Ōe remembers his elementary school teacher claiming that Emperor Hirohito was a living god, and asking him every morning, "What would you do if the emperor commanded you to die?" Ōe always replied, "I would die, sir. I would cut open my belly and die." At home in bed at night he would acknowledge his reluctance to die and feel ashamed. After the war, he realized he had been taught lies and felt betrayed. This sense of betrayal later appeared in his writing.