WIP/TST: troubleshoot xfails
- [ ] closes #xxxx
- [ ] tests added / passed
- [ ] Ensure all linting tests pass, see [here](https://pandas.pydata.org/pandas-docs/dev/development/contributing_codebase.html#pre-commit) for how to run them
- [ ] whatsnew entry

pls rebase will keep rebasing, but i don't expect this to be mergeable any time soon one more rebase pls > one more rebase pls

will keep rebasing, but pls dont merge; even once green i want to re-run a handful of times to try to catch flaky failures got it can u change the title to WIP or make a draft prob should rebase this status here? > status here?

The OK-looking changes i've been breaking off into the TODO/FIXME PRs.  Mostly hoping to keep running until the pytest-timeout catches something useful.