Knowing these can help you identify and adopt alternative behaviors that will help you achieve your goal(s). The things you do will be key to fixing your life. On another sheet of paper, list down all the things you do that keep you from realizing your goal(s) and fixing your life. These can be big or small habits and routines. Perhaps you stay up too late watching television and this makes you late for work. Or perhaps you eat three helpings of dessert after every meal and it’s affecting your diabetes. Identify when and where you're more likely to engage in these behaviors. Beware of these situations and places. For example, if your goal is ‘to lose x pounds in x weeks until I weigh x pounds’ but you eat donuts when you're stressed, then stress is a trigger to look out for. Think about what leads you to behave in certain ways or find yourself in situations that you don’t like? If you have a habit of spending too much money and acquiring debt, is there a particular thought, emotion, or occasion that motivates you to shop? Sometimes the root of these issues are deeply hidden and sometimes they are right in front of our faces. Give yourself time for gentle introspection. Ask yourself when a particular problem or behavior started— you might find answers there. Is there a feeling or thought that you are trying to avoid? When you were growing up, did you see someone displaying a similar pattern? Now that you understand which behavior is keeping your life the way it is, think of things you can do that will help you achieve your goal(s) and fix your life. The next time you are stressed, you can perhaps do breathing exercises or engage in other relaxation techniques. Or instead of spending two hours on Facebook or Tumblr before going to bed, you can spend half an hour doing that, and spend an hour and a half doing an activity that will directly help you achieve your goal(s), such as draft a resume. Your alternative behavior does not necessarily have to be a completely different behavior. You could reduce the amount of time you spend doing one thing and instead allocate that to another. The next time you feel like doing something that you know is detrimental to your life, choose to do something that will help you achieve your goal instead. This will require actively choosing one behavior over another. You will need to be disciplined.  Consider asking a friend to help you change your behaviors. Remember that you do not have to dislike something in order to stop doing it. You only have to want something else more.
حدد السلوكيات التي تعيقك عن تحقيق أهدافك. حدد الأنماط. حدد سلوكيات بديلة أكثر فعالية. استبدل سلوكياتك غير المنتجة بأخرى منتجة وفعالة.