by the time they finished with me and moved on to the next person , i was n't sure what to expect . for some reason i do n't think she 'd approve if i just did it to show off . '' how had i allowed myself to get so worked up ? `` i 'm not going anywhere , you idiot man . and i keep getting this feeling that the beaver dam project has something to do with it . we shall ride about the estate , visit a tenant or two , then stop for a picnic . 