Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Our National Religion(s)







Yrsa - Wednesday


  1. Yrsa - It is interesting that Christians and Jews have not taken a serious look at the average 13 or 14 year old and acknowledged that, as this is the crowd that can't decide who their friends are from day to day, they are no exactly ready for major life decisions. How can they make a decision about their "adult" commitment to their faith when they are so far from being adults?

    In the Catholic Church, the age to receive Confirmation has changed from time to time. I was confirmed when I was 12; my kids were confirmed when they were 15. I was involved in the Confirmation program when my kids were going through the process and we had a meeting with an old nun who had been dealing with teenagers for more than sixty years. She told us that when dealing with teenagers it is important to remember that the brain and the body cannot grow at the same time. When the body is changing so rapidly and drastically, the brain goes to sleep. We pin our hopes on the belief that when the body stops growing, the brain will awake refreshed and assume its proper role. Anyone who has spent any time with this group knows the description is accurate. So why do we pretend they actually know what they are doing? All the kids I know see the Confirmation party as a celebration because they don't have to go to religious education classes anymore.

    In light of that, I think no one should be confirmed until they are 35 and really know what it is they are doing. That same belief leads me to conclude that no one should get married before they are 35 either (especially my kids).

    I took my son for a haircut the day before we were to attend the Bar Mitzvah of one of his friends. We met the Bar Mitzvah boy and his father and the boys got into an animated discussion about whatever was the big deal 12 years ago. They were lost in their own world, making faces and creating sound effects. The father turned to me and said, "Look, a man."

    When the average life expectancy was 35 years, it may have made sense to consider children of 13 or 14 as entering adulthood. Now there are people who are 35 who still haven't grown up.

    I have dealt with some boys who would think jumping from a tree with sticks woven into their skin would be "cool".

    I hope you have a wonderful Easter and that everything regarding the Confirmation will go off without a problem.


  2. Hi Beth and thanks for your great input, the nun and the bar-mitzvah boy's father hit the nail on the head and I also agree with your 35 year old grown up limit, here kids can vote at 18 and this has not proven very successful for example, not many people know anything about anything at 18. It makes no sense to be too young to be trysted with alchohol but be allowed to ahve a say in running the show.

    May you (and your children) also have a wonderful Easter.

    bye Yrsa