Transcript This is a transcribed copy for the episode "Dreamscaperers." Feel free to edit or add to this page as long as the information comes directly from the episode.
Previous: "Land Before Swine" Next: "Gideon Rises"
The episode opens with a rainy day at the Mystery Shack, while Dipper and Mabel are playing Conflict Boat.
Dipper Pines I'm gonna say... B5.
Mabel Pines Miss! (Puts a peg on her board) Whop!
Camera shows Mabel's board, with her pegs arranged like a kitten.
Dipper I don't think you're playing this right.
Stan Pines (Offscreen:) Kids! Come quick!
Dipper and Mabel enter the living room to find Stan watching television.
Stan (Laughs) I need you to laugh at this with me!
A commercial for the Tent of Telepathy comes on the television.
Gideon Gleeful (On television, singing:) Who's cute as a button, and always your friend? Lil' G-I-D to the E-O-N! Wink!
Bud Gleeful on TV Li'l Gideon!
Dipper Ugh, Gideon!
Mabel Remember when I wouldn't date him and he tried to destroy us?
Stan He's always trying to trick me into losing the Mystery Shack.
Wendy Corduroy One time I caught him stealing my moisturizer.
Soos Ramirez And yet, our mutual hatred for him bonds us together.
Gideon (Laughs)
Bud (On television, voice-over:) Come on down to Li'l Gideon's Tent of Telepathy, opening soon at this location.
Commercial shows the Tent of Telepathy crushing the Mystery Shack.
Dipper Uh, should we be worried about that?
Stan Please, the only way Gideon's taking over this shack is by breaking in and stealing my deed.
A crash is heard from upstairs.
Wendy You mean like, right now?
Cuts to Stan's office, where Gideon is attempting to open Stan's safe.
Gideon 38? 41? Oh, heavens to Betsy!
Stan Gideon!
Gideon Well, well, Stanford, my arch-nemesis. We seem to have entered a dangerous game of cat and mouse. But the question remains, who is the cat, and who is the-
Stan Soos, broom.
Gideon Oh no, not the broom!
Stan (Chases Gideon around the room with the broom)
Gideon (Hisses)
Stan (Hits Gideon with the broom twice before chasing him outside)
Gideon You mark my words, Stanford, one day I'm gonna get that combination. And once I steal that deed, you'll never see the Mystery Shack again!
Stan Good luck, bucko!
Close up of Gideon looking angry.
Cuts to Stan putting the Mystery Shack deed in his safe and pressing the lock button.
Stan (Laughs) The combo to this safe is in the one place he'll never find it: my brain. (Walks away)
Gideon Your brain isn't as safe as you might think, Stanford Pines! (Pulls out Journal 2) This is the last straw! It's time to unlock the journal's greatest secret...
Camera zooms in on picture of the Zodiac seen in the opening sequence.
Cut to theme song.
Dipper, Mabel, Stan, and Wendy are watching television. Dipper and Wendy are shooting each other with Nyarf brand dart guns.
Television He put the old in "old west," they call him (musically:) Grandpa the Kid!
Grandpa the Kid (On television) I'm tired during the day.
Stan I can relate to this.
Mabel Grunkle Stan, why can't we watch a movie that we'll all enjoy? Dream Boy High! "Where love is on your permanent record."
Stan, Dipper and Wendy Boo!
Mabel You'll learn to like it.
A crash is heard from the kitchen.
Soos (Runs into the room) Aaah! Dudes, there's a bat in the kitchen! It tried to touch me with its "weird little bat fingers!"
Stan Don't worry, I got this under control (Leans back in armchair) Dipper, take care of it.
Mabel (Laughs) Yes!
Dipper What? Why can't Mabel do it?
Stan 'Cause life ain't fair. Now go fight a bat so we can watch TV.
Dipper No way, Grunkle Stan! You always make me do dumb chores. I'm putting my foot down this time! (Stamps foot on carpet)
Stan I said do it kid. Now!
Old west music plays.
Stan and Dipper have a stare off, growling at each other. Stan wins.
Dipper Okay, I'll do it! (Sighs; walks into kitchen, Mabel following behind him)
Dipper (Picks up a saucepan and spoon on the floor, mumbling) Stupid chores...
Mabel Remember, bats are more afraid of you than you are of them.
Dipper (Enters the kitchen, offscreen)
Mabel Maybe I'm thinking of ducklings.
Loud screams and crashes come from the kitchen, while kitchen supplies and Dipper's hat are thrown outside.
Mabel Ducklings. (Laughs) Quack quack! Quack quack quack!
Cuts to Soos applying disinfectant to Dipper's wounds while Mabel applies bandages to Dipper's head.
Dipper Ow, ow!
Soos (Singing:) Swabbing on disinfectant, doo doo doo...
Dipper (Sighs) Why does Grunkle Stan always pick on me? Think about it! The more painful or difficult the chore is, the more likely it is I'll have to do it. Why doesn't he pick on you guys?
Soos Dipper, Stan's personality is one of life's great mysteries. Like whether or not it's possible to lick your own elbow.
Mabel I bet you can't!
Soos I bet I can! (Tries to lick elbow and walks away)
Mabel (Following Soos; chanting:) Lick it! Lick it! Lick it!
Dipper Sometimes I feel like Stan hates me. (Looks up to a picture of Stan on the wall)
Stan (Offscreen, yelling:) The sink's clogged. Dipper, get in here and fix it!
Dipper (Growls, grabs his Nyarf dart gun and fires it at the picture)
The scene fades into the same picture of Stan, except with a red "X" painted over his eyes and surrounded by candles.
Gideon You think that combination's safe in your mind, Stanford? We'll see what my new minion has to say about that! (Chanting:) Triangulum, entangulum. Vene foris dominus mentium. Vene foris videntis omnium! (Broken Latin for "Triangle, entangled. Lord of Minds, come to the door. All-seeing one, come to the door!")
Cuts to Mabel and Soos outside, Soos is still attempting to lick his own elbow, with Mabel still chearing him on.
Mabel (Chanting:) Lick that elbow! Lick that elbow!
Soos Like the infinite horizon, it eludes my grasp.
Gideon (Offscreen, laughs)
Mabel Is that who I think it is?
Mabel and Soos walk toward Gideon.
Gideon (Grunting, clasps his stomach and his eyes glow blue; chants:) Egassem sdrawkcab. egassem sdrawkcab. Egassem sdrawkcab! Egassem sdrawkcab! Egassem sdrawkcab!
The background turns black and white, wildlife pauses in midair and Bill Cipher appears.
Bill Cipher (Laughs) Oh, oh, Gravity Falls! It is good to be back. Name's Bill Cipher, and I take it you're some kind of living ventriloquist dummy? (Laughs) I'm just kidding, I know who you are, Gideon!
Gideon W-what are you? H-how do you know my name?
Bill Oh, I know lots of things! (Body shows pictures of various cryptic locations. In a slow, deep voice:) LOTS OF THINGS... (Body returns to normal) Hey, look what I can do! (Gestures toward a deer, the deer's teeth then fly into his hand. Gives the teeth to Gideon) Deer teeth! For you, kid! (Laughs)
Gideon (Cries out in shock and drops teeth on the ground) You're insane!
Bill Sure I am, what's your point? (Puts teeth back in deer's mouth and the deer runs away)
Gideon Listen to me, demon! I have a job for you. I need you to enter the mind of Stanford Pines and steal the code to his safe.
Mabel and Soos (Gasp)
Bill (Laughs) Wait... Stan Pines? (Body shows pictures of Stan and his tattoo) You know what, kid? You've convinced me! I'm sold! I'll help you with this and in return you can help me with something I've been working on! We'll work out the details later.
Gideon Deal!
Bill (His hand lights on blue fire and he shakes hands with Gideon) Well, time to invade Stan's mind! This should be fun! Remember: reality is an illusion, the universe is a hologram, buy gold, bye! (Disappears)
Gideon It worked! (Laughs maniacally)
Cut to Dipper sweeping the carpet in the living room while Stan sleeps in his chair.
Stan (Mumbling in his sleep) Oh, I'm so sorry.
Dipper What is going on in that guy's head? (Begins to walk away)
Mabel and Soos run in.
Mabel Dipper! We've gotta help Stan!
Dipper Wait, what?
Soos (While eating Nyums brand Burrito Bites) This evil triangle guy said he's gonna break into Stan's mind and steal the combination to his safe! Also we stopped for snacks on the way here.
Dipper Triangle guy? (Takes out Journal 3) I feel like I've seen something like this before in the journal... (Reading:) "Beware Bill, the most powerful and dangerous creature I've ever encountered. Whatever you do, never let him enter your mind."
Stan (Grunts in sleep)
Dipper, Mabel and Soos (Gasp)
Mabel Grunkle Stan!
Cut to shadow of Bill entering Stan's mind.
Stan (Eyes start glowing blue and grunts while making random movements)
Mabel (Takes the journal from Dipper; reads:) It is possible to follow the demon into a person's mind and prevent his chaos. One must simply recite this incantation.
Dipper Ugh, this is just great. I spend all day cleaning sinks and fighting bats for Stan and now I have to save him from some crazy brain demon?
Mabel But if we don't do anything Gideon might steal the shack! Or worse!
Stan (Eyes still glowing blue, he screams)
Dipper (Sighs) Fine. Get ready, guys. We're about to journey into the most horrifying, disturbing place any of us have ever been: our uncle's mind.
Lightning flashes and dramatic music plays.
Soos You think I can take these Burrito Bites into Stan's brain? Thumbs up? Thumbs down? (Pauses; laughs) You know what, I'm just gonna bring 'em.
Cut to commercial break
Cut to Dipper, Mabel and Soos around a sleeping Stan in the living room with the lights off and surrounded by a circle of candles
Dipper (Holding Journal 3) Okay, guys, in order to save our uncle, we're gonna have to follow that... dream demon into his mind.
Soos I wonder what Stan's thinking about right now.
Soos (Using Stan as a ventriloquist dummy, in a high voice:) I love Soos like a son!
Dipper Soos! This is serious!
Soos (Still using Stan's mouth in a high voice) Sorry!
Mabel and Soos (Laugh) Yeah! (High five each other)
Dipper Let's do this. (Puts hand on Stan's head) 

Mabel and Soos also put their hands on Stan's head.

Dipper (Reading from journal:) Videntus omnium. Magister mentium. Magnesium ad hominem. Magnum opus. Habeas corpus! Inceptus Nolanus overratus! Magister mentium! Magister mentium! MAGISTER MENTIUM!
As Dipper speaks, his eyes go blue, then Soos', then Mabel's and the candles go out, and after the incantation, there is a blue explosion and the gang is inside Stan's mind. Mabel and Soos make exclamations of awe.
Soos What the?
Mabel Whoa, this is Stan's mind?
Soos I figured there would be more hot old ladies.
Mabel Remember everyone, we've got to look out for the triangle guy.
Bill (Arriving) Yeah, look out for the triangle guy!
Soos It's him! It's the guy!
Mabel You leave our uncle's brain alone, you isosceles monster! (Runs inside Bill, seconds later comes back outside) Gotcha! Wait, what?
Bill Ah, Stan's family, we meet at last! Question Mark, Shooting Star, Pine Tree, I had a hunch I might bump into you! (Shoots a hole in Dipper's chest)
Dipper (Screams, deep breathing)
Mabel (Sticks her hand through Dipper) Boop!
Dipper Mabel! What do you want with our uncle's mind anyway?
Bill Oh, just the code to the old man's safe! Inside the shack is a maze of a thousand doors representing your uncle's memories. Behind one of them is a memory of him inputting the code! I just need to find it and Gideon will pay me handsomely.
Mabel Not if we stop you!
Bill Hah, fat chance! I'm the master of the mind. (Blue flame encircles him) I even know what you're thinking right now! 
Mabel That's impossible, no one can guess what I'm thinking!
Bill makes Xyler and Craz appear.
Xyler Whoa, where are we, bro?
Craz We must be in heaven, 'cause I just saw an angel! (points to Mabel)
Mabel (Hugging Craz's leg) I'm never letting go of your leg!
Bill You're out of your league, kids. Turn around now before you see something you might regret. Later, suckers! (Crashes through wall of mindscape Mystery Shack)
Dipper We're goin' in! Mabel, can we leave those guys out here? Looking at them -- hurts my eyes...
Mabel No! They can help us!
Xyler and Craz Totally! Arm throne! (Carry Mabel in arms)
Mabel (Chuckles)
Soos Dude! Arm throne! (Starts walking after Dipper) Arm throoone!
Dipper (Screams)
Everyone heads into the shack and awes.
Craz Radical!
Xyler I also think it's radical!
Stan Bat (Flying by Dipper walking down steps) No refunds! No refunds! No refunds! (Repeats)
Some of Stan's fears are shown, and it cuts to the gang entering Stan's memories, all speaking.
Soos Whoa, look! All of Stan's memories!
Dipper Great. Sure there's plenty of memories of Stan bossing me around, can't wait to see more of that.
Mabel Come on Dipper, we've gotta find the code before Bill does!
Craz Mabel is talking!
Xyler So rad!
Soos Let's get searching!
Gang runs down hallway, panting. Dipper opens a door
Cut to scene in Colombian prison
Stan Jorge, Rico, you're the two best Colombian prison friends a fellah could make.
Jorge Espero que muera. (Subtitles read "I hope he dies.")
Rico Sí. (Subtitle reads "Sí.")
Dipper Nope!
Dipper closes the door. Cut to Soos opening another door
Cut to scene outside a home
Stan Sir, would you like to buy a Stan-Vac vacuum? Stan-Vac: It sucks more than anything.
Door closes


Gotta work on that.
Soos Nope.
Cut to Soos closing the door
Cut to Mabel opening a small door
Mabel Whoa, it's Stan on a date!
Cuts to Stan on a date with Lazy Susan.
Stan So, your, uh... your eye is weird, let's... let's talk about that.
Lazy Susan (Laughs)
Stan (Laughs; thinking:) This is going terrible. I can't think of anything to say and she.. looks weird up close. Think of a way out! (Aloud:) NON-SPECIFIC EXCUSE! (Knocks over food and runs away)
Mabel Yeesh. (Closes the door)
Dipper discovers a door written "Dipper Memories."
Dipper Look, guys! Memories about me! (Opens the door)
Soos That doesn't seen like a good idea.
Dipper I just wanna know what the old guy really thinks of me.
Mabel We already know how Stan feels about us! He loves us! We're great. (Walks away)
Soos Yeah. Let's just keep moving.
Xyler More moving?
Craz Yes! I love motion!
Dipper walks a bit, but turns around and runs to the Dipper memories door and enters it. 
Dipper Okay. Just a quick peek.
Dipper walks by the doors. The sound Stan calling Dipper echoes. Dipper walks in front of one of them and opens the door. Inside is a memory of Stan making Dipper chop firewood.
Stan No buts! Now go and chop that firewood already! (Hits Dipper's head with a newspaper)
Dipper walks away to chop the firewood. Stan sits on the couch.
Soos Dude, Stan, I've been meaning ask you. Why are you so hard on Dipper all the time?
Stan Look, Soos, I'm gonna let you in on something. Wanna know what I really think? (Whispers to Soos)
Dipper leans to listen what Stan is talking.
Stan (In a whisper:) The kid's a loser. He's weak! He's an utter embarrassment! I just wanna get rid of him.
Dipper closes the door, depressed. Cuts to Bill, disguised as Soos, and Mabel.
Soos Hello? Code to Stan's safe? Where are you?
Xyler Opening and closing doors is fun!
Craz I can do it also!
Soos opens a door. Inside the door Stan pushes buttons of the vending machine. The vending machine opens and a secret hallway appears.
Stan If only people knew the truth, that hidden behind this vending machine, I secretly have a -
Soos BORING! (Closes the door)
Cuts to Mabel in front of a door written "Top Secret" on top of it. 
Mabel Alright guys, I have a good feeling about this door.
Mabel opens the door. Inside it has a memory of Stan in the bathroom.
Stan Hey, Mr. Tummy! (Changes his voice) Hey, Mr. Stan! (Back to normal voice) Are you hungry? (Changes his voice again) Yes!
Soos AAH..
Stan Eat your crackers! (Changes his voice) Yum yum yum yum!
Mabel Sweet Sally! (Closes the door)
Soos Hah, we've been searching forever! What if the triangle guy finds the memory before we do?
Mabel If we wanna find Stan's memory, we gotta think like Stan. He's always hiding stuff, right?
Soos Yeah! Like how he hides his arrest warrants under that rug in the gift shop?
Mabel Soos, that's it! Look! (Walks to a rug and finds a door under it)
All (Gasp)
Mabel (Opens the door)
Stan (Kisses the deed and puts it into the safe) There ya go. (Closes the safe door) And now to input the code. 13, 44, and finally..
Soos (Closes the door) Dude! we found it!
Mabel Yeah!
Xyler and Craz But what do we do now? Jinx!
Mabel Um... um... Let's just destroy the door before Bill can find it! (Finds a battle-ax)
Soos Wait! Maybe I should do it! My big fat arms are great at destroying stuff!
Mabel Oh, okay.
Soos begins to lifts up the door with some kind of psychic power. As he does this, another Soos walks in.
Soos Hey guys! I just saw a memory of Stan roller skating and wearing short-shorts! (Pause) Didn't look... didn't look that bad! Hey, something weird is goin' on here.
Bill (Still in Soos' form, laughs; turns back to normal) Boy, you kids sure are gullible! I knew you'd lead me straight to the code! (Laughs) It's funny how dumb you are.
Commercial break.
Bill The combination to Stan's safe. Boy, that was even easier then I thought!
Mabel Oh, yeah? Well, you're a-a stink face!
Xyler Awesome comeback, Mabel!
Mabel Don't treat me like a child, Xyler.
Bill Later, suckers! (Flies away)
Mabel Come on! We've gotta save Stan!
Dipper (Walking up from the stairs) What's the point? Why should I save him, huh? I work for Stan day and night and all he does in return is say he wants to get rid of me.
Mabel Dipper, I'm sure that's not true.
Dipper I saw it with my own eyes in one of his memories, Mabel! He always picked on me and now I know why. Stan hates me!
All except Dipper (Gasp)
Mabel Dipper, it doesn't matter what you saw. If we don't stop Bill, we'll lose the Shack!
Dipper No! You know what? Not this time. For once this is one of Stan's problems I'm not gonna fix.
Mabel Fine. Come on, Soos. We'll save Stan ourselves.
Soos Dipper, you're a cool dude, but... this isn't cool, dude.
Craz Let's go, Xyler.
Xyler All right, Craz!
Craz Those are our names!
Mabel, Craz, Xyler and Soos leave. Cuts to Bill. Bill opens every door he passes. Then a phone ringing sound is heard. Bill touches his bow tie revealing he had a call from Gideon.
Bill Y'ello?
Gideon Bill! Did you find the memory with the combination yet?
Bill Relax, short stack. I got it right here. 
Gideon Ha ha ha! Perfect. now give it to me and we'll finish our bargain.
Bill Finally! It's--you got a pen there? It's 13, 44... (The door gets hit by a nyarf gun) Ah! No no no! Wait, no!
The door falls to the bottomless pit from one of Stan's memories.
Stan ...and none more bottomless than the bottomless pit! Which you can see here is bottomless. (Watches the door fall) Whooh! Whatever that was, it's gone forever!
The door closes. Behind Bill is Mabel who shot the door with a nyarf gun.
Mabel Ha ha! Boom!
Xyler and Craz Mabel did it!
Soos The Shack is safe!
Gideon The deal's off!
Bill Wa-wait! No! Wait!
Gideon I'm switchin' to plan B!
The screen turns off and Bill's body cracks to pieces and falls off. Then Bill's body reappears as red.
Bill YOU! You can't even imagine what you just cost me! Do you have any idea what I'm like... (In a low, demonic voice:) WHEN I'M MAD???!!
Several characters pass by Bill's eye. Then a rock in the shape of Stan's head pops out from their feet and raises up. Bill's size starts increasing.
Mabel (Gasp)
Soos So I guess he gets really mad when he gets mad.
Bill (In a low, demonic voice:) EAT NIGHTMARES!
All (Scream)
Cut to Dipper walking around, finding a way out.
Dipper Ugh! How do I get out of this place? (Opens doors) Exit? Hello? (Opens the door with a memory of him chopping wood) Aw, this again?
Stan He's a loser. He's weak. I just wanna get rid of him.
Dipper (Starts to close the door)
Stan Heh, yeah. Those are all things people said about me when I was a boy.
Dipper (Opens the door) Huh?
Stan It was terrible. I was the biggest wimp on the playground!
A door of Stan's memory opens behind Dipper. It shows Stan as a kid getting bullied by other kids and running with tears.
Stan So one summer, my pop signs up me for boxing lessons.
A door of Stan boxing opens. He is getting punched by his opponent.
Stan It was even worse than the school yard!
Young Stan Left hook! (Punches his opponent)
Stan Y'know, that time I thought my pop was trying to torture me.
A door of Stan at the theater opens.
Stan But wouldn't you know it? The old man was doin' me a favor all along!
Man (Tries to steal Carla's bag.) Give me that bag!
Carla Help! My purse! Help!
Young Stan Left hook! (Punches the man)
The people all around Stan cheers for him. Carla gives him a kiss.
Stan You see it? That why I'm hard on Dipper. To toughen him up. So when the world fights, he fights back.
Soos Do you think it's actually working?
Stan (Points at Dipper)
Dipper (in the memory) (Chops the wood in a half) I-I did it! Ha ha! Yes!
Stan He's really comin' along! When push comes to shove, I'm actually proud of him. Just... don't ever tell him that. His head is big enough as it is.
Soos (Laughs) That's true.
Dipper grins and puts his hand on the memory. Then he accidentally gets into the memory, facing with Stan.
Stan Whoa, kid, what are you doin' here? Nice hole in your chest, by the way. Let's fix that up. (Points his finger and the hole in Dipper's chest regenerates)
Dipper Wh-what the- How did you do that?
Stan Word to the wise, kid. We're in the mind! You can do what ever you imagine in here! (Creates a Pitt Cola and drinks it)
Dipper Well how about that?
A fighting sound and Soos', Mabel's scream is heard outside from the memory.
Dipper Oh my gosh, what am I doing? I gotta stop Bill! (Runs out of the memory)
Stan Huh, fighting back.
Cut to Bill
Bill One nightmare, coming up!
Soos Nightmare? Hope he doesn't mean that British dog man I'm always dreaming about...
The British dog man appears in front of Soos.
British dog man 'Ello, 'ello, 'ello! Who's crike for a stick in the pudding? (Pokes Soos with his cane)
Soos (Screams) It's everything I've ever feared!
Bill You! (Strikes a nightmare to Mabel)
Mabel becomes green and ugly. Her voice also changes low and slow.
Mabel (Screams) My cuteness! (Voice distorted) What did you do to my - (In a low voice:) cuteness? (Blowing raspberry)
Bill You're next! (Points at Xyler and Craz)
Craz Cool! We're next!
Craz dances with Xyler but they both get knocked out by Bill's beam. They burn and vanish.
Mabel (In a low voice:) My dream boys!
Bill And now to finish you all once in for all!
Mabel and Soos No, no!
Dipper (Flies in) Hey! Bill!
Bill WHAT?!
Dipper Nice bow tie! (Makes a hole in Bill with laser from his eyes)
Bill (Screams)
Mabel (In a low voice:) Dipper!
Soos Dude!
Dipper Guys! I just learned that you can conjure whatever you can conceive in Grunkle Stan's mindscape! 
Mabel (In a low voice:) Huh?
Dipper Just think of cool fighting stuff and it will happen. Like this! (Gets rid of the British dog man with laser)
Soos Ha ha, he's dead now.
Bill What? Who told you that! Don't listen to him!
Mabel We can do anything? (Comes back to normal, along with her voice) Like have kittens for fists? (Her fists becomes kittens; as she shoots them at Bill:) Po-pow! P-p-pow! Pow!
The kitten fists stick on Bill.
Bill (Screams)
Mabel (The kittens on her hands start licking her; laughs) Well hello, friends!
Soos Anything, huh? Soos love stomach beam stare! (Shoots colorful question marks from stomach and knocks Bill off)
Bill (Covers his hole) Enough games! (Shoots laser from his eye)
Mabel Hamster ball shields activate! (Creates a hamster ball around herself)
Soos and Dipper Activate! (Creates a hamster ball around themselves)
The laser gets reflected by the hamster ball and hits Bill in the eye.
Bill AH! Oh my eye! AAH!
Mabel, Dipper and Soos' hamster ball breaks.
Mabel Rise, Xyler! Rise, Craz!
Xyler and Craz rise from behind her back with musical instruments. They start to play synthesized music.
Bill No! Synthesized music! It hurts!
Dipper And now to imagine your worst nightmare! A portal out of Stan's mind!
Mabel (Singing:) Out of Stan's mi-ind!
Dipper Mabel! Everyone, together!
The gang all starts to imagine. A hole below Bill appears.
Bill No, no, no! ENOUGH!! (Makes everything white. He becomes yellow again) You know, I've been impressed with you guys. You are more clever than you look. Especially the fat one.
Soos (Pokes Mabel; in a whisper:) He's talking about you!
Bill So I'm gonna let you kids off the hook. You might come in handy later. BUT KNOW THIS: A darkness approaches. A day will come in the future when everything you care about will change! Until then I'll be watching you! I'LL BE WATCHING YOU... (Bill disappears, his words echoing)
Dipper He's gone! we did it! (Gang cheers and then they begin to disappear) Stan must be waking up. 
Mabel (To Xyler and Craz:) Will I ever see you guys again?
Craz In your dreams.
Xyler Good one, bro. Good one.
The gang wakes up in the living room, shouting in surprise.
Mabel We did it!
Stan What? Did what? What are you all doing here? And why was I dreaming of two brightly colored and radical young men?
Dipper Grunkle Stan! You're okay! (Hugs Stan)
Stan What is this, a hug?
Dipper Nope! It's a choke hold. (Chokes Stan)
Mabel and Soos laughs. Dipper stops choking Stan.
Stan (Chuckles) Not bad, kid. Not bad.
Mabel I'm just glad Gideon didn't get into the safe. I really love this old shack.
Soos Group hug! (Pause) No? I never know the right time!
The Shack starts to shake.
Dipper Hey, do you guys feel...?
An explosion happens behind the sofa. 
Gideon Oh, I'm sorry, Pines family. Did I wake you?
Dipper But.. we defeated Bill!
Gideon Bill failed me! So I switched to plan B: dynamite!
Stan What? Bill? Who? What are you guys talking about?
Gideon Spoiler alert, Stanford! I've got the deed! (Shows the family the deed) The Mystery Shack belongs to me! So get out of my property! (By a handheld transceiver:) Daddy? Bring it around the front.
Dipper Don't worry, guys! It's just part of the dream! We're gonna wake up any second now! Right? Right?
Bud Gleeful drives a crane with a wrecking ball to the shack and smashes the Mystery Shack's sign.
All (Screams)
Soos Someone pinch me, dude...
The broken sign falls in front of the gang.
Cut to end credit, slowed down in a Twins Peaks style. It says: To Be Continued...

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