Perhaps you feel lonely because you don’t feel confident in your social skills. Practice social skills such as smiling at other people, giving compliments, and making conversation with people you meet throughout the day (grocery clerk, barista, co-workers).  If you’re in a new situation, reach out to someone else and start a conversation. Say “I’ve never been here before, have you? What’s it like?” Either the person can help you or you can find comfort in doing something new together. Remember to communicate openness through body language. By hunching your shoulders, looking down, avoiding eye contact and crossing your body, you appear unapproachable. Smile, keep your posture open (uncross your legs or arms), lean in, and  face the person who is speaking. Look for things to affirm in others. Don’t just compliment someone’s appearance ("I like your sweater"), but instead say "You always take the time to put together just the right accessories." If you know someone well enough, compliment them on their kindness or intelligence. Learn more ways to improve your social skills more by checking out How to Improve Social Skills. Interacting with other people isn’t just about knowing the right thing to say. Hone your listening skills by giving your full attention to the person speaking. Don’t try and plan the perfect response or wait to find your entry point; this puts the focus on you and not the person speaking. Instead, encourage the person to keep talking and show interest in what is being said.  Non-verbally communicate your listening skills by nodding your head, making eye contact, and giving small feedback like saying, “I see,” or, “uh huh.”  For more tips on how to build listening skills, check out How to Be a Good Listener. Find people with whom you have common interests and with whom you can get along. Ask questions to get to know someone (ask about family, pets, interests, etc.), and make sure people want to get to know you back by asking questions of you.  Meet people by volunteering. If you love animals, volunteer at an animal sanctuary or an animal shelter. You’re bound to meet other people who love animals and you have something immediately connecting you. Find common interest groups in your community. If you are interested in knitting, chances are there are people around you that also share that interest. Do a little internet research and find a group that you can join. Want more information on how to make friends?  Check out How to Make Friends. It’s important to have solid friendships in the town where you live. Friendships help boost your mood, reduce stress, and give you lifelong support. Look for friends that you trust, are loyal, and encourage you. And make sure you live out the values you look for in a friend, too, by being a trusting, loyal, and encouraging person to the friends in your life.  Be genuine. if you cannot "be yourself’ around your friends, chances are they are not your friends. Friends will appreciate you for you, quirks and all. If you struggle to connect with one person or feel like you are trying too hard, move on and make a new friend. Practice being the friend you want to have. Think about the qualities you want in a friend, and do those things for the people in your life. Adopting a dog or cat (or other pet) from an animal shelter can mean major health benefits for you, especially companionship. Humans that have dogs tend to have lower levels of depression, are able to cope with stress better, and show lower levels of anxiety.  Go to the local animal shelter and help to socialize a dog or cat that has lost their family and is alone. If you are able, you may wish to adopt a dog. Of course, adopting a dog is a big responsibility. Make sure you can adjust your schedule around a new pet in order to give your pet a loving and fulfilling life. Sometimes the pain of loneliness can take a toll and make it difficult to move forward on your own. A therapist can help you work through social anxiety, understand past feelings of betrayal and distrust, improve your social skills, and offer support in moving forward. Reaching out to a therapist can be an empowering first step in committing to the life you want for yourself. For more information, check out How to Choose a Therapist.
ابنِّ مهاراتك الاجتماعية. كن مستمعًا جيدًا. قابل الناس في مجتمعك. اصنع صداقات جيدة. تبنِّ حيوان أليف. اشترك في العلاج النفسي.