Reader discretion is advised. This article is written not to attack any individuals am just telling it like i see it. Your name determines your character just like characters determine pet names. Here are my samples, any corrections or sentiments are welcomed …

1. Jackie.

She is a friend to everyone. Everyone loves her. She is that lucky girl, that’s just how she  rolls.

2. Michael.

Always fly as hell and smoother than a phone operator. The good thing about Michael is that his looks don’t override the gentleman in him. However, Mike is a player. His looks will always override his manners, so beware there is a difference.

3. Rosey/Rosie.

She is exquisite. Named derived from rosemary leaves, an awesome spice that smells sweet and used as a cooking herb. Rose flowers again, awesome flowers. She is an attention whore leaving her to be most often than not the talk around town. Somehow she occasionally she gets in trouble with her mum.

4. Joe.

From ladies to paraphernalia, Joseph is a perfectionist. Name derived from Jesus’ earth-dad who was a carpenter. P.s all carpenters are near perfectionists otherwise why do they randa stuff? Joe likes his women just how he dreams of them, nothing more or less. He is however a player. He is very good at praising the females but at the end of the day, all he wanted was some … Once he starts on pursuing a girl, Joe never gives up!

5. Emma.

She is a very principled girl, not the type of girl you find out on all the weekends but the type of girl you want to marry or at least take home to your mother. She is a neat freak, it’s no wonder Home science was her favourite subject in primary school.

6. Chris/Jack

These are two persons with similar characteristics. He is very funny and interesting but here’s the catch, he is a hunter! He will pursue his prey, get her then nail her and then break her heart. He finds pleasure in this, in fact his motto says, ” You have to break a heart to get noticed.”  Too bad he never gets to give his heart time to ever try to love.  If given a second chance to life, he would be Joseph.

7. Eva.

She is more often than not shorty- height wise. She is also a diva with an eternal graceful charm. Given a dramatic situation, she can be one helluva conniving bitch. Oh did i mention? She’s smoking hot too!

8. James/Jamo/Deno.

James and Dennis can either be the perfect gentleman or the complete opposite. He loves the extreme side of life, be it sex or sporting adventures. Jaymo is a thug! He rolls with all the honeys. James got that ngeli ya Kiswahili hookup. Despite his flaws his communication skills are perfect. He will just convince your bride to give him a BJ at your wedding reception!

9. Samantha/Summer.

pretty has to be her middle name. She is so adorable and everyone wants to be her friend. Perception stipulates that she is the party animal but deep down she’s in sync with her inner self.

10. Victor.

He is intelligent, suave, and a schemer. He is into weird stuff as a means of escapism. From what? I don’t know. He keeps a lot of things very private. When you get to learn who Vic really is, you will understand that he never compromises what he holds dear, NEVER!

11. Joyce/Joy.

Just like her name’s prefix suggests she is a joyful girl. Always smiling and happy. She is also a lucky girl but not as lucky as the Jackies. However, her happy image can limit her from opening up when she is sad. This personality also makes her do evil things secretly because anyway no one would ever suspect her.

12. Albert.

He is either fat or in perfect shape! He is the genius who uses silence as his weapon but when in the moods he can get sooooo loud and loose. He likes to keep when he finds what he is looking for. This is ambiguous it could be food, money, a woman name it.

13. Shirleen.

Just like Rosey she is a gem, rare to find but special in her own way. She got a very big and adorable personality, she the best friend forever type of girl. However, she is very insecure and if she doesn’t control herself she could end up schizophrenic.

14. Robert/Robe.

He is a sex addict. Quite persuasive when he wants a girl. He doesn’t deter as his vibe is always fresh through the years. He is always seen exchanging niceties with lovely ladies. You can call him a socialite whore as he has made acquaintances with every person, be it male or female worth his time and scheme.

15. Vionne/Yvonne.

They insist that they don’t share a name whatsoever and if you call one the others name she gets so furious! She is a diva in her own territory. She is very passionate about her interests and relationships. She is a free spirit who loves music and dancing!

16. Nick.

He is rare too. Loves women, straight up! He is however an endless puzzle that you have to keep solving everyday if he’s going be your friend or lover. He is full of energy and will not rest at anything or anyone especially when he got his eyes on something or someone for that matter. He likes work done good. He is an extrovert but deep down he is in touch with his feelings so to speak. He cherishes females and wants to eventually do right, question is will he ever?

17. Melissa.

She is disguised as the sweet girl next door but she is just another typical headache. One of those drama queens who will act up for no reason. She doesn’t just talk but calculates when to talk. So she is not a snob but a schemer! She is a spoilt brat, always used to getting whatever she wants. Be careful not to fall into Mellisa’s trap as she is good at enslaving guys. However, there are isolated cases of a sincere and nice Mellissa.

18. Sly.

As her name or his name suggests is a sly. They will work for whatever they want till they gets it, not because they really wanted it but most times just to prove a point; that they could get it. They love to compete, bet and gamble. Sly is however a very generous person, they are also good listeners. If this lot doesnt revolutionize they might end up being Crises from Chris 🙂

19. Shiro & Shiko.

I put them together because they are side kicks. Always wanting to be seen together, always aiming at competing with each other and the rest of the girls too. They are however, beautiful and if tamed can be very useful individuals as they are fast to learn and apply. Most often than not, they end up in bitch slapping dramas if not  something of the sort for some strange reason. This is the order of their lives, as they are your typical dare devils!

20. Anto/ Tony.

He is the talk on every girl’s mouth. Whether it’s because his name is popular or because his personality is; is debatable. He aspires to be James, he cleans up very nicely but sometimes fails at vibing the honeys so he will just go ahead and nail as many as possible because hey, he is popular! Every girl wants a piece of him.

21. Judy.

She is a very intelligent and interesting girl. She is full of life and expectations. She is not easily lead a stray. She however thrives to maintain her image. Given a chance she’d want to be a Shiro for one day! She is a good friend as she listens and gives good advice.

22. Dan/marcus/Mark/Nathan/ Justin

They have very similar personalities and traits, it’s frightening! First and foremost, they are charming and most times keep their mouths shut. They are extremely talented in arts, we are talking talent and the gift of appreciation. They could take forever to express their emotions, well … at least verbally. They would take a life time to admit to any woman that they had a crush or were in love. This reservation of feelings when accumulated makes them culminate to become individuals who find pleasure in others misery for craving to have them. Did i make any sense?

23. Esther.

Just like the one in the bible, she is a strong woman who believes in prayer and meditation. She will persevere through all her problems and eventually have a testimony to make. She falls deeply in love with just one man. This could be a dangerous trait as she doesnt let go off easily. She is a keeper once you find her. That is about it with her.

24. Andrew.

Loves to shower gifts and most times he is well off. Andrew’s flaw is that he cherishes gifts too much sometimes he forgets to be a lover. At the end of the day, the relationship breaks down because of insufficient communication! He is however, the guy you should cling on to as he is ambitious and will be rich, well if he aint’ already because he works his ass off to earn his cash. Andrew runs out of vibe at some point and becomes so plain boring, good thing his money complements him! Or lets just say that his money will find you happiness. Like we all love two slices of bread so does he love women 🙂

25. George.

He is ambitious and a generally focused fellow. He works hard to earn his paper. Georgy also has one helluva sense of humour! You will always want be close to him just to share the fun. However, he is fears emotions. He is afraid of commitments, always wants to be free like a bird. When George finally settles down, he is a great family man but always puts his job first! In bed, he is the sporty type even though deep down he has that malicious need to break a heart. George’s last trait is his innovative mind as he always comes up with innovative ideas!

Part 2 coming soon …