If you have decided you would like to end your friendship, make sure to do it right and give it the attention it deserves. You may be dreading it, but try and rise above those emotions and face the situation with maturity. Remember that at one time you were friends, and you may have to interact with this person in the future, so try and be as respectful as possible throughout this process.  Avoid breaking up with them over the phone. The only way this is acceptable is if you cannot see the person face to face for a long time, or if you are concerned about violent behaviors or your safety. Don't end your friendship with them over text or e-mail. It sends the wrong message about you as a person and how you deal with your friends. Additionally, it risks more misunderstandings in communication. Schedule a time and place to meet with your friend to talk about ending the friendship. Even if you are planning to have the conversation over the phone, schedule it so that you know you can both set aside some time to focus on this and nothing else. Try not to wait too long, chances are your friend can feel that something is up and waiting may make everyone unnecessarily anxious. Make the request simple and straightforward. Try “Hey, I think we should talk. When would be good for you?” There are several things to consider when planning your conversation with your friend. The goal is to create the space for the conversation to go as smoothly as possible. The following may help.  Have the conversation in a private place. It can potentially be a very emotional time and that shouldn't have to occur somewhere where you could draw an audience. Make sure you are both calm and that you are not having the conversation right before something very important such as a test or a performance review at your job. Keep a time limit in mind and avoid meeting somewhere, like over a meal, where you could potentially get stuck for longer than you would like. It is a good idea to sit down and prepare what you want to say to someone during any break up, but especially a break up as complex as this. Organizing your thoughts beforehand allows you be clear, firm, and thorough.  Make sure you are clear in your communication with your friend. There should not be any doubt in their minds about what you were trying to say after meeting with you. Be firm about what you want and what you don't want in your friendships, and in this friendship going forward. Be thorough and make sure you are communicating everything you want to say and everything you feel during this conversation. Planning this out will help you avoid the instance of “I should have said this!” later on. When planning what you are going to say, find a good balance between being honest, and being kind. Try to avoid blaming or being unnecessarily mean to your soon-to-be-ex friend. This is the potentially anxiety-inducing part, but hang in there. You have done all the preparation, so it is time to have the conversation that you have planned and prepared for with them. Explain how you feel, and why you think you should not be friends any longer. Be honest and straightforward but try and remain as nice as possible.  Start the conversation by acknowledging that this is difficult. “This is going to be really hard to say, and probably hard to hear.” Get to the point as quickly as possible. “I've been really unhappy in our friendship, and I don't think it is a good idea for us to be friends anymore.” As you get further into the conversation, you will reach a point where an explanation of why you want to end the friendship is necessary. Explain why you have been unhappy, with the least amount of blame possible. What ever your reason is try and start with the phrase, “I feel...” Here are some examples.  If your boyfriend cheated on you with your friend, “I feel like I cannot trust you, and I'm hurt that someone who considered themselves my friend would do that to me.” If they constantly make fun or you, or make you feel bad about yourself, “I feel like spending time with you is not healthy for me and my self-esteem because of some of the things you say about me.” You have explained why you think it is a good idea for you both to go your separate ways. Now, you can begin to end your part of the talk. You'll want to make sure you are kind and you mention some of the good parts of being friends as well. Try to:  Explain to them that you have an appreciation for the good times you have had together.  “I've really enjoyed spending time with you. I'll always keep those good memories close to my heart. Like that time we...” Split the blame, if you can. “I don't know, maybe we are just not compatible as friends. Or maybe I wasn't the best friend I could have been either.” You have said your side of things, give them a chance to respond to what you say. Be prepared for the fact that your friend may have many different emotional reactions. They may apologize profusely, they may get defensive or angry, or they may just be very sad. It is possible that they may experience all three. Try and hear them out. Address anything that might come up like any misunderstandings or anything that might change the way you feel about breaking up with them. Avoid getting into an argument with them at this point. If they respond with anger, they are likely to begin to say hurtful things to you or to try and blame you. Don't engage with them, simply tell them “I'm sorry you feel that way.” The way you end the conversation will depend on how they react to what you have said. Again, prepare for a variety of responses on their behalf, then no matter how the conversation goes, you have an exit strategy for yourself.  If they react with anger and begin raising their voice, don't engage with them and instead say, “I'd like to talk to you about this calmly, but if you continue to yell at me I'm going to leave.” If they react with sadness, allow some time to continue to talk and then when they are calm again try saying, “Thank you for taking the time to talk with me. I'm sorry this worked out this way.” If they are apologetic, see how you feel and consider whether or not you might want to try to repair the friendship. If you need some time to process what they say, tell them that. “I need some time to think about what you said. Can we talk again tomorrow?” Decide ahead of time what kind of contact you want from this person, if any, going forward. Make sure you are certain of your decision and communicate that to them at the end of your conversation. Be clear that this is what you want and ask them to respect it. Having your boundaries set before hand will make it easier to stick to them later on.  If you have mutual friends, suggest that maybe you two should only hang out in groups. If you would prefer to never have contact with them again, than that is fine too. Let them know that you would prefer they do not contact you going forward. If it is a toxic friendship, make sure for your own health you make a clean break with no contact.
واجه صديقك بقرار الانفصال عنه وجهًا لوجه. اطلب الالتقاء به. اختر وقتًا ومكانًا مناسبين للقاء. جهّز لما ستقول مسبقًا. تحدَّث معه. قدّم أسبابًا وجيهة. أنهِ حديثك. امنح صديقك الفرصة للتحدث. أنهِ المحادثة. أرسِ الحدود التي تريدها.