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[Assistant] Like, what they did mattered, and they started from nothing.


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[Assistant] And even if you feel like you've got nothing on your side, nothing going for you, even if you feel like your idea is stupid or your passions don't matter, that is a lie to tell yourself to go the easy route.


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[Assistant] And that's why I will tell you until the end of my days that I believe in you guys and I know that what you do matters.


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[Assistant] And your dreams matter, and your passions matter, and once you find something that you're passionate about and you burn for, you need to pursue it with a reckless abandon. Because people will tell you that you can't for as long as you're trying to do something. And they are wrong. But nothing could be more wrong than actually believing them.


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[Assistant] So just know that you guys can do whatever you wanna do. You guys can do absolutely anything.


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[Assistant] And it's not just me that needs to say it. You need to say it to yourself, but you also need to remember that you're part of this gigantic community. You need to tell your friends and family, people who are struggling trying to accomplish their goals or just get by or whatever they're doing, they need to know that you're supporting them.


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[Assistant] One of the best things to come out of this was just realizing how much the community on YouTube MEANS to people.


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[Assistant] And how much it means to people like me and other YouTubers out there who know that their communities are everything to them.


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[Assistant] And I really mean this, I really mean take some time.


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[Assistant] And tell someone you know or tell a complete stranger or tell someone else down in the comments below that what they're doing matters and that, you know, even if they don't believe in themselves right now that a complete stranger can support them and they can do anything that they want to do so long as they


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[Assistant] Don't stop believing in themselves. And that sounds like, don't stop believing in the song, nevermind. I am just completely out of it right now because I've got so many things in my mind that I wanna say.


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[Assistant] And at the end of the day, like, this may seem stupid when I go back and look at this, but I just had to get my words out and my thoughts out because I'm so ready to get back home.


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[Assistant] For other people around here, but just thank you guys so much for doing everything that you have done for me.


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[Assistant] And just remember to spread some love to everyone else in this community. Because if we have a community and a society where everyone believes in each other, just like that guy believes in me with the siren.


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[Assistant] But if we have a community that believes in each other more than they believe in themselves, we won't need to worry about people failing.


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[Assistant] Because they can keep trying, and whatever they do, and they may not succeed at the first thing, but so long as you guys don't give up, you're gonna make the world a difference.


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[Assistant] And there's someone out there who's gonna make the next big thing, and they need a push right now.


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[Assistant] But either way, just thank you guys so much for watching. Thank you guys for listening to my late night ramblings. Yes, I do have glitter everywhere. I was doing a slow-mo thing at a big party. It was a lot of fun. You'll see soon.


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[Assistant] Just thank you guys so much for being there for me and please be there for each other.


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[Assistant] Because this community is a shining beacon of hope. And that's not an exaggeration. That's not hyperbole. That's not saying something to make you feel good about yourself. Well, I hope it does, but I'm not just saying that. You guys are an amazing community.


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[Assistant] I want you guys to believe in each other as much as I believe in you.


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[Assistant] So that's about everything. That's all my thoughts for now. I'm sure I've missed something. I'm sure I've woken up neighbors at this point already just cause that's how I do. So thank you guys again so much for watching. And as always, I will see you in the next video. Bye bye!


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[Assistant] Straight out of Houston. Yeah. We're a different size of town, but you know.


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[Assistant] Respect man, go a long way. Definitely. I mean, so that's what really, you know, brought us together.


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[Assistant] With this journey, you know what I'm saying? I'm just grateful to be here on some real nitty shit.


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[Assistant] Yeah, man, uhm, so basically, you know what I'm saying? Like I said, respect go a long way. You know what I mean? Just, we just doing shit different. You know what I'm saying? Uhm, you want different results, you gotta do shit different. You know what I'm saying? That's why I use the word grateful. You know what I'm saying? Cause, uh, he actually had somewhere to be. You know what I'm saying? Today. You know what I mean? So for him to be here, this was his choice. You know what I'm saying? So, he had somewhere to be like for real, for real.


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[Assistant] You know what I'm saying? So that's what I mean by respect. You know, we kind of been rocking out for a minute, like a minute minute. We ain't really exchanged words over the years, but it was kind of...


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[Assistant] I see what's going on. It was like I said, a mutual respect.


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[Assistant] What year? That's that nigga's signature.


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[Assistant] Jaded Gray, I'm next. You know what I'm saying? I'm next. You know, I've been cooking. I ain't really got a lot to say. You know, I like to... I take a lot of notes from this man right here. I know.


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[Assistant] So I'm, I'm less on words, you know what I mean? Shout out to Y'all Rich. You know, it's a whole nother movement too, within itself. Kinda like Marathon, you know what I mean? Just some empowerment for everybody. Man, we just...


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[Assistant] It's time. You know what I'm saying? It's time. I'm firm on that.


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[Assistant] Everything was working fine until the tsunami came.


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[Assistant] 0.2% increase in lifetime. 0.2% over the course of a lifetime.


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[Assistant] So your normal risk of cancer in Japan is? Is 30%. So what is the increased cancer risk? 30.2%.


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[Assistant] So the increment is quite small. And yet the fear is quite high. Yeah, that's true.


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[Assistant] Kanata Aki means the land without frontier. Wapi, my horse. And Gretel, your horse.


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[Assistant] Hi, I'm Aurora and I, I think it's fantastic to be here with you on National Geographic Earth Day Eve. I...


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[Assistant] I especially love being here because the matter of nature and the earth is such an important cause for me. It lies so, so close to my heart. For me, nature is definitely the biggest source of


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[Assistant] Inspiration. And it's the only place I feel like I can go where no one ever asks you of anything. You can just purely exist out here, which I really really love.


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[Assistant] This forest is a forest that means a lot to me. I spent a lot of time here as a child and it's very nice to be back. I feel very at home.


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[Assistant] If I was an explorer, I would wake up, put on my hijab, put on my gear. I would take my tools to investigate.


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[Assistant] My name is Klaus Töpfer. I was honored to be the co-chair of the so-called ESSEC commission discussing the phase out of nuclear power.


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[Assistant] This report was accepted more or less unanimously in our parliament. Nearly unanimous? We don't do much of anything in the United States seeing nearly unanimous. I believe it was a clear conviction. We will have the chance to change now.


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[Assistant] And therefore we have to make it a common endeavor to prove that this is a possibility for an economically important country.


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[Assistant] Crash Team Racing. This is Crash Team Racing Nitro-Fueled. You know what I'm saying? And we're with, uh, Billy Eichner, who is a delightfully funny gentleman. That's very nice. Thank you, Colin. Seriously, I didn't mean it. Right. No, I, uhm.


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[Assistant] Billy, if this doesn't work, I will take you to a nice dinner. I would love that. By nice dinner, what does that mean to you, nice dinner?


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[Assistant] Uhm, I like a steak. Would you wanna go to a Sizzler? We could do a Sizzler. I used to, my family and I loved Sizzler when I was a kid.


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[Assistant] Okay, I'll take that guy. Okay, alright. Yeah. He's a dog with bad teeth.


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[Assistant] Now look, let's talk about it. I do want to acknowledge.


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[Assistant] That during that match, things weren't going well for you. No. And you shouted out,


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[Assistant] I think we should up this ante here. So what we're gonna do is uhm, whoever loses this next round has to, let's bring it in here, wear the head


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[Assistant] You cool with that? Yeah. Get some wumpas.


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[Assistant] Very exciting. Congratulations to Billy Eichner.


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[Assistant] And of course, Crash Team Racing Nitro Fuel is available June 21st on PlayStation 4, Xbox One, and Nintendo Switch. And yes, I have grown children. Well, should we hit the clubs? Let's do it. You look like a furry.


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[Assistant] Yes, yes, yes, oh yes, saying yes is always best.


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[Assistant] She wanted you to feel instantly uhm, what was so special for her in that landscape.


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[Assistant] People have gone out of their way to help me understand, then, you know, talk about their history, their culture.


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[Assistant] We all die. Two and a half million Americans every year.


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[Assistant] Sometimes death comes suddenly. From accidents. Heart attacks. Homicides.


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[Assistant] They are called forensic pathologists, or medical examiners, and they perform the postmortem, the autopsy, your last physical exam.


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[Assistant] Forensic pathologists like Fiero determine what caused the death.


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[Assistant] Was it natural? An accident? A homicide or a suicide?


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[Assistant] I mean, if you don't have training and what to look for, what to test for.


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[Assistant] From the world's number one best-selling crime writer. Elite death detectives like Fiero have inspired popular fiction.


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[Assistant] Chris Reynolds, a private investigator, was brought into the case by the husband's lawyer.


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[Assistant] The county sheriff ordered an autopsy to determine whether or not the death was a homicide.


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[Assistant] Autopsies in Sonoma County are handled by a private company, the Forensic Medical Group, FMG.


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[Assistant] He tracked him from Oregon where Dr. Gill lost his teaching job at a university all the way to Indianapolis where Dr. Gill got his first full-time job performing autopsies.


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[Assistant] So he hadn't been a forensic pathologist before? No. And he goes to Indianapolis. Where they let him do autopsies? Yes.


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[Assistant] These scandals led to Dr. Gill being fired, and so he headed west to a job in Los Angeles.


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[Assistant] And that's when Dr. Gill found a job doing autopsies in Northern California for the Forensic Medical Group.


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[Assistant] So they secretly began coaching him on how to answer questions about his past and about the autopsy.


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[Assistant] Once the trial began, the prosecution was forced to reveal the secret videotapes and turn them over to the defense.


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[Assistant] But the official record still lists the death as a homicide, leaving the community to wonder what really happened. Is it possible that a guilty man walked?


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[Assistant] A scathing report on the case by the California State Bar concluded that the prosecutor was guilty, among other things, of suppression of evidence about Dr. Gill.


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[Assistant] The prosecutor was suspended from practicing law for four years.


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[Assistant] The report went on to describe Dr. Gill as an incompetent pathologist. But there was no suspension for Dr. Gill


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[Assistant] He just kept on doing autopsies for the forensic medical group.


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[Assistant] The case of Dr. Gill is not unique. A nationwide investigation by Frontline, ProPublica, and NPR found there is no federal oversight of death investigators or the offices where they work.


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[Assistant] We found that in Massachusetts, they've repeatedly lost body parts.


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[Assistant] In Michigan, they discovered the body of a prominent banker and missed the bullet hole in his neck. In Nebraska, murderers went free because of incompetent autopsies.


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[Assistant] While in Mississippi, botched autopsies have helped send innocent people to prison for life.


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[Assistant] In more than 1,300 counties across the country, elected politicians called coroners are in charge of death investigation.


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[Assistant] Tim Brown graduated from a technical college and then became a building contractor in Marlborough County, South Carolina.


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[Assistant] He's also the elected coroner, which means when someone dies unexpectedly, he decides how it happened.


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[Assistant] So you got elected and you just sort of, if you will, dove into the subject. Yes, sir.


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[Assistant] Coroner Brown would find himself in the national spotlight after he got a phone call that a body had been found near the state line.


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[Assistant] If the body had been found just a few feet away, the investigation would have been handled by a fully equipped state medical examiner's office in North Carolina.


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[Assistant] But the body turned up in South Carolina, so Coroner Brown was in charge.


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[Assistant] Like most coroners, Brown does not do autopsies. He had to ship the decomposing body to a private forensic pathologist more than 100 miles away.


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[Assistant] Based on that autopsy, Brown declared the death a homicide. But he faced a dilemma.


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[Assistant] He did not have a refrigerator in which to store the decomposing body of the unknown victim. And he didn't have the funds to bury the man. And so he had the remains cremated.


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[Assistant] But the Jordan family was left with only ashes to bury, leading to a media outcry that Coroner Brown should not have cremated the body. You may do with the resources that you had.


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[Assistant] Have the qualifications changed? For being a card?


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[Assistant] Today, coroners in South Carolina have limited access to a refrigeration unit. And there's a new requirement to be a coroner. You have to have a high school diploma.


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[Assistant] I first encountered an elected coroner nearly 20 years ago when I was reporting a story in New Orleans about crime and violence in the police department.


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[Assistant] The New Orleans coroner back then was an obstetrician, Dr. Frank Mignard.


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[Assistant] Twenty years later, Dr. Jazz, as he's known, is still in office, the longest serving big city coroner in America.


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[Assistant] During Hurricane Katrina, Coroner Menard became part of the city's folklore when he swam through the storm water to get to work.


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[Assistant] Manyard's exploits helped him win re-election. You're the elected coroner. Yes. And you've been elected how many times?


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[Assistant] But it's Karnerman Yard who interprets his pathologist's findings, and he decides whether or not a death is a homicide.


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[Assistant] And some of those decisions have been very controversial. Take the case of Adolf Archie.


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[Assistant] When the police captured Archie, an ominous message came over the radio.


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[Assistant] Coroner Mignard's office performed an autopsy which found that Adolf Archie had a fractured skull, a broken rib, blood in his lungs, lacerated lips, and other injuries consistent with what happens when someone is violently beaten to death.


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[Assistant] But initially, coroner Mignard left the classification of the death blank and then said publicly that Archie had died when he fell over backwards by accident.


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[Assistant] There's been a long history where you've been accused of being biased on the side of law enforcement.


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[Assistant] To the point that you had a friend who was an officer involved in one of the more famous incidents.


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[Assistant] After an outcry over his calling Archie's death an accident, Mignard classified it a homicide. But then he continued to publicly say it was accidental.


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[Assistant] With the medical evidence in dispute, no charges were ever filed against the police officers involved.


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[Assistant] When the body of Henry Glover was found in this burned out car, evidence pointed to police officers being responsible for his death.


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[Assistant] But Coroner Mignard did not classify it as a homicide. And so there was no criminal investigation.


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[Assistant] But last year an extraordinary federal probe found that the death of Henry Glover was in fact a homicide.


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[Assistant] But we have found new cases that reveal cracks in coroner Mignard's Palace of Truth, like the case of Kane Maselli.


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[Assistant] On the morning of January 4th, 2009, here at Tulane Medical Center, 43-year-old Kane Maselli came into the emergency room, suffering from a severe asthma attack.


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[Assistant] When the staff tried to discharge her, even though she was still having trouble breathing, Kane, who had a history of psychiatric problems, resisted, and the hospital called the authorities.


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[Assistant] They took her here to the psychiatric ward of the house of detention run by the sheriff.


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[Assistant] Despite her asthma attack, prison staff put her in five-point restraints, a series of straps that bound her flat on her back, on the bed in her cell.


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[Assistant] According to the House of Detention's own records, Kane told the staff that she couldn't breathe.


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[Assistant] As she struggled, she began to get free. So four guards held her down.


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[Assistant] Only when they could no longer find a pulse were paramedics called.


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[Assistant] They rushed Cain to the hospital, and that's when her father, Mike, was notified.


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[Assistant] After Cain died, two of the doctors at the hospital asked to talk to Mike Maselli in private.


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[Assistant] Kane Maselli's body was sent to Karner Mignard's office, where they decided to do an autopsy, and assigned a veteran pathologist, Dr. Paul McGarry.


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[Assistant] He's the same person who performed the autopsy in the death of Adolf Archie and other controversial cases.


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[Assistant] In the Maselli case, Dr. McGarry noted needle marks on Kane's arm.


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[Assistant] And despite the fact that tests showed no drugs in her system,


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[Assistant] He reported to Coroner Mignard that she had died because of drug abuse.


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[Assistant] Maselli turned to veteran civil rights lawyer Mary Howell, who has been investigating deaths at the hands of the authorities in New Orleans for decades.


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[Assistant] Dr. McGarry, who has worked for Dr. Minner for many years, are his autopsies, his findings a regular problem that you run into?


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[Assistant] You know Mary Howell, right? Oh yeah. What she says is that, uh, there's a consistent series of cases, many handled by Dr. McGarry.


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[Assistant] Where second autopsies showed that there was in fact a different cause of death.


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[Assistant] But we have learned that when Coroner Menard made that statement to us, he was aware of serious flaws in Dr. McGarry's work.


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[Assistant] Mike Miscelli exposed one of those flaws by arranging for his daughter's body to be flown to Alabama, so that she could be examined by an independent forensic pathologist Miscelli hired, Dr. James Lurdson.


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[Assistant] When you discovered that in fact she had been put in five point restraint as an asthmatic, what was your reaction?


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[Assistant] In 2010, Misselli filed a lawsuit against the sheriff and his employees who were allegedly involved in Kane's death.


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[Assistant] He also sued Karnerman Yard's forensic pathologist, Dr. McGarry.


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[Assistant] With that lawsuit pending, coroner Mignard reviewed McGarry's autopsy and changed the cause of death.


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[Assistant] But the authorities in New Orleans have so far declined to pursue a criminal investigation into the death of Kane Maselli.


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[Assistant] Despite repeated attempts, Dr. McGarry refused to talk to us.


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[Assistant] Dr. McGarry, I'm Lowell Bergman. I've been trying to talk to you for a couple of days. Would you talk to us?


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[Assistant] After changing the cause of Cain Maselli's death, coroner Mignard has, after 30 years, stopped working with Dr. McGarry.


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[Assistant] In addition to the Masele, Glover, and Archie cases, there are others involving law enforcement where an independent autopsy has challenged coroner Mignard's findings.


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[Assistant] That's what people point to when they say that you're close to law enforcement. That you're, that you, because you're an elected official with some political dues to pay, you'll help law enforcement when they're in a jam.


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[Assistant] At Karner Mignard's request, we gave him a list of the other controversial cases.


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[Assistant] And then he told us they were all quote, under investigation, and he would not be able to comment on the record.


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[Assistant] If there is an autopsy performed involving law enforcement shooting somebody or in custody death.


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[Assistant] And the autopsies done by the New Orleans coroner's office and their forensic pathologist, they routinely will get a second autopsy.


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[Assistant] It was because of that perception of bias and other problems that plague death investigation nationally that Dr. Marcela Fierro joined in a recent study by the National Academy of Sciences.


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[Assistant] Your number one recommendation was abolish coroners.


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[Assistant] Dr. Ross Zumwalt of New Mexico was one of the co-authors of the study, which recommended national standards requiring that every office in the country be inspected and accredited.


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[Assistant] But coroners say that many of their offices do an exemplary job, like the one in Las Vegas.


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[Assistant] And their abilities. Murphy's office in Las Vegas was the model for CSI.


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[Assistant] It would take at least a thousand forensic pathologists to handle death investigations in this country.


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[Assistant] But the National Academy of Sciences says there are fewer than half that number practicing today.


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[Assistant] According to the National Academy study, it will take the support of the federal government to reform death investigations. Currently, the US government provides virtually no funding to either medical examiners or coroners.


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[Assistant] But because they don't have the resources, they see only a fraction of fatalities.


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[Assistant] So you still only see at most one out of three people who die in the county in a given year? Correct.


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[Assistant] And in fact, there are a lot of homicides going on you don't know about.


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[Assistant] One of the groups whose deaths are least likely to be investigated is also among the most vulnerable, the elderly.


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[Assistant] On November 6, 2007, Elmore Kittower, age 80, passed away.


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[Assistant] He had been living here at Silverado, a high-end assisted living facility in Los Angeles County.


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[Assistant] According to his death certificate, he stopped breathing. His heart failed. Natural causes. No one reported anything was amiss.


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[Assistant] Mr. Kitara was buried, but the next day his family received a phone call.


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[Assistant] The anonymous caller claimed that Mr. Kittauer had been beaten by a caregiver at Silverado and the beating resulted in his death. The only way to know if that was true was to exhume the body and perform an autopsy.


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[Assistant] Armed with the autopsy results, the district attorney subpoenaed Silverado's employees, and they revealed what the caregiver, Cesarioa, did to Mr. Kittauer.


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[Assistant] What you're describing, it sounds like...


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[Assistant] Supervisors or others must have had some idea of what was going on.


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[Assistant] On site? Yes. And you have physicians who visit, I guess, the patients.


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[Assistant] The fact that you, as you say, you have nurses and doctors and a medical director. How could people miss all the injuries to his face and so on?


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[Assistant] Mr. Kittower's death certificate did not tell his story either.


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[Assistant] That's because the doctor who signed his death certificate wasn't his physician and never saw his body. That's legal in California.


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[Assistant] Only because of that autopsy of Mr. Kittower did the truth emerge. And as a result, Mr. Eowa was convicted of torture and sentenced to life in prison.


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[Assistant] Competent death investigation not only helps catch criminals, but can save thousands of lives.


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[Assistant] Forensic pathologists identified the anthrax terrorist attack, defective cribs that kill babies, and lethal infectious diseases.


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[Assistant] Economists call medical examiners and the autopsies they do a public good, like the fire department.


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[Assistant] Because autopsies can save lives as well as solve crimes.


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[Assistant] But unlike the fire department, there's little public awareness of their value.


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[Assistant] I don't see a drumbeat of popular protest on the nature of death investigations in this country. People aren't demonstrating saying that the forensic pathologist or the coroners aren't doing their job.


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[Assistant] Remember Dr. Thomas Gill, who was coached in that murder case in Northern California, and was called an incompetent pathologist by the state bar?


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[Assistant] A year after that trial, he left Northern California to do autopsies in Kansas City, Missouri.


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[Assistant] Eventually, Dr. Gill left Kansas City.


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[Assistant] And that's when he made the most surprising move of his career.


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[Assistant] We found Dr. Gill back in Northern California, performing autopsies for the same company he was working for before, the Forensic Medical Group, or FMG.


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[Assistant] Dr. Arnold Joselson is one of the owners of FMG. You think Dr. Gill is a competent forensic pathologist? I do, yes. And you believe he performed well in Sonoma County?


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[Assistant] Did you ever look at those tapes? They're available of what was going on in that coaching, what the issues were.


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[Assistant] But you're not sure why, I'm trying to get a sense of, from what we've had people say to us is that,


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[Assistant] He not only didn't tell the truth, but he didn't really know what he was doing.


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[Assistant] At the Forensic Medical Group, do you do quality control? Does someone check your work?


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[Assistant] Some of the places you work for ask that someone check your work. Yes. But others don't.


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[Assistant] Decided that they didn't want Dr. Gill. Would you send them somebody else? Is that basically how you operate?


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[Assistant] But FMG does autopsies in 14 other counties in Northern California, and public records allowed us to find Dr. Gill performing autopsies in one of them, Yolo County, near Sacramento.


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[Assistant] Though Dr. Gill declined numerous requests for an interview, he sent us a letter saying that since he returned to California, there have been no questions about the quality of his work.


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[Assistant] In Northern California, FMG works for elected coroners, who are also the sheriffs. In Yolo County, it's Ed Prieto.


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[Assistant] Because we got the name of Dr. Gill, and he's had serious problems in all over the United States. Oh really? And in 2006, out of a case that he was involved in in Sonoma County, the state bar concluded, well they have a whole chapter here I can give it to you, it says incompetent pathologist.


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[Assistant] After that interview, Sheriff Coroner Prieto requested that FMG no longer send Dr. Gill to Yolo County.


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[Assistant] Saying that Dr. Gill no longer works for FMG, as there is not the volume of work available to support him as a full-time staff member.


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[Assistant] Just before we went to air, Dr. Gill told us he's looking for a new job.


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[Assistant] And remember Dr. Paul McGarry, the forensic pathologist in New Orleans who no longer works for Karnerman Yard?


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[Assistant] Dr. McGarry never stopped working. He's been doing autopsies for coroners in nearby Mississippi.


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[Assistant] We are in beautiful Topanga Canyon in Los Angeles, California, which I love for its wildness and for its history of music. I am joined tonight by Sam Gandel and Sam Wilkes, two of my favorite musicians to play. Love you for a long time.


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[Assistant] That was amazing! Are you like a superhero or something? What?


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[Assistant] It's just the way you move, the things you do.


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[Assistant] I like to think so. We were all students at Oxford West College.


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[Assistant] I got a scholarship. The only scholarship. Everybody else paid their way in.


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[Assistant] One thing before we go in. My friends are having a hard time coping, so go easy on them. If we can get everyone working together, we're gonna make you an amazing propeller.


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[Assistant] That's Dirk. His mom is an award-winning physicist and his dad is an astronaut. He's really good with aerodynamics. Aerodynamics? How convenient.


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[Assistant] He's also a health nut. He only drinks like the most expensive water on the planet.


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[Assistant] Trust me, once we give him what he wants, he'll help make your propeller.


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[Assistant] You did it! I mean, not that I had any doubt that you would. Wait here. Hey Dirk, I got something I think you might like. Sick!


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[Assistant] So, uh, can I get that propeller now? Soon! Dirk will certainly help, but we need to get a couple other people on board.


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[Assistant] That's Margaret. She's an engineering major with like the highest GPA in the history of the school. But she lost her dog when everything went down and she hasn't been the same since. Finding that dog will go a long way to helping her depression. Hey, whatever gets me that propeller. There's a dog park across the river that she always went to. I would check there first. Nice.


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[Assistant] Okay, we need to convince just one more person to help. Then we can start building your propeller.


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[Assistant] You guys just sit on your asses all day while this hero goes out into the city. All to get you a bunch of useless shit so you can be happy.


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[Assistant] I don't know about you, but that inspires me. Makes me wanna be a hero to this hero. I know we can do it. Together. We're gonna have to work hard.


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[Assistant] What is it? It's a 3D printer. It's gonna make you a new propeller. Oh, cool. Yea, I know. Hmm, but it needs a faster processor.


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[Assistant] Boy, Max must have really hated his parents.


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[Assistant] So this will take a few hours to finish, huh? I'll let you know when it's done.


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[Assistant] Although I didn't know Walter as well as you did, I still like to express condolences. So, condolences.


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[Assistant] Four Kim just left. She said those smoke signals at the train station could be grill creams. But I saw a bunch of scabs going after her! You gotta get up there! Wait here.


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[Assistant] Or we'll be dead. I found a hidden code buried in a fizzcode data drive. I've only decoded a small piece, but it is a massive bit of work. They are planning something huge, and to find out what, I need access to the server room in their headquarters. What? That's in their headquarters?


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[Assistant] Ten feet of water here, the boats are coming. There I am standing there, and you can see my John Wayne pistol.


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[Assistant] Ten times. Ten four-year terms. You're a politician. Oh, don't call me a politician. I don't think I'm a politician. I'm more of a community servant.


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[Assistant] Okay, look at it that way. Now look at it from my point of view. We can't say.


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[Assistant] There's no way I can say that that is a homicide. There's no way of telling how, why this man died.


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[Assistant] With my classification. And we have had battles with the police and the district attorney. And we always come out on the, on the, on the palace of truth. You got to keep that in the back of your mind. Palace of truth. The point is, the truth is what we peddle. The truth is what we peddle. And we don't care who wins and who loses.


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[Assistant] These things have a way of looking bad, like you are reporting it, you know, but, uh,


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[Assistant] Those people you talking about just now, I don't even know who they are.


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[Assistant] The problem is the powers to be are satisfied with the services that we give. When the powers to be who control the pocketbook


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[Assistant] And I want you to put this on the screen in big, bold letters. Dead people don't vote.


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[Assistant] I think you are whatever I tell you to be.


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[Assistant] My only thought about him in politics was the conspiracy theory that he not only espoused, but really forwarded about the president's birthplace.


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[Assistant] He looked at me and said, you've been very critical of me. And I mentioned, yeaah, I had.


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[Assistant] Told me I would lose in November, uh, not knowing that I wasn't up in November.


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[Assistant] That confirmed a lot of our worst fears. It was just an in your face, you know, kind of slash and burn speech. And he seemed to be continuing the campaign. And that's, that's never good.


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[Assistant] He certainly, uh, didn't seem to appreciate the difficulty.


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[Assistant] All that celebration and they come out and say, well, I really didn't like that bill. That gave a lot of senators pause. Will the president be there for us if we pass something and then it turns out it's not as popular?


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[Assistant] It was pretty high drama. I went the other way, but John felt that this was a time to take a stand. And frankly, as much as I disagreed with it, I admired it. It was classic John McCain.


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[Assistant] This was not where a president should be. This was a layup. This was easy. You know, if there's white supremacy in any form, you condemn it.


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[Assistant] This is not our party. This is not behavior that we should condone. We shouldn't be okay with this. This is not normal.


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[Assistant] Uh, with a lot of the Republican base that, uh,


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[Assistant] That he represented more of their feelings than I did.


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[Assistant] It was tough. It was, it was very tough because we've stood together on a lot of these things and a lot of the resistance to some of the moves and the behavior of the president. So that was a very difficult thing to do.


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[Assistant] In the case of the Republican Party, those things also threaten to turn us into a fearful, backward looking minority party.


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[Assistant] Okay, okay, okay, back off, back off. Go over there, go over there. God damn, Grinch's sperm.


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[Assistant] Donald Trump was in a different league in terms of being able to demonstrate anger.


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[Assistant] He was more angry than anybody by multiples.


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[Assistant] A lot of folks probably thought, hey, you know what, that guy will go to Washington, will take Washington by the lapels, shake it up, and then return it back to what we need it to be doing.


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[Assistant] Ms. McConnell's the master. You know, I mean, he understands the rhythm of the Senate. Uhm, he has been in that body and in elected politics for a very long time, so understands how to get something done in a legislative arena.


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[Assistant] But mom, first we gotta say yes! Hahaha, okay, okay.


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[Assistant] The bill's rolled out, no real hearings with actual witnesses, no amendments get offered until it gets to rules committee and you're told take it or leave it. That's not how you're supposed to do things. So, we push back against that.


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[Assistant] But because he produced this sample, he could already be manufacturing at an industrial scale.


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[Assistant] Keep in mind, this is basically two years to the month after President Trump had criticized McCain's POW status and suggested he was not a hero because he was captured.


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[Assistant] He calls McConnell and they get into a screaming match and Mitch McConnell rarely raises his voice. But Trump is using all manner of expletives to criticize Mitch McConnell and McConnell is giving it back to the president. It's extraordinary.


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[Assistant] But that's not what he wants to do. It's not his impulse, but he has to say something.


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[Assistant] They finally passed the tax cut bill. The last pick is up Donald Trump and more because the Republicans recognized we've got to have an accomplishment next year. We can't go into the midterms with nothing to run on besides whatever the latest Donald Trump controversy is. And so they cobbled together a coalition.


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[Assistant] You can thank Congress, the same people that can't even give us aged care.


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[Assistant] Senator Mitch McConnell said I had excessive expectations, but I don't think so. After seven years of hearing repeal and replace, why not done?


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[Assistant] Can you believe that Mitch McConnell who has screamed repeal and replace for seven years couldn't


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[Assistant] I would fully expect Porker to be a negative voice and stand in the way of our great agenda. Didn't have the guts to run.


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[Assistant] Bob Corker, who helped President Oh give us the bad Iran deal and couldn't get elected dog catcher in Tennessee.


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[Assistant] Yes. But this gun isn't ours. This... Who sent it from Korea?


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[Assistant] She was scared, so she fired.


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[Assistant] Sonali's coach Sodi gave us an offer.


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[Assistant] Okay.


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[Assistant] So, uh,


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[Assistant] Aaj kal aaj kal karta rha, lekin paise wapas nahi ki. Ik saal ho gaya.


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[Assistant] Actually,


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[Assistant] So, uh,


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[Assistant] Sodi ji ki moth unke orange juice me mili hui arsenic se hui. Yani ki zeh hai. Death due to poison.


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[Assistant] Mr. President, I have to say that you're living up to every, everything I thought you would. You're one heck of a leader, and we're all benefiting from it.


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[Assistant] And we're going to make this the greatest presidency that we've seen, not only in generations, but maybe ever. God bless all of you.


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[Assistant] We can't have mad men out there shooting rockets all over the place.


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[Assistant] I just put out a, uh, a feeler because I don't know where he is right now. He may not be in North Korea, but I said to Chairman Kim would want to meet. I'll be at the border. It's certainly, uh, we seem to get along very well.


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[Assistant] Yep, that's me. You're probably wondering how I ended up in this situation.


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[Assistant] Hey! What is going on here? Listen, I've had a long day. Please don't give me a hard time.


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[Assistant] Hey, Lixiao, aren't you hungry?


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[Assistant] We have to cook for our son every meal time or he'll go hungry. This is why he's always rushing to the neighbor because he's hungry.


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[Assistant] Hey, child. I'm here to get my boy. Shhh. He's sleeping. Oh, he's sleeping?


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[Assistant] Hey Chow, I know that ever since our arrival, we've been causing you trouble. Thank you.


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[Assistant] Uh, have you heard about my family problems?


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[Assistant] I know what they're doing. I'm a police officer.


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[Assistant] The worst they can do is talk about you and your problems. In one ear out the other, then on to the next story. That I understand.


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[Assistant] Now I know why Lingxiao always comes down here to eat. These are the best pickles in the whole city. So good.


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[Assistant] Do you feel like being in the music industry that you've kind of, like you almost like moving around so fast and being around so many people you sometimes feel like it can be kind of hard to like keep track of like who you are, the simple things in life because of the fast pace?


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[Assistant] Can we go back in time? Can you tell me a little bit about who you were before you became-


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[Assistant] But did you, did you, were you already smart enough to know that you should be dealing with rich dudes?


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[Assistant] Nah, now it's even better. Wow, look at that. Uhm, okay, but was that, was that hard for you to get used to in the early stages of the relationship is just being around a rapper who lives the rapper life. He's around girls all the time.


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[Assistant] Does that mean a lot to you, just knowing that there's a lot of young black girls looking at you, like, really looking up to you?


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[Assistant] Were you surprised when I got that young thug interview backstage that, uh,


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[Assistant] You know what's dope about, and what I kinda realized during the interview is that he's so raw and so incapable of holding back on anything that's going through his head that he ends up saying shit that the media then takes out of context. Oh, they love it. With the Lil Nas thing.


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[Assistant] I don't think you should have done that, but what he was actually saying about, about coming out of the closet. Thug was saying, I don't think you should have done that because I know how people are gonna judge him and what they're gonna say or whatever and then immediately-


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[Assistant] Does it freak you out when you hear about something like the city girls getting sprayed up?


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[Assistant] Right. Why? Just cause if they get on the song with you, they think he's gonna get mad?


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[Assistant] But do you think that's what he wanted in that moment? He was like, I gotta get her out of my hair. I'm gonna have her super act.


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[Assistant] But is it hard for you as somebody who loves him to see him getting too fucked up at times?


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[Assistant] Tell me if I'm wrong, I heard that Thug wouldn't go to Europe for a long time because he couldn't get his drink out there.


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[Assistant] I mean, they romanticized it. They made it into a whole thing. He's kind of a legend for that, you know?


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[Assistant] Thug is such a studio rat, he's constantly in the studio and stuff, but you're the girlfriend, and I know like for my girlfriend, I'm in here doing interviews, I'm doing, I'm working all the time, my girl has to like, kinda like, convince me or force me to like, take time off to just go get dinner with her, to like, go to the movies, shit like that. Are you comfortable with pitching that at times, or how does that go?


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[Assistant] I remember the first time I heard Cardi B make stripping sound like some gangster shit in a lyric, I was just like, oh my god, the game is different now.


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[Assistant] Definitely. Yo, let me ask you this, if you, like, you know, cause I had to like put a lot of thought in like a half hour period into what I was gonna ask Thug in that interview, what do you think is the most interesting shit about him that people don't know that if you were the interviewer, you would want him to get talking about?


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[Assistant] Definitely. I couldn't see thug just showing up to a love and hip hop filming thing.


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[Assistant] Have you ever seen it get awkward when you told somebody that he actually works with that their shit sucked on a song?


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[Assistant] You, at this point, have you decided that you're not gonna break up on social media anymore when you guys are going through it?


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[Assistant] Can I ask you about a really legendary Twitter exchange that you guys had?


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[Assistant] Uhm, so, do you have any idea when we could look out for you to be dropping some music or project?


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[Assistant] That must be crazy for you to see gonna get so big because that's kinda like-


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[Assistant] That's the kind of girl that you are that you could just not be feeling the video girl, so you'd make like a video that's been a hundred racks on.


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[Assistant] Is it weird for you to be dating somebody that is like so into clothes and that might maybe even more than you?


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[Assistant] Where does all this shit go once you guys wear it? Since you wear everything like one time.


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[Assistant] That's crazy. Hey, this has been a great interview.


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[Assistant] This gives people a roadmap to go on of who the real you is, which is the best thing you can say.


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[Assistant] Facts, No Jumper, coolest podcast in the world. Check us out on YouTube, Soundcloud, iTunes, No Jumper Weed, in store soon. Like, comment and subscribe. Appreciate y'all.


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[Assistant] The years we have left no stone unturned on the entire planet. And still, no sign of the ladybug or the cat miraculous.


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[Assistant] Only a miraculous can lead the way to another miraculous.


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[Assistant] I'll make it so that the miraculous come to me!


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[Assistant] Yeah, these people did NOTHING for you!


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[Assistant] I'm a female. I'm missing the profile of a female.


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[Assistant] Yes. I started falling in love with him. Not for intercourse or whatever it is, but you know, I thought for him.


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[Assistant] Michael is a kind hearted. I think Michael has been too good to me.


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[Assistant] This video will play when you answer the call.


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[Assistant] Yeah, you got the money?


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[Assistant] What? We're gonna throw down? What kind of grade school shit is this, huh? I work my ass off all day, so fuck off and grow up.


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[Assistant] It's time to take a little initiative. We gotta prove ourselves to Winston and the sun on ye, or we'll never move up. Is there anything going down in the next few days?


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[Assistant] Shit, yeah there is! Dog Eyes has a big shipment of stolen goods coming in! Well that's good for Dog Eyes, but that might be too much for Too Fast. Last thing I need right now is taking a sticky red pole up my ass.


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[Assistant] Well we won't unless you fuck it up. Come on, get in.


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[Assistant] A relationship. I wouldn't really work with my life right now. Sure I could.


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[Assistant] Don't worry, take it from here. You sure you don't want me to stick around?


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[Assistant] Look, I'll go talk to Benny, make him see reason.


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[Assistant] That's good. So uh, who does he rely on for protection?


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[Assistant] I think you should leave. He wants you to know that dogeyes isn't your problem anymore. If he gives you any trouble, you let Winston know and I'll take care of it. Personally. You heard that man. Get the fu-


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[Assistant] Relax, Benny. I'm not gonna kill you. Okay. Just listen. Okay. What do you want? Just what I said. Winston wants to be your friend.


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[Assistant] And what about Dark Eyes? Not your problem. I hope you're right. For my sake, can I go now?


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[Assistant] You're late. Conroy's still watching. He's got it real hard on.


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[Assistant] Alright, how are you doing?


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[Assistant] You're a cop. I'm an undercover cop. The rules are different. And you're fucking concerned about me? You are an officer of the law way. Same as me. We are not the same. You understand? We done?


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[Assistant] You're gonna take over Popstar's whole ketamine racket now. No more scraps for you. You supply the whole city with drugs. You and Dog Eyes. Popstar's gone, but you're still dealing, aren't you? So who's supplying you?


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[Assistant] So coming back didn't change much. Are you ready to confront them now? Yes. I think so.


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[Assistant] But there's no way Dog Eyes walks away from this. So burn the warehouse, but take Sue while alive. Put him to work for you, and give the chairman a bigger cut than he was getting from Dog Eyes. Okay. Okay, okay, do it. Bring him alive. Right boss.


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[Assistant] You're good with your hands, Shan. Let's see what you can do without iron. Look, hold on. We shouldn't go in shooting anyway. There'll be workers in there. And we need Su while alive. He's worth the fortune. Oh, we're going in.


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[Assistant] What was I supposed to do, huh? Just what you did. Look, you can't back down from that asshole.


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[Assistant] Winston, we can't just walk in there, not if it's as bad as you say.


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[Assistant] Ricky. Your name's Ricky, right? I appreciate the offer. You know, let me think about it and I'll get back to you.


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[Assistant] Hey, Roland Ho? Who's asking? My name's Wei Shen. Ah, Wei. You got friends in high place?


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[Assistant] Thanks for the advice, old timer. So uhm, when can we get to work? Okay, big man.


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[Assistant] That's the problem. You old guy like rolling home money, you gotta pay.


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[Assistant] I don't care if you're sorry, I care if you have the money.


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[Assistant] No, next best thing though, got a car loaded with dope.


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[Assistant] You at least, you at least could have turned Sue all over to us. It would have helped our case. And we would have put the entire operation at risk. What does Pendrew say?


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[Assistant] You know, he's not your handle, Ray. I am. Well then fucking handle it, Raymond! Well how'd you think this was gonna go down? Huh?


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[Assistant] Whatever it takes, you remember that? You wanted results, and you can't get them sitting behind a desk, nose in a rule book, with a stick up your ass.


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[Assistant] But before you go back to your office to try and pull the plug, go ahead and tell Pendu that I just met the chairman of the Sun An Yi. Chairman?


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[Assistant] Wait, you're, you're just a foot soldier. Well this foot soldier has just been marked for promotion. Because I made sure Siwa got out safely.


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[Assistant] It'll be in my report, and maybe this time you'll actually read it.


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[Assistant] I found one of your statue. A sheep? This is good. I understand your sister passed. She was an addict. She couldn't kick it. It's not a very interesting story. I suppose. Though in light of that, your chosen career is rather interesting. To me anyway.


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[Assistant] Knowing who you are. You asked me once not to lie to you.


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[Assistant] And I think in return, you shouldn't ask me about my career. Fair enough.


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[Assistant] Oh, Uncle Paul! Welcome! My guest of honor!


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[Assistant] Get close to- Open your eyes, Raymond. I am Winston now.


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[Assistant] With him gone, I'll be taking his place. You want the chairman? I report to him now. You want the redpolls? I'm one of them!


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[Assistant] You wanna give up the best undercover HKPD has ever had? Your best shot taking down the Sun on Yi?


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[Assistant] I know it's no consolation, but I gotta look at one of the gunmen from the wedding. Now I will find him, and I'll make him tell me who's responsible.


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[Assistant] I need an outsider for a couple things. You got Johnny Rapface's number?


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[Assistant] Right now, we gotta stick together. We just can't let the 18K get away with this!


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[Assistant] It doesn't make sense that they would do something this big. Who do you think it was? I don't know, but I'm gonna find out.


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[Assistant] That's an interesting proposition. But I have a counter offer for Mr. Lee. I'd appreciate it if you relay this back to him word for word. Can you do that? You tell Mr. Lee


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[Assistant] Calm down. Give me the bike, I'll get you your money. What are you gonna do? Same thing I always do, Jackie.


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[Assistant] What do you want? My friend Jackie tells me you owe him some money. You're sitting on it. And why do you get off strong-arming me, huh? I know you're a cop. And I know you're a snitch. You wanna see who your boys kill first? Fuck you. Kill him! Kill him!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's going on? Duke, get down to the docks. I'm gonna need a pick up now.


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[Assistant] I'm on my way over. We got an errand to run. See you in a few minutes.


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[Assistant] Oh, don't worry about it, my man. It'll be your turn soon. Jackie, they're making me a red pole.


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[Assistant] Calm down. Look, it'll wear off, okay? Is it done? It's done. Good.


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[Assistant] I've read about him. I mean, he reps entertainers, dabbles in porn with allegedly some human trafficking mixed in. Why go after him?


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[Assistant] Not a fucking idiot, okay? He's part of my cover. He brought me in. He's the one who vouched for me.


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[Assistant] Taking him in accomplishes nothing. And it makes my job harder. I'm not doing it. You don't have a choice. Alright? It's a direct order. Yeah?


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[Assistant] Direct order? Well that's an order you can shove directly up your ass, Raven.


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[Assistant] You sure you wanna do this? Maybe you should take a few days off. You don't look so good.


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[Assistant] I wouldn't leave you, Jackie. I know. Just, damn way. No matter what happens, Jackie, I won't leave you behind. I'll always come back for you.


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[Assistant] You sure you don't wanna fuck a little before you start? There's no problem at all. I'll just have a swing by your hotel on the way to the studio.


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[Assistant] Ah, you don't know what you're missing. This baby will fuck you in a way your wife never could. Sonny, this is Wei. Wei?


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[Assistant] The infamous Sonny Wu. That's me. Infamous and notorious. Glad you could come by. Ricky's told me all about you.


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[Assistant] This is King. It was good. He's producing Vivienne Lu's next big hit.


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[Assistant] Wait, here's the real deal. A bona fide triad killer from the streets. Cleavers, guns, castrations, whatever you want. Wait.


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[Assistant] Haha, I'm glad you said it first. Buddy does good business, makes everyone a lot of money. But as far as his personality goes, I dunno.


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[Assistant] I don't mind you fucking her is one of the perks, but she has to understand the consequences if she disappoints me. Are we clear? Of course, Sonny. You're not getting attached, are you? Man of your caliber? You don't need to worry about that. I hope not. Wei, come in! Have a drink! You ever fuck some famous pussy, Wei?


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[Assistant] It's a trip, man, let me tell you. You drive by one of those billboards the size of a building, and you tell yourself, I'm going to her place, bend her over the table, and mmm! And then you do it! There's no other feeling like it!


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[Assistant] Let Wei do it. You and I have more business to discuss. How about it, Wei? Think you can handle a smokin' hot starlet for the day? Uh, sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Take my car. You take good care of my little starlet. Go ahead and fuck her g-


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[Assistant] Wait! How'd the date with Vivian go? You wanna be her new boyfriend?


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[Assistant] Relax, Ricky. I'm just making a joke. So wait. You know Fifi Miao? You mean the movie?


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[Assistant] She's doing another movie in the Stripper Assassin franchise, but I want the role for Vivian. That's a great idea. That would be huge for Vivian.


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[Assistant] Oh yea, we've crossed paths. Good.


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[Assistant] Here's the address. There's a box of stuff over by the elevator.


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[Assistant] Fuck your orders and fuck you too, Penju! I came on to take down the Sun on Yi, not to shuffle the deck! Shen...


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[Assistant] Listen Ricky, you have to choose. If you back Sunny, Lee will probably ask you to kill her yourself. Or you can get her out of here, keep her safe, and Sunny stays in jail. Okay, but what about Big Smile Lee? You let me worry about Lee.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You got a lot of nerve after that shit Pedro pulled at the funeral. What, he sends you to finish the job? Pedro doesn't know I'm here, alright? I'm completely


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[Assistant] Tell me and I might let you live, you stupid fucker.


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[Assistant] So what do you wanna do now, Jackie? The election's tomorrow, and we wanna check out the bill to make sure that Big Smile Lee isn't planning any surprises. But we got some time to kill.


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[Assistant] Alright, do anything stupid.


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[Assistant] Did I? Well Pendru, I guess everyone gets what he deserves. Including you. You ready for life in prison? What? Because all your old buddies are gonna be waiting for you. I made sure they found out what you did to Uncle Po.


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[Assistant] Oh, prosperity, huh?


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[Assistant] Ah, sorry. So, ten guys, huh? You feel us? That's just crazy. Try capable. We'll see.


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[Assistant] The night market is mine, dog eyes. You got COI in the warehouse. That was the deal. So stay the fuck.


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[Assistant] You make sure people understand that I'm in control, not dogeyes. Got it? Got it boss, no problem. And you fuck up anybody who tries to get in your way.


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[Assistant] Let the bust thing go. Good. We can fight, huh? Yeaah.


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[Assistant] Hey, don't try that shit. You got something to say, talk! Alf, you can't go on. It's too easy.


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[Assistant] You did good. Here, a little token of my respect. Keep this up and there's a lot more. I get the feeling things are looking up for the Water Street boys. Thanks, boss.


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[Assistant] Wei, you're coming with me. Looks like you're gonna meet Uncle Po. The rest of you, wait here. Don't do anything until you hear from me. What's going on? You are staying here like I told you. And you are shutting the fuck up. Got it?


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[Assistant] Your concern's really moving. I appreciate that. I'm suddenly realizing I should have never dropped out of art school. I could have made it. I could have been a real somebody. Thank you for showing me the light, officer.


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[Assistant] Yeah, originally, but, you know, I was in the States for a long time.


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[Assistant] Sure, I'll take it. That's it? That's uh, that's your big problem.


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[Assistant] Bad enough if I went out with a Chinese American girl, but, but a whitey?


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[Assistant] Thanks, but, but I'm not looking for anything serious right now. I wouldn't want it to reflect poorly on you.


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[Assistant] Finally asked her out, huh? How'd it go?


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[Assistant] Well, well, well. Look who decided to join us. Yes, good to see you. Come on in.


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[Assistant] I'm sun on ye, motherfucker. Now get outta here before I break every bone in your body.


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[Assistant] Well I expect you girls to make sure King never makes that mistake again.


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[Assistant] Well I could swing that for you. I still got contact stateside who could set up the other side of things.


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[Assistant] Aren't you going with Vivienne to the release party? Yeah, you're right. Good call. We're releasing the track that King produced tonight.


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[Assistant] You look beyond beautiful tonight. Every time I looked at you, all I could think was, I can't believe she's real.


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[Assistant] Salty, this is Wei. I need a boat and I need a gun. Can you meet me in Kennedy Town? It's Salty.


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[Assistant] Prince Philip was basically a man. And he was a big man. And he was a man's man too.


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[Assistant] Elizabeth and her younger sister Margaret were always very close as children, but both of them knew that in the end, Elizabeth would be on the throne.


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[Assistant] And Princess Margaret would need to find a role for herself.


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[Assistant] The Queen would have been told by advisors that it was not on. Very painful for all concerned.


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[Assistant] And handed to the Speaker, a message from His Majesty the King.


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[Assistant] I don't need your sentence, Wade. Yes you do. I do need your sentence, I guess, whatever.


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[Assistant] As a result of the occurrences over the course of the past several months and the pushing of the self-destruct button by the monarchy, uh, that we could now be witnessing the end of the monarchy and the reigning Queen could possibly be the last.


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[Assistant] Just to confirm the news that Diana, Princess of Wales, has died in a car accident in Paris, which also killed her companion. Dirty fired.


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[Assistant] No one bothered telling me any of your kind suffice.


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[Assistant] Do I really have to tell everyone how you grabbed onto my leg sobbing like a schoolboy?


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[Assistant] Let the real Santa take care of the presents. Now let's go!


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[Assistant] I didn't know the in-flight service was exclusive to fat Italians.


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[Assistant] They're behaving quite well. They found plenty of playmates here.


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[Assistant] Suffering at the hands of the Queen's trumped-up troops. Hit one, huh? Enough riddles! How can you see me? Because we're both in Purgatoria, you see.


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[Assistant] More tricks, little magician. Maybe you've got more to offer than I expected. For the time being though, stay here and don't get frisky.


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[Assistant] What can I say? I took a liking to one of the locals.


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[Assistant] I got nothing else to say, love. The remembrance of time.


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[Assistant] What's that you're looking at? Right, let's go. I've got a party and I've no intention of being late.


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[Assistant] Oh, and I was wrong about our final destinations. Going down.


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[Assistant] She and I have a special relationship.


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[Assistant] I think my friends and I might have had a falling out.


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[Assistant] Are you sure? Heh. Not really. Not really, huh? But you're right. This is it. Call it a woman's intuition. Women's intuition? What kind of silly comic book shit is that? You still don't know a thing about me.


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[Assistant] Listen, I don't remember a thing. Nothing.


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[Assistant] See? Risking everything for nothing. Told you I knew someone just like that.


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[Assistant] Whatever your friend did to get on the other side of these. Let's just say she's not having a good day. No, she isn't little one.


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[Assistant] Well, she doesn't seem like such a bad friend after all.


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[Assistant] I suppose you're right. I think I've done my job here. Time for me to hit the road, love. Thanks for doing all. The world is dark and full of terrors. No place to be alone. What do you want about love? You should be happy I helped you this long. Now I have to get to Thimbleventer. No, you will stay right here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, great plan, love. You can't be on your own, so let's go into the depths of hell. You'll save your friend. I'm out of here. I said no.


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[Assistant] Baldur! This war is not your doing.


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[Assistant] Are you still going to forgive me my trespasses now?


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[Assistant] I don't know what you did to piss her off, but whatever it was, nice.


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[Assistant] I know. Just go home. And no stopping or turning around along the way.


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[Assistant] So that's how that works. Well, not very romantic.


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[Assistant] We must defend it with all our strength.


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[Assistant] The eyes of the world. What? The other me escaped to the future and I can't let him have them.


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[Assistant] But there's not a moment to explain. We need to get to the sacred mountain now.


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[Assistant] But it's where the god who created the eyes of the world once lived. And now someone is after that power.


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[Assistant] Uhm, it's, uh, just the name I heard that witch, the one you called Rosa, call out to you. Anyway, this should get us to Fimbulbenter at mock speed.


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[Assistant] You've destroyed more than you know


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[Assistant] I'll come back to this world someday. So if you're lucky, maybe we'll meet again, love.


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[Assistant] Little one, I- I'm not little. And I have a name. It's Asir- I mean, my name is Loki. And I think you can quit treating me like a kid now. Then I'll call you by your name when I see you again. As a man.


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[Assistant] Hey. Who are you? And why did Hai Tao kick you out?


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[Assistant] Oh, really now? What's your last name? Oh, it's Chao.


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[Assistant] What's the matter? I'm exhausted


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[Assistant] Hm? Shell's not taking you to drawing class?


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[Assistant] I thought Cho Hwa Gwang made your brother too afraid to go out.


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[Assistant] Mr. Hwang called me up. He asked me to let Sang Tum borrow my class notes.


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[Assistant] She'll be absent again next week, but she's not even done with this week's assignments.


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[Assistant] I don't care what happens to her, but I have to do what Mr. Huang asked me to do. Let's go. She's catching the afternoon flight. Can he skip this one? Come on, come on, come on. Hurry up. Get up.


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[Assistant] So horrible. It's so hot today. We're doing her a favor, and she wouldn't let us in. Not even a cold drink.


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[Assistant] You were packing your bags? So you left us here to bake under the heat of the sun?


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[Assistant] Then why didn't you just call the guardhouse? We could've just walked up to your place!


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[Assistant] Alright, I feel better. I think I got mad because while we were baking, I realized that she was making you suffer too.


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[Assistant] Uh, Mr. Huang, my throat's really sore.


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[Assistant] So, our fates and our paths cross once again.


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[Assistant] The name Nereen is derived from the Nereids, or Cenybs. Quite appropriate for this city.


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[Assistant] Look, I know you got nothing but secrets. Hell, that goes for anyone, right?


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[Assistant] Don't act dumb with me. You know the story better than anyone.


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[Assistant] The Umbra Witches and the Lumen Sages. Two clans that wielded incredible power just 500 years ago.


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[Assistant] Plans of the Overseer, watching over us all with the eyes of the world. The power to govern light and darkness. But now I know that there really was an Overseer.


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[Assistant] And this overseer is the one who created the eyes of the world for humanity. The same ones that the clans held onto so hard. The overseer was the true creator. The true god of the human realm. The god of chaos.


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[Assistant] From what my research has told me, that God used to live right here in Noah 2.


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[Assistant] That's why this place has gateways to each realm of the Trinity of realities.


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[Assistant] The doorway to heaven, and la porta del inferno. The real gates of hell.


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[Assistant] Listen, I heard about John.


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[Assistant] Some squirrels get all the nuts. You're a lucky little fella, huh? Never took you for an animal lover, Bayonetta.


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[Assistant] So he's your little tour guide, huh? Look, I know this isn't the time to chat. Let me see what I can find out to help you.


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[Assistant] Don't you worry about my nose. I can smell trouble when I see it. You just take care of yourself.


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[Assistant] What the hell was that? Kids these days.


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[Assistant] I didn't go through all these ridiculous ordeals to just randomly show up in opportune places, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But more importantly, I'm investigating an old Noatun story, known as The Legend of Aesir.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Actually this might have something to do with you, Bayonetta. You don't say. The legend of Aesir. A legend from the dawn of time. Nobody knows where the world came from.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A struggle caused the trinity of realities to be split into three realms. Light, darkness, and chaos. Obviously our world was the one born from chaos. The three worlds all needed rulers. Most of all, ours. And the one that ruled the chaos became known as Aesir.


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[Assistant] Aesir spent the first eternity quietly looking upon the earth from his holy mountain.


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[Assistant] Where we only see reality and make it match our rules of the world. Aesir saw through reality. And those visions became our world. These observations became Aesir's power.


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[Assistant] Asir's eyes were truly the eyes that created the world. However,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Aesir pitied the humans for their naivete and lack of free will.


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[Assistant] So the power he wielded was split into two equal halves and entrusted each to humanity's instincts. The right eye of light and the left eye of darkness. By dividing the power of the eyes of Aesir, humans gained free will. They could now choose. With control of the eyes of the world, the eyes that determine destiny, humans could choose their own paths. They awoke to their own identities.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man is but a reed. The most feeble thing in nature, but now we were thinking reeds.


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[Assistant] However, the influence of the right eye, the one controlled by the sages,


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[Assistant] Left this world forever with the death of the final sage.


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[Assistant] Do the natural disasters that are occurring right now have something to do with the loss of the right eye? And what will happen to our planet? Those are the truths I'm after. And the truth will always be the truth. So if the truth is here, then so am I. And I think the key to that truth is that mountain, Thimbleventer.


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[Assistant] I've done my homework. Would you expect anything less from...


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[Assistant] If I got it right, then this gate should lead to...


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[Assistant] Girls passing out in front of me I'm used to. But this? This is unbelievable.


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[Assistant] Well, I guess it beats addicting toddlers to lollipops.


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[Assistant] Whoa, hold on for a second, kid. What happens to the world if you-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's not it, Mr. Hwang. I'm here to ask for a leave from school for Tang San.


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[Assistant] Yes, Tang San has an offer to film a commercial ad. We're going to Shanghai on Friday.


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[Assistant] Holy child, you're just lazy and playful.


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[Assistant] A beautiful life is better than a pretty face. Don't be like her.


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[Assistant] Last time I told you to ask Li Zhenzhen's brother for dinner. Did you tell her about it? I did. They said I'll come.


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[Assistant] In this regard, you are the exact replica of your father. You have the same look and the same tone. Barely any idea of your own. You always say it's not too bad. Other designs?


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[Assistant] I have a Tamagotchi. I forgot he needs to be cared for.


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[Assistant] Yeah, you need to run from your dad. We're not on our A game.


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[Assistant] We've been able to talk about a lot of things and make some...


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[Assistant] You know, good decisions together on, on a lot of, you know, on everything. But this one's been, we've talked about and we both have similar feelings on


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[Assistant] Different ways, but I don't know if it's because we're just not, it's not, you know, it's just hard to finalize that decision.


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[Assistant] Doesn't see. Doesn't make, uh.


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[Assistant] Noises are crying unless he's having seizures. But he just has a...


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[Assistant] This just overwhelming presence for us. And I know he feels, I know that he feels loved. You know? And...


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[Assistant] He's just such a, a big person, you know, in this small broken body, so.


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[Assistant] Some folks in my family, when he was going through some of the harder times, well why, you still get the question, well why hasn't he, why isn't he eating? And my answer is because he's dying.


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[Assistant] I was happy we had carried Anthony. That meant a lot to me.


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[Assistant] You know, I never thought this day would come. You know, both your grandparents and your father and I


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[Assistant] I've gotta stop acting like a clown.


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[Assistant] Hey guys, how's it going? I was racking my brain trying to come up with a special way to make this video se- say how I really feel and it was- it was really hard this time because-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I-I usually take the old vlogs that I've done in the past and I-I throw them into Premiere and I start cutting them up and watching through them, but this time I took every single vlog I've ever done along with some other videos that I've done with other people and I-and I threw them into Premiere and I'll actually show you, uh, it right now and it's, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was really hard for me this time and I've actually tried to make this video that you're seeing right now multiple times because


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I look back at the things that I've done and how long I've been doing this and in the grand scheme of my life, it's not that long. I've been on YouTube less than three years, but I see these videos and it astonishes me that my entire career on YouTube can be compressed


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] into just a few videos that you guys can see, a little montage of my life and as I grow older, but what's even more amazing is that when I see these videos and when I see myself in the past,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And people will see it and they won't even know like me at all and they'll see these things that I've left here and


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[Assistant] It's just a weird feeling to know that I've been trying to say thank you for so long and I've been trying to show you guys for so long that I, I, I, I had so much fun doing these things with these people who gave me these opportunities to


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It got really complicated really quickly, and I'm not saying that's a bad thing, but it- it's- I- I sometimes need to take a moment to remember that I'm- I'm this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I'm so grateful for the things that I've been able to do and I'm so grateful for everything that I've been able to accomplish in my endeavor to be a better person and in my endeavor to see the things that people have done for me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And how people have been eager to meet me and people have been so eager to like tell me how great I am when in reality I'm just a guy from Ohio.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Liked to make videos, and, you know, I kinda had a knack for it, and then people caught on, but, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It still amazes me every day that so many people are willing to dedicate their time to me and the cool things that I've been able to do. And I've been able to have so much fun with it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And we've been able to do so much good with it, and I know I'm getting off topic and I'm rambling and I was actually supposed to talk about the videos that you're seeing right now, but it's just, it's, it's a strange time warp to go forward in time and see the things that I've been able to do, but what I'm really trying to say is that I...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm so thankful for you guys giving me the opportunity to come out here and meet these cool people and work with it, but I always want to be able to look back at the things that I've done and remember how far I've come and remember the milestones that I've crossed and remember


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[Assistant] You know, lost at one point or another because like the strangest thing is that...


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[Assistant] I've gotten letters and emails, emails mostly, no, I don't get letters anymore, but I've gotten emails from people who are telling me about fans that were, like, at the start of my channel. There are some fans that watched me in the very beginning that, that aren't here anymore.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It just emphasizes how much I need to try.


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[Assistant] You know, every day. To make not only my videos better, but ensure that we as a community do more for...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My dad could see how, what I've done, and I wish.


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[Assistant] You know, I'm happier than I've ever been because I have a purpose and I have


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[Assistant] Like a way to go and I've been thrust into the leadership position of 5 million people and I could very easily just sit back and keep making, you know, the silly videos without actually connecting with you guys and without actually telling you guys what it means to me. And what it means to me is that


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm so happy to dedicate my life to entertaining you guys and not only that but leading you guys to try to inspire the world around you and you've done it in droves and you've done it over and over here and I'm a mess right now but so I'll wrap this up quickly just


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thank you guys so much for believing in me and understanding that uhm, I'm not just a face on the internet, uhm, I'm a real person and I'm a real person that wants to connect with 5 million people even though that's literally impossible but,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Through the magic of the internet, it is. So, just thank you guys so much for 5 million subscribers, and I know we're gonna hit another milestone down the road, and I know I'm gonna turn into a blubbering fool again because-


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[Assistant] It gets worse every time, because there's more to look back on, there's more things to remember, and there's more times in my life to be proud of.


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[Assistant] So just thank you guys so much for everything that you've done for me. Continue to be a great inspiration for the community and the world and everyone else and you guys are truly just...


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[Assistant] So thank you everybody so much for watching. I'm gonna keep making videos on YouTube for as long as I'm able. Which is hopefully a long time. So thanks again. And as always, I will see you in the next video. Bye bye!


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[Assistant] Now it's three on one! Huh, thanks a lot guys. Okay, bring it on!


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[Assistant] I gotta get to Air Temple Island. Maybe Tenzin can help me figure out what's going on.


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[Assistant] My mom's gone. Why are the cheat lockers still here?


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[Assistant] Okay, which way to Air Temple Island? I should ask someone on that street for help.


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[Assistant] I need your help. Hello?


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[Assistant] You could say that. And I think they're following me.


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[Assistant] Uh oh, no time to talk. I guess I'll have to look while I'm dealing with these guys.


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[Assistant] Gotta make sure the temple is okay. Tenzin will blame me if something happens to it.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I have the same feeling. Right when I came to.


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[Assistant] Guess I'm headed to the South Pole to get some answers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Looks like someone knew I was coming.


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[Assistant] I need to tap into the fire inside of me. And I got a lot of that.


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[Assistant] I can't afford to meditate in. I'm going to need all my bending.


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[Assistant] Starting to wonder if I should have left those spirit portals open after all.


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[Assistant] What is it about the South Pole that brings all the crazy people out?


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[Assistant] Starting to wonder if I should have left those spirit portals open after all.


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[Assistant] Sorry, but I'm using my Chi right now. Maybe you can just wait here a few thousand years more.


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[Assistant] Your imbalance threatens the world. Now I will set it right.


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[Assistant] It turns out I also have to answer for things I did a hundred lifetimes ago.


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[Assistant] I can't choose. Besides, if you're not number one, what's it matter?


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[Assistant] How many times do I have to tell you? I would never do such a thing to others.


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[Assistant] I said I didn't mean to touch her. It was an accident. She fell and I tried to help.


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[Assistant] I didn't squeeze them. I thought that was your belly.


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[Assistant] She had a lump on her belly before, so I would always, you know, it was funny.


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[Assistant] It's supposed to be a surprise for you. Who knew it would turn out like this?


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[Assistant] I did it because I wanted to surprise you guys. That's why. That's funny. Same.


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[Assistant] I can't believe you're still so mean after all these years, my goodness. I even missed you.


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[Assistant] So will you leave again, or are you staying?


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[Assistant] It's such a waste to be watching to see with you.


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[Assistant] No, not today. By the way, don't tell dad I'm back when you're home. I want it to be a surprise, you know?


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[Assistant] I was planning to come back earlier, but I got held up at work.


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[Assistant] Where's Jen-jen? Shouldn't that girl be home by now?


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[Assistant] Why not? Of course you can trust me with your work. Yes, the contract is signed. Some hotpot? Sure. Wait, it's your turn to treat, right? Sure, I'll see you later.


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[Assistant] So how are you? Did you sleep well last night, son? Yes, I did. Did you stay up late last night? Oh, you bet I did. It was nearly midnight when I settled the dispute.


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[Assistant] It felt just like a deja vu when I walked in. It reminded me when they were kids. Oh my. Whenever they had breakfast every morning, it's a war zone.


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[Assistant] Maybe you should stay a few more days with Li Haiqiao. I haven't cleaned up your room yet.


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[Assistant] M-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m


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[Assistant] Oh, that's great. Now the kids are back. They want to get together, I see. Well, okay. Go on.


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[Assistant] Oh, I can help you with that.


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[Assistant] Oh, you can have it. No, I don't need it. Besides, dad Lee bought it for you. Go.


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[Assistant] Nojumper, coolest podcast in the world, and today I'm here with the man himself, TJX6. How you doing, bro?


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[Assistant] I've been listening to you a lot. I feel like I know a lot about you. I feel like you've taught me a lot over the past couple of weeks. Uh, tell me a little bit about where you're from.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Really? Okay. What were your parents like?


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[Assistant] What is it with your mentality that you've always just figured out a scam or figured out a way to finesse?