so you go through the door and its like a really long hallway . it took dean a moment to catch on , but then he led the way down the stairs , closing the door firmly behind us . i was taking six at one point , but between my job and ... stuff i just could n't keep up . '' she was going to a new school in two months , her first public school . i still had a full life to live and had felt as though ben were a thief of my dreams . 