had he somehow startled her , he wondered to himself . most of them were drinking and she saw a few of them on the back porch , smoking . for one second , maybe two , i 'm there : rushing toward the shore as if the wind itself is carrying me , and then i feel my balance go and i tumble over into the water . the servant bowed and quietly left the room . cole asked , setting aside what remained of his soup . he was dying , could n't she see that ? 