her eyes had been so sad , so different from her earlier excited demeanor , such as when she 'd been asking about mermaids , of all things . `` i 'm not believing that until i see the whites of your eyes , buddy . hes been out there in the real world , and he knows what its like . well can you know what i never do ? thats what i got for breaking the rules . he buried them here to stop people finding this out . i shifted the cane to my left hand and shook out my fingers . 