that a**hole had you pinned against a wall , and you looked scared out of your mind . and he was still smiling when , just before he dozed off , the phone rang again . but the guy stayed at the door and asked if i was alright . lucas leaned against the dresser and frowned at me . `` it could n't have been yesterday , because yesterday i took that load of barrels over to toad-face 's farm . `` you do n't want the answer to that question . '' my life was in these walls , these books . 