want him so badly that her heart had seemed to break when he kept pulling away , but she 'd survive his rejection . daniels eyed her as though disgusted . asked the doctor as he pulled the door closed behind him . you needed a way to store the original goal so it did n't get lost . it is a form of genius , you know ? he went to bed hard , woke up hard , and was now sitting outside a dressing room , hard . `` i want to see it with my own eyes . 