You are always less likely to hurt someone’s feelings if you can communicate how you feel and what you need without making them defensive. Try to describe in detail how you feel, and help them picture what you need.  For example, you could say, “I've had such a hard week at work. In an ideal world, I'd be able to lie in my bed all day. Can I ask you a favor? Would you mind if we didn’t hang out tonight?” If you need more time than that, you could say, "I'm going through a lot right now, and I really need some time to reevaluate things. Can I ask you a favor? It's a big one. Would you mind if we didn’t hang or talk for a few weeks?” If you want to politely decline social invitations, but you are feeling shy, just follow a script. This will help you not to overly-apologize. It is perfectly okay to say “no” without saying “I’m sorry.” Here are a few samples:  When you just want to say no: “My week has been really busy. I think I need to take it easy tonight. Thanks though!” When you don’t want to hang out with a whole group: “Thanks for thinking of me, but I have to pass. Do you want to make plans for just the two of us? I need a breather from group situations. When you aren’t up for it tonight, but still want to meet up another time: “This sounds like so much fun! Would it be possible to get a rain check?” When you really don't want their friendship anymore: "I don't know how to say this, but I don't think we really mesh with each other. I'm going to put this friendship on the back burner for a while." Any time you ask a friend for space, you run the risk of making them feel unwanted. If this is a friendship you want to hold on to, you can minimize these feelings by offering an alternative.  If you're not up for going someplace really public, maybe you'd be okay with just handing out together at home? If you really just need to be alone right now, maybe you could make plans for next week? If you need space for quite a while, maybe you'd be okay with just texting once or twice a week? All relationships involve give and take. If this is a friendship you'd like to preserve, think about your friend’s needs as you assert your own need for space. Remember, there's almost always some way for both of you to have your needs satisfied. For example:  If they need reassurance or attention to feel happy, consider checking in with them on a regular basis. If they realize they have a need for reassurance and attention, they could try to get that need met in some other way while you recharge. Whatever you do, don’t fabricate a lie to get out of hanging out. It is perfectly normal to want space. It is nothing to be ashamed of or to be sorry about, so there is no reason to lie. It won’t make you feel good and you won’t enjoy the space you receive.  People almost always find out the truth, which is often more hurtful than the lie. Your friend may feel hurt when you ask for space, but they'll feel worse when they find out that you lied and broke their trust.
ارسم صورة ذهنية لما تريده. اتبع السيناريو. اعرض على الشخص حلًا بديلًا. فكر في احتياجاتهم. تجنَّب الكذب.