i had been kidding about the gravel embedded in my back , but he found some small rocks , sure enough , and plopped them into a metal pan and showed them to me , and hunter yelled at him . the way he says it makes my heart jump . feel her heart beat next to his . she also decided that she was responsible for alan , she wouldnt leave him , abandon him the way everyone else in his life had done . i thought you knew , the way you sounded so sad . 