Maybe you are not trying to go out of your way to see your crush, but you share a friend group and want to be friendly and cool with them- you can use these steps to help create a good connection with them. Or if you want to get into contact with your old crush and you can’t or don’t want to contact them directly, hang out with the mutual friends you have, and go to events they will probably be at.  You can call your friends and ask them about the events and parties that are coming up and then attend those events. Or if you know they go to certain church activities, for example, you can start attending those activities again. Don’t use your friends to get to your crush. For example, when you hang out with your friends, be there to have a good time with them first, and consider seeing your crush second. That way if it doesn’t work out, you will still have a good time, and you won’t mistreat your friends. When you first see each other, make sure you acknowledge them. If you see them across the room, give them a smile, and a friendly wave or greeting. If it doesn’t seem like a good time to talk, tell them “It is great to see you! I want to talk to you. Can you give me a minute?” You can finish doing what you are doing, and let them finish doing what they are doing, too.  Giving yourself a minute will help you compose yourself and can add a good element of anticipation for your conversation. Think about an interesting topic of conversation or something that you can ask them about as an ice breaker before you walk up and talk to them. For example, you can make an observation about the party you are at by saying something like, “I like that they really made sure that all of our chip needs are met at this party.” Then gesture to a table covered in 10 different types of chips. Once they are free to talk, start a conversation. If you are somewhere where it is difficult to talk, ask them, “Do you want to find a better place to talk?” Look for somewhere quiet and relaxed where you sit down and catch up uninterrupted. If you two have any awkward history together, break through that barrier by expressing your positive feelings at seeing them again. Once you two are settled, show them that you are happy to see them again by smiling, making eye contact, and simply saying “I am happy to see you.” Being positive and direct will make you seem confident and can help overcome any weirdness either of you might feel at the start of the conversation. Use your tone of voice and hand gestures to show them that you are interested in hearing about them. This will make you seem confident and happy to talk to her again. It can be a little less intimidating if you ask them how they are doing now because having to recount everything that has happened since the last time you saw each other might require a lot of explanation.  Say something like, “I’d love to her how you are doing now.” Or you can start by saying what you remember of what they were doing last. For example, you can say “If I remember right, the last time we talked you were…” Avoid talking about anything awkward or difficult things from the past. If the conversation progresses that way naturally, you can talk about deeper topics, but at the beginning of the conversation you want to keep it light and positive. When they tell you how their life has been, listen attentively by making eye contact, nodding along with what they say, restating their main ideas and asking them relevant questions. For example, if they say they have been having a hard week, ask them what has been going on that has made their week hard. Think of positive, funny or lighter stories that will give them an idea of what you have been up to lately. Consider talking about topics that you know they are interested in.  For example, if they love marine biology, you can say “I went on a trip with my school recently to Catalina Island, and we had a blast snorkeling.” Mirror or match their energy level and body language in conversation.  For example, if they are talking energetically and using lots of body language, use lots of body language in response and laugh often. Or if they seem a little more reserved, you can talk quieter and give them more physical distance. Don’t copy their gestures; however, do go for a similar level of energy. After you feel like you have had a chance to catch up and made a good connection in your conversation, tell them you really liked talking and ask them about getting together again. After you have finished laughing about something, for example, you can say “I really liked talking with you again. We should get together again and continue catching up.” If they seem interested in going out with you, make sure you have their correct contact information, and arrange to get together to do something in the near future. If they are ambiguous about whether they can hang out again, don’t push it. It is better to let them tell you when they are free. Sometimes people may be nervous in the moment and may come off uninterested, and at other times, they are sending you a message that they are not interested. Send them a follow up message or text to find out which is the case. For example, if they say something like “I don’t know, I’m going to be busy for a while.” You can say, “No problem, it was really good catching up with you. I’m glad we got the chance.” If you got their information and you are going to get together soon, you should send a follow up text sometime in the next couple of days that says something like “It was really good catching up- I am excited to hang out again.”  If they seemed like maybe they wanted to hang out again, then follow up with a simple message or text that says “It was really awesome catching up with you- let me know if you want to get together sometime.” This kind of text is low pressure while also getting across that you are interested in hanging out more.
فكر في المكان الذي ستلتقي بها فيه. اذهب إليها وقل مرحبًا وأخبرها أنك تريد التحدث. ابدأ الحوار معها. أخبرها أنك مسرور برؤيتها. اسألها عن أحوالها. اسألها أسئلة متابعة. أخبرها عن أشياء مشوقة حدثت لك. اسألها ما إن كان بالإمكان الخروج معًا من جديد. ركز على ردة فعلها. تابعها بإرسال رسالة نصية لها.