TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact

After watching an episode of Chef’s Table, Alexandra Dash was inspired to venture into the culinary world of the Italian crowd pleaser, risotto.

Despite her good intentions, she is tonight deeply regretting her decision to make the time-consuming rice dish a mere 3 minutes into cooking.

The Advocate reached out to Alexandra, who was more than happy to talk to someone while standing alone in her kitchen, constantly stirring and adding liquid to the risotto.

“I don’t know how this dish has survived for so long,” she said.

“It’s the most time-consuming thing ever.”

“It’s probably not even going to taste that good, fuck!”

It’s believed Ms. Dash is making a truffle and mushroom risotto after her and her partner, Phil, went truffle hunting at a farm on the outskirts of Betoota.

“You wouldn’t think Betoota would be good for truffles but it’s actually perfect” explained Tim Fungai, the truffle farm’s manager.

“There’s a small pocket out here that kind of has its own ecosystem, it really defies all we know about weather patterns”

At the time of press, Alexandra still had at least another 30 minutes of stirring to do.

It’s believed the risotto will almost certainly not end up being worth the effort.

More to come.