Strong Women Need Strength (Part 2)

In the last month, I’ve been told by two different women that they would either be scared to date me, or not know what to think of me if they were a guy. One was referring to my physical strength, and the other to my personality. She said my personality would be “confusing.”

This got me thinking. Strong women not only need strength from their men, but from other women too. We should be applauding someone out there achieving their goals, who’s not just focused on finding a husband!

Stop conforming to what the Lost Boys are looking for. They want a girl that either can’t, or won’t challenge them in any way. The “go along with everything, no matter what I may want, or have time for” type of girl. When one girl tells another that she couldn’t date her if she were a guy, it’s just helping those guys, who are trying to skate through life doing as little as possible, with the most amount of ass as possible, expand their terrible dating standards for women.

Who cares if a woman is more focused on her career than what she’s going to wear on her date that night?! Why is it a big deal if she’s not super excited to be going on another first date? I am not gonna get excited about hanging out with a guy until I know that he is the type of man I want to spend some of my time with.

As far as not wanting to date me because of how physically strong I am, PLEASE… I cannot take away his manhood with how much I can lift, or the fact that I can do pull-ups. Just about all of being a man lies in his persona. I personally love the gender roles where a man holds the door, carries things, or walks on the side closest to the street. Me being able to lift more than some of the guys out there is not going to take away from that, unless they let it.

From one woman to all of you strong women out there, keep it up. You are amazing. You inspire me to be the best version of myself that I can be. I am going to be that version with or without a man in my life. Count on that.

Perfection Should Be a Feeling, NOT a standard. (30 day challenge)

funny or die house sxsw 2016
Photo by Riley Blanks Photography

Have you ever had the perfect bite of dessert? Yeah, me too! However, I bet yours was different than mine. That’s why some people are edge of the pan brownie people, while others want that middle of the pan piece. Then there’s me, I just add water to the mix, throw it in the fridge, and eat it with a spoon!

All of those are perfect options for different people, and I feel safe betting that if you’re reading this, you can agree with that point. Let them eat the brownie (mix) they like, right? Okay, so why can’t we do this for ourselves when it comes to how we look? For other people? Why are we setting these crazy, unattainable, standards for ourselves that are being accepted as a norm?

If you have full thighs, celebrate them! Stop trying to attain a thigh gap that you genetically shouldn’t have. Be thankful if you have an hourglass figure, stop thinking about muffins when you look at yourself in the mirror. (Unless you are turned on by muffins. Then you keep on thinking of those delicious muffins.) If you have a thigh gap, and you cannot make your thighs touch no matter how much you squat and eat, and squat and eat, love your long beautiful legs.

I want you to think of the outfit in your wardrobe that you look best in, you own shit in, you walk down the street and everyone KNOWS how good it looks. You know why everyone knows? ‘Cause YOU know! And every step you take exudes that. You know why that is? Cause you feel sexy! Maybe your eyes pop, maybe your butt looks cute, or maybe you just have no worries in this outfit. Whatever it is, you feel it. You feel it as you currently are. Nothing has changed! So why do you let that feeling go away?

I’m not saying we should all stop trying to make improvements, but I am saying that we should be realistic about where we want to be. At some point, we have to realize when we are taking it too far. Focusing on “imperfections” and negative self-talking are only going to bring us down. You get the same kind of energy you put out, even from yourself!

My 30-day challenge to all of you: Write down your top 3 goals. Put that paper away.

Wake up every day for the next 30 days, and write down 3 positive things, or things you are thankful about YOURSELF. Doesn’t have to be physical. ANYTHING.

At the end of the 30 days, read through that list (There will NINETY great things about you on that list!), and re-read your goals. Have they changed? If so, write the new ones down. Whether they’ve changed or not, get started on those goals, but now with a positive vibe running through your mind.

Post your positive vibes on social media. Use the hashtag #30daysofpositive. Share the love!  ❤

It’s time to find perfection in what we currently have.