it meant we really were going home . for some reason it felt like the first time in her life she could feel that way , believe it for certain . besides , i did n't want to hurt him . i moved off the stage and sat before them in the front pew . a female slave walked near each litter carrying a peacock tail to brush off dust and keep away flies . my eyes are half-closed , staring into a darkness which slowly grows clearer . `` sorry to interrupt your girls ' night . we can plan in the car . 