Start by making a list of the belief that you have about yourself, and consider how each one of these beliefs was formed. Then, work on identifying behaviors that come from those beliefs and work on refuting them. For example, if your dad has told you repeatedly that you’re not smart, then you may have accepted this. This belief may have affected your grades. You can refute this belief by asking for additional help with subjects that have been challenging for you and by improving in these areas, you can show yourself that you are smart. Unloading your thoughts and feelings onto a sheet of paper can be cathartic, giving you an outlet for pent-up emotions. Deal with any unresolved feelings about your father by writing a letter.  Write out everything that you have ever wanted to say to him in as much detail as possible. After you’ve finished writing, read the letter aloud to yourself as if you were sharing it with him. Then, destroy the letter by burning it or tearing it to shreds. This exercise is designed to help you heal, so delivering the letter is not required. However, if you’d like to send it, go for it. There are many negative effects of having a father who is physically or psychologically absent, such as poor future relationships and mental health problems. Counter these effects by nurturing yourself with regular self-care. Self-care can be anything that helps you feel nurtured. Try watching your favorite movies or TV shows, going for a quiet walk in nature, or massaging away the tension in your shoulders. Feeling unloved or alienated by your father can result in self-hatred and  low self-esteem. To counter these emotional problems, make an effort to highlight your personal strengths. Doing so can help you feel more self-confident despite lacking needed support from your dad.  Sit down and make a list of all the things you’re good at. If you have trouble coming up with strengths, ask a close friend to help you. Post your list on your mirror so that it’s always visible. Add to it when you discover more strengths. Write down compliments you get from other people, such as teachers or other adults that you respect. Then, when you’re feeling low, look at the list of compliments to remind yourself of what other people really think of you. The emotional wounds of having a terrible father may run deep, but it can help to share your feelings with others. Identify at least one friend with whom you can share your innermost thoughts and feelings. Talking to someone can facilitate the healing process. You might reach out by saying, “My relationship with my dad is really troubling me. I could use someone to talk to.” In addition to talking to your friends, it can also help to tell an adult what's happening at home. Try talking to another relative, a teacher, or your school counselor.  You might say, "Things are really tough at home. Dad's drinking is getting worse and I don't know what to do." Know that some people in authority might have to report your father's behavior to the police or child protective services. If you do not want to your father to get into trouble, you might avoid going into specifics with these individuals or talk to a peer's parent or an adult relative instead.
حدد الأشياء التي تؤذيك. اكتب رسالة لكن دون أن تسلمها. ابدأ  العناية بنفسك. تعلم تحديد مزاياك. ثق في صديق جدير بذلك. تحدث إلى شخص ذي سلطة.