Changing Your Anxious Thoughts and Expectations
125Therapist:   Would it mean that you really are pathetic and stupid?
Aimee:   I suppose not.
Therapist:    Would it mean that all other people also think you are stupid and 
pathetic?
Aimee:   Not really.
Therapist:   Why not?
Aimee:    Well, his opinion doesn’t reﬂect that of other people. I know my friends 
don’t think I’m pathetic. At least I hope not.
Therapist:   If you’re not stupid or pathetic, why else would he reject you?
Aimee:    Perhaps he might have other lunch plans. Or, maybe he already has a 
girlfriend.
Therapist:    Those are both possibilities, but let’s come back to your original thoughts. 
What if he really thinks you’re pathetic and that’s why he isn’t interested in 
spending time with you?
Aimee:    I guess it wouldn’t matter. Over the past few weeks, I’ve come to recognize 
that not everyone has to like me. Perhaps it would mean that we’re just not 
a good match.
Therapist:    If he declines your offer for lunch, do you think you will be able to cope 
with the feelings of rejection?
Aimee:    I think so. It will feel bad at ﬁrst, but I think I can stop myself from getting 
too down on myself.
Overcoming catastrophic thinking also involves combating the tendencies to con -
centrate only on the immediate consequences of some negative experience (for example, 
“People will think badly about me during my presentation”) and to forget that your 
discomfort will pass after a short time. In reality, the consequences of making a mistake