Research has consistently shown that people need to push themselves beyond their comfort zones to perform at their best. This is called embracing “optimal anxiety.” It turns out that the more you’re willing to challenge yourself, the more comfortable you will become with new experiences.  It can be terrifying to take risks because we’re generally not comfortable with the idea of failure. Most people are afraid of risk in the short-term. However, people who don’t take risks and push themselves are more likely to regret not doing so later in life.  Getting out of your comfort zone occasionally can also help you develop the flexibility you need to deal with life’s unexpected roadblocks.  Start small and work your way up. Go to a restaurant without checking it out on Yelp first. Take an impromptu road trip with a loved one. Try something at work that you haven’t done before. Set  attainable goals according to your abilities and talents. Consider each effort to be an attainment. Achieve one step before the other towards stability and security.  Set goals that are meaningful to you, and don’t compare them to anyone else’s. If a personally meaningful goal is to learn to play your favorite song on the guitar, don’t feel bad if you don’t become a rockstar guitarist. Keep your goals performance-based. Achieving your goals takes hard work, dedication, and motivation. However, you need to make sure that you can achieve your goals through your effort -- remember, you can’t control anyone else. For example, “Become a movie star” is a goal that relies on others’ actions (casting agents have to cast you, people have to go to your movies, etc.). However, “Audition for as many movies as I can” is achievable because you control that action. Even if you never get a part, you can view your goal as a success, because you accomplished what you set out to do, which was work for what you want. When you live life to the fullest, you take chances. You go after what you want. You make decisions that have consequences. And sometimes, these things don’t go the way you’d hoped. Embracing vulnerability, the possibility that things will go differently than we had planned, is crucial to experiencing life in a full, open, honest way.  Vulnerability helps you take actions in all areas of your life. If you’re afraid of being open and honest with another person because you might get hurt, you won’t be able to develop a truly intimate relationship. If you’re afraid of taking a chance because it might not work out, you may miss out on opportunities. For example, consider the example of Myshkin Ingawale, an inventor who wanted to develop technology to help reduce the child death rate in rural India. Ingawale frequently talks about how he failed the first 32 times he tried to create this invention. Only on the 33rd time was he finally successful. That willingness to be vulnerable, to accept the possibility of risk and failure, is what allowed him to develop this technology that is now saving lives. Don’t be content to let your life just happen. Be active and present in it. Always consider what you can learn from whatever situation you encounter. This will help you avoid stressing over challenges and will keep you focused on moving forward, not looking back. Learning new things also helps keep your brain at the top of its game. When you actively ask questions and investigate experiences, you’re more likely to feel healthy mentally and emotionally. Gratitude isn’t just a feeling; it’s a way of life that requires active practice. Research has shown that practicing gratitude makes you feel healthier, happier, and more positive. Gratitude can help you overcome past trauma and strengthen your relationships with others. Recognize daily the things you are grateful for. Let your family, friends, and other significant ones know how grateful you are to have them. Share and express love while you can. Your life will feel more fulfilling when you actively practice being grateful.  Savor the moment. Humans have a bad tendency to focus on the negative aspects of life and ignore all the beauty and positivity around us. Take the time to acknowledge and savor the small moments of beauty in your everyday life. Think about what this experience means to you. Be mindful of the happiness it is bringing to your life in that moment. Writing these experiences down can be helpful. Even small things, such as an unexpected text from a friend or a beautiful sunny morning, can fill us with gratitude if we let them. Share your gratitude with others. You’re more likely to “store” positive things in your memory if you share them with other people. If you see a gorgeous flower while you’re riding the bus, text a friend to let her know about it. If your partner did the dishes as a surprise for you, tell him how much you appreciate it. Sharing your gratitude can also help others feel positive and inclined to look for ways to be grateful in their lives. Keeping a journal can help you reflect on your goals and values. It can also help you determine what’s going well in your life and what you’d like to continue to work on. Journaling can also be a great way to practice mindfulness. Journaling should be active, not simply a recording of your random thoughts and experiences. Rather than just recording every single thing that happened to you, use your journal to reflect on situations you experience. How did you initially react? How did that situation make you feel at first? Do you feel differently now? Would you do anything differently if you encounter a similar situation? Laughter really is the best medicine. Laughter lowers stress hormones and releases endorphins, your body’s natural mood elevators. It burns calories and sends oxygen to your body, helping you feel more positive and healthy. Laughter is also contagious; when you express joy through laughter, others are likely to share it with you. Laughing together can create emotional and social bonds. Your possessions can end up possessing you. A cluttered house full of things won’t make you happy. Make an active decision to have simple daily needs. Research has shown that often, a preoccupation with material goods is a way of covering up some deeper need. Have what you need, and need only what you have.  Highly materialistic people are often less happy and fulfilled than others. Stuff won’t make you happy, but the relationships you cultivate with others can. Get rid of things in your home that you don’t use or don’t like. Find a local charity to donate clothing, household goods, and other things that are just lying around your house. Simplify your personal life, too. It’s okay to say “no” to commitments or invitations. Choose to spend time doing things that are meaningful or helpful to you.
اجبر نفسك على الخروج من منطقة الراحة الاعتيادية. كُن واقعيًا. تصالَح مع إمكانية الفشل. ابحث عن فرص للتعلُّم. نمِّ لديك فضيلة الشعور بالامتنان. احتفظ بدفتر يوميات. اضحك.  اعمل على تبسيط احتياجاتك.