dean squeezed her shoulder and winked . i want you to do it again and dig deeper . '' `` because , i mean , yeah , i could control them , but it took nearly everything out of me . '' it was the first time troy said he loved me . i blinked , because it sounded like they 'd read my mind . the little spark of hope i felt quickly died . the pain in his chest got worse . he was limping around like an idiot this morning . he let some of that anger show . 