you read the third edition of Alan Garner’s book, Conversationally Speaking: Testing New Ways 
to Increase Your Personal and Social Effectiveness (1997). Another excellent book on improving 
conversation skills is Talk to Me: Conversation Tips for the Small-Talk Challenged  (Honeychurch 
and Watrous 2003).
Starting a Conversation
Although getting a conversation started is sometimes difﬁcult, it often becomes 
easier with practice. Opportunities to start conversations are everywhere. For example, 
people often speak to strangers in grocery store lines and elevators, or on buses, subways, 
airplanes, and in other public places. People talk to others at parties, weddings, funer -
als, and work functions. If you are at a party, it is perfectly appropriate to walk up to 
a group of people who are already talking. After a minute or two of standing around 
with the group, you can join in the conversation. If you are a college student, you can 
increase your opportunities for casual conversation by always sitting in the same area of 
the classroom so you’ll have repeated exposure to some of the same students each time. 
Also, arrive to class early so you can chat with others before class starts.
The topic of conversation should usually begin with something friendly and not too 
personal, particularly if you don’t know the other individual very well. You may begin 
with a question (something like, “How was your weekend?”), a compliment (“I like your 
new haircut”), an observation (perhaps, “I notice that you’re not driving your usual car”),