The English Roses admonishing her older provocative self. Madonna's narration was described by Ginny Dougary as "bossy". She also found parallels with the singer's childhood in "The English Roses". "Slate"s Polly Shulman found the book to be "charmless, didactic" and egoistic since she felt it revolved around Madonna and her daughter. Shulman added that ""The English Roses" is a dull little thing, though not incompetent. Madonna does understand the basic structure of storytelling—perhaps too well", with multiple cliches present while making the titular characters "so passive that they might as well be good." David Kipen of the "San Francisco Chronicle" humorously said that
The English Roses the same school in London. They live in the same neighborhood and participate in the same activities together, including attending summer picnics and ice-skating in winter. They are jealous of a girl named Binah, who lives nearby, since they believe her life is perfect. The girls detest her beauty and popularity at school. They enjoy ignoring Binah while concocting naughty plans against her. One day, the mother of one of the Roses lectures the girls about judging people on the basis of their looks. That night, as the English Roses are at a picnic sleepover, they have the same dream.