you wo n't cut me out of it . '' caroline blamed it on the alcohol combined with her staggered emotions , but she wanted him more than anything she ever remembered . panicked , she straightened and raced down the hall , down the steps . it was about to smash bolt into a frosty pudding . bird , she looks down at the bubbling water , and quick as anything she slips down into the pot . `` i think it 's a waste of time , '' i said . gardener looked at her , shocked again . 