not only do we want , or need to suck , but we seek to be sucked . a few years ago she might have been insulted by that . i guessed i had better get used to this . it made her smile again just thinking about it . `` not too much , to be honest . '' thank goodness because i did n't think i 'd be able to get any work done with everything spinning in my mind . i might seem like a silly woman doing her silly exercises , but face some simple facts for a minute . 