to reread the relevant sections of this book and resume using some of the strategies that 
you found helpful the ﬁrst time around.
Encountering a New and Unexpectedly Difﬁcult Situation
Although you may think you have overcome a particular fear, it is possible that some 
fear remains but that you just haven’t had a chance to encounter a sufﬁciently challeng -
ing situation until now. One of our clients was recently surprised to experience intense 
fear while unexpectedly having to give a toast at his father’s birthday party. He had 
worked very hard to overcome his fear of public speaking at work. After a few months 
of practice, he found he could speak comfortably in meetings, and he even gave long 
presentations to groups of 200 or more with almost no fear. One day, he was asked on 
the spur of the moment to make a toast at his father’s birthday party to about thirty 
friends and relatives whom he had known his whole life. This made him very nervous. 
Although he had successfully overcome his fear of speaking in formal work situations, 
he had never had the opportunity to speak in an informal and personal situation like a 
family party. For him, giving a toast in front of friends and relatives was actually a new 
situation that he hadn’t had the chance to practice previously.