If your partner thinks that you understand and sympathize with their behavior, they will feel safe.  This will make them more likely to share with you that they cheated.  Put your partner at ease.  Offer some excuse as to why you can understand what they did.  For instance, you might say, “I know I’m gone a lot for work.  I could understand if you’ve been seeing someone else.” Offer encouragement with phrases like, “I’ve always been honest with you” or “Please just be honest if you’re cheating on me.  I want to know the real you.”  You could also say, “It’s okay, I won’t be upset if you cheated on me.” Adopting an empathetic, gently approach is usually best, but some people won’t confess unless you turn up the heat a bit and show that you’re in control.  Don’t be aggressive or domineering – just make them a bit uncomfortable.  Get inside their personal space.  Bring your chair up more closely to your partner than you normally would. Take a small step toward them if you’re standing. Lean across the table when you speak. These subtle behaviors will shift the dynamic in your favor and could push them to spill the beans about what they’ve done. If your partner is violent or if you believe that they will become violent, avoid taking these steps. You may want to call The National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 for advice. If you know that your partner was not at the bar last night, don’t begin a conversation about their whereabouts by saying, “I know you weren’t at the bar last night.”  This tips your hand and makes it easier for them to deny they were cheating. Instead, wait for them to fall into the trap of providing an excuse, then compare their story with information you definitely know about where they were not seen and who they were not with.  This will allow you to deflate their alibi. If you think you have substantial evidence that your partner is cheating but aren’t 100% positive, you could make your case against them directly in an effort to get them to confess.  Find a quiet moment when you’re both home together.  Confront your partner by saying something like, “I know what’s going on,” or “I think we should talk about [the person your partner is cheating on you with].”  You could preface the conversation by offering your partner the chance to confess by asking, “Is there anything you want to tell me?” Bluffing can be effective when trying to get your partner to admit they are cheating, but if they don’t buy your bluff, they won’t admit what’s really going on.  Plus, afterwards, they will feel more confident that you know nothing about their activities. If you bluff your partner but they truly aren’t cheating on you, you’ll look quite foolish. When bluffing, guide your partner into telling you what they did by offering details with a narrative built on facts you know for sure.  For instance, you could say, “Every night this week you’ve been home really late.  You told me you were with friends, but you weren’t, were you?”  Then supply the narrative you believe (or know) happened.  Your partner should begin to make corrections and fill in details about what really occurred. Even if you’ve long suspected your partner is cheating, it can be heartbreaking and emotionally jarring when they finally admit it.  Despite the emotionally charged nature of the situation, do not start yelling or physically abusing your partner.  These behaviors are not just immature and unkind – they could also be grounds for legal action.  To react calmly, breathe in slowly and deliberately through your nose when hear that your partner is cheating.  Exhale through your nose and ensure your exhalation lasts longer than your inhalation. Excuse yourself to another room or go for a walk to clear your head if you need to. Call a friend or family member to let them know what’s happening.  The best way you can cope with the realization your partner is cheating on you is to get support from people who care about you.
أظهري التعاطف والتفهم لفعلة زوجك. مارس بعض الضغط. لا تدلي بمعلوماتك دفعة واحدة. تظاهر بإلمامك بكل شيء. اتركي المساحة لزوجك ليملأ الفراغات بنفسه. حافظي على هدوئك عندما تأتي لحظة الاعتراف.