i squeezed the black coat jacket wrapped around me , and scanned the small cuts from my right arm when father pushed me on that bush . kneeling down , i found her pressed against the wall , knees tucked against her chest and eyes wide . seeing the audience from the stage was almost impossible . `` you are a stupid girl , no matter what else you believe yourself to be ! '' mrs. jones suggested that you and i take a couple of horses and ride out to the edge of her property . 