Dating | Greggornation
For parents, ‘the talk’ may need a reboot Leave a comment
By Sarah White, Special for USA TODAY
Since Jan. 1, California 12-year-olds can get prevention services for sexually transmitted diseases — including the HPV vaccine, hepatitis B vaccine and HIV post-exposure medications — without parental consent. California joins a handful of states with STD-prevention language in their minor-consent laws, including Iowa, Kansas, Maryland, Montana, North Carolina, South Dakota and Washington, D.C.
The key to STD prevention is catching kids before they have sex, which is by ninth grade for nearly one-third of teenagers, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reports.
Right now, minors in all states can be diagnosed and treated for STDs without a parent’s involvement.
Tips for parents about discussing sex
•Use the teen’s daily life. Whether it’s a Twilight story line or a pregnant classmate, the sexual behaviors around your teen provide great conversation starters, says Carol Ford, chief of adolescent medicine at the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia. “Ask your teen, ‘What’s your take on that?’ when they’re talking about something happening to their friend” to gauge how your teen sees things and help teens shape their own views.
•Talk early and often. “Plant the idea that you will listen in a non-threatening way, which builds trust,” says Abigail English, director of the Center for Adolescent Health & the Law. If teens can’t ask you for help, send them to an aunt, grandparent or friend’s mother.
•Be “askable.” Teens are more likely to talk when they feel they won’t be judged, says Claire Brindis, professor of pediatrics at the University of California-San Francisco. Try leaving pamphlets on contraception or STDs lying around and asking your teen what he or she thinks.
•Don’t be alarmed. Parents might be upset to see an STD vaccination listed on a health insurance explanation of benefits. But remember, those vaccines are for prevention and do not mean your teen has actually had sex.
Posted January 19, 2012 by sotpyouth in Dating, Family
This isn’t the first time we’ve seen Glee address the subject of teenagers losing their virginity. In the 15th episode of Season One, an episode titled “The Power of Madonna,” Glee introduced the same scenario when three couples faced the decision to lose their virginity (the episode was watched by 12.98 million American viewers and was critically acclaimed). After a dream sequence performance of Madonna’s Like a Virgin, two of these teenagers took the plunge and “went all the way” (Finn and Santana), while others didn’t (Rachel, for example). Read the rest of this entry »
How to prevent teenagers from sexting and protect them from other teens who do Leave a comment
With the ubiquity of ever more powerful cell phones, sexting has become an increasing concern for the parents of teenagers and preteens. This article describes how you can protect your child from the dangers of sexting, an activity that has major implications for long-term online reputation and electronic privacy.
Sexting refers to sharing nude or near nude pictures, usually via a mobile phone. Most experts distinguish between sending naked photos, an activity with serious privacy, health and legal implications, and simply sending suggestive text messages, which is less harmful.
Understand why teenagers engage in sexting. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted November 9, 2011 by sotpyouth in Dating, General, Media
16 and Well Adjusted Leave a comment
Here is a humorous parody on MTV’s hit show “16 and Pregnant”
What’s it like when you’re the only girl in school who’s NOT pregnant?
Posted September 15, 2011 by sotpyouth in Dating, School
What Can We Do About Dating Violence? Leave a comment
Unfortunately, there is no easy answer to what we can do about dating violence.
The first step, though, is to realize that it does happen, and it can happen to your child.
It is important to understand that the more you try to pry your child away from the situation, the more she or he will run to it.
Nothing will happen until your child realizes on their own that the abuse she or he is facing is not love. That can come from flyers, magazines, websites etc. Why not find a couple of flyers with a hotline on them and leave them lying around? What about leaving the name of a website around? Here are a few that I find are extremely focused on helping your child:
From Liz Clairborne(click on the image): LoveIsRespect.org is probably my favorite site to give to people about teen dating violence. A young person can come across this site and learn what abuse is, what you can do if you are being abused, even what can you do if you are an abuser. Please use this site. It is simply there to help your child.
Another one from Liz Clairborne, but for parents –
This one is good to help kids respond to bullying, violence, text harassment etc:
Please use these if you need to. Pass them on to your kids. Pass them on to your neighbors and friends. Remember that violence and bullying happen.
Posted June 8, 2011 by sotpyouth in Dating, Family, Main, School
11 Facts about Dating Abuse Leave a comment
A Letter to Parents on Teen Dating Abuse from Pediatrician & Expert, Dr. Elizabeth Miller 1 comment
A LETTER TO PARENTS ON TEEN DATING ABUSE FROM PEDIATRICIAN & EXPERT, DR. ELIZABETH MILLER
Dear Parents/Guardians/Educators,
As a physician who specializes in care for adolescents, a researcher on teen dating abuse, and a parent of a teen, I am often asked by other parents to talk about the warning signs of dating abuse, what parents should be looking for, and how they can help their child navigate out of an unhealthy relationship. Unfortunately, there are no easy answers to these questions.
A COMMON CHARACTERISTIC
A common characteristic of unhealthy and abusive relationships is the control that the abusive partner seeks to maintain in the relationship. This includes telling someone what to wear, where they can go, who they can hang out with, calling them names, humiliating them in front of others. Over time, the isolation from one’s social network increases, as the abuser insists on spending time “just the two of us,” and threatens to leave or cause harm if things do not go the way they want, “You must not love me.” Creating this isolation and dissolution of one’s social supports (loss of friends, disconnectedness from family) are hallmarks of controlling behaviors. In addition, abusers often monitor cell phones and emails, and for example, may threaten harm if the response to a text message is not instant. Parents are rarely aware of such controlling tactics as these occur insidiously over time, and an adolescent may themselves not recognize the controlling, possessive behaviors as unhealthy. “They must love me because they just want to spend time with me.”
While the following non-specific warning signs could indicate other concerning things such as depression or drug use, these should also raise a red flag for parents and adult caregivers about the possibility of an unhealthy relationship: Read the rest of this entry »
Posted May 17, 2011 by sotpyouth in Dating
The Ups and Downs of Teen Romances (Re-Post) Leave a comment
I feel this is an important article that needs re-posting:
What’s Really Going On With Significant Others?
An article from David R. Smith
Girls get a manicure and pedicure. Guys get a haircut and call up a friend to brag about who they’re going out with that night. These are just a few of the things teenagers do before the date.
But what are they doing during the date?
Ahhhhh, dating…the complicated and awkward attempt of putting one’s best foot forward, with the hopes of fooling another into thinking life can’t continue without them. As stressful and as tedious as dating usually is, plenty of teens still do it. A report entitled “Kiss and Tell,” published by The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned PregnancyM, found that seven in ten teens say that most of their friends are in romantic relationships.
That’s a lot of dating!
Parents and youth workers have long-recognized that teenagers can experience tremendous highs and desperate lows when it comes to dating. When the Facebook profile changes from “single” to “in a relationship,” the words of Charles Dickens have never been truer: “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.”
Let’s go ahead and get the bad news out of the way. Not everything is roses and candy in teenage romantic relationships these days.
In the Kiss and Tell report, researchers found that 17% of teens say they don’t know anyone who serves as an example of a healthy relationship. As unfortunate as that is, the results of that reality are far worse. It becomes little wonder why researchers have been documenting unsettling findings in the areas of sex, pregnancy, and even violence, as it relates to teen dating.
One of the things we know teenagers are doing on dates is having sex. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted May 15, 2011 by sotpyouth in Dating, Family