or am i doomed to live the rest of my life surrounded by men at fast food restaurants on $ 5 sandwich day , or guys opening new accounts at banks to get a free pair of tickets to a big amusement park , or- i take a slow , deep breath and remember the heat of his fingers on my arm . `` you 're lying to yourself now ? '' they 're just trying to help , i offered . i wanted to grab jack , to wrap my arms around him and pull him away . 