The Shyness & Social Anxiety Workbook
160The Aftermath of Exposure: Processing What Happened
Chances are that you will feel good following your exposure practices. Although 
you may be tired, you likely will also feel relieved to have completed the practice and 
proud of your accomplishments. Nevertheless, some people tend to analyze their every 
move and criticize their performances during the practice (for example, “People surely 
noticed my anxiety,” “I came across like a bumbling idiot”). If you tend to dwell on what 
happened during your practices, we suggest that you try to put a more positive spin on 
the experience.
Remember that the main reason you are practicing exposure is to eventually  feel 
more comfortable in social and performance situations. However, for now, expect to 
feel uncomfortable during practices. Expect that your performance won’t be perfect (in 
fact, the goal isn’t perfection anyway). Rather than dwelling on what happened or didn’t 
happen, try to use the cognitive techniques from chapter 6 to challenge your negative 
thinking. Also, try to take something positive from the experience. Even if things didn’t 
go the way you had hoped they would, you can still use the experience to plan future 
practices and to generate ideas for what you might do differently the next time.
A WORD TO SIGNIFICANT OTHERS, FRIENDS, 
AND FAMILY MEMBERS
If you are reading this book in order to help a loved one, here are a few suggestions to 
keep in mind. First, your loved one must be on board with this treatment. Treatment is 
not something that can be forced on someone who isn’t willing to make the necessary 
changes. In addition, you should avoid the temptation to trick, force, bribe, or coerce