without being able to help it , i let out a soft moan . i 'm going crazy not knowing what 's going on . '' i headed to the bathroom , hoping to take a quick shower . you hear me when i say its a lost cause ? she remembered it because it was by that famous gardener her mother loved so much . he even snapped at me when i tried to talk to him , saying that since i did n't believe in it anyway , i would n't understand . completely bald because of their environment . 