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If a grad is having a party, experts say invitations should be sent to local friends and family three to four weeks before the date. Invitations for out-of-town relatives and friends should be sent out at least six weeks in advance, and should include a map of the area along with a list of local hotel suggestions.
Proper etiquette dictates that you send out invites up to eight weeks in advance. However, that might be too far in advance for a child's birthday, so stick to two to four weeks ahead of time instead. That gives guests time to prepare and schedule so you get the best turnout. In general, the more formal an event, the farther in advance you should send out the invites.