How long can you live without a cell phone?

Sweet, sweet cell phone
Sweet, sweet cell phone

Imagine you are in Lawrence, Kansas. Imagine you are using a public restroom. Imagine you like to read on your phone while in restrooms. Now imagine you put your phone down, leave the bathroom without it, and by the time you remember to retrieve it, it is gone!

What would your first reaction be? Mine was to mutter the word “mother” followed by another word that starts with an “f” and ends with a “ucker.”

How could I be so stupid? I blame my parents. It’s their genes that made me, and chances are they dropped me at least once on my head as a kid. Couple that with at least three known concussions, binge drinking at times, and other stuff I guess it’s pretty easy to answer the question that began this paragraph.

But enough of me. What I am interested in knowing is, “How long can one live without a cell phone?”

Losing a cell phone is kind of like losing your identity. Think of what’s on your cell phone.
1. Phone numbers that you clearly have not memorized, and therefore you will probably not be able to get in touch with 90% of your contacts.
2. Photos. Some of which may or may not allow you to ever run for office because they are now public. And since not everyone backs these up, those memories will eventually vanish when your memory goes.
3. Some people even store important personal data on their phones.

Now that there are no pay phones, you actually have to converse with other humans and ask them to borrow their phone to make a call. Imagine that. And even if you find a pay phone, I’m pretty sure the police are immediately called in to question what you are doing because using a pay phone is just about the shadiest looking thing you can do these days.

And how do you get anywhere? Use a map? Ha! Or, stop at a gas station and ask for directions? Oh, the humanity.

And what about getting on line? Especially if you are traveling. Apparently, there are still public libraries and you can go to them.

The funny thing is, I wouldn’t mind doing any of these things. It might do the world good if we had to interact more, use maps, or even go the library.

However, it wasn’t ten minutes after I realized my phone was gone forever that I called Verizon and ordered a new one. I didn’t get it for about three days and even for a non high-tech, fairly simple person like myself, three days was just about enough.

How long do you think you could last?