Moonfall Looks Like Roland Emmerich’s Loudest, Dumbest Disaster Movie Yet

Moonfall Looks Like Roland Emmerich’s Loudest, Dumbest Disaster Movie Yet
Hurry, darling! We must outrun... the moon! (Screenshot: Lionsgate)

Some men just want to watch the world burn. Or tear itself to pieces. Or explode several million times. One of those men is director Roland Emmerich, whose career mainly consists of disaster movies both large (Independence Day, 2012, The Day After Tomorrow) and small (Midway, White House Down, the godawful 1998 U.S. Godzilla movie). But his biggest disaster ever — literally and likely figuratively — is coming soon, and it’s titled Moonfall.

In which the moon, as you might have suspected, falls. On Earth. Please, behold this trailer in all of its WTF glory:

The moon sure does make a mess of Earth in a lot of unique and potentially contradictory ways! But Moonfall isn’t just about the moon falling on your heads. Note the elaborate space station seen in the trailer, and then read the film’s official summary:

“In Moonfall, a mysterious force knocks the moon from its orbit around Earth and sends it hurtling on a collision course with life as we know it. With mere weeks before impact and the world on the brink of annihilation, NASA executive and former astronaut Jo Fowler (Academy Award-winner Halle Berry) is convinced she has the key to saving us all — but only one astronaut from her past, Brian Harper (Patrick Wilson, Midway) and conspiracy theorist K.C. Houseman (John Bradley, Game of Thrones) believe her. These unlikely heroes will mount an impossible last-ditch mission into space, leaving behind everyone they love, only to find out that our moon is not what we think it is.”

This movie is clearly an Armageddon rip-off with raised (and enlarged) stakes, but between the summary and some of the trailer’s weirder shots — like Patrick Wilson staring at either a space ghost boy or a younger version of himself? — it seems like Emmerich might be trying to put an Arrival/Interstellar spin on the film, which should prove to be outstandingly goofy.

If I sound overly negative about the movie… you’re hearing me clearly. Roland Emmerich is a less talented Michael Bay. Other than his beloved Independence Day, his films are stinkers. However, Moonfall looks so ridiculous it may hit that same Independence Day sweet spot, where the stupidity and cacophony manage to be entertaining instead of annoying.

Either way, I’m going to call it here and now: despite the leeway science fiction usually gets, I predict Moonfall will be the most scientifically inaccurate movie ever made. I feel extremely confident about this, mainly because of how large Emmerich believes the moon is:

Screenshot: LionsgateScreenshot: Lionsgate

Moonfall, which also stars Michael Peña, Charlie Plummer, Kelly Yu, Eme Ikwuakor, Carolina Bartczak, and Donald Sutherland, premieres on February 4, 2022. I can’t wait.