CI/TST: update exception message, xfail
hmm this is failing the 32-bit build  (though likley to pass all others) ive got some troubleshooting to do here.  if you're starved for things to review, #39454 #39453 #39446 are collectively blockers for reshape bugs/refactor, #39508 #39502 #39495 are test improvements, and #38992 is a blocker for fleshing out tests.  #39163 is not at all trivial, but i think will lead to appreciably simpler code once it goes in. > ive got some troubleshooting to do here. if you're starved for things to review, #39454 #39453 #39446 are collectively blockers for reshape bugs/refactor, #39508 #39502 #39495 are test improvements, and #38992 is a blocker for fleshing out tests. #39163 is not at all trivial, but i think will lead to appreciably simpler code once it goes in.

heheh, will look. more trying to have a green CI  :-> green, booyah nice! @meeseeksdev backport 1.2.x