Thursday, September 10, 2015

Better Vans, Better Libraries

The rumors are true:  We got a new vehicle.

Here is the truth about driving a vehicle so far past its expiration date it's going all Kevorkian on you, begging for the sweet release of van-death:  Your children (and you!) will be almost indecently grateful for this new vehicle.  They care not one whit that this vehicle is not brand-new, or that it's not as fancy as some of its fellows out on the road; they're just happy to be able to hear again.  Every single time we've ridden in it, at least one of them has commented, "It's so quiet!"  I said nearly the same thing to Derek after driving it to the library last night.  "I cannot get over how quiet this van is.  I mean, it's seriously, like, silent."

Now, is it silent?  Of course not.  This is not a Tesla we're talking about here.  But it has zero, count 'em, ZERO holes in the muffler, nor does the flex pipe need to be replaced.  It has four, count 'em, FOUR working door handles, AND the back hatch opens.  And did I mention the heating in the back of the van?  Because it works!  It pumps out beautifully warm air at your command!  MAGIC!

Speaking of the library (I kind of did, buried somewhere in a paragraph up there), can I just say how marvelous it is to visit a 21st century library?  I remember the cruel limits imposed on me as a child, like three books is gonna last me more than a day, lady.  Do you know how many books we checked out last night?

That's a heavily cropped screenshot of our online account.  Between four of us, we got to check out 50 items.  And that's just at one library!

Now, the downside to this is that we go to more than one library on a regular basis, and we check out at least as many books at our small town library, and that's just a heck of a lot of books to keep track of.  We do have a system for all these library books, kind of, and we have yet to lose a book.  (*crosses fingers- knocks on wood- mutters a prayer*)  

Also:  Are 21st century librarians nicer, or is it just me?  I have some pretty cranky librarians populating my memory banks, but how much of that was actual crankiness and how much was those poor people reacting to me being a punk kid?  When it comes to librarians, our family is blessed with an embarrassment of riches.  Ah, but then again, I remember a librarian in Connecticut who was so determinedly hostile I found myself hoping she'd run afoul of an overloaded book cart one day.  I walked to her library many, many days, with an infant Adelaide strapped to my chest and my face stretched into a wide, wide smile, but apparently when a librarian chooses to use her not insignificant powers for evil it can even thwart attempts to kill someone with kindness.

She was rude and cold to this face, a face that has loved books since she was teeny tiny.  Librarian Most Vile and I did not become besties.

Thankfully, 95% of the librarians we've encountered in Iowa have been the very antithesis of LMV:  Kind and open and helpful and smart and funny, reinforcing my notion that book people really are the best people.

For all my book homies


  1. i feel like your title is missing a punchline, like 'better vans, better libraries, papa john's.' but maybe that's just me.

    and YES, book people ARE the best people.

  2. Hmmm, I've forgotten what's it's like to have a vehicle with working electric windows. Do your windows work?

    I'm sorry you never won over the librarian. I had a horrible experience with grouchy librarians when we first moved to Iowa almost four years ago, but we have since managed to elicit smiles from her.

  3. I know it is up to each individual to decide when and how they will buy a car for themselves (except it should not be up to my aunt - she should not have a car! but she does have a car! Aaaaah!) and that everyone has to take into account their own personal situation when making that decision, and if people want to be like my brothers and drive their cars into the ground, that's okay, but can I just say this: I am SO THANKFUL to you and to God that you got a different car.

    Now, what was it you were saying about librarians?

