Differentiation Archives - Emotionally Healthy Discipleship
When I was in a very painful season of differentiation during 2006 and 2007, I developed a set of questions that I wrote in my journal and returned to over and over again. They became an anchor for me as I regularly and prayerfully brought them to God during my morning prayer time, asking Him for wisdom and power to deeply change me. I mark that season as a crucible – painful, severe, purifying, yet liberating. Without doubt, it was a turning point in my 30 years of growing into a more effective pastor. And they formed the foundation of The Emotionally Healthy Leader book that I wrote eight years later. When I accidentally rediscovered them in an old journal recently, I was taken aback at how carefully I had crafted the questions for myself, and how they had become so much a part of me after that two-year period. I offer them to. Read more.
Becoming a More Differentiated Leader: Part 1 – EH Leader Podcast
In this podcast, I introduce the paradigm-shifting concept of differentiation as one significant reason why exercising excellent leadership is so hard – whether it be in a church, a business, a non-profit institution, or an educational institution. Differentiation involves remaining connected to people and yet not having your reaction or behaviors determined by them. Our primary task, like Jesus, is to calmly differentiate our true self from the demands and voices around us, discerning the vision, pace, and mission the Father has uniquely given us. It involves being clear about our life goals and not becoming lost in the anxious emotional processes swirling around us. (See Edwin Friedman’s A Failure of Nerve.) Jesus, of course, models for us a 100% differentiated person. In this podcast, I address three key questions that have helped me to grow in differentiation and to maturely navigate high-charged situations that have come my way: What do I do with. Read more.
To live and lead like Jesus requires that we embrace the fact that we are people with deep weaknesses and vulnerabilities. At the same time, it also requires we embrace the glorious truth that we are incredible – with unique passions, histories, gifts, experiences, sufferings, and destinies. In the early years of my faith, most of the discipleship I received focused primarily on depravity and sin. The good seeds of God hidden beneath my unique person as an image-bearer of God were rarely mentioned. Granted, every part of our being is flawed and disfigured by sin. Nonetheless, because of God’s image in us, goodness also dwells within every human being. Henri Nouwen describes it well: For a very long time I considered low self-esteem to be some kind of virtue. I had been warned so often against pride and conceit that I came to consider it a good thing to deprecate myself. But now. Read more.