sitting back down on the edge of the bed , i rubbed my eyes , hoping that the effects of the drug would clear soon . `` only because you could n't stand to touch me . '' i wipe my eyes again and force a smile . you can trust her , he urged . i do n't know any other way to move through the world . '' `` how do you know where it is ? '' his fingers slipped over the curve of her stomach while his mouth continued to suckle her . 