Miss Clem'S Elephant Stew
["1 elephant", "water", "1/2 ton assorted vegetables", "2 rabbits"]
["Cut up elephant into 1-inch cubes.", "Be accurate.", "Use ruler. Place cubes in kettle containing 2,315 gallons of water.", "Simmer 3 days.", "Add assorted vegetables.", "Do not use rutabagas.", "Rutabagas hate people; that's why they taste the way they do.", "Simmer 6 more days over low heat."]
["elephant", "water", "vegetables", "rabbits"]