look , im not going to apologize for being here . unlike everywhere else he had been that day , the air in his office was cold and stale . he grinned and showed me both his hands , palms up . no , sending ben out to dig into her past had been what had finally torn the veil away . once seated , she stared out the window . all three of us turned toward the spine-chilling noise . and if i wanted to be happy , i had to be the one to make the leap . 