Thursday, September 26, 2013

The Latest, Greatest Low Tech Devices

I am device rich. My calendar is always with me to schedule the next dentist appointment or to remind me to pick up a kiddo.  My map tells me where to go when I'm lost (which happens a fair amount.) To see if a store is open, I only need to dial a number. Hmm, that cloud looks app lets me know to grab an umbrella.

But being device rich can mean being quality time poor.

No worries though, because I have the latest in low tech technology!

Clearly this little piggy is an
excellent listener!
(Ben Earwicker via
Arms!  Yes, arms. They are wonderful for turning the wheels on the bus round and round.  These security devices make crossing the street with a kindergartener safe.  They are the perfect utensil for eating baby carrots. You can't beat arms for wrapping up little ones (and big ones) in hugs.

Once you have arms, you really need to get another device...

Mouth! This ultimate multi-functional tool can be used for singing about twinkling little stars, kissing booboos, and saying I love you.  You really can't make a high quality funny face without a mouth- you gotta get one of these!

I've had another device for a long time, but the instructional manual is so confusing.

Ears.  I recently learned you have to clean all the potatoes out of them to improve sound quality. Then, you need to stop cooking, take a break from laundry, and put down all your other devices. Finally, lower the ears to the right level of the person using their mouth device which may require kneeling down to interact with a 3-year-old. Don't forget to turn off your own mouth device!  

Now you can use your ears to really listen to all the very important things happening in the lives of your little people. Ears may be the most important device I have.

What is your favorite low tech device? 

Thursday, September 12, 2013

Back to School

Imagine you're walking down the street when a smell tickles your nose. Are you being followed by a young man fresh out of gym class who is not yet wearing deodorant even though it really is prime time to start? Though you try to resist, you take another sniff of the air. You catch a touch of banana peel left in the car for a week with a hint of day old peanut butter and jelly crust.

You start to look around for an overflowing trash can causing the attack on your nasal passages, but instead you find some sort of creature. You quickly snap your eyes forward. Was that Medusa?  No, a pinch on your wrist confirms you have not turned to stone.

You shouldn't turn around; mother always said it wasn't polite to stare. But out of a valid concern Godzilla is following you, you take a quick peek. It appears to have human eyes, though the sunken eyes have dark circles under them. Realizing this is just a vagrant, you sit on a bench and allow yourself a long look.

Sometimes you just know
a kid is going to grow up
(copyright Lauri Meyers)
It's a woman, you decide, with her long hair sticking out wildly on every side. Looks like an odd tattoo on her arm - no, it's just a streak of ink. Her lips are moving, and you hear her mumbling something like, pick up the tap shoes, get a size three soccer ball, smock for class, permission slip...

It's back to school week this week! I have been shuttling both kids, packing enough snacks and lunches for a short voyage, and signing more papers than the president. I didn't follow the advice about getting into the sleep routine before school, and the kids have been up at night all week. And I look like it.

I'm too embarrassed to take a picture of my harried self.  Luckily, I have no problem selling out my five-year-old self! Just age the picture to the right by a few decades and you get the picture. 

I hope we settle into routine soon, so I can actually get a bit of writing done. First, I seriously need to go take a shower. 

How is back to school going in your neck of the woods?
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