Telling someone you self-harm can be very scary and difficult. Rehearsing some of the conversation can help you better get your message across when you tell your friend and give you confidence and empowerment. Practicing at home can also help you map out in your head what you are going to say and you can practice responses to potential reactions. Think about how your friend might react and come up with ways to respond. Face to face conversations are always harder but also permits you to get it out in real time. Plus, serious emotional issues deserve the face to face attention you need. Hugs and tears shared in person can be therapeutic.  Telling someone face to face can be very empowering. The initial reaction may not be what you hoped for, so be prepared for anger, sadness, and shock. Telling someone in person is a serious event and you deserve to be in a space of comfort and privacy when you disclose. Though this method means the person you are telling will be faced with shocking news without the immediate chance to respond, sometimes that delay is what you and they need. You can choose exactly what you want to say and how you want to say it without interruption. This will also give the recipient time to process the information. Be sure to follow up the letter or email with a phone call or face to face conversation since the person you wrote may be very worried about you. Waiting to hear from you again can be very anxiety inducing for your friend. End the letter with a plan to call them in 2 days or to email you when they are ready to talk. Telling a friend or other trusted person on the phone still lets you have the real time discussion with a buffer of not having to face their initial reaction in person.  You will not have the benefit of non-verbal communication this way, so be cautious to avoid misinterpretations. If you are telling someone who lives very far away, they may feel powerless to help you. Try to suggest ways they can support you even at a distance. Calling a helpline is a solid way for you to begin telling people and can give you the strength, courage, and confidence to tell someone you know. If you cannot find the right words to start the conversation, just showing someone what you have been doing to cope can pave the way to talking about it. Try to get them to focus on the meaning behind the behaviour right away, rather than focusing on the scars themselves. Getting your feelings out in a creative way can not only help you express yourself and then feel some relief but is another means of conveying how you feel to others. Saying “you made me cut myself” could take the focus away from your needs and make them defensive. An argument could start and derail a very important conversation. Even if your emotions stem from interpersonal issues you are having with them, it is always your choice to cut or self-harm, so blaming someone in anger will not help either of you. The person you tell might have endless questions for you. Be sure you choose a time to tell them when you have plenty of time to talk.  If they ask you a question you are not ready to answer, just say so. Don’t feel pressured into answering all of their questions. Questions you can expect may include: Why do you do it; do you want to kill yourself; how does it help you; is it something I did, and why don’t you just stop? It may be tempting to build up false courage and lower inhibitions by drinking before you tell someone but alcohol can heighten emotional responses and instability in an already difficult situation.
تدرّب أمام المرآة. اخبر صديقك بشكل شخصيّوبصورة سرية. اختر مكانًا تشعر بالراحة فيه؛ فالحديث مع شخص ما شخصيًا وفي موضوع جدِّي وخطير يستحق أن يكون في مكان تشعر فيه بالراحة والخصوصية عند الكشف عنه. اكتب رسالة أو بريد إليكتروني. اتصل بشخص ما. اظهر ندوبك لشخص تثق به. اكتب، ارسم أو لوّن حول الموضوع. لا تخبر أحدًا في غضب "لقد جعلتني أؤذي نفسي". كن مستعدًا للأسئلة. افعل هذا بدون كحول.