either she 'd overcome the past or the past would overcome her . she eyed the nursery monitor , then raised it to her ear . wait for me to get done in the field house , '' i begged her . she swiped at the tears running down her cheeks . i do n't know how to be anything else but who i am , and who i am will never be good enough to make it in this place with these people . according to my watch , it only took me five minutes . 