Monday, January 26, 2009

Sometimes you just have to laugh it off

I'd like to thank my dear friend Alyson for sending me a Ms. Swan link today. Some days I would love nothing better than to fly home and never think about Asia again. Today has been one of those days.

That's why it made my day to watch clips of Ms. Swan from Mad TV. It provides a little insight to the frustration Aaron and I deal with occasionally.

Below is her at a fast food restaurant. We feel the man's pain even though the roles are usually reversed in our case.

Thanks again Al. I miss you so much!

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Holy Lucky Mole Hair!

(This image was borrowed from Matt Auld on Flickr because I'm too much of a chicken to take one myself.)

Here's something to make you involuntarily dry heave in public.
Apparently, Singaporeans (I think specifically the Chinese ones) think that moles are very lucky. And if you can grow a really long hair out of one, then you've really hit the jackpot. In this case, they grow them as long as physically possible. The cutting or plucking of these hairs will "cut" your luck or take it away completely.
So you will see them all over the country with these extremely long plaits growing off the unsightly moles on their necks, faces and so on.
I try very hard to respect the culture and appreciate it from their point of view. However, this is one that I just cannot grasp.
Do they know that these "lucky" moles are also the source of skin cancer for many people? I wouldn't consider that a lucky part of my body.
I'd like to introduce them to my friends named "fate" and "predetermined destiny"...and hand them some tweezers. Luck schmuck people. Groom yourselves.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Say it in Singlish

Singlish: Can lah.
How Megan and Aaron must translate: Yes, I can do that for you.

Singlish: Cannot.
How Megan and Aaron must translate: No, that's not possible.

Singlish: The room looks homely.
How Megan and Aaron must translate: The room looks home-y. (No, they're not calling it ugly. That's their British word for cozy.)

Singlish: Take-away o' having here?
How Megan and Aaron must translate: Would you like that to-go or dine-in?

Singlish: Please queue here.
How Megan and Aaron must translate: The line starts here. (You learn this quick. There is a line to do EVERYTHING in this country. There's usually a line just to get from one part of the MRT station to the other. I'm not even joking.)

Singlish: 4D's
How Megan and Aaron must translate: Tickets in the Singaporean lottery. This made for an awkward conversation for Aaron as he thought Simon was always talking about getting a "forty" ouncer of beer after work everyday. Simon had a good laugh.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Ohhhh Yes We Did!

In honor of the inauguration of our 44th president, Aaron and I donned our Obama t-shirts. The shirts were a gift from PC1 Johnson upon his return from Detroit a couple of weeks ago.

I heart my shirt. I wear it often. The Singaporeans love Obama too. There are many many parties throughout the country celebrating his 1st day in office. We're staying home though. It's a school night.
So here's my cutesy shirt:
And here's Aaron's:
His is a little more "in your face" than mine. He's wearing it today, but that's probably it. The back is what makes him uncomfortable.

He's positive that we're not part of the "We" that did it. I've tried to convince him that as voters we are, but he's not sure that that's what it means.

Whatever. We love Obama.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Guinness is driving me crazy

and for once, it's not his fault (or so we think.)

Guinness is balding. I know the technical term is shedding, but seriously. This has reached such a shedding status of epic proportions, it needs a new name.

This is a picture of what our little swiffer thingy picks up after only two days. TWO DAYS!!!! And in only one room of the house. You can imagine what the rest of the house looks like.

This has gone on for about three weeks now. We have to sweep every two days. I'm surprised the little punk has any fur left at all.

We cannot figure what the heck is wrong with him. He's also chewing the fur off as quickly as he's scratching it off.

We ruled out several ideas: It can't be allergies because Singapore has no seasons. It can't be lead poisoning cuz he hasn't been near the lead paint in a month. It can't be mange because it only affects the lower half of his body.

So desperate times called for desperate measures.

Now the conehead is having a gay old time ramming that hard plastic helmet into the backs of our legs.

Your days are numbered you barely furry friend.

Monday, January 12, 2009

Why the locals only wear sandals

Today was a traumatic day for Aaron. I'm not sure he'll ever be able to put his shoes on the same way again.

His day started out innocently enough. He got up just in time to get showered, dressed, and be on his way to work. A typical Aaron day.

However, not long after he put on his work boots, he noticed that the lining must have been bunched up in his one shoe. This was not unusual as he needs to replace these worn out boots anyway. He tried wiggling it smooth with his toes. He tried shaking the loose lining back to the right spot, but that just seemed to make the problem travel to his heel. Then he gave up and decided that it'd probably work itself out soon enough. When he got to work he continued to try to ignore the issue, but it was really starting to hurt his foot.

So he sat down at his desk and removed the problem shoe. And this is what fell out:

Yep, it's a gecko. A dead one at that. We're pretty sure Aaron killed it with his foot. Whether it was the crushing effect that killed it or the smell-- is still under investigation. You may notice that his tail has been severed as well. It was a gruesome scene at the Navy Post Office.

Aaron's still a little shaken up.