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[Assistant] My wife wasn't there. She wasn't there yet. She said that the people that she was with saw that, said they saw Mikey McNuggets. He said, Mikey McNuggets just walked past her like 15 minutes ago.


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[Assistant] Look at you, look all distinguished!


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[Assistant] Ayy, I'd have it on my head too like you if I could grow it.


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[Assistant] Well, I like to tell people that first things first, you win the game that is played, right?


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[Assistant] You don't know, you go in there with a game plan, you think you're gonna be able to take advantage of different things or what have you.


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[Assistant] And then the game starts, it's pouring, you can't touch the, you can't throw the ball, and now you, you just in win mode. Do whatever you can to win the ball, win the game.


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[Assistant] And I had nothing but compliments to give to that offensive line, uh, even with Conklin out.


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[Assistant] Uh, big boy came in and did this thing. The running game. When you run the ball.


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[Assistant] For over 150 yards as a team, when everybody in that stadium know all you can do is run, you doing work.


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[Assistant] And I don't think people really understand that. It was hard for everybody to throw that football. I mean, Deshaun was squeezing onto it too tight. A lot of balls were coming up short because he was scared it was going to slip. Joe Burrow threw a bunch of ducks. So, couldn't do nothing there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it was just an all around, and that's not even talking about that defense. What that defense did to Joe Borough was a work of art. I love, I've been saying this now for about two or three years. Every other team.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For too long, I've watched him sit in one spot and have the offensive line slide to him, chip tight ends, or what have you.


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[Assistant] That's taking advantage and using your weapons to win a football game. So when they start doing that, the bingles, oh my god, what are we gonna do? He's not lined up where you said he was gonna be lined up.


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[Assistant] Pretty special to watch. Uh, next game might be different.


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[Assistant] I do, it was excellent because it got to a point where, you know, he swallowed his pride and said,


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[Assistant] I know I got this 230 million dollar quarterback, but I'ma say it like this. This is what we need to do to win this game. And that's what they did. And that's it. That's a coach's job. Right? Do what you can to win the game. They won the game. And in fact, in fact,


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[Assistant] They dominated the line of scrimmage, both offensively and defensively.


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[Assistant] And so when you talk about, we do, we, uh, run the ball, we throw the ball to set up the run. That's not what that looked like yesterday or Sunday.


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[Assistant] Well, here's the deal. If you have any questions, they held their own.


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[Assistant] You know what I mean? I mean, the, uh, the guy who took over Conklin, I forget his name.


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[Assistant] You know they must have liked him and wanted to see something. He played more snaps than anybody in the preseason.


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[Assistant] So, like, yeaah, so, look, they, they found somebody, they found some, some guys that can pick up the slack and, and look, you ain't gonna just get around him. That dude's a moose! He is! Look at him! He's a giant!


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[Assistant] Well, here's the main problem. The main problem is everybody don't have one.


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[Assistant] Right? And you can get away, you can get away with not paying the running back, but you can't get away with having a quality quarterback and not paying.


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[Assistant] So when you start putting that much money, you're an owner and you spending 200 million guaranteed on a quarterback, who you want to see do well. And, and it sucks for this reason, because when you look at and you get to the end of this season, right?


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[Assistant] Even in a Super, you always gonna have that one guy that run for like 120. Right?


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[Assistant] If you're going to throw the ball all the time and you put your offensive line in that situation, case in point, was it Dwyane Jones, right? Yup. Go Bucks. So, so.


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[Assistant] If he backing up and TJ White is trying to go around him all the time. Like, yeah, that ain't fair.


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[Assistant] But put, put that 370 and have him lean on TJ White every now and then. You know what I'm saying?


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[Assistant] Now how weak them legs gon' get? Cause now you done bitch press a house for three or four plays in a row. That's how you get that pass rush.


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[Assistant] That's how you kill that pass rush. And you have one of the best, the Browns have one of the best run blocking teams in the league. If you don't take advantage of that and try to exploit defenses with that, you're doing the injustice to the front, to the line.


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[Assistant] And so that's why I always get so offended and upset.


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[Assistant] So they ran the ball and they dominated running the football. It is something special when you can do something and everybody know you can do it. Topps, we talk about the four minute drill.


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[Assistant] You got 10 men in the box, you got two tight ends, and a wire receiver out there doing nothing. We gonna run it down your throat, come get some.


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[Assistant] And you're gonna have to do that at some crucial times during the year. The weather's gonna be inclement in January, going into February hopefully. Right? You're gonna have moments at the end of games, big time games, where you're gonna have to close the game out, getting a first down, running the football because you don't want to stop the clock. And you got the team to do that.


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[Assistant] So regardless of what everybody thinks, Deshaun Watson gonna get his. Don't worry about Deshaun Watson. He had guys open last week. It was tough. But if you don't run the football and you don't start with that,


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[Assistant] No, not, because, because here, here's what he has that a lot of these quarterbacks come to these situations don't.


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[Assistant] They have a defense that's playing well. Right. You got a run game. That's quarterbacks best friend. And you can, you can work it out.


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[Assistant] He'll get better. I do believe he'll get better. Will he be the Deshaun Watson that we saw in Houston? I don't know. I don't know. But to sit here and say, okay.


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[Assistant] You don't have Deshaun Watson throw for 5,000 yards and run your offense up and down the field. You got him for them 5 or 10 moments. Yup.


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[Assistant] Where you need that dude to put the team on his back and make a play.


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[Assistant] Or, or take, uh, have a drive to win a game. Or get you in field goal range with 30 seconds left.


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[Assistant] And you always go into those games thinking, we got a chance. That's what Deshaun Watson is.


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[Assistant] You know, do you understand, if I lift my hands above my arms, right here, and fall down, that's about two and a half yards. Right, Seth Maffey? Right?


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[Assistant] No. But I think it has to do with... One of the things you always say about Pittsburgh is this. They are tough. Right? They are tough.


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[Assistant] They gonna smash, smash mouth, do all the things that you need to do to win a football game. But what happened to them last Sunday, when the same friend came out there,


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[Assistant] I don't think nobody league was ready for that. Right? They put it on him. So, part of his, his lack of success, that game,


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[Assistant] Wait, you wanna piss a whole bunch of fans off? Beat down two touchdowns and you run the football.


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[Assistant] But, but he struggled last year. He didn't look the same last year either, to Ty's point. Like, I, I felt the same thing. He doesn't look...


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[Assistant] Like he has the same explosiveness. Now we'll say this about running back. Sometimes that happens because there's so much push.


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[Assistant] And we talking about everybody, there's like 15 to 25 teams.


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[Assistant] It's just, and what you have to do is, believe it or not,


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[Assistant] You have to do more of a, make it more of a point to kinda not be one dimensional. You see what I'm saying?


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[Assistant] So you almost have to, you have to keep them on their heels. If they rush the passer and you run underneath them on a trap or something, right? Now they gotta think about some things.


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[Assistant] And then play action hits you, you're like, oh crap.


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[Assistant] Pass the ball on first down, but that's the perfect time to go play action.


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[Assistant] Right? Right now, the way the Browns ran the ball, the way the Browns ran the ball last week, if you start off the game with a play action pass and a bomb,


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[Assistant] You might get half of that defense, cause they gon', they gon' be...


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[Assistant] That's the true art of coaching, right? That you have a guy who's limited to a couple of things and you can run an offense where they're concentrating on so many other things, he can do his thing. Right, exactly. Right? That's coaching.


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[Assistant] And I, and I, and I'm one of those guys, I've been on Kevin Stefanski a lot, but I've also given him a lot of credit, right?


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[Assistant] You know, they talk about last year, and they need to do this and this, and I wish they had ran the ball more. But guess what? Jacobi Percent hit his best season as a pro. Jacobi Percent!


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[Assistant] So I'm not going to totally say he didn't do nothing, but I appreciate the fact.


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[Assistant] That with all the things he said previous to last week that he wanted to do.


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[Assistant] And I acted like a damn fool when he said he was gonna pass to set up the run. Right?


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[Assistant] But, but, but let's be careful when, when you go there because, you know, when you review film, right, you're going to look at film and make sure everybody was where they're supposed to be, right? And you're going to take the, the situations, um, of the game into account and, and


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[Assistant] When you're not able to grip the ball, it's not that you can't throw it, but


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[Assistant] You can't put the spin on it to get it as far as you want all the time when you're trying to throw that, that, you know, he throws that rocket ball.


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[Assistant] So you have to be, you know, you don't want to over critique the situation, right? But there are some things that you can get sharper on you. And so.


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[Assistant] You know, I saw that game and TV didn't do it justice.


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[Assistant] Because I talked to some folks who were at the Browns game and they go, oh my goodness, it is horrible. The weather is terrible.


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[Assistant] Uhm, and you know, you couldn't see it with TV as much as you could. As much as you, they could feel it there.


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[Assistant] So, but I do think that they are gonna go into it thinking, look, I don't care who they line up. That ain't my problem. It's the Pittsburgh Steelers. We need to do what we need to do. And, and, and I think you'll hear when you hear the guys talk about it.


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[Assistant] When you hear the coaches talk about it, they all know it's the Pittsburgh Steelers. You know, and they know that, you know, Tomlin.


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[Assistant] So you need to do what you need to do, you need to get better at the things you, uh,


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[Assistant] You know, kind of struggle with a little bit. You need to be crisper with the routes and the passes and stuff like that, but you can't be overly critical.


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[Assistant] Because the situations of the games dictate sometimes how you play. And, and, and look.


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[Assistant] Alright, so I'm excited for this week and I'm gonna say it like this. If you got on black and yellow, I don't care who it is. They gonna play with some pride.


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[Assistant] You, you go, don't ever go into the game saying, well, this guy's out, this guy's out, this guy. No, no, no, no, no, no. Because guess what?


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[Assistant] So many football players have gotten an opportunity with that guy being out and end up being Pro Bowlers and all the famous. So I'm not going to just sit here and just discredit anybody else that comes in.


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[Assistant] They're playing the ember, they're playing the tradition, they're playing all of that. Absolutely, absolutely. I, like, I don't, and, and the thing is, as long as I was in Cleveland, they were good, right? Sure. And it's good. They've been good ever since. Right, and, and we, we,


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[Assistant] So, so I'm not going, I wouldn't let nobody else do it either. They know what time it is. Miles Garrett has played against Pittsburgh enough times. There's been a lot of guys on that team that played against the Pittsburgh Steelers enough times to know what kind of game it is. On the road.


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[Assistant] Uhm, I said, uh, the Browns win 27-17. Love you brother. We'll see you there.


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[Assistant] Unicorn. He is one of one. He can do things that nobody else can do and that presents a challenge in and of itself.


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[Assistant] But in order for him to do the things that nobody else can do, plus do the things that other people at the position can do,


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[Assistant] You need a certain line in front of him. You need certain playmakers around him. And most importantly, you need a certain staff around him. And this is the key. It's funny because we've been talking about this all week long, and I'm hoping we all get to talk about it. You need a staff. Deshawn...


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[Assistant] I feel like you just don't need as many, as many complimentary pieces to get that magic. So maybe the high, the payoff of Lamar is greater if all these other things come in play. And maybe Deshawn is just a little bit safer.


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[Assistant] Our stay healthy, our stay healthy. Will Todd Monkin indeed be the right fit offensively for him? Dashaun finally shaken off the rust of two years. Is Dashaun settling in into


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[Assistant] Is on the Steelers Texans. I'm not with them because of the way that CBS has set up the season. But we've spent all week talking and we've talked a lot about the Steelers and their coaching staff. And I have so many thoughts on the Steelers offensive coaching staff and it literally just earlier today.


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[Assistant] I made this point that the Steelers are playing the Texans. The Texans have a young quarterback. Who do they get to lead and mold and grow, help grow and develop that young quarterback? Bobby Slowick. Bobby Slowick was on that Mike Shanahan staff back in Washington. The staff that produced Kyle Shanahan, Matt LaFleur,


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[Assistant] Sean McVeigh, Mike McDaniel, Bobby Slowick, we're all on that staff.


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[Assistant] They all learned offense, they learned how to teach offense, they learned how to grow and develop quarterbacks under Mike Shanahan.


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[Assistant] Kyle Shanahan, look at what he's done with Brock Purdy. Mike McDaniel, look at what he's done with Tua Tunga Wailoa. I can keep going, okay? Matt LaFleur, what he's doing right now with Jordan Love. Sean McVeigh took Jared Goff to a Super Bowl and then obviously won one with Matt Stafford. He had more to work with, but still, all of that, okay? Then meanwhile,


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[Assistant] All in college. So Matt Canada, in an eight year span, was in college, had six jobs in those eight years. Five of those six jobs were one year. They were all lateral moves. Offensive coordinator and quarterback.


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[Assistant] That's what he coached in college. Then he sat on his couch for two years. Then Mike Tomlin brought him in. And that's what they're entrusting Kenny Pickett's future to. Is Matt Cannon.


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[Assistant] But you know what Jay, this is a greater statement. We heard Kevin Stefanski say so much this offseason. How happy he was. With his staff.


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[Assistant] On that staff, how important are those people? You know, Kevin Stefanski chooses Alex Van Pelt, who was Aaron Rodgers' quarterback coach forever, a guy that played in the league forever. There's credibility to that. Those are all great staffs, okay? So it's not just about continuity, but it's like,


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[Assistant] In 17 years, he's had exactly one assistant coach go on to be a head coach. The guy he fired, Bruce Harris. He has never.


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[Assistant] Talk about coaching trees, okay? We talk about Andy Reid's coaching tree. We talk about what was Ray Rhodes' staff in Philadelphia all those years ago.


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[Assistant] Had an assistant, a position coach go on to be a coordinator. He has never had a coordinator go on to be a head coach.


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[Assistant] Cam Cameron is someone he had a great relationship with. Cam Cameron was his offensive coordinator. He thought that Joe Flacco was responding better, would respond better to Jim Caldwell, the quarterback's coach. He makes a change in the middle of the season. He fires his friend, Cam Cameron, he elevates Jim Caldwell, the Ravens go on and win a Super Bowl.


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[Assistant] John Harbaugh likes Greg Roman. Greg Roman is a very, very likable person. But that offense hit its ceiling. So John Harbaugh said, okay, as much as I may personally like someone, I need to move on.


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[Assistant] From the Kyle Shanahan, Mike Shanahan, Sean McVeigh, that whole tree, he says, you know what, I've got a quarterback that's not necessarily a system guy, so I need a guy who can run a variety of different things, and that's how he goes and he finds Todd Munkin. Let's bring it to the Browns. Kevin Stefanski, as a play caller, loves to say,


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[Assistant] It's hard right now because we don't know how the Todd Monk and Lamar Jackson thing is going to work out. We clearly are starting to see how the Deshaun Watson, Kevin Stefanski thing is working. You have to give it time. I'm talking about a variety of different things. Can someone interrupt me at this point? I just feel like I went on 1810.


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[Assistant] Very good at not publicly showing emotion, but he feels ex- I feel extremely confident.


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[Assistant] Kevin Stefanski does indeed have a tremendous relationship with his quarterback. And I think the excitement is finally seeing the payoff that they've been working so hard towards. And it's again, it's having patience in each other to some degree. And we've had to have that.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I don't see either. First of all, I think they love their wide receiver room, okay? They love Amari Cooper, they love Elijah Moore, they love the young Cedric Tillman, they love DPJ, they love David Njoku as a pass catcher, they feel, you know,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My feeling on this is that the Browns are extremely happy with their wide receiver room and the fact that they can run the ball well. They like Jerome Ford. They're bullish on Jerome Ford. Jerome Ford is cheap. Jonathan Taylor won't come cheap.


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[Assistant] And I don't think that the Browns believe that Jonathan Taylor changes their offense.


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[Assistant] Agent Kidman, we've got him from here. How long has it been? 37 minutes since the first pulse.


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[Assistant] But we've got word he wants a debriefing as soon as you get back.


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[Assistant] My pleasure guys, uh, it's good to join you. Is he ready? He's not playing. What is he doing? No.


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[Assistant] I'm actually driving too, guys. So it is a little bit of a long trip. For some reason, the flights this year are just, it was a little too much for me to pay to come to Cleveland. So I'll be hopping in a car Saturday and heading over your way. Well, safe travels.


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[Assistant] Yeah, no, there's no question. I mean, I thought they pretty much gave, you know, not, not taking anything from the Colts, but I thought they pretty much gave away that game Sunday. Uh, you know, mistakes on offense.


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[Assistant] Uhm, you know, not, not falling on turnovers, that, you know, uh, not executing a third down. I thought it was kind of a comedy of errors at different points and, uh, that's why they're two and one. But I think we all expected the offense to be a work in progress. This is a totally new system.


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[Assistant] Because A, none of these guys played in the preseason. And B, they've had so many injuries. And, uh, I think they went out in Cincinnati in week two and they played extremely well. And, you know, they were taking some downfield shots and connecting on them. They ran the ball well. Uh, it's one of the better games Jackson has ever played in terms of


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, and if not for, you know, allowing a punt return touchdown, that game could have been pretty lopsided. So I think people expected that to continue. Uh, but no, they took a big step back offensively, uh, against the Colts. There's no doubt about that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Come away and say the Browns are still the Browns, not that the Browns haven't had good defenses in the past or haven't had good, uh, you know, players at certain positions and, uh,


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[Assistant] You know, 24 and 6 for John Harbaugh against the Browns, but a lot of those games have been really close and, uh, uh, rarely have the Browns made it easy even on the best Ravens teams, uh, in, in these matchups. You know, I, I think they understand what a challenge it's gonna be. I mean, A, after losing to the Colts at home,


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[Assistant] I think they know they're gonna have to play a lot better, uh, than they played, uh, certainly last week to win this game Sunday. And, uh, you know, I think especially, uh, when you look at the


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[Assistant] Raven's offense for Brown's defense match, match up, you know, uh, they're going to have to do a lot of things better, uh, to keep themselves in that game, uh, or that could get ugly Sunday if we don't see a better Raven's offensive effort.


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[Assistant] No, no, I mean, I didn't even, you know, I was in the locker room, he was on the podium when he said it, I was in the locker room, but when they sent out the transcripts, I saw it, it didn't even...


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[Assistant] Uh, but these days, especially ahead of a rivalry game, it doesn't take too much to get people excited. And to be honest with you, I don't think Roquan is fazed by it at all. I think he's fine with having it on him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, he talked a good bit before the Bengals game too and, uh, he was kind of the first one on the sideline at the end of the game waving the Bengals goodbye on their home field.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's talking about, you know, you know, the, the victory after the game, and he's talking about how, you know, not everybody likes the Bengals too much. So he's not afraid to have it on him, but generally, I agree with you, I think the context of that quote is more talking about a mentality, not talking about particularly embarrassing the, the Browns.


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[Assistant] With some potential, I think they have a lot of young players on the defense that we've seen some in flashes.


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[Assistant] Uhm, and by the end of the season, these guys could be, you know, big time difference makers. You know, the safety, the first round pick, Kyle Hamilton has been really good early.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, and, you know, I don't expect him to play Sunday. He hasn't practiced since like August 15th. So, uh, the concern was their cornerback group. Well, the cornerback group's been okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, they played reasonably well. They certainly did a number on the Bengals receivers, which was a surprise. Uh, the problem has been the edge and getting pressure on the edge and, you know, up front. They just haven't been able to generate a ton of pass rush without blitzing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that's a concern. I mean, the best Ravens defenses usually have guys on that edge that can get to the quarterback.


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[Assistant] Uh, how do you generate consistent pressure? Uhm, they really haven't been able to do it without blitzing. And if you keep blitzing, you're gonna honestly be vulnerable on the back end.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I-I think the concern, particularly this week with them,


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[Assistant] Is just the bangles obviously with their linebackers, their


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[Assistant] Their defensive backs, uh, you know, they have the speed to take away, you know, they have the speed to really take away the middle of the field and still be able to kind of shut off things on the edges if Lamar wants to run.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, I think first round pick Zay Flowers has been as advertised, uh, for the most part.


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[Assistant] And, and get the ball distribution ratio right and, and make sure they're getting other guys involved and they just haven't found that, uh, correct mix yet. And now they're going to probably go with Cleveland, a couple guys short, you know, uh, Bateman, their former first round pick is dealing with the hamstring. Uh, Beckham, I thought would play Sunday and maybe he still will.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I kind of picked a low scoring, like a 2013, I'm thinking of picking a 2013-2113 type game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, this Brown's defense, they're quick. Uh, you know, blocking Miles Garrett and Zedaria Smith is one thing. The DBs are playing great. I mean, it just looks like a complete defense and the timing for the Ravens going in there when they still really haven't figured things out offensively and they're so banged up at key spots.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't think the timing is very good for them to go out there and beat a good team on the road.


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[Assistant] Looking forward to it, guys. So it was good talking to you. Very good. Thanks, Jeff.


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[Assistant] Could that be a salp or a, or a type of a tunicate? I'm just thinking of the planktonic kind that are sort of lumpy and thick like that.


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[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, we met, do you remember, uh, where we met?


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[Assistant] I loved that movie. I loved that movie. And it was just like, there was so many different genres and elements, even though it was set in a certain time period. It was, and, and your co-star.


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[Assistant] It's, it's the scene that everybody is talking about, the scene on the roof when you take your shirt off, and I speak for everyone when I say Yowza. Everybody.


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[Assistant] Through Instagram. Yeaah. We were both getting posted on WhatsApp at the same time.


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[Assistant] So uhm, she like DM'd me and said,


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[Assistant] You know, we should totally collab. So she came to New York, we did a video, then I came to Miami, did another one.


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[Assistant] And then it just, we just kept going back and back and back. Now we are like.


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[Assistant] Like if I'm going to OnlyFans, I don't wanna see bitches that look like me. I wanna see the complete opposite. I wanna see Spanish, like, big booty, big fake tits.


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[Assistant] Yeah, just dark hair. Like, I wanna see exotic. Like, I don't wanna see, like, too many white bitches, to be honest. Like, I'm not supporting the white bitches that is like, check out my shit. That's racist.


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[Assistant] A lot of times when you see somebody and you're like, wait, is she a porn star? And then you realize, no, she just does like only fantasy stuff.


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[Assistant] So when they broke up, he basically like got back with her just so she wouldn't


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[Assistant] Fuck someone else on her OnlyPans, it has to only be his dick. And then he's like, wait a minute, you should be paying me, cause that's my dick. And she's like, that's not gonna happen.


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[Assistant] You don't want to do a surprise anal. Well I'm not doing a period, like ever. But I'm saying if it happens it's going to be like 10 years together and you know.


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[Assistant] Well no, girl, I've read someone, not read, okay, I heard a podcast one time.


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[Assistant] He was interviewing some girl who, for some reason, like, loves to do anal. And she fucking was saying how.


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[Assistant] You want to try it? You want to try it? What is it, like coffee? You like coffee, baby?


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[Assistant] So I lost it and then I was like, fuck. So I said, let me start over. I started over from fucking zero, six months ago.


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[Assistant] So I did that, I wrote a whole email like, I promise from now on I'm gonna make clean content, I'm not gonna curse. As soon as I got my page back,


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[Assistant] Back to work, I started doing even crazier videos because I'm not about to fucking change my shit for you guys, like fuck you.


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[Assistant] Uh, in captions, in memes, in the videos, you can't even say it, like I have to bleep shit out.


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[Assistant] But, so they said, why don't you just stop cursing? I can't not curse. Everything, you need cursing sometimes.


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[Assistant] That's like me saying, instead of saying bitch, uh, girl.


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[Assistant] That would be like, bro, if I was like a normal person and you sent me a dick pic, I'd be like, something's wrong, like.


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[Assistant] I feel like you, I shouldn't be seeing your dick unless I ask you for it. And if you send it to me, it's like, like.


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[Assistant] In New York, actually a lot of people do coke only because let's say you go out to the clubs and you get super fucking drunk.


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[Assistant] I like grimey shit too though, like, like, my type is very like specific.


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[Assistant] Nooooo. What? I consider that totally optional.


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[Assistant] I'm gonna go right after. Cause I haven't smoked in two fucking days.


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[Assistant] Okay, so I can't, no, but I came on like the latest flight and I went straight to sleep.


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[Assistant] Nah, cause when I smoke, I like, I don't wanna talk, I don't wanna, I literally just wanna like, uh huh.


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[Assistant] The good thing about weed though is like, no matter how mad I am, the second I smoke, I don't give a fuck about nothing.


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[Assistant] I don't know why you would even do a drug that you know is gonna, like you, the rule is you shouldn't do drugs that are gonna make you want to suck dick.


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[Assistant] Like no one's ever sucked dick, well, it depends. I'm saying like, like heroin's something like you want it bad enough, you'll suck a dick for it. No one's gonna suck dick for fucking weed.


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[Assistant] And I get all fat, I'm gonna definitely do it 100%.


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[Assistant] No, but remember I told you I never wanted to have kids?


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[Assistant] I feel like if I was in love I'd- like my mom says maybe you just haven't been in love just because when you love someone you want to have a kid with them.


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[Assistant] The second you get pregnant, you lose all your followers. I've unfollowed bitches before just because they got pregnant. Oh, you got married? Fuck you. Like you're pregnant? Yes.


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[Assistant] Maybe I'll follow you again if you, if you snap back and you look good and you're doing other things besides posting your baby every fucking day. Like, I don't think you should be posting your kid on the same page or posting your tits on.


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[Assistant] Really? Yeah, if you're gonna post your kids ha- Bro, with all the fucking weirdos out there, why would you wanna post your kids?


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[Assistant] I told you about all my relationships. You're like, yeaah, I think you should be single for a while. Cause I told you I was in a relationship for 10 years.


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[Assistant] So I'm like, so I was like, you know what? I'll, I'll take your advice.


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[Assistant] So I was like, and I'm like, let me just try to be single and I'm single. I'm just working, living life. I'm fucking happy.


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[Assistant] And as soon as you're fucking happy, that's when somebody comes along and wants to like...


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[Assistant] Just let me do what I do, you do what you do. I would never like, let's say my man also does something similar. Not comedy, but anything else.


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[Assistant] I would never tell you, you're not allowed to do this, you're not allowed to be around bitches, like do what you do, just, you know, there's limits, like, just have a little bit of respect.


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[Assistant] In general, like I'll trust, but that's because like I don't get intimidated by other women.


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[Assistant] Oh, you're one of the bitches, ba ba ba. That's gonna make him want to cheat more, because bro, if I'm getting accused of shit, why not just do it?


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[Assistant] Yeah, because that's the most money. I wouldn't even think to do that.


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[Assistant] And he's so hood, I could just imagine him in a meeting, like, okay, I got this idea. We're gonna make diapers.


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[Assistant] You really never know with me. Like every week shit, something comes up.


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[Assistant] Well, okay, so, I'd rather just not have a kid than have a- I wanna have a kid with someone I really do love. I want the kid to be made out of love. I never wanna be the bitch that's like, fuck it, like, anybody, just mer-


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[Assistant] What is that? Listen, a lot of girls, it's, it's not my, I'm not saying, no, like, it's just, I'm just not attracted to white guys and I never have, like, since I was younger and the neighborhood I grew up in is all like, it's Russian, Spanish, black, like, it's everyone.


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[Assistant] Or you're looked down upon. But my parents are the only ones that raised me to where my dad said, be with whoever you want to be with as long as he loves you like...


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[Assistant] Okay, so this season is like, this fat white old lady went to Jamaica?


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[Assistant] And she's like bringing him here. And they're like, she's madly in love with him.


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[Assistant] And that's basically like what it is, like it's just they go to other countries and then the guys like trick them into being like, I love you and bring me to America.


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[Assistant] I don't, like, when it comes to relationships, I don't need you to support me. But be able to support yourself at least.


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[Assistant] You know? Like, if I'm getting married, we're signing a prenup.


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[Assistant] Every 10 years, you don't think your life just drastically changes. Like 10 years from now, you don't think you're gonna be like, like,


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[Assistant] Yeah, but you just get better and better and by the time you realize your purpose, you're already 80.


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[Assistant] They tell you whatever the fuck you wanna hear, even if it's bullshit. You're not gonna fuck somebody if they tell you the truth, like, hey uhm, you know.


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[Assistant] I just could never date a pussy. Like my man has to be the man that like, like will beat the shit out of someone if he has to.


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[Assistant] Listen, keep it up till I give you pussy and then become, you know, then be who you really are and then it's like, aw fuck, I guess I'm single again.


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[Assistant] I started arguing with someone, like always, cause he was Albanian, he loved to fucking argue with people. And, uh, got knocked the fuck out.


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[Assistant] That's one thing I hate, like, I'm not, if I find, like, I'm not, no.


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[Assistant] No, if you got shit to lose, you'd think twice. When I was younger, I didn't have a lot to lose, so I didn't even think before I act, and now I actually have to really think about it. Like, is it really worth it?


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[Assistant] But if I'm out and people recognize me and somebody wants to fight me and someone else is recording it, somebody screams world star.


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[Assistant] Even when people aren't fighting yet, you know, when they do the whole like talking thing, like, oh, hold me back. I'll purposely scream, well, sorry, just to add people on.


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[Assistant] That's true. Because I've had somebody try to fight me before thinking, because I was like, ugh, I'm blonde, and I beat the shit out of them. They wasn't expecting that.


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[Assistant] I kind of like that. Nah, we were doing a skit yesterday. I don't think I see myself doing that. I'm good. Yesterday this girl, we were doing a skit and she punched me in the pussy.


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[Assistant] Well, it's true, like, I don't wanna see, like, a bitch like me doing stand-up. I wanna see, it's, you gotta be a little weird looking.


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[Assistant] Every bitch that's a comedian is- they all have feminist-


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[Assistant] Followers, I don't have, my following is like 90% men. Maybe 95, like, so all my shit is about degrading women.


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[Assistant] No, not the ones that are out the closet, the ones that are in the closet I'm talking about.


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[Assistant] But if a girl sucks pussy, like she's not a lesbian.


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[Assistant] You know how guys think like, oh is my dick small? No, you're just with the wrong bitch. Find a girl with a smaller pussy. Like stop dating these bitches with fucking like, hallways. Yeah.


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[Assistant] I, like when I'm drunk, maybe I'll like kiss my friends.


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[Assistant] Like, mwah, peck, like nine with tongue and nothing. But, like, I cannot get turned on from women.


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[Assistant] And females too, like, okay, so I'm very specific, like I- If the-


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[Assistant] Okay, so if the pussy's too stretched out, I can't watch this. If her fucking boobs are saggy, I can't watch. If your nipples are weird or too big, I can't, like, I'm- Okay. I'm very specific, like, I need two bad bitches.


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[Assistant] So my man, like, can't be afraid of me. You have to like, dominate me. In private.


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[Assistant] Nah, I mean I've smacked my ex while we were having sex, but that's more because I was mad at him.


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[Assistant] No, he, like, I think that, cause I kept going, I kept moaning that he really thought I was into it. I knew exactly what the fuck I was doing, I was just really mad at him, so I just smacked the shit out of him.


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[Assistant] I'm pretending. Well, as we're doing it, I'm like, you know what would be really funny right now? But if he did it back to me, oh nah.


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[Assistant] So in a relationship, it has to be one person's like the crazy one, another one's the one that calms them down.


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[Assistant] Where I guess, like, I should be going for someone that's calm to calm me down, but I'd be bored.


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[Assistant] But I tell you from day one, like, I thought like, I'm not that girl that like, I'm really really nice and then once we're together, all the sudden I become who I really am. You're gonna know who I am way before anything.


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[Assistant] Your response is as predictable as it is banal. Goodbye.


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[Assistant] Now you feel like you've got someone by your side to share the journey with you.


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[Assistant] First off, thank you guys so much for the lovely, miraculous week. I had so much fun. It's kind of sad that it's over, because it was really fun getting to just focus on like one show. Uh, it kind of helped the creative process in my brain, especially for editing and stuff.


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[Assistant] I was able to kind of just have fun and just make jokes and not have to worry about like other shows or-


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[Assistant] Keeping track of other things, you know, so it was actually really really fun, but I am actually very excited to kind of


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[Assistant] Go back to just kind of slowing it down again, kind of just enjoying our time watching Miraculous. So, very excited to watch. Today we're going to be watching season 2 episode 7, Repost, which


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is a fencing term, which we know Adrian fences. So I'm guessing this one's gonna be about Adrian of sorts? I don't know what he's going to be doing. Maybe he'll go to a fencing tournament and Marinette Creepily is coming to watch. I don't know.


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[Assistant] I am very excited to continue watching Miraculous. Hope you guys are as well. Please keep in mind to go support the official release of Miraculous Laterbug either on Disney Plus


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[Assistant] There it is. I was wondering, I was like, you were interested in it? She's not interested in it.


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[Assistant] You know, you could also just say, I'm proud of my son for winning that fight. It seemed really difficult. There's always another choice.


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[Assistant] Okay, maybe let's not kill him.


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[Assistant] Ohhhh, so we can't take the sword.


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[Assistant] Yeah, but we've known each other for like a month, months?


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[Assistant] Interesting. Okay, so we have Kagami, who is a


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[Assistant] Fencing prodigy. The only daughter of the prodigy. So, interesting. I, I like-


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[Assistant] Fight me, I must be on this team. Like, so dramatic. Like, hey girl.


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[Assistant] That's my thought? Or do we just never come back to this and this character is never used again? It seemed like she had a lot of detail on her. Like, especially her hair was very detailed out. So I'd be kinda surprised if we never came back to her.


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[Assistant] Uh, Laila, who is just sly, sleuthy, like, kinda bad news, and then...


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[Assistant] If you wanted to root for someone else. No, Kagami is the girl I literally wanted. Oh my God. I just realized. No, no, no. She's as long as she comes back again. Oh, please let her come back again. Um, I literally was talking about this. I just remember that literally I was just saying that.


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[Assistant] I think Adriene needs more friends and stuff and like branch out more. And I feel like having another, uh, oh my God, oh my God, she's literally so good. Oh my God. I'm just like processing things.


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[Assistant] She has probably had a very sheltered life as well, cause she's like the only daughter of this like prestigious fencing family. So she's probably pretty well off too.


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[Assistant] And so her and Adrian would have so much to bond over. Oh my gosh, they would really understand each other and that like sheltered life child thing. Aww.


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[Assistant] I don't, I don't know if I want them to date, but like, as friends, they'd be really good friends. I feel like that'd be very, very good for Adrian. That'd be really, really good for Adrian.


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[Assistant] I do find it slightly weird that she has, like, the same hair color as Marinette. It's just, like, slightly odd. And her color is red, which is weird because, like, Ladybug's thing is red.


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[Assistant] So, I'm a little nervous there could be an association drawn there that maybe Adrien might think he likes her, but it's because he's projecting Ladybug on her, but like he knows it's not Ladybug. So it is a little weird cause like, you know, they were like at the same place at the same time. So I don't know, that's the one's a little odd.


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[Assistant] But I sincerely hope that they can be friends and that she actually comes back. I'm saying all these things as if like,


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[Assistant] You know, she's some new classmate, but she's not a classmate. She's potential fencing person, but we don't even know if she's actually gonna be the fencing like on the team or if we'll even get to see those interactions again. So I don't know. Now I'm just a little sad.


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[Assistant] I hope she comes back, she seemed really interesting. She also seemed really strong, which was cool.


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[Assistant] I like, I like her confidence. Cause like, when Marinette is Ladybug, I really enjoy her confidence. But I would really like to see more of, uh, Kagami.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She has a lot of potential. I think she'd be really cool. And just like a solid friend. Uhm.


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[Assistant] I don't know terribly a lot about her, but it just seems like her and Adrian kinda are in the same boat. Both have like this.


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[Assistant] Unrealistic pressure to succeed on them from their parents.


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[Assistant] So I would like if they became friends and it was a good, good friendship for them both. Cause I mean,


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[Assistant] Dramaticness of fencing, but it seemed like she's a pretty decent person. Just...


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[Assistant] Gotta kumatize because, you know, there's so much pressure on her. It's not even that she's a sore loser, it's the fact that like,


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[Assistant] And I don't think that's her, like, being unreasonable. That's pressures put on her. So I think she sounds really good.


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[Assistant] As a additional character, they did, like, they hinted at it pretty hard, like, I would like to get to know Marinette. I would like to get to know her. So it seems like she'll be back with that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, I mean, I'm sitting here still waiting for Lyla to come back, so like...


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[Assistant] Good luck, Kagami. I don't know if you're coming back. But overall, I like this episode. Uh, the like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Indirect kisses from Ladybug and Adrian were kinda like crazy. Uh, that was a lot and the constant like blushing of like Adrian and Ladybug was really cute. I will be honest, I don't


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I certainly don't blush the same way that I was doing it, uhm, you guys called it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Meerkat? Meerkat? Meerkat? Meerkat.


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[Assistant] Uhm, Merricat is very fun to watch. I definitely did enjoy Merricat. That and like, Adrian and Marinette is also fun to watch. But yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know. Like I said, every ship is going to be my favorite ship depending on what happened in the episode. But I don't know about... I don't know.


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[Assistant] Because like they're both just kind of blushy blush, but I don't know.


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[Assistant] No one initiates anything then, which is why we get left in this awkward stance. Cause they're both too awkward to do anything.


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[Assistant] So they're just like fumbling messes. So I wish...


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[Assistant] I don't know. I can't say I wish they were different or else we wouldn't have the weird square. But, I don't know.


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[Assistant] Ladybug Adrian shit. Like there's still certainly a lot of good moments and they're all the same people so at the end of the day it doesn't matter. But, I do wish we had, I don't know.


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[Assistant] Maybe, maybe less of them? Cause I'm just, I'm not, I don't know.


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[Assistant] Seeing two fumbling idiots not be able to, like, put two pieces together is a little bit, mwah, to watch. Where, like, everyone else, like, at least someone's there to initiate something and then you get a little bit of giggles. Where, wha- what'd we just have?


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[Assistant] Those two, they're just bleh. They're two wet pieces of like, toast that just aren't falling apart. Sorry for that really gross visual, but meh. So.


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[Assistant] I don't think Marinette meant any harm, and she obviously said it herself, she didn't, but I don't think she meant any harm with like, calling the match incorrectly.


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[Assistant] Like, number one, you can't expect her to understand or know, there's a lot going on to begin with.


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[Assistant] And then for the fact of like, of course she's gonna pick Adrienne cause she wants Adrienne to win.


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[Assistant] And somewhere in her heart, she wants to be on the fencing team, though she's probably not going to be on the fencing team. But she wants to be on the fencing team with Adri yet. So.


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[Assistant] Yeah, no, I can't really be mad at Marinette. I know sometimes I criticize her and like critique her, but like this time, like, nah, I have no gripes against her this time. I think she did. I think she did the best she could. Of course, there's going to be favoritism, but I think she did the best she could. So.


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[Assistant] Overall, I had a fun time watching this episode. I hope you guys did as well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, I'm very excited to continue watching to see where this season's gonna go. I really enjoyed it. I really like the humor so far. I've also really enjoyed kind of the, uhm, different stories and kind of


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, this was a new character today, but even kinda going back to some characters who I thought would get akumatized in season 1 and didn't, like, uh, uh, the-the-the-the Penny.


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[Assistant] Please remember if you like this video to like, share, subscribe, comment down below as well. Let me know what you guys think. Try to keep spoilers to none at all.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, I do have mods that check, but they can only do so much themselves, so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Remember that. So thank you guys so much for watching. I'll see you, uh, later!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I actually know nothing because I was sitting on the Sideman side, the KSI side. These guys were sitting like right next to all of us. So Banks has like a first hand take of kind of really what went down.


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[Assistant] I-I-I disagree, okay. I don't think he's going to be fine, right? I think this is going to be very similar to Deji, right?


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[Assistant] Deji, uh, fought Jake Paul, he lost, and he went from 3 million views every single video to 600k, right? And I think a similar thing's gonna happen to Logan, but what I think Logan's gonna do to counter that is he's gonna try to come out with legitimate music and try to


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you do it as a joke, I'm okay with it. If it's a diss track or it's a comedy driven, yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was literally on Jimmy fucking Kimmel. For that song? For that song. Wow. Yea, it was, it was strange. So what happened is obviously there was like a lot of memes and stuff that like, you know, I originally did a freestyle with, you know, Dollar in the Woods or whatever and people made memes out of it. So then when I went to go make an actual song,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, I kind of referenced a bunch of memes that happened with me, whatever, right? It was a fun song. But what happened is, is Logan Paul in the suicide forest. So a meme came out with,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I actually disagree, okay? I think if anyone is bringing up Suicide Forest, it's fucking Logan Paul. Dude, all his promotion for this fight was, I did this horrible thing, I had a lapse in judgment, and now I'm a better person. I learned from this. Dude, shut up. Nobody's talking about fucking Suicide Forest. You're the only one. He was milking it.


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[Assistant] You know, I feel like, you know, Logan is probably a better traditional boxer, right? But KSI is an ant, like he's, you don't expect to see these haymakers come in like from left and right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, everybody's talked about it. Everybody's talked about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. People were saying Vitaly, like, was-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, it's a different audience over there too. I mean, these are really, really young kids over at TikTok. Like it's, it's, it's shocking. Uh, dude, a buddy of mine makes the worst content ever. I mean, it is just complete garbage. Overt, I love you. Uh, shout out to Overt, but this dude- Oh, he's doing well on TikTok. Oh, he's killing it, but this is his content, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He goes up into like this little kid, I don't know, it must be his friend or cousin or something. This little kid's playing Fortnite and he's like, I'll give you these Yeezys if you get 9 kills in Fortnite, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or Lou or whoever. And then the kid gets nine kills and he gives him the Yeezy. That's the fucking TikTok. And the thing has like 200,000 views. Like, TikTok's weird.


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[Assistant] Isn't it fucking crazy that three years ago everyone's just like fucking YouTube, fuck every other platform. Now with the way YouTube's been fucking up, YouTube's been fucking up so much that everybody is looking to go somewhere else. And like from the outside looking in, people better pay attention to that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] More stuff. Dude, my snap gets way more views than even on D- Well, I don't even know if I'm allowed to say that, but yeah. Wow, that's crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I love history. I absolutely love history. I will fucking hear about the history of anything. It doesn't matter. I just, I get into it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This guy does the history of the fucking internet, and as soon as I seen his content, I fell in love.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just released, uh, my toy, right? And I'm reading through the replies, and fucking one of the replies I swear to God is, I can't wait to put this in a jar. And I fucking, I could feel it in my throat. I blocked that fucker by the way.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They could headline a fight, I think it would be good, and you could have a very, very good undercard underneath that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Watch the tape. Watch the tape. He grabs him, holds him. You can't do that. Does a fucking uppercut on him. Punched him twice as he was going down. You can't do this shit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, he never should have gotten the takedown because he held on to the back of his head where he couldn't back up and did an uppercut. Illegal. He never even should have got the takedown points.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The referee said in this match that there's warnings.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, I don't know. I think Logan is a natural athlete. I think that, you know, his boxing was okay, but just JJ outsmarted him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, absolutely not. No, there is in a sense that I'm telling you right now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The, the fight that will bring in the most viewers and get the most excitement is Jake Paul versus KSI. There is not another fucking human, alright, on this planet that will bring in more views than Jake Paul and this is why. One, Jake Paul still has that kid audience and they will fucking get mom's credit card and buy the fight.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To everyone above the age of 12 wants to see Jake Paul laid out on his fucking back. We want to see it happen, right? So I think that's the biggest fight. There is, there's no other fight that you could put together that would be bigger.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He should never box again. He took out Logan Paul. He defeated Logan Paul. The self-made multi-millionaire. You never box again. You did it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I'm not saying that Jake Paul is even on his level because he's not. Jake Paul has fallen irrelevant, but he's famous and he has.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's true, look at his numbers. I mean, fucking get socialblade out. Even though YouTube fucked that up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's not about money, it's about views. It's about views.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You guys- Well listen, your boy is about to have a fight, right? Well, he just had this fight, right? So you had all this promotion, all this hype, and KSI just crushed him on the numbers over and over again.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, let's talk about Jake, Mike. Do you think that Jake completely fucked himself by saying that boxing is rigged, all the sports are rigged? Like who is gonna put fucking Jake Paul up for a fight after saying that shit?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The biggest fight that can happen next on the internet, right? The absolute biggest fight is JJ and Jake Paul. Do you disagree?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thank you. Thank you, Logan. That was Logan. Thank you. There we go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, and you, I don't think you can, like, he went in there and said, uh, you know, Logan needed to be a killer. I don't think it's that, dude. I think it's a lot of fucking mental, like, I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna do that, you know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, there's no, I mean, this is just bullshit for Mike. Like, what is he saying? What the fuck is he saying? Oh, Logan doesn't have the killer instinct to win a boxing match.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I think, and I really believe that KSI gave way more respect to boxing than Logan Paul ever did. Logan Paul was being a clown out there, and I'm not meaning that in a mean way, I mean, he was being a showboat, right? He was putting on a show. He was...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Fucking, KSI was just focused on fucking being a good boxer, and he deserved it. He deserved it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, here's one thing about UK YouTube, okay?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] UK YouTube, everybody has each other's back. Everybody helps each other grow. I mean, it's a tight-knit group.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Here's one thing, from a drama alert standpoint, I know based on my research, Logan Paul really did fucking slap and knock the fuck out of that kid. Like that big guy. That's 100% real. They tried to spin it like it was fake and he was paid to go down. No, that was real.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Shannon Briggs was the worst thing that ever happened to Logan Paul's team. Alright, he might have helped him with training. I don't know. I'm not behind the scenes. I'm not a boxing expert, right? But like his Shannon Briggs shenanigans throughout this whole thing really made Logan look really bad.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, I respect him as a fighter and, you know, he was a world champion, right? Like, you know, hats off to him, but like, there's a lot of fucking shenanigans going on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Logan's gotta take that break. He's gotta go through that little, like, you can't fucking walk away from something this big that you lost without depression, right? He's gonna, and I'm not even saying like actual depression, but like the sadness or whatever. Being down. You gotta go through that time period of being down and then you gotta build yourself back up like he's done on fucking, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's a vine in fucking YouTube? He's just gonna have to fucking grind. That's all this is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In, in any podcast when someone's sitting there and they have notes and they have topics that they want to go over and stuff like that, it just doesn't fucking, I can't get into it. Other people might be able to, I can't, I like a podcast like this where there's like no script, you know, like, and people are just shooting the shit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Dude, it's not your grandpa's weed, dude. I can't do it either. I get like super fucking paranoid, right? And then I'm good, but I don't wanna go through that paranoid, like, the first thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yo, how funny is it that his story about meeting Drake is so similar to fucking Fousey Tubes?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Fousey, you're probably watching this. Honestly, like, dude, you went crazy or whatever that was, right? But it was the best summer ever and you made the best content on all of fucking YouTube last summer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was out the other day and this fucking kid come up to me goes, I don't know your name, but the Fousey documentary, you're a legend. That's all he knew from me is the Fousey documentary. That's your legacy. I hope so. I hope so. No, but Fousey is obviously embarrassed and da da da. And I just want to say like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hats off to him, he made the greatest content that year. Regardless.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I met Tana for the first time in person last night and you filmed it and can we please play that fucking tape because I didn't notice it at the time but the scream she made twice is the most unbearable sound I've ever heard.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Real quick, for everybody saying call KSI, I just text him, he's like literally on a plane, he hasn't even responded to my text yet, so, I'm not just gonna call him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Her fucking eyebrows do the fucking V from Vendetta.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He like never uploads anymore and he puts out a fucking video, my bro won. Yeah, yeah, can we talk about that because in the face to face Logan said, he goes, look, here's the DM. Your brother Deji gave me a fucking DM me wishing me good luck on the fight. All right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So if Deji's doing that to Logan saying good luck on the fight and then KSI wins and he's like saying out to the public, oh, I knew you were gonna win, I love you, I made you so proud. I mean, is that some fake shit or what? He's playing both sides of the fence, huh? It's just, it's your fucking brother. It's your brother. You don't tell your brother's opponent, good luck on the fight.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just, it's really strange to me that, like, you know, he can't just put out a tweet saying, ah, I'm so proud, good job, JJ, why does it have to be in a monetized form on your fucking YouTube channel?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, you saw your, uh, your ex at the, how'd that go?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause that, that worked with, uh, Adam Salah. Salah! Yep, and Slim.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm pretty sure from a, from, this is how I would do it, right? Vegas is trying to get into esports, you own the biggest esports org in the fucking world, this is just gonna be politics, this is gonna be like, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's gonna be a lot of people watching that have no idea what you're talking about. Let's give a little backstory. So Jarvis is, Jarvis is a, um, a Fortnite YouTuber.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not everyone. If you don't, if you don't know anything about this Jarvis getting banned in Fortnite type of one in the chat.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey, what's up? I'm on no jumper right now, and we were just talking about the thing with, uh, Vitaly.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What up, G? I should have text you first and warned you before I called. I'm sorry.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, we're just like, what happened, right? Cause like, we heard a couple eyewitnesses talk about what happened between you and him and we're just wondering your take, like what went down.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you know what? He, he's fucking broken a lot of barriers on the internet. Let's be real. Like T.I.'s daughter is Hyman.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Here's the thing, uh, a father, like, should not be involved in those conversations or discussions at all. Like, fucking dads should have that conversations with sons. Mothers should have those conversations with daughters. In that scenario, you have to, but I'm saying, like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, it is a weird scenario. Like, I mean, you, you do like basically porn and shit. It doesn't affect you, but some other people, like they do that and then that's, they're kind of cut off from everything else because of that, you know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I believe, I believe everything, not, not everything, but most of what Vitaly said about that situation. Like, Vitaly was like, yea Fousey was fucking hookers too, like what are you, what are you saying? Do you believe that Fousey's addiction?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just, I find it very, very strange when someone is like famous, you know, young, and they're buying prostitutes. Like, that just seems strange.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's, there's some private stuff, but it's private, but like, for the public stuff, everyone already knows everything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Last night, someone came up to me at the VIP party and said, this is bullshit, it's not real, those girls are lying, those girls, you don't have to do whatever, right? Another person came up to me at the VIP party and said, the story is real, they actually were raped, this did happen.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So it's like, who knows? No one was in the fucking room. No one fucking knows. You know, obviously, you know, people are gonna say like, well, why are these random Instagram models on a boat with Austin in the first place? Like, what is the angle here? Right? Right. So.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, if it's easy to jump to the money thing, like, oh, they're making so much money, they have to stay together. We also have to remember there's two kids involved. Maybe it's stay together for the kids. You know what I mean? Like there's a bunch of different angles.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Did KSI miss a fucking golden opportunity last night? He could have fucking called out J, uh, Justin Bieber.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He could've, it would've been the fucking headline around the world. No, but it's a news angle, right? Justin Bieber came out and said that he would fucking fight Tom Cruise, okay? Justin Bieber's been going on Instagram over and over again saying Logan's gonna win, Logan's gonna win. Dude.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] JJ should have pulled that card last night. He should have. He should have challenged Justin Bieber. That would have been good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Will you stream it live? Yeah, actually. If I die early, I want it to be like fucking stream-lived everywhere. I want everybody to bootleg it too. On the record, yeah. If I die early.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yo, can we bring, uh, Nerd City on a little bit to talk about YouTube? Let's get Nerd City on here. Can we talk abou-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, he hates the Mayweathers. Absolutely hates the Mayweathers. There's beef. And that's who trained JJ.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Of course, and 100% Drake, Drake knew about this FouseyTube thing. He had to have, right? And of course he was like, like just.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uhm, yeah, he got some funds to open SourceFed and then so what he did is, uh, he blew up SourceFed and then sold it to Discovery and then when his contract was running up, allegedly, let me say allegedly in case I get one part of the story wrong. It's been a while since I looked at it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And when his contract was upped, right, because he didn't own his own channel, he started this campaign, like he went on H3H3 and he was like, Hey, I just want to make sure, uh, if I'm not on my own channel and I started a new channel, will you guys like go ahead and sub to it, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So he was starting this thing where like his channel was going to die without him there, and then he fucking negotiated to buy his own channel back for Discovery, making a huge fucking profit. So he like tanked it and then bought it when it was- Yeah, he fucked everyone else because we're not- how is it- it's gonna be hard in the future for us to sell channels now, you know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which you can't sell a channel. How you have to do it is this, right? You have to create a business that owns the channel and then you have to sell the business. That's the only legal way to do it. You can't actually sell a channel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is she uploading again or is she still going? No, she came out with a beauty line. I'm coming out with my own beauty line soon. I was gonna ask you about that. Was that a troll or what? Yea, I've been working on it for a while. No, it's dead serious. Yea. Good luck with that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well look, Shane Dawson did Tanacon, right? Huge success, big fan, so I made the FouseyTube documentary. He came out with a beauty line, huge success, and now I'm coming out with my own beauty line. Like, really-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's gonna be amazing what I come out with and I cannot wait for everyone to see it. It's Keem Cosmetics with a K. Everybody wants to talk about FaZe range.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Why can't, why can't kids smoke weed, right? Their brains are not developed. I think it's the same thing with fucking child actors and fucking kids on the internet, like, just like-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel bad for the good guy YouTubers that get nothing but love, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, it's, I, I can't imagine not being a YouTuber. You know what I mean? But, one day...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, okay, he's in this phase house over in England, uh, England, what the fuck am I saying? New York, right? He's the most, no offense to anyone else in there, they're the good entertainers, but he's the only one that doesn't fucking upload and he's the most entertaining, most interesting person.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So what's going on? What's happening with this next, uh, adpocalypse? Well, this is with the kids videos.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, not just child YouTubers that make child kid-friendly content, right? But us normal YouTubers could be fined $42,000 if kids watch our shit. Is that true?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think they both tried to make that move.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How fucking funny was it when him and Deji were going back and forth and he was calling Deji the P word. He's like, you're a P word. He wouldn't say pussy cause he makes kids content. So he kept saying, you're the P word. Like it's just so fucking corny.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The worst thing that Jake Paul ever did in targeting kids is he uploaded a fucking music video around Christmas time and like the lyrics of the song was buy that merch, buy that fucking merch and he was dressed up as Santa and shit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, you're not allowed to do that? No, not in the UK. Not in the EU. Can we play that for a little bit? Like, you need to hear, like, it probably...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, but I just, I want people to fucking look that up and hear it, cause it's like so fucking wrong, like. I mean, it's, it was just.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They went to them wanting their money back because they were promised to get like at least 200,000. I'm just making up that number. I don't know what it was. They were promised a certain amount of followers and Jake didn't even fucking deliver.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, because look, social media is a fucking video game and everyone's trying to get the high score by getting the most subs, the most likes. People are motivated to put content out there to get that positive feedback like back.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You heard the point that he made though, right? The botters, the people that bought their shit, they're gonna be hidden. Like, you're not gonna be able to see the likes and know that they're a fraud.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Every data point, wherever you've ever been, what your daily schedule is, they're gonna take all that information, everything you've ever said on the internet, they're gonna put it in a quantum fucking computer and they're gonna have so much goddamn data that they're gonna, through probability, through math, when a quantum computer, they're gonna be able to predict the fucking future and rule the fucking earth.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Someone is gonna rule this earth with that and they're gonna have everything and we're all gonna be dead.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Can you point star, can you do a point while you're podcasting?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now the point is, actually, drink champs, I like to say we're like firefighters in Miami. When the call comes in, we just ready and we do the podcast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're always ready to do a podcast. It doesn't, we're not, we're not like just generic, ready, a press run, it's just like, oh someone's in town, let's, fuck it, let's just do it. And it becomes organic that way.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is my, my explanation. There is no schedule to drink champs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So we literally randomly record the shows. So people will come, if we record, let's say three days in a row, then


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nah, and I went to Puerto Rico and my dog Echo, shout out to Echo, biggest producer in the reggaeton, took me to a club and he said, this is gonna kill in America. I said,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Come on, bruh. This is, this is Spanish reggae. Adam.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And watch that CeeLo episode, he makes a guest appearance on it and you won't be disappointed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You don't think we forgive with santeria too? I'll put a HRAGATA on you!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When he was doing, remember when he did Charlemagne went to his spot? Oh yea. We had the opportunity, but it was gonna be just you going.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah, they were trying to like, inhale that into the original deal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But the thing is, the name and the podcast didn't happen at the same time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because we didn't know we were going to call it Drink Chance, but I loved that term that we were saying in the studio so much that I held down, I grabbed the URL, which is the website, I grabbed the Twitter, the Instagram, eventually I got my boy Scam who did the Eminem Slim Shady artwork, he did Beats Rhyme and Life for Tribe Called Quest, he from Carol City.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then, fast forward, and then we're going past a lot of shit, when he was finally ready to do a podcast, it was years later, uhm, I was like, yo, let's just call it Drink Champs, and originally he wasn't 100% with it,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is what I love about him. He's an impatient dude when it's a certain time frame. Like you gotta catch him in a certain time frame. He was ready to go. When he was ready to go and do the podcast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And we were, and it was all ready to go, and then our homie had introduced us to people at CBS radio, and we had, and we had to do a, we had to do a pilot episode, they didn't just take us. Right. Like we had to prove it. Proof of concept. But so CBS, did they,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When it went, they didn't, they were surprised and, and, and we talk about this openly.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, drink champs, in terms of me and Norah, we didn't make a dime off of drink champs until six months later. Because the advertising team didn't know how to sell us, cause it- overnight it went so big.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I don't think you're explaining it correctly because we have a TV season that Revolt pays for very specifically, and then we have our regular podcasts and digital releases, which is weekly forever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then, so Revolt is specific with what they would want in the season. Not Puff. Not Puff. Revolt. They just the same, we would just would like, they, we give them first right of refusal. You want, if not, we, we gonna glad


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But that's what the alcohol is there for. The alcohol is there to make our unpreparedness prepared.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Conversations could change a lot of things, man. And look, look what, um, T.I. did. He had Alex Jones on. Right. Totally opposite views. I mean, he got a lot of controversy. Wait, wait, wait, what? T.I. had Alex Jones. Who's Alex Jones? What's his shit? What's his website? War? Infowars. Infowars is huge.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I don't care. I don't care. I just brought weed off Venmo. Using Venmo. I think that's the feds, FYI. That's the feds.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Big, uhm. Shit, I want Joe Rogan to come on DrinkChance. Oh my god. That would be fucking crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Can I, can I, hold on, hold on, let me give a little bit of an analogy here, I think that's kind of correlating what we're talking about. So, go back pre-internet and pre-all this shit we're talking about, an artist to get respected went on mixtapes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Was on mixtapes, was on pirate radio, college radio, then got the commercial radio, and then came out on the streets.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They needed the streets to buzz, and that's what's going on. They're bypassing what traditionally is hip hop.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you know what? Imma tell you why maybe Tyler and some artists might not. Cause they weren't getting love from traditional hip hop outlets because people were looking at them as weirdos when they were dumb as fuck.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, yes. He left it here a few nights ago when we were drinking outworld wine on the dock.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I put it in my water house for safekeeping, but some brigands attacked me and stole the tackle box in which I kept my key. Attacking an unarmed fisherman? What cowards. Indeed! Now I am locked out, and I cannot retrieve the medallion for you. Is there anything I can do to help?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Israel knew about, about the whole plans because, you know, Hamas didn't, uh, hide them. It was on, on public, on their internet sites, on their TV, everywhere. From the operational tactic point of view,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] October the 7th, we, we, Israel IDF didn't, uh, uh, face any, any surprise over there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, according to the reports in the Israeli media, there was a very focused, uh, reports about the whole plan, the whole offensive plan that, uh, promoted. And, uh, actually, uh, the...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Data, the reports itself were unknown even to senior ranks, senior figures in IDF intelligence.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just keep the damn site covered. I don't want that mad woman getting out of there. Understand?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I am Li Mei. My village was the first conquest of the Deadly Alliance. They have enslaved my people. For this, I will kill them in due time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The Deadly Alliance have offered to free my village if I win their combat tournament.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I have accepted their challenge, but I intend to use the tournament as a way to get closer to them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I will concede that I am not ready to confront them yet for I desperately need additional training.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Then you must teach me, Shujinko. Help me to save my people from oppression.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thank you for your training, Master Shujinko. Please accept this token of my appreciation.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you think he can drive out the Deadly Alliance, then by all means, find this Hotaru and tell him of our plight.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's the warm up. You gonna go to the party and be on before everybody.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You feel me? My pops was like in and out. You feel me? Like, he'd come by sometimes, like, I just got vivid memories. He used to come by and just put me up on some, some crazy shit, like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My first time seeing the pistol, he pulled up in the Cadillac, he had like a El Dorado, like, you know what I'm saying? Pulled up, had a shotgun in the middle like a police. I was like, this nigga crazy. Wow. Real shit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like basically, he was what niggas be rapping about. You know what I'm saying? How niggas be saying it was. It's like, he really was the epitome of that for me because at that time it was like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like you said everybody was really low key, it wasn't cool, you feel me? It was just, but that's how he really was. You know what I'm saying? On the beginning, I ain't gonna say his name, but the beginning of his hood name was Killer. Cause he was like, you know what I'm saying?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I say this shit all the time, like, I really didn't have no guidance cause my moms was working two jobs, I was the oldest, you know what I'm saying?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She really wasn't, I ain't gonna, you know what I'm saying? She hated what I said, but she, and my music, but she really wasn't raising me. You feel me? I was really in the streets, really, you know what I'm saying? So it's like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She really couldn't, wouldn't tell me nothing. You know what I'm saying? I really was living with my dad's sister.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So like, my mom was out clubbing, running the streets, making money.