If you don't want to hang out with your friend because they suggested something that you do not want to do or that you don't have time to do (e.g., hanging out the entire weekend), try compromising. You could let your friend know that you want to make plans but can't do the particular plan he suggested.  For example, if he wants to spend the whole weekend together but you're only free on Saturday, try suggesting something you both like to do that could be done on a Saturday. Is there a new movie out that you both want to see? That's one idea for a compromise; going to the movies can be fun and only takes a few hours. Tell your friend that you are sorry that you can't make plans this time. Be sure to offer a sincere apology if maintaining the friendship is important to you.  To offer a sincere apology, don't breeze past it; take your time saying sorry and give your friend your full attention when you are speaking. Here is an example of how to sincerely apologize to your friend: "I'm really sorry, I'd love to make plans with you but I just really can't this time. Again, sorry about that but let's re-visit this soon so we can work something else out." If the reason is something you feel comfortable sharing with your friend (i.e., it is not too personal), be sure to let him know why you can't make plans this time.  If you do not wish to share the reason, you can use something more vague such as "I'm just really swamped this weekend" or "my life is a bit crazy right now so I can't this weekend" or "thanks for the invite, and sorry, but I just really need some alone time to recuperate this weekend". Whatever you do, if you are going to give a specific excuse, make sure it is legitimate to avoid looking like a liar or a flake.  Examples of legitimate excuses include you already having other plans, you being busy with something else in your life, and you being very tired from the week and needing some down time or alone time. If you are letting your friend know why you can't make plans with him, keep it concise. Don't give a bunch of excuses; this will only make it seem like you are not being genuine. One sincere apology and genuine excuse should be enough. If you have tons of things going on you can just say that. Keep it cordial when saying no, even if you are busy and don't want to have a conversation about hanging out. No one likes to be rejected, even with something small like being turned down by a friend; it can sting a little sometimes.   To be polite, follow-up by telling your friend to have a good time if he goes ahead with the plans without you. Ask him to let you know how it goes. You can also try offering a suggestion for another mutual friend he could bring along instead; this will make it clear that you want him to have a good time and care about the friendship, and that you just can't make it this particular time. Say no firmly and definitely so that it is clear that you cannot do what your friend wants. If you give 'on the fence' answers like "I'll try to be there" or "I'll see; remind me later" when you know you don't want to do, you leave your friend on the hook. Leaving a friend on the hook when you know that you don't want to hang out is selfish; what if he wanted to make other plans but couldn't until you gave your final answer? While you shouldn't be wishy-washy if you know you can't or don't want to hang out, if you genuinely aren't sure yet, buy yourself sometime by asking whether you can get back to your friend soon. Be specific on when would be the latest that you would get back to him. Also, to be polite, since you are unsure whether you can hang out, tell your friend that you understand if he needs to make other plans if he doesn't hear back from you soon. If you don't want to make plans based on what he invited you to do, offer a follow-up plan. Get something penciled in for when you are less busy, otherwise your schedule may fill up again and you will have to say no again. For example, if you are busy the weekend he wants to go hiking, ask if you can go hiking next weekend instead. If maintaining the friendship is important to you, be sure to make that clear to your friend. If your friend does not take your turning his plans down well, you can try to preempt this by placing two "yeses" between your saying no to his plans. For example, if he wants to go hiking with you on the weekend you might say "thanks for inviting me; I'm glad we're friends, we do a lot of fun stuff together, but I can't make it hiking this weekend. I'm definitely into the idea though; let's go a different weekend when I'm less busy, instead?" Put yourself in your friend's shoes and think about your friendship and the conversation you are having from his perspective. Let him know that you understand that he wants to have a good time, but that you just can't hang out this time.
فكر في المساومة. اعتذر. وضّح أسبابك. تجنب تقديم اعتذارات متعددة. تحل بالأدب والتهذيب. تجنب الرفض غير الواضح. امنح لنفسك بعض الوقت إذا ما احتجته. اقترح خطة بديلة على صديقك. حاول أن تُجمل رفضك بكلمة "لا" ببعض الموافقات الإيجابية. جرّب الاعتماد على الردود المُتعاطفة.