Competition has its place in life, but your marriage is not one of them.  Beyond playful competition, if you find yourself or your spouse trying to turn everything into a contest, work to stop this behavior.  Discussions and arguments should aim to solve problems, not win them.  Often times, being insecure can cause this overly competitive attitude.  Work on improving self esteem to avoid competitive behavior based in insecurity. The winner in any marriage should be both partners, not one or the other. Support your spouse instead of competing against her. Although it may be difficult at times, keeping a positive outlook can help any relationship.  Find things you love about your partner and focus on those aspects.  Don't be afraid to show or tell partner the things you appreciate.  Keeping your focus on the good can help increase not only your mood and outlook, but the mood of the marriage as well.  Do things for your spouse that you know will make her happy.  Don't expect anything as “payment”, simply enjoy doing something nice for her. Doing something generous can actually make you start to feel more generous and loving. Keeping positive over a period of time will help show your partner that your actions are genuine and stable. Dwelling on negative issues will only increase your own negative feelings and responses.  Although it may seem like you are doing something useful by holding onto negative  aspects of your partner, you are likely making things worse.  Drop any negative thoughts you may have been holding and avoid dwelling on them any further.  Anger, resentment, and blame will only cause more anger, resentment and blame. By letting negative thinking go, you can start to get a clearer picture of what you can improve instead of criticizing.
تجنّب السلوك التنافسي. كن إيجابيًا. توقف عن التفكير السلبي.