that 's what it 's always been to him . she came out into the garden with a plate of sandwiches . to feel him touching every part of me . but the only thing here right now from that life is me . '' i told you that the best way for me to help you and your dad is only if you tell me the truth . i pushed against his shoulders , but he stared down at me , telling me without words what i must do . in between ball games , you mean ? 