text: But the most important thing down the stretch is for the Jets to see if: a) Greg McElroy should be around in training camp next summer to challenge for playing time in 2013; and b) Mark Sanchez has a shot to be the incumbent entering the offseason.
  
  f. Beernerdness: Can't beat getting off a train in Providence Friday night and finding the Luxe Burger Bar a few steps away with the last few minutes of Celtics-Sixers, and Harpoon IPA on tap. Now that's a quality 90 minutes before bed right there.
  
  Oh c'mon. I'm pretty sure it's a state law that every pub in New England has to have Harpoon IPA on draft. He's acting like he found Bell's Hopslam.
  
  It's amazing how this guy continues to think he actually has an elevated palate, when he's really drinking mass-produced beer and coffee.
  
  I was the Passenger You Don't Want to Be Near in the Quiet Car, on an Amtrak regional train, Providence to New York, Saturday afternoon. The idiot passenger. I put my phone on vibrate, and 10 minutes into the trip, it vibrated, and I answered it, bent over and whispering, not sure who it'd be. Of course the conductor came by. "Library-type atmophere, sir,'' he said. "Off the phone.'' I got off. Twenty minutes later, there was another call. Not urgent, but I picked it up anyway. Same deal. Conductor walked over. "Last time I'll tell you this,'' he said. "Off the phone or move."He was right. I was wrong. The car was half-empty, but that doesn't matter. I was what I shake my head at on the Quiet Car often -- the idiot who whispers on the phone when you're not supposed to be on the phone. Felt like a bum. The rules of the train are not complex. If you can't follow 'em, walk.
  
  edit: the answer is clearly that he thinks he is above the law because he is Peter King and he was hoping the conductor would recognize him and tell him it was ok since it was probably important NFL business. Fucking twat.
  
  g. So I made my semi-annual pilgrimage to my favorite restaurant in New Jersey, Osteria Giotto in Montclair, the other night. And I thought about lots of different things to order, but I did what I do nine out of 10 times there: "Lasagna." And our server, Marisa, told me every time I go in there and have the lasagna and then mention it in the column, they have a run on lasagna and can't keep it in the place. Well, tell the boss to make extra this week, Marisa.
  
  [Inner Monologue] Boy, am I a great guy, or what? Who else would've gone through the trouble of telling thousands, no millions!, of people how good their lasagna is? I really am special. My mother was right. Hey, I should add a section to my column about this. How about Entree-Nerdness. Yeah, I like the sound of that. [/Inner Monologue]
  
  It's never been better than I had the other night. So good, in fact, that I got two pieces to go and froze one. I took Brandon Jacobs there before the NFC title game almost five years ago, and he was so smitten with the lasagna that he got four pieces to go.
  
  Quote from 7/25/11:
  
  I've blown smoke at Osteria Giotto on Midland Avenue in Montclair a few times, like the time I took Brandon Jacobs of the Giants there two nights before the Giants and Pack played in the NFC Championship Game -- and Jacobs loved the lasagna so much he had to get two pieces to go for a late-night snack.
  
  edit: the answer is clearly that he thinks he is above the law because he is Peter King and he was hoping the conductor would recognize him and tell him it was ok since it was probably important NFL business. Fucking twat.
  
  The fact that he is self aware enough to call himself the guy he hates but NOT self aware enough to not pick up the phone, especially on the 2nd call, is borderline psychotic.
  
  Oh c'mon. I'm pretty sure it's a state law that every pub in New England has to have Harpoon IPA on draft. He's acting like he found Bell's Hopslam.
  
  It's amazing how this guy continues to think he actually has an elevated palate, when he's really drinking mass-produced beer and coffee.
  
  The thing is...Luxe is pretty far from a Pub. It's a casual dining place with a bar that tries to market itself to the downtown hipsters in Providence (dim lighting, pop art on the wall, lounge feeling etc).
  
  Peter probably thought it was the coolest fucking place on earth, when in reality, it's just a place that makes a decent burger, it's impossible to watch a game at, and was half-full of PC couples going downtown for their Big Date before they ambled over to Ri-Ra, Trinity or the Dorrance.
  
  I had a very hard time believing that King actually wrote another haiku at the end of his column again, so I checked to make sure you were not playing with us.
  
  After the reaction he got last week, for him to include this is ..... well, it's just mind-numbing. King really needs to die in a fire.
  
  Holy fuck.
  
  I mean, this underscores the utter mockery that his last haiku was in that he was so moved to write a haiku for the victim... and now he wants to make it a regular shtick and write shitty haikus with jokes about players' names?
  
  This thread is actually taking a beating in that every time we try to make fun of something, he doubles down and takes it to a level our mockery never could have imagined. It's pretty clear who the pro douchebag here and who is only dabbling in pick-up league.
  
  I mean, this underscores the utter mockery that his last haiku was in that he was so moved to write a haiku for the victim... and now he wants to make it a regular shtick and write shitty haikus with jokes about players' names?
  
  The haikus have been his regular schtick since Week One. They're all awful, just terrible.
  
  Not all division winners play eachother. The NFL schedule is 6 division games (each team home and away), 4 games against each team in one division in your own conference (2 home, 2 away), 4 games against each team in one division in opposing conference (2 home 2 away) and then 2 games (one home one away) on a rotational basis (two divisions in your own conference) against a team that finished in the same "place" as you did.
  
  So this year for the Pats it was AFC West division winner (Denver) at home, AFC North division winner (Baltimore) on the road
  
  2013 it is AFC West at home again, AFC South away (division winner in each case since the Pats won the division, so Denver at home and probably Houston away).
  
  Right, but in 2014, their AFC divisonal matchup is against the AFC West anyways, so he's right. The Pats will always play all 3 division winners in the AFC as long they win their own division. They have the two positionally determined games, and then the 3rd in their rotating division. It's just that the 3rd division winner isn't being played because they were a division winner, but because of the division vs. division scheduling. It evens out to all division winners in each conference playing each other every year.
  
  King's comment was in regards to the AFC East Champs having the AFC West champs at home two years in a row in a positionally determined game. Ideally, it should have rotated back to AFC West hosting.
  
  Not all division winners play eachother. The NFL schedule is 8 division games (each team home and away), 4 games against each team in one division in your own conference (2 home, 2 away), 4 games against each team in one division in opposing conference (2 home 2 away) and then 2 games (one home one away) on a rotational basis (two divisions in your own conference) against a team that finished in the same "place" as you did.
  
  So this year for the Pats it was AFC West division winner (Denver) at home, AFC North division winner (Baltimore) on the road
  
  2013 it is AFC West at home again, AFC South away (division winner in each case since the Pats won the division, so Denver at home and probably Houston away).
  
  Right, but in 2014, their AFC divisonal matchup is against the AFC West anyways, so he's right. The Pats will always play all 3 division winners in the AFC as long they win their own division. They have the two positionally determined games, and then the 3rd in their rotating division. It's just that the 3rd division winner isn't being played because they were a division winner, but because of the division vs. division scheduling. It evens out to all division winners in each conference playing each other every year.
  
  King's comment was in regards to the AFC East Champs having the AFC West champs at home two years in a row in a positionally determined game. Ideally, it should have rotated back to AFC West hosting.
  
  Good point, I'm an idiot.
  
  In terms of the rotational game, it looks like it is a fairly regular occurrence (for whatever reason) for it to be the same division twice in a row. Just looking at the Pats:
  
  2012 and 2013: AFC West home2013 and 2014: AFC South away2014 and 2015: AFC North home
  
  I understand what he meant to say, he just phrased it really, really stupidly. But that will happen when you don't have an editor.
  
  He got to the real point in the next sentence: "The last seven champs have played only seven home games in all, in addition to the 12 road games, which means the champ has come out of the pack of those teams that often end up scrambling to make the playoffs at the end."
  
  If he just wrote that sentence without the 12-0 line preceding it, he makes the exact same point (many recent Super Bowl winners have been road warriors in the playoffs).
  
  He got to the real point in the next sentence: "The last seven champs have played only seven home games in all, in addition to the 12 road games, which means the champ has come out of the pack of those teams that often end up scrambling to make the playoffs at the end."
  
  If he just wrote that sentence without the 12-0 line preceding it, he makes the exact same point (many recent Super Bowl winners have been road warriors in the playoffs).
  
  I worked out that that was the point, but he doesn't actually fully explore whether or not he has a point. Basically, it's a nod towards the idea that home field advantage may not be as important as we think it is... but then he just leaves it there. And writes about it poorly. It's just another one of these, hey, isn't that interesting and the appropriate response is... um... maybe?