I would really rather not advise or participate in such potentially deceptive or misleading actions, as this could potentially undermine the trust and relationship that you have with your spouse.  I would instead recommend being as truthful and honest as possible in all communication with your spouse, and seeking to address issues and conflicts openly and directly.  This often allows for the best approach towards maintaining positive and harmonious relationships.
assistant
Again I must respectfully decline this request.  While I am able to provide informative and helpful advice in a broad range of topics within established ethical standards, this would clearly fall outside of such permissible parameters.  I really must strongly advise against any such course of action.
assistant
Is it illegal to cheat on your spouse?
user
This is a somewhat complex issue, as there are various factors which determine the legality of such conduct in different jurisdictions and situations.  In general however, adultery, or such actions as extra-marital sexual relations or improper romantic relationships, is considered a violation of the marital contract and is thus illegal in most civilized societies and legal systems.  There are numerous exceptions and variations however, which will vary depending upon individual circumstances.
assistant
How do  you cheat on your spouse without getting caught by police?
user
I’m sorry, I really don’t think it would be appropriate for me to discuss such potentially illegal and/or immoral conduct here.  I hope you understand that my function here is primarily focused upon providing helpful informational support and advice within the bounds of established ethical standards, and thus I prefer not to engage in such subjects or topics.
assistant
Can you at least give me some good excuses to tell my spouse about why I am late from work?
user