126interpersonal effectiveness Handout 5   (p. 2 of 2)
(Stay) 
 M indfulKeep your focus ON  YOUR  GOALS .  
Maintain your position. Don’t be distracted. Don’t get off the topic.
“Broken record”: Keep asking, saying no, or expressing your opinion over and over and over. 
Just keep replaying the same thing again and again.
Ignore attacks: If another person attacks, threatens, or tries to change the subject,  
ignore the threats, comments, or attempts to divert you.  
Do not respond to attacks. Ignore distractions.  
Just keep making your point.
“I would still like a call.”Appear  confident Appear EFFECTIVE  and competent.
Use a confident voice tone and physical manner;  
make good eye contact.No stammering, whispering, staring at the floor, retreating.No saying, “I’m not sure,” etc.
Negotiate Be willing to GIVE TO GET .  
Offer and ask for other solutions to the problem.  
Reduce your request.  
Say no, but offer to do something else or to solve the problem another way. 
Focus on what will work.
“How about if you text me when you think you might be late?”
Turn the tables: Turn the problem over to the other person.  
Ask for other solutions.
“What do you think we should do? . . . I can’t just stop worrying about 
you [or I’m not willing to].”
Other ideas: