Speaking in a comically downtrodden, empathetic voice, and accompanied by an accordion rendition of "Beautiful Dreamer", he begins "Hi ya Folks", followed by "You say you lost your job today...", and then a litany of improbable nonsensical disasters like "ya say your wife went out for a corned beef sandwich last weekend, and the corned beef sandwich came back but she didn't", "Your daughter's goin' out with a convict" and "Your wife just confessed she gave your last 60 dollars as a deposit on an airplane hangar" or "you say you can't pull your car outa the mud and you're in the middle of nowhere and it's pouring rain and you can't get the top back up, and you're paycheck's all blurred, and you're foot went right through the gas and your girl's screaming bloody murder she's scared of the dark, and a stroke of lightning splits your motor in half and your suit's shrinkin up fast, and you start up the windy road on foot and 60 yards of barbed wire hits you right smack in the puss, and you both fall down in the mud and then a wild animal comes over and runs away with your shoes, and your car blows up suddenly and you're windshield wiper ends up in your mouth, and you can't move and the mud's rising up to your nostrils and you're sinkin fast, and you don't hear your girl screaming any more" - a pause as the background music retires, and Eddie asks plaintively, "Is that what's troubling you, friend?"