i tell her everything i can without revealing the one final truth im not ready for her to know yet . in fact , he did n't feel anything at all . `` you might , but you will also find yourself in jail for a long time if you succeed . `` i will get them for you in secret . '' i read those papers over and over again , so often that i almost knew them by heart- '' `` what papers ? '' he gestures around me at the dorm , but i know he means all of it . 