`` this seems like really far out of the way . '' `` you ask yourself what happens , '' miller said . the hand , though , did not come . i wo n't have sex with one guy and pretend he 's another . or , you know , something slightly more likely than that . are they waiting for me there too ? '' he stared at something over her shoulder , clearly seeing into his own past rather than at her . it comes into view like a tiny puff of rising dust . 