• Arden Palmquist

21 Things I've Learned By 21

Well, I have just recently turned twenty one and not only was the weekend very tiring but I've done a lot of reflecting lately. There are a lot of blog posts where people share what they've learned by a specific age, I get that. But when I read those posts, I learn a little more about the world which is so interesting to me. So, listen closely because you might be able to learn something too.

1. It's not the end of the world.

Literally this is the one thing that I have not been able to fully understand until recently. I am so young, I still have so much to experience and I have so much to see. The pain that you feel right now, it's not going to be there forever. I know that it is hard to hear and hard to understand but pain is temporary. It isn't the end of the world, sometimes it may feel like it, but it's not.

2. YOU come first.

I've never been the person to put myself first. I guess it wasn't because I didn't know how. I always felt the need to make sure everyone else was happy before I was happy. News flash, that's not how it's supposed to work. Be a little selfish, it's your life. Live it.

3. Stepping outside of your comfort zone is scary but thrilling.

Recently, I've done a lot of stepping out of my comfort zone. At first, it's scary.. It really is. But then you get a rush of excitement because you're moving on and upward. A big reason that I've grown so much is because of the stepping out of my comfort zone. Not everything is going to work out the way you want or plan it to, but you learn from it. And if there is one thing you take away from this post is that it's always important to learn.

4. It's healthy to talk to someone

Okay, I still struggle with this one. But I'm learning that keeping everything bottled in gets tiring and there will come a point where you'll just break. Communication is important and it's healthy. Or if it isn't your speed, write it all down. Just make sure to get it out before you explode.

5. Self-Care is one of the most IMPORTANT THINGS.

This is a given. It just took me 21 years to understand that. Setting time aside for yourself every day is important. Start by doing it small, and then eventually, you'll create a whole self care routine. It honestly helped with my mental health so much.

6. Nothing lasts forever.

Just like pain and heartbreak, it doesn't last forever. Keep pushing through and learn from your experiences. You'll become stronger because of it.

7. Being organized is brilliant.

I cannot stress this enough. You just feel like your world is together when you're organized. Set aside 10 minutes once a week and plan your week out, make to do lists, update your planner. It's the small things that matter.

8. Educate yourself about the world.

There is so much out there, so much we don't know. But there is also a lot going on that we should be getting educated on. It's important to discuss issues and work together to educate people on them. I love learning about everything going on. No matter what it is.

9. Water should be your best friend!!!!!

HELLO, hydration is so fun. Always remember that!! It not only helps you stay alive but water is also good for your skin.

10. Always be prepared before a night out (honestly though)

Okay, make sure you have a full bottle of water next to your bed and a bottle of pain killers. I also always wear an eye mask and even when I'm not drinking it helps with sleeping and keeping your eyes hydrated. In the morning have a plan on where to eat that can help with how you're feeling.

11. It's okay to be selfish, but know when too much is too much.

Sometimes there is a fine line between being selfish and being too selfish. It's hard to understand the difference of putting yourself first and only caring about yourself. You just have to find that happy medium.

12. Trust your gut.

Usually it's right. My gut has always been right even when I tried proving it wrong. But it helped with learning life lessons. Moral of the story: just trust it.

13. The internet is... an interesting place.

From pop culture to politics to memes... The internet is something that has seemed to be extremely helpful but also toxic. I've had my fair share of both but I also like to look at the positives. A lot of my friends I have met from following them on social media. But one thing is for sure, always be careful.

14. Get knocked down, stand right back up.

This past year was one of the hardest years I have had to face mentally and physically. Constantly I was being knocked down and it was hard to get back up. But one thing I have learned is, it's apart of growing up and living life. It's not meant to be easy, you just have to be strong and rise above it all.

15. On the real note, my mom is my best friend

This I found out my senior year of high school. She was the one person I could always count on to make things better, to always listen. Plus, we both have similar tastes and love shopping together.

16. Networking is high key important

From what I've gathered, it's important to network. It's all about who you know, how you know them, and if they approve. Especially in the field I want to work in. Networking is very important and it's something everyone should start learning how to master.

17. Strong confident women can do anything... And I mean ANYTHING

I once had a friend tell me that boys are scared of women who know their self worth but men push her to continue to thrive. That... That spoke to me. Once you know your self worth, it's game over for everyone. Nothing can stand in the way of a strong confident woman. We go after whatever we want because we know we have that power.

18. Continue to dream big and chase your dreams

For the longest time, I was so worried about keeping up with a blog because I was worried people would judge my dreams. Which, looking back now, is sad. Dream big and accomplish it. You only get one life, do you really want to sit here and ask yourself "what if I just dreamed a little bit bigger?" when you could be telling yourself, "damn, I really did that."

19. Know that the positives will always outweigh the negatives

Mental health is tough. Especially when you've struggled with it for so long. It's like drowning and the positives don't seem like positives. I get that, I do. But lately, I've been telling and reminding myself that the positives always outweigh the negatives and once I kept reminding myself that, I believed that. Now, I tell my friends when they get down to list all the positives in their lives. Sometimes it's nice to be reminded of those small things.

20. Love the people around you, cherish them.

I cannot begin to explain how much I love the people in my life today. I am surrounded by people who are thriving, who have gone through so much and are concurring all of their demons, who continue to support me on everything I am doing. Losing yourself is never fun but you learn a lot on the way. One thing for sure is that I love and am so thankful for the people around me. They've seen me at a low and cheered me on when I tried to get back up.

21. LOVE yourself and BE yourself.

Don't let anyone ever tell you that you don't matter or that you can't be yourself. Don't let anyone tell you that you can't do this or you can't do that. There is only one you, and nobody is like you. So LOVE YOURSELF and BE YOURSELF. Be proud of that because if you are, you'll be able to do anything you set your mind too.

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