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Don't Look Now

Episode Info | Pictures
Typed By: CowBob RanchPants

(The episode starts off with SpongeBob and Patrick at the Reef as they're getting popcorn. Squidward approaches them drinking a beverage.)
SpongeBob: Hi Squidward. Bet you can't guess what movie we're going to see. (Squidward just keeps sipping his drink.) That's okay, I'll tell you. It's Fisher- (Squidward motions for him to wait a minute.)
Squidward: (sighs in bliss) You may speak.
SpongeBob: Patrick and I are going to see Fisherman 4.
Squidward: Ha, you two won't sleep a wink tonight if you see that movie.
SpongeBob: Squidward, you are looking at two very grown-up big boys.
Patrick: Yeah nothing can scare us. (They start walking off.)
Squidward: Boo. (SpongeBob and Patrick yell and run off as Squidward laughs. They stop running and SpongeBob clears his throat.)
SpongeBob: We'll show Squidward, we're not afraid of any old movie.
(SpongeBob and Patrick walk inside the movie room as the lights go out.)
SpongeBob and Patrick: Woah!
Patrick: We're lost.
SpongeBob: I wish we had a flash light.
(Suddenly a light from an anglerfish employee shines on them.)
Anglerfish: Take your seats.
(They both scream and jump into two chairs.)
SpongeBob: Gee thank you sir. Ooh the movie's starting.
(The preview on the screen shows that the movie is rates S for scary. They show the movie's logo and then lightning strikes after it. SpongeBob and Patrick scream but a lady behind them shushes them.)
SpongeBob: Sorry. (On screen there are kids on a playground. Two of them are titter tottering.) Oh this isn't too scary. (Above the two children, we see a boat with a hook in the water.) The Fisherman's hook! Get off the titter totter!
Patrick: You fools.
Kid #1: Ahahaha!
(The kid on screen gets his mouth hooked as SpongeBob and Patrick yell again.)
SpongeBob: The Fisherman's got
Patrick: And he'll fry them into fish sticks. I can't watch. Is the scary part over?
SpongeBob: Uh hold on I'll take a peak.
(On screen there's a couple on a bench.)
Guy Fish: Thank you for meeting me Edweena at midnight.
SpongeBob: Patrick it's okay.
Patrick: You sure? Aaaah! It's worse, they're kissing.
Guy fish: I love you Suzy.
Girl fish: It's Jennifer.
Guy fish: I'll never leave you Jennifer. (He gets hooked in the pants and gets dragged up to the sky.) Good bye Margret!
SpongeBob and Patrick: The Fisherman!
(They throw their popcorn in the air and it lands on some of the audience. The audience gets upset at them.)
SpongeBob: Sorry, sorry, sorry sorry!
(They pick up their popcorn bins and turn their attention to the movie again. Not more than a second in and they yell again.)
French narrator: Two hours later.
(Both of them are hiding between their chairs.)
Patrick: See if it's safe.
(SpongeBob peeks his head out to a screen that says the end.)
SpongeBob: Aw the movie's over.
(Patrick peeks out too.)
Patrick: Aw dang, we hardly even saw it.
SpongeBob: Well we'll watch it again and this time all the way through.
(A screen of bubbles fast forwards the scene.)
SpongeBob: Okay keep your eyes open.
Patrick: No problem.
(Two kids in movie are walking.)
Boy #1: I love eating ice cream.
SpongeBob: Patrick I'm getting scared. Hold my eyelids open.
Patrick: I'm on it. (Patrick hoists himself behind a row of chairs and does just that.)
SpongeBob: Doooh!
(Boy #1's ice cream gets taken by the hook.)
Boy #1: Hey my ice cream. Nooohohohoo! (sobs) It was rocky road!
SpongeBob: Must..close..eyes..too scary..
Patrick: Ah I can't hold your eyelids, they're too slippery.
(Patrick looses his grip on them and slams them into SpongeBob with his hands inside. Patrick and SpongeBob groan in pain. Outside we see a janitor sweeping who hears the yells but keeps on doing his job. Back inside, SpongeBob and Patrick are cuddling each other in protection. SpongeBob looks at the "the end" sign on the screen.)
SpongeBob: Aw, we missed the movie.
Patrick: What? Not again.
SpongeBob: It's okay we'll just see the next one.
Anglerfish: I'm afraid not, that was the last showing.
SpongeBob: Wow uhwha- what time is it?
Anglerfish: It is one minute to midnight.
SpongeBob: One minute.. to midnight?!
Patrick: But that's when The Fisherman comes out!
(They hustle out of the room.)
SpongeBob: Come on Patrick, we gotta get home.
SpongeBob and Patrick: Aaaah! The Fisherman!
(It was really just a poster of the movie. They keep yelling and running until they see a clock tower chime. A little wooden Fisherman comes out of it and hooks in a fish.)
SpongeBob and Patrick: It's midnight, The Fisherman!
(They run to SpongeBob's pineapple and stop to breathe a bit.)
SpongeBob: Phew, we made it.
Patrick: I guess we showed that old horror movie who's boss.
SpongeBob: Yeah we looked fear right in the face.. and avoided direct eye contact with it.
Patrick: It's like we're heroes.
SpongeBob: Okay Patrick sleep tight, I'll see you tomorrow.
Patrick: Wait a second. You mean I have to walk all the way home alone?
SpongeBob: No, no you don't. I'm going to walk you to your door.
(SpongeBob holds Patrick's hand as they made it there.)
Patrick: Darn old horror movie, why couldn't we watch a cartoon instead?
Patrick: Do you hear that?
(There's a ship like sound.)
SpongeBob: I think it's coming from over there.
(The scene shifts to a foggy area with a shadow coming out of it.)
Both: It's The Fisherman!
(They scream and hide behind Patrick's rock. The figure comes closer, but it's a man with a mask on a bike.)
SpongeBob: Oh it's just Slasher McGee. Okay, I guess I'll just go home now. It's right over there. (He tries to go, but has trouble.) Just a few steps that way... in the dark... all alone. (gulp)
Patrick: Okay, come on now. Don't be all ascared, I'll walk you home.
(They walk back to SpongeBob's.)
SpongeBob: Oh thanks old pal, but then who's going to walk you home?
Patrick: Let's just cross that bridge when we burn it.
(There's a dark shadow over them and they look into the moonlit sky what seems to be The Fisherman.)
Both: The Fisherman! (They scream and fall down. The supposed Fisherman was really just a swarm of jellyfish. We cut to Squidward sleeping in his bed. He hears SpongeBob and Patrick outside and gets upset. The two keep yelling and freaking out.)
Squidward: What is wrong with you?!
(They jump into the air and into Squidward's windows above.)
SpongeBob: Oh, hey Squidward.
Squidward: What are you blockheads up to? Don't you know it's after midnight? Get down here.
Patrick: We can't get home.
SpongeBob: We're too scared. (The scene changes to Squidward carrying both of them. Patrick on his back and SpongeBob on his head.) (sighs in relief) Thank you Squidward you are a true friend.
(Squidward throws Patrick in his rock.)
Patrick: Thanks Squidwar-
(Squidward slams the rock down.)
SpongeBob: Yeah thanks Squidward I don't think we would have ever gotten home without you.
Squidward: Hat.
SpongeBob: Oh yeah here. (He hands it to him and Squidward lunges SpongeBob into his mail slot. SpongeBob flies into bed wearing only a night cap, shoes and underwear.)
Squidward: I told those mutton heads not to see that movie.
SpongeBob: (from his own house) Patrick are you okay?
Patrick: (from his) Yeah are you okay?
SpongeBob: I think so, g'night.
Patrick: Yeah g'night, just don't think about The Fisherman.
SpongeBob: Oh no I will not think about The Fisherman. Sleep tight.
Squidward: Oh The Fisherman, The Fisherman. Blah blah blah. They want a Fisherman eh? I'll give them a Fisherman and how.
(He goes into his closet and looks through his stuff.)
Squidward: (He pulls out a Dracula costume.) No. (Then a Frankenstein.) No. (Then a bunny costume.) Um, no. (He finally gets to a Fisherman like outfit.) Aha. (Lightning strikes as Squidward appears to be outside near the moon light now.) It's time for those lame brains to meet the real Fisherman. (Lightning strikes twice more as Squidward prepared his hook.) This is going to be good. (laughs)
(He casts out his hook towards Patrick's rock and scrapes on it. Patrick peeks out of his rock half asleep.)
Patrick: Uh hello? Someone there? (The hook goes into one of his nostrils.) Uh huh? What that? What heh, it's something stuck um huh. (The hook jags him.) Oh wait a second, oh yeah that's the spot. A little to the left... oh yeah, alright. Right there. Ahahaha.
Squidward: Hahaha, gotcha! (He yanks the fishing rod up with Patrick on it.)
Patrick: The Fisherman! Aaaah!
(Squidward's rod runs out of line.)
Squidward: Maybe this wasn't such a good idea...
(Squidward is pulled by Patrick and chases Pat with his boat. Patrick shouts as Squidward laughs evilly. Patrick rips open SpongeBob's door and closes it behind him. There's a knock on the door from laughing Squidward and Patrick yells once more. Patrick's face is tore off, leaving him able to run to SpongeBob's bedroom. It's completely dark in there.)
Patrick: SpongeBob! SpongeBob wake up, he's here!
SpongeBob: Who's here? Hold on let me turn on the-oh your face! (Patrick's bone face is revealed.)
Patrick: Oh (Patrick puts another face on.) there.
SpongeBob: Now who's here?
Patrick: Oh someone's here?
SpongeBob: You just said.
Patrick: Oh yeah uh, The Fisherman's here.
SpongeBob: The Fisherman!
(Patrick says some gibberish and they both scream as usual.)
SpongeBob: Ah The Fisherman's here!
(Outside the pineapple, Squidward is listening in on them.)
Squidward: Hahaha! Listen to those nonicks, what a couple of hopeless babies. I really should stop, but I'm having too much fun. (He opens the door.) Heh, it's almost too easy.
SpongeBob: Quick bind the door! (He pushes the bed against the bedroom door. Squidward is coming upstairs.)
Squidward: There's just no sport to it.
(They have all the bedroom's stuff piled up.)
SpongeBob: Is that everything?
Patrick: What about this?
SpongeBob: Not Gary.
(They see the door handle jerk and SpongeBob places Gary on the pile of stuff anyways. They back away slowly.)
SpongeBob: Do you think it'll hold?
Patrick: I sure hope so.
(Squidward comes behind them in the window, laughing creepily. They scream as Squidward opens it.)
Patrick: Maybe if we don't look at it it will go away?
SpongeBob: Oh yeah just like the movie.
(They close their eyes but open them again to see him gone. But they look behind them and see him there.)
Squidward: I'm the deadly Fisherman.
(Both of them scream.)
SpongeBob: Well I guess this is the end old buddy.
Patrick: I don't want to die in my underwear.
SpongeBob: Here (He rips them off.) die in mine.
Patrick: Hey good idea. (rips off as well) Let's trade. (They switch.)
Patrick: Here you go.
SpongeBob: And here you go. Where were we? Oh yeah.
Both: Aaah! He's going to turn us into fish sticks!
(Squidward laughs so hard he pops out of his costume. Both of them yell in terror of this.)
SpongeBob: That thing's eating Squidward.
Patrick: Not out bestest buddy, we gotta save him. Okay plate 33, I need you to go along. And... break! You're going down Fisherman.
Squidward: (laughs) Huh? (Patrick head butts into his gut, causing Squidward's head to pop out. SpongeBob bites down on Squidward's neck as Patrick pummels his body.)
SpongeBob: Don't worry Squidward, we'll get you out of that old monster. (SpongeBob tries to walk away with Squidward's head.) Let's escape through the window.
(Squidward gets thrown out the window with SpongeBob and his body follows him. Patrick throws the bed and other heavy stuff on top of him.)
SpongeBob: Okay I think you've got it.
(A toaster hits Squidward's noggin and soon after paramedics come to drag him away. Squidward mumbles as SpongeBob and Patrick are next to him.)
SpongeBob: Shh shh, no need to thank us. We were only doing what any good friends would do for their bestest buddy. Well I guess we don't have to worry about that old monster anymore.
(The Fisherman costume comes to life and roars.)
Squidward: Huh?
(Yelling SpongeBob and Patrick push Squidward into the ambulance and ride off. The costume falls off and it's Gary who was inside.)
Gary: Meow.
(He goes to sleep inside it.)