Potato Salad
["5 to 6 lb. potatoes", "1 onion", "5 celery ribs", "1 small block Velveeta cheese", "1 1/2 c. pickle relish", "2 c. mayonnaise", "2 c. Miracle Whip salad dressing", "3 Tbsp. mustard", "2 tsp. celery salt", "1 tsp. garlic powder", "salt to taste", "1 tsp. white pepper", "paprika for garnish"]
["Wash and boil potatoes in skins until tender.", "Drain off water and allow to cool.", "Peel and dice potatoes to desired size.", "Peel and dice onion.", "(Dab eyes with dishcloth.) Wash and dice celery. Dice Velveeta into small pieces.", "(Eat a couple of pieces.)", "Place all ingredients into a large bowl and mix thoroughly.", "If too dry, add more mayonnaise.", "Transfer all to a nice clean bowl and garnish with paprika and green olives with tail lights.", "Serves from1 to 12, depending on appetite."]
["potatoes", "onion", "celery", "Velveeta cheese", "pickle relish", "mayonnaise", "Miracle", "mustard", "celery salt", "garlic powder", "salt", "white pepper", "paprika"]