tell the story around your friends to other white people ; watch as the white people look on and drool over your post-modern coolness . i 'm whispering , paranoid that he 's got his ear pressed up against the door now . it was at times like these that she felt like a stranger in her own life and she realized that after all the years of searching , she still had n't the vaguest clue of who she really was . those wide brown eyes looked nervous . 