lucy 's scream locked up my throat , however , and i nearly dropped the phone . there 's a diary under my pillow in my bedroom , and i know he reads it . `` that 's why she thinks i wo n't miss her , '' i said , my voice breaking . you bullied me back then but it 's my turn , now . '' the ma'at are ready to move , is that what you 're telling me ? '' i wish i 'd known where it would get me . 