`` yeah , '' j stared tip-toe out the window . it was hot , so hot my knees totally buckled and he took all my weight into his body . instead i 'd shut myself off from her again . `` fine , do n't look at me when you f**k me , '' i said . i knew he was holding himself on straightened arms . if i play my cards right , there 's going to be a wedding , but it wo n't be with you . 