Rejection is a side-effect of trying something new and brave. Even if it ultimately didn’t work out — the guy stopped calling, she didn’t get the role in the play, she was turned down for a promotion — she deserves credit for trying to get what she wanted.  It can help to remind her of the chances she had of rejection. For example, writers often paper their walls with rejection letters because they are so common. Even famous writers collect hundreds of rejection slips before publication. If the rejection was for something that had a low chance of rejection — an anticipated job offer, for instance — you can remind her that although she didn’t get it this time, she can try again. After all, everyone experiences rejection, repeatedly, over the course of a lifetime. Going out for the team, applying for colleges, trying to get the perfect job, or asking out the person you’ve been into all summer are all opportunities for rejection.  Even though every rejection feels personal, most of the time it’s just a matter of bad timing. It really doesn’t matter how smart, funny or talented you are — everyone will experience rejection. If it helps, find people who’ve eventually succeeded and look at the number of rejections they experienced. It can be helpful to remind your friend that he's not the only one who’s had rejection. Sharing your own rejections — the jobs you were fired from, the rejection slips you’ve received, the relationships that didn’t work out — can help your friend feel more normal and less alone.  At the same time, you’ll need to be aware that your friend’s experience might be very different from your own. Don’t talk too much about yourself, and don’t claim to know what your friend is feeling. Never say, “You will…” or “You should..” to encourage your friend. Although these phrases might seem supportive to you, they’re likely to be misunderstood by someone trying to cope with rejection. Instead, you can share how you coped with a rejection experience similar to what your friend is experiencing, and then state that everyone has their own way to cope with rejection. While your friend may have qualities that could use improvement, she certainly has positive qualities too. Remind her of what others appreciate about her. Offer specific examples that she can’t argue with.  For example, reminding your friend of her great sense of humor right after she’s cracked a dark joke about her situation can help her notice the truth of your statement. Don’t go overboard on compliments, or say things that you don’t really believe. Your friend will pick up on your insincerity. Being able to accept the rejection will help your friend move on to the next chapter in his life. If you’re helping hims to cope with the rejection, take the rejection at face value.  No one can predict the future. Maybe the person offered the job will refuse it, and he’s next in line. Or maybe his ex will change her mind. But holding out hope for a dramatic turnaround isn’t productive or practical. You don’t have to insist that he definitely won’t be offered the job, or that his ex won’t be changing her mind. Simply stay quiet, without agreeing. He’ll get the message. Rejection is a universal experience: some people will like us, some people won’t, and there’s very little we can do about it. Not every person we fall in love with will feel the same way; we won’t get every job that we want.  Encourage your friend to divert her attention to someone who might return her affection. Remind your friend of what she’s done recently that has earned positive attention and praise. What are some of the things that your friend used to enjoy before the rejection? Find ways to get him interested in some of these things again. Make a point of spending time together, going on hikes, watching sports games together, or going to movies.  If the rejection meant a loss of income, your friend may be financially stressed. Make sure that you’re finding things to do together that don’t require money, which may only make him feel worse. Try to avoid doing things together that might trigger memories of the rejection.
اثن على سعي صديقك للمحاولة. ذكّر صديقتك أن الرفض أمر شائع. فكّر في مشاركة تجارب الرفض التي مررت بها. تحدّث عن صفات صديقك الجيدة. لا تشجع صديقك على الاستمرار في الأمل. ساعد صديقك على عدم أخذ الرفض على محمل شخصي. ابحث عن طرقًا لرفع معنوياته.