[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you ain't gonna need all that because I know you're gonna love them. So go check out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All the great specials from MyPillow. Go to mypillow.com slash duck and use promo code duck to get up to 66% off and get the MyPillow Giza Sheets for as low as $29.99.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Again, just go to mypillow.com slash duck and use promo code duck or call 800-969-3137 and use promo code duck. Order now because when they're gone, they're gone boys. They're gone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well you know what Phil said about the 50th anniversary? What? He goes, I ain't big on anniversaries except for one. Two thousand twenty two years ago, a man was born and we're telling time by.


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[Assistant] It's just y'all, huh? Did Jace ever do anything else besides work a documentary?


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[Assistant] Alright, and we're back and we got a few emails in. Probably just gonna do one or two because we're running out of time because of how much fun we've had. But as always, for 200 episodes, you guys have emailed in some great stuff. We've talked about a lot of fun stuff. We've talked about a lot of heavy stuff. Uhm, but right now I'm just excited to announce this one. Uhm, Sy? What? Can you look at the TV real quick and look at that dog?


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[Assistant] What about it? You know what that dog's name is? Nope. Can you guess?


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[Assistant] There it is. Grady from Darlington, Wisconsin.


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[Assistant] Anyway, Grady emailed in and just wanted to thank us for all the episodes we've done and that he literally named his dog.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sigh. Sigh. I've literally gone to the door.


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[Assistant] There's a lot of dogs named Willie from about 2014. A lot of Willie dogs. Time's ticking on that.


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[Assistant] She wouldn't have, uh, she wouldn't have gone with that, but hey, appreciate you for emailing in, man. Alright, we got one question today. And we got, this is kind of a family, we got grandparent, we got- This is the brain trust. The brain trust! New grandparents, newer grandparents, and then I'm like a child. Uh, so this is a family question.


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[Assistant] And I will just say make him big bucks. Him and his fiance, uh, can move in with their parents for free. Easy, easy baby.


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[Assistant] And there's a bunch of, hey look, over in that part of Jersey, apparently there's a lot of big deer and uh, turkeys that he wants to shoot. So here's the problem. It all sounds good. Right now where he lives, he's very close with his grandparents.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yep, it's sticky, but I think you'll do the right thing, my man. But yea, I like what Corey said, just keep your grandparents in the loop. They've been there for you for a long time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You like that? I like that. He mentions it a lot of times. Well, in the beginning of John, they're talking about Jesus on his way. We're just about to celebrate the birth of Jesus, but there was a man named John the Baptist and they were all trying to figure him out. Like, what is this guy about? What's he doing?


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[Assistant] And he said, hey, I'm just here doing this. And John 130 is what he said, this is the one I meant, what I said, a man who comes after me has surpassed me because he was here before me.


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[Assistant] After 200 episodes, I know we've had a lot of fun, I know we've talked a lot of goofy stuff, and I enjoy it, I hope you enjoy it as well.


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[Assistant] But I hope what we've done is put a smile on your face and just pointed towards Jesus. Sometimes in heavy ways, sometimes in light ways, but...


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[Assistant] We want everybody listening to know that you can have a real relationship with Jesus Christ. You can live forever. And while you're here on this earth, you can have an abundant life. And we're just trying to be examples.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're all here. Why not? Because we're not all there. Goodstone had five snacks.


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[Assistant] And he had a cool shirt on and I saw him and I said, hey, you can come in.


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[Assistant] We do, we can just go with anything. I did have one specifically. Okay, Kylie emails in or Instagrams in, um, and would love to hear from Si and Stone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Her husband is in the army and what's the best advice they can give? That's a tough one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're a picture taker. I've learned that about you over the years.


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[Assistant] You got one more? One more. Kelly did ask if we can, I feel like this is kind of a shot at all of us. That's fine. Could we get an episode of wives, no boys, I would love to hear them uninterrupted. Talk about the men. No, no.


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[Assistant] She asked, does Si see everything in green with those glasses?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They conduct research, put together the cool poster of whatever state you got. Well, she really wanted Hawaii, but she got Louisiana and so she's all sad.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do you have any, what, so, sigh?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Zach again? We got 17 Instagram ques- like people are asking where, uh, Zach, where did Jack come from? We have tried to figure that out. They come out from behind us.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I'm a hoarder. Uhm, what's one thing from your childhood you wish you would have kept?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I put a, I put some buttermilk in some cornbread I made the other day, but then it cooks it.


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[Assistant] I'm on, I'm going with the goblin plan for a minute to try and get back down.


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[Assistant] Eight little Debbie Christmas ice creams. So good. And then, but she thought I got one.


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[Assistant] And so yesterday I'm like, lunchtime, I am not buying, I gotta go quick, but I'm gonna go.


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[Assistant] To, uh, the smoothie place, and that's it. I'm just gonna drink some fruit.


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[Assistant] Look, but then, last night, the thunders, this crazy weather, they're like, everybody's leaving, get home early, they're canceling stuff, and I, I leave work and I drive past the gym, whole parking lot's full. So I, at least they're sticking to it. They're like, hey, we're going no matter what.


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[Assistant] Okay, so 100% we did not plan this, but our first ad of the day is Athletic Green, Cy. Alright! So, I mean, we're just...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Seventy-five things. Seventy-five high quality vitamins, minerals, whole foods, sourced superfoods, probiotics, and adaptogens to help you start your day right. And it's good. That impresses me! Yeah. Is it because it supports your gut health, your nervous system, your immune system, your energy, recovery, focus, and aging? That's all the things, Cy!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Look, it's a great time to get started. It's the new year. A lot of people are taking healthier steps right now. So look, this is one that we all recommend. We've all taken it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Phil, you and your wife are on it. Me and my wife are on it. And look, whatever diet you've decided to go on, it's January 1st. I know you're on one. This works with it. It does not.


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[Assistant] It's less than a cup of coffee a day and I know you're either drinking an energy drink or a cup of coffee every day or a Coke or something. And this is cheaper than that. And when you do it, you're investing in an all in one nutritional insurance. So right now it's time to reclaim your health and arm your immune system with convenient daily nutrition.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Especially heading into the flu and cold season. It's just one scoop and a cup of water.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Every day, that's it. No need for a million different pills and supplements to look out for your health. Like you were saying, you don't want to go grab a bunch of different things. One scoop, that's it. To make it easy,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're going to make it even easier. How could they do that? Well, athletic greens is going to give you a free one year supply of immune supporting vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit athleticgreens.com slash duck. Again, that's athleticgreens.com slash duck to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's eight now. He was like, I'm making it to midnight. I said, probably not. I'll make a deal with you. New York. Cause he's obsessed with New York City. He thinks it's really cool. Cause he hasn't been there. No thanks New York City.


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[Assistant] He thinks big buildings are cool. So I was like, I'll make a deal with you. 11 o'clock, New York City, the ball drop and you, you can go to bed after that. And he's like, okay. So he's all fired up about this ball drop. Well, 10, 15 boys fading fast. I'm like, he ain't gonna make it. He ain't gonna make it. So I.


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[Assistant] YouTube 2022. Uh huh. Ball drops, I do the happy.


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[Assistant] And he goes, dad, that's a 2022. I said, yeah, buddy, that was last year. Is that good enough?


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[Assistant] And so he made it to 11 o'clock, said happy new year.


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[Assistant] I like it. Thank you. This is directed at the federal agency.


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[Assistant] No, no. I'm just trying to think of the show that we need of Uncle Si's nature documentary. No, no. No, no. Just why it hadn't happened.


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[Assistant] You got the regular Cheez-It bowl. Cheez-It spent so much money, I feel like I gotta give them a shout out. I woke up feeling cheesy. Cheez-It.


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[Assistant] When number one, goes number two, it's never good.


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[Assistant] Hey, we appreciate you. And guess what? I'll be sitting right here on the next episode. See you later, bud. Hey, Sharpie! Sharpie emails. Do you remember Sharpie, Martin? Sharpie. It was a long time ago.


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[Assistant] I'm gonna try and jog your memory. Sharpie emailed in 10 months ago.


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[Assistant] And ask for advice on this girl that him and another dude like.


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[Assistant] And you said, hey, just move on bro. Yeaah.


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[Assistant] No, he's not engaged, but he did, like, you called it. He moved on, he's like, whatever.


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[Assistant] It is great. So I asked everybody to send us some artwork. He asked an AI program to draw Uncle Si riding a giraffe.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that's basically what it would look like, although your nose is sketch city in this drawing.


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[Assistant] I don't know, but we asked people to sit, and I'm hoping one shows up in the mail. Like I wanted like a legit picture.


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[Assistant] Alright, fan from the south, doesn't want their name used, and I can understand why. Uhm, having a rough go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A few months later, grandpa died, had an early baby, 73 days in the NICU. Grandma died last week. Now her daughter has COVID and pneumonia.


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[Assistant] And she said, I feel like I'm at my break, breaking point. How much more of this can I take? I don't have anyone close to lean on. She just feels like it's just her and her husband and just.


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[Assistant] Cried all the tears she could cry in the last year, right? And it's a new year.


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[Assistant] And that's just a, she just went through just a trash year, which is called what it is. Life's tough and went through everything.


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[Assistant] And she just said, I just want help and I need some advice. That's tough. And there's no one here saying that you are not going through hell on this earth this year. That was a tough year.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In this email was, I want to know someone cares. We care. Uhm, and, uh, we haven't all been through all this back to back to back to back to back like you have, but everything you've been through, one of us has been through.


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[Assistant] Uhm, and it's tough by itself, so what you're going through does seem unimaginable, but we want you to know we're praying for you. I'm going to ask some fans to pray for you, and there's a lot of people that are going to be praying for you, and I'm going to end it with John 1633, uhm,


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[Assistant] I beat you too, I think boy. Nice. Cause Sy said the world's against you, but I got good news, uh, for that. Jesus Christ himself said, I've told you these things so that in me, you may have peace. In this world, you will have trouble. That's a guarantee, but take heart. I have overcome the world.


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[Assistant] It's a new year. Your last year stunk. Maybe that probably goes for more than one person out there. Maybe your last year was really good. I'm not a big new year's guy and everything's going to change, but it, it is a good time to market and say, you know what? I'm going to go forward this year. Uh, knowing who has overcome the world, taking it one day at a time, but we love you. We love all our fans.


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[Assistant] A bunt. Just a series. Mhmm. Since Bo's season started. Uh oh. Are they funny ones or are they just sad? Well, they're just sad. Oh, they're just sad boys.


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[Assistant] I'll just say, we still haven't, well, I took Johanna out there, she popped us a little old yearling. Okay.


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[Assistant] And then we cooked up, I cooked up. Okay. I cooked a whole backstrap. How'd you cook it? Where'd you get it?


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[Assistant] And I split it. Okay. And I butterflied it. Okay, you butterflied it. What'd you put on? I took some, uh,


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[Assistant] Both are good. I put all that goodness in there.


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[Assistant] I closed it back up and I took me a pan.


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[Assistant] And I laid me some bacon out, strips, right beside each other, and laid that on top of that bacon, and then I... You wrapped it? Yea, I covered it up. Okay.


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[Assistant] Yeah, Miss Paula took a bite and she said, let's go get in a stand. I said, it's dark. It's dark. I don't care.


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[Assistant] Honestly, honestly tougher. They're done getting slick, boy. If you're hunting it now, you're hunting it, you know, where you can see a long way.


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[Assistant] That's different, but we're in the woods. In the thickets. Yeah. With a bow and arrow. With a bow, with a string and string. Those don't go as far as.


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[Assistant] She's fixing to convert over to the rifle.


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[Assistant] No, don't put them on the front.


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[Assistant] You need one of them, you know what you need? You need one of them little old crawfish, pea rugs, and put them in that. What? And just pull them behind you.


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[Assistant] And a well dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle.


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[Assistant] Bridge. I wanna play one of them.


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[Assistant] I just started following the signs. What else would they do?


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[Assistant] That's like it. Jumper cable walked in a bar.


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[Assistant] Well I can tell you how to stop that. Well he ain't gonna stop that. I don't wanna stop that. Right. Just like the COVID, six feet, stay six feet away.


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[Assistant] They used to just tie it off, and you know. We didn't ever burn them cows, or the horses. What? I still got all the...


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[Assistant] You gotta do it when the signs on their feet, you won't bleed as much.


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[Assistant] I've already had surgery down there. Them horses just run around, they don't.


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[Assistant] Once you cut it and get your finger in there, don't take long at all. Sir, it is definitely us.


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[Assistant] That's quick. You gotta do it quick so they don't kick you.


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[Assistant] I just hate, I hate seeing a dog get it done.


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[Assistant] Be drinking coffee with your panky sticking out.


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[Assistant] Yep. That's what made me try to uh, find out more about him.


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[Assistant] The different call, I figure a man is after all the ducks instead, you know, most people just make mallard call.


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[Assistant] This man making all the sounds, he must be after them pretty hard. Oh no, I remember when he was food.


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[Assistant] Well this one must have been special. Well no, I'm serious, I'm serious. You asked a bunch of questions. How'd you eat it? I sliced it up and made like a sandwich out of it.


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[Assistant] You know what most people don't think about, they're over there, they miss holidays, birthdays, anniversaries.


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[Assistant] You think she's mad all the time. You talk to her on the phone, you leave. She just talks loud.


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[Assistant] Now she's just talking, she's making sure you hear, heard it. Yeah.


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[Assistant] Yeah, and tell her, hang on, let me solve all the problems.


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[Assistant] Above all, love each other deeply because love covers over a multitude of things. Ain't that the truth?


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[Assistant] Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.


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[Assistant] Something made me mad a while ago. Look at that face. Yeaah. You're getting a scowl on your face again, Waylon.


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[Assistant] Now I enjoyed the show between the kids about, you know, all the different faces they was making.


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[Assistant] That brings up some fond memories of when Scott was growing up and all the trouble we had with him and with the neighbors and all this crap.


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[Assistant] So we had to watch him closely, you know, and we had a neighborhood kid with, you know, bullying him.


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[Assistant] You know, and, and, you know, the kid knew I had told Scott he couldn't fight.


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[Assistant] You done squared off of it? Oh, no, no, no. So finally he just kept doing it one day and I come out there and I said, come here, come here, Scott. And the kid was standing there. And I said, no, no, no, don't run off, I want you to hear this.


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[Assistant] Talking to Scott. I said, hey, you've got the green light to just stomp him the next time he does that.


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[Assistant] I said, hey, I said, did you understand just what I gave, just done to my son? I said, I took the handcuffs off. He's free. Whoop your old butt.


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[Assistant] And I said, if he don't, I'm going to give him the whipping of his life. And he knows when I say something that I wasn't, I'm not going to say it twice.


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[Assistant] You know, cause if you just say, you know, cause I heard it too much growing up, I'm gonna tell your dad.


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[Assistant] Well, that doesn't do nothing to me. I'm a stupid teenager.


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[Assistant] Yeaah, right then Terry's brought up and then told me, hey look, you know.


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[Assistant] Cause I, you know, I got my last whooping and I mean it was child abuse at 14.


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[Assistant] Yes, the answer would be yes, I deserved it, but I didn't deserve the abuse.


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[Assistant] But there's a, there's a time. Nowadays you can't discipline your children.


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[Assistant] Now it's the human, it's into the human to push you just as far as you allow someone to push you. They're gonna push you, you know, until you finally just say, you know, that's like the bullies.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You finally got to say, hey, trying to be good, your parents have told you don't fight and all this, and you're trying to do what your parents say. There's just sometimes that you just got to say, no, this is enough and I'll fix it. Hey, we've fixed the square right off right now and finish this.


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[Assistant] If they showed up and played. And in my humble opinion, they didn't show up and played. But here's my prediction.


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[Assistant] Here's my prediction, okay. Kansas City against the Bengals.


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[Assistant] Well, no, no, that's the thing. It depends on if Patrick can actually play. It depends on if they show up Martin. He's told you. No, no, no, no, no. It depends on how bad Patrick has hurt. If he's mobile like he normally is.


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[Assistant] It'll be a good game, but I'm rooting for the Bengals to take it down.


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[Assistant] But I think the Bengals have got, you know, a percentage on their side because Patrick has hurt.


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[Assistant] It's a lot that goes into it because, you know, Kansas City has got a lot of racehorses.


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[Assistant] Well, no, no, no, and that's why I'm saying it, it's going to be a good game. But this isn't a football podcast, I'm just saying.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That'd be big for the state of Ohio. I'm going for Joe Burroughs to take it all the way to the top boys.


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[Assistant] I'll fix that. Hey, you know, they got a good team. I mean, but like you said.


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[Assistant] That's a good point. The four best teams all played for the championship.


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[Assistant] Yeah, Gamber once told me if you can't take a hundred dollar bill and if you smoke.


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[Assistant] Do you technically owe him a steak? No, not technically.


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[Assistant] $200 steak. We'll get to the restaurant. I'll just buy a couple of, uh, tenderloins.


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[Assistant] I was on welfare one time, look, and a lady was telling me, Mr. Robertson, okay, if you, your dream job, what would it be? I said, darling, you don't want to go there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She said, no, no, no, I really want to know. And I said, okay, you asked for this, just remember, you asked for it. I said, I want to find somebody that's got more money than they got since.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, because we had two miracle babies. That's true. Because my wife was told by all the doctors, you know, that she would never have a child of her own.


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[Assistant] And that's why it took me 16 hours to convince her when I actually kidnapped her in a restaurant.


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[Assistant] No he's not. Yes he is. Martin was supposed to be here and he was like, ahhh.


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[Assistant] I'm trying not to be fat, but I am anyway. It's falling apart here. All right, well Mickey says, hope you can get to my question. You were going to last time before Cy punched John David. Mickey. Mickey, I don't have your question anymore. Mickey or Mickey?


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[Assistant] Okay, so now that you have all this new stuff. Yeah.


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[Assistant] This person's name is weird, so I don't know, it's not pronounceable. If you could experience anything in the world, this is a very broad question, any experience in the world, what would it be, Si?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was gonna go with safaris and I feel like a loser.


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[Assistant] In the experience. In the world.


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[Assistant] Look, hey, we all know we talk about being healthy. Look, we're your normal everyday guys in this podcast room. We got me, Godwin, Stone, Martin, Phil, Jordan's with us. And one thing we, you know, we're not great at, but we try and do is live a healthier lifestyle. Phil, you've been taking athletic greens, haven't you?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You got, you're both on it. My wife just started taking it. Look, athletic greens is awesome. You don't have to have all these pills and all these vitamins and all this other stuff and keep up with it. Cause whenever you take one scoop of athletic greens in the morning, you're absorbing 75 high quality vitamins, minerals, whole foods, source superfoods, probiotics and adaptogens.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To help you start your day right, this special blend of ingredients supports your gut health, your nervous system, your immune system, your energy, recovery, focus and aging, all the things. And look, you might be thinking, well, that's probably expensive. It's not. I paid more for the drink that I bought in here today. You're spending money on drinks anyway. Switch over to this. It's going to make you feel better. It's going to make you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Great way to start your day. I've said it 700 times on this podcast. Just trust me on this one. You're going to like the way that you feel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, and if you're on a diet, look, it works with it. Whether you're on Godwin's diet, my diet, which hasn't been that great lately, but hey, I'm struggling, but I'm gonna keep trying. This is a healthy, great way to start your day. So right now it's time to reclaim your health and your immune system with convenient daily nutrition.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She would make him eat it out of a spoon, like for a headache. Look, hey, sore throat? Hey.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kristen was just very curious. Alright, quick one. Uh, from Chloe. Chloe. Chloe asks, why did Duck Dynasty stop?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I didn't know that you were like, hey, let's just keep on rolling. Let's go with it boys. I thought everybody was kind of tired because I mean it was kind of what I thought five years of your life.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It has been a while, but yea, well, here's the deal. If you like Duck Dynasty, we keep, there's Unashamed, there's this podcast, Duck Family Treasure. We're still throwing stuff out there. Duck Commander, Buck Commander, YouTube.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just learned something today though, cause I was like, I thought, you know, it had ran its course with everybody and everybody was tired and thought it was good to go, but Si would keep doing it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hi. You heard it here first, people. Long as they keep.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well I, guess what Jordan? I found this product. We've, they used to be called Truebill. Now they're Rocket Money. It's an app.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Look, in this day and age, you gotta subscribe to everything for seven days for free. Next thing you know, you paid for it for a year. This is gonna keep you from wasting money on apps that you don't even use, that you don't even know that you're paying for. Three, four dollars a month.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's going to add up and on average, I think people save about $600 a year with rocket money.


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[Assistant] I hope that's true or- no! It's not true! $720 per year! That's even better! So you can do that.


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[Assistant] Yeah, so look, this is gonna put it all in one place so you can see what you're spending each month on each of your subscriptions and then you know, look, we're canceling this one, we're canceling this one, it's gonna save you a lot of money, man. That's what I need. Right. Save money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've been guilty many times. Martin makes fun of me all the time. But now that I have rocket money, we're streamlining that process and I got more money to spend on Cy for his birthday coming up in April. So look.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's tough out there. I know I'm not the only one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's guaranteed. You've got a subscription you forgot about that you need somebody to help you out with. So stop throwing your money away. Cancel unwanted subscriptions and manage your expenses the easy way by going to rocketmoney.com slash duck. That's rocketmoney.com slash duck. Rocketmoney.com slash duck.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's right, cause it will getcha. Anyways, uh.


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[Assistant] I'm down to just ice. Anyway, I think I have a perfect question for Jordan Summit.


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[Assistant] Random, it's not a real name on his Instagram account, but he asked, pineapple on pizza.


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[Assistant] But here's another ques- and this one's actually super interesting to me. And I don't know that you've ever talked about- Super interesting. Jake!


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[Assistant] Tyler emails in, I don't know if his name is Jake or Tyler, or if it's too French for you.


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[Assistant] I'm glad you didn't. Alright. Well, before Si has a hard time talking about- But, nah, I'm with scary riding to it. For sure.


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[Assistant] And we thank you for doing that. Oh, absolutely. And we thank all our veterans out there. I think they all know we love them, but can't say it enough. We're going to take a break and we'll be right back.


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[Assistant] Yeah, but now, cause Si had a bunch of pet pigeons. Sorry, we were in a break and we were reading through some of them.


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[Assistant] Oh, we gonna survive boys. Chuck Meyer sent that question in and we hadn't, Todd's told that story on the podcast, but if you're new to the podcast, you hadn't heard it and that is.


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[Assistant] Well, you know, good pigeons are hard to come by.


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[Assistant] Thanks for joining us. I had a lot of fun. Yea, that was good. Uhm, that's hilarious. TV was apparently different back then, is what I learned today. Oh yea. Sigh.


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[Assistant] You are pure gold, my friend. Uh, well, we hope you're having a happy holiday season wherever this finds you. Christmas, New Years, we're around that time. So hopefully you gather with friends and family and just celebrate the fact that Jesus came.


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[Assistant] And we're back. Y'all back? We ready? I guess it's running boys. I'm just here.


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[Assistant] I got a card. This is no ordinary card. Thanksgiving card.


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[Assistant] Well, I don't know. Heart line. Yes, it is. Heart line. Hallmark card. All right. And it's from Lisa Ayersworth. In all the nature ideas, you are the best.


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[Assistant] Triple eagle wrench. Three eagles. Three eagle wrench. The triple eagle. I might want to think about changing it. Okay, and I killed a...


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[Assistant] Deer that just got a big chandelier on his top of his head. Oh yeaah.


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[Assistant] Well, I was in the stand. Hey, look, there was four deer up there, about 130 yards. Okay. Two of them were bucks, one doe and a little yearling. And they said, don't be, be careful. Don't shoot the yearling. I said, well, okay. So I didn't see the antlers.


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[Assistant] How did you not see those? Are you blind? I thought the scope was fogged up because my eye relief wasn't right. So anyway, I'm looking and I said, is the deer I'm supposed to shoot broadside to me? He said, yes, it is. I said, I'm going to shoot him. Bam! And it was just that quick.


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[Assistant] So look, no, I'm shooting a buck. Okay, cause that's the question. Is the deer I'm supposed to shoot? Roger. He said, yes, he is. I said, I'm going to shoot him. Bam.


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[Assistant] So look, we go up there, uh, the boss, Eddie, sends his son, says, y'all go up and find the deer and then I'll drive side right up to it. We'll take pictures.


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[Assistant] So look, we walk up there, they went up there, they walked up there about halfway and turned around and came walking back and I said, boy, it's bad news. I said, they done that so quick, I must have missed it.


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[Assistant] You know, and everybody said, you didn't, I said, I'm telling you, it's bad news. They didn't, they didn't look long enough. It, it, you know, I missed him. So they come back and said, oh, he's laying in the brush there about 10 feet from where he was.


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[Assistant] So I walk up there and Stone said, uh, haven't you seen him? I said, no. I said, it could have been a doe as far as I knew.


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[Assistant] I said, but I was told it was the deer I was supposed to shoot, was broadside. But anyway, I said, wait a minute, is that antlers I'm looking at sticking about four foot off the ground? Yeah. Johnstone said, yeah. He said, you mean you didn't see the antlers? I said, no, I didn't see the antlers.


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[Assistant] I said, but hey, look, we had seen it on kind. It was a big buck access to it. I could see it. Yeah. That was like this. Okay.


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[Assistant] But anyway, I was going to shoot him because I told Justin, I said, Hey, you know, shut that thing for 470 and hand me the gun.


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[Assistant] Well, as soon as I touched it, that big axis steer felt my death race.


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[Assistant] Cause son, he jumped in the brush. What did he feel? He felt my death ray. Okay. Cause I will fix this shoot that big sucker and kill him dead.


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[Assistant] Okay, but he slicked, he filmed my death rays, so I had, the next day I had to turn, I lowered them real low. Death ray. So that, that big buck, he didn't feed him.


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[Assistant] Okay, I mean at the, at the bass, right where it comes out of his head, I put my hand around him, I said, good grief, that's bigger than my teacup I got at the house. I said, you killed a brute girl.


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[Assistant] Well, the airport that we land in is Alice. Yeah. Okay. And then the ranch is about, oh, 45 minute drive away.


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[Assistant] Oh no. I said, I looked at Justin, I said, I was looking at him, you know, and he's over there.


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[Assistant] I believe that he's a good chef. He cooks fine food. Look at them deer. Okay. And then the deer. Oh, look.


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[Assistant] Shots? Yeah. Oh, it's not, it's top, it's top knot.


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[Assistant] You know that it actually, you know, I was kind of mad at myself for actually shooting.


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[Assistant] Yeah, hey, then the little bitty one, the little bitty axis buck comes out and stares broadside in the sunlight. I said, I ought to kill you just for doing it.


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[Assistant] I said, but I'm gonna let you go. I'm gonna let you try to grow up.


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[Assistant] Have sauce will travel. He's talking about like the orange.


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[Assistant] That there's a big ghost there at my stand bigger than anything else he's got on camera.


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[Assistant] Alright, I'm fix to, guess what? What you gonna do? I'm fix to pop the big ghost. Okay.


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[Assistant] Well, that's what a Game Warden, that's what a Game Warden told me when I called him, could I shoot a Black Panther? And he told me no. And I said, wait a minute. You mean I can't shoot it if I see it?


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[Assistant] He said, no, cause there ain't, there ain't no such animal. And I said, well, I'll be shooting my imagination in. I said, I got, I got dudes for you. I fix to shoot my imagination.


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[Assistant] You, you have a particular set of skills. No, I wouldn't, hey, I'm serious. I'm serious. I wouldn't shoot him if I saw him.


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[Assistant] Just to prove the point, okay, just to prove the point, I should just shoot him and say, okay, alright, all you idiots, all you non-believers.


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[Assistant] I killed this thing just so y'all would know it existed.


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[Assistant] I ain't gonna do it. To all the nonbelievers! I ain't gonna do it.


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[Assistant] Oh no, no, no, that ain't even come into play. Not even. Not even come into play, okay. I just ain't gonna kill him because it might be the last one on earth.


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[Assistant] They are to make it a rule that they can use kung fu in soccer. That would be way more interesting if they could do that.


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[Assistant] That would be like playing poker for cash. And then at the end of the game, everybody just gets their money back.


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[Assistant] On 8, 812 and 4 to play with since you killed more than 5.


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[Assistant] Oh, Johnny Wayne said that's the flying ribeye of the sky.


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[Assistant] Yeah. And he's the same man that if you ask him how many you kill, all he ever says is, Hey, we shot four boxes of shells apiece.


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[Assistant] Hey, that was, you brought up a thing that I always wondered about, cause every summer,


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[Assistant] The ponds around the house at Dixie Louisiana would dry up. Then when the rain would come, we'd go out there and catch fish in it.


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[Assistant] How'd that happen? No, how'd that happen?


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[Assistant] Okay, very simple. Cranes stepped into eggs.


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[Assistant] That had been fertilized and it sticks to their feet. They go to the pond after it dried up when it got rain in it and they fall off and they become fish and then hey, next thing you know, you catching fish in a, in a dried up pond.


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[Assistant] Hey God, God has got the plan boys.


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[Assistant] He can make fish appear in ponds that dry up every year. Especially gogola. That's it boys.


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[Assistant] That will be around the 20th of December.


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[Assistant] I know it's snowed in Baltimore because my wife told me 77 inches. What?


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[Assistant] Was she there? Uh, no, but she's tight. She keeps up with it. And she said, you know, that's, that's over six foot. And I said, yeah, darlin' 72 inches is six foot. So 77 is five inches over. Mathic. I know.


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[Assistant] It's funny watching people driving that has never driven in mud. If you've driven in mud, you can drive in snow.


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[Assistant] Cause I know my gun, so I know it ain't no tape, but one shell. So I'm out.


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[Assistant] No, no, no, no, just I got two extra in case. But anyway, I walked down there and a doe jumped up and took off running. I got a doe tag. So I just, boom, she don't fall. Boom, she don't fall. Boom, she don't fall. I said, Keith, I can't believe this. I said something's wrong with my gun or I had the bad chills or something. So look, I go down there to look where she came from. Okay. Cause it's like a, it's like a little hole in the woods.


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[Assistant] Well I walked down there and I stick my head inside this hole looking down through the wood.


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[Assistant] And if I'd have been fast enough, I could have slapped a big beautiful eight point.


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[Assistant] I know it's a thicket. Well he jumped out and gets in the open field I'm in. Look. Hey.


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[Assistant] I just wheeled the shotgun toward him to see what he would do. He just sat there shaking his tail. He knew I was out of bullets.


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[Assistant] So look, he just walked away wagging his tail at me, looking back. You wish you had a bullet, don't you?


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[Assistant] I will never, that's right, I will never run out of bullets again. He said never again. Never again.


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[Assistant] Oh, crop top in the duck blind. I look like one in running backs. It's where the Jersey this, you know.


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[Assistant] Taking the year off. No, I'm serious. Depending on what Stone says when he calls.


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[Assistant] A few colleges said, hey, ain't nothing down there. Alright, I'll see you later.


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[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah. I'm not mad at him anymore. You know, if I don't ever kill another one, I've killed enough in my life.


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[Assistant] That's like one of our first hunts in the ponds over in Texas, which is ridiculous duck hunting.


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[Assistant] Do whatever you can. He's trying to live. I would be real careful. Okay, that would be my advice to you. Be careful in this one. Okay, you know yourself. Okay.


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[Assistant] You know, you know, cause, cause you went wild once, okay, now it's flipped the other way, she's going wild. So, yeaah, I would be extremely careful with this one.


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[Assistant] Hello, and you'll be known by, you know, if you hang out with, you know.


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[Assistant] Someone that's doing bad things, you'll have the same reputation, whether you're involved in the bad things or not.


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[Assistant] They don't have the best ankles like what you're talking about when all the guys that used to run with him when he was a heathen come back and try to get him to go and go ahead and get back into it. And he said, guys, y'all don't realize that man's dead.


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[Assistant] Okay, but the thing I want to point out about that is, okay, you think you might can pull it off, but trust me when I tell you, you can't.


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[Assistant] Okay, cause hey, the temptation is there and you, you don't want to, uh,


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[Assistant] Why, why put yourself in that position is all I'm saying. You'll be better off not to do it. Amen. Okay. Cause I'd say 90% of the time, if you do it, you're going to fail. Cause you're going to go right back where you was trying to get out of. Okay.


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[Assistant] So I have something to talk about.


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[Assistant] Well, so everybody's been sending an email. Darren was the first part. Darren from Saluda, South Carolina, sending an email. So say that 10 times real fast. Darren from Saluda. Okay. Um, he comes from good country, South Cacovac. What?


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[Assistant] Anyway, and then like somebody at church walked up to me last night and was like, have you seen this on Facebook? And people are tagging me in it. So there's a thing on Facebook.


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[Assistant] Because a guy made a TikTok saying his niece called an aquarium a water zoo.


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[Assistant] And it's all the wild things kids say, and you fit in.


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[Assistant] So what would you call a quesadilla if you were a child?


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[Assistant] Well this kid calls it Spanish Grilled Cheese. Spanish Grilled Cheese. It's not.


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[Assistant] This kid called it party muffins. That one's probably my favorite. Party muffins. I like it. That's a good, that kid's sharp.


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[Assistant] Speaking of all the weird things in the world, Waffle House is one of them. That's a weird place. Why does everybody always go to Waffle House? Cause it's great.


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[Assistant] They'd quit. Yeah, they didn't throw them out. Just nobody.


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[Assistant] And they just finally had to lock the doors cause they weren't making no money.


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[Assistant] Bunch of mules, whoa and gee-ho. Domino's is good.


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[Assistant] You get that thin crust pizza or the Brooklyn style pizza from Dom- And I'm a pizza connoisseur, sir. I like Domino's.


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[Assistant] And then here's, was there a pineapple on this?


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[Assistant] I like that thin crust pizza though.


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[Assistant] Uh oh, now we got the meddling in local business affairs. Well I can't eat. Economy, economy boys. Let's just get off the subject.


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[Assistant] Martin, you wanna hear a fun email? What? HIG! My boy HIG! Yeah? South Carolina, you know what he said? Our ads are no lie. He wears Tommy Johns to football practice every day and he definitely recommends it.


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[Assistant] My boy Higgs said I got protection from Tommy and my other friend John.


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[Assistant] They ain't got fans, Sy. Hey, we got fanatics, buddy.


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[Assistant] They're both good, but cornmeal's mighty fine.


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[Assistant] Gotta have Worcestershire. Worcestershire. There you go. Hold on, how do you say Worcestershire? Worcestershire.


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[Assistant] Cause we had a guy that worked here and he said, Oh yeah, I got some more Chester Shire sauce. And I said, say that again. He goes, I said it right. Yeah.


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[Assistant] How do I say it? I think he's that right. Wooster.


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[Assistant] Actually, I think we might be going down a rabbit hole that we went down on like episode three.


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[Assistant] We're not sure which country, but one of them.


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[Assistant] Any more Brain Busters? Mmm, I don't know.


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[Assistant] Scratching his ear. You got one of them fancy trail cameras.


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[Assistant] Having kids make you want to pull your hair out. Oh buddy, man. Remodeling a house make you want to pull your hair out.


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[Assistant] Alright, well, he says some very rude things about the vikings and the saints. Um, so Leo, I thought about not showing this, but I will. Um, this, he, he has this on camera.


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[Assistant] How about, what problem made it? That's pretty, pretty exciting.


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[Assistant] Well, Leo's gonna kill this thing, Martin. No, Leo, let it bump. Leo's on a mission, man. Oh, I won't shoot it.


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[Assistant] Look, you can't win at all, so you might as well shoot a deer. Uh. That's white. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Speaking of albinos, uh, these kids came in the store yesterday and they keep buying goldfish.


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[Assistant] I think I'm a redneck and then every once in a while I meet a few children that tell me no, not even. You're not there.


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[Assistant] And these kids start telling me they trapped a buzzard in a foot trap, which is the most impressive thing I've ever heard of in my life.


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[Assistant] They had a picture of an albino possum that they captured.


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[Assistant] But they, they walked to the store from the river. It was a pretty good haul.


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[Assistant] And they buy goldfish and anything they can find basically to tear something up.


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[Assistant] And now one of them's grounded cause he skipped the movies. His mom told him to just be at. I pulled that trick before. Yeah, he was in the woods. So I hadn't seen him in a few days, but I'll probably see him again today.


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[Assistant] But they out there, and I'm like, I didn't do that as a kid, like...


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[Assistant] They're like, huh, we ain't got a boat. They come back about two hours later, just soaking wet. They don't want swimming, swimming, hooking up that. I'm like, I want to leave work and go hang out with these kids. Oh, no, no, no, no.


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[Assistant] Well look, they're in Tupac Bayou, I think is what they're doing.


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[Assistant] Well, they got them a snagging hook yesterday and they're, they're.


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[Assistant] Martin's literally, we're live looking in on Martin's property. Yeah, you need to get rid of them.


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[Assistant] Trail cams are awesome now. They really are. They really are. But before we go to a break, did you know Mississippi


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] State record was caught yesterday. Where at? Mississippi River. He's from Brookhaven. Christopher caught a 104 pound blue catfish. On a rod and reel? 104? No, not on a rod and reel. Oh, oh, oh. Sightline.


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[Assistant] Have you ever watched River Monsters? I was about to say, we're about to change size life right now.


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[Assistant] I went to the Amazon one time and people were jumping in. Ya boy was not.


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[Assistant] I got a couple heavy ones, a couple light ones. We're gonna start like, hey Godwin, Aaron sent you something. Do you know why in Athens no one wakes up before noon? In Athens? In Athens? Uh huh. I do not. Cause dawn is tough on Greece.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You gotta be geographically sound. And then Dan, whose last name starts with an O and then continues on because he's from Ireland, uh,


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[Assistant] He wants to know who the best dancer out of the duck call room is, and I'm not making this up. He put his money on me.


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[Assistant] You couldn't touch me. I'm just saying. Okay. They're making a movie about Phil's life.


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[Assistant] I'm gonna give it to them. Out of this bunch, okay? I'm not fighting. I only dance at weddings.


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[Assistant] Alright, well I'll do one that I'm not sure if this is serious or not, but Billy from Ohio. Remember when we asked people to send in the longest they've ever slept?


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[Assistant] How long did Sy say you slept? I slept 24 hours. This guy said the longest he ever slept was for 6 months.


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[Assistant] If you're having a wedding, invite me. That's right. It's a good time. Yeah. So, invite Cy. My favorite song is Shout.


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[Assistant] No instructions. I can't do instructions. Alright. He reads instructions anyway. So, we've gotten a lot of emails.


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[Assistant] About baptism lately. Just a bunch of them. Okay. Do it.


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[Assistant] I think we're all behind Martin on this. Martin, don't jump the gun on the answer. Do it. Uhm, and I'm just gonna burn through a couple, well, we ain't got a lot of time, but. Ain't no reason to burn through.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So Kylan emails in about being baptized, but the churchie goes to it and baptizing people for like a few months. So he's like, uh, what do I do?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he was like, Hey, can I come up there? If you find one, I'll do it. I mean, come on. Oh, we'll find somebody to baptize you up here. Yeah. Um, if you want.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Where I wanted to go with that is, and there's a lot of people asking questions, cause I think Phil and Si and Willie, like, we put a heavy emphasis on baptism down here in our circle. And I've noticed a lot of churches don't do that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So what I would say to people wondering like, why do we do that? Um, it's cause that's what they did in the Bible. There was never like a.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey, I believe, okay, well sign up and in six months, invite your family. Well, dude was always like, there's some water.


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[Assistant] Everything I've ever read and that's going to be our verse today. It was, I believe. All right. Here's, here's your first step. Yeah. Go dunk yourself in water and because.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And let me just clarify this. People are gonna look at that like it's weird. If they don't understand...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What you're reading and what you're believing in, they're going to like, why would you have another person dunk you in water to signify something? And that's kind of what it's about. It's saying, here I am. Look at what I'm doing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is me. You switched my verse of the day.


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[Assistant] I had Axe 8 with Ethiopian Unix. Look, so I'm going to do both of them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, whenever Philip preaches the Ethiopian eunuch acts-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 836, he said, well, there's water right there. What prevents me from being baptized? And he commanded the chariots to stop. Both went down to the water and they got baptized. And I'm going to read what Sy's just talked about because...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That kinda gave me chills. I don't know.


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[Assistant] Then Jesus came from Galilee to the Jordan to be baptized by John, but John tried to deter him saying,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] As soon as Jesus was baptized, he went up out of the water. At that moment, heaven was open and saw the spirit of God descending like a dove and a lighting on him and a voice from heaven said, this is my son whom I love with him. I'm well pleased.


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[Assistant] We had a lot of other emails too about ages and all that. I'm just going to say, it's a good, good thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Whatever your thoughts are on it, it's a good thing.


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[Assistant] Ladies and gentlemen. We're back. Welcome back. Justin Mutt. Jay Stone. Uncle Si.


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[Assistant] We should talk about our feelings in, uh, Krasomor.


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[Assistant] This says that is peanut butter, heavy cream and cream cheese. That's pretty much what it tastes like.


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[Assistant] I didn't see my sister when she had twins for like four or five months.


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[Assistant] I will fully admit, a lot of people do right before Thanksgiving, I'm putting the lights up and all that. But then I was on a retreat this weekend, um, with some dudes from church and then I went and ate dinner at my parents' house last night and I walked in and there's Christmas trees and.


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[Assistant] Was that people are either really mad that she would do such a thing or really happy. No in between.


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[Assistant] Really? I said, if she's going to dress up the houses and I, then I'm going to go as Santa Claus. There you go. How do you look at it? So I just threw it on, beard. I was, you put the white beard over it, but you know, you gotta pull it.


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[Assistant] I bought that dog costume a long time ago, it's really paid for itself.


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[Assistant] You go ahead and get that sign laminated by the way. And like, just get a perm. Allison, like every other day to this day for the past eight years is like,


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[Assistant] One of my favorite Halloween memories a couple of years ago, we were trick or treating the neighborhood and we're passing the street, you know, that all the rubber sins live on. And, uh, this kid goes, Hey man.


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[Assistant] Telling to his friends on the bike, we gotta go down this street, go see Duck Dynasty, I bet they give out the big candy. And I was like, that poor kid's about to ring Jace's doorbell and Jace's gonna growl at him.


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[Assistant] I didn't know Halloween was so controversial, by the way.


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[Assistant] If you're gonna be Mario and Luigi and go get candy, do that. But if it, I mean, there is a line somewhere where it's getting weird.


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[Assistant] People always gonna try and take something and turn it for bad.


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[Assistant] I'm supposed to bring you, Alison's cooking you food, if you want to talk about that. Oh, what's she cooking? It's up to you. That's all we can talk about.


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[Assistant] What was your favorite sitcom there, Si? Probably Archie Bunker.


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[Assistant] I think I gave mine to whoever, whichever kid had it, uh, Jennifer. Yeah. When she gives somebody else, they make them mats. I will say the only problem with them is, you know, if the battery goes dead, you are going to poop yourself and have a heart attack in the middle of the night and take off running. And then you go, okay.


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[Assistant] First off, somebody sent a whole bunch of chocolate covered pretzels to me at work the other day and I forgot your name, but I had it and I was gonna thank you today. I'm gonna thank you later because I don't know your name, but thank you either one.


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[Assistant] And then our email... Oh boy. We're not gonna cry. Look at me. We're not crying.


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[Assistant] Uh, got a lot of Nick you emails in just making us for that episode, but we got one, uh, Grayson and Emily just had their baby very recently, uh, real early, nine weeks early.


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[Assistant] Three pounds, one ounce. Um, but it's going good, but like then they, they're in the NICU and then we did that episode. And so it's just this whole thing that I can't read without getting emotional, but.


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[Assistant] Uh, he just asked for prayers and sent a picture of Penny. Penny's the daughter. So I, and every, that one like just came in while I was sitting here and I was reading, I was like,


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[Assistant] And we got a ton of emails, so to everyone that emailed in, I read them. I'm gonna send some of them, or all of them, Martin.


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[Assistant] We appreciate it for sure. Uhm, and then oh, Barney.


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[Assistant] From Winkler, Manitoba, Canada. Manitoba. Beth, is that where you're from? She's not from there. I heard she was from Canada. Did you know Beth's from Canada?


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[Assistant] Burn Dog is from Winkler, Manitoba, Canada. And he had a kind of a, kind of a deep question.


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[Assistant] But at the same time, I don't know that it's deep. Uh, he wants to know, can you forgive someone even if they don't ask you for forgiveness?


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[Assistant] It's gonna hurt, even if they didn't ask for it. It's gonna bug you.


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[Assistant] And, and, hey, uhm, they might not know that they need to ask you.


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[Assistant] They might have no idea what you're thinking of.


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[Assistant] And there's also a little something about, you know, if you got a problem with a brother, go to them. So if you need to forgive someone, they might not ever ask you, so you might need to go to them and say, hey man, I gotta let you know something's been bugging the snot out of me.


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[Assistant] And I forgive you, and you might be surprised to wear that.


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[Assistant] That's what I'm talking about. And we, I might get to preaching here cause I just went on a men's retreat and I'm kind of fired up about Jesus right now boys.


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[Assistant] So Sean from H-Town, Go Astros, is a big fan of the podcast, uhm, he wants us to, he didn't say Go Astros by the way. I did.


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[Assistant] He said we've had a huge impact on his life, which is wild to think about, but he said he struggled with alcohol. This isn't a question, by the way. This is just an awesome story. Uhm, and it's troubled his soul.


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[Assistant] So then he heard an episode where Phil said what is known is manageable and he decided right there to let my family and his employer know what he was dealing with, how he had guilt, shame.


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[Assistant] And he just threw it all out on the table. This is what I'm struggling with. This is my problem. This, here it is. This is me. Love it.


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[Assistant] Since then, I've completely recovered my health and integrity. I am two months sober and my relationship with Christ and life in general has improved tremendously. Whoa, whoa. Please share on your show.


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[Assistant] What being honest with ourselves and others whom love us and a relationship with our savior can do in and around our lives. God bless all of y'all and I hope to meet y'all. Love your brother, Shawn. Shawn gets it.


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[Assistant] And he talked about how he prayed for it to go away and God told him, but he said to me, my grace is sufficient for you for my power is made perfect in weakness.


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[Assistant] Which is real confusing to think about it, but God's power is made perfect in our weaknesses, which is what Sean's doing by telling other people what God did in his life. So therefore I will boast all more gladly about my weaknesses so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why for Christ's sake,


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[Assistant] I delight in weaknesses and insults and hardships and persecutions and difficulties for when I am weak, then I am strong.


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[Assistant] My man Sean, you sent that email in, I got all fired up about this Bible verse and then they got all meshed together today. So I just want you to know, that is what you just lived out. You had a weakness, you told some people about it, you turned to Jesus about it, and now,


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[Assistant] I can almost guarantee you somebody listening right now is going to say, ah crap.


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[Assistant] Nope. It just doesn't know it. No, not that bad of an animal. If a horse knew it, it would dominate us.


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[Assistant] Would you rather walk up and there's a cottonmouth sitting there, or would you rather walk up and there's an alligator sitting there? I would rather have the alligator. You'd re-


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[Assistant] Well, I googled it. There's never been a fight of a hip-up vs. a cottonmouth, but I do have video of an alligator vs. a cottonmouth, and that alligator handily wins it.


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[Assistant] Uh, no, but, uh, but a moccasin can beat a hippo. Uh, yeah. Yeah. Oh man, we're, this is a love triangle. I wasn't ready for it. Here's another.


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[Assistant] What? What is the weakness of Batman? It's that he loves too hard and he cares too much.


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[Assistant] He loves what? I don't know. Batman! Batman's got weakness. Batman's just a rich dude that knows kung fu. That's all Batman is. I like Batman more than Superman.


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[Assistant] Superman throat punch Batman, Batman done.


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[Assistant] So you're saying Ba- alright, who wins Batman or Spider-Man?


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[Assistant] But he got shark repellent, so he might have... Oh, he's got two. All the new gadgets, boys.


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[Assistant] So Batman can beat up Superman, but he can't beat a snake who doesn't have legs.


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[Assistant] Hand me the shark wrap I like. We're not allowed to show that, but it's hilarious. Go look that up. Just, you're going to want to YouTube.


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[Assistant] Oh, what happened? He got the shark repellent and he sprayed it off. Wait, who was that? Who played that Batman?


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[Assistant] Hold on. It starts with an E and ends with an E but only has one letter.


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[Assistant] We could take a break, but your Batman talk, I'm just gonna, will you tell the joke about when Batman skipped church again?


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[Assistant] Oh boy! You know what my favorite time of year is, Si?


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[Assistant] No. 100%. The fall. I love the fall. Why? There's football, there's hunting, there's, you can still go fishing. It's just the best time of year, but the only problem with the fall is, the fall is chaos in your pants.


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[Assistant] When you're overheating one second, you're freezing the next Halloween's freezing one year. You're sweating. You don't know what to do. So you need underwear. Oh, and that can be.


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[Assistant] That's true and in Tommy John underwear you're that much better breathing. You just feel good cause they're so comfortable. You can do everything better when you're wearing Tommy John underwear.


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[Assistant] And like Sy said, with over 17 million pairs sold, people love Tommy John underwear. We get so excited, we yell and scream about it and talk about how they have fanatics. Plus,


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[Assistant] Every pair is backed with Tommy John's best pair you'll ever wear or it's free guaranteed. Si loves them, so will you. I love them. Gawain loves them. Martin's probably wearing them in Wyoming right now. It's the best thing that we've ever found in the underwear region.


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[Assistant] Go to TommyJohn.com slash Duck right now for 20% off your first order. 20% off at TommyJohn.com slash Duck. TommyJohn.com slash Duck. See site for details.


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[Assistant] What superheroes were there when you were a child? Was it- cause there was superman and bad boys?


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[Assistant] So that's what, we uh, well I knew you watched westerns, I just didn't know if there was-


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[Assistant] But superheroes used to be cool and now it's like every weekend there's a new superhero movie and then they lose but it's okay cause there's time travel which is dumb.


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[Assistant] Time travel ruins movies. I said I needed to do that.


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[Assistant] I said it. Martin wouldn't let me talk about it. But now that you've brought it up, I need to get some things off my chest.


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[Assistant] Then Jurassic World was actually kinda good.


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[Assistant] Locust. I came to see T-Rex's and they're like, uh oh, they're just going to eat the plants. And then it was all about how we're going to live in harmony with dinosaurs. And there's a kid in like Washington DC petting this dinosaur with teeth and T-Rex's roaming the earth and.


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[Assistant] Triceratops hanging out with elephants? That's dumb.


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[Assistant] I said, if there is a little alligator in a pond, my children are not allowed to pet it.


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[Assistant] It's a putera dog. Anyway, I've been waiting for months to get that off my chest. That movie's bothering.


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[Assistant] See that's, well, and she got that idea from Jurassic World 3 Dominion and it was, that's a bad call kid. That thing's going to eat you. That's right.


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[Assistant] Thank you. We're in charge, Jurassic World. Dr. Ian Malcolm.


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[Assistant] Martin's in Wyoming still. Wyoming, he's in Wyoming. We're turning out a few episodes before Cy goes to get his lungs, uh.


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[Assistant] I wouldn't even ride a horse, so of course I wouldn't ride a horse.


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[Assistant] There ain't nobody in New York City that's done that. There's a bunch of people there. Yea there is. I'm just saying, there's probably not a million people that have ever rode a bull for eight seconds, right?


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[Assistant] The random for 8 seconds. I'm saying 6 sec-


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[Assistant] Well, I'm not riding any bulls anytime soon. Cause I'm a big baby and I have very low upper body strength. Let's take a break.


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[Assistant] That is a deal you can't afford to pass up. Use promo code duck at MyPillow.com slash duck and you will get that deal. The MyPillow per cow sheets are breathable, have a cool crisp feel and look.


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[Assistant] They got deep pockets so you ain't walking back and forth trying to figure out how to get on the bed. Mike Lindell makes sheets that are comfortable and work for you and it's going to save you time when you're making your bed. They come with a 10 year warranty. That's amazing. And there's a 60 day money back guarantee that you ain't going to need cause you love them so much.


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[Assistant] So you've got to check out the great specials from MyPillow. Go to MyPillow.com slash and use promo code and get up to 66% off and get the MyPillow per cow sheets for as low as $29.98. Again, just go to MyPillow.com slash.


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[Assistant] I'd probably bring like a, I don't know, cause I don't think, I'd be worried. A FRIDGERATOR.


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[Assistant] Wow. That, you would be the king of the block if you had a friend.


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[Assistant] We could go back in time, we're bringing something. That's a pretty hard question.


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[Assistant] Help out the people of the past and also become king.


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[Assistant] So if you bring a disco ball and a flashlight, you also need to bring weaponry.


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[Assistant] No, but that's why I want to go back to the 80s, because there was enough technology for everything to be cool, but not enough for us to all melt in our brains with our cellphones.


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[Assistant] I watched enough old yellows. It was a violent time. You had to have a good dog.


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[Assistant] Otherwise that wolf would have got him in Old Yeller. That's by extent of the westerns I've watched was Old Yeller. But I watched it like a thousand times. So that's gonna count for something.


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[Assistant] Okay, so you want to go westerns, I want to go eighties. Why, why that is we don't know, but let's do, let's just do this. If you could go back, you'd get to time travel and see one, one thing out of the Bible. Just one. You got the art, you got the Red Sea, you got Jesus himself, that strong candidate. What are you doing, Sal? Where are you going?


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[Assistant] One of them screwed it up real bad, and he was with him every day. Think about that.


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[Assistant] That dude was with Jesus every day for about three years.


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[Assistant] I think I, I think I got the ultimate one. Uh oh. I think I got it.


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[Assistant] No, that one was close. Like if you could be there when the stone was rolled away, I think that's the ultimate. But, I think I'd want to be at that fish fry.


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[Assistant] That they had after Jesus came back and they're like, who's that dude? And he's like, Hey, throw your nets on that side. They're like, Oh my goodness. It's Jesus. And then he's like, bring me that fish. We about to cook it. He already had fire on the bank and they had breakfast. They had some fish right there. That had to be like the most ultimate meal. Best tasting.


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[Assistant] I was like, how cool, but you know, what was that conversation like?


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[Assistant] I'm out on plagues, bro. We just went through one. I didn't like it.


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[Assistant] Everywhere. You know where we should have all said that we'd go back to? Where? Probably Jerusalem. You know, somewhere like that.


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[Assistant] Just go look and be like, I don't know if there's Jesus. Hey. And then you be like, you could be the guy. They're like, man, we can't get to him. Like, Hey, go through the roof. Trust me. It's a great idea. And then they put him down on the roof.


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[Assistant] Eyewitness reports. So I actually thought about that the other day cause I was like.


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[Assistant] I was listening to a podcast, they were like, these, Luke went and got eyewitnesses of Jesus and talked to him and wrote all these things down and condensed it. I was like, eyewitness reports are good, Cy. All right, let's take a break and we will be right back with a little bit of that hello at duckcallroom.com inbox.


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[Assistant] And we're back. Hey, email me sometime people. I like reading them. There's some interesting stuff in there. What you got? There's a lot of interesting stuff, but I got a good one. So the email address if those are looking.


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[Assistant] To email and you want, you got a question, you just want to tell us something and you want-


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[Assistant] You want us to talk about something? Ethan from Wisconsin, whose email I'm about to read because it makes me laugh. Uhm, hello at duckcallroom.com. Email that.


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[Assistant] Cause we like our fans and we want to talk to them. And this is the best way we have to talk to them.


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[Assistant] Cause Stone and Martin I think would be too mean. So that's why I'm just glad it's us three today.


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[Assistant] Alright, Ethan says, me and my buddies go duck goose hunting all the time. There's one guy in our group that ruins our whole hunt. We're gonna call him Dale.


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[Assistant] Dale wears blaze orange out duck hunting. He gets bored really fast and wants to leave after 20 minutes.


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[Assistant] Me and all the other guys yell at him for it, but he doesn't listen.


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[Assistant] It's safe to say he ruins our whole hunt every single time, not to mention he also steals our shotgun shells. What do I do?


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[Assistant] Yeah, why is Dale, there's my question. I mean, there's a, I'm not invited all that often to go hunt all day with Phil Robertson, but I also don't want to, cause I'm, I'm a little like, with Dale, I like, hey, if they ain't flying, I'm out, bro. So I don't get why he's showing up, because that's


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[Assistant] I mean, I like hunting, but I do get the person that doesn't want to grind out a whole day in a top line, your boy's out. So why?


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[Assistant] I think you just gotta say, hey, Dale, even though it's not his name, I don't think, maybe it is. Dale, why are you showing up and only wanting to hunt for 20 minutes? That's dumb.


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[Assistant] Yeah, he's a real know how to duck, huh? I know, that's what I'm saying, but that's not, that's like...


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[Assistant] So you're saying it is okay to call someone if they refuse?


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[Assistant] Well, Ethan, he's not calling his buddy out directly, but it sounds like his buddy's name is Dale. Dale, you need to listen to your friends.


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[Assistant] Why do people do that? Like, why can't you just accept the fact that you don't know what you're doing sometimes and you need to listen to other people? Why do you need to? Right. Cause it sounds like that this guy's probably like, nah man, orange when I'm hunting. Bad call, bro. That's not what duck hunters do. That's why I go duck hunting with Martin. Wanna know why? He way better than me. Why not go with him?


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[Assistant] He's gone. He's gone. Alright, one more and then we'll call it a podcast.


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[Assistant] Uhm, Seth emails in. Seth? Oh, Seth. That's a biblical name. That's true.


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[Assistant] That's cool. Uh, his parents both grew up in churches from both until they were adult- from birth, not from both, from birth until they were adults. So, uh,


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[Assistant] Well, I think you skipped a sentence, man. But anyway, as he got older, they started going to church less and less. He needs some advice on how to get excited about the faith.


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[Assistant] No, it's not even about church. He says, how do I get excited about the faith? And I would say...


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[Assistant] This virus I've been really thinking about lately and it kinda blows my mind cause you can't really wrap your head around it cause it literally says you're not gonna be able to wrap your head around it. John!


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[Assistant] 2125, the last verse of the book of John. John's like Jesus' dude, by the way. He's one of the main dudes that's always there with him. He's in the inner circle and he's how he ends it. He said, Jesus,


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[Assistant] Can we do it again one day?


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[Assistant] Oh boy, alright! I'm going with you!


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[Assistant] Oh, you'll make it to 37 or 38 weeks and I'm like...


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[Assistant] I can't take it anymore. How many weeks are you? I'll be 35 weeks, uh, Wednesday.


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[Assistant] Absolutely. I feel myself just coming down.


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[Assistant] If I sit wrong, they, they can't.


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[Assistant] And I don't have control over it. I tried to contain myself.


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[Assistant] Actually, it came with six seats.


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[Assistant] Oh, it's insane. It is. It really is. I look at my belly all the time and I'm like...


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[Assistant] In their defense, I cannot stop eating. It doesn't matter how much room I have.


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[Assistant] I'm forcing food. Well you're feeding three humans. I'm so hungry all the time. What'd you have for breakfast? What'd Martin make you? Oh my gosh, well I had the leftovers for dinner at like ten.


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[Assistant] I guess I'll need to give you some context if I text you though, cause I'm bad about that.


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[Assistant] Are you scared? Well yes he's scared. I...


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[Assistant] But if I sat and thought about it, yeaah, I'm a little scared, dude, just cause.


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[Assistant] I've always wanted two. I didn't think I was gonna have them at the same time. Two for one, Zale.


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[Assistant] I'm just gonna say that compared to pregnancy and childbirth.


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[Assistant] No, and not to mention he has told me countless times.


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[Assistant] Let me know if you need your pillow, cause it's a giant body pillow, like pregnancy pillow. It's kinda heavy.


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[Assistant] He told me thousands of times, stop going to get the pillow, and then the one time I get the courage.


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[Assistant] To tell him, hey will you go get- He smarts off. He smarts off. Trust gone.


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[Assistant] Pregnancy is beautiful, we're very happy about the twins, but the remodel is what made that tricky.


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[Assistant] Yeah, cause with a c-section you don't get the, the opportunity to see your children be born.


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[Assistant] Looking up how a C-section works, and then I was like,


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[Assistant] Same. That's what's driving me crazy. No one will let me do anything. No, no. Won't let me do my own laundry and I'm like, I can't just sit here.


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[Assistant] But I also can't do things because I can't breathe. It's very tricky. Contradiction.


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[Assistant] I hate it when I laugh because I feel like Santa Claus on the ground, a big bull.


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[Assistant] Even though it's weird, it never gets old, like, it's weird every time it happens, but...


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[Assistant] I love feeling that, especially when they like, are moving to each other.


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[Assistant] Are they? Yeah, like people, like out, like people that you don't, of course the people I know. Do people touch your belly?


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[Assistant] Yes, that kinda irritates me.


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[Assistant] I don't mind it when it's friends and family, like, touch my belly all day long, I don't care. But if I don't know you...


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[Assistant] Yeaah. And you don't have to say anything, cause a lot of people will say...


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[Assistant] Probably, and this was like, maybe three or four months ago.


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[Assistant] And I was out walking and a guy, a random guy walking the other direction was like, you could bop any day now.


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[Assistant] And I was like, still got a little ways to go. But thank you.


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[Assistant] But then I'll say, oh well it's twins. Cause I got that comment a lot, not just from that guy. Like it, a lot of people have said that to me repeatedly.


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[Assistant] And it was early on, like I still had three or four months, but then I'm like, oh, it's twins. And then they're like, oh, well you are just carrying those so well.


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[Assistant] I should have, yeaah, missed opportunity. You still got a chance. Yeaah.


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[Assistant] Cuz, nothing made sense. I was like, this is-


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[Assistant] You know when your whole body is off, but I was told also through my whole life that if I


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[Assistant] Did get pregnant, it was gonna be high risk, it was gonna be hard to carry.


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[Assistant] But most likely I wasn't gonna get pregnant. And then...


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[Assistant] By saying that because we've been together for close to 10 years and everybody was about to give up on us.


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[Assistant] But I had not told people that that was gonna be a hard thing for me to do, like get pregnant. So my mom was like,


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[Assistant] Yes. Has to be, cause- Okay. This is the last thing we ever-


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[Assistant] One, just because I've already gotten pregnant with twins, and then my age.


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[Assistant] He is so meanable. It's a beautiful life.


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[Assistant] Oh, I have, the points that I've accrued are stupid.


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[Assistant] I have a daughter in college and I got another one for this again. Yea, why are they going to college? In Abilene. Abilene. I have one there.


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[Assistant] Going to college. Merritt has decided to go to Adelaide. Oh, they're going together? Yea. That's a good sign that you did something right. If two sisters that are real close in age want to be together. Now you gotta go out and let them spread their wings and fly. No, actually we're doing the exact opposite. I got a house there.


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[Assistant] Only urging of my wife. Sounds like there's a little trouble just saying go. She's not a hover mom, she's a smother mom. But we're going there so.


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[Assistant] Jessica's going, and I think your wife is going.


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[Assistant] So like, your wife's going to help fix up our place in Abilene, just get all the stuff ready for the girls. Missy helped Cole, like,


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[Assistant] Crap and stuff. I'm doing a lot of college. Get ready for college. We had a huge argument about this because I'm like, you kick them out of the nest and you don't


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[Assistant] Actually, it's a good place, I think, to possibly treasure hunt. Last time I was there, I looked up, like, what's old in Abilene. Like, 10 miles outside of town is a place called Camp Barkley. It's this old World War II training site just right outside of Abilene.


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[Assistant] So look, I talked to the owners and they said there could be like crates of like M1 Grans, like those old rifles from the 40s just in the ground. Or tanks.


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[Assistant] I like that one though. Who owns the land?


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[Assistant] The Portmans, very nice family. They own the entire training group?


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[Assistant] They have like a thousand acres. And they don't care if we, we hunt. Nah, they're awesome. What do they use the property for now? They do a lot of disaster relief stuff. They have like corporate and church events out there. I got an idea. When Missy tells me that she's going,


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[Assistant] I'll just volunteer to go with her and I'll say, I mean, this is a tough transition for these kids and they need all the help they can get to make that transition smooth. I can't wait to see that facial expression.


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[Assistant] You can stay, but no honeymoon allowed. What are you talking about? I've closed the door. No.


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[Assistant] Don't work like that. Yeah, that's how, that's what married people do. Yep. Not at my house. Yep. We close the doors.


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[Assistant] This turned into a family road trip. The girls are gonna love it.


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[Assistant] That was pretty remarkable. It does put it in perspective, I guess. It does.


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[Assistant] It's going to be wonderful. That's what they're going to be forever. But he's not with us. So they had healthy babies, ones in the NICU, hopefully coming home in the next couple of days. So he's not going to be on the next podcast, but hopefully Martin will be back.


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[Assistant] But all reports are good. And so hopefully we'll hear from Martin in about two episodes is what we're hoping for. We'll see. And then when we're sure.


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[Assistant] So it's kinda like, we could tell you some things. Yeah. But it's their news to tell you. But we're not, we're not going to.


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[Assistant] I've always wondered who listens to music on their TV. Me. And now I know.


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[Assistant] Martin forgot the sauce he was gonna take. He was gonna take that with him. To the, uh.


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[Assistant] Well he probably, uh, who knows what Martin's doing.


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[Assistant] Oh, you can buy it straight online from them themselves. Look, my mom's been ordering it. She's on a computer a lot. She's using a pricing gun a lot. Her hands hurt. She started taking this. She's like, it works. That's right. It is the fountain of youth. Uhm, so look, it's super easy to get.


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[Assistant] Get on OmegaXL.com slash Duck. That's OmegaXL.com slash Duck.


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[Assistant] And you will get not one, but two balls and a


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[Assistant] No charge. No charge. So visit omegaxl.com slash duck. That's omegaxl.com slash duck. Or call 1-800-844-48. 88. That's 1-800-844-48. 88. Get you some Omega XL.


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[Assistant] Look, hey, I went on that vacation camping, uh, in a cabin with the king size bed and I laid in the bed the first time. I was like, oh, this is comfortable.


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[Assistant] I got home four nights later and was like, okay, nope. I thought it was, but it wasn't tailor made for me. And I'm telling you right now.


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[Assistant] See, that's how comfortable they are. Helix is awesome, but you don't have to take my word for it. Look, they've been awarded the number one best overall mattress pick of 2020 by Wired magazines, a couple other magazines. People love this thing and I'm telling you it's cause it's awesome.


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[Assistant] They've been recommended by multiple leading chiropractors and doctors of sleep medicine as a go-to solution for improving sleep.


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[Assistant] So look, trust is on this. You're gonna want it. Just go to helixsleep.com slash duck. Take the two minute sleep quiz and they'll match you to a customized mattress that will give you the best sleep of your life. And they have a 10 year warranty and you get to try it out for a hundred nights, wrist free. You're not going to need it. They'll pick it up for you. If you don't love it, you're going to. Helix even has financing options to make


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[Assistant] And flexible payment plans so a great night's sleep is never far away. And they're offering up to $200 off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners at helixsleep.com slash duck. So head there right now for $200 off that's helixsleep.com slash


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[Assistant] Invite him to come here please. Oh, don't worry.


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[Assistant] According to the map of where pheasants live, Calhoun ain't one of them.


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[Assistant] It said next time Stone is on, I need advice. This is from Nate in Illinois. Hey guys, needing some help here. My wife hates to cook.


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[Assistant] I'd like to be able to help more with suppers, but find it tough to have the time to run my small business and help out consistently in this area.


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[Assistant] Just wondering if Jay could give some advice on how he handles this. Grocery shopping, meal planning, meal prep. All that fun stuff.


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[Assistant] I'd like to know how long they've been married because that's not something that, cause it doesn't say anything about kids.


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[Assistant] So it is a time thing, like, you gotta figure out how to work in America.


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[Assistant] Timing. Everything was coming out at different, I was like, okay, this is, that's gonna be cold, that's gonna be hot.


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[Assistant] So you keep cooking the same meal, it gets better, and then the side, everything.


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[Assistant] Alright, well, before we get out of here, I got a verse. You got something?


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[Assistant] Nope. I got one thing I just want to say, uh, have everybody praying for a guy. We had an employee that worked for us for about eight years, Mr. Ralph Costin, and he passed away.


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[Assistant] It was tough, um, on his family and he, he started getting better and then just one day.


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[Assistant] His heart gave out. So, so we're all kind of bummed about that, but be praying for his family. And just one thing, uh, just in the past week's been weird for me, uh, with that, but I realized I was going to the visitation, right? And I never.


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[Assistant] I was like, I gotta talk to his wife and I didn't know like what I would say and I was like, well I guess I'll just tell her what Ralph meant to me. And then I realized, I never told Ralph what Ralph meant to me.


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[Assistant] 60th birthday party ended up being the day of his funeral. So it was a bummer deal, but we loved Ralph and we know he's up there dipping shiners in heaven for the apostles now, I guess.


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[Assistant] Cause he, he was our aquatics director and he was the man, but let me give you a verse, uh, kind of go along with that. Matthew five for blessed are those who mourn for they will be comforted. We have a hope and we have a comfort and his name is Jesus Christ.


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[Assistant] We have an infestation? Oh yeaah. This week on PBS.


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[Assistant] He's got a little while though before he starts band-aiding up him youngins.