Saturday, 30 January 2010

A new species

The sun shone on the light dusting of snow this morning and as Tracey had been superwoman yesterday doing everything on account she married a wimp who hurt himself lifting a paint brush over his head, said wimp decided to let sleeping beauty lie in while he set about the smallholding morning routine, his good mood buoyed up by the fantastic winter morning. Even the antics of goats could not wipe a smile from wimps face as he knew their replacement was being visited later on, Hetty the Dexter Cow. This is her, closest to the camera with her mum and her little sister calf stood watching.

The goats were a smallholders compromise we made, thinking small animal, small amount of milk in return for bed and board, rather than a large animal like a cow, large amounts of food and buckets of milk that we could not use. There was also half a plan to have the billy kids accommodated in MrWhirlpool next to the pigs, deer and poultry that already rest in pieces. The lambs have so far been spared this fate on account they are so small, so cute, usually missing when a decision is made that it is time for the chop (over the hills and far away) or cunningly having been medicated thus rendering them safe from human consumption for 56 days. Bitter experience with goats has led to a lack of vegetables, a vandalised tomato house, a leaking roof, damaged cars and bruises whenever any attempt was made to extract milk from them. Having thoroughly outstayed their welcome they are in the exit lounge until some mug, er... keen amateur wants to take them on.

Hetty on the other hand will be a different challenge, and never one to shy away from challenges Tracey has been volunteered to tame the beast and train it so it can provide the inhabitants of Rock HQ with assorted dairy products. All being well Hetty will pass her TB test which will mean that we can move her here. The plan at the moment is that she will live the life of luxury chomping on hay and other cow goodies before being introduced to the bull. This will then lead to Hetty Mk2 being born, like in the picture at the top, how cute is that calf.

Once Hetty Mk2 is here we will then have milk, half of which the calf will drink, but as the milk yield is around 1.5 to 2.5 gallons of moo juice a day there should be sufficient for all here. She will also produce around two gallons of pooh a day, quite what we are going to do with this additional resource has yet to be decided. Hetty Mk2 will be for beef, no matter how cute it is, and so this little Dexter is a welcome new species at Rock HQ. They are a very docile breed and most usefully, considering the terrain and weather here, very hardy. A cow bell is top of the list of must have accessories, just in case the horns don't work.

Speaking of which she doesn't look the docile and friendly type in this picture, she looks more like paw the ground, snort, charge and gore you to death type. I also have my suspicions as to why Tracey insisted on buying me a red cape.

No comments: