What Maternity Leave Is Really Like

First of all, the best piece of advice you can ever give a pregnant lady, is invest in numerous pairs of really comfy and cute pyjamas. Because let me tell you, you wont be getting dressed for a good couple of weeks, and even months in you'll still spend 90% of your days in your pyjamas. I'd advise a few pairs because when the baby is sick on them (every day) you've got a fresh pair on hand, it also comes in handy for when guests come round and you're not in the same pair they saw you in last time. Pyjamas become wearable anywhere. Picking up the other half from work? Pyjamas will do. Nipping to the shop for emergency nappies? Pyjamas will do?

I couldn't wait to have Noah, get ourselves suited and booted in the car and head off to the Zoo, the Aquarium, the Beach, oh the possibilities were endless. Oh how naive. It sounds harsh, but babies don't care for any of that. They can't appreciate the colourful fish, enjoy the sunshine on the beach or even be fascinated by the animals at the Zoo, no matter how much we want them to, they just really aren't bothered. They're more likely to be extremely irritated that you're confining them to their pushchair for so long and would prefer to eat their toes. And at the age where they can start to appreciate it, is the time when you have to head back to work.

3pm is a perfectly acceptable time to venture out for the first time that day. It's usually because you started getting ready at 11am, you've had a poo explosion, a sick, a whole outfit change and then as you're above to put them in their car seat, they're fast asleep and you dare not wake them because you've had about 18 minutes peace in the last month so you're going to savour that moment. Taking a baby out takes planning, team work and lots of preparation.

At least one day out of the week you will be waiting for daddy and almost rugby ball pass your baby to him as he walks through the door. We all have those days, and they're bloody hard work!

Even the same week you've popped your baby out you will be asked on average 8.493 times, if you're 'Going back to work?'. I'm not really sure why it's anyone's business but be prepared with an answer because they'll be expecting one outright.

Money, money, money. Maternity pay is no great fortune let me tell you that. And the further into maternity pay you get, the less and less it amounts too. It's such a hard choice, go back to work early and have more money? Or stay at home longer and have a lot less. It's shit, but we all face that dilemma at some point.

                                                 (Noah looking how I've felt on a few days)


  1. Love this post! So honest and true haha xx

  2. Noah's adorable! Great post, very funny & true! haha