i saw him swallow hard and look away , letting go of my hand as soon as possible . grabbing his wallet from the dresser , he walked into the kitchen , where emma was examining a sheet of paper . i did n't know what to say , so i kept quiet , fidgeting slightly . he 'd gone out to face those monsters rather than let them attack the people in the restaurant . she and i are going to have to have a little girl to girl chat , someday . `` not every day but most days . ' 