Sunday, 28 June 2020

8 Things not to say to someone who is dealing with anxiety.

Hey readers,

As an individual who suffers from anxiety for a number of years, I have had my fair share of experiences involving people saying things to me that is not really helpful when you're trying to deal with anxiety.

So here is my 10 popular comments people have said that should not be said to someone who is suffering from anxiety.

1. Trendy.

Social media is a great tool in raising awareness of mental health. The downside is that some people may not be genuine in saying they have a mental health condition. 

They may say they have mental health issues to help with social media engagement or as an excuse for behaviour. Sadly the genuine people who suffer from anxiety get tarnished with the same brush.  

I know people use Google to self-diagnosis and in some cases the may be genuine. It is OK to talk about anxiety because how else are we going to raise awareness.

I think most people who say they suffer from anxiety are genuine suffers but sadly only takes a bad apple to affect a community. I didn't talk about my mental health for a long time to anyone or the odd person who I trusted.

 It takes a lot of courage for people who genuinely suffer from mental health. Trust me I do not see it as trendy. It is an ongoing battle and something if I could wave a magic wand make it disappear.

Sadly I can't make my anxiety vanish away and therefore have to focus on managing it rather than focus on a way of getting rid of it. 

I still get feelings at times of being ashamed if I am honest maybe because of past experiences of people turning a blind eye or not willing to talk about it has had an influence on me.

I am learning like everyone that talking helps and if you do suffer from mental health conditions then do be afraid of speaking up snout how it affects you.

2. Get over it. 

The amount of times I have been told to simply just get over it is unreal. Yeah sure mate I'll just click my fingers and get over it. It takes a lot of hard work to manage anxiety and you don't really know what is going on so don't assume that someone can just get over it!

3. Everything will be fine.

I know when people say this they mean it with good intention. However, anxiety is a devious little bugger and can really make you believe what you are feeling is real. Sometimes just listening to the anxieties helps a lot more helpful to say.

4. Calm down.

There is nothing more infuriating than someone telling you to calm down when you're in the grips of anxiety. 

It almost feels like when someone says calm down like they are not taking your feelings seriously. If anything saying calm down just triggers me and makes me angry which is not good either.

5. It's all in your head.

Of course, it is in my head, anxiety occurs in the mind right? One thing is for sure it is real, though some of the thoughts are maybe questionable in regards to the truth in relation to how the anxiety makes me feel.

6. Your such a weirdo.

There is nothing more encouraging than someone knocking you for suffering from anxiety. Just because it is different from the way you think or act does not make it OK calling someone a weirdo.

7. Have a drink you will feel better.

OK having a drink can be a relaxant however, we all know too much alcohol is a depressant. If drinking alcohol becomes a regular coping mechanism for dealing with anxiety it can actually hinder your mental health. 

Once the effects of feeling relaxed and letting go wear off alcohol tend to cause more anxiety which defeats the point anyway.

8. Other people are suffering much worse conditions then you are. 

This does not really help to compare a person to another person. We are all different and on our own journeys. Comments like this make you feel rubbish and reduce the likelihood of wanting to talk to you again about how you feel.

Have you experienced any of these observations? Love to hear your thoughts in the comment section down below.

Cheers for reading X

Navigating Baby


  1. Some people need to think before speaking. I think someone saying calm down is the worst. Easy for them to say. x

  2. It's hard to believe that anybody would even say these things, but I know they do. It's good to educate people, sometimes they just don't realise how much worse they are making things.

  3. I'm probably one of the guilty ones that might say 'everything will be fine"! I'll have to start thinking before I speak next time! #KCACOLS

  4. Calm down is just the worst thing! But I do often think that people are just trying to be nice. It just doesn't help, does it? #KCACOLS

  5. Yes the last one is a bad one alright. It belittles the way you are feeling and I agree makes you less inclined to open up and talk about your feelings in future. Definitely not helpful at all. #KCACOLS

  6. it's really sad but i've had most of those too in the past. People who haven't lived with anxiety or mental health probs just don't have a clue. Sometimes I just want people to sit and listen. not judge. Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope you come back again next time!

  7. I suffer from anxiety and have said all of these to myself! We need to accept and value emotions and feelings. Thanks for linking up with #dremateamlinky

  8. Great points! I have had anxiety my whole life and it is such a time drain. It makes me annoyed!! I especially liked the point about alcohol as I know when my anxiety is bad even one glass of wine makes it worse so if I feel the anxiety bubbling I never have a drink until its back under control #DreamTeamLinky