2020-07-04 19:32:00 (UTC)


I can't help but feel that I'm constantly under surveillance here. There seems to be no way I can write freely and without care, at least when it comes to certain topics. It was all fine when I was writing with only the use of pronouns but certain letters of the alphabet seem to be a trigger.

Well, whatever.

My notebook diary is almost full so I started looking into the option of having a bullet journal next. My therapist gave me a few exercises to practice daily so such a thing would be included there. I can track my mood, my writing, even how often I cut. Maybe once I see how many times a week it happens it would be more encouraging to stop. I was also advised to get back to physical exercise but going to the gym isn't safe still. Instead I've been waking up at 6 am and taking a walk through the entire town. It's empty and quiet during those hours, to my convenience. It's safer too, considering the shootings that's been happening. I doubt hitmen for the mafia do their killing THAT early. So yeah, bullet journals *thumbs up*

I'm not on any medication but some days everything feels numb and irritating. I guess today is one of those days.

Johnny, we're a long way from creative.

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