how i 'd find the strength to walk into the police station and tell my story though , i 'd never know . what would my life have been like if i had remained with her as a child ? and now there was no going back . he was n't going to make a mess for someone else . `` look in the garbage can , the one loaded on the cart , right now ! '' lucas , he was the only precious thing she had to lose , and she wasnt going to let that happen . 