`` fight it , '' nicky said in my ear . in his mind , im eternally piggy-tailed and five years old . they were damp and slippery with mold , and he went down carefully . both friend and foe we accept it . he 'd say they were fucked up the way he would point out that the sky was blue . she knew a nice long walk alone was what she needed and decided to walk around the lake and into the woods towards the meadow . 