`` he says he wants nothing more to do with me . he spins me so my back is against the wall and looks down at me . what would that mean for me ? but does she want to be the leader ? '' i rolled over and got into the sitting position as well , hoping to blend in . what if the fire was too strong ? there was n't much `` up and down '' in the sound of his voice . i did not hear from her again for over three years . 