you do n't look a day over thirty years old . '' i try and get my head together . she raised herself onto her tiptoes , yanked his head down and settled her lips on his , using a kiss to tell him what she could n't yet put into words . later , father took me into his study and , after closing the door , grinned and tapped the side of his nose . not stand there , still as stone . but instead , he just sat there on the bed , rocking slightly . 