for now , she would tackle what was within her control . my heart thumped beneath my ribs , revealing this failure to her - the fact that i 'd been standing inside , debating following her at all , while a predator wound through the parking lot behind her . she stepped to one side , grabbed for her stick , snapped it up to protect her face . better if he had shot me in the leg or arm . then what the hell is that thing ? i was tired , so i leaned back in my chair and i died . 