i 'd made a promise to fight for her , and i 'd pay whatever cost . a nagging sense of fear turned my stomach to stone , and i felt a sliver of ice sliding down the nape of my neck . she should have died right then . what if one of the twins wakes up and needs you ? i fight the urge to drag her down from the tree . so this is what it is like to die ? `` because you knew what i needed-to step a foot off that ledge . the way he was disgusted me . 