If you feel as though your obsessive ex has gone so far as to become a stalker, the situation might be dangerous. When this happens, you may need to seek outside help. Stalking is different than obsession because it involves a long-term pattern of harassment or abuse. Legally, stalking occurs when someone repeatedly (twice or more) comes near you or contacts you when you have asked him/her or not to, or made threats (verbal, written, or implied) that have caused you fear or the worry of harm. If you are the victim of stalking, contact the police. Stalking is illegal in all states. Common signs of stalking include when your ex:  Follows you Loiters near your home, workplace, or other area that you frequent Installs surveillance equipment in your home, car, etc., or threatens to install it Contacts you through inappropriate means, such as calling your boss to discuss your relationship Verbally harasses or abuses you, leaves obscene messages, or makes any other kind of inappropriate contact Harasses you or people close to you online through comments on social media, hacking your social media or email accounts, etc. Harms your pet Vandalizes or destroys your personal property Physically or sexually assaults you Does any of the above to your family members, friends, coworkers, or others who know you A protective order is issued by a court to prevent someone from contacting you. If your ex breaks the rules of this protective order, he or she can be arrested and fined or imprisoned. If your ex poses any kind of danger to you or others around you, contact authorities in your area about getting an order of protection. Laws governing these orders vary from location to location, but you can find out more about your options by contacting:  The police A lawyer A legal aid service A community service specializing in domestic abuse Whether or not you have an order of protection, if your ex puts you or someone close to you in danger, contact the police immediately. Even if the police do not seem to think the situation is a problem, be persistent in letting them know about your ex’s stalking behavior. Explain the seriousness of the situation, and refer to any past reports. If you are being stalked by your ex, contact the police with a full explanation of what is happening. It's important to get an official police report, which can help if you have to file for a protection order or press legal charges later. Document the stalking behavior as thoroughly as possible. Save copies of harassing emails, text messages, social media posts, etc. Take screenshots of things such as Facebook posts or tweets, since the user may delete them later. If your ex shows up to your home or place of work, document the day and time it occurs. Keep a record of every time you are harassed by your ex so that you will have evidence if you need to pursue legal action. Letting others know about the situation will help protect you. You might feel embarrassed or scared to tell other people about a stalking ex, but supportive friends, family, and community organizations will understand. They can also help you watch for any signs that your ex is trying to contact you, give you a place to stay if you want to get away, provide emotional support, and help in many other ways. If you are worried about your safety at your place of work or school, let your HR representative or school counselor know. Most companies have protocols in place to help protect you, such as offering a security person to escort you to your car or removing your ex from the premises if s/he shows up. Anyone can be victimized by a stalker, so it is not your fault if your obsessive ex becomes a dangerous problem. Even if you feel like you lead your ex on, his or her stalking behavior is not your fault, so contact authorities for help.
اعرفي عندما يتفاقم الموقف. احصلي على أمر حماية إذا كنتِ تحتاجيه. اتصلي بالشرطة إذا كان هناك أي علامات تهديد. احصلي على أمر شرطة كدليل. احصلي على دعم من الآخرين. افهمي أن الوضع ليس خطأك.