`` i just ... really want a baby , and i 'm not sure he 's on board . when i turned toward him , he was right there behind me , grabbing my head and kissing me hard . `` i ... '' she paused , a glimmer of doubt in those green eyes . `` it was n't me , '' she said faintly . hed been serving up stew at the soup kitchen in st. francis when perry appeared at his side and said , you need to come with me . 