now offer him. i have tried from day one of this constant battle with my health to not allow myself to be seen as an illness first, person second, and with this as well as with the kind of person i am, i don't show how i feel an awful lot, even on days where the pain is making me angry: i constantly battle with myself to not show it. this may get a lot of people shaking their heads and saying, “that's not healthy”, but this is my way of getting stronger and pushing through. if i opened up fully then i don't think i could be quite as 