`` no , you were just gone a long time . we were fourteen or fifteen , and someone at school had taught us what a blow job was . instead , he seemed to be studying her , as though hed not quite made up his mind about her . so we ca n't let it go south , that 's all . '' i stopped dancing and stood there with my mouth open . i was n't to see him again until the wedding . the soft tapping picked up again and floated from the kitchen , where i had just been . 