Monday, November 30, 2009

Marc Mezvinsky is a lucky SOB

Marc Mezvinsky is one lucky guy.

The man who's marrying Chelsea Clinton

In this Dec. 1996 file photo, Chelsea Clinton, right, sits with ...

And not just because Chelsea Clinton is easy on the eyes. And not just because she's Stanford-smart, which is like Yale-smart without the evil.
No, Marc Mezvinsky is one lucky guy because he will be the only married man in the US who can rest assured that Bill Clinton won't hit on his wife.

Sarah Palin Finds Something Else She Can Quit

So Sarah Palin was in Washington State for Thanksgiving week, and the Tri-City Herald has this story:

Palin participates in Turkey Trot

By Kristin M. Kraemer, Herald staff writer

Most of the story deals with the creepy, cultish behavior of her fans, but there was also this little detail:

Palin had announced on Twitter that she would be running the 5k race organized by the Benton-Franklin Chapter of the Red Cross.

She didn't finish the race, opting to leave the course early to avoid more crowds at the end. About 40 minutes into the run, word started trickling out to people gathered at the finish line that she was gone.

Seriously, Sarah? You can't even finish a frakin 5-K for charity?
And I could understand if you didn't finish because you were too tired, I probably couldn't run 5 kilometers either, but no - you quit because you didn't want to deal with all these regular American folks that you claim to love so much and to represent and to be one of.

Even more pathetic, though are the Palin-worshipers who fawn over her everywhere she goes. The story in the Herald centers around creepy couple Cynthia and Gary Waddoups, who came to the 5-K just to bask in Palin's presence. No, really!

The Waddoupses have been watching Palin's Facebook page for announcements about her public appearances and upcoming Richland book signing. And it was all politics that drew them out early on the bitter cold holiday because "just being near her" was like a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

"Sorry, we're stalking Sarah Palin, I'm afraid," said Gary Waddoups.

"In a big way," his wife added.

And what do you do when you finally get to meet your hero?

Cynthia Waddoups' wish was fulfilled when she handed Palin two pairs of cashmere/wool socks she'd found in Walla Walla.

Socks? What the hell? You give her socks? Socks you found in Walla Walla?

So if I ever meet Keith Richards, I should present him with, what, some tighty-whiteys that I found in Kalamazoo?

she handed Palin two pairs of cashmere/wool socks she'd found in Walla Walla. One pair was for Palin's son, Trig, and she suggested the other pair could go to grandson, Tripp.

Palin immediately put the socks on Trig, then grasped Waddoups' hand and talked with her before moving on.

Good thing the baby is out in the cold morning air with bare feet.

"She was very nice," said Cynthia Waddoups. . . "That made our day," Gary Waddoups said of Palin. "Her reaction was so genuine. You wouldn't get that out of other people."

Right. No one else would pretend to like a crappy gift. Especially not someone with political aspirations.

But the thing that made me want to cry was this description of a button worn by another Palin fanatic:

. . . Thompson of West Richland, who wore a Rosie the Riveter pin with the words, "Women like Palin make America strong."

Yes, America is made strong by quitters.

Pathetic! Rosie the Riveter must be turning over in her grave.

And yes, I know Rosie the Riveter is not a real person. But Norman Rockwell is probably turning over in his grave.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Too Late!

Saturday, November 28, 2009

I Save You Ten Bucks

On Thanksgiving day, Mrs. Chaos, myself, and a friend saw
"The Road."

I don't want to spoil the plot, such as it is, for anyone who is going to insist on subjecting themselves to this movie, but I will just say thay, after the first 20 minutes or so, I spent the next Two Hours rooting for the main characters to commit suicide.

I know that this movie is getting good reviews, and yes the cast is terrific. And the movie is visually impressive. But it's all in the service of a go-nowhere plot that just drags on monotonously and repetitively. And the voice-over contains lines like this:
"When I have nothing else, I try to dream the dreams of a child's imaginings." (probably not an exact quote, but as close as I can remember)

The basic story is that some un-named catastrophe has killed all the plant and animal life on earth (except for a bunch of humans, for some reason)
The entire earth has gotten extremely cold, damp and cloudy. Cannibalism has become common. And this man and his young son are determined to stave off their inevitable doom long enough to get to the coast. They never explain why they are so hell-bent on getting to the coast, and when they do finally get there, and it's just as desolate and hopeless as everywhere else, they don't seem at all surprised or disappointed. And their pontless journey just goes on pointlessly until the father dies.

And I get that it's supposed to be about people trying to hold on to their last bit of humanity under completely inhuman conditions, or the power of mankind's survival instinct, or the strength of the father-son bond or what-the-fuck-ever, but honst-to-God, when you're trying to keep yourself from shouting at the screen "Just do it! Just shoot the kid then shoot yourself!" it's hard to really care about these sort of themes.

And early on in the movie, the father shows the son how to put the barrel of the gun into his mouth and pull the trigger "when the time comes," but somehow the time never ever comes. Even when the father is dying and leaving his Maybe-10-year-old son to fend for himself, he still doesn't put the poor kid out of his misery.

And this isn't even the most preposterous plot point. Earlier in the movie, the kid and his father find a waterfall cascading into a river. Even thought they are bundled up in parkas and wool hats and gloves, they decide to just strip off and go skinny-dipping, as if they were vacationing in the tropics.

Later, after finding an abandoned bomb shelter full of food, blankets, etc. the father decides that they have to leave because it isn't safe. Which wouldn't be strange except that we've already been shown that there is nowhere safe anywhere in the entire fucking world! So the choice is being in danger, but hidden away with food and shelter, or being in danger out in the open without food. And this goddamned genius picks the no food and shelter option?

And when they get to the coast, the father, who has been pretty understandably paranoid about letting the boy out of his sight, decides to leave the boy in a tent on the beach while he tries to swim out to an abandoned boat offshore to see if there is anything onboard that they can use. Oh, but he does give the kid the gun which at this point has exactly ONE BULLET left. So, yeah, he's probably pretty safe.

Anyway, I guess the short version of my first attempt at writing a movie review is this:
"The Road." Save your money.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Best Buy is Out To Get Us!

I'm really beginning to think that my theory from yesterday may be pretty right on. Just look how people are freaking out over a Best Buy ad!

Do you see anything scary in this ad?

Look closer!

So this has the nutsos in a freaking uproar.

Check out some of the messages they are leaving on Best Buy's website:

Posts: 11
Registered: 11-22-2009

Happy Eid Al-Adha?

I imagine that since you are celebrating a muslim holiday that commemorates human sacrifice to please Allah, that you will eventually print Merry Christmas on a weekly ad? Eid Al-Adha correlates to Nov 27-30, and I am okay wish wishing others a Happy Whatever during their respective holiday seasons. But if you cover one - you need to cover them all this Holiday Season - including Christmas.

I am thinking that if there is no Merry Christmas from Best Buy in an ad before Dec 25, that Best Buy will be losing my business.



Someone needs to tell the creatively named "Conservative" that Eid Al-Adha commemorates the day that God, the God in the Old Testament, The Old testament that is included in the Christian and Jewish Bibles, that God, told Abraham to sacrifice his son, then said "oh wow! You almost did it! I can't believe you fell for that! Seriously, though, don't kill your son, that just seems wrong."

So, it's not actually about human sacrifice, and the God in the story is Old Testament God (who is known in the Muslim world as Allah, known to the Jews as Jaweh, and known to Christians as God the Father)

New Member
Posts: 1
Registered: 11-23-2009

Re: Happy Eid Al-Adha?

So all of a sudden, this year you decide to be fair and acknowledge all holidays? or just eid aladha? Why is it that you didn't feel the need to acknowledge it in past years? Will you be celebrating all obscure ethnic/religious holidays or just this one? You insult all of the heros and innocent who died 911 by celebrating a holiday of the religion that said to destroy them! This PC crap is going waaaayyyy too far!!!

You stay classy, "Bass Girl!" There's never a bad time to bring up 9/11!

New Member
Posts: 3
Registered: 11-22-2009

As a Christian, I am sick of being accused of being a racist, or bigot. We all know how this story ends--BB will decide to pull ALL references to religious holidays AFTER the have posted the ad in the current weekly.

BB, America, and Americans will be pushed into a corner only so long before they begin to leave your business in droves.

See, I really am beginning to think that these people actually believe that Best Buy is "Pushing them into a corner" by acknowledging a non-Christian holiday.
And to this guy, the term "Americans" clearly refers to non-Muslim people, but he can't see why anyone would find him bigoted.

And check out the comments of "Free Republic" which is organizing a boycott of Best Buy:

I am buying both a laptop and desktop for myself this year and will get one of my daughters (the oldest) a laptop. My youngest continues to be a disappointment so she will not be recieving much. Anyway, money is no object because the specs I demand are way up there. I will wait and see what stores are celebrating Christmas as Christmas. Hanahka I can understand, anything else and I do not give my store that business.

Besides being a dick of a father, this dude apparently has decided that acknowledging the Jewey holidays can be tolerated, but that is it! Tolerance has its limits!

To: wally_bert

BB is a Mpls company. Mpls is overrun with ragheads.

18 posted on Sunday, November 22, 2009 8:34:38 PM by Eric in the Ozarks (Impeachment !)

To: Eric in the Ozarks
Mpls is overrun with ragheads. You can bet their corporate offices are full of them too.

I assume that BB refers to Best Buy, and Mpls refers to Minneapolis? And the term "ragheads" refers to the bigoted mindset of Eric in the Ozarks. (don't forget impeachment!)

It is time to reclaim Christmas.

Reclaim Christmas? Eid al-Adha runs for three days around the end of November. Some years it may coincide with Thanksgiving, but never Christmas! So from whom or what are these people going to "reclaim Christmas"?

When I was young, people wanted to reclaim Christmas from the retailers who were using a religious holiday as an opportunity to sell stuff. Now these people are upset if retailers DON'T use Christmas as a marketing tool. There's just no pleasing them. They have some sort of psychological need to feel righteous anger. So they will always find something that they can think is oppressing them, or victimizing them, or taking Christmas away from them.

Wow! I’m surrounded! There is a Best Buy across one corner of my neighborhood, and a MOSQUE around the other! YIKES!

I think this Eid is the goat Throat Slitting Holiday. Last year it was 250 goats that gave their lives for this bit of holiday cheer.

posted on Sunday, November 22, 2009 9:01:36 PM by left that other site (Your Mi'KMaq Paddy Whacky Bass Playing Biker Buddy)

So from this person's point of view, Best Buy, by wishing a happy holiday to Muslim customers, has, what, joined forces with the Mosque? And now they are surrounding Biker Buddy? Clearly in cahoots, plotting something nefarious!

To: Eric in the Ozarks
BB is a Mpls company. Mpls is overrun with ragheads.

I know you and I have discussed this before, but I want others to know you are not kidding. I haven't lived in the city proper for a few years now and have visited it less and less as time goes by.

Today we went to the Mall of America's Nickelodeon Adventure park for my son's birthday. Wow! At least a quarter or more of the ticket takers and ride operators were women in muslim garb. Ditto the clientele and workers in the stores. Women in headscarves at the Macy's and Bloomingdale's cosmetic counter, really?? It was amazing to me how much has changed in five years. We're "fully-stocked" here in the Twin Cities. Thanks bleeding heart, Scandinavian Lutheran social(ist) services.

Disclaimer: I'm Scandinavian and was raised Lutheran until the church left us.

Oh my God! They're Everywhere!
Muslim women working at Macy's? God knows what they're up to?
And somehow this is the fault of Lutherans? Let's get Garrison Keillor!

I really think that when these people see Muslims working in department stores just like "real Americans" it is somehow perceived as a threat. Somehow, if Muslim women can work at the same makeup counter as Scandinavian Lutheran women, that in some way diminishes the "real" American women. If American women are not given a higher status than Muslim women, these folks seem to feel like they are under attack. I don't get it, but i am going to work out the details of this theory. I think I'm on to something.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

The Persecution of Sarah Palin

It's just not fair! Poor Sarah Palin keeps getting picked on for no good reason!

If you don't believe me, just check out this new book about some stuff that happened!

And Matthew Continetti really knows what he's talking about. He is an associate editor at third-rate wingnut liar rag "The Weekly Standard"

So what does Mr Continetti have to say on the subject? Well, I'm sure as hell not going to buy a copy to find out, but let's see what I can find on the old web.

Here's an excerpt from the website "Conservative Book Service"

How the liberal media elite tried to destroy Sarah Palin -- and why their vicious tactics didn't work

The Persecution of Sarah Palin: How the Elite Media Tried to Bring Down a Rising Star

by Matthew Continetti

They did it to Dan Quayle, they did it to George W. Bush, and they've done it to numerous other conservative politicians:

Yes, they made Quayle and Bush incapable of stringing together a coherent sentence!
Actually, that's not really fair. Quayle could at least form sentences. The sentences were usually pretty stupid, but at least they were sentences. Bush? Not so much.

liberal media talking heads and late-night comedians chortle repeatedly and relentlessly over their flubs, their gaffes, their errors --

Does it ever occur to these folks that the actual problem is the flubs, gaffes and errors? Not the comedians pointing them out? Are Letterman, Leno, etc. just supposed to pretend that Bush wasn't saying exceptionally stupid things?

The plan is to get the whole country laughing at the victim of this tactic, so that his effectiveness on the national stage is ended, and his political career in ruins.

Honest to God! Do You really think that Jay Leno has an agenda beyond getting good ratings? If the Bush jokes or the Quayle jokes bombed, don't you think they'd find another subject of mockery? Do you think that the late-night comedians had a plan to destroy Paris Hilton's political career? No, she just made it easy for them, just like Quayle did, like Bush did, and like Palin does.

Another fearless conservative who has outlasted the liberal attack machine is Sarah Palin.

If by "outlast" you mean quits halfway through her first term, then yeah.

Continetti, a Weekly Standard staff writer, shows how quickly the liberal media turned on this small-town girl with lots of charm and ambition, who had a stellar record as Alaska Governor and impeccable credentials as a truly maverick politician.

Wow! Those sure are some credentials!

Honestly, a stellar record? Really? Do you know what stellar means?

America was initially enthralled with Palin

If by enthralled, you mean scratching their heads and saying "Sarah who?"

America was initially enthralled with Palin – but then came the avalanche of stories about her alleged mistakes in interviews, her daughter's out-of- wedlock pregnancy, her lack of experience, and worse.

You know how those stories could have been avoided? By not making embarrassing mistakes in interviews, by teaching her daughter how to avoid getting pregnant (rhymes with schmondom) and by having some relevant experience. And I don't know if you noticed, but Barack Obama's lack of experience was also a common theme in stories about him.

Corruption charges materialized out of nowhere.

Well, technically, most of them materialized out of her corrupt actions, but let's not split hairs.

Even her campaign wardrobe came under unprecedented scrutiny, as the Leftist elites pulled out all the stops in an effort to destroy her.

Did her $150,000 wardrobe get more negative attention than John Edwards' $400 haircut? Why would you expect Palin to not face the same kind of criticism that Edwards did?

I have a theory about these people. The sort of people who find Sarah Palin inspiring. I'm starting to think that they really can't distinguish between fairness and special treatment. That's why, for instance whenever there are gay people who want equal treatment, who want the same rights as breeders, the Palin types immediately start screaming about gay people wanting "special treatment" or "special rights." I used to think they knew that they were full of shit, but I'm starting to think that maybe they really can't tell the difference.

Maybe that's why when Palin gets asked a question that is absolutely typical of the type of questions asked of every political candidate, they really seem to believe that this is an unfair, "gotcha" question.

And seriously, who can't answer the question "what newspapers and magazines do you read?" Stop anyone on the street and ask them that question. They'll be able to tell you. I could abswer that question off the top of my head, and I'm not qualified to run for dogcatcher, let alone V.P.

Here's another excerpt, this time from "One News Now" the organization who sent me the e-mail alerting me to this book's existence:

Continetti says Sarah Palin represents most of what the left dislikes about the U.S. and wants to change. "She's a forthright Christian. She is a pro-life woman who doesn't subscribe to the establishment feminist narrative, and she hasn't hailed from elite schools on the east or west coast -- and yet she still claims to speak for Americans and presents a challenge to the Democratic Party," the associate editor notes.
Yes, she presents a challenge to the Democratic Party, the same way that the Central High Fightin' Spartans present a challenge to the Pittsburgh Steelers.

And I believe that the "establishment feminist narrative" would be something along the lines of "women are capable of holding any office, even governor or president" so Ms Palin might be seen as subscribing to that narrative.

Continetti contends the most egregious myth the media spread about Palin was that she is not the mother of her youngest child, Trigg. This rumor "emerged from far-left websites and then parroted on more prominently trafficked websites and then launched into kind of the ether there, being repeated actually in newspaper accounts of controversies surrounding Palin," Continetti explains. "I think that is probably the most disgusting, and I think Palin would agree."

Yeah, that rumor might have been more offensive if Sarah Palin hadn't hidden her pregnancy, and if it hadn't turned out that her teenage daughter actually was pregnant. When you've got the pregnant teen daughter, and the surprise birth from mom, you can see how that rumor could get started, right? Ordinarily, if blogger people were accusing someone's underaged, un-wed daughter of being pregnant, some righteous indignation might be in order. But if your underaged, un-wed daughter really is pregnant, well your phony outrage rings a little hollow.

Continetti says since Palin energized the Republican grassroots more than any other political figure in the 2008 campaign, she represented a threat to Barack Obama, and now she is a symbol of "someone who doesn't sit down and shut up when the liberal media and Democratic elites tell them to."

Yeah, that was actually the McCain staffers begging Palin to sit down and shut up.

One last thing. From "conservative Book Service"
One of the bullet points from their review:

The Bridge to Nowhere Project: How Sarah Palin ended this waste of taxpayers' money, but the media elites chose to highlight instead her initial support for the project -- in order to make her seem to be a conniving opportunist

I don't even have a joke here. Just reading that bullet point made me laugh out loud.
How dare the liberal media point out that Palin supported the Bridge to Nowhere before she opposed it? That would be like highlighting John Kerry's changes of mind. And they would certainly never have done that!

What a freaking joke.

Monday, November 23, 2009

A challenge to Carrie Prejean!

Hey Carrie. Remember when you said that conservative commentators would be thrown off the air for attacking a Democratic woman? And we all had a big laugh, and then said, "oh shit! She's serious?" And apparently you were actually serious about that even though it was just prima facia absurd? Remember that?

Well, Carrie, we're about to test your little hypothesis.

Today, both Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh called Democratic Senator Mary Landrieu a whore!

Literally. A whore.

Check it out.


Beck accused the Senate Democratic leadership of bribing Landrieu to get her vote on healthcare, “We’re with a high class prostitute. That’s what we’re with…You’re not sittin’ there in a back alley and sayin’ hey what do you say, five bucks? No, no, no this comes to your Four Seasons hotel room and does it right. There’s nobody that’s going to look at her and say oh my gosh you’re with a whore…”

Limbaugh said, “That may be folks, that may be, the most expensive prostitute in the history of prostitution, and she’s bragging about it. Mary Landrieu bragging about a $300 million payoff from Dingy Harry to get her vote on this healthcare scam on Saturday night.”

Now Ms Prejean, when Beck and Limbaugh are not thrown off the air, which they of course won't be, will you admit that you were wrong? I know, being a fundie wingnut means never admitting that you are wrong about anything, but still. It would just be nice to once hear one of these nuts admit to having been wrong about something.

I can't imagine what a pain in the ass these people must be when they are kids in school.
I picture something like this:

Teacher: Who can answer this question, what is two plus two?

Little Carrie: Oh! I know! It's five!

Teacher: No, sorry Little Carrie, the correct answer is four.

Little Carrie: No it isn't, it's five!

Teacher: I'm sorry, but it says right here in the teacher's edition that the answer is four.

Little Carrie: Your book is wrong.

Teacher: No, look, I don't even need the book, it's four. the answer is four.

Little Carrie: Maybe to you Ivy-League elites, the answer is four, but regular Americans just know in their gut that the answer is five.

Teacher: I went to Cal State Fullerton!

Little Carrie: Yeah, that's in the Ivy League!

Teacher: No, I promise you it isn't! CSUF is nowhere near the Ivy League.

Little Carrie: I never said it was!

Teacher: You certainly did!

Little Carrie: Why are you attacking me for my beliefs? If I believe that two plus two is five and Cal Stae Fullerton is in the Ivy League, that's my right as an American!

Teacher: It may be your right, but it's incorrect.

Little Carrie: You say it's incorrect, I say it's correct. Can't we just agree to disagree? Why do you think your opinion is more valid than mine? You're just an elitist!

Teacher: Look, it's not a matter of opinion, some things are just, oh fuck it, I need a drink!

Little Carrie: We'll just have to wait 'till we die, then Jesus will tell us what two plus two is!

Saturday, November 21, 2009


What's more fun than a Kitten?

A Drunk Kitten!

Of Course, the Morning after Can Be a bit awkward.

Sarah Palin Finds Something Else She Can Quit

From Mock, Paper, Scissors:

Angry crowd shouts at Sarah Palin at her book signing in Noblesville, Indiana on November 19, 2009 after Palin quits and refuses to sign books for around 300 families that spent about 3+ hours getting wristband and another 3+ hours waiting in line to get the Palin book signed. At Borders bookstore it was announced that 1,000 individuals would be given wristbands and could get two books signed each. By the time Sarah Palin quit, there were still about 300 individuals and there families who did not get even one book signed.

Tny Tim was way creepier than I remembered

from BoingBoing

Friday, November 20, 2009

Why I Steer Clear of Missouri

The Lafayette County Republican Central Committee is proudly celebrating a new crazy billboard on I-70 near Grain Valley. It calls for citizens to "starve the beast" and "vote out incumbents" -- and if that doesn't work, "PREPARE FOR WAR." (source)

Apparently, in Missouri it is perfectly acceptable to openly advocate armed insurrection against the government of the United States of America.

Also, it is apparently acceptable to just steal New Hampshire's state motto.

And using appalling grammar like "revolution of a corrupt government" is, I guess, one way to show your contempt for those Washington insiders and their grasp of the English language.

And yes, the Lafayette county Republicans are actually bragging about this billboard on their website. Check it out.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

New I-70 billboard replaces famed OBAMANATION sign. Reads: Vote Out Incumbents. Live Free or Die!

New billboard on I-70 replaces the nationally-and-highly publicized "Obamanation" billboard that quickly rose, in recent weeks, to statewide and national fame. (Sign is located east bound on the north side just before the Grain Valley exit).

And their assault on the English language continues unabated on this website of theirs.

Oh, and here is their previous billboard of which they seem to be so proud:
At least that one was just bug-eyed, poo-throwing crazy. It doesn't actually recommend an armed revolution (but only if option 1, tax evasion, doesn't work!)

So that's why we here in the Chaos compound tend to give Missouri a pretty wide berth. Because being in between Florida and Alabama is bad enough.

Oh, so THAT"S Why People Watch FOX!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Is this guy crazy or stupid, or just a lying scumbag?

So there's this website called "American Thinker."
And on this website is a guy who goes by the nom de plume "Robin of Berkeley"
And this guy is a sort of a cross between Glenn Beck and Jonah Goldberg.
He exists in this weird nexus of crazy and stupid, a condition I will call "crapid." (tm)
It rhymes with "vapid."

I honestly can't tell whether this person actually believes the nonsense he's writing or just figures his readers are dumb enough to believe it.

He starts out this particular column with a quote from John Lennon, which seems promising.
We're playing those mind games together
Pushing the barriers,
Planting seeds
Playing the mind guerrilla
Chanting the mantra, peace on earth
-John Lennon

But after reading the body of his text, it becomes apparent that this is not so much an homage to the late great Beatle as it is a symbolic disinterment of Lennon's body followed by a symbolic raping of said body atop the grave of George Harrison.

It's a chilling moment when the light goes out in someone's eyes. A once-radiant child hardens from abuse. A woman's heart shrinks after her husband's abandonment.
The person looks the same, maybe acts the same. But something is gone, and what's lost is irretrievable. It's like when a person dies: in a heartbeat, the soul vanishes.

Which, oddly enough is the look I had on my face after I finished reading this article.

I witnessed this alteration recently when I visited my goddaughter, a radiant girl. Her mom, a hardcore progressive, has started exposing her to the darkest elements of the left. And the last time I looked in the girl's eyes, the light had gone out. Disappeared. Just like that.

Okay, couple of things here.
One- what "hardcore progressive" would ask you to be the godfather to her child?
Two- what exactly are these "darkest elements of the left"? Has the light gone out in this little girl's eyes because her mother explained the progressive income tax to her? Has her mother shamelessly exposed her daughter to the idea that Medicare could be expanded to non-senior citizens? That would sure kill the light in my eyes! Did her mother dare to tell her that the minimum wage was too low, or that Unions have done a lot to improve the lives of working folks?
Of course, Robin never specifies what these supposed "darkest elements"are. I guess he just assumes that his readers will fill in the blanks with whatever devilment they think progressives practice. "Why, I'll bet that mother taught her daughter to be a Muslim lesbian!"

I see this phenomenon every day: a light dimming. The friendly shopkeeper snaps at me. My cheerful neighbor seems flattened.

Where do you live that there are still "shopkeepers?" Is your house in 19th Century London?

Also, I have to think that if everyone you come into contact with seems upset, maybe it's you.

And you hear it in the news: people acting strangely, going off the deep end. The most bizarre behavior becoming the new normal.
A thug bites off a finger. Sarah Palin's church is torched. Bullies intimidate voters. . . .Why now?

Yes, why now? Why would someone torch a church now? that certainly has never happened before! Except that the US Dept. of Justice said this 10 years ago:
The NCATF [National Church Arson Task Force] has opened investigations into 670 arsons, bombings or attempted bombings that have occurred at houses of worship between January 1, 1995, and September 8, 1998.

And never before has a thug bit off part of another man's body!

Why now? This may be the most important question of our time. Why are some people reaching the boiling point? Why do many others look vacant, like an Invasion of the Body Snatchers? The shootings at military bases, from Little Rock to Fort Hood -- why now?

Ooh, I wonder what answer he'll come up with?

Wait for it. . . . .

It's Obama, of course.

Wow! Never saw that one coming!

Liberals will excoriate me for writing this. They'll insist that bad behavior is not Obama's fault. He's a man of peace.

Stupid liberals will ignore the fact that there never was any bad behavior until Obama became president!

But study the phenomenon of cults, and the dynamics are always the same. The leader can incite violence without ever getting his hands dirty. Obama is controlling the marionette of the masses.

And this statement needs no backing up at all. No evidence of any kind needed to defend this toatally obvious fact of trueness!

If Obamamania is a cult, then Obama is the cult leader.

Yes. If Obamamania existed, then perhaps Obama would be the leader of this thing that would exist.
Also, if the New York Yankees are a cult, then George Steinbrenner is the cult leader!
And if the Oprah Winfrey Show is a cult, then Oprah Winfrey is a cult leader!

I don't understand why some people seem to find Obama's popularity so ominous. Why would you think it strange that a fellow who was elected president would be well-liked and popular? Remember when Bush was super-popular after 9/11? You know, before most people realized what a colossal fuck-up he was? Why weren't these fucktards concerned about Bush-o-mania back then?

Cult leaders routinely pull the strings of their followers. The most extreme example is Charles Manson. He rots in prison for murders he never committed. He didn't have to do the dirty work. His brainwashed charges did his bidding.

Um hm, and this is relevant because. . .?
I'm not saying Obama is a Charles Manson.

Of course, I'm not saying he isn't!

I'm not saying Obama is a Charles Manson. There are varying degrees of manipulation, from using sexy blondes to entice men to buy cars all the way to hypnotizing them to drink poisoned Kool Aid. But there's a common denominator in all mind control: manipulating people through mind games.

So there is a continuum from automobile advertisements to Jonestown? And Obama is somewhere on this continuum? Well, since the continuum would necessarily include just about fucking everything and everyone, yeah I guess he would be.

As soon as Obama came on the scene, the programming began. His face was plastered everywhere like Mao.

Right, because major-party presidential candidates are rarely paid attention to. No other candidates had their faces on magazine covers or paid for billboards, TV commercials or yard signs! Clearly if someone becomes well-known, that's just like being Chairman Mao!

Hey, look! It's the Chairman Mao of the 1990's!

In his speeches, Obama lulled audiences with a melodious voice and feel-good phrases repeated over and over. And he began inciting people with his charming smile.

Oh! My! God! It's totally true, you guys! Obama DOES have a pleasant speaking voice! And a nice smile! I'm totally getting incited! Incited to, um, go and uh, do . . . something? I guess?

First, the vultures starting swooping down on Hillary. Obama chose not to call off the dogs.

Maybe the dogs were trying to protect Hillary from the vultures?

Then thugs invaded caucuses. Again, silence.

Silence! After the thing that never happened! Shame, shame, shame!

Which led to vicious misogyny against Sarah Palin and threats on her life. From Obama: not a peep.

Okay, when was palin's life ever threatened? And what vicious misogyny was aimed at her? I remember people at palin's rallies shouting "kill him!" whenever sarah mentioned Barack Obama. And I remember her smiling her charming smile and saying nothing, but who was threatening Palin? again, no documentation, no evidence, no links to news stories regarding palin's life being threatened, we're just supposed to accept this as established fact?
And as for misogyny, to what are you referring there? People pointing out that Palin was an empty-headed, inexperienced demagogue is not misogyny. It's just pointing out the obvious. But of course, blame the messenger. Poor little Sarah has to always be the victim!

We even saw armed thugs at polling places. Ignored and not prosecuted by Obama's Attorney General.
Also, we saw unicorns and mermaids! Then the drugs wore off.
After the drugs wore off, we also realized that it would have been George W. Bush's Attorney General who would have been the one declining to prosecute, since Obama would not take office until Jan 20, AFTER the ELECTION!

The moment Obama became president, he upped the signals. At the swearing in, the entire family eerily chose to wear black and red, colors associated with communism and black nationalism.


He gave a white police officer a dressing down for doing his job, in effect calling him a racist.

Yes, specifically avoiding calling the cop a racist, then sharing a beer with him is, in effect, calling him a racist!

Obama's greatest magic trick? Brainwashing the masses to believe that racism is a greater danger than radical Islam, and that Obama himself is in constant peril.

Who has been brainwashed? Do you know how hard it is to brainwash someone? The Vietcong tried for how many years to brainwash John McCain and couldn't do it. Granted, John McCain was a tougher SOB than most, but still, it takes a lot of concentrated effort and a lot of time to brainwash...but perhaps I've said too much!

Oh, and as far as Barack Obama "brainwashing" people to believe that he himself is in constant peril? Just look at this headline from the London Guardian:

Barack Obama faces 30 death threats a day, stretching US Secret Service

Yeah, that's 30 death threats EVERY FUCKING DAY! So, I'd say he's in a certain amount of peril!

Opposing health care means you oppose Obama. Oppose Obama and you're part of a vast right-wing racist conspiracy.

No, opposing health care means you are an asshole who doesn't mind that a lot of sick people don't have access to affordable medical treatment. And you are part of a vast stupid-wing carnival of dickishness.

Thus, more and more people are finding themselves on the receiving end of a fist, figurative or literal

Ow! The figurative fist!

After the White House released a directive for his followers to strike back hard, a frail, diabetic black man at a Town Hall was beaten up.

Ok, we've been over this already, remember?
The frail black man was not beaten up. There was no order given to "strike back."

Even women can get slugged in the face. Obama signaled during the primary that women were fair game.

What? What the fuck are you talking about? When did candidate Obama signal that it was OK to punch women? That just goes beyond ludicrous! Do you mean that the fact that he defeated a woman in the primaries was some sort of indication that he condones violence against women?

Anyway, this clown goes on for awhile in this same vein, and I'm too tired to deal with anymore of it. If you want to read the whole thing, it's here. I do just want to highlight one more sentence, though. Speaking of violent fringe groups from the '60's and '70's he writes:

Patty Hearst morphed into bank robber Tania after weeks of isolation, rape, and beatings by the SLA.

So here, he kind of refutes his own earlier claim that Barack Obama has brainwashed the American people. See, this is the kind of effort it takes to brainwash someone. weeks of isolation, beatings and rape. Not appearing on television and speaking in a pleasant tone.

So I'm still not sure if this "Robin of Berkeley " actually believes his own b.s. I don't know if he's that stupid, or that crazy, or if he's just that scummy. But I know my head hurts after reading just one of his crapid articles.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

I think She Lost a bet

From AFP

I get screwed again!

Johnny Depp wins his 2nd 'Sexiest Man Alive' title

Seriously, People magazine?

You're telling me this:

Is sexier than THIS?

Obviously, the fix was in! Hey Depp, who'd you sleep with to win this one?

Eeeww! Never mind. You earned it.

Oh, this just keeps getting better!

According to super-reliable wingnut site "NewsMax" there is a possibility of a Palin/Beck ticket in 2012.

Palin-Beck Ticket? Sarah Doesn't Rule it Out


No, even sillier!

It's no secret that former GOP vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin and Fox News host Glenn Beck share great respect and admiration

So I guess you have to be as crazy as Glenn beck to admire Sarah Palin, or as dumb as Sarah Palin to respect Glenn Beck? Yeah, that adds up.

. . .so their fans can be forgiven for wondering: Is a "dream ticket" of Palin-Beck ticket completely out of the question?

No. No they can not be forgiven for wondering that. They can be pitied, they can be ridiculed, they can be shunned for considering Palin and Beck a "dream ticket," but not forgiven.

"I can envision a couple of different combinations, if ever I were to be in a position to really even seriously consider running for anything in the future, and I'm not there yet," Palin tells Newsmax. "But Glenn Beck I have great respect for. He's a hoot.

I'm sorry, a hoot? Did you really say he's a hoot? You have great respect for Glenn beck because he's a HOOT?
He's a hoot. He gets his message across in such a clever way.

I don't think you know what the word "clever" means.
Or the word "message."
Mouth-frothing, bug-eyed, baboon-ass crazy is really not a "clever" method of getting one's "message" across. And wild paranoid bouts of lunacy are not really "messages."

And he's so bold, I have to respect that.

maybe you have to, but the rest of us sure as hell don't.
He calls it like he sees it, and he's very, very, very effective."

I don't think you understand what the word "effective" means. Perhaps you meant to say Defective? Also, there's got to be a limit on how many "very's" you can string together in one sentence. I think the limit is probably one, I'd be willing to accept two, but three just means you couldn't come up with a better word.

So in summary, I guess I would just add: Please, God let this happen. A Palin/Beck ticket would be the political train-wreck of the century.

A Palin/Beck ticket would be the "Beyond the Valley of the Dolls." of Presidential politics.

Palin and Beck would be the Gary Busey and Nick Nolte of national campaigns.

A Palin/Beck ticket would be the political equivalent of OJ Simpson and Phil Spector being tried together for killing Micheal Jackson. With Paris Hilton as the prosecuting attorney.

Seriously, Palin and Beck would be to politics what BritneySpears and Lindsay Lohan are to Hollywood.

Palin and Beck would be the Amy Winehouse and Pete Doherty of the campaign trail.

I got a million of 'em!