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To be mortified at how my mum behaved

(186 Posts)
tbear2O19 Tue 02-Apr-19 15:30:20

Mum takes me shopping once a month as currently I can't drive.
So not to drip feed, yes I do use online deliveries and sometimes swing by the supermarket myself but with 3 young ones it can be handy and luxurious to go alone!

Anyway we went to the self service check out that has the big conveyer belt thing. One item needed assistance, then she started packing. Putting her bags down on the weight bit (where you put your shopping after it's scanned, these bags hadn't been scanned)

So by the time the assistant has cleared the item, we need further help as the bags have made it require help iyswim. I said to my mum "you're going to need to unpack all that as it doesn't recognise the bags" she simply said "oh well fucking forget it. What the fuck what a fucking waste of time"
And.... left blush

I have no money to pay for her items, I did offer to put the items back but the assistant said no it's ok. I am mortified, I'm still red!! And to make it worse she just drove home, didn't even wait for me.
So had to walk home with 6 bags of shopping.

I'm just mortified!

CoraPirbright Tue 02-Apr-19 15:32:51

...........^didn't even wait for me.^
So had to walk home with 6 bags of shopping.

What the hell?? Does she have form for this? How horrible of her! It’s not your fault she put her bags in the wrong area and caused the confusion!!

VictoriaBun Tue 02-Apr-19 15:33:14

shock I've never heard my mum say duck - ever !

Thunderwing Tue 02-Apr-19 15:34:46

Is this out of character for your mum? It sounds like an extreme reaction to something relatively trivial.

Have you spoken to her since?

tbear2O19 Tue 02-Apr-19 15:34:47

6 bags isn't the end of the world, I'm sure people on here managed with 8 and a toddler on their back grin but it was the humiliation of it all!
She has form for getting pissed off if things don't go her way but never to this extent

EmeraldShamrock Tue 02-Apr-19 15:35:41

Oh dear, I can't blame you, I would be mortified too.
You are not in charge of your DM, or can't change her behaviour.
You were kind to the shop assistant, I am sure she thought you are lovely, that is what matters.
Is DM usually short tempered, I would be more annoyed she left you there, unless she has a good reason for her outburst.

VladmirsPoutine Tue 02-Apr-19 15:36:49

What set her off? That sounds an extreme reaction to nothing very consequential. Wow!.

Thunderwing Tue 02-Apr-19 15:37:02

I would have been embarrassed in that situation too!

You say 6 bags isn't the end of the world, but you probably bought heavier stuff knowing you where getting the car home (that's what I would've done certainly!).

She owes you an apology.

TroysMammy Tue 02-Apr-19 15:37:08

She's bang out of order. I wouldn't contact her and definitely not go shopping with her again.

I have heard my DM saying fuck once in her 70's she was referring to my DDad, her DH, as he had once again driven her around the bend.

Thunderwing Tue 02-Apr-19 15:37:35

were getting

Stayawayfromitsmouth Tue 02-Apr-19 15:37:39

Is she feeling alright? If this is out of character I would wonder if she has had upsetting news. If it's not out of character she's probably trying to tell you she's sick of taking you shopping.
Hope you get to the bottom of it.

TheGrey1houndSpeaks Tue 02-Apr-19 15:40:46

Oh wow! I wouldn’t go out in public with her again, tbh. That’s godawful behaviour. Does she ever rant like that in front of your kids?

CSIblonde Tue 02-Apr-19 15:40:48

Poor you OP. If she has form for having a short fuse, is something bothering her, is she happy generally? Small stuff like that can be the last straw & tip you over the edge if you're struggling with something big like depression, money, work stuff, marital stuff etc etc.

tbear2O19 Tue 02-Apr-19 15:41:18

I did have heavier stuff, hence not really pushing the matter of putting "D"m shopping away, I'd have nowhere to put mine but was only a basket full but still wasn't the assistant job and I'm so annoyed she done it!!

I don't think she's sick of taking me shopping. We have an incredibly odd relationship and I see her about once a month. Usually we go get our hair done then for afternoon tea or early lunch then shopping. Then she'll spend an hour at mine while I make a cup of tea for her and she sees the grandchildren so it's usually quite a pleasant trip out

OneStepSideways Tue 02-Apr-19 15:41:18

Has she ever done anything like this before?

tbear2O19 Tue 02-Apr-19 15:42:21

She did get sacked last month but she's been off work since November so not sure why that was a surprise but that could have been bothering her I suppose.
Nothing like this before around me at all

thatdisorganisedmum Tue 02-Apr-19 15:43:48

that is very... odd
and immature to say the least.

OP you sound like a really nice and reasonable person despite her!

I hope your own mum is not bothered about taking you shopping once a month shock, but you can always ask.

gamerchick Tue 02-Apr-19 15:44:08

Well I'd be certainly giving the shopping trip a swerve from now on OP. You can't pull shit like that.

tbear2O19 Tue 02-Apr-19 15:48:08

She is incredibly immature 🙈
Yes I'm not sure I want our day out next month to happen now!! No idea what the heck caused this, I'm not long home so haven't had a chance to speak to her.. do i even want to? I feel like I have nothing to say to her sad

Samind Tue 02-Apr-19 15:50:53

I would leave contact until you feel like you've properly calmed down internally. I would be mortified if mine done this. Maybe something is bothering her though that she's not brought up. (isn't your fault though) is she worried about income since having lost her job?

TheOrigRightsofwomen Tue 02-Apr-19 15:51:02

IME that's the behaviour of someone who has a very, very short fuse for some reason and the bloody annoying self checkout was the straw that broke the camel's back.

When I was going through a very difficult time, I remember joking with a friend that there should be a sign at the self-checkout suggesting that people who are short on patience or otherwise not in a good way don't use them.

She should apologise to you.

Drum2018 Tue 02-Apr-19 15:51:03

I can't believe she left you there. I'd be letting her make the first move to contact you and wouldn't bother going shopping again unless she can give some explanation as to what got into her. How bizarre.

gamerchick Tue 02-Apr-19 15:51:18

You don't have to speak to her. Balls in her court for contact imo.

MinisterforCheekyFuckery Tue 02-Apr-19 15:52:19

Unless she has form for sweary outbursts in public over trivial things then I'd be more concerned than angry I think.

GreenEggsHamandChips Tue 02-Apr-19 15:53:54

Do you know why she was off work and why she was sacked? Could she have actually been rather ill

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