Well hello! Long time no see!

I have been busy selling houses, living with my parents, trying to stay employed in the day job, and finally, finding my new house! So exciting!

But back to writing and reading since that’s what we are here for.

I recently hooked up with a group of local writers in the Denver area. We created a writing group, and I do mean writing group. All we do is get together and write. No work shopping, or critiquing, we just write. As in sit around in a public place together and not talk, just type on our laptops or tablets.

It’s great for productivity and accountability which is so important in the writing world.

So how does this relate to Sex scenes? Well one of my buddies in the group suggested me for some panels down at Galaxy Fest and I jumped when they came calling. I even ran my own panel, with the help of AL Kessler, an amazing Paranormal Romance author.


(Because only at Comic Con like festivals can you find two Dinos necking.)

We had a great time and a great turnout. I promised some additional sources and articles on the subject of writing sex scenes along with the handout I gave to the class. So without further ado:

A few of my basic tips to get you started:

1. Get Drunk.
“They don’t call it Social Lubrication for nothing.

2. Do the things that get you in the mood.
3. Privacy is a good thing.
4. Here comes the fun part: Do your research.
5. Get everything out in one session.
6. Don’t look back until the next day.
7. Please avoid the following words:

Moist: Unless you are talking about Duncan Hines here, there is nothing sexy about that word.

Turgid: Sounds like a mix between a turbin and a turd. Not something I want to think about when I’m getting into sexy time.

“The tell tale rip of foil.” I’m all for safe sex but that term is trademarked by EL James, aka fifty shades.

The five sexy moments in books:
1. The first encounter.
2. The moments of sexual tension.
3. The seduction.
4. The act.
The morning (or moment) after.

Now let’s talk about adding some flavor and spice to your words.

Your assignment is to turn your audience on. Let them escape into your writing. Bring them into the scene by making them feel as though they are actually there. No, I’m not talking about some creeper sneaking a peek. So how do we do this? By engaging all of their senses!

How do we do this? By weaving them into all of our sexy scenes. We don’t just use these to set the scene in our books, we use these to help our readers more fully engage in the story.

Using the five senses.

Touch: (Known as the bad touch, this obviously is a no brainer.)

See: (Once again, one of the main attractions to attraction.)

Taste: (Yeah, yeah snicker, snicker. But besides the obvious what sort of tastes case weave into a love scene?)

Hear: (There’s a reason they have all those plastic ladies moaning like a bad ghost from Scooby Doo and screaming like a zombie just got into her bedroom. The sounds we make are primal and sexy.)

Smell: (What sort of scents does he have that rile you up? Is thee a delicate trace of lavender on her skin? Can they smell the salty sea air, drifting in from an open window? According to science, smell is our strongest signal to the other sex that we are ready and raring to go.)

How do we take all of these wonderful senses and melt them together to cook something smoking hot in and out of the bedroom?

And another article that I found after I had written out my basic how to’s. I swear I didn’t copy her, but it was hilarious we had so many of the same ideas: I found this off of Chuck Wendig’s website. This was originally written by Delilah S. Dawson.

Write world

From Write World, a whole cache of good articles.

And as always, please let me know if you have any questions on this subject. Send me an email I will be happy to help you out.



Leave a Reply
