” Because it can be very hard to come up with ways to reduce your anger in the heat of the moment. Try coming up with an advance plan to help you calm yourself in the event that you get angry. Having this plan in mind will help you manage your anger productively.  For example, you might plan to take a “time out” if you feel yourself beginning to grow angry, in which you calmly tell the other person that you’re feeling upset and need to take a break. If you are in a conversation that’s making you angry -- such as a conversation about a heated issue like politics or religion -- make an effort to shift the conversation to a more neutral and pleasant topic. Cognitive restructuring can help you experience anger less frequently. Anger often leads to exaggerating your response to events or experiences and can make you spiral out of control. Changing the way you think about your experiences and goals can help you both avoid feeling angry in the first place and manage your anger when you do experience it.  Avoid totalizing words like “never” or “always.” One tendency of anger is that it blots out our memory of other experiences, which can increase frustration. These words also hurt others and make people feel defensive instead of cooperative. Instead of saying things such as “I’m always such an idiot” or “You never remember what’s important,” focus on what is actually occurring. You may find it helpful to make a plain statement of fact to yourself, such as “I forgot my cellphone at the house” or “You forgot our dinner plans,” to help you keep things in perspective. Remain logical. Of course it’s easier said than done, but reminding yourself that the negative experience encouraging you to feel angry isn’t the only experience you will likely have that day. Remembering that the irritation, no matter how big it may seem, is only temporary will help you overcome your feelings of anger more quickly. It’s easy to assume that your first impression of a situation or experience is the “right” one, and it can be very difficult to give up the idea that there is an objective truth to every situation. However, being more flexible with how you approach experiences and events will help you react with less anger to them. For example, if someone cut in front of you while you were waiting in line at the store, you might assume they don’t care about your needs and were being rude, and that assumption could lead you to feeling angry. While that assumption might be true, it’s not productive. Approaching that experience flexibly, such as imagining that the other person just didn’t see you or may be preoccupied with some stressful issue of their own, will help you let go of the personal feeling of anger. Developing an  assertive communication style can help you feel more in control of your own life and experience less anxiety and anger. Assertive communication and behavior isn’t about being arrogant or selfish; it’s just about clearly and calmly expressing your thoughts, feelings, and needs to others in an open and honest way. If you aren’t honest with others about your needs, they may not be able to meet them, and that experience can result in your feeling angry, depressed, and unvalued.  Use “I”-focused statements such as “I’m feeling confused about what you said” or “I would like you to be on time when we go to see a movie together.” Avoid name-calling, threats, and attacks on the other person. Use cooperative statements and invite others’ opinions. Be as direct and clear as possible about your desires and needs. For example, if you’ve been invited to a party that you don’t want to attend, don’t just say something like “Oh, well,I guess I’ll go if I have to.” Instead, state clearly but politely that you don’t want to go: “I would prefer not to attend that party.” Meditation not only decreases anxiety and alleviates depression, it also can help you maintain your calm even during upsetting experiences. A recent Harvard study showed that meditation has a positive effect on your brain function, especially in the area of emotional processing. The study examined two forms of meditation:  “mindfulness” meditation and  “compassionate” meditation. While both reduced participants’ feelings of anxiety and anger, compassionate meditation was even more effective than just mindfulness.  Mindfulness meditation focuses on being completely present in the moment and being aware of and accepting your body’s experiences. This type of meditation is similar to the meditation you might do in a yoga class. Compassionate meditation, also sometimes called loving-kindness meditation, is based on a set of lo-jong, or Tibetan Buddhist practices, focused on developing your feelings of compassion and love for others. This type of meditation may require you to seek some instruction before you can effectively practice it on your own. Sleep deprivation can do a variety of damages to your body, including causing physical stress and increasing your risk of developing a mood disorder such as depression or anxiety. Poor sleep or too little sleep can also cause irritability, mood swings, and a tendency to feel angry more often than usual. Sleep experts recommend that the average adult get an average of at least seven to eight hours of sleep per night, although you may require more or slightly less sleep to feel fully satisfied depending on your own body’s needs. Once you have let go of your angry feelings, sharing your feelings and experiences with the person who angered you can be helpful. For example, if someone hurt your feelings by ignoring you at a party, calmly talking to that person and explaining why you felt hurt may help them understand how their behavior affected you. It may also help you feel more in control of the situation. It is very important to wait until you’ve processed your anger to talk with the other person. If you approach them while you’re angry, you will likely only make the situation worse, and you could end up causing hurt as well. Always use non-violent communication when interacting with others. A therapist can help you work through the underlying feelings and motivations behind your anger. This is especially helpful if your feelings and their causes aren’t particularly clear to you. Cognitive therapy, in which therapists help you learn how to think about experiences differently, can be particularly helpful for anger management.
ضع "خطة للغضب". قم بإعادة هيكلة تفكيرك. قم بالتفكير في المواقف بمرونة. تعلّم المصداقية. قم بتجربة التأمل. احصل على قسط كافي من النوم. قم بمشاركة خبرتك مع الشخص الذي أغضبك. قم بزيارة معالج نفسي.