she 'd get wind of my situation and be there to take away my child . some hit he was trying to figure out how to do . would he ignore me until he came ? he asked with a soothing voice and without looking away for a single second . i wasnt there , he pleaded , noticing her doubt . perhaps if you told me where i could find it , i could get started on something . '' `` apparently , i even turned her off that night . the hours passed at a snails pace for me . 