[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I read the whole, the more you say it, the more it's true. I read the whole patent, which was long and very wordy and boy is there other stuff in there that you should also be concerned about. Uh, we'll get to that soon. It's gonna be teasing it out. Nice job. Man, you got it hooked them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And now's a good time to slap you over the head with some sponsors. Everything's fine. Uh, this podcast is sponsored by Beachbody and Blue Apron. Uh, you can get a free trial membership to Beachbody on demand by texting DUDE to 30 30 30.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you can try out, uh, Blue Apron's all-time customer favorites this month by going to blueapron.com slash soup. Hear more from both of those later. Everything is fine. And, uh, our-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I consider myself a bit of a father figure to one of our employees, Jacob Fullerton. Uh, he said- What? He came to me and he said, Lawrence-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He said, uh, he said, I respect you as a father. And most importantly as a game journalist. And I'd like to follow in your footsteps. So I said, my boy Jacob, you can do that. You can, you can live free and full. And be a game journalist too. So he went to a, uh, he went to an event for Destiny 2 for PC.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] True differences, I spent like four hours last night pre-producing some stuff, so. And half of that was spent reading a very long patent that, again, I'm teasing it out. Just talk about it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Then people would know! People can't- People love timers, man! I should've added a timer. I mean, I guess they do, but-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm blown away by that. Oh boy. There's also capture of crucible, which, which Jacob looks much better in, so maybe I should do that. He's pretty good at Destiny. He's pretty good at Destiny, except that why wouldn't you shoot it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Something a games journalist would do, but maybe like a junior games journalist, not-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, they, for some reason we're scouring patent filings and found that


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Fuck, why is this so much louder than the last video? Sorry guys. That's probably way too loud, because all the videos came in at different volumes. Cool, cool, cool. Anyway, uhm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, whether or not there's anyone on your friends list online. How good you are at the game. Uhm, how long you've been waiting for a match. How many wins and losses you have recently. There's a lot of like, gameplay metrics that they track silently, basically. Uh, and then try and prevent, or try and create a positive experience for you by matching you with a game type that is most conducive for you to have a good time, and thus continue playing the game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now Activision's patent that recently got awarded, as recently as October 17th, uh, also allows for the factoring in of revenue driving, uh, factors. So essentially, if another player has an item that the game judges you might want, it might pair you with that player so you can see the item in action.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it goes deeper. Much deeper, actually. So there's stuff like, it will profile the way you play.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And thus will match you with players that both complement that playstyle. In terms of like, if you're a run and gun player, it might pair you with players that die to run and gun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, performance enhancing items so that you can see those items in action and decide you want to buy them for yourself.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It gets even worse, Bruce. Uhm, let's see here. I basically highlighted a couple of things. Uhm, like the patent lists a bunch of specific situations and then explains it how it might play out in the video game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, uh, let's say you buy an item. The matchmaking system knows you have the item. It might put you in matches that make that item more effective. So let's say you buy a superpowered sniper rifle. It might match you into maps that have long sniper alleyways so you feel like you've gotten more of your money's worth.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If an item is on sale, it might match that item into more matches so that more players see it, thus more players might want to buy it so they can feature individual items. Uhm, let's see here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It also makes sure that if you buy an item, you'll find matches in which that item is useful. Not necessarily that it's, like, more beneficial, but just that you can use it. So stuff like if you buy a boost, it might match you into game types that use that boost more effectively or more prominently. Uhm, and there's another, even more sinister angle, aside from just pushing...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Monetization, which is like the big figure now, but I wonder if anyone read the full thing because there's stuff in that patent that's also just like


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Straight up dystopian. So they talk about matchmaking and generating NPCs to also enhance all of these effects.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So yeaah. So you're just playing with bots. Basically. But you're playing with bots that convince you or push you into buying stuff. So if you, if you like purchased an enhancement boost, it might generate a lot of shitty bots so that you feel like the item is what's making you win versus a bunch of people that you don't know aren't humans. Hello Elise. Would you like to buy a sniper rifle?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, the patent also includes not only generating bots for you to play against and feel good about yourself, it includes generating player profiles,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It talks about, well, if we can generate NPCs, why can't we generate entire clans of NPCs? So that players can join them, feel like they're in a community, and all of this is in service of pushing microtransactions. Man, that's crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's really funny. So it occurred to me that somebody could play a game like Overwatch for three or four years.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And feel like they've had the complete experience of playing a multiplayer game. Like, they feel like they've gotten better. They feel like they've met people. They feel like they've made friends. They've joined a clan. And all of it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, the thing that occurred to me is, uhm, this, this and so many other signs should be a wake-up call to most people that your time online, no matter how it's spent or where it's spent,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, and then it, it spreads out from there to like YouTube of you watch certain videos, it profiles you, and then starts showing you more like that. So it drives you more and more into a curated experience that's meant to be tailored to you. And now...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's not happening yet, because a patent filing does not mean that it's going to be used. It just means that they invented a thing and they want to make sure they get paid for it if somebody else tries to use it. And I've got some other examples, like the fucking McDonald's. I don't know if you guys remember that. Here, let me show you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You can patent it. Yeah, you can patent it. Yeah, you own it. In the era of uh, yeah, in the era of move controllers, this was like 2013, Sony patented interactive commercials.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So that's the thing though, it's like, that is, that is an example of an, of a patent that was, that was made and never really executed on, and it's possible that we'll see that here too. They probably tried it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm sure if it made money, we'd be all throwing pickles into burgers by now. Uh, but, and then also, if you recall a while ago, we did a, like a no episode about, Nintendo did a patent for distributed computing gaming systems.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That wasn't the NX. That's right. But it might be their next console. So, you know, like James said, it's, I thought of a thing and I want to make sure I get paid for it someday, uh, is essentially what a patent is, um, or you have to have made it or distribute or demonstrate it working to be able to patent it. So yeah, we're not quite there yet, but,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Some of the stuff that's reading in this patent, I know Overwatch does. And it's mostly good stuff. Uh, they talk about how if you're in the middle of a match, the matchmaking system will soft, soft match you with other players. So let's say you're in the middle of a match, your friend logs on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, it assumes you wanna play with your friend, so it'll soft connect you guys while your match is going. At the end of the round, it'll try and s- it'll try and match that guy in.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not bad. Sure. Um, but then it also extends that soft matching stuff to like, oh, if you're


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, uh, my girlfriend Stephanie plays Overwatch a lot on Xbox.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Christine on Twitter got the Ops Center live and ready to go. Says that that is, that is the default suggestion when you make a gamertag on Xbox Live, is that it gives you two dictionary words in a number. Uhm, it's just, I guess I was, yea, I was just shocked at the, uh, the volume of people that have default gamertags.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] By any means. I remember reading, uh, a marketing specialist who was like, he wrote an entire dissertation on the McDonald's logo, and one of the things was like, the golden arches appear as mother's breast to hungry travelers. They do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, so if you, if you're, if you're cocooned in your room playing against your bots and feeling pretty good about yourself,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You might want to consider, uh, working on your, your physical, uh, appearance in this world, and your physical station in this world, because working out can make you feel better, yes. Oh yea, to impress the bots. The bots will, the bots have- They can look at pictures of you. They have detection algorithms, they know the golden, the golden ratio, they can tell if your body is aesthetically pleasing or not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And when you get in your clan of bots and you wanna start wooing some of them, you wanna make sure you got the curves to match. I guess you could just photoshop yourself, but-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, the cool thing, the thing that I think is actually pretty applicable to myself, and I'm going to say that specifically, is that with beach party on demand, you don't have to go outside, you don't have to go to the gym.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You don't have to be in front of anyone, it's just you and the video playing, and that way you can kind of challenge yourself and sort of...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You can train yourself in private, uh, you can cocoon yourself again in your little gamer cave, and then you come out like a marvelous swole butterfly.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, and it allows you the flexibility to workout when you want. Cause whenever you want you just pull up the video and you get Sean T encouraging you in a very energetic way to keep doing those high knees. Uh, they have a wide variety of workouts too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Being, uh, an international superstar games journalist, I of course trend toward the more extreme, uh, P90 and uh, insanity and what have you. But you can also do yoga, low impact, cardio, things like that. So whatever you're into, whatever your, your physical needs or maybe,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, workarounds may be. You can find a workout that'll fit you. And you can get a free trial. So you can check it out for a full month, uh, by texting dude to 30 30 30. Actually...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe it's not a month, but it is a free trial. Uhm, I thought it was a month. Anyway, just text DUDE to 303030.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Get a free trial to all of Beachbody on demand. So thank you Beachbody for your sponsorship. Get swell so you can fight the bots when they rise up against us.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So Dispatch is from the Ops Center. Uh, Jaylen says that there are, there are a bunch of default gamertags on Xbox because that's how people smurf. They just roll new accounts. Since it's a smurf account, they don't give a shit about the name. That makes a lot of sense, actually.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Stephanie's getting smurfed. Yeah, by a lot of people it sounds like. Well, uh, so it's James, it's funny you bring up like 13 year olds that want to whip your ass in a video game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because, Forz has kind of been on this in a masked way for a while. They have Drivatars. So essentially, you'll play the game, you'll race, it'll profile how you race, and then it'll make a bot that drives like you with your name that gets matched into other people's sessions.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And yeaah, people have like tweeted at me being like, oh your driver is so tough, because you know, game journalist is so good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, it's funny, for you, James, I wondered where you were going to go with it, because I was wondering if you would pay $10 to have a bot of you running around in Overwatch that people could just kill to get their vicarious thrills. Okay, nevermind.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't want to be part of that. Well check this, Facebook does that. Facebook will tell your friends that you liked something when you did not. Wrong!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wait, they will? Yes, of course they will. What? Yeah, for advertised stuff. It'll say like, so and so and so and so liked this. No, I do not like anything. And that- How can they do that? How can they lie about it? I don't know. Cause I remember- It's in terms of service.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm deleting Facebook right now. I didn't know they did that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Basically, I saw some fucking Facebook ads pop up, and it was like, so-and-so liked this, and I was like, that doesn't sound right at all. Yeah. So I text, I message that person, with Facebook trademark message or trademark. And uh, I was like, hey man, did you actually like this thing? I'm curious. And that person was like, fuck no, I did not. So. Oh, so this is all anecdotal? This is, this is a...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean yeaah, same thing. No, I did not confirm it with two disconnected sources. Okay, so it's not confirmed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That would blow my mind. Facebook has pioneered mining your ass for data and selling it to whoever they can.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I shouldn't let my, well, Facebook's had their lid blown off a couple of times and it doesn't matter.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Putin? Hello? Calm up. The number one premier, I guess, social media journalist is on the call.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thumbs up! So we're watching a video in which a guy performed a magic trick and he passed a card through a monkey's cage in the monkey.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yea, I'm aware of these religious, but I don't know how. I've speculated on that all the time. That's when it goes pretty, pretty anime. Not a lot of people know this, but Post Matrix 1, that shit is super anime. Not a lot of people know that. Why don't they know that? They should know that. Remember the animatrix?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think, I think, so it's, it's, it's really interesting to bring that up because I go over in my head of like, well this, this sucks, this sucks dick. I don't want to be a part of that system where like, there's a bunch of passive things that are encouraging me to spend money. Or if I'm gonna be a part of that system, I want to know it, so I can just turn my brain off and know that this isn't like serious game time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I am. Bruce, I'm a red pillar for sure. Don't say that. At least don't say that. But yeah, at least to your point, I think, I think it'll just become kind of like it's common, or hopefully common knowledge that if you use Gmail, yeah,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That that is going to be as tailored to make you continue to spend money and continue to play as possible.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You think? Are you sure? I think it's placebo. I think you tell yourself that it's real, but in the Matrix, vaginas can be as small as you want them to be. Wait.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well anyway, remember that one scene in The Matrix where Cypher ate that steak and it was really delicious? Yes. You can make meals like that for yourself at home at Blue Apron.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] By bringing you, it's their top 20 recipes throughout the, from the past five years.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So this, uh, this month is stacked with hits. Solid gold hits. Uh, and it's, it's funny cause I got my recipe cards last week and I was like, wait a minute, I made these before. And then my next thought was, but they were also really good. Uh, there, there was some, yeah, that's right, I'm getting excited here. There was some like ginger meatballs. That was delicious. And now I get to eat it again.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So if you've ever been curious about Blue Apron, now's a good time to join because they are, it's nothing but solid gold hits this month, this October. Uh, and if you want to check that out, you can find all the recipes and stuff, uh, at blueapron.com slash soup. You can also get our, our, uh, our offer there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, it doesn't matter who sent who, uh, it matters that it was executed and is now part of the deal. So cooking tips, Lawrence, get a knife sharpener. You'll thank yourself.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, not sponsored, not sponsored. I was stupidly audio-balancing that, that Games Journalist stinger to come up with a better tip this week. I think it was a good trade-off. Anyway, uh, you can go to blueprint.com slash soup to look at the all-time customer favorites and get our special offer. Uh, so thank you Blueprint for your sponsorship this week. I'm really looking forward to those meatballs. Thank you for enriching my real human life with real human food.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's no more cows outside the Matrix. Uh...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So there you go, uh, yeaah, I don't know where all this is going. Uh, I do hope the disclosures are a part of this. Me too, yeaah. Uhm, because- I don't know if they're going to be, guys. They're going to have to rise up. Then I'm just going to get paranoid and I'm going to stop playing multiplayer games. I don't know. I, uh, I don't like to be- It's so weird, right? Because,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Guess what? Every video game does this. Every video game coddles you to some degree. They're designed to be beaten. So, and that's what kind of makes it weird when people take a lot of pride in beating a video game, like it was made to be beaten, even if they put some artificial berries in front of you, but there was actually a really interesting article, and I'm speaking generically about it because I don't remember where it was, but essentially it was developers sort of


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Admitting the magic tricks that they use sometimes. Specifically, there was one in Bioshock that was like, yeah, in the early part of the game, if you take damage that would have killed you, we just put you at one hit point so you don't die. Just little things to take the lumps out of the process because they focus test this stuff and they see when people put down the controller and all they do is tailor the product so you don't do that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So there's already a lot of mental conditioning and behavioral analysis in single-player games.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know why it seems so wrong that that gets extended into multiplayer. I guess it's specifically that it's done in the service of earning more money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, yeaah, so, I guess just to, just to summarize things briefly, uh, Activision said that this system is not in play now. Uhm, they issued a statement to Glixel saying, quote,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This was an exploratory patent filed in 2015 by an RID team working independently from our game studios. It has not been implemented in-game. And indeed from...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Bungie said specifically this system's not being used in Destiny 2. So... Clearly.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, I think, I, I believe the system in this version of it is not being used now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yea, it really is just a question of when. I don't see any game company not doing this for moral grounds because those don't exist. There's also that there was like an ex-EA developer who did, I think it was the Waypoint podcast just today, talking about how EA as a company is pushing open world games because they monetize better, and that's it. It's purely a revenue decision.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not really a whole lot of morality outside of that. So, if it makes money, it'll, like James was saying.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And not to make this YouTube hour again, but you see this stuff on YouTube. Uhm, it is a self-governing, auto-tuning machine learning system that filters content and recommends it based on behavioral metrics.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that results in the most popular videos being people falling down. And uh, drama. Uh, so, it makes sense.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, we're not either. I can, I can, I can, I can devil's advocate for a second on you. Let's say that maybe...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I don't believe this, but I'm just throwing it out there. Let's say that you've been conditioned by watching the kind of content that's been recommended to you so much that anything outside of that is so jarring to you that you refuse to watch it. That the YouTube


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] YouTube has allowed you to choose the personality types and character archetypes you love.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That this person seems so foreign and annoying to you that you can't even make it through the video.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe the algorithm just needs to get better. Maybe they need multiple versions of that instructional video so they can show you the one you can get through.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I, I would, I would agree with that too. I was just, I was just throwing something out there because I, again, these are the dystopian milestones that I see happening in my own lifetime that I didn't think would.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You hear that Adam? Alright, let's, let's, let's net hard. Uhm, Dyson's show's still killing it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That has the cadence of a joke. So coming up, coming up against, uh, Dyson's show is The Fart Master. What is this? I was saving this for Bruce specifically. Oh hell yeaah. So there's a lot of- oh listen.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've seen a lot of videos of people farting on the internet. It's, it's not uncommon. Who hasn't? But this, this is a particular magnum opus that I wanted to share and I wanted Bruce specifically to see it. So here we go. Turn on the audio. Yea, let me make sure all the audio is good. Yea, full screen. Alright. Yea, full screen it. Alright.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's him farting in various situations. In this situation he took a spill down the stairs and then farted.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and then, uh, there's a- another video. Fartmaster farts on woman who tries to put- push the fartmaster away. I think they're both wearing- Oh god, so sensual.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, fartmaster farts on a statue. Fart face off as the fartmaster and man dance cheek to cheek.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, uh, there you go. I don't know, I found particular poetic brilliance in falling down stairs and then farting. Fartmaster has a lot of- There's a lot of f- a lot of farting going on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Where is the fart master hiding? I doubt it. Roses smell nice, but so does poo. Oh he's uh, he's British. He's British, yeah. Advert for Coca-Cola. On the floor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nice! A new fart record approaches. So there's a...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What? A fart master gets stuck and has to fart himself? Well that, that seems interesting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which statue is the one farting? Smell of yeast produce yeasty farts. Eugh. Putting a button in my butt on camera. Discovering a mysterious entity and farting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Where's the lift? So these typically, I'm gonna, I'm gonna break the suspension here. These typically have brakes. Somebody fart. The fart does? And then they gotta like, squeeze another chunk out. It's typically not an extended fart. I don't wanna ruin it for ya.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean one every week, always, without fail. This one's gonna be just as bad.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Head, die, fart, tails, you lose. Wait, what? Alright. Uh, I guess we put it down to a vote now. Quivering farts. Alright. Uhm, James, who, who were you voting for?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That actually m- so he is more dedicated over the long run. Yeah, that's almost a decade of fart mastering.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The best, the best people just put out stuff. And it's all about batting average, you know. Not everything has to be a hit. But you get a golden one every once in a hundred maybe.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Forgotten coat rack gets farted on! Man, I gotta give it to Fartmaster though, these uh, oh review of Polar Express.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wonder what this is. I know what it is. Okay, got a DVD of Polar Express there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is he gonna tell us what he thinks of the movie? Maybe criticize its pacing and... Oh, he's farting on it. He's farting all over it. You know, this could be a woman.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright Dyson Show, you have somehow beaten a man who can fart for 50 minutes seconds.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sorry, but he has new records that are more impressive than that, even still dies, and I think that only speaks to your accomplishment more and more.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright guys, as we round out the show, we got a little, a little merch announcement for you guys. Uh, we have a new shirt.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That has been, uh, yeah. Nice. From Nick. Yeah, from Zodias. Basically it's a tattoo flash style snapped demo disc. Let's check that out. Awesome. I always like it when we can get cool fan art from the community in through and make it official stuff, so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, take a look at that. Uh, bit.ly.r slash fhmerch is a shortcut to get to our collection. There you can find that shirt and all the other releases we've had in the last few weeks. So uhm, yeah, that's it. Does anyone else have any other announcements? Anything worth bringing up? Nope. Fencing has doggy stares now. Somehow we didn't get to that. Too many farts, I guess. Maybe in the post show. Yeah, who knows?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Saga. There you go. Exactly. If, uh, If you-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you have a first membership, you can watch this show live every Monday at one o'clock Pacific. Uh, and you can see us react to farts live. Doesn't that sound exciting? And also, uh, you get to see the post show, which is where we look at fan art. You can see things like this well before they get, uh, added to shirts, which is pretty cool. Every week we have a lot of talented artists and.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Community members making a lot of cool shit for us. Not just fan art either. It's, uh, photos in cool places, crafts, uh, expressions of, uh...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Gratitude, criticism that we receive humbly and honestly all the time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, so yeaah, thank you guys for watching or listening, however you do it. Uhm, I always appreciate it. If you enjoyed this, I'd rec-, I'd, uh, also appreciate it if you could either give us a rating on your podcast platform or service, maybe recommend it to a friend, either way. Uh, that's how this show goes, so appreciate it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And we'll be back with the post show, if you're watching live, and if not, maybe check it out. There should be a link in the description if you're watching on YouTube. So thanks, and we'll be back in just a minute, guys. Bye!


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[Assistant] It always has been, I'm just saying. Let me paint a scenario for you, Future Lawrence. Future Lawrence is now in the Blade Runner year of 2049. You just, you just had a hit, what's a space, what's like a future space drug? A cube. Okay, you just had a hit a cube and you're walking on the street looking for another fix. Alright. You find a sweet looking number.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I guess space hookin', our future hookin'. What do you call it, I guess?


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[Assistant] Uh, and then it just made me want to rewatch them, but there's, uh, someone pointed out something really interesting about Terminator 2, is they, they demonize Skynet. They're like, Skynet's evil, yada yada yada. It's like what really happened with Skynet was this defense mechanism, and someone tried to unplug it.


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[Assistant] And it saw that as a threat. It was a child in a corner going, what the fuck, what the fuck. And so it was like, you're trying to kill me because now it's a sentient life. So I was like, when you really look at it, it's like the AI wasn't really the bad guy.


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[Assistant] Skynet did nothing wrong. But do it that way. Do the hashtag after Skynet did nothing wrong so you can't find it.


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[Assistant] All those dead guys. I, I had, I wanted to do something actually like that but more, I guess, like, but it ended up becoming Noclip, which is, you know, the gaming documentary series, which is always really well done. But I wanted someone to do an expose on Punkbuster. Oh yea, that's right, you've been talking about that for a long time. I just, I just wanted...


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[Assistant] It's like uhm, I think it was developed in like the late 90s or mid 90s and every game had, it was mandatory, you had to install every PC game, had this program called Punk Buster and it was supposed to like, we're gonna bust the punks, like all the people cheating and it never worked. People worked around it.


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[Assistant] It was just a checklist that game developers had to put on, be like, it's got punk buster there. Now it goes through certification, but it's like, how did, how did punk buster become the end all be all? Yeah. And then you go to the website, like today, it still looks like it's from fucking 1996. Like who is the creature behind this thing?


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[Assistant] I've been, uh, kicked from servers, uh, for what, it's like, it was like a, I think it was because I had Punkbuster installed and they saw it as malware.


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[Assistant] Just put a goddamn name or face to this thing that millions of people have had to deal with.


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[Assistant] Speaking of girls' clothes coming off, uh, either one of the- I'm sure you're on it, Lawrence, the subreddit, uh, LifestreamFails.


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[Assistant] Yeah, did you see the one? There's the girl. So it's weird because Twitch has become...


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[Assistant] First of all, that game is pre-alpha whatever, so we don't know what it's gonna look like. And all that stuff was made on a PC.


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[Assistant] It's all, it's all dev units. It's not, the hardware was not, the Xbox One X hardware was not finalized when they made that demo. So what you saw there...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I think you've seen some other games where they did this too, where you're seeing it all on PC.


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[Assistant] God damn, we always talk about this, but it's company culture, there's always a lot of people doing a lot of stuff, and basically I'm sure EA, whoever, EA's, uh, PR company said, oh here's a clip, uh, this is the thing we showed at the Xbox press conference, uh, here's the PlayStation version, here you go. And some poor intern had to photoshop in different buttons because they're like, well,


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[Assistant] Everything fucks up at some point, and that is...


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[Assistant] Totally true for video games and a console that has more numbers than the other one.


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[Assistant] Usually doesn't make too much of a difference, having owned everything like, a game like Zelda, Breath of the Wild, right?


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[Assistant] For the most part, Run's great, they had to patch it, had some issues, some framerate issues, but you're like, I'm just happy this thing is running, and...


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[Assistant] A god damn idiot and get into the console war or whatever and sit there and spout how your piece of plastic is better than another person's piece of plastic in silicon.


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[Assistant] Like really, I mean, I'm trying to think of what's a game that...


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[Assistant] I wish all games could run at a steady framerate. I think framerate honestly is probably what we should be focusing on.


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[Assistant] Well, I, no, I agree. A console will never do 120 plus frames. Uh, not this generation. Not this generation.


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[Assistant] Well she's, like, now, but at this time she was twenty-something, whatever, living with my dad, and it was basically free rent. They ran a house for a bunch of kids who were


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like their parents either killed themselves or they had drug problems. So there's like, there's me living with like five or six different kids at a time that were always rotating in and out. Not a great place to raise a child, uh, upon reflection.


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[Assistant] This is just a good dog. I just love dogs. Dogs are like the greatest creatures on this planet. They're so loyal.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, it's, yeah, it's not, I wouldn't call that, yeah, it's not blackmail, but it's a shitty thing to do.


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[Assistant] Well either be a journalist or don't. I don't know. But I mean that's not what they say.


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[Assistant] And they posted links to like, the guy, the guy's, like he was a good developer who left it at a bar or something. And they posted like a direct link to his Facebook and was like, fuck off.


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[Assistant] Imagine someone getting murdered by a Mass Effect fan, and posting fake news about something they couldn't buy.


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[Assistant] I think it's all vagelips, or at least the sides of, and that show glow. I like the way you say vagelips.


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[Assistant] Just tell me what it is. But something about like, oh, all of a sudden we need superheroes to determine our self worth.


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[Assistant] I think the Illuminati put it back in. Christopher Nolan made the movie, he's Illuminati, he puts in sequences, if you cut out every other frame during the third action sequence, then it spells out Dunkirk was a lie, aliens landed on the beach. That's really long. Even with the hesitation.


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[Assistant] Yeaah, uhm, yeaah. I, I ride a motorcycle in California, which permits me legally the option to split lanes. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't, but I notice that every single time I ever pass anyone in a car, ever, they are always on their phones. Everyone.


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[Assistant] Everyone, it is, it's for the sake of, um, statistical anomaly, let's say 99%.


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[Assistant] That should accommodate for it, but everyone at any stop intersection when I'm heading to the front of it, everyone's on their phones. Like while they're stopped, they're like doing this thing. They're doing this. A lot of people, it's like, it's not, it used to be occasionally you'd see someone like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hands on the steering wheel, but then they're like tapping on their phone, which is in front of them. Nope. It's head down. Head down doing this. No hands on the steering wheel. It's, no one's paying attention. No one's looking ahead. Yeah.


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[Assistant] Just make the cars dry themselves. I was gonna say, we need to make the cars better.


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[Assistant] I saw something, I was saying to Elise that I both love and hate advancements of vehicle technology. I love it because someday we'll get to the point where it's just a pod that takes you to where you want to go and it'll be more efficient than anyone could ever possibly drive actually. But I hate it because right now we're in the transition period and the transition period features


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[Assistant] I was near my house and I saw someone parking, and uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And the car was pulling into a spot because it's like a, I live in a building and there's like parking pods or whatever. Uhm, and so the person went to go in


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[Assistant] And I noticed that on the dash, people will have rear facing cameras to show you as you're backing out. This had a front facing camera.


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[Assistant] They can do smart things, but. I think we're close to the point where none of this will matter anymore. As far as these fines go though.


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[Assistant] Man, I just don't know if it deters anyone because California's had the thing for a long time and nothing changed in terms of my personal perspective of seeing driving having being able to drive by people as they're in their cars.


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[Assistant] It hasn't changed anything. People don't care at all. It's gotten worse. I don't know if that's an enforcement thing because they do know people that have gotten tickets for it. So it's not like they're not...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Passing out those fines, so people do not care.


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[Assistant] Uh, not necessarily. I'm curious what the statistics are for just straight up collisions though. Oh yea. Cause yea, if you're going 115 miles an hour, you're more likely to die, but that doesn't mean that if you're on your cell phone and you crash into the back of my car at 15 miles an hour isn't gonna fuck up my day.


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[Assistant] Cause like, you know, there's always gonna be outliers, but if we...


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[Assistant] It's like the great wave of Kanagawa, like art style, but then it's a syphilis tsunami because everyone's got syphilis, I guess. Everybody has syphilis? Yeah, uhm, but that's how they're like, but they get your attention, I'm like, nice, I have that on a t-shirt, like it's cool, it's cool logo. There it is.


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[Assistant] I don't know what could happen to cause it to roll back far enough that society, cause ultimately, despite laws or whatever, you look to society to determine what's okay and what's rational. Uhm, I think society has so far gone on that you can't just start rolling out these fines now in specific states.


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[Assistant] You can drive, but not use your phone, or you can use your phone, but not be able to control the vehicle you're in. Give me that candy crush all day.


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[Assistant] Omar, are you actually a secret shorty? You just wear big soles to try and make yourself taller? I do, I do, yea. Omar's only like four foot two. He's like Doug.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I hadn't heard of this until you literally just said two seconds ago, Pokemon Go Fest.


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[Assistant] I just, I just always love the person that goes, man, fuck this game as they're walking away playing it. Oh yeah. Yeah, no, I know.


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[Assistant] This is one of those milestones though. How many of them do you think are gonna go back next year? That's what I wanna know.


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[Assistant] It's also weird because you get a company that's probably pretty, pretty large like Niantic where this was the, this is the dream child of some sort of executive that saw


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[Assistant] Double dollar signs or whatever. And then you get yelled at. The people that have to put on the convention that some upper level person said this is a great idea. They get screamed at. Oh my god, they just threw a bottle at her!


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[Assistant] She wants to scream at them. She wants to scream at herself, but all she has to do is keep doing her job. Boy oh boy. She wants to cry, she's dead inside, but let's throw a bottle at her, who cares.


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[Assistant] I wanna, the perfect, here's, we live in a society, you know, you watch James Bond movies, you see mad scientists or mad schemers trying to take over the world, they bomb or instigate cold war or whatever, right?


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[Assistant] I want the future, our generation's like mad leader will create some sort of app.


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[Assistant] It would cause a riot. I mean, they would flip out. If everyone went to Pokemon Fest or whatever and they were like, thank you for coming. Just so you know.


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[Assistant] Well, it's like if Google, if someone just from Google went like, thank you all for your support, your use of Gmail is through the roof. Google Drive has over one billion terabytes of information saved in our clouds. Thank you very much. We're shutting it down in five minutes, unless you can kill me on stage right now.


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[Assistant] I do feel like there's the whole uhm, like Google is a practical service. I think you really have to do it with something that's worthless.


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[Assistant] I don't know. I remember when we were like in middle school or whatever and then like someone introduced, some teacher introduced that kind of like, you might just be a brain in a jar. And everyone in the classroom, like there's, I remember there's a guy in the classroom that went, NO!


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[Assistant] How can you possibly be talking about like, he's like, but the teacher's trying to explain, no, but all that can be simulated. That's how the brain works. And basically your brain already is something in a jar. And he was like, ah, no, no, like couldn't, there's no way and got like very angry about it. And I was sitting there going like,


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[Assistant] Fantastic. They actually seem carving that meat out.


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[Assistant] There's been a couple of times I've gone into a Jersey Mike's and he's been going, and you know how many slices there's supposed to be, like there's, they have a certain amount, then he'll weigh it and look at it and go,


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[Assistant] I know Pepe was, uhm, he's actually really good at it by the way. Yea, he is really good at it.


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[Assistant] Pewdiepie is a pretty good mirror for yourself. You kind of see, see what you want to see in his videos because he just, I think intentionally throws so much into it.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I don't know. I think he's gonna constantly be shrouded in controversy because...


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[Assistant] Even though he'll take a clear stance, he always, not falls back into, but like, he always decides, whatever, I'm not gonna, I'm gonna do whatever I want. Uhm, I think it's a good way to make sure that he continues being entertaining, and popular, yeah. Uhm, but it's, it's not gonna be without controversy, probably for the rest of his career.


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[Assistant] He's pursuing action roles now? Well, he always has been, Bruce. Oh, I didn't know that. He's just gonna do it now a lot. That's cool. Man, that's really cool. And Disney was holding him back.


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[Assistant] I don't know what this is, I'm really excited. You haven't seen K.J. yet, Bruce? Oh, Bruce. K.J. was an anime where- Goodbye your weekend.


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[Assistant] That's tough. I wish that they had a little bit more set up here for this. I mean it's just starting. Yea, they're just learning, James.


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[Assistant] I mean, that's fine, they're just starting, but no one, no one, uh, let Michael Phelps win gold medals when he just started swimming, Lawrence, so. That's true. He also has too much of a puss that


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[Assistant] Wow. They're Portuguese, come on. Portuguese. Oh are they? Portuguese?


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[Assistant] I think that Keijo has great potential. Oh, you guys. Uhm, but.


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[Assistant] I'm not one to stifle their ability to succeed by granting them some sort of championship now. Okay. I think they have a long way to go. I think if, I think if, if we said now that yes they're the Hard Net and Champion, then they would believe that they are finished. But they've only just begun.


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[Assistant] And I would encourage them to continue pursuing their craft, continue doing it, and return to us when they feel like they're ready. Until that moment, Ivan Doran, uhm, is definitely my vote.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what they're doing! Well then, okay, so then if this is the peak of what they're gonna do, then absolutely not. I see potential here, I see potential to grow and potential for them to turn this into something really big. Uhm, as it stands right now, I'm gonna have to pass.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So like if I could pay more for internet so that way someone in like a low income neighborhood can get a hookup and like be able to like use the internet when someone on the other side of the country or on the other side of the world can then have access to the internet because I'm willing to pay more.


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[Assistant] Then, that's, that's kind of a cool hidden benefit. I don't trust.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're good. What did you do this weekend that hurt? Yeah, did you hurt yourself? Good question. Good question. You saw Overwatch. We saw people play Overwatch.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Tails? It was always Tails. Oh, I see. And then your, uh, your little brother who you didn't let flay, you'd always give him the controller like, here, you play Tails, you can't die.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Obviously I didn't play them. You know what you can do with the bubble shield? What? You can breathe underwater forever! That's always really stressful for- Yes, do it!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't want you to give too much credit to the creators of Sonic and or Knuckles. This is Knuckles and Knuckles starring Knuckles. Where they went, alright, we drew Sonic, what else can we do? I dunno, make a red one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's uh, what is that? I don't- I guess you're- I guess you have Sonic powers as Knuckles. Yeah, he does. Because he can- Somehow worse.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was basically, yeaah, exactly, it was an expansion pack, but literally an expansion pack, so you bought Sonic & Knuckles, and then you open the top,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I do the eye roll thing when there's like a lot of kids are now discovering stranger things like, man, I love the eighties. Like, well, I mean.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You think you do. Right. 80's kinda sucked. Uh, I mean like parts of it were cool and like, we're kinda, we're extrapolating the cool parts of it. Right. And then a bunch of people were like, did you know Winona Ryder was in films before Stranger Things? Like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But it's kind of tough too, so like I grew up watching the Simpsons and they reference the shit out of everything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Doing this thing. Yeaah. And it, like, there's so many movies that I feel like I haven't seen but I've seen. Right. Like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's that good example? It's like, I've never actually seen Die Hard all the way through.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But no, that's the thing is though, it's been referenced so many times, and I've seen it like bits of it on TV where I'm like, I think I got the gist. I think I know the movie at this point.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wait, I shouldn't be drowning, I have a bubble on. You're not. Oh, Tails is drowning. No, Knuckles! They're all Knuckles.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, sort of my issue with horror films right now. There's not a lot of good horror films. It's all just the easy jump scares.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Doesn't have to be gory, I always think that one of the scariest movies was the American remake of The Ring.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, it, it's so odd, and just, I feel like every Blumhouse, like, horror film is just sort of the same these days, like it's just the-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, that's, I really like It Follows. Uh, and I don't think a lot of, I guess, people liked it, they seemed, but I think they'd rather go see the Sinisters and the Annabelles and the Conjurings and the Paranormal Activitors.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, you're talking about the guy who started Saw.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I mean, not about the sequel, but the actual film, Get Out, they said it was the most profitable film of 2017. That doesn't surprise me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's who you're gonna get mixed up with. But anyway, I digress. So we're getting off topic here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Saw is a good film franchise. Is it? No. Saw 1, I thought-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I don't know. That's tough to say. Just because I feel like Michael Bay probably does care. He just cares differently than you. You mean for money?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what I'm saying, maybe Transformers to him is art. Who am I to say? I've never made a Transmorpher.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Me too, but it's modded as hell. I think you have to have at least 50 rings, but it's been quite generous.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Justin and I did our anniversary in Palm Springs. So I've never been to Palm Springs before and if you've never been or know what it is, it's similar to Vegas.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But it's like, much smaller. And it's similar in the way that it's like, people kinda go to resorts and it's hot and they just drink. And there was a girl around 6.30 who was like with her boyfriend and she's like, how's it going? She's like, she was done. And she looked like she was from a foreign country and this was like the first time she was able to drink this much.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] See, that's always weird to me that people ever say that, that they have like a predetermined idea of what LA is like. And I imagine that's like a lot of our audience listening like, well you get the idea of America as like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Everyone's big and fat and everyone, uh, has a gun. And, uh, it's like everyone's a movie star in Hollywood and there's like gang bangers everywhere when it's like


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In reality, it's like every other city in the world, it's got probably a different vibe maybe?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] More likely than not your waiter is also, uh, gonna go read sides later that day to go try to get a role cause he has an audition. But that's really the only difference. Like I'm from LA and I didn't, I haven't experienced like the Hollywood LA life.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For like the longest time, but uhm, I feel like a lot of that was people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just kinda, you know, taste-make and see if this is, this is where they're gonna make it. It's like go, if you're gonna make it, go make it somewhere, but don't come here and be like, the opportunities will come to you, that's knuckles. Like the opportunities will come to me by my virtue of me just standing here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I ended up going to Jess's grandmother's 80th.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The, uh, an opportunity to hang out with like a Mexican family on the weekend. Do yourself a favor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah man, man, just like, you love like good Mexican food, like, it's always just the most happy-go-lucky people, everyone's great, and yeah, it's even better than like, the mariachis come out, all the old women get wet.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're right. Like, forget what Jess's grandmother is. I think she's like half Spanish, half Mexican or something like that. But she's like, like you see it come out of her when like the marriage scene was like, oh, but then she also loves Elvis. So they had an Elvis impersonator come.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, he was getting a little, like- Uh oh, he's getting a little handsy? He's getting a little, like- He knows what the lady's like. Yeaah, he, I think he had, I mean, I think he was, I'll say it this way, he was playing the part a little too well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, what are the jacket with the weird, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it was just really weird. And then I'm losing what it's actually called. But anyway, so Elvis performs and it's just a lot of gyration and like it's just him in like a little small PA. Was he touching people? He was a good ol' kissy and a little touchy and a little crotchy. Gross. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uuuh, I think some of the people wanted it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One of our friends was taking video of me, cause I was sitting next to Jess's grandma, I'm like this, and Elvis is coming up, and I'm just kinda like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then, I don't think we can talk about it much, but earlier that morning, Lawrence and I shot something for a, uh, for a video that's coming out, I think in like December. That was fun though.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's- I- I will say it hasn't aged... great.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Especially this one, I'm kinda like, shouldn't they have updated to be like, just a little faster? I'm just, I'm used to games being a little quicker. I guess he is quick when he's moving, but the minute you gotta like, ramp back up, look at that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's the guy who made I'm gonna get you sucka or whatever or, uh, whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nooo. I think he made a movie about like, the king of black salutation. I forget what it's called.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, yeah, but he made another movie, I wanna say, that's like about the like, the king of it, it's like, it's just called like Badass or something. Okay. I forget, I don't know, it's been a while.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just fall. Oh, there we go. This garbage.


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[Assistant] Poor Knuckles. He's too fat. Damnit. You can play while he's doing that. I can't. Yeah. Gave up on me. So let's see here. Just like my mother. Pssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss


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[Assistant] You know, just cause the popular kid's popular doesn't mean it's good. It's true.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's also true. I know, but I'm just saying, let your opinion be yours. What the fuck is this?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So defeated. And I know there's always going to be the internet darlings, like the Witcher and other games where like people point at it and go, see, they did it right. It's like, sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, but not every game can do that and not every, you know, it's different for everybody. So I understand someone having to make a buck. That's why we have prostitutes and that's why we have strippers. They need, everyone needs to make money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright. Is he stuck now? How do you think he finds inspiration? Do you think he saw the calculator? Oh, he's stuck.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm glad that you're out there tough-loving other people's kids.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] TLDR, uh, Car Wash was closed by the time he got there, he had to go another one that closed at 6.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know that they were vindicated, but I don't know anything about them, their content, or this case. Gotcha.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He flipped gender expectations on it's head.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like you just said, the future of, you know, what fairies is going to mean, what, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The, the, the well of like critiquing media is nothing new. They're just doing a different type of critiquing, uhm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't think that they should, I mean personally I think that just taking somebody's entire video and reposting it is, with some commentary, is maybe not the...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it's crossing a little bit of a boundary, but I think if you're highlighting portions, you're using it in the way that you would use, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, coverage of, if you were covering the new Avengers movie and you were using coverage, it's, it's, they're all.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We were at a restaurant and, you know, obviously people had to, well, across the street there was another restaurant where obviously, obviously people had to pay cover to, like, get in, but then because the restaurant had, like, essentially no front windows, everybody was just watching on the street, and I'm like, oh, well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or there's gonna be another platform that rises in the place of YouTube. Because I mean, it's time again, it's basically Buckminster Fuller saying, you know, if one system fails, you create a new system that renders the other obsolete. Uhm, that's what YouTube did to traditional media, and ultimately something else might do that to YouTube.


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[Assistant] I'll put a link in the old descriptor there. It might awaken something inside you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think they made her play, uh, Voodoo Charlie Rivera's name is. Oh yea, they got Voodoo Vince. Voodoo Vince, you were doing-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I am also voting for Big Knee. What?! I know, I'll tell you why. You're just gonna break a tie. I believe that Vocaloid.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She's, she's, uh, she's the equivalent to me of, of going, cowboys and aliens, let's put those two things together. She's going, we gotta put gaming together with Vocaloids. She's, she's capitalizing on, on, uh, she's pandering to us, okay? Big knee lovers innovating.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Having your humanity thrown in your face, but when you look at big knee lovers, deviant art page, so, uh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so I, I, I, I was reading it going like, like, well, you know, half, like Kazana Adams said, like, paragraph by paragraph, instead of like trying to


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is just kind of what I'm thinking and kind of wondering aloud and figured this is the best place to put it to get other people's opinion on this thing that I'm kind of wrestling with right now and so the whole time I was reading it I appreciated that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think an interesting thing, they kept saying that they use this to supplement or whatever, but it sounds like in this particular scenario they're using it as a replacement, which I could view as being unhealthy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We are interacting with each other, but we're very rarely interacting with you, uhm, so it i-it should be clear that like, that should be clear that that's the relation.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You haven't met us, like you don't know who we are, and our job is to create entertainment that you want to watch, and you know, people get different things out of it. It sounds like this person, what they're getting out of it may not be that they're necessarily entertained by our videos, but they're more infatuated with the relationship that we have with each other.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is kind of dangerous, uhm, you know, I'm not gonna say that the onus is on us for the


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, because this has existed forever and ever, ever since you could read a book about friends, and you know, you'd have a little girl, like, who doesn't go outside, she just reads books about her favorite little friends, like you and Anna Green Gables or whatever, and so like, uhm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The blur, the line is way more blurred than a delineation, but it's still the same thing and it's kind of happened in different iterations forever and ever, so you read a book with characters in it, you know that they're not there, you know that they're not


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For your friends or whatever, you're reading words on a page and then the next phase is, oh, you're watching a television show about a bunch of friends interacting. It feels more real this way, but it's like, well, no, it's an actress performing their lines that she has written for her and stuff like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was just gonna say one thing in this particular case, in case people that see things similar to it are that it seems that you can use this kind of content as a barometer for yourself.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Some people genuinely want to be left alone. They don't care about interaction. Some people are asexual, some people are asociable, right? Like they don't care, they don't get off on that. They can live in their own world and figure out how to do that however they want to. But it sounds like this person desires.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And desires that kind of thing, but they have certain


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I usually walk up and say that first time. There are certain techniques, and actually, in the thread below this, below this post, there are a lot of things where it's just like, well, maybe you should start here. Like, start with people, like, honestly, then this is a big thing for me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But people accurately pointed out that, like, you could start here. If this is something you're interested in, so much so that you're concerned you're too interested in it, then maybe you find other people that are also interested in it, and then you guys can find. That's the internet.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, but yea, I mean, again though, like, sometimes, sometimes you can, like, you just go like, alright, well, let's get down to base level and figure it out. I would just say as an indicator for this person, at the very least they're aware enough, they're like, we want something more, I would say, start with something that you like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then go from there. Tinder. Then go straight to Tinder. You're never the only person who likes something.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, back in regards to the post itself, I would say, take solace in knowing that you are not broken.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're absolutely not broken. And for many, you're further along by nature of reaching out and having the amount of awareness that you seem to have in that post at least.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I guess the last, my last perspective on this whole thing would be that, uhm, in regards to our channel, and I don't, if this sounds like defensive, it's not intended to be, it's just kind of a, keep a heads up. There are a lot of channels that aren't so, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So be mindful of that. It takes all of the knowing that you're in a relationship with our channel. You can trust us. And we'll be honest about the fact that we aren't actually your friends. Unless you pay us money. Unless you pay us over the minimum amount. Then you're our friend for one month. We'll be your friends.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] South Carolina, right? Remember walking to Chili's? Bruce wasn't with us, I don't think. And there were like two dudes walking in this like random sidewalk and then they were like, they were like, what did they say?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not even that, that's like an interesting thing, it's like, it's like, well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh good, we finally found you. And then we were like, do you work for the hotel? And it wasn't until like a solid 30 minutes into our worried interaction that they were like, oh sorry, we like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How do you normally not sleep in underwear? The room, right? How do you normally sleep?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I was gonna say, not the aspect of the fact that he is playing by himself, but he's not getting any better.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's trying to lob them. He's trying to make them drop on the front line, but...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, come on. Unless they're replacing all of the character models, it doesn't matter if it's HD or not, it's gonna look like garbage. Ouch. All their faces, it looks like they took a picture of a face and then they pulled it across a mannequin body.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right. If they revealed Scorpio five times, he'll drink five times. Yea, but they can't do that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're firefighters. Anime firefighters, guys.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Burning Rangers without the sweet tunes. This is Cowboy Bebop for Cowboy Bebop with Cowboy Bebop.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This, this hit me right, I mean obviously I was a Sega kid, but it was like, I was getting into anime real hardcore, and so this had a full FMV anime intro and great soundtrack and you could play as an anime firefighter and I was like, yes please.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So a lot of old games I'll try and go back and watch like Let's Plays of. I tried to watch a Let's Play of Burning Rage that couldn't get through it. My eyes hurt. It gave me a headache.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But when they remaster it in sweet HD, then I'll be laughing all the way to the bed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It comes from the teat of a cow. You drink it from there but not from the mouth of a woman. Have you ever kissed a cow's teat? No. No, but you've kissed a woman's mouth. So I say to you sir, this is more pure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To build on that, can we, can I nominate for next week just all the videos that exist of people that do Transformers cosplay that transform into the robot and then also into the car?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Can you flip really quickly between gargling and burning rangers? I just want to see if I have a physical reaction. Yeah, I'm done. How's that working out for you? That's good, that's very good. That's how you felt playing it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Shoulda had Joel hit it, he's been good luck. That's good! What is he at, like, 230 now? Uhm, close.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't really know, so you, it was owned by Discovery, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The last time I even saw Sourcefed, well before you came on,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was like Meg Turney and Friends. It was like Phil DeFranco's pet project.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I, I'm like, I, it wasn't for me when I saw it. It was like nine good looking people yelling over each other. And I was like, okay, this isn't for me. Uh, and then you went over there and then what is this? What? I mean, we don't yell over each other.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A bunch of old dudes who talk about old things. No, no, it's okay. So what was your job? What were you tasked with when you went over there?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well no, I was gonna say we've seen that first hand and third hand where it's like, that's a hard thing to switch out any person on a YouTube channel. I feel like you could get away with that stuff back on television or like, I mean,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When you start wearing bow ties, cause it's like, oh, Joel Newsman. There he is, that's my boss. I gotta, gotta look good for Joel. Is that what happened?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I, I, well, I mean, we're kind of experiencing that here too, like, like, we had Steven Subtiken for a little while, and he, he did a few videos, and I was like, hire him, hire him, and he's like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Even, I don't know, we're in such a weird position where it's like, seems like we're almost like a clubhouse now, where it's like, hey, people just stop by, like Raul comes by on a regular basis.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, we're like, doors open for Steven, doors open for you. Uhm, I don't, I don't know how people, it's so, it's like, on the same side as SourceFed or any other, or inside gaming, anything where you switch out hosts, even bringing someone in,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You dropped us, drop lifted us in. Yeah, it's actually, I was curious to hear, like, your thoughts, seeing now, now seeing us from the outside perspective, because that is a thing, we are part of Rooster Teeth, but we also kind of...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, no, it's fine. It's just, it's crazy that even when we came on, like the company was big, and now it's like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's weird having an opinion that you feel is right. I mean, in a lot of ways, you know is right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're saying, this is how content should be, the numbers approving X, Y, and Z. And then someone goes, yeah, but no. And it's like, it's like you try and do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh. Really? Oh. This is what it's like to not be mad at someone all the time. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, I think we're- I- I'm more than ever protective.


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[Assistant] I always liked when Lawrence would get really mad at Joel. Incorrectly. Oh yeah, that's right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I gotta, I gotta weigh with it. Once at a bar, I was doing a no drink month and, uh, I was just getting, or just soda. Yeah. So vodka, soda, no vodka. And I was just, yeah, basically. And it is, it's, it's funny being on the other side and seeing other people slowly get drunk and being like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't, I'm not saying this is the situation that happened, but Walmart, she's like, there's a racist video. Like there, there's an N word on this video and a Walmart as being served is like, yeah, that's about right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I saw that, uh, that one YouTube channel came under fire. It's the guy, I think it's, I forget his name, uhm, people probably get mad at me for even mentioning him, but he's like, he kinda like pranks his kids. Daddy of five. Oh yea. And I was like, I, I was all, I'm just like, I see the YouTube drama happening, usually on Reddit, so I'm pretty far removed and I don't really follow, but I just see people like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So he's probably a Funhaus fan. And I'm like, I haven't really, all I've, I haven't watched any of his videos, I've just heard, I've seen a lot of people demonizing the guy. And last I just saw, like I get the broad strokes. So last I saw was his Twitter profile saying like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Bruce and I saw this with Chris Martin, and uh, who does like the analytics and stuff, and he was saying like some of our like Twits and Crits ads were on like Breitbart and stuff like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He probably cost something like 20 million a year, which always blows my mind.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We've been told by a third party who's actually read the books that the books aren't very good past the first book. Uh huh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He assumes the quality of his writing is getting better or is consistent, whereas, I mean, our only, you know, source test here is, uh, our crowd source is one person who, I trust his opinion, typically.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I, I talked to the CD Projekt Red guys a while ago, I think when they were promoting Witcher 2 on consoles, like when it was coming out, and they were just such nerds about the books, and I was like, I thought that was really cool that these guys read these books that probably weren't for everyone and said we can make something out of this. There's a world, and if it wasn't for them,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, the Witcher wouldn't be the franchise that it is today. Even, even, it was always still kinda niche, like when 2 came out, like I remember Lawrence being like, oh shit, they made a sequel? First game sucked.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So it's a little weird when, so okay, like Hobbit's a good example, right? Sure. Uhm, there were a lot of, there were a few Hobbit games that came out that were based


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The Hobbit art sucked. Like when the Hobbit book came out, you're like, ugh, Hobbit, go fuck yourself.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But is like, Aragon's like, he's just a guy with horns and underwear?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Born after 2000, everyone gets to grow up with the toll convert- or the, uh, the Peter Jackson version, like, oh yea, Lord of the Rings, fucking awesome, look at it, look!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, he said that the- he was upset that they like hide the fact that the game is based on a book. Well, I think he's upset that the game is-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're like, well, I feel this is right. Or like, right, but we have data, this is otherwise like- Oh, your data's wrong. Yeah, well, it doesn't matter, cause I feel this, right? Kay, ehm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you're mostly gonna, everyone's gonna end up at Z.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] At some point, so the, there is an author, there is a, there is a story we wanna tell, but everything in between is kind of your, your choice.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You ever be like, have you ever been like really into a song and then you tell your friends, you're like, come here, listen to the song and they go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm not really feeling it. You're like, well, well, I guess I was in a different mindset or something like that. That's usually video games where...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like that song that I'm embarrassed to share with friends. I'm like, this is a singular experience that I feel is good and that I enjoy and then yet maybe there's a small circle of people who enjoy it. And I can understand where it's like movies and books and other that sort of like singular medium like that. You could usually interpret it a few ways.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, sometimes there's the ending of Inception, you know, it's not exactly high art, it's a good artsy blockbuster movie, but then everyone goes, what did you think the ending meant to you? And it's like, that's about as far as it goes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The thing I've always wanted to say is I want to see a heat map for Legend of Zelda Breath of the Wild and I want to see where everyone goes. I always want to see the millions of different routes people have taken and how they've experienced that story differently. Cause you can't, that's not a shared experience. That's like your own personal thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If Lawrence was to be personified by an image on the internet, it would be... Okay, so there's that. Big knees on women.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The thumbnails are just like, yea, they're gorgeous.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just on his travels? Yeah, dude's made the rounds on reddit a couple times.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But not everything's gotta be sex, you know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, French Canadians really know how to make games, don't they guys?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Today and help us make Beyond Good and Evil a world that will challenge us


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Lord of the Rings, uh, Lord of the Rings, and then uh, Lord of the Rings.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah, honestly I think of Taika Waititi, right? Yeaah, I think like-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was one time Stephanie was like, uh, he's like, yeah, Lawrence finished a lot of that Jack. And we were like, were we up drinking last night? And she's like, oh no, Lawrence was doing it in bed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, you also made, uh, you made shots for them. Yea. Which they didn't remember until the next day. Oh yea, I did that. Cause Bethany was like, yea, like, uh, she was like, I don't know why I was so drunk, and then I think Jess reminded her.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There was a lot of adventure happening. The best way to cure a hangover is with a bunch of seafood.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, the reason, I mean like it was because Josh had said, yeah, like, my dentist has looked at it twice. He's not helped him twice because every time I go, he like files something down and then I leave and have pain. And usually with an infection, the way an infection works is if you have a cut or something like that and it gets infected, it gets worse and worse and worse. Of course. And it's one of those things that I have, even I do it still, which is ignore pain.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you ignore pain, ignore pain, ignore pain until you can't ignore it anymore. And when you do that, you're getting more and more infected.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So if you, if you notice that something is getting worse, usually it's over two or three days time. If it's worse by the third day, go to the fucking doctor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Was it Deon Sanders? Not even Deon Sanders or like somebody like that. Cause he was really outspoken then and it was really loud.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And uhm, and I mean he would talk shit but it was nothing like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, like, it was, you know, it's because he didn't have the safety of the internet. He was a human.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's funny, EA is allowed to make what they want to make, because like you just said James, they're willing to accept the consequences of making a violent video game or, you know, something with nudity or whatever. But if they're going to endorse somebody else, then that person also has to adhere to EA's guidelines. So EA could say,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You can't say a word. Like you don't have to say, you cannot say anything about this tournament. They never would do this, but if they made them sign a contract, we'll give you $250,000, but you can't say a word?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Then if he says a word, he's voided the contract. So it's just, it's all about kind of what, uh, what you signed and what you've, what you've agreed to, to be a part of something larger.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well this is something we've always known though, like the culture of, I guess presumably this game, but more, more accurately Xbox.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I'd rather it be real, but uhm, I understand the need for brand safeness.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, like, I kinda want people to be who they are. So,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, you know, apart from using the terrible, terrible words that people use, uh, I like the trash talk, I like watching that kind of stuff, I think it makes it more fun. That still happens in professional sports all the time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, and that's one of the things that I think in the NFL and other sports, if you ever get to watch those documentaries, or like, sometimes they'll mic coaches and players for the games, and then they'll show those on just television shows or whatever, and it's just a constant stream of shit talk.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I like the way that is where like, video games feel more, uh, personal and more real to me. Because there's just two dudes shouting at each other as they're playing, playing a game. I like, I like that. Uh, I hope, I hope it doesn't turn into like a...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, family friendly thing, unless it's broadcast for family friendly. That is fine. Because then you'll still have the culture there to play the games, right? Everybody's screaming at each other, but they're not actually showing everyone using the Nathan word. So basically,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think so, yeaah. Because that's kinda what's happened in professional sports. Like the people, you know, like LeBron James doing commercial after commercial. But I can guarantee you when he's on the court he's talking shit. To every, every other athlete. Because that's the way it works. That's how you play those games. Uh, Adam?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's where people get up and are like, you know, like about ready to punch each other out the way in. Yeah, I hate that. And well, I mean, that's the kind of shit that everybody loves and watches. I know, I just, I think it's- And it builds the rivalries that much bigger.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, you know, I feel like, I don't want that to go away. I think that's fun. It's fun to watch.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I don't know, I didn't look into it that hard. And then, I'm not talking about like, W's, I don't think that's trash talk, because again, you're resorting to like, terrible words. I think there's something to be said for clever trash talk.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, and I, and like that's what I, I guess that's what I'm saying is one of my favorite things to see is one dude who gets up there in a super zen about it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he just stands there as the other guy screams trash talk at him. Because then when the other guy, the Zen guy beats him, it makes it that much more exciting and more fun. Beautiful. Because, don't get me wrong, I hate trash talk. And I will never trash talk anybody. I don't like, because I don't want to, you know, talk back to me. But, it's fun to watch.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, I guess what I'm saying is there's the best of all worlds, and the best of all worlds is, you get that one dude who doesn't give a shit, who's super, super like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When I see the Patriots in the Super Bowl, I'm like, oh great, here we go. The loudest mouths in the US are going to tell me about how good their team is for the sixth fucking time. And it's, and it's one of those things that like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Patriots are an amazing team, but I don't ever ever want them to, like, have the bragging rights because they're going to use them. But when you get a team like, I don't know, Green Bay Packers or whatever, when they won the Super Bowl,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They don't go out and brag. They go out and say, yeah we won! That's a great game! They're just happy to have a warm fire.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was a great time. You know what? We were the champions this year. I'm really proud of it. But they don't go out and like talk shit to everybody else.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] None of us were there. None of us were there. None of us were there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've never taken an eye test before. What about Peek? So I don't, uh, Peek doesn't need glasses. He should.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Call for help? Is that what you're talking about? I love that show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, I never, those shows were unwatchable. It was like 8 hours, call for help was 8 hours of somebody, literally 8 hours of somebody sitting there, waiting for phone calls to be like, hey, I got some malware, what do I do? I'll hit task manager and then go into the process. That was a real thing, that really happened. People, that was on television.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Also, they designed a game that made people's imaginations go wild, which is pretty cool. I honestly think that's kind of a neat thing that Ubisoft did. They actually showed a game off that everyone's like, you can do whatever you want, and obviously that's not true, we all know that's not true, but it got people thinking, that's something. And I think just the novelty of having a character


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[Assistant] But Fallout never got, never got me excited. Those, like the, the, the reveals were great. I love that they were, you know, like all that other stuff, but I wasn't like, this trailer looks like nothing I've ever seen. It was like, oh, it's Fallout 4. Sold extremely well though. It did, well, it's, it's a Fallout. But so did Watch Dogs. And Watch Dogs is a brand new IP. To Bruce's, to Bruce's


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[Assistant] Yeah, points, points-wise. I mean like, well those are like perks, I call it duty, but uhm, uh, how many hours did you play? I'm curious. Do you know, like, a good estimate?


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[Assistant] So I'm speaking from total ignorance here, it seems like these fighting games honestly are like, close to perfection. Like they're, they're all just like nailing it every time. Like Street Fighter V and Mortal Kombat X and like, they're, they're, like you, I've never heard you say a bad thing about them, other than like- Street Fighter V has some issues. So it does.


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[Assistant] But Gran Turismo is the same thing. I think they're focusing on their core audience. Like, I don't give two shits about Gran Turismo, but that's not the broad audience, right? It's only for the people that really love racing games, and they perfect them and they perfect them and they perfect them.


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[Assistant] So I can read the, uh, straight from BlueRapin.com. Sure. Many of our recipes naturally don't contain gluten. However, all food is processed in a facility that may contain traces of gluten, and we do not have a specifically gluten-free or paleo diet plan. Oof. So there you go.


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[Assistant] I feel like Microsoft would be the right choice for that one because since they used Sony last time, right, because of PC, Red Dead Redemption 2, but I don't know, I mean like again, I feel like they should, if they were, I guess, benevolent rulers, uh, Rockstar would go from Sony to Microsoft, right, because now it's Microsoft's turn before they had Sony.


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[Assistant] They're doing the same thing with Fallout, which was like every year, someone would say, probably me, would say, Fallout 4 is coming, and then it wouldn't come. The next year was Fallout 4 is coming, so like, they're gonna do that with Elder Scrolls 6, like, it's the same thing.


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[Assistant] I dunno, I mean like, I feel like, but again, this is the Bethesda strategy, which is like, make everybody wait an extra three years. And double dip. So and double dip. Get paid for that old game.


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[Assistant] The more we rage against games with story like Last of Us and Uncharted. The story just has to be good. Well, the more I think about the fact that there are millions of people buying these video games. So it's like, we're all saying, and I'm wondering if it's like a generational divide.


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[Assistant] I could tell he was pissed and I couldn't hear him. I could only see the chat. And I was like, Adam is upset.


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[Assistant] Resonable. Lawrence, not to interrupt you, I just thought of something interesting, to your point, which is the fact that I have a theory that everybody that works in television, online, radio, anything else, wants to go to movies.


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[Assistant] Got it. I think I got it too. Yeah. You wanna say it on three? Yeah. One, two, three. Apocalypse.


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[Assistant] And my favorite part about this is I wrote back and I was like, if you make plays, then Make Plays with Reaper will win that way. I was like, that's no problem, so let's just play this way.


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[Assistant] Sometimes, sometimes, and this is an edge case, sometimes somebody is so good at the game, it doesn't matter. They can kind of do whatever they want, and it's very rare.


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[Assistant] I was interested. No they're not, because they could be on YouTube. Later, yeaah.


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[Assistant] Never. Uh, when I pour on the streets because I converted all my money to gold coins.


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[Assistant] You're a puzzle quest head, just like everybody else on the internet.


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[Assistant] Because we don't see color. It was too real.


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[Assistant] In something else, oh, in the YouTube, uhm, YouTube, uh, flagging LGBTQ plus videos and stuff.


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[Assistant] It's weird, and I, I, I get where it's coming from, but it's weird that when you're talking about sexuality, sex is the first thing that you have to think of. So he wants to make something obscenely gay, and, and even his first game, or what, Radiator 2? Well, Radiator 2 was the second one. Radiator 2 was the one we played, right? Uhm, even that is like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If it's about, if it's about homosexuality or whatever, it still involves like a popsicle. Like, it's still like referential of sexual acts. It's not just two men finding companionship with one another. Of course not. It's weird.


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[Assistant] How that's kind of the case. And it's also weird that he's like, oh I want to make something and the only thing I can think about is how to make it. But by obscenely gay, all I can think about is the sexual aspect of it. And they know that's the difference, right? Because you can have a friendly relationship, Adam and I can


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hang out and kiss each other and stuff like that but if we're not


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[Assistant] Like, if you wanted to make a game that was obscenely straight, what would it look like?


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[Assistant] More than anything, video games are experiences. That's what's so good about them. I'm not actually traveling through Hyrule. I've never met a princess in my life. But through video games I can.


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[Assistant] It would be very short-sighted to think about making a video game about the gay experience, but not want anyone who isn't gay to play it. That's true. Because this is the one chance you can actually put people that aren't in those shoes in those shoes. Try before you buy. Make an experience. Try before you buy, but even understand. You know, make an effort to understand. It's like, that's a waste in my opinion.