[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah. And all three of the Banks boys are doctors. That's what's wild. Wow. They had three sons. That is pretty cool. They had three sons. They're all medical doctors.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But speaking of football, I was sitting over here while we were waiting and, uh, I saw some news that just happened. I saw OJ Simpson passed away.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I just thought it was interesting because Sai has a very interesting take on OJ. So that's why.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There you go. I was five, so I don't really have an opinion.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, you don't either. You want him to be your attorney. He's the only man I've ever seen make a judge laugh on the stands. You won't sigh. You won't sigh on this side.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you won't sigh on this side. You don't want him over making a decision because he's a loose cannon on that end. You want him on your.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause everybody's going to be so distracted that they're like, huh?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Come on. Put him on a Supreme Court, baby.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Si, your birthday is in just a couple of weeks.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I know you can back up 10 months and y'all had something really special going on there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The April is just when y'all were calved. We'll call Carter if we need to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey, there you go. Hey, you're 76. You can do what you want. I don't care. But no, I thought, I didn't know if we'd ever touched on Sy's opinion on OJ. I thought that was a fun one to go down.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, here's what I remember. It's one of those funny things. It had so much coverage. That is a core memory for, for me. Like I still cannot see a white square body Bronco driving down the road and not think of OJ sense. That's one of those weird, that was things.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. And so that was one of those core memories.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That I remember thinking like, I don't know, here's what I'd say to this. I don't know how he didn't do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But in the words of Sai, they did create a reasonable doubt that he did. Now, whether or not you like that or not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It is our system. It is the system in the United States. And one day you may be the beneficiary of that said system. So I'm not gonna knock it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm just going to say they, they worked the system. They exploited the system for what it is, which is what I think all people that are great in their field do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Side by side be a hung jury.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So what's worse in your opinion? Letting somebody go or murder that may have done it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm sitting here, I asked a question that I didn't even know an answer to. I don't know if it's worse. I'm now I'm like, is it worse for a guilty man to go free or an innocent man to be locked up?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, and even the repenting and doing that, he's still gonna answer for it. Like, I mean, the question will still be asked and you still answer for everything you've done.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I always, I say that a lot too. There's, I always say there's a judge and I'm not him. I'm not him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Always an interesting topic, you never know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would say that we went through a world, we, we went through a time where it used to be innocent until proven guilty. And today. Now you're guilty. You're guilty. The accusation sticks in today's world because of social media. That's right. Not murder. Not murder.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In today's world, the accusation sticks. Whether you like it or not, the accusation sticks. There's still people on this world who think Phil Robertson is a horrible man because of some misquoted thing in GQ magazine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what I'm saying. That was my point of today's world being different than it was in the past where you, you were so


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Insulated from and the media wasn't there and the things weren't there that you were in fact innocent unless you were proven guilty. And today you're just guilty.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. And then you have to prove your innocence. That's the difference in what happened then versus what happens now. And now there's going to be a Netflix documentary made about it from one side or the other that thought they were right. And.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Try to sway you the other way, just like making a murderer or all those other ones that were big during the COVID.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I'm a goblin. The only thing I chuck rocks at is a sign. Why is that so funny? If you're going down the road and you just roll a rock out and it hits a sign. I mean, what a great feeling. When you hear


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, the first time I heard Goblin put all those words together, that's funner than chucking rocks at a sign. I was like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's pretty daggum fun there though. I mean like, cause you sit there and you just try to lob a man. Kaboom.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I will have to say, I will have to say until you get a mattress in the mail, you never realize how tedious going to a mattress store actually is to find the one for you where you can sit down and in two minutes answer all the questions, whether it's for you, you and your wife, your wife, your kids, whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Fill out the questionnaire and they send you a mattress that's made for you because that's what they do. Helix Sleep is a premium mattress brand that provides tailored mattresses.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And even lumbar support for a truly elevated sleep experience.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So if you want to know which one it is, take the quiz. You can get it done in two minutes or less. And then you have a mattress that's built just for you and it ships straight to your door.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You can jump on it, you can lay on it, you can do whatever you want on it because it is that, I mean, it's that well made and there's no better way to test out a new mattress than by sleeping on it. So, 100 night trial to try out your new Helix mattress.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There you go. And we're all unique. We all sleep differently. That's why Helix has several different mattresses to choose from. They have models of memory foam layers, models more responsive foam to crater your body, enhanced cooling features, keep you from overheating. And if your spine needs a little extra TLC, they got you. It has a hybrid design combining wrapped steel coils in the base and foam layers at the top.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I don't know what else you could want in a mattress. Johnny D, he's wrapped up in a pillow in a cloud every night.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There you go. I should go back home right now. Moonlight right? Moonlight. There you go. He's chasing the moonlight. Not only is this the best mattress we've ever slept on, but the setup was fast and easy. Helix mattress delivered in a box straight to your door for free. Don't take our word for it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Helix has been awarded the number one mattress pick by Wire Magazine and is recommended by multiple leading chiropractors and doctors as sleep medicine as a go to solution for improving your sleep. Plus they're American made and come with a 10 or 15 year warranty depending on which one you get.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners. Go to helixsleep.com slash duck and use code helixpartner20. This is their best offer yet and it won't last long with helix. Better sleep starts now. Go to helixsleep.com slash duck and use code helixpartner20.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's interesting topics that things like this, like when I saw it sitting over there, I was like, uh, yeah, this could actually be kind of fun. So.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] At the, at the end of the day, judge, jury trials, all the things. What Phillips said is what I hope is actually the case that somewhere since 1995.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Until now, O.J. found Jesus. He found Jesus. He repented. He gave his life over to him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And hopefully he will be in eternity with all of us. I think everybody, I know everybody in this room for sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wants to spend eternity with everybody, no matter what kind of sinner you were.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, he's probably the most important to have on your side in the courtroom. I mean, Si would help, but, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It would be a bummer to get there and then turn around and come back, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In that case too, that's how you change the world. Like that's the, that's the, uh, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What does it say? Better, better one center come to the Lord, the 99 righteous, the 99 and the one, like the rejoicing, the rejoicing that happens over one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, and I think it's kind of a point Phil always makes, like, for Crying Out Loud, we count time by this fella. Like, I mean. The year 2024. For real, if there was a point.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If there was a point where everybody said time starts now, that's a biggie.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nobody said that about nobody else that was walking on this earth.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Boiling them alive. And still are.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, if he's not, what's the worst that happens to us?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I tend to always opt for the path that leaves a winning out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What you eating over there, old man? He's on that trail mix bag. You know where that trail mix came from, don't you?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It even sounds good boys. Not only does it taste good, it sounds good. Oh, I love it. Look, if, if you like to snack on the go or snack at your desk or snack anywhere, really. Um, yeah, nuts.com has got something for you. Look, throwing snacks. So whether you're wanting like butter braided pretzels, the kids can have, um,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Any nuts, obviously popcorn, specialty flowers, they've got it all. Nuts.com is your one stop shop.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Whether you're looking for something sweet, savory, or neat to stock up on everyday cooking essentials, you're bound to find something to try. And at Nuts.com, quality is the top priority. They roast their nuts and pop their corn the same day it ships so that they reach you fresh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And satisfaction is guaranteed. If you just want to order once in a while, you can do that. If you want to opt in to auto ships, cause you're like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, those bourbon pecans are that good. I need them once a month or once a week or whatever. They've got it. You can do it. And if you're already stocked up at home, look, they sell directly to businesses and have a bunch of great gift options. So.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean they send us stuff all the time and we order from there too and you never knew that you were missing chocolate covered gummy bears until you had one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Look, right now Nuts.com is offering new customers a free gift with purchase and free shipping on orders of $29 or more at nuts.com slash. So go check out all the delicious options at nuts.com slash. You'll receive a free gift and free shipping when you spend $29 or more. That's nuts.com slash.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hunter, were you alive during this? No. No way, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And a lot is changed now because every house you've got somewhere got a camera on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's why I'm telling you, man, when you bring the more you add humans to it. Oh yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The greater the potential for error. Yeah. Right. Yeah. I mean, that's just. Oh yeah. Which is why I like that we really land on the moon.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There you go. Really? Yeah. They, they never were here, right? What you got?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I just love the winding road that most of the time it feels like you're going somewhere, but we're really just like the world's longest NASCAR road race course. We always end up back.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So you think, like, you remake pterodactyls, they just gonna stay in Guatemala, they ain't gonna come swoop you up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, so you're like, like Brontosaurus and like the Planator.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Let me just, I just want to pose this before we go any further. As a country who can't even balance a budget, we don't need to be playing with making dinosaurs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How many people in this country run a balanced budget? Not many our debt ceiling wouldn't be through the roof.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Until we can do the math, until we can do the math, let's stay away from the science. That's all I'm going.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yea, you can make that judgement. Let me tell you something. Easily. If you listen to one episode of this long enough to get to the email address.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm not going to, I'm not going to give you, uh, uh, a word definition, but I'm going to just give you striking visuals.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Red. Red net. Okay. Red. Red net. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Our man Noah didn't write this definition anyways.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, the only thing that they have correct about that after being all over this country and world as well is member of laboring class. The only part of that definition that is actually correct.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah. Notice we ain't picking on Beth saying she ain't one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Look, let's just give a back story on Beth. She started in Canada. She went to North Carolina. She ended up in Louisiana. You don't survive those moves without having at least a 10th redneck in you. So yeah, she's in.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Otherwise she'd have been done. She'd have been done, acted like a mallard Drake and headed back home, but she said no, but the fact that she can come and thrive.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, and Southern, that's just the dumbest thing I've ever heard.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm gonna go white. I don't care. I mean, I think-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you might as well charge tickets to the Winchester Mystery House, right? Like, you might as well charge admission, why not? So uhm, the general consensus was...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think the Wachowskis are really smart. I think they're genius level, right? I think they are way smarter than we could possibly imagine. Uhm, I think they love movies.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Welcome back. Oh, okay, welcome to the show folks. You gotta be kind to these people that keep coming 300 and whatever number we are in. And Si has been trying his hardest to tell us his bank story before we got recording and I wouldn't let him. Si, what happened at the bank?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If anything for Sy, that's only a deposit coming through.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I'm out. Look, I went and got my hair cut. You pointed that out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's like, yeah, we played poker last night. I said, Oh Lord. I said, how much a size money did you take?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well that's what he said, he said, but I think he got clipped for a little bit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm not going to say the amount. I don't want anybody to know Si's business, but that's why I said, if you want that kind of money from Si, just go play poker. It was the best. He'll give it to you with a squirrel on his face.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I could, I could find out for all of our, uh, all of our thoughts and laughter what it was that I just had to. What fraud account does that have happen to? Cause I'm just interested. Man. Man.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well that gotta give me a written report. I mean it's like that time up here that our man, that our man Harry got his attack.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, it's funny though, cause like. It's funny, but it's inappropriate. Because y'all have never met Harry.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And if you met him, he is our controller slash accountant. He's like the most meek, mild individual you've ever seen in your life. Proper. Definitely doesn't fit in here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he wears a jacket and collars and like... Tucks his shirt in. Yeah, that's wild. Cares about himself, really.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And uhm. Washes his car. Mhm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, but here's the best part. Look, Cy, you probably don't even know this, but somebody got into his Amazon account. And just bought stuff. And bought stuff. But to have that happen to Harry Proffitt.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It did show up here and it was a weird box. Yeaah. And that's where we should leave it. That's where we should leave it, but good. Oh yeah. We're not going any further into what they were. It's just, and then Harry's just like, I've been hacked and just dropped the thing. And it's like, Oh wow. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that was weird. But, but it's funny.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause Harry is like the most, when you're talking about finances and all the things. He's a genius. He is. And that is, that is his job and what he does. So the fact that that man can get hacked. Anybody can get hacked. It proves to you that anybody.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Why do hackers? Don't they know they could get the same thing if they just went to work?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but that's the hack and that's just taking their phone when it's unlocked. I mean, Willie Robertson is the reason I put a lock on my phone back in the day. He's bad. Like, cause he will get your stuff. And he will text like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Somebody you haven't talked to in a really long time. Yeah. And tell them something really personal about yourself.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But we are talking about the guy whose biggest hobby used to be filling out like the little free mailers and stuff for people's addresses until their mail got shut down. Like, I mean, the boy. A prankster.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, prankster. But that, see hackers are like malicious. Prankster is fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like he's the reason I shut my computer every day when I walk away from my desk. I never know when he's going to show up and I don't know who he'll email or I ain't trying to hide. Now you can go look, I'll go log into my computer right now. Everybody can look at it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you can't leave it unlocked around him because just like Cy had a weird dot com chart, that's probably something that he would do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] On your card, for sure. Something totally strange. Are we sure that Willie isn't the one that did this though?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I had like seven of them. And this all started since Duck Dynasty because he had one number.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For years and then they just started changing phone services every other month. I never...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now you ain't doing that to man, I know you man. I mean, I kinda like-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I didn't even know how I did that. I'm just glad they're opening up more options. Is Canadian an option?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Eh? Ha, canada, canada! Give me a moment.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just wondering, can you leave a message, eh? Like, I don't know, that'd be kind of fun. I don't have many accents, I'm not very good at it, but. Canadian ones are tough. Eh? Bess is pretty good. Well, she's basically an American at this point. She ain't dropped an A since she been here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's unfortunate. Cause that could really be a lot of fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, guilty also to watch the one thing sign up for something. I'll never forget that. Then there it is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean you can subscribe to anything today. You can like subscribe, get fishing baits, you can get TV, music.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 75% of people have subscription they've forgotten about.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're all guilty of it. 100%. Everybody is guilty of it. You think you got like, oh, I probably got five or six and then boom, you get on there and you got 17. You're like, uh oh, problem. Alert. More than one. Alert.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So look, thanks to Rocket Money, you no longer have to worry about wasting money on the ones you forget about. Look, if you're trying to save money, Rocket Money is key at that too. It can track your spending.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All your finances, all the things, they're in one place and Rocket Money will help you cancel anything that you don't want.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] At the end of the busy week, last thing you want to do is spend time budgeting expenses or tracking down customer service teams to cancel old subscriptions. So, just use Rocket Money, click the button, call it good. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending and helps lower your bills so that you can grow your savings.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You can see all your subscriptions in one place, and if you see something you don't want, Rocket Money can help cancel it with just a few taps of the dashboard.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It shows me this month's spending compared to last month. So you can compare. Are you trending up, down, level, whatever. You can track yourself. It's an ultimate accountability app.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Look, Rocket Money will even try to negotiate lowering your bills for you by up to 20%. All you have to do is submit a picture of your bill and Rocket Money takes care of the rest. They'll deal with customer service for you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Rocket Money has over 5 million users and has saved a total of $500 million in cancelled subscriptions saving members up to $740 a year when using all of the app's features. So stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash duck. That's rocketmoney.com slash duck rocketmoney.com slash


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We tried. Oh, she said, alright, time out. She said, oh wait, let me go to the bank website. So we're about to find out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She couldn't answer, but I got Christine via text message. Didn't have to talk to her.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You just got the whoop whoop whoop. My favorite part is him and Phil both say that they hate technology till they need it. And then they keep somebody around them at all times that's got it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I was like, why did a man just walk through these halls wearing a helmet that said monster energy? I'm just like, what?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He was, he had on, no, he didn't have on a full jumpsuit, but he had on sweat breeches.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He did, he wore it and then had a full conversation with Becky. With the helmet on? With the helmet on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh wow, okay. Yeaah, that's pretty easy to know it's not Si. Uhm, I'll tell you in a minute, it's not, it's very unfulfilling. So, uhm, unfortunately. But, uhm, so then he comes and has a conversation with me. Helmet on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then asked me, he says, do you want to see my bike? And I was like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well no, it's one of them little fast ones, but it's little. It's, I didn't know they made them this small. It's $4.50. Yeah, it's just a little tiny thing, like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's the next step up from a moped. No sir. Like in size. Like cause it's just, it's little. And I said. What's on the speedometer? I didn't look. Cause I didn't want to know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nooo. But then I asked him, I said, Dan, I said, do you just feel safer, period, with that helmet on? Like, why ain't you took it off?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is my favorite part. He said, well, I ordered the helmet without having, without checking the sizes and it hurts too bad to take it on and off.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Dan's is so small, he would be like easy to miss on the road. Like it, it's not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He said the worst was his actual father when he told him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I didn't think I'd raise somebody to do something that dumb.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He said, I said, what else did he say? He said, nothing. That's it. That was it. He said, I don't know if he walked away or just got real quiet. He said, but I never heard another thing from dad.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And Dan's dad, by the way, is the one that like started filming The Commander, so like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The OG cameraman editor and everything. So there's a little backstory for y'all listening at the house.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The website. The website. Yeah, very, very unfulfilling. It was, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's mukhost.com, the UK's most reliable cloud web hosting. Again, very unfulfilling. Christine said the bank has already returned the money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And she said, this is definitely not something Sy would get, also nothing I would do using his cart. Well, yeah, I mean, now I see why the guy was like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, so Sy was hosting some website in Europe for somebody, so, you know, who knows what that was. Probably little German pizzas you can roll up like a cigar or something, you know? I don't know. Somebody, somebody.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh no, let's keep, let's keep rolling. Cause I, I need you to, yeah, we'll just keep rolling. We'll let Hunter find a break in this to 40 minutes. But well, I want to know your newest member first of all, that you told us of the jujitsu gym. Oh, Rooker.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, he's about to lose a month to a cracked rib on day one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know what you don't do at the bank? You don't sleep at the bank, but if you took your pillow with you, you could.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey, so I've got a question. Do you have a bank robe?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they just want you guys to know that they appreciate all your great support during these times and want to thank you by giving you the best specials on their MyPillow product.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Amen. And look, if you want to take advantage of this to get the best specials ever, go to MyPillow.com


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Go to mypillow.com slash duck and enter promo code duck or call eight hundred nine six nine three.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm talking about immediately, right now. Yeah, so fast that I can't even finish the phone number.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just want, I want to do what we used to do for Duck Dynasty or Duck Commander, the show and Duck Dynasty. I want to write on the wall, Rucker, Black Belt and Taekwondo. Cause when he comes back, I need to know more about that. Like we can just glance over it now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like when I see his little rolly polly self come up, I don't think Taekwondo is like kicking and stuff, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, yeah, she's a runner. Like, I mean, she runs, but that's about... I don't do that. I haven't ever seen her do anything more athletic than jog.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I agree, but, I mean, good night. Like, mmm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You just think you would see that skill transfer into some other area like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But Rurucker, he just got the gift of gab. Did he talk his way to a taekwondo black belt, like?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh man. Uh, Si, if you were 20 years younger, would you, would you go jiu-jitsu? Oh, no.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My only problem is I know enough of them boys I'm scared they'll somehow drag me out there. Oh no. And then put me unconscious. No, wouldn't nobody do that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ain't nobody in that gym scared of me, nor should they be.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm not saying I'm good at fishing, I just would rather spend my time doing that than somebody choking me out or breaking my arm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was so mad. Where'd you go? I just went to the pond where my boat is. I mean, there's not many fish in it anyway, but there's big ones and I just could not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 33. Yeah. I mean, if you want to push, I would probably go with some kind of spin cast. Just so if you do and decide you like it, you can do more with it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thanks, Hunter. Hey. Are you one of the 17 guys in the comments? How disrespectful, John? Here's the way you catch a fish.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know the difference between a fish and a snake. I went up to a rock pile this morning. I'll get Jared to send the stuff. I went to a rock pile this in this pond I was fishing this morning and I was looking over there. I was like, Oh no, you don't want it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I thought, Jared, I said, do you see all them snakes? And he was like, that ain't a snake. I said, oh yeah. Well, I don't know that they all are, but I can assure you the one on the bottom is cause I've watched him move and he's like, no, no way.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Madison, if you're gonna take that advice, I'm gonna give you one piece of equipment you need. A lifejacket. Yep.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But isn't there a chance, I say I don't use Gamefly, I haven't used it, ever, uhm, don't you not get games, like if something's in high demand, or do you get it no matter what? Eh, you can, there's, there's ways.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We had a flight, we were going to, uh, we went to Euroblaster for Eurogamer, or EGX, whatever they call it, uhm, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, our younger listeners will get to this point one day in their life. But this, this is weird moment where


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean it made sense with cartridges and stuff, like they were harder, you know, it was more expensive. I mean, 32 megabits.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I got pressured into buying Sunset Overdrive, a friend wanted to play online, and he was like, yeah bro, let's play, let's play, let's play, and never played with me. I'll play with you. Okay. That game is really fun. I know, it is fun. That game is awesome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was gonna say, for all the people who are always like, oh dude, game collection is so important to me, game collection is just like, move.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Apparently it only takes a year of nagging. Alright, everyone, welcome to a, uh, You know when you go into, uh, Home Depot. And it smells like dry water. Bye Joel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This, uh, this bowl of dude soup is brought to you by FanDuel. Uh, you can sign up for fantasy leagues. Baseball season is starting, so go to FanDuel.com.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Click on the microphone in the upper right hand corner and use the code DUDE to sign up today. Thank you FanDuel. We'll be hearing more from them later.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And Adam was basically the first person to kind of tell me the stuff that happened in the novel, the stuff that happened in his official screenplay. His fan fiction. Uh, and he actually, he actually put, connected a lot of the dots together and actually kind of showed me the stuff behind Halo that's really cool. Which they do a lot of in Halo 4 and that's why we're gonna bring


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She's supposed to be more matronly, right? Like, to me, I was reading into, like, her character design. Granted, her tits got bigger. And I was like, okay, whatever. No, it's not a bad thing, but it seems, it seems like pandering, but then I was like, actually, they made her hips wider, they just made her, like, more like a mother.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now Master Chief has to shoot the aliens on...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If we're keeping with that. Yeah, you're probably right. Moses is not a warrior. Chief isn't Jesus.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My favorite thing is getting stuff wrong around people that can't bother to hear it wrong.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's a good dance. We did that in a gym class in elementary school.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, it's weird because they always set up Chief as having zero humanity. So really the only point of empathy you have is when he almost starts to show humanity, but then he immediately doesn't. Almost every time. So it's kind of like, it's kind of like Cortana's trying to draw humanity out of him and every time he's like, I have to kill more aliens.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, but they backed her up, so oh, she's on a USB stick.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cortana. Alright. Absolutely. Uh, so Adam, uh, we all primed for a Halo 5 discussion now? Guns, guns, guns. You got everything out of it? There you go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you did. Okay, so predictions. Do you think, uh, Cortana's tits will be even bigger in Halo 5? Yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like another Cortana? A sexier, big tiddier Cortana?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, theoretically, honestly at this point, the story kind of writes itself. If you look at templates basically, there's going to be a point where...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like the, the human, like maybe the human government decides to strike a deal with the Prometheans or whatever. And the Prometheans are like, okay humanity, we'll let you live as long as you submit to us and like adopt our way of life. It's not bullshit like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well doesn't that also kinda strike back to Halo 2 and like the religious fanatic, er, uh, religious associations that, uh, the Covenant have with humanity? Like the Covenant wanted to eradicate humanity but, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, uh, what I heard is, in all that conversation, that there will be a new Cortana and her tits will be here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like it's in vogue now for games to comment on the fact that you always think you're the hero when you're the main player. I think it would be cool for you to play as, you know, air quotes Master Chief, and then like start to do some really fucked up shit, and you're like obeying orders, like maybe you start killing civilians or something like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's all. Yea, Adam's allowed to like Halo. Listen. Listen. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But that's, see, that's a side of Chief that I wish you could either experience through the game or would be explored in the game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was there, well, I appreciate Bungie's approach, even though I didn't give them enough credit. Uh, Bungie, you know, and you can see this with Destiny, their approach is always like, we're gonna give you the game. And if you like the game enough, that you wanna spend more time in that world when you're not playing the game,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like a good movie or something like that because it's people talking and dialogue happening and world building. And then Chief goes back to Earth and then fights more aliens and that's the video game part of it. Can we move on to the pictures? Sure. I'm excited about the pictures. So Adam, we're gonna punch a huge hole in your theory here. Yeah. Uh, Master Chief has little dinghy things on his chest, but in the trailer he doesn't have the dinghy thing. Uh-oh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All of it. Every last bit. So if you're unfamiliar, FanDuel is a fantasy league where you can win actual real money. You have to bet actual real money. Maybe it's not betting, maybe they found a way around that. Anyway, you deposit money, I don't know, I thought it was legal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, uh, you deposit your money, you, you pick your team, it's actually pretty easy, they'll, they'll give you all these metrics to make it really easy to pick if you're maybe a little new to fantasy sports, like they'll give you like points per player, points per game, things like that, so you can just pick by the numbers if you're new, uhm, and it's-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you can pick by the heart if you believe in the soul of the ball, uh, but you just go to Fandool.com, do use our code, dude, click on that microphone, that will qualify you for a bonus of up to $200. That is deposit match, by the way, so you have to put in $200 if you want the bonus $200.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, uh, yeaah, you use your, use your little deposit account there, you, uh, you enter leagues, and, uh, the cost scales up. Ooh, late title card, that's good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Spend 80 hours playing it like I do. If I have a fix on people that like Souls games, and I'm not gonna say FromSoftware because FromSoft has actually made a lot of stuff that's not Souls, but uhm, those people will always find some reason to tell you that you have no justifiable reason to not like the thing that they like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that's after you go through the whole library area, which is really hard unto itself. All the stupid fucking like, staircases that move around? It's bullshit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like Super Meat Boy was maybe one of the first games that actively zeroed in on the instant death, instant reload thing where it's like you're already there again, just go, go, go, go, try it again.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, but, uh, invariably there's always the guy who can't wait to show you just how cool on the internet he can be.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Domtrain, he or she, I'm being egalitarian here, writes MGS Rising had a block but it was impossible to use.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, I don't know where the wheelchair came from. So, uh, I've, uh, I've seen this happen again and again, there are guys who are like, I just wish a girl would play video games with me, and then the second she does, like, he says, okay, let's play Street Fighter, and then wrecks her, and then he never wants to play again. Don't be like that, huh? Maybe be inclusive.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Heath Hoffman writes, and I'm only picking this one because I feel like there's an assumption behind this question that we should address. He writes, I love you guys, but this show is unwatchable. He's referring to the last podcast. Unwatchable?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] After, after interrupting me a million times, Joel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, King Corgi drew me, so of course it's getting in the podcast. Thank you. I think I look pretty cute. I like that. I think you look pretty cute too. Thanks. Luke Garvey on Twitter drew an icon for demo disc in Bruce's, I guess if Bruce had been a boxer for about 20 years.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Vision Driver or Jesse on Twitter drew a funhouse, or made a funhouse coin bank. Nice! With some European currency sticking out of that. Uh, dude soup will only house American currency if you stick European currency into it. It will detonate.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh man. Though, it should be noted that different artists. Yes, yes. James was drawn by, uh, acid rain. That's right, acid rain. So, steamy tomato took over, still good to put it all together. Great, great, uh, good instance of passing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So good. Uh, Reddit user Optimus Prime. Always making some good shit. Made a demo disc.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then did a, just an amazing portrait of drunk souls. We look like ghosts. We do. I love it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would love to have, like I say this maybe every other week, but this in a frame would be amazing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Remember the fart? I don't remember what I was saying. I don't remember what you were saying either. Yeah, because you were thinking about your fart. Yeah, absolutely. I'm usually thinking about my fart.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Please tell me you put yes ma'am in the subject line. No, I just responded.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, she got me. She got you. You got baited. Well, you win, lady. You got baited.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know how Hunter knows that? That's a technique he uses on ladies. You need to get over yourself. I'm so sorry, Hunter. Well hey, what you doing for dinner tomorrow night? It's reversed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nah, nah, we're out, man. I mean, they're, you know, like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm the guy at the club awards that's gonna go back there and ask where the gin and tonic is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't drink, but at an award show, I'd probably have a gin and tonic and they're probably like, sir, we don't serve that here. Oh no, these are non-denominational folks.


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[Assistant] Yeah, see the best gig we got is that Sadie writes a skit that involves Sy. What is it? And he gets to wear a Duck Call Room t-shirt. That's the best chance we've got to be on the Clove Awards. Amen. Right there. Amen. But I don't know if they let like the host write their own skits or not, so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he continues to wear our hats everywhere he goes, which makes me giggle every time. Cause I'm like, when we ordered those hats, man, those are some of the most atrocious hats I've ever seen. And John Chris loves them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which he made a good point though then, I'm not trying to steal it. Do y'all sell the fish hooks that go on hats?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Still, where are we going with this before? I just, I'm just curious. Do y'all have the option to purchase a bent fish hook to put on your hat? Two dollars and they sell loads of them. Hey Bob.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But did you, you did at one point have a fishhook on your hat? I have never done it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Really? Never. Standing strong. Goblin? Oh, he's standing strong. When you worked at that paper mill, did you have a fish hook on your hand? I'm trying to think.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You did. I don't know. You for sure did. Absolutely.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, hat accessories, hat accessories are interesting to me. Is that what you, where, yeah, where were you going with that? I was just curious. Well, cause he made that, you know, Chris made that deal. It's a bunch of stuff on Instagram. And here's where I was going with that. So I went and sat down and chatted with John Godwin the other day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] At our other warehouse where the duck calls are built and we're just sitting there talking and I happen to look over and there's a hat where stone used to sit. I'm not sure if stone still.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sits there. And it has a fish hook on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I took a picture and texted to Mr. Christ and said, don't mess with our people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, he was just like, I don't understand it. And I agree, I don't necessarily understand hat accessories. I also don't understand croc accessories. Like, why do you fill up them little holes on crocs?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. I can get behind that. Really? I mean, that's cool. You mean you're going to be on your horse with a croc song?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But they know exactly where that invisible fence is. And I'm waiting for the day they don't, and then I'm dinner. So they can come through. I turn around. They can, but they just know better.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think they realize it ain't worth it. They've never passed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All of them. What's your peak? Oh he watched his neighbor punch that bull that time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I can look around my house and tell you places I wasted 20 grand that didn't make nearest


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is that a money tree? What's a money tree?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because you know what they say, good fences make good neighbors, but if you don't want to spend the money on lumber and you want to use wood still for your fence, boom, buy you some trees, make you a nature fence, a natural fence. Dear Morgan and Austin, trees are going up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, I planted in persimmon trees last year, they're already sprouting, they're coming back. Look, Fast-Grown Trees is the biggest online nursery in the U.S. with more than 10,000 different kinds of plants and over 2 million happy customers in the U.S. I know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They have them grouped by zone. So you can just like click on Louisiana and then here comes a whole new list of plants that'll grow here in Louisiana. So no matter where you're at, they can help you saving time and money. I got limes. I got satsumas. We got everything there. And no matter what you, what you have.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You can get whatever you want. They got lemons, avocados, olives, figs, every kind of citrus tree you can think of. Aside from that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They absolutely do. You put in, you put in where you're from and it gives you a list of acceptable plants, uh, for your area.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And can help you just dial writing. It is that simple. And look, it's easy to order online. Your plants are shipped directly to your dorm one to two days.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they have a 30 day alive and thrive guarantee and they even offer you free plant consultation forever. So if you ain't got a green thumb, don't worry about the folks over at fast growing trees can help.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How to take care of your plants and everything else you need. No green thumb is required. They'll help you, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? Um, cultivate a green thumb. Cultivate. Right now they have the best deals online up to half off on select plants and listeners to our show get an additional 15% off when using the code duck at checkout.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's an additional 15% off at fastgrowingtrees.com using the code


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Check out FastGrowingTree.com, code duck. Offers valid for a limited time. Tell them we sent you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I will lose there. No, no, no. Johnny, Steve's too tight with you. He had to recuse himself from the case. Y'all buddies. I'm pretty sure that would win.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Johnny D is way more interested in a service that he texts the night of and says, I need gas before in the morning, they come pick his truck up, gets the gas, it's called an Uber gas. No, no, no. What would be even better?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You ain't got strips on your windshield. Galvin, I know you on a diet.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I've also traveled enough with you to know. Man likes snacks.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How are we not gonna, I mean, we got gas station fried chicken now. Well you go, go in the store and get it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know if you noticed about Johnny D, but he's not a fixer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, so if the pillow wasn't enough and you needed to be extra cozy when you go to sleep, he got you. You can wrap yourself up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And some cotton from Giza. And you can dream all night long. Your friends will be calling you Cozy McCoserson. I guarantee you. They are the best sheets you will ever sleep on. The best night's sleep just got even better. For a limited time, you'll get a queen size set for $59.98.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] King size for just $69.98. The lowest prices in history. Mike and the MyPillow employees continue to be canceled by big box stores and attacked by the media, but not on this podcast, dead government. They appreciate all of your great support during these times. I want to thank you by giving you the best specials on the MyPillow products. So whether you're wearing the robes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Whether you're like Queen Brittany walking around in her mice slippers all the time, every day, all day. That's what she does.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You will also get 60% off the original My Slippers. Go to mypillow.com slash duck in order today and enter promo code duck.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But no, that's not what I meant. My problem is, is if I do that, I should receive a 10% discount.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, absolutely. Montreal, the only problem with Montreal, if the post office knew, he'd pull up a chair when he got in here. Probably, he can't stop.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now, I mean, to me, what, what we're saying when you say that would be, if I had Godwin packaging duck call parts, just the parts.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they paid full price. And I sent them the duct call and they have to put it together themselves.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Are you on the list for a Tesla truck? No. I don't know, I mean that's just kind of the vibe I'm getting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So would you let somebody, you own a small business, would you let somebody check themselves out at the honey home? Heck no.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm just saying, that's what I want to see in Honeyhill. If it's good enough for Walmart, it's good enough for Honeyhill.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do they sell honey? I hope so. Honey makers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hard to say. Well that's interesting. Yeaah. Let's take a break. We'll be back right after this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I had to go, cause we're filming some cooking stuff here. No, but I did see our friend Hunter in the parking lot. What was he doing in the parking lot? Hunter, that's shady. What were you doing, pal?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I wasn't the target market, but I thought the commercial was clever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, every time I get a rental, I book an SUV and it's like the Seinfeld deal, like I reserve an SUV, so we're all out of SUVs. Okay, cool. And what's the reservation for? You know, all that deal. And end up in a car.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That I can't get into. I have to just kind of do a controlled fall. I mean, you let gravity take over and catch yourself and hope you don't get hurt.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean me and Godwin have made some of them things on speaking events like, like beg for mercy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cars are weird. I mean, you get it. You put me and Gavin, especially at the height of us, and by the height I mean the width.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, where do we go from here? I don't even know. Oh, the owner. You know how to make a duck blind?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Christmas story. Put your eye out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's still trying to figure out how they could change. It would be a good thing if they brought it back.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Have you been, when was the last time you've been to a hat? I might get an extra tube of toothpaste or something. Brittany really into Mexican food. I always make her eat it with friends. 1995? Yea, I mean I just don't, I don't care. The one right here? Yea, the hat.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I understand that. Now when you walk into the hat.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You go sit down, a little robot brings you your chips and salsa. Really? I ain't been there in a while.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because cats don't fetch things, like, you know, if it were a dog, it'd be caught on. Well, it's not, it's not fetching, it's bringing. Well, either way. Hold on! And it plays a little ditty as it's coming to you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well you then have a server, just your initial set while he's getting your drinks and stuff is brought by the robot. Is it like a Roomba?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It, it looks like a three story Roomba if you had to like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, it's got like shelves, it's got your chips, salsa, and bowls all on the shelves.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it brings to you, comes to your table in like parallel parks where you can grab the stuff and put it on your table.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I look for that and best I can tell is they've got the whole restaurant mapped and somebody over there types in the table number. Because as it's coming to you, it's got like a number on the back of it like a jersey and that number changes every time. So I think it's just mapped out the whole restaurant and chairs and stuff and I think we need to move, go in there and move the tables.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, you could throw a chair out in front of it and probably really derail the whole process.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The only thing to change now is it's super more expensive, but most of the people are still working there and...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Latin food? That place ain't big enough for a robot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The best part about- Over here? Yea. There's two of them now. There's two of them. They got divorced. I thought it was a brand-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're back. Hello at DuckCallRoom.com, Johnny D.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I'm pretty well aware of what our demographic is. I could have went, yeah, that's a great idea. Well, the SEC won't let me be.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] From the way you describe it, you're the one that needs to repent for what happened at the drive in, not me. No, I told you it was good, clean, fun. It didn't sound clean if you chased it from the front seat to the back seat to the front seat to the back seat and you didn't even see the window.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We ain't real far from like treading down Howard Stern territory.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just run hot. Oh, I'm just fancy. Like, I'm not even fancy. Like, you know, we can share a bathroom. That's cool.


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[Assistant] Yeah, glamping, be tight. Like, get one in fancy tree houses that also has a mini-split. Like, there's nothing wrong with central heat now.


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[Assistant] Yeah, and I bet like when the ones that we have today started and they were like, thank God, I'm tired of sweating at the drive-in. Like there's a reason they took over.


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[Assistant] We don't have a script. No bookies.


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[Assistant] Did you ever have a pager? Huh? Si, did you ever have a beeper?


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[Assistant] Now I'm actually like legitimately curious on what the collars look like on the chickens.


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[Assistant] You have a leash here, kid? Didn't work.


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[Assistant] The problem if you put leashes on my boys right now, they always walk in opposite directions, so they just pull you in half.


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[Assistant] Interesting. Well, let's follow these kids all the way to the Bible.


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[Assistant] It don't work. You're sitting too close to Si. Yeah.


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[Assistant] You know all math jokes ain't terrible, only some.


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[Assistant] Well finally. Yeah, he found it. Yeah, I finally got it.


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[Assistant] In the summertime you had these things you'd buy and it spiraled around. You'd light the end of it and it'd keep skaters out of your car.


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[Assistant] Cause you head roll, you bend her down to put the speaker on.


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[Assistant] I already drove your truck up there and backed in so you could sit in the bed and watch it. You didn't go there to watch the movie, son. I have a blanket.


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[Assistant] Oh yeaah. That don't sound like datin' to me. It used to be over.


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[Assistant] Well, we'd watch the movie. We'd watch the beginning of it.


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[Assistant] Sometimes you seen it, sometimes you didn't. Sometimes you just load up as many people because it was the same price per car.


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[Assistant] So you'd load up as many people as you could get in there.


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[Assistant] Long chairs beside it, I mean, we'd have a picnic.


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[Assistant] This is a terrible business model. No, they don't go to concessions.


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[Assistant] That's 2024. Hey, you could just use the guards for parking lot, parking spaces, let people come.


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[Assistant] We was thinking, boy, I thought I had that stuff up high enough. No. Nope.


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[Assistant] The, the refrigerator's right here. We got-


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[Assistant] She pulls the drawers out, used them for a lighter, got on top of the cabinet, and sitting on top of the refrigerator, and I come in there to get coffee. Yep. How old was she? I don't know, little. Little? Yeah, before she get... Before she started school, I mean way little. Too little to be on top of your old friend.


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[Assistant] That's me and I don't know if, uh, he gets it from wearing a hat in any building or just


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[Assistant] Does he lay the contribution song? Contribution song?


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[Assistant] Easy. Silence. JB. Did you name your kids?


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[Assistant] I'm from a boy named Tiger, Tiger Turner. C? VT. Yep. He's pretty good.


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[Assistant] He was a fisherman. Yeah, there you go. I wouldn't name him Peter.


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[Assistant] I most women would kill for lose a hundred pounds.


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[Assistant] Kaye Robertson has spent her lifetime trying to fat me up.


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[Assistant] That ain't happenin'. That ain't happenin'. I'm serious. She have. You're old age.


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[Assistant] No, no, my wife said, she said, what are you doing? I said, hey, this is new.


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[Assistant] Oh no, no, no, that's like right now. It's ice cream bars and.


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[Assistant] I don't want to listen to anybody.


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[Assistant] That's why I'm so healthy. I eat a, I eat a belly. What?


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[Assistant] I'm like, I'm like, I'm like what? Joe Diffie. Hey, when I die, prop me up beside the U-box boy and let the party continue.


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[Assistant] No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.


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[Assistant] Hey, what's the sandwich? All right, now we all make full sandwich. Is the hot dog a sandwich?


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[Assistant] He come around, no, no, it was nighttime, he come around a curve, okay, and there's a big cow standing in the middle of the road.


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[Assistant] The cow actually rolled over the VW and crushed the top of the car. Oh.


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[Assistant] No, no, look, and the cow actually, when the car hit him.


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[Assistant] He rolled and knocked him off his feet. He rolled on top of the car, all four legs, take it up. And then he fell off the back.


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[Assistant] Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.


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[Assistant] Okay, and I guess you say alcohol was involved in this accident. But anyway, and nobody will ever know there's like a raccoon or deer or something dead on the road and buzzards are picking on it. Well, he didn't slow down. So guess what happened when he come by? Yeah.


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[Assistant] And then he's fighting, he's fighting the buzzers trying to, you know, not wreck.


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[Assistant] Well, stone was, stone was about 230. Stone hit 230.


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[Assistant] Ask me where I'm going, sir. Don't ask me where I've been. He's like Johnny Winx. If you ask Johnny Winx during duck season, hey, how many did y'all kill today? He said, hey, we all sh-


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[Assistant] Well look, they whore me out. That's the reason I had to take a nap every day.


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[Assistant] Now, cause you figured, okay, you know, whole year.


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[Assistant] Well, if you do that for a year, you run every day five miles. You should get up and just run five miles down and be breathing hard.


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[Assistant] I don't even run to the store or something. Hey, look, I always tell people, you see me running?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, so look, hey, if you're smoking, you better throw them things away or you're going to be just like I am. You can't take 10 steps. Now you whore out. You figure you've been working for two years.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yea it is. And crappie and french fries. Oh don't try, don't try to tell me it ain't, cause I, I've been eating dresser ever since ducks eating started. Okay, and I've been. Martin would give me two woodies, I'd pick them and claim them and put them in. I'm gonna take


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[Assistant] Oh, ice cold milk with a gooey chick cookies, yeah.


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[Assistant] The only thing I would put in if I had a bunch of hearts and gizzards, I would chop them up real thin and put it in a dress.


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[Assistant] And it's like everything. You know, people have a certain thing that they cook and it's spectacular when they cook it.


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[Assistant] But y'all said one thing, I could eat dressing every day. Really? I'm serious. It's like hamburger.


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[Assistant] You could cook me a good homemade hamburger. I'll eat it every day and never get tired of every day dress in the same way. That's crazy.


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[Assistant] Because I made three different casserole.


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[Assistant] So yeaah. So you couldn't do what they. That's how it slides like that can. About shoot a buffalo. Now. And then eat the liver? No.


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[Assistant] Because hey, his woman took him out to Captain Daze because he was feeling bad.


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[Assistant] If a frog could stand up, it'd look just like me. There's a lot of truth in that.


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[Assistant] Martin? I had tuckered legs, well hey, that big around, I'm telling you. I don't


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[Assistant] And it actually spells his name, R-O-B-I-N-S-O-N. Robinson. Robinson.


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[Assistant] That didn't get any longer than that? No, no, it was longer than this. I actually, when I retired out of the military, I threw my razors away. No haircut, no beer shake. Till what? When we went to Lubbock, Texas for a dove hunt.


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[Assistant] I ain't done that. I ain't done that in about three weeks. At the same time. I need to shave mine.


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[Assistant] Ducks. Lead with that man. There's no instrument of any kind.


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[Assistant] Dude, he is such an awesome athlete. We have so enjoyed. So we put him in basketball his first year.


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[Assistant] We have, we've took him, we've been watching Christian play that Wassman-Carroll game. If people don't know, it's the best two high school teams, I think here in North Louisiana.


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[Assistant] It was the most awesome game at ULM, went to overtime, Christian scored 35 points. It was incredible. They won too. It was awesome. It was fun. Wow. He's in the playoffs now. So Gus loved that. I mean, he was like, oh my God, dad, he dunked Christian dunked. I'm like, yeah, he dunked.


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[Assistant] River's playing golf. Um, he had his first tournament yesterday. He played like really well, super, was it yesterday or day before yesterday?


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[Assistant] Tuesday, or yeaah, well I guess time doesn't matter on podcasts, sorry. No. Uhm, anyway.


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[Assistant] He hit the ball really well, it was super windy that day, and uh,


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[Assistant] And he, but he still played good. He had some good shots. And then on a part of his first par five, he got up there and he chili dipped it. And I was like, you can't say anything. You're like as a parent, you just watch and can't say anything.


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[Assistant] He's kind of shook his head. He got up there. Well, did it again. I was like, oh my gosh, here we go. It took him four tries, but he did get it on the green. But, uh, and you can only double your, what par is. So he took a 10, but oh my gosh, I thought, oh, that's it. He's like, he's not going to play good the rest of the time, but he actually.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pick, picked himself up and played good the rest of the time. So it's, I enjoy watching him. I wish I would have done that when I was in junior high.


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[Assistant] It happened. I mean, you're gonna do it. To do it several times in a row, that's when it's like, oh, please, you know.


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[Assistant] She's actually a super sweet dog. I had a Great Dane when I was younger.


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[Assistant] And she reminds me a lot of her, she's very skittish. She, you would think, oh my gosh, the dogs gonna kill me. And then you just go toward her and she's like, oh wow. She's real sweet.


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[Assistant] No, but Jessica is, so she has taught me how to.


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[Assistant] Is he like a raccoon? Looks like a lynx, I would say.


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[Assistant] I do not like goat products. He doesn't like it. He's not a fan. Really? Not a fan. I had some and I went to Ethiopia and I was like, everybody else was eating.


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[Assistant] And I would have this year, but I'll tell y'all something.


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[Assistant] That you should never do. And I just started doing it. Uh oh.


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[Assistant] So I've recently made a new friend and I talk about him all the time and just like, oh my gosh, you're so obsessed with this guy, but he is really cool. He was a Navy SEAL.


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[Assistant] Which in my eyes, that's like my heroes. It's like those dudes. Cause I'm like, I could never do that. They are our elite warriors. Yep. And he's recently removed. He's only been out like a year and a half, I think. And, um, I was, I go to church with him and we were just talking. I said, man, I just need to get in shape. And I just mentioned that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so we went to a Bible study just this past week and uh, he said, all right, you ready? And I was like, ready for what? He was like, you want to get in shape? And I was like, why did I ever say that in front of this guy?


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[Assistant] Yeah. And then when he says, dude, I'm gonna say, oh my gosh, like, then you can't let him down. That's right. Yeah. You know, this guy gave me a headlock.


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[Assistant] Yep. Yeah. This guy the same way. His name is Dan. I call him Danimal.


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[Assistant] No, different. Now this guy is big. He looks like he, he's tall. He's all tatted up. He looks mean. The nicest guy you ever met. He's actually in seminary, online seminary. So yeah, he loves the Lord. So he's a cool dude. So what's he got?


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[Assistant] It's like, uhm, it is crossfit type stuff. Yeaah. Yeaah.


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[Assistant] Oh my gosh, every, everything is sore. I can't help you there buddy. Yeah, that's a bad deal. He was like, oh, we're doing these weight stuff. He's obviously doing much more and with like a barbell, I'm doing like dumbbell stuff. I'm doing the same things just at a very basic step. Yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Our next thing we're going to do. Oh, we're not done. We're going to get on this assault bike, which, you know, you seen that bike where they, you do, you know, you see them on the NFL sidelines where they're just kind of warming up. Well, also with that bike, you can go super hard and it'd be the most hard thing you've ever done. Like your legs just burn like crazy doing that mixed with like jumping squats.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So hard, but, but I feel good. I mean, I've, I hadn't worked this hard out this hard in a long time. So I think he's driving Jessica crazy. Cause when I get home, I'm just like, Oh, cause we've been doing kind of early in the mornings.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well then I asked him, I said, damn, what do you eat? He said, uh, eggs and oatmeal. I was like, yeah, but I mean, what else? He was like, no, that's, that's what I eat. But for a snack now, he does eat raw chicken livers. And I thought for a snack, you eat raw chicken livers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, this is actually kinda healthier. Oh, this is healthy too. I mean, not, I don't know. I love it. What's it called, Jess?


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[Assistant] It's like a rice, um, thing on the outside. Have you ever had mochi?


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[Assistant] I think that uhm, was, didn't we have


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[Assistant] Yeah, I think I had my son-in-law and my future son-in-law in town and, you know, they don't, they're 20 years, you know. To be fair, you're a great show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So we go out at night sometimes and, you know, I will not do it that late at night anymore. No, feel free to. I thought it was hungry. But we play horse basically with disc golf. That's what we're doing. It's like trick shot putting, you know, we're staying within, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nope, that was not me. And actually my yard, we moved a lot of the dirt around, so I've looked around out there a little bit, but it's, there's not really anything in there. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You just take a, I mean there's places around town you can go, I think you can go to like Crowley Park, uh, and like Murray finds stuff there from the 1800s, like coins and stuff, like in, in the woods at Crowley.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What, what it does is like getting in the treasure hunt and stuff, it'll get you researching and like,


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[Assistant] There was a time back in the early 1900s when everything flooded and the highest point in West Monroe, I learned, was Karolyi Park.


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[Assistant] And so a lot of people moved, they like camped there back in like 19, I forgot what it was, 1908 or something like that. And so you can find like some really cool, cause they lived there for like two months or something like that. So the water receded, but yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's a guy here in town that he posts a lot of stuff on, uh, like my brother-in-law sends me stuff, um, about just the history of Monroe, West Monroe. It's really cool. Like I've learned a lot just following that guy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wanted to put, I wanted to put fish in there, cause I thought how cool would it be to have like, big ass in there, whatever, but you can't, everybody can.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Even if it didn't have any fish in it at all. There's a lot of disc golf discs in that pond. I can attest to that. You wanna go get them?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's good at all things, to be honest with you, and, and I will say this, cause I get like, bent, like, the rest of my kids, much like Ben, you know, they, they, they didn't get a lot of playin' time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To make you feel better, this year when we played football, we played against a team that had about five Gus's. Oh, and we got whipped.


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[Assistant] In all areas of the field, he couldn't go anywhere. They just blocked. You're not supposed to block, but they were blocking him.


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[Assistant] Are you having that? I'm just saying they combined ping pong and tennis. And the medium tennis. And the like, big ping pong. You don't have to run as far.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, actually you'd need to be working out. Your bones, yep, you gotta strengthen them bones. I'm telling you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, when you get older it's to strengthen your bones is what I was told by a medical professional.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Jess is a baby whisperer. She's really good with babies.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Of purchase songs. Of purchase songs. Which I'm sure all the artists are forever grateful because they got a cut of their 99 cents.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Phillip's the kind of guy that wears a flower shirt with his hamburger meat hanging out. That's what I just discovered. I mean, I've never seen that from him, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] His playlist is long enough to take you to Oklahoma and back.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or you just need to be on an island for about seven days and nothing to do. You're gonna listen to Phil's music. Well, out of Kenny Chesney. Cause what's wild is you'll listen to that and then all of a sudden here comes Tupac.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If it's anything from 2004 till now, it ain't all night.


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[Assistant] Well, I can honestly say we've been reading Rocket Money ads a long time and I never had on the horizon, John David Cancel's oatmeal subscription. Yup, I did it. Hey, you saving money. But you know, that's more so this podcast in a nutshell.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No. Most people have subscriptions that they don't know about.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, subscriptions you forget about, you wanted to watch the one show, you wanted to watch the one game, you wanted to watch the one this, whatever it is, and then you forget about it. Cause life gets busy and it don't hit you for 30 more days.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Bob, that's where our friends Rocket Money come into play. They let you know, hey, this is coming out and you still want to do this. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscription, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You can see all your subscriptions in one place and if we see something we don't, we won't cancel it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] $720 a year with over $500 million in cancelled subscription. $720 is awesome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's big time. I mean, that's a house note for a lot of people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A couple of car notes for people. So if they're saving you that much money, that's, that's a big deal. You can do it too. Stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel all more than one of the subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash. Duck. That's rocketmoney.com slash. Duck. One more time. Rocketmoney.com slash. Duck.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yep, that's when I peer up and I start feeling there may be an issue.


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[Assistant] I'm like, oh, how about I save this one. Oh boy! Hey. Alright, but we're back.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I remember texting you. He said, I'm across the street watching the game. I was like, I'm in bed, bro. I ain't doing that. That was a weird group. Was it me? You? It's us three.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] John Luke. John Luke. John Godwin. Godwin. And Willie.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What a good time. What a neglect. Yeah. Oh, that's what it was. Cause they have Willie and Sadie and John Luke book. And me and Godwin got booked for like Sadie or Saiga. We were a swap out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I had to stop because we flew around wildfires or something for fuel twice or something weird.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's true too. Yeah, Denver. Yeah. Yeah. We stopped Denver both times, going there and coming back. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean it's nice pulling out to the tarmac, getting your truck washed and everything, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I, I mean, I hate you're not here, but I do like the fact that you're a tackle shop. Cause me and John David just like, we made a trade. We completed like the best redneck trade ever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, Johnny D needed some fishing baits that are like the hottest fishing bait in the country right now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The, the crushed city freeloader. And it just so happens that I work with the fine folks over at Rapalos. I had a stash of them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I brought him, I now have a stash of, I brought him about approximately 30 packages of freeloaders, $6.49. And I'm getting a pair of sunglasses.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I need to be blocked from the sun and he needed freeloaders. That must be some good sunglasses.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I mean, I don't really care. I told him to pick. I said, whatever. I told him, I said, dealer's choice, whatever's a fair trade.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's how you know a man going blind when he says chartreuse sunglasses make everything clear. We got a problem. Cause they were chartreuse. They made everything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nope. Nope. I don't know if the pigeon would fly at like 10 a.m., probably safe.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But there's gonna be some people in our comment section big mad at that. No, no, hey. Well, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's bad enough y'all shoot them, then you go pluck their feathers out. We didn't do it. That's what I'm talking about.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was wow, cause every bitch and I've shot have been pretty easy to hit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They got them out west too. You can go, you can go whack pigeons. Oh yeaah. They call it a Pidge NATO.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, they still typing mad about Si plucking feathers from a pigeon.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What in the world? Did you pull feathers out of pens? No, we shot them and then we scoop them up in a dip net and then send them down there and catch a snapper.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think he's talking about like a raft dry foot defectors from Cuba coming across the


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean I'll eat whatever he's got. Sometimes I really wonder how you fit in in there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh no, I've done this before, but hey, there's a restaurant in Germany. Phillip, you know, Phillip, so fired up. He go get home. Alicia got him some dinosaur chicken nuggets made. It's a big Tuesday.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm going to put way more than two toppings on it. Yeah. I like my pizza to barely the crust to barely be able to hold what I've got on it. Well, like it's a limber underneath.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey, when we start reading ads for Ozempic, you can just say thank you. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. So it's not an optical illusion. No, it kinda is, cause it's a weird, where is that? But Willie's like 5'10", and you're what, 6'4"? Yeaah, but see big dog. That's half a foot. Like, I mean.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm not as tall as I once was. And I don't know, I mean, I don't, but I don't, you know, I don't spend a lot of time around him now, so I don't know. It happens. Nobody does.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I haven't seen him in a few years. Yeah, we had a Facebook Live deal to do yesterday where we were cooking. You made him?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How's he doing? Huh? You met him again? Oh really? Yeaah. He showed up like one minute after we were supposed to start with an apron on that he put on from the golf course.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then, then we started the live and he said, I've been cooking and prepping all day. And of course it's live, so I can't say nothing, but I'm like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Big dog. I've been cooking for five hours.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I do love my job. And I love him as a person. It just is so funny. He's like, yeah, well, three minutes ago I was putting for a lot of money. Did you make it? No.


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[Assistant] I've gotten lots of questions now about what he keeps under his bathroom counter. This is getting better.


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[Assistant] Yeah. Is there a big difference between Vicks Vaporub and Icy Hot? Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Have you tried Icy? No, I ain't going to focus.


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[Assistant] I'm just, I'm still, okay, so you grabbed the wrong container. That's weird enough.


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[Assistant] I can get over the missed product, I can't get over the missed shot. Like, I just got a problem. That's a layup, a dunk.


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[Assistant] Oh, yeaah. We love you man. We'll see y'all next time right here on the Duck Call Room. Don't miss!


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[Assistant] That may be the problem with that. That may be an issue. I heard, talking about ducks. We was sitting on a deer stand yesterday. I'm in the mountains of Arkansas. Okay. And there's a creek running right behind us. Ooh, that's a good duck. That's a good deer heart.


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[Assistant] Wood ducks and that thing. Just playing and getting on the bank. Were they having a good time? Yeah. Okay. I was thinking, well that's the last thing I thought I'd see up here in the mountain.


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[Assistant] She said, she wants to shoot a buck with her bow. And, uh, she said, oh, I pile them, you can shoot a doe anytime.


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[Assistant] And put it on her bow. And I went, okay, okay.


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[Assistant] And she let it back down. What did that back down? The deer walked off, she said.


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[Assistant] Well, me and BK. She said I got bigger horns than that on the wall. Me and BK didn't do that. Oh yea, you went hunting. Yea, well he went hunting too. He went whacking.


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[Assistant] That's your word of where she's supposed to shoot him. Yeah. Well, that's what I say. She looked at me. She said, I don't know.


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[Assistant] She said, I might have messed up there. I said, well, gun season's coming up. Yeah.


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[Assistant] That's what they call these things. I give up. A pot?


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[Assistant] Yeah, coffee pot? Nah, they call them something, a craft, or what do they call that?


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[Assistant] This is the cheap version. This is the cheap version boys.


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[Assistant] I got one of them at the house, I profit up for all of them.


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[Assistant] Half and high sounds better than half and half what?


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[Assistant] Half and half milk or whatever that may, it's half and half. Oh, half and half. It ain't real milk. You don't cook much.


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[Assistant] All in or be it lukewarm, don't worry boys. Half and half you can do them designs on top, but other than that. Designs on top of coffee?


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[Assistant] But she's using that, I don't know what kind it is. I'd know it if I'd seen the bottle.


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[Assistant] But it don't froth up as good as half, half and half. It gets thick, you know. Oh, okay.


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[Assistant] My woman though, she calls it, uh, uh, cappuccino? No. Latte.


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[Assistant] And I don't want that. Yeah, that's my other thing, be efficient, Paul.


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[Assistant] That's why Paula, look, she got her hand when we went to the camp.


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[Assistant] This weekend, and she worked up at Ham.


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[Assistant] And she was gone, put some beans in there and make some, you know. Yeah. But I ate them sandwiches and ate all the ham. She said the ham didn't like. I can't, how do you eat them every day?


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[Assistant] I got in the, like on, in, in the. At the pizza buffet? Yeaah. On top of salad, you betcha, it's going on there.


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[Assistant] I probably could. He probably could. I love horseradish. It's always in the door of my refrigerator.


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[Assistant] James does too. I'm good now. It's been a month.


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[Assistant] That's why I said good shootin'. If you get in a bind, you'll do anythin'.


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[Assistant] Oh, you, you'd have to look. You'd have to fire him on at a taxidermy.


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[Assistant] First off, before you kick it off, let's say welcome. Welcome back. We won't scare a hunter this time.


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[Assistant] Martin has an important question. How did he find you?


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[Assistant] Well in a more important update, not more important than that because that wasn't really an update, that's just what happened, but I'm looking for an update.


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[Assistant] When we left, you had challenged Johnny D to a domino match for quite a sum of money, however much you had in your pocket.


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[Assistant] I watched, I watched them play many years down there at field. We'd eat dinner and they would adjourn to the round table. I think you. And it had the paint just chipped off everywhere.


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[Assistant] Oh, they're gonna call each other an idiot, but we're gonna get beat by 400.


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[Assistant] Well, then that would be a forfeit. I don't know if we still win in that case. That ain't a forfeit. Them boys were pouring into a domino game. It was going on.


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[Assistant] Well, it's easy to like tell the person who's behind you, like what they've got, if they know what they're playing. Like I can reasonably tell the person who's going to play behind me what they have.


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[Assistant] Jayce can look over their two spots removed and tell you what you got too. It's like.


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[Assistant] Yeah. Then once you play that one, then he knows what you got.


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[Assistant] The funniest match would actually probably be like, Sy and Goblin and you and Jayce.


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[Assistant] Yeaah. No thank you. You're gonna get called an idiot. Why'd you play that part? At least a hundred and fifty times. But your saving grace is that Jace's eye may end up in a fist fight and you'll be forgotten about.


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[Assistant] I played with Jace one time and he tried to teach me 40 years of dominoes in 20 minutes. It didn't go well. It didn't go well. I was just like, I play still by size philosophy, kill all doubles, take all points. I still haven't.


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[Assistant] Pace it together. Yeaah, pace it together and you could ride it. I'd strip mine, I'd get one, I'd strip.


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[Assistant] That sounds like my white noise machine that I play as I lay down on my helix mattress.


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[Assistant] And mine was made for me. Yeah, you probably won't love mine because mine is super firm and I know you like to just go lay around in a mud puddle or something.


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[Assistant] Yeah, no matter what kind of sleeper you are, they have 20 unique mattresses, including an award winning Luxe collection, a mattress for.


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[Assistant] Big and tall sleepers, Godwin, you don't qualify for those anymore. And even a mattress made just for kids.


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[Assistant] There you go. Helix are bringing their most premium mattresses yet with the new Helix Elite Collection. Every Helix Elite has a built-in cooling cover, thousands of supportive coils, dual cushioning layers.


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[Assistant] And lumbar support for a truly elevated sleep experience. And you're like, man, that sounds like a bunch. How do I know which one's for me? Boom. Take a quiz. Two minutes. Under two minutes.


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[Assistant] Unless you lie, which will be dumb because you're ordering your mattress.


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[Assistant] And then look, once you do it, mattress ships straight to your door free of charge and there's no better way to test out a new mattress than by sleeping on it. So they offer you a 100 night trial to try out your new Helix mattress. Everybody is unique and everybody sleeps differently. That's why they, that's why Helix has so many models to choose from. Each designed for specific positions and field preferences.


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[Assistant] Memory foam layers, models with more responsive foam to cradle your body. Enhanced cooling features to keep you from overheating at night and if your spine needs some TLC, dead gum it, they got you. Johnny D, how's that moonlight luxe treating you?


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[Assistant] But you ain't gotta take our word for it. Look, Helix has been awarded the number one mattress picked by Wired magazine. It's even recommended by multiple leading chiropractors and doctors of sleep medicine as a go-to solution for improving your sleep.


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[Assistant] Plus, Helix matches are American made, come with a 10 or 15 year warranty, depending on which one you get. And here's the best part.