`` i thought it 'd come to me , and i 'm blank . '' besides , i 'm used to cooking for my brothers . it does not agree with him . every eye in the room turned toward the guard . without that , i might never have come here tonight , despite knowing that you did n't want me here . no , there was much more to it than that . i 'd want the chance to know , to decide for myself . you would n't know about being on top . this reminds me so much of school . 