The Before & The After

Some of the most life-changing things occur so suddenly – out of the blue there is a drastic turn of events and things are instantly not what they were before. The separation is created: what was before, and what came after. These life altering events are not planned. Rather, they come on an otherwise subdued Tuesday evening.

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Mom’s Door

A door, kissed long and hard by the sun,

Splintered wood, peeling red paint,

Brass knob, hot fingerprints, weeded cement bellowing out below.

Pounded by storms and slammed by ghosts,

A lifetime of entrances, exits, and foot steps,

Oblivious to the world changing constantly just beyond its horizon.

This is still my home, my messy soul.

Chances are you will never meet,

The dusty crevices housing a million memories,

Lucky to stand for so long, sturdy and sure.

Bold speck of reassurance,

Splatter of color in a grey world,

Rooted deep, part of one girl’s beginning.

Replaced today with chalky beige; the new owners favor boredom?

A photograph, to remind of a gloriously palpable youth,

Not quite the same, but she will do well in her new glass case.

Hanging above me to whisper,

You are always with me, and I am with you, kid.

Bittersweet comfort. I go on, as she would insist.



Forever grief.