A deadly silence that has lasted far too long

A deadly silence that has lasted far too long

I must admit I have mixed feelings about what has motivated your current series on suicide. Why now? This big issue of life and death should never have been hidden or removed from daily discourse to begin with.

Many years ago, my brother Geoff killed himself. I was a child when this happened and I have had my whole life to think about it, to try to understand and to live with the heartache. I am not exaggerating when I say my brother had an outstanding academic record at school and university; he was also kind and had a great sense of humour. But something was wrong. The sudden death of our Dad must have had some effect on him, as our whole family had been in turmoil. He did seek help shortly before his death - he went to our family GP who gave him a prescription to ease his mind; the prescription was never filled.

He went to his trusted uncle who apparently told him "not to come round here talking like that". And in his upset state, I am sure he tried to work things out for himself.


It is too easy to point to single events in an attempt to find some sort of answer to comfort ourselves after the suicide of a friend or loved one. Sometimes terrible things happen that can't really be explained. When I was a child, I mourned quietly for my brother and hated the fact that there were horrible people who continued to live happily on.

I am sorry that I have had to deal with blankness when it comes to understanding the dreadful act of suicide, and the fear that has prevented us embracing the great complexities of life and death.

Thank you for opening up the discussion.
Rosemary Kemp,
Mont Albert

Why we must keep talking about suicide

Congratulations to The Age for having the courage to debate and publicise suicide - and thank you to all the families who shared their grief to help others.

I am one of the lucky ones - my 24-year-old son survived his severe suicidal depression and is recovered. But some of his friends haven't, male and female. There is an epidemic out there. I have been so frustrated at the lack of acknowledgement of the problem.

My children have been to several funerals for close friends who suicided, and we know of many others. The effects are far-reaching. My daughter is still dealing with the effects of the suicide death of her good friend. She has finally agreed to face the issues and have counselling herself. She rang me to tell me about the articles in The Age. She found it hard to confront them - but was very excited to see what you were doing.

It is time we stopped being ashamed and embarrassed by a suicide; we need to talk about it and confront it, otherwise how will we ever solve the problem?

Please, keep the debate going; don't let it go until something positive comes out of it - until we understand and can help.
Judith Brown,

Professional hazard

During the '90s, as a principal of a country primary school, I, too, like Jeff Barger (The Age, 18/8), found myself leaving for work in, and returning home after dark, eating at the local hotel so I could work in the evenings rather than drive the 40 kilometres home, and working on weekends, sometimes on Saturdays and Sundays. Paradoxically, the more I delved into the intricacies of Education Department administration, the less progress I appeared to make. In the end, I resigned.

Away from the situation, I have since realised with horror how close I was to becoming another tragic statistic; how I couldn't see this when in the thick of it all; and how, to have asked for help (even if I recognised any difficulty), would have been seen by me as an admission of failure.

I am concerned for friends who remain school principals. They now deal with a more complex set of circumstances involving even greater administration effort, as well as welfare responsibilities, in a climate of social breakdown and family violence.
Murray Hall,

Fatal despair

Is the prevalence of suicide, as Richard Eckersley of the Australian National University claims (The Age, 18/8), indicative of something wrong in Western societies? Is the modern world, for many, too ruthless, soulless and, ultimately, unrewarding? In a market-driven society where unpaid overtime seems almost obligatory, and the price of "success" and advancement could well be growing estrangement from loved ones at home, does it all suddenly seem futile for some after years of routine? Are those without jobs, dependent on welfare, made to feel like pariahs?

But even if some of these factors were shown to contribute to the rise of fatal despair among middle-aged men, would the doctrine of economic rationalism hold any less sway in the corridors of power?
Peter Kartsounis,

The Government is concerned

The increasing number of men choosing to end their lives is of major concern to the Australian Government - and although there are many factors contributing to the despair that drives a man to contemplate taking his own life, family breakdown, as your article "The Family Court: is it pushing some men over the edge?" (The Age, 19/8) suggests, is perhaps the most common.

The recognition that men need greater help to cope with change saw the development of the Men and Family Relationships program, which recognises men have particular needs when seeking help with relationship problems. The program also assists organisations to develop more sensitive and responsive approaches to working with men.

A good example of government and community working together is the Dads In Distress program that began on the north coast of NSW. Sunday night is a hard time for separated fathers; it is the night they spend on their own after taking the kids back to Mum. The program provides a supportive environment where men can get together, reducing the loneliness that can lead to depression and suicide.

The Government also funds the Men's Help Line, an Australia-wide service operating 24 hours a day, seven days a week, to help men find the services and support they need. The number is 1300 78 99 78.
Larry Anthony,
Minister for Children and Youth Affairs,

Her Majesty's Tasmanian Butler?

Richard Butler must surely be the odds-on favourite for the title of hypocrite of the year. Having regaled us for years about how embarrassed he was to suffer the indignity of living under a "foreign" head of state, he is now set to become one himself - even though he never actually lived in Tasmania, he is now about to lord over it as Governor (The Age, 19/8).

How does Tasmanian Premier Jim Bacon justify this decision? I seem to recall that one of the strong arguments run by republicans in the 1999 referendum was that there must surely be someone good enough among 19 million Australians to be our head of state. Yet Mr Bacon obviously thinks that nobody among half a million Tasmanians is good enough to be theirs.
Ben Davies,

Super China

In pointing out China's economic growth rate of between 7 and 8 per cent and the benefits such statistics may offer Australian industry (Editorial 19/8), we should also consider the implications of China becoming a powerful, post-modern, technologically advanced nation in the not so distant future and presenting an unwelcome challenge to present US hegemony. Even a united Europe inclusive of Russia, which is an unlikely scenario, would remain a lesser power than the US. But China may well give cause for serious concern.
William Mark Hardiker,

Missing name on the Idi Amin list

Most Australians who know of the importance of human rights would agree with the sentiments expressed in your editorial (18/8) on the death of Idi Amin and the importance of the International Criminal Court. However, I thought it a pity that Indonesia was not included among your examples of places where perpetrators of human rights atrocities, like Idi Amin, escaped trial and punishment.

Most of the Indonesian war criminals are unlikely to face justice or will receive extremely light sentences for their genocidal policies in West Papua, East Timor, Aceh and parts of Indonesia such as Kalimantan and Maluku (the Moluccas), in the past 40 years. This is because Western leaders, in particular, want to forget these crimes that have been committed on our doorstep.

And now our PM and Foreign Minister are trying to justify their moves to resume co-operation with Kopassus, the section of the Indonesian military (TNI) responsible for most of these crimes against humanity.

To be consistent, our Government should be insisting that there be no co-operation with the TNI until all war criminals in its ranks have been tried at the International Criminal Court - and cease the farcical trials presently occurring at the Jakarta human rights court.
Andrew Alcock,
Forestville, SA

Constructive engagement

Recent press might suggest that our relationship with Indonesia is solely focused on dealing with terrorism. However, AusAid and the Indonesian-Australian Specialised Training Project (and in this case the Centre for Developing Cities, at the University of Canberra) has been running a major training program in six regional areas of Indonesia on district and provincial planning during the past year.

The IASTP program involves Australian and Indonesia trainers working together with public officials facing immediate issues of poverty, water quality, housing, transport, education and community health. A strong theme through all the work is improving transparency and accountability in decision-making.

During my work there during the past 12 months, the spirit of goodwill between the Australian and Indonesian participants has been strong and the benefit has been one of collaborative learning. More attention should be given to the really constructive and positive relations being developed in programs such as these that contribute to improving living conditions in Indonesia and arguably assist regional security much more significantly in the long term.
Barbara Norman,
program director, environment and planning,
RMIT University

Missing voices in the Kew debate

Kenneth Davidson (Opinion, 18/8) advises us to "listen to the families" of the people who live at Kew. But while I acknowledge the expertise of parents, the voices we must also listen to are those of people with intellectual disability themselves. It is their voices that are missing from the current debate.

While not all people with intellectual disability can speak for themselves, a significant number can and do - sometimes with the support of self-advocacy organisations. The view of those people I have met, many of whom have spent half a lifetime in institutions, has been a resounding "no" to institutional life. Research, too, here and overseas, that has sought the views of people with intellectual disabilities who have moved out of institutions, consistently finds positive outcomes and no wish to return.
Dr Christine Bigby,
school of social work and social policy,
La Trobe University

Dancing to the mullahs' tune

The first group of failed Iranian asylum seekers could be deported within days under the terms of Australia's Memorandum of Understanding with the Islamic Republic of Iran (The Age, 19/8). The terms of the agreement are a secret, supposedly at the request of the Iranians. Nonetheless, Philip Ruddock has disclosed at least this much: Australia will make no effort whatsoever to determine whether these people are imprisoned, tortured, or even executed for apostasy when they get back to Iran.

Mr Ruddock says that this is because the Australian Government "respects the principles of state sovereignty". This seems a bit rich given the Government's latest chapter in the ever-changing reasons for why we went to war in Iraq. Remember, we were right to intervene there to end Saddam Hussein's appalling human rights abuses - that's the latest story, anyway.

But even suppose you don't actually care what happens to these failed asylum seekers when they return to Iran, since when did the Islamo-facist regime in Tehran decide when we here in Australia could or could not know the terms of an agreement that our own elected Government has signed on our behalf?

John Howard claims that we decide who comes into this country. But does he also determine what we can know about how our own Government conducts business? Or will he leave that to the mullahs?
Dirk Baltzly,

Funny business

I must congratulate both John Howard and Simon Crean for recently stating that corporate donations to their respective parties will not influence policies. The congratulations is not so much for their sentiment, which is laughable, but for the fact that they were able to maintain a straight face while saying it.

I am also perplexed as to how the Australian Democrats are able to also accept corporate donations and yet assert that they "keep the bastards honest". If they do not believe that this constitutes a conflict of interest, they are in greater trouble than even they would dare to admit.

There is only one political party in Australia that has representation at both federal and state level that does not accept corporate donations. Would anyone care to guess which?
Christopher Paul,

Wallaby John

Could someone please remind John Howard that he is the Prime Minister of Australia and not a Wallaby? I cringe every time I see him going for one of his international morning constitutionals in his Wallabies trackie. Perhaps he could save us all a lot of money on security guards and embarrassment, and work out on a treadmill inside.
Anthea Conroy,
East Brighton


Lieber Herr Finch (18/9), Warum nicht vier Operetten und nur zwei Opern? Surely Strauss, Lehar, Zeller, Gilbert and Sullivan and Offenbach are as great composers as Puccini, Wagner and Verdi - and the plots are at least funny.

What is it with Anglophones, this snobbishness about "serious" music not being entertaining as well? Lighten up.
U-J. Schmid,

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