 to say thank you for the week.
A tribute to something that meant a lot to me.
It was one of the most heartfelt moments for me of 2020.
Our identity becomes tied up in what seems like the smallest, most trivial of things (like wearing a suit). When we then go through a time where our routines, aspirations, and usual mode of operating are disrupted, it’s natural to start questioning who we actually are.
In some ways, you have to put yourself back together, but in a different configuration.
In some ways, it’s a total reinvention.
In some ways, it’s a beautiful amalgamation of the old and new.
All of this requires ‘unlearning’, a crucial component of adapting yourself to a new world. The term is overused, but it does still have some utility, despite its vagueness.
It might be easier to think of the process of unlearning not as the removing of certain patterns of thinking and being, but rather as a modification of choice.
So, it’s not uninstalling software, but rather coding a new response. This also feels more like a process that supports speed and adaptation.
1. Your beliefs, actions, and thoughts are in response to the world that you are living in. Based on your experiences you have created your own internal operating system.
2. You then re-enact those beliefs, thoughts, and actions whenever you encounter the appropriate trigger. For example, you see your friend’s success on Instagram and instinctively scold yourself for not being as successful. Or someone does something wrong in your eyes and you explode.
3. Modification of the response (unlearning) would mean that you become aware of this pattern and moving forward intentionally set out to choose a new response.
4. With enough repetition you create new beliefs, thoughts, and actions.
As you would expect, this is also the process through which you condition new behaviour and ways of thinking.
Choosing a better response also means learning new responses.
Our library of responses is mostly filled with things that used to work in the old world. These are things that we are familiar with and that will lead us down a predictable path. Adding new responses to the library requires us to learn new things.
For example, someone sits down with you because they have a serious issue they are trying to navigate. Your default response is to give them advice based on your own experiences. However, had you learnt how to coach someone the conversation might unfold differently and more effectively.
However, simply coaching someone is not available to you until you have acquired a certain mindset and set of skills. Learning new responses generates endless possibilities of dealing with familiar (and new) situations.
Fortunately, it seems that in times of uncertainty we crave learning. It’s most likely because our inadequate responses are so glaringly obvious to us. Unfortunately, craving learning does not automatically translate into sufficient learning.
In 2021, I am declaring a war on ineffective learning.
The world is rife with pseudo-learning. We have new information available in every conceivable format. From 15 second TikToks to hour long videos on YouTube.
1. We feel like there is always more to discover. So, we consume and consume without ever translating it into behaviour.
2. Easy come, easy go. People don’t value free content in the same way as they do paid content.
3. The platforms that deliver quality education also deliver quality distractions.
So, what happens is that we confuse consumption with learning.
We should always be learning new things in the sense that we use the feedback from the world around us to modify the things that we do. For example, through experimentation you will quickly learn the best time to go to gym so that it’s not too busy, or when the best time to book a flight is, or what you can do to help you sleep better.
Let’s call this Evaluative learning – you evaluate the consequences of your actions and decisions and iterate based on them.
A second type of learning is Constructive learning. This is when you attempt to learn a specific skill or mental model so that you can further your position in life.  When I started playing golf, I constructed not only new skills but also a new element of my identity.
These two types of learning should be used in conjunction. Both require you to be intentional. Both require you to have a hyper awareness of your own limitations and strengths.
Constructive learning is identifying that you want to be a better remote leader. You then find the right resources, identify the necessary skills, and enrol in a course to help you improve. There is an end goal that you can visualise.
You then set out to demonstrate what you are learning. You evaluate your own behaviour and the effectiveness of the changes that you are making and also ask for feedback from those who are on your team.
You bring this information back into the Constructive state and use it to further construct your ideal self as a remote leader.
Evaluative learning is something that you are hopefully naturally engaging in as you go about your life. It’s the process of iteration that lies at the heart of high-performance.
However, it might be beneficial to go for quality over quantity when it comes to Constructive learning. The process of developing yourself is not easy. It takes time to ingrain new routines, habits, and ways of thinking and being.
Trying to change too many things about yourself is likely to lead to frustration and poor results. I have often suggested to clients that you choose one new behaviour or area of interest to dive deeper into every quarter.
This focuses the mind (and your intentions) on one specific area of improvement and allows for an easier flow between Constructive and Evaluative learning.
What is the quickest and best route to a meaningful life and to accelerate personal and professional development?
To embrace the obstacles on your path.
There are so many entry points to personal development. To follow one’s passions. To work on one’s weaknesses. To further develop one’s strengths.
But I passionately believe that in doing the work required to overcome the challenges in your life, you are engaging in the most direct and effective manner of self-development.
If you decide to climb Mount Everest, the tallest mountain in the world, you will no doubt go through a strenuous process of preparing for the climb. You will exercise your body and prepare your mind. So, before you have even stepped a foot on the mountain, you are already stronger, fitter, and more mentally prepared.
The real test of course arrives when you start your ascent to the top. You will encounter the harshest of conditions, battle your mind, and push your body to the limits. Every step of the way you learn something new about yourself.
But, perhaps, the greatest gift of finally arriving at the summit of the mountain is that you now know that you are the kind of person that conquers mountains.
The challenges that you are facing in life embody a certain duality. It’s both the force that will prevent you from living your full potential, as well as the force that enables you to live your full potential.
By rising to the occasion, you become better. By striving to become a formidable contender your will is strengthened, and your skills sharpened. Do you see how this makes you a little more Dangerous in every area of your life?
Below are six leadership trends that I’ll be following closely in 2021. Admittedly I have a bias towards trends around personal and professional development.
It should come as no surprise that there is a continued and intensified focus on people’s wellbeing – both physical and mental. Wellbeing was already an important trend entering 2020, with 80% of respondents citing it as a priority in the Deloitte Global Human Capital Trends study.
It’s the prerogative of leaders to not only provide a structure and framework, but to demonstrate it too. We often talk about how we should maintain boundaries between our professional and personal lives, but then we still send Slack or Whatsapp messages at 9pm at night.
Leaders should be clear on what wellbeing looks like. It’s a vague enough term that it could induce paralysis because we don’t know where to start.
According to a survey of 2 000+ members done by the Society for Human Resource Management, two in three employers say that the maintenance of employee morale is a challenge.
One major benefit of the remote working trend is that everyone has become more comfortable with technology as a medium for communication and learning. This provides an opportunity to engage people in learning beyond the traditional workshop or the boring static online courses.
In fact, this probably becomes more important because we start missing out on the natural occurrences of mentorship and coaching that used to happen at the office. This is further fuelled by uncertainty, which creates a craving for learning.
Organizations must be more intentional than before about the development of their people.
AI powered coaching through tools such as LeadX and Butterfly.ai.
According to the 2021 Deloitte Global Human Capital Trends survey, the ability for people to adapt, reskill, and assume new roles is the top ranked item when executives were asked how they would navigate an uncertain future.
As mentioned earlier in this manual, I firmly believe that many people engage in a form of pseudo learning and that most learning is ineffective and rarely translates into behaviour changes or improved skill.
Apart from the ability to deliver learning programs at scale, organizations must figure out how to improve the effectiveness of such programs.
We have no idea what the future of remote work brings. However, it’s quite possible that in the long run it leads to lower engagement and employees emotionally detaching from organizations.
The proliferation of tools designed to track remote employee behaviour has been staggering