it is not that i wanted to die if i could not be with him , it is that it would make me very sad to make him leave , to see him with another woman , to see him at all , really i could not begin to imagine pennys disappointment and her sadness ; she would hate to see james go . but he must not be impatient . it would make life so much simpler for so many people . '' `` i have to run , guys , '' the first one said , pushing back from the table . 