rush was her husband and she was dying with the need to be his wife in every way . then gates looked at the lighted square and the blood drained from his head . i think about what i have on there . theres also a buzz of voices , with not even a word of it making any sense to me . she felt an urge to turn around and run to find the boys to warn them to keep from flying at any cost , but she changed her mind and decided to keep listening for a little longer . 