerly awaiting his next tall tale. Maybe he can hire me to make something up for him. I am pretty creative, and the same rich mines of inspiration that nourish this blog could certainly enrich Kevin's ad copy. Meanwhile, you'll have to excuse me. It's time for me to prepare for a private meeting of the Secret Society of Snarky Bloggers and Knowledgeable Informants. There's a lot brewing, more than I could possibly tell you in one post... but I'm going to make you wait for it.

PS ~ While you're waiting, if you want to kill some time on a blog written by someone who knows a lot more about Internet marketing and Internet marketers than I do, pay a visit to Salty Droid's blog. The language is not for those with delicate sensibilities, but if you don't have a problem with that, you'll have a good time with SD, who is on a mission to expose the scams and the scammers.

PPS ~ And on a related note, here's a great article about Internet "gurus" and the law, as well as an article from the same site that illuminates "pig sty marketing." My only complaint re the latter is that it sort of insults the pig, an animal I've grown rather fond of since I've been living out in the sticks. (Thanks to Burned By Fire for the Tweets leading me to these).

PPPS ~ Okay, I see the GoogleAd at the top of this post. Not my doing; blame the Adbots.

PPPPS ~ Speaking of entertaining tales, a friend reminded me of some information about Kevin True-dough that I had linked to in a previous post but that I think bears linking to again. First, here's a 2005 article about how True-dough got started on a path of crime (I mean, "mistakes"). Good golly, it seems that it all had to do with his being adopted and his adoptive parents not being completely forthright with him about it. Second, there is a 12-page "Smoking Gun" piece entitled, "Would You Buy A Used Cure From This Man?" It's quite revealing. What I found most interesting: A three-page April 1991 letter from a psychiatrist pleading True-dough's case to the authorities (here's the link to page 1; each page has its own link). The letter features classic shrink-rap rationalizations such as: "Mr. Trudeau's drive to succeed has been so intense that it has on numerous occasions impaired his judgment," and "His offenses have stemmed from an inappropriate urgency to succeed..." Another classic: a six-page missive from Mama, pleading leniency (and again, here's the link to the first page of that letter).

Am I the only one in the room who has an urge to break out singing, "Gee, Officer Krupke" from West Side Story? (Lyrics here, if you don't want to watch the vid.) That last line in particular seems to mirror True-dough's own attitude towards the authorities that have tried to squelch his ambitions.
PPPPPS ~ This December 14 post on the AlterNet blog does a good job of 'splainin' our perennial fascination with "secret societies."

Update, 19 February 2010 ~ As you may know, there's more trouble in True-dough Paradise, and once again he's fighting to stay out of jail. He was found in contempt of court earlier this month after urging his followers to send supportive emails to a judge, Robert Gettleman, who was hearing his FTC case (you know, the one where the FTC fined him $37 million, which True-dough has declared he is "never going to pay"). Judge Gettleman's computer and BlackBerry were shut down as a result of being deluged with emails from indignant True-dough fans, and some of the sharper tools in the shed actually sent threats to the judge. Oops! Following the contempt charge, True-dough issued an apology, saying the email campaign was "a mistake," and urging his followers not to email the judge after all. Still, he had to surrender his passport and may be facing a month in the slammer.
But the unstoppable True-dough sent this email out to his supporters on February 18, a mere week after all of that contempt nonsense:
Dear [Name],
Thank you for listening and supporting the Kevin Trudeau Radio show. As a supporter of my radio show, I think you are special.
I'm writing to you today, to share some information about an opportunity that could change your life dramatically within the next 90 days.
If you are lucky, maybe once in your lifetime, a day will come where you will have the chance to get in on the ground floor of a moneymaking opportunity that can almost guarantee your success!
Today is that day.
In 1996, I launched a multi-level marketing business opportunity.
The company was publicly traded on NASDAQ with a stock price of just 50 cents. In about 18 months, an estimated 200,000 people joined me in this MLM program. Gross sales exceeded $250,000,000. The stock price went to $35.
Many people that joined with me in the beginning made millions. I bet you wish you were one of the lucky people I invited to join me at the very beginning of that amazing launch.
I am writing to you now to announce that I'm doing it again!
This time, myself and over 30 of my very wealthy friends from around the world, are launching a brand new ground floor opportunity of a lifetime...The Global Information Network (GIN).
The Global Information Network is a private exclusive club. It is a members-only organization. It is by invitation only. It helps its members create wealth and financial freedom.
I'm personally inviting you to join and become a member of The Global Information Network.
This private member-only organization can help you achieve wealth and have, be or do everything and anything you've ever desired....
...For the first time in history, an opportunity of this type is being launched all over the world at the same time. This is totally ground floor. This is brand new. You are among the very first people to be hearing about this. Already in just the last few months, people have joined as members of the Global Information Network in over 100 countries. Those who get in on the ground floor of these types of opportunities are said to have the chance to make the most money...
...90 days from today you could be making more money than you ever imagined.
This is the most revolutionary membership organization and moneymaking opportunity I've ever seen. Nothing like this has ever been done before. It has a multi-level marketing twist that could make this the fastest growing organization of its kind, of all time.
The most amazing part of this system is that you never have to bug friends, relatives, neighbors or coworkers. In fact, you virtually never have to talk to anyone. You could potentially make hundreds of thousands of dollars in your underwear, without ever leaving your house.
Remember, this just started a few months ago. I have met with members all around the world. This is the real deal. You can get in at the beginning of the beginning. This is a totally ground floor once in a lifetime opportunity. I believe millionaires will come out of the GIN membership faster than any other organization of its kind...ever.
In just the last few months, people are already making huge money. One member made over $148,200 his first month and $288,600 in his second...
...You could be potentially developing a permanent monthly residual income. You could achieve financial freedom and independence. Imagine making $5000, $10,000, $20,000 or even $50,000 per month, without ever leaving your home.
This is not a get rich quick scheme and there are no guarantees. Review all the information for yourself. ...
...The membership benefits of the Global Information Network are something that up until now have been reserved for the privileged elite class.
The moneymaking component of the Global Information Network is simple, powerful and works.
...Submit your membership application today. You must use affiliate code... and you must sign up by Friday, February 19th, 2010.
Once you sign up as a member, I will show you exactly how one member made over $400,000 in 90 days. What he did was simple. I will show you how he did it.
Plus, because I really want you to achieve all of your dreams, I will be teaching a one-day seminar on May 8th in Chicago entitled "How Anyone Can Make Millions: The Moneymaking Secrets They Don't Want You to Know About." I will tell you exactly what I did to generate over 3 billion dollars in sales worldwide. These are moneymaking secrets I have never revealed before. The tickets for this event will be $5000 each. If you become a member of the Global Information Network by Friday, February 19th, 2010, you will get a ticket to this event absolutely free. If for some reason you cannot go to the event live, I will send you the audio recording of the event, so you can still get all the information presented.
Become a member of the Global Information Network today and start making all your dreams come true.
You can do it! I believe in you! Remember, don't let anyone steal your dreams and I will see you on the beaches of the world.

Notice that he sent the email out on the 18th of February, and the deadline for getting the really good deal (e.g., the "free ticket" to the $5,000 May event) is the 19th.

But that's not the main point. Let's backtrack a bit and revisit that marvelous 1996 MLM scheme he mentioned towards the beginning of the letter. This little gem is from a page on that notorious "hater" site, Skepdic, but maybe there's a bit of truth in it anyway.The page is a few years old, but the relevant information about the 1996 scheme is there.
Presumably, Nutrition for Life International Inc. (NFLI) knew about Trudeau's past when it took him on as a business partner. NFLI, an MLM outfit specializing in such things as shark cartilage capsules and other equally beneficial nutritional supplies went into bankruptcy in 2003,* but not before making Trudeau and some other investors very rich.
In less than 10 months, Kevin Trudeau and his marketing organization have persuaded some 15,000 people to plunk down more than $1,000 apiece for a highly touted opportunity to sell products.
The 32-year-old recruiter's delighted business partner, has already granted Mr. Trudeau so many stock options that he has a paper profit of more than $11 million. (Emshwiller 1996)
NFLI, which at one time traded on the NASDAQ for $35 a share, had sales of over $32 million in 1995. Then trouble hit:
On Aug. 23, 1996, a class action lawsuit was filed in the District Court of Harris County, Texas, on behalf of purchasers of the common stock and common stock purchase warrants of Nutrition for Life International, Inc. (NFLI) during the period July 11, 1995 through July 16, 1996, inclusive (the Class Period). The complaint charges NFLI, certain of its officers and directors, the lead underwriters of its July 11, 1995 offering of stock and warrants, and a major marketer/distributor Kevin Trudeau and the Trudeau Marketing Group Inc. (collectively Trudeau) with violations of Texas statutory and common law, by, among other things, misrepresenting and/or omitting material information concerning NFLI's business, marketing efforts, sales and earnings during the Class Period (07/11/1995 through 07/11/1996). In August 1997, the case settled. The company agreed to pay $2,000,000 in cash to individuals who purchased common stock and warrants during the class period. The company also agreed to pay the plaintiffs attorney fees up to $600,000.00.*
Even so, some people are still recruiting for NFLI. And Trudeau is still going strong...

Meanwhile, True-dough's legions of fans continue to indignantly defend him, claiming that the real bad guys in this situation are the government, Big Pharma, the medical profession, the mainstream media, the critics, and so forth. Same song, different verse.
Another update, 2 March 2010: I finally got a chance to watch True-dough's latest infomercial for his "Your Wish Is Your Command" CD set a couple of nights ago. Here's a link to a scathing review of the infomercial, with embedded vids so you can watch it yourself.

Among the highlights I'd noticed while watching the infomercial in my half-asleep state, and later confirmed by visiting the site I inked to in the paragraph above:
  • KT repeatedly says he is now offering the CD set for 70 % off the regular price, but he never mentions what the regular price is. Folks watching the infomercial who don't have Internet access or don't feel like going online can only find out the price by calling the toll-free number (be sure you have your credit card handy!). And as you know if you've done any research at all on KT, people are constantly complaining about calling those numbers to order one KT product and getting signed up for some forced-continuity deal from which it is nearly impossible to extract themselves. It remains to be seen if the new (as of December 2009) FTC regs will slow this down at all.
  • KT says more than once that there are two types of people: those who are happy like he is, and "losers." He says that if you're unhappy with your own life and you don't buy his CD set, that means you're a loser. (Shades of that radio interview he had with Mr. Fire last July.)
  • He mentions that The Secret was inspired by Napoleon Hill's Think and Grow Rich, but Rhonda Byrne has most often credited Wallace Wattles' The Science of Getting Rich. As he did in the copy on the web pages, though, in the infomercial True-dough pretty much throws all self-help authors under the bus. And why shouldn't he? After all, True-dough alone has the missing secret to real and lasting success.
  • Although he'd previously been a bit cagey about exactly when he was a member of the "secret society" that supposedly formed some of the basis of the info in the CD set, in this infomercial he says he was a member from 1975 to 1999. Well, he was born in 1963, which means he was only twelve when he joined the Brotherhood. Wow, what a prodigy! In addition, he was in prison a couple of years for fraud in the early 1990s (a fact that I think he forgot to mention on the infomercial), so, clearly, being a member of that secret society didn't keep him out of the joint.
For me, all of this just raises the question: Is anyone in True-dough's operation paying any attention at all to these inconsistencies? Or does KT simply not care, because he is banking on the fact that the majority of his audience won't bother to do any research, or will be too drunk or stoned or otherwise medicated, or simply sleep-addled, when they're watching his infomercials to do anything but pick up the phone and give someone that credit card number?

As far as "losers" are concerned, I think that blogger Paul Lucas, who wrote the infomercial review I linked to above, was spot-on in his comments about the patently absurd promo video for True-dough's big product, the Global Information Network (this vid is also available on the infomercial review page):

Mr. Trudeau, I would like to humbly suggest an alternative definition for a “loser” than the one you have offered. A loser is someone who listens to the above pitch for the Global Information network and imagines he’s going to be some sort of James Bond, hobnobbing with Ernst Stavro Blofeld and Auric Goldfinger over martinis inside some subterranean lair deep beneath the Swiss Alps.

Please tell me that people aren't really stupid enough to fall for those outlandish promises delivered in a phony accent. Or...wait...maybe it's all just a joke and Kevin is merely waiting for the rest of us to "get it." Yeah, that has to be it.

By the way, a tip of the tinfoil hat to Paul Lucas, who was way ahead of me on the Kevin True-dough/secret society connections (I just "discovered" him yesterday, March 1, while looking for links to True-dough's latest infomercial). Here's a link to a June 2009 post of his, "Kevin Trudeau Becomes a Colonel in the Tin-foil Hat Brigade." At the end of his posts are links to others on the same topic. Happy reading!
Yet another update, 19 August 2010: The delightful Smoking Gun blog ("serving the best stupid news and 5 fresh dumb criminals each week!") posted a piece on August 16 about True-dough. Not that True-dough is dumb by any means, but some of the things he writes most assuredly are. While the author mentions that Kevin has yet to pay a penny of his eight-figure fine to the FTC,*** the piece mainly focuses on some of the quirky internal memoranda that Kevin has distributed to his employees over the years. Most notable, IMO: His emphatic endorsement of Scientology (click on pic for enlargement).

* Thank you to several alert readers who sent me the heads-up on Mr. Fire's latest True-dough email. By the way, Joe also published a blog post entitled "Kevin Trudeau's Secret Wish" on the same day he sent the email. And as it happens, Joe kind of answers the question I asked above, regarding why Kevin is charging for the Secret Information that everyone supposedly has an inborn right to possess, instead of just making it freely accessible on the Internet. Joe 'splains it thusly: "He's committed to making a difference in the world. He wants to make a profit while doing so, but that's the entrepreneurial mindset." Okey-dokey, now I understand. By the way, the meta-tag title on Joe's blog post (the title that appears at the top of the screen) is, "The Kevin Trudeau They Don't Want You To Know." Of course, this is a play on several of True-dough's book titles, but more than that, it is also an implication that the big bad "They" don't want you to know that in truth Kevin True-dough is a passionate, sincere man who only wants to help make this old world a better place.

** Okay, I don't know for certain if Kevin benefited directly from sales of the E-pendant or, for that matter, any of the supplements that the attendees at the private dinner felt inspired to begin taking. I just suspect that because Kevin is involved in numerous companies, and seems to have very specific recommendations for just about anything that ails you, it's highly plausible that he would indeed benefit in some way when people follow his recommendations. It appears to me that, like Joe Vitale, he rarely does anything unless there's something in it for him.

*** Apparently Kevin has no intention of paying his fines, instead electing to play the role of freedom-of-speech martyr to the hilt. He even devotes major space on his main web site to begging his followers to send him money to help pay his legal bills.

* * * * *
Now more than ever, your donation is needed
to help keep this Whirled spinning.
Click here to donate via PayPal or debit/credit card.
If that link doesn't work, send PayPal payment directly to
or to


Duff said...

Awesome snarky reporting, CC!

This part in particular was the funniest thing I've read in a while:


Keep on rockin' the boat, and see you at that top secret meeting. ;)


Karl said...

Vitale, obviously hasn't heard the truism "If you lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas".

Cosmic Connie said...

Duff said:
"Keep on rockin' the boat, and see you at that top secret meeting. ;)"

Don't forget your secret decoder ring and your special affiliate code!

Cosmic Connie said...

Karl said...

"Vitale, obviously hasn't heard the truism 'If you lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas'."

I think he heard it but thought that last word was "fleece," and he saw another business op.

Anonymous said...


Royal Families?

Nah. Here's the magic 5 step formula for being a rich and famous royal.

1. Look around at neighbouring Kingdoms.
2. Compare you army with that belonging to your neighbour.
3. If yours is stronger, invade.
4. Grab all the goodies, plant your flag and call the land yours.
5. Gloat and preen.

Simple really, no secret there.

Anonymous said...

This is so laughable. Kevin True-Dough states at the top of his site:

"Former member of the legendary Brotherhood secret society breaks his silence and REVEALS…

The closely guarded, PROVEN money making & success secrets that the wealthy, powerful and influential DON’T want you to know about!"

Whether he were a member of any of the aforrementioned "secret societies" or not, if he were to reveal any of their secrets, they would slit his throat.

He talks a good game, but he doesn't know these "societies" like he touts them on his site. The stuff they publish in their books for their own members is only for the neophytes.

The "adepts" don't write anything down: they're taught to remember everything by oral teaching, and then pass it down to the lower degrees.

True-Dough is truly a dupe.

mojo said...

Reading Duff's pull quote above (first comment), all I can say is... I smell a Vitale drinking game! (Or something. Maybe something died in the wall.)

Problem is, if folks started taking shots every time, say, his hands shook with excitement ... or he used a single short sentence for a complete paragraph ... or announced that people's lives were going to be forever changed thanks to his "discovery" ... or just every time he uses the word "celebrity" the way most eight year old girls use the word "pony" ... well, there'd be a lot of really drunk people staggering around. More so than usual.

Besides, I overdid it in college once and the taste of alcohol makes me sick to my stomach. Not to mention the cumulative effect of reading stuff like this tends to have on my digestive system.

So you younger kids go ahead and have fun. Just don't come crying to me when you need a new liver. Like, next week.

elaine said...

So the brotherhood does allow chicks? Cool! How do I get in on this?


chriscrosdale said...

Great post as always. Someone needs to make a documentary (maybe a mini-series) focusing on these guys--fascinating stuff.

Cosmic Connie said...

Anon 7:58 PM (re royal families):

That's definitely a time-tested five-step formula, though it does leave one open to assassination attempts and uprisings and such.

Cosmic Connie said...

Anonymous 12: 09 AM said...

"This is so laughable...

"...Whether he were a member of any of the aforrementioned "secret societies" or not, if he were to reveal any of their secrets, they would slit his throat...

...True-Dough is truly a dupe."

But don't you see, that's part of his marketing ploy. He knows enough about secret societies (or at least about the rumors thereof) to know all of that, but his shtick revolves around convincing his marks that the information is so important that he just cannot in good conscience keep it from the masses. A major theme in his story (as well as in his previous tales) is that he is putting himself at grave risk for the sake of "the people." That is, as long as the people have a valid credit or debit card.

No, he's no dupe, at least not by the definition of the word as I understand it, i.e., "a person who is tricked or swindled." I'd say he's on the giving rather than the receiving end of that process.

Cosmic Connie said...

Mojo, when I read the words, "Vitale drinking game," my first thought was that you were concerned that JV's shaky hands were a result of DT's. I thought, geez, how did she know?!? Then as I read further I got your meaning. You're right: if people played that game around JV there would be tons of destroyed livers.

Cosmic Connie said...

elaine said...

"So the brotherhood does allow chicks? Cool! How do I get in on this?"

Good question. If The Brotherhood does allow women they should have the decency to rename it The Siblinghood.

In any case I am sure Kevin T would tell you that you don't need to join The Bro-hood; you just need to buy and buy and buy and buy and buy and buy and buy and buy from him. After all he's The Keeper of the Forbidden Secrets.

Cosmic Connie said...

chriscrosdale said...


Thanks, Chris. I wouldn't be surprised to see more than one documentary in the works, especially in the wake of the James Ray death-lodge affair.

Anonymous said...

Well, I'll give True-D'oh one thing. His informercials cured my insomnia. I'm usually asleep before they're over.

Anonymous said...


Now, what kind of a strange, commie-like idea is that?

Connie, if you want Mr. Turdough to ever hire you, you have to abandon these harmful, defeatist thinking habits, starting ASAP.

Think big. Think rich. Think like a member of a secret society that believes the moon is made of cheese. Anything and everything's possible. :)

Cosmic Connie said...

Anon 11:53 PM said:


See? That's "The Insomnia Cure THEY Don't Want You To Know About!"

Cosmic Connie said...

Elizabeth wrote:


But I would think he would hire me for my talents, not my beliefs. As long as my copy (which would have his name on it, not mine) got people to abandon all reason and whip out their credit cards, my personal beliefs wouldn't be an issue.

In any case, I just added something to my first footnote to the post, but I probably should have worked it into the main body of the piece. Apparently I'd previously overlooked Joe's blog post about KT's CD set. That post was also dated December 3 (I swear it wasn't up there when I checked while I was working on my own post), and in it JV says this about True-dough, "He's committed to making a difference in the world. He wants to make a profit while doing so, but that's the entrepreneurial mindset."

So I have my answer. It's that "entrepreneurial mindset" that compels True-dough to keep charging for information that is every human being's birthright. The man can't help himself (she writes, realizing that this could easily veer off into a SHAMbloggy discussion on free will v. determinism)...

disillusioned said...

A rose by any other name.....

I've never felt the pull of the secret brotherhood stuff, too blatant by half, but now that Kevin has been rechristened Turdough I find myself mildly fascinated. Perhaps he has hidden depths after all.

Poor Joe must be feeling the recession in his list if he is admitting that his marketing is to make money rather his usual schtick of heroically bringing untold wonders and benefits to mankind, or perhaps he's been at the 'mothers ruin'?

Anonymous said...

ViTally and Falsedough might get to be featured on serial fruitcake David Yucke's Iluminati hit list.

Anonymous said...



Cosmic Connie said...

LOL, Disillusioned. Actually, though, for a very long time Joe has been open about the fact that he is interested in making money. For the past several years, as he became more successful, he has been more assertively promoting the idea that making money is a spiritual issue and that Buddha, God, etc. want all of us to be rich. (And more than once he has made the claim that those who criticize his materialism do so only because they believe wealth and wealthy people are evil. He doesn't seem to be able to accept the fact that many folks just find his bragging to be annoyingly transparent.)

Of course, the other part of Joe's shtick is his claim that he really does want to bring hope and inspiration to the human race. He would have us believe that this is his primary motivation, and many of his followers are apparently buying into it.

Cosmic Connie said...

Anonymous 6:10 PM said...

"ViTally and Falsedough might get to be featured on serial fruitcake David Yucke's Iluminati hit list."

Oh, let's hope not. I would hate to lose some of my best blog fodder.

Everyone else: here's what Anon is referring to:

Here is a post that specifically mentions the "Illuminati hit list":

Cosmic Connie said...

Anonymous 3:29 PM said...

"'Kevin, of course, is fiercely fighting the elitists' plans to eliminate dumb people, knowing that he has to protect and preserve his customer base...'


TY, Anon. What's sad is that so many people look up to KT as a hero. Whether that qualifies them as dumb or merely gullible (or desperate), I don't know.

Cosmic Connie said...

BTW, everyone, a friend of mine pointed out a link to some information on Kevin True-dough that I'd almost forgotten. This is from back in the early 1990s when he was having some legal troubles that ultimately landed him in prison. I had linked to the information in a previous post on KT but decided to link again. It's in the PPPPS.

If you follow the links I provide you may find yourself asking, in all seriousness, what the difference is between a support system and a group of enablers. (And hey, we all need people to believe in us, and I'm all for giving folks a second or even a third or possibly a fourth chance, but... well, just read the material, think about all the stuff that KT has been involved in since 1991, and decide for yourself.)

Anonymous said...

Where does this crap end?

These people are pathological parasite who prey on innocent people and charmingly offer the world with greasy hands. It gives you the creeps that they stoop to such levels to sell anything to anyone just for MONEY.

There is not a stitch of christianity in anything that they are doing and yet they continue to fly the I can do shit to anyone and God will still love me banner to an audience of smitten fools.

That aussie guy Schirmer even thinks he is God on earth. He is the weirdest character...

Cosmic Connie said...

Anon 6:06 PM: I pretty much agree with your opinion, but I don't think that Kevin Trudeau, Joe Vitale, or most of my other New-Wage snargets are trying to brand themselves specifically as Christians, at least not in the blatant way that our friend Schirmer is doing. And I agree with you that from what I know about Schirmer and about Christianity, the two probably shouldn't even be used in the same sentence.

Joe V seems to be more into the trendy SNAG-gy spiritual paths, and Kevin, from what I've seen, pays lip service to God by talking about our God-given right to happiness, which, of course, he can help you achieve if you buy into his endless programs. OTOH, for some time he has recommended squirrelly things such as "Dianetics," the classic work by the founder of Scientology. And now he's mouthing a bit about the spiritual aspects of the Law Of Attraction, so, obviously, he's not above milking the SNAG-spirituality market himself. I haven't explored all of his material but a lot of the stuff on his KT Radio Network site leads me to think he's also reaching out to the paranoid-Christian market, which is another rich mine. If he can just get the Christian-soldier and Quiverfull types in his corner he'll have a HUGE market, because those folks tend to have huge families. (OTOH, they're often poor because of those huge families, so he might be dealing with a blood-out-of-a-turnip situation.)

On the surface there's nothing wrong with bringing spiritual concepts into one's marketing, but we've seen what these hucksters have done with that combo. All too often, when marketing comes in the door, spirituality flies out the window.

Skeptico said...

So the big success secret that is not available to the general public that is only known by world leaders, celebrities etc etc is – Multi Level Marketing.

Where do I sign?

Cosmic Connie said...

Why, I do believe you can get to the sign-up page from any of the pages on the G.I.N. site, which I linked to in my post. But I think you actually have to be "invited" by a Member, or have some sort of special Affiliate Code, in order to complete the sign-up. Just remember that Kevin is risking is life to offer you this information, Buster. Don't take this gift lightly.

Telpo Lendolotoproj said...

Bravo - GREAT post!!

Anonymous said...

Aha, would Mr Skeptico perhaps be kind enough to offer his opinion on this, as the subject is fancy assed in-groups of illuminees?

Anonymous said...

And also, if you are still there, as a reader of your blog and other sceptics I want to know if you have had a mystical experience (bliss, unity, oneness etc), and if not why not?

Cosmic Connie said...

Recent comment on Joe V's blog post about "Kevin Trudeau's Secret Wish"...

Richard Lam December 10, 2009 at 12:30 pm

Hi Joe

I’m surprised you are associating with Kevin Trudeau. He seems to have a long track record of misdeeds, jumping from one product to another as soon as the FTC stops him from promoting one. Have you verifed [sic] that Kevin is or was a member of The Brotherhood.? What about all the fines and cases against him by the FTC? Doesn’t that say something about the honesty of this guy?


Joe's reply:

Joe Vitale December 13, 2009 at 11:17 am

Maybe it says more about the FTC. For me, I like his work and he’s been nothing but honest and generous with me.


'Nuff said.

Cosmic Connie said...

Telpo Lendolotoproj said...

"Bravo - GREAT post!!"

Right back at ya, Telpo...

"Ludicrosity IS its own reward."

Cosmic Connie said...

Anon 12:17 and 6:15 PM: I'll leave it to Mr. Skeptico to answer those questions should he so choose. But I have a feeling he's off ripping astrology a new a--hole.

Anonymous said...

'spect he is.

Anonymous said...

You do know skeptico is Illuminati don't you? He runs the scepticism wing of the science/religion dialectic scam. It keeps the arguments going and the money thinkling into the illuminati publishing house coffers. Why do you think people 'just so happen to send' him all those new age books to sneeringly review?

Cosmic Connie said...

OK, Anon (or may I call you HHH?), NOW it all makes sense. Conspiracies everywhere! :-)

Anonymous said...

What did Lenin say to his co conspirator?
He said (I paraphrase) "In the press we must hate each other, the public should never know we are working together."

I shall say no more.

Cosmic Connie said...

"Oh no, I've said too much
I haven't said enough"


Anonymous said...

Oh yes,(and you may), I expect skeptico meets up with Deepak Chopra every month in an out of the way diner in a small town to coordinate strategy.
Chopra will perhaps ask for suggestions, and skep will maybe suggest to claim that animals are living longer due to the earth's magnetic field changing, or some such, having already worked out some rough arguments and put downs. The ensuing controversy of course fuels sales, hardens partisan positions, cements loyalties of followers of both sides and obscures THE REAL TRUTH OF THE ILLUMINATI!

Cosmic Connie said...

Well, yes, Anon, that does sound like the way "they" work. It's just like Kevin True-dough has been telling us all along. "They" are deliberately misleading us. And here is something even more shocking, according to KT:

"Be careful about what you read!

"Here’s something else that may shock you and prove just how powerful this information REALLY is…

"The elite also purposely give out wrong or misleading information when they write their biographies or how-to business books. In fact, none of these tycoons even write their own books. They hire ghostwriters who do ALL the work. All the tycoons do is give the ghostwriter misleading information and the writer writes whatever they say – with no real unbiased research or fact-checking to speak of. Most of these elite tycoons never even read their own completed books! And here’s something you do not know – just about every millionaire, billionaire, captain of industry, royal family member, world leader, and celebrity is a member of a secret society. They just never make it public."

Ghostwriters! Who would ever have guessed that celebrities don't write their own books!?!

And remember, Kevin is risking his life to tell us all of this.

Note: The above info was on this page...

Anonymous said...

"Ghost writer motorcycle hero"

~R.E.M. cover Suicide.



Anonymous said...

Gonna slap some more versions of mini epic on ur blog four ur reederz cuz I found they iz gud an' freeky.


Sheila said...

Ever notice that these scams are a weird sort of variation on the Spanish Prisoner? (Most people might be familiar with it as the 419 scam that crops up in their email boxes promising a share of millions of dollars in exchange for helping get said funds out of Nigeria.)

Think about it: the Spanish Prisoner scam ultimately sucks the mark dry by dangling the promise something that doesn't exist. There is no Spanish Prisoner; there are no millions of dollars in need of transfer. But the hope that there might be is dazzling enough that one payment here and another there seems worth it, and then you reach a point where you need it to be true, because you would hate to have sunk all that money into an illusion (even though you have.)

What they are offering in exchange for just one little payment and then another is something that does not exist--a life of unlimited riches and power, free of all pain and disappointment--but that people desperately want to have, and each payment seems so small compared to what one hopes to gain.

Cosmic Connie said...

Gosh darn it, Sheila, you just gave the whole scheme away. How are True-dough and gang ever going to make a living now?

Wait, I forgot... no one reads this blog. So True-dough and gang are safe.

Karl said...

Buying the cds using the payment plan plays into the Trudeau tried and tested scheme of "give me your credit card details and I'll keep billing you until... I'll keep billing you.

This hint of the keys to the universe reminds me of the old Zon power Neo-Tech material which was around in the nineties.


Cosmic Connie said...

Thanks, Karl. The perpetual-billing credit card scheme is indeed time-tested, and is very popular with many Internet marketers. Of course, Kevin Trudeau is far from the only marketer who has been targeted with complaints by consumers who have tried without success to cancel their subscriptions or programs and continue to get billed until they raise holy hell about it. While it's probably true that many Internet marketers, particularly the bigger ones, outsource their fulfillment and most other administrative tasks to other companies, it is still the responsibility of the marketer to see that problems are taken care of.

As for the "secret key to the universe" stuff, that too is a time-honored theme that apparently still works.

Anonymous said...

Kevin Trudeau, the BS artist formerly known as "Kevin Screw-Dough."



Anonymous said...



FYI, this is a deliberate technique of infoterrorism.

Infoterrorism occurs through computer-mediated communication (Internet) and other media with varying degrees of "openness," so it is transacted primarily through writing.

The basic strategies of infoterrorism are thus:



- Introduce paranoia and distrust of mainstream information.


- Illustrate the painful boredom and isolation of living in society.




- Impersonate someone allied with the forces that be (unwise and illegal to allege you are actually employed by the system and on the payroll for your words) and cariacature the beliefs of those who blindly follow the system.


Cosmic Connie said...

Thanks, Anon, but I guess I'm more simpleminded than that. I see it merely as extreme hustledorkery, a crass and transparent attempt to pander to envy and discontent. And I guess it's working for True-dough.

Anonymous said...

You wrote in reply to one of my Anon's posts: "No, he's no dupe, at least not by the definition of the word as I understand it, i.e., "a person who is tricked or swindled." I'd say he's on the giving rather than the receiving end of that process."

I stand corrected.

Cosmic Connie said...

I guess we can agree, Anon, that KT is a duper rather than a dupee. :-)

Anonymous said...

So an individual making money by hook or crook is a bad thing and we should stone him, but corporations making money by hook or crook is ok.
Good grief why worry and spend time on this ...Lord Jesus, the multinational corporations are destroying the planet and guilty of crimes that make Kevin look like a saint.

Cosmic Connie said...

Thanks for weighing in, Anon. April 13. You ask a legitimate question but since I’ve fielded it before, let me just share a few relevant snippets from a Feb. 2010 discussion on Salty Droid's blog.

Cosmic Connie wrote:
DD makes some excellent points all around, one of the main ones being that the [Internet Marketing] gurus — and all of the other species and subspecies of huckster — couldn’t do what they do without a ripe and hungry market. True, they work aggressively and unrelentingly to create, sustain, and grow those markets, but in many cases the screwees have to bear at least some responsibility for the screwing.

That said, I had to smile at DD’s question: “Why focus on just Internet marketers?” I have been asked the very same question more than once regarding my own blog’s focus on New-Wage hustledorks (or “the self-improvement snake oil peddlers,” as DD put it). In my case, I’ve more often been asked, “Why not focus on ‘Big Pharma,’ or the medical profession, or the auto industry, or the food industry, or the banking industry, or the US political system, rather than James Ray and his ilk?” My fellow critics (aka “haters”) and I have also been taken to task for not focusing on the dramatic and sexy world problems that REALLY matter, such as the genocide in Darfur, or the worldwide AIDS epidemic.

And my answer has always been that there are plenty of other blogs, sites, and organizations that focus on those other issues. Not to mention that some of these problems are quite often the focus of high-profile rock-star We-Are-the-World-type projects. Well, *I* happen to be interested in New-Wage/selfish-help/McSpirituality, and have been for many years. It doesn’t mean that I believe the absurdities and real problems in that industry/culture are the most serious ones on the planet, nor does it mean that I am blissfully unconcerned about Darfur or AIDS or Big Pharma or the food industry.

The big question of priorities also reminds me of some of the people I know who are active in various types of animal rescue organizations. They, too, have caught flak from self-righteous types who grouse about their concern with “dumb animals.” They’re sometimes asked, “With all of the homeless people, abused children, human illness, poverty, etc. in the world, why are you focusing on lower species? Take care of your own first.” And most of these people answer in much the same way I have: Animal rescue happens to be their passion.(Not that I am seriously comparing my hobby blog to the real work done by the caring and compassionate folks who rescue abused or abandoned animals, mind you, but the situation is roughly analogous.)

The point is that one person or one organization — or one blog — can’t tackle all of the world’s problems. The only sane and reasonable thing to do is pick your battle(s).

I surmise that Droid has his own reasons for focusing on the IM hucksters, many of whom, frankly, I hadn’t heard of before reading his blog. While I don’t hold to any grand conspiracy theories, and I certainly don’t look at the IM problem as monolithic (even as I don’t look at the self-help industry as monolithic or diabolical), there are definitely some interesting dots being connected on Droid’s blog.

Salty Droid, the blog author, replied:
Don’t sell yourself short CC :: your blog is way more important than animal rescue {although The Droid loves animals and appreciates animal rescue peeps}. And if someone were actually making some dents into the Darfur clusterfuck … then that would be more important than taking down the combination of all of our badguys. Harms can be measured. Malaria nets BEFORE antiretrovirals.

But what good could we do with snark blogs against Big Pharma … or Somalian Rebels … or Chinese Political oppression? Probably none.

I stand for World Peace! BFD … no one cares … not gonna happen.
Perry Belcher shouldn’t be selling info products! Okay … sounds reasonable … maybe that can be arranged.

Telpo Lendolotoproj said...

Yes! And thank you.

Very well said and something that definitely needs saying from time-to-time! In my experience, those trying to take-on 'everything" generally accomplish little.

Your efforts here are greatly appreciated.

Cosmic Connie said...

Thanks, Telpo!

Grantham Taylor Hughes said...

I am a Bauer-Rothschild, one of David Icke's buddies (He said some are good - I'd like to think so). I have never heard of the Brotherhood specifically (but you must remember that people are members of different named groups and sometimes businesses are declared as such), but that does not mean it does not exist (Trudeau probably calling it generically that) insofar as the Council on Foreign Relations (CFR) has many organisations. The main thing I believe to be important remains the variable that Trudeau is selling now. Regarding the factor of speeding-up the manifestation process of visualization on the CD's because I was interested in the variable. If anyone has already purchased them, do you know the variable? Or does it not exist regarding regression therapy's dangling carrot factor. Wherein no one can articulate the impossible and therefore, the answer that plunder as one commenter alluded to previously. Still, I believe in Manifestation at Will (MaW), but the speed varies individually. I made a goal poster years ago putting it away inadvertedly and then taking it out found I had manifested everything on it! So, it does work, but spirit moves at Its pace, not ours and it won't be mocked in my opinion.

Baron von Bauer

Cosmic Connie said...

For some reason I'm reminded, Baron, of a scene in one of my favorite flicks, the 1995 remake of "Sabrina." Newly returned from a whirlwind year in Paris, Sabrina (Julia Ormond) is conversing with David (Greg Kinnear) at one of the lavish Larrabee parties.

Sabrina says to David: "I can't believe I'm here....I went to a party once in a villa in Provence. I didn't know a single person, Rothschild was there, everyone was speaking in French, I could hardly understand a word but I felt more comfortable than I do now..."

After a bit of banter David backtracks and asks, "Which Rothschild?"

Sabrina answers, "Bubba." David laughs, and Sabrina is puzzled. "Why... was that funny?"

I would tell you, Baron, why I find KT’s Brotherhood story at least as funny as David Larrrabee found the prospect of a Bubba Rothschild, but I think I already 'splained it pretty well in my post. One of the funniest bits is that in KT’s infomercial for Your Wish Is Your Command, he says he was a member of The Brotherhood from 1975 till 1999. He was only twelve years old in 1975.

You wrote, "The main thing I believe to be important remains the variable that Trudeau is selling now." Yes, but KT is using his alleged membership in The Brotherhood as his main credential and selling point for not only the CD series but the much more expensive Global Information Network memberships. So the Brotherhood tale is indeed relevant.

Anonymous said...

I got a letter in the mail stating that I was selected out of many to be revealed the secrets in the "secret society". They gave me a certain amount of time to reply my permission to get a free book on the secrets. So I did it since it was free, and than the book came in the mail with another letter, asking me for $140 and the real book is mine. I don't even know how these people got my address. Anyway knowing I'm not going to send them any money I started researching this online, and a lot of people got letters, some sent in the money, got a bogus book.. from the bogus guy your talking about. how ironic. this guy is harassing people strangers who just want to get out of their financial bind and get paid to do it sickens me he should be locked up for good.

Cosmic Connie said...

Thank you, Anon, for sharing your experience. It's a reminder that True-dough is still up to his old tricks, not just on the Internet and TV but via snail mail as well. He may very well be a sociopath with no conscience, but I don't know how his marketing people -- the ones responsible for these ludicrous and deceptive campaigns -- can sleep at night.

Kathryn Price said...

Cosmic Connie, this has to be one of your best posts, but then I've thought that about so many of your posts. I have to say that this part made me laugh out loud:


In fact, in Joe's most recent post on his blog about the Upper Limit Problem that some people have in receiving the generosity of the universe, Joe revealed that his body shook when he was offered a choice between two gifts. I can just imagine.

I also loved your bulleted list of things that Joe forgot to add that Kevin attracted.

And it's just amazing the Kevin escaped The Brotherhood and is generous enough to put himself at personal risk in the face of The Brotherhood's fury in order to bring the secrets to the world. I can see how he must fight to protect the "dumb" that the elite would wipe out in order to ensure a loyal customer base. All I can say is, wow! What a Whirled! Great work.

how to make money said...

It just goes to show all you have to do to make the real bucks?Throw something at the wall and don't stop until something sticks.In my experience it all depends on the list you have of suckers which buy.The greater the list the greater the harvest.It is called the law exponential return.The law of attraction for suckers.Making money the human way thinking about how it affects others is ethical marketing.Kevin Trudeau's is "never give a sucker an even break"

Anonymous said...

Thank you for your informative post. I truly wish I found it before I lost 10 hours of my life listening to free MP3s (14 @ 1 hour each) of Your Wish is Your Command that only gave me a bad headache. I got a headache for a few hours after listening to the first hour, got a headache for another few hours after listening for the second hour, and after listening to the MP3s for eight hours on Saturday two weeks ago I still have the headache.

I think it is all fraud. Who would pay $10,000 for a CD recording session? Each CD ends with "we will take a break, and for those listening at home, this is the end of the CD." Plus why only one hour and a break? Bladder problems? I also had problems with the silence on the tapes, and having attended many meeting before, surprised that he asks for questions after a break (when most people forget what they wanted to ask after distraction). With 8 single hours recorded in the first day, and breaks in between, this would make it a 12 hour session. KT also says on the MP3s that you should listen only for 20 minutes at a time, then take break, that it's too intensive. And he tells too much about "planting some seeds" in our brain so mentions something but does not expand on it. I will keep the MP3s until I find someone that has a recording lab so they can see if there is an extra track that could be causing my headache and possibly turn listeners to botnets; I listened to many books on tape and this never happened to me.

As for the rest, he just promotes pure greed and wanting items more than anything. There is no time frame. Bad things may happen to you but that's good because "the system is working." So for some gullible people, whatever they do from now on, they will think it is not just normal life but "universe working on granting their wish."

Then he recommends staying healthy, eating fruits and veggies but staying off high fructose syrup as it "blocks your brain transmitters and receptors and you cannot send or receive signals" ??! Taking walks in the sun, relaxing. Meditation is bad as "no one ever got rich meditating." Well, some of us work two jobs and have no time to take strolls. And yes, he is the only one with true knowledge of everything, because he says that there are no facts - every fact is only someone else's opinion. He is the center of universe and hints that he knows about universe but does not want to give us too much info now. So in biblical terms, is he the Satan, lord of the dark himself?

And then he gives a very long example of true belief - but it is from Star Wars...

Anyway, I think it is all a scam and that GIN members will soon need to drink a lot of gin as they will start running out of humans to join. $1,000 to start, $150 a month, and $1,500 to move up 11 times to the 12th level costs only $19,300 if you want to do it in a year and requires roughly 100 recruits at a fee of $200, and four levels down every earthling is a member and we are sending space ships to recruit in the universe...

Anyway, I cannot believe people are so gullible as to join. For me, I am done with the MP3s, do not want to wish the remaining 4 hours, have heard too much, and regret wasting 10 hours of my life. I truly wish my headache goes away soon.

Thank you, Connie, once again for exposing the Nutty!

Cosmic Connie said...

Hey, I'm sorry I haven't returned to this discussion, which is relevant all over again in light of my recent posts about True-dough.

I noticed that Karl, way back on Saturday, December 19, 2009 11:10:00 PM mentioned Neo-Tech, which is one of the topics of my latest two-part blog post. And -- judging from the details, such as the $140 book offer -- it looks as if Anon Thursday, February 10, 2011 11:08:00 PM may have received mail from Neo-Tech as a result of buying something from True-dough.

Regarding more recent comments, I want to thank Kathryn, howtomakemoney, and Anon Saturday, August 20, 2011 11:25:00 PM for your additions to the discussion.

Anon, thank you very much for summarizing the math of the GIN "make-money" plan, which will be one of the topics discussed in Part 2 of my Nouveau-Tech/GIN offering.

It really is hard to believe people are still falling for this stuff.

Cosmic Connie said...

BTW, Anon Aug. 20, other folks have mentioned the apparent technical irregularities and inconsistencies in the Your Wish Is Your Command CD set (which of course is just an upsell for GIN). I guess the KT propaganda machine finally found a good story to explain it all (though the claim is that KT has been saying this "from day one"). I found this on GIN Affiliate Shannon Smith's Web site:

...[Q.] 'Hi Kevin. I had a question I was hoping you could answer for me. It seems no one wants to address this, but I keep getting it from some prospects -- is the CD series "Your Wish Is Your Command" a scam? Why can’t you hear the people asking questions and throughout the program there are background sounds, like a police siren, dogs barking, horns honking, and at some point, an office phone rings. I’ve heard all that myself, but never had anyone I know mention it. Have you had any issues with this? We’d greatly appreciate any info you can provide. Looking forward to Chicago!'

[A:] Here’s the answer to this… There is no magic here and there is no secret. I recorded the ‘Your Wish Is Your Command’ CD series in the Alps at a private chalet. I’ve said that from day one. In the private chalet, it was recorded in the summer. The windows were open. We don’t need air conditioning. Outside of the room, the windows are open. You can hear the dogs bark. You can hear the European siren that goes by at one point and you can hear one of the phones in the chalet go off, so it’s not a surprise that you hear those sounds. Somebody says, “how come we can’t hear the people asking the questions?” When I recorded this live, I had people in the room and I set up the recording device with a block because I wanted to record the audio, not just for the people in the room, but to make a CD series.

Now, if I am in a room talking and a person in the back 50 feet away asks a question, it won’t be picked up by the microphone. That’s why you have to hand the person in the audience a microphone. Otherwise, it’s not recorded. So, that is why I would repeat the question. When the person was talking, I would not talk. That way after we recorded the entire live event, I would go into the studio and listen to it. We then edited it out and shortened the amount of time that I was waiting while a person was asking a question. Therefore, you don’t hear any noise at all during that period. We shortened it and edited all the noise out. That’s number one. Number two, I then re-recorded some parts in the studio to make sure the flow of ‘Your Wish Is Your Command’ was perfect for the in-home listener.

So, the fact that you are hearing noises outside, like the siren and the dogs, is because we were in a room in a chalet in the Alps in Europe and that’s what the noises were outside. The reason you don’t hear the questions are threefold; number one, the person wasn’t handed a mic, number two, in the editing booth, I edited out any noise and shortened the amount of time that there was blank space, and number three, I also rerecorded some sections in the studio so that the material was all there.

So, if somebody says, "Is it a scam?" It really doesn’t matter where it was recorded. The fact is, when you go through it, is the material presented good? Personally, I think the material is excellent. The fact that I recorded it live as opposed to 100% in studio I think makes it even better. However, for those who’ve gone through it, you be the judge whether you like this or not. Right now it’s being called “The Think And Grow Rich” of our time.

I hope that answers your question. It was definitely a good question.

Yours in wealth…


Here's the link:

Anonymous said...

Thank you, Connie, for your recent posts. I think KTfound a good explanation, but it does not necessarily fit the profile. I think he will come up with a new scheme soon as the income from this scam will start drying out. And I still have the headache :(

The scary thing about those recordings, he mentions in the beginning that you should listen as often as you can, and the friend that gave me the MP3s listens 7 hours a day every single day over and over again, whole presentation in two days, and listened to it about 50 times over and over. Now that's scary. That is what I call "follow your master" and who knows where he will lead them. I am out of this game.

Thank you again, Connie, for all info!

Cosmic Connie said...

I'm truly sorry about your headache, Anon. If it makes you feel any better, I get one too every time I read about True-dough. My headache comes from rolling my eyes.

The instructions to listen over and over and over to "Your Wish Is Your Command" -- and people's willingness to do it -- are indeed pretty disturbing. The whole thing sort of reminds me of Rhonda Byrne's claim a few years ago that watching "The Secret" DVD just seven times in a row would permanently alter your brain.

Anyway, I'm glad for you that you are out of the GIN game.

Unknown said...

Thank you Connie. I hope my headache is going away. But I lost a friend :(

This was my very first encounter with KT and I hope the last one. It is so sad there are so many con artists on this planet, and they are called "artists" for a reason.

Have a wonderful Sunday!

Jeff Hobbs said...

Kevin Trudeau is rich. ALL that needs to be said.

Cosmic Connie said...

Everyone: Since Blogger will not allow me to go back and edit comments that are already published, and since I do not want to interrupt the flow of comments, I will post an update here. The GIN affiliate I mentioned above, Shannon Smith, has informed me that he is no longer involved with promoting the Global Information Network or Kevin Trudeau. In light of the events that have been unfolding over the past year and a half, I would say this is not at all surprising. I wish Shannon the best.