the same crap spread in a circle around its base . hed started out gentle , treating her like glass . he made no effort to speak . besides , what 'd you think watcher was doing the whole time ? '' i float from one knot of guests to another , chatting and smiling and trying to act like i know how to be a hostess . i begged to be let out in the fields behind the town , to hide the tears that threatened to come rolling down my cheeks . now we are all here in this strange place . '' 