Sunday, April 17, 2016

Marketing Lies That Need to Die No.2: Spreadable Butter

Lurpak Spreadable. Probably the closest I've found.
It does spread, but it definitely doesn't taste
 like regular Lurpak. I.e.: Buttery Heaven.
Now I admit that this topic is a lot less black and white than the last one about targeted pain relief, but it's one that still annoys the hell out of me as a customer.

Has anyone ever actually bought a 'Spreadable Butter' that spreads on regular bread? As I don't recall ever finding one. Note that I'm not talking about margarine type spreads or 'butter-like' brands, but those that claim to be both butter and spreadable, usually a mix of butter and vegetable oil. They don't always 'say' butter, but they are clearly positioned as being almost butter, rather than in-betweens.

There are many which spread, but they don't taste like butter - and there are many which taste like butter, and they don't spread.

Brand variants called 'Buttersoft' or 'Spreadable' seem to exist for every single brand. The question I have to ask is, what in the name of all that is edible are they spreading this stuff on to get away with those claims?!

Seems like all of these brands are caught in this grey area where you can't have both butter taste and spreadable texture. So we end up with no clear way of knowing how soft or actually spreadable something is until you buy it.

The process normally goes like this:

  • Buy 'spreadable' labelled butter.
  • Put out bread slice.
  • Attempt to spread.
  • Tear bread to pieces.
  • Put new piece of bread out.
  • Attempt to carefully spread butter.
  • Tear bread to pieces.
  • Swear.
  • Put new piece of bread out.
  • Dump chunk of butter onto bread and put in the grill to melt it.
  • Spread butter on half toasted bread.

Maybe I just have a shit knife, but I am so fed up of products being labelled spreadable when they clearly clearly are not.

This lie needs to die, or at the very least get much much clearer!

Thursday, April 14, 2016

Marketing Lies That Need to Die No.1: Targeted Pain Relief

Pink for ladies? How original!
Image Source: ACCC
I'm sure you've all seen them. Variants of pain relief products that claim to target a particular type of pain, usually migraines, back pains or period pains - but which contain exactly the same ingredients as the regular pain killer.

Now maybe you could argue that they provide placebo relief, though I'm not sure that would make a great proof point for a campaign... but what really makes these products a complete pain in the arse is how much more they charge for them.

You can buy generic pain relievers for very little money, and branded pain relievers for a bit more money - but targeted pain relievers, well they cost a bit more. Except, rather like homeopathy, you aren't really paying for anything other than a new run of packaging, and for this privilege you can sometimes be charged TWICE the price of the regular branded version.

For years these products have annoyed the hell out of me, providing absolutely no proof that they do what they claim to do. Finally though, someone has been doing something about it.

"Where can we get these Placebos?!
Maybe they're in that truck!"
The ACCC (Australian Competition and Consumer Commission) has been pursuing action against Nurofen* and Reckitt Benckiser* for their range of these painkillers, and not only have they forced the range to be taken off shelves, but customers now may be able to get their money back.

This is excellent, because I for one am so sick of marketing that lies. In this age, we have to be truthful if we want to succeed. Yes we need to be clever, write well and look great, but the essential things we say have to be based on reality - and the simple fact is that these products were absolutely not.

Well done to the ACCC for helping marketing and brands take a step towards real honesty. After all, it's the brands that really suffer in the end. I wonder how many customers Nurofen have lost because they felt so ripped off by a false claim? Given that the real positive features of some of the range (E.g.: Faster absorption) are actually good. But why would anyone want to pay a premium in the future for a brand that lies to them, and rips them off in the process?

Hopefully this is the last we EVER see of this lie.

*I should add, Nurofen are by no means the only brand I've seen doing this practice. I recall seeing other brands by different healthcare companies doing the same thing back in the UK.