[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Plus it comes with a 20-day money-back guarantee. So start your new language learning journey today with Babbel. And right now, get up to 55% off your subscription when you go to babbel.com slash Neebs. That's B-A-B-B-E-L dot com slash Neebs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So you've watched the trailer for it, so when's it supposed to be out?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So is that, that's something that you could show us on a stream?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This isn't the one, is there a space one that you're all tethered to? That was Void Train. That's Void Train. I didn't play it. You guys, you guys did a video. Yeah, we checked that out. That was pretty cool. Okay, that's different. And that was like the, that was the demo? Yeah, that was the demo. Gotcha.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe. Maybe just tougher frickin zombies or more of them. Like demon is just, it's, to me it's a bit much, but. Yea.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've deposited stuff by accident a couple times. Where's my shit? What happened?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's fine. I think only a couple, believe it or not, yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I mean, when I did it, most of the stuff disappears and it's pretty obvious, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I'm talking about- You're in the fridge with the meat. Well, dammit. Hey, I, listen, I, I should not get blamed for that all the time and I want to tell you that often times it isn't me. Probably 85% of the time. Other people fuck ups.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, no, well that was just me trying to remember which often happens the week prior. What happened? Oh, Apsro killed me. No, no, I'm sorry. I'm talking about the week after I'm trying to remember the prior week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, oh yes, absolutely, it is, cause I always just go like, yeah, especially if I'm done with like, ugh.


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[Assistant] It's better than not rolling. Yeah, no, I get that. And I haven't, I haven't. That just happened on Bigfoot.


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[Assistant] Yeah, but it does mix things up a little bit, but I hear what you're saying. It's gonna be a little different, we'll figure it out. Yeah, a little different, but it should be fine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And what uh, like difficulty, was it just average? Like I don't remember. I think we brought-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So Absar, are you gonna be the, maybe next? Mmm, doesn't matter. One of us can be the big foot. Oh, we all have to be big foot. Well now we're committing to...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So many episodes, but like, I know I don't really have an interest in doing it. Okay. But I'll try maybe, but I would think Apsara would be a good first one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's where I could see, you know, I mean, I was watching some of, uh, what was the video that we did where we can hide as an object.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We've done a couple and I was watching.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm just, I'm just not aware. I just don't see things. Things can just be right in front of me, but I'll, I'll give it a whirl. Yeah, yeah, we'll figure it out. We'll see. Yeah. So, uh, we've been making stuff for the dumpster more. Yeah. Like, like stuff that's not a stream that we're just re-uploading.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but at the same time, at least this is, I think it's great to just start off, let people see you playing it for the first time, and that's it. You can just do one. Yeah, maybe an hour and a half, and it's like, I already recorded that. That's the nice thing, it's a dumpster, just throw whatever up there. Right, then if you already


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know, but it was fun to play it again. And, uh, yeah, I guess you were just talking about stuff we haven't played before, but yeah, it's also, yeah, just fun to get in and we just, just screw around.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I also think that it, it doesn't matter if we've, uh, played this stuff before, it's the dumpster. We gotta, we gotta stay true to what we originally said. Like I was, I've been tempted to go and play golf with just strangers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just have some fun and probably talk a lot of shit and you just go, eh, it's, it's golf with your friends. That's all it is. We can't, we can't put it up on the channel because we've already done that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like going and filming Axis. Yes, 100%. And that actually I think should go on the regular channel. Because I think that live action, us having that Axis competition, I mean, it would be a decent amount to figure logistically.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] See this? This is the, I'm showing it now. You like that guys? How gorgeous.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] NordVPN has been a great supporter of our show and community for years now. And if you still haven't checked them out, you're missing out on the peace of mind that comes with securing your personal data and your internet activity. I'm still surprised on how easy it is on the internet to just click on the wrong thing. And then bam, I'm screwed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When I use NordVPN, I could surf the web safely, but most important, I don't have to worry about it. Using NordVPN sets my mind at ease because when I download a file, Nord's threat protection automatically inspects it for malware and scans URLs and blocks malicious ones. And you can even route your traffic through two VPN servers, doubling your encryption.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you can use NordVPN on up to six devices on every major platform. Windows, Android, iOS, Linux. Even your Android TV supports NordVPN. So I know what you're thinking. Simon, I'm in.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sounds perfect. What do I do? Go to NordVPN.com slash needs to get a two year plan with a huge discount plus four months for free.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But Simon, what if I try it and I don't think it's for me? I'd say don't worry. It's risk free with Nord's 30 day money back guarantee. So go to NordVPN.com slash Neebs to get a two year plan with a huge discount plus four months for free. Thank you NordVPN.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We launched a super secret channel that nobody knows about.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay. And I didn't want to have one word off, cause I can change that in a couple of ways pretty easily. Not now, you said it. I did. Okay. That's a commitment. Well good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you know, I'm only dumpster material. And I love the fact that nobody could say no. Like I could record something now and I could play a game that might not necessarily have a payoff. But guess what? It was fun. And we can't say no. You can't say no.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I'm leaning towards being able to, you know, I mean, who knows.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One of us might get a bug up our ass and, and we could be recording something every week for this damn channel. That's why I'm thinking like it'd be nice to, the more videos we could put up on this channel, the week, the better. Fuck them. Just get them all notificationed up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're gonna get crazy on it though. You're gonna end up putting a ton of time and energy into it. Nope. I'm not. That's the rule. The rule is, what's the rule should be what? Like no matter what, no matter what, no more than one day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, we can at least put some, see, you gotta put, at least put some music in some little bit. No, no, no, no, no, you're in work.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is that how short some of the shorts are? It's called a short. I know, but shorts can be 30 seconds. You just did 4 seconds. It's a short. Who gives a shit? It's like a tick tock.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I can do, uh, how to make a sandwich video in like, probably 12 seconds.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It could probably be like, you know, there's bread, you know, ham, cheese, lettuce, boom, boom, boom, boom, bite it, done.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, in a video, I could make a Rubin in 15 seconds.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No. Oh, you know what? Yeah, no, of course I can. It'll be cold. Because, you know, and that's, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, hold on. Let me, uh, let me turn on my phone, put on my glasses.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We launched a super secret channel that nobody knows about! Very good job. Said it the same way too. What is it? It's called Neve's Magic Dumpster! Check it out! How's that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you know, but when the cream starts to smell funky.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And Vessi's are the perfect gift under the tree for your feet. Check out their holiday sale at Vessi.com slash NeebsGaming. Get the style and size you want now before they sell out. If you missed the sale, use code NeebsGaming for 15% off your entire order.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was up in, yes, New York, spending with family. It was very nice. Uh, watching some football, watching the Bills play and I was at my, um,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, well, you know what, it's only, uh, what is it, like, four months out of the year?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and it is like a weekend thing, so some people just have a lot of money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I got money, I got Tom, I'm gonna follow this sports team around the country. But, uh, it was, it was a fun time watching the game, but she was really getting, you know, getting into it. And if they would have lost, the Bills won. If they would have lost, like, I seriously think that she would have thought that Thanksgiving was, was ruined.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you know what? Let's face it, there's a lot of people who watch sports who bet a lot of money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you know, specifically, I'm sure Neves probably knows this, but uh, cause I think I talked to him years ago about it, but we consistently turn down sponsorship ads for that kind of stuff, just because.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, it's just too easy to get fucking hooked and they're not like trying to help you if you're going back, you know, like if you have a real problem, they're not going, hey man, maybe you got an issue. Maybe we can cut you off like at a bar, you know, when you're drinking, they're like, dude,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, if you can, and if you can stop after that point, go for it. My brother's particularly good at, at, uh, at gambling, which is interesting because, uh, he's, he's a crazy over thinker, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would say he's probably like 70% of the time. He's winning, like he's somehow, whatever it is, you know, whatever, and he plays craps. Whatever it is, he's good at it. How do you play craps? I have no fucking clue. That's where you roll the dice, right? Yea, I mean I remember playing many years ago. You said you got instructions on that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, and I think a lot of it also has to do like with my brother with luck. I just found it very interesting because I will believe in some sort of whatever it is like certain people have something going on because that's one thing that my brother did have and I did witness that his whole childhood. He always won shit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It does. So yea, you're right. In that respect, it is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So yeaah, so when he's, he'll go up to, like, he'll, I've been, I've been to Vegas and I've been to, uh, Atlantic City with him and yeaah, I've just seen him just go up to a table and be like, I'm just feeling like this. And then all of a sudden he'll, he'll fucking win, like, on roulette.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She'd be like, oh, okay, yeaah, he just picked up 500 bucks on a hunch.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What? Okay, oh, good. And he might dwindle a little away and then win a little bit back and he always ends up having more than he had before or he wins big or he- I lost 50. And you go like, oh, okay. That's it, okay. I always lose.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what makes me think like when you're, when we're, when we're looting, you know, when you level up a certain thing, you get better loot. You know, that's in seven days, but that's


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thank you to our sponsor Rocket Money. I don't know about you, but sometimes I forget stuff. When that stuff costs money, on a monthly basis, that sucks. I can't stand throwing away money on subscriptions, and an alarmingly high percentage of people have subscriptions they've forgotten about.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I just started using Rocket Money. As soon as I logged in, I'm in the app and I'm sifting through what things I'm going to be charged soon.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I see a yearly subscription to Sirius Satellite Radio that they were going to charge me for some streaming web thing


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Long story short, I saved myself over a hundred bucks because I then, oh, just right from the app. It said I could cancel from them or I could contact them. So I clicked contact them, got on the phone cause I had some questions about this. Absolutely turned out to be something I didn't want. And then I took care of it. Done.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Save money. Maybe for you it's an unused Amazon Prime account. Or a Hulu account that never gets streamed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But Rocket Money shows all your subscriptions in one place, and then cancels for you whatever you don't want.


[User] Please transcribe this text

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[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just go to rocketmoney.com slash Neebs. Seriously, it could save you hundreds per year. That's rocketmoney.com slash Neebs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cancel your unnecessary subscriptions right now at rocketmoney.com slash Neebs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wish I knew, I wish he told you what the fuck happened.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, it might have been a very simple, boring story that he just slowly built it back or it might have been, you know. That's nuts.


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[Assistant] Start cause I stopped cause I was losing but I think my luck is changing. Maybe I'll just start. Go for it. Go hard.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just, that would, that makes me think of I guess an app out there that's kind of acting like a lottery. So I guess you could do that now, which is pretty cool.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] With that, you could play in itself a lottery. So think of the Mega Millions. The Mega Millions is all the states put together. They've all agreed to be able to draw on this one thing. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And the revenue sources are coming in from all these places because they've all agreed to be a part of this. Well, picture, uh, an app saying, anyone in the fucking world


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Can come in here and play or it might be in this country or wherever it is and just say, everyone in here, if you want to, we're going to have our own drawing. You're going to give us money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And we're gonna maybe give you better odds of winning your money back and this and that and the other, just basically you do something like that. And I guess what? That stuff is, I'm speculating is what it's doing. Cause that's what I would do if it was me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Why wouldn't you? I mean, look at the, look at your, your lottery statistics that you get, like, believe me, if we were able to do our own scratch-offs, we're not allowed to. The state of Carolina, North Carolina has a fuckin'... Oh yeah. Monopoly on that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The odds of winning are bullshit. Imagine if we competed with like odds that were twice as good. Who the fuck is gonna buy their lottery ticket? You're still gonna make.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Crazy bank. Still gonna make crazy bank. All we're doing is giving them a lot better chances of getting their fucking money back. What bad is that? So, I think the app, I'm assuming the app is gonna do that, but I think that that's what it's gonna turn into. Like, who's got the best, funnest lottery?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'll take it. And if they still made a fortune on that, cause all you gotta do is do the math. You know what, or at least with that stuff, I guess there's other math.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, oh man, I wish, I'm not gonna be able to tell the story, but in, in, uh, long story short, for an hour,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So wait for an hour and he's like, he's like, it's already, it's like this beginnings of like a movie that he's going to try to write. Cause it's a funny concept.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, he had a ticket that if you played it in a different state, cause he's traveling, he moves. Oh damn it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm gonna fucking, I wanna give his business a plug. It's a Cut Above Moving and Relocation Services. And you can find them at CutAboveMoving.com. They do moving all over the country. And I will tell you this, I'm biased, but they are absolutely the best. So I'll show... I got you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, he's a mover, and this is his company now, so this is kind of nice because he's been doing it for a while, but anyways, he's traveling, he travels all over the freaking country.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Who doesn't love getting new undies for the holidays? Nobody, that's who.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And the holiday spirit just got real. Try Me Undies and get 20% off your first purchase plus free standard shipping and free returns when you go to Me Undies.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Shop classic plaids for dads, holiday sweater prints for fun friends, and the softest loungewear ever for all the cuddly ones in your life.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Available in sizes extra small through four extra large, Meandis has everything you need to make your favorite people smile this holiday season, all in one convenient place, and maybe a little something for yourself too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My undies for MeUndies continue to be my all time favorites. They hold me together down there like no underwear ever has. They are manufique. So if you want to get 20% off your first order, free shipping, and 100% satisfaction guarantee, go to MeUndies.com slash Neebs. That's MeUndies.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, and half of it's just going right back to the fucking- Mhm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you had to pitch a business, Nieves, you probably got one. No, you don't want to give it away, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That damn, it's probably been a couple years since I've watched any episodes. Okay. I do love the idea of watching people


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pitch their ideas and, and you know, most of the time when they're there, no, even the bad ones are worthy of showing because they will have some sort of.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, success, even the ones that are laughable, you go like, hey, you know what? You went out there, you, you, you've started something. You did have some sales.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you're a little crazy to ask for all this money and you're not really gonna make more, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So you'd be having what, like a rotisserie chicken as a, as an option or a meatloaf as an option. What else?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're right, I probably still around. Did they go out of business? I'm looking it up. Well they're, they're still selling their frozen shit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yeah, I don't know. But I had my first, so like I said, I was in New York for Thanksgiving. And I had my first garbage plate. And... Nick Tajos? What's Nick Tajos? Garbage plate.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All on a fucking plate and there are meat sauces, I guess, or whatever custom thing is. And I had mine at Binghamton Hots, which I guess is a franchise, which made me think like, but this thing just, it didn't look good. I heard they tasted really good and I was looking forward to it, but I looked at it and I'm like, excited to eat it, but going like, that can't taste good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, like it's like a pile of food here. You can look at, uh, I'll let you, uh, I shared it on Twitter, but here's a picture of the plate.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I'm going to hand it over to needs. I'll show you guys in the podcast. If you go to the video on YouTube, we'll show pictures of stuff sometimes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just a whole big mess of like, what the hell is this gonna be? And somehow...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Damn it. It all worked. It all worked beautifully. And the only thing I would add is french fries because I went there with my daughter and she had...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She added french fries instead of baked beans. Her's and I's were very similar. But I added french fries to mine too and I'm like, oh my god.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just be like, and the, and the place is probably like super simple. You just got whatever things you have, you know, uh, portioned out correctly, heated up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Listen, I don't want to talk too much about food around here, which is kind of bullshit, but those fucking donuts around the block are still, they're the best damn donuts I've ever had. Or at least some of the best donuts I've ever had. The donut king.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I do. Their bagels are okay, but you know, go there and pay, use them as lunch sometimes. Keep them in business.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thank you to our sponsor, True Classic, and guys let's talk about t-shirts. You know finding that perfect fitting shirt can suck.


[User] Please transcribe this text

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[User] Please transcribe this text

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[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I ordered True Classics three pack of t-shirts and they fit great. They're not boxy at all. They're super soft and I'm a big fan.


[User] Please transcribe this text

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[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I had, uh, new stuffing this year. It was really good. It was just different, but it was like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I mean, but I don't pay attention. You know, to me, it was always, see, they would talk about, oh, it's the, and, and I'd be like, oh, it's, oh, we're doing fish. That's right. Christmas Eve is fish. That was me from when I was a kid to me now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A flounder or a cod, there's probably not both.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You'll have like shrimp, you'll have scallops, so that, those are shellfish obviously. Salmon? You'll have, uh, your, uh, skonjili will be a part of it, which will be raw. No salmon.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, and they'll be like, uh, the, what do you call it, the fucking little squid.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, gallimard or calamari, whatever the fuck. Gallimari. And, uh, so that's one of them. And then maybe there's one that I'm forgetting, but there's one that we'll have mussels too. Clams.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, yeaah, shellfish. And then all of that, then you'll have the pasta, so then you'll have the pasta with the oil and the vinegar, and then probably like sardines would be mixed into one of the pastas, because sardines will be part of it, and then you'll have the, oh, not sardines, anchovies.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I bet that house fucking stinks. Yeah, and then something else. So yeah. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So what's your, what's the, you're on the PlayStation. What's your next go-to or one of your that you haven't talked about maybe that you've been playing?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So the questions thing, so maybe, maybe we should be doing the question thing right now. Because you know what? That could work, couldn't it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Let's do it. We need to go longer actually, because we have so many wonderful sponsors in the show today that we need to, we need to go long.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I can use music from... Artlist? Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Here we go, okay, let's start off with this. If you could have any superpower, what would it be and why?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey, today, hey, hey, uh, Nibs is here with us. Hey Nibs, how are you doing today?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, so, uh, ooh, next question for you, Apsro. What's up, baby? Everyone wants to know mountains or ocean.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pick this question generator, but I thought he, he went with it. Yeah. No, I'll do the mountains cause there's water in the mountains. Yeah. Do you want to hang out? Do you want to hang out in the mountains at your perfect getaway? Maybe I should have done it like that. That's a better question. Yeah. Take two.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, so anyway, back to you, Apsro. What's one place you've traveled that you never want to go back to?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anyway, next question for you, Absarro, have you ever saved someone?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] God, do you have a, I don't have an answer, but do you have an answer for that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A fantasy world to live in? Yea, and if you can live in the book, TV show, or movie.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what it's gonna get to. We're gonna be watching people die in like 50 years from today.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We should be exploiting children, somehow, because for the funny things that they say and do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How old are these kids? So that's what's good about this. You can take this concept.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So the concept I get, I can appreciate the concept. So what concept would you do? Cause you can take that and you can, I mean, the fact that it's kids, it's obviously a major part of this concept. It's a child is one thing and then they have a task to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, but there are obviously many different ways, things that you could do. It's just challenge. It could be an adult, just watching an adult have to figure out a task.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, with the banana and the penis? Yeaah. Like the vagina, like the woman having, uh, like, uh, the same kind of penis, but it opens up. Like banana peel. Shuts on yours. And then it closes on top of, or somehow, yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kinda, yea, but like, but it's more like what you see in these sci-fi movies that kinda opens up and it's got like teeth, minus the teeth. Yea. That would've been like horrific to think about.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was a, cause I was looking at an old book that I found in the trash cause I was a garbage picker.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, it was like dirty book, you know, but it was like, yeah, it was like, uh, I forget. It was like a famous, the joy of sex. I think it was. Okay. But they had like this profile picture of, and it added the penis kind of like sectioned off and like with lines going down and it was weird. I can't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right. I told you about my neighbor, didn't I? Did I bring that up in the podcast? Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you'd locked me in a room with him for like six months, I'd be like, you're right. I believe you. Like, you know, cause I'm, I'm that old and crazy. It's interesting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and that's pretty awesome to just go out there and it's so interesting to meet these people, see these people. Yep. Listen to what they have to say as, you know, as we may think they may be. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I'm using as purely like. But it is, it's tough because like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You should strive for A+. That's 95 and over. Yeah, like 95 and over. It should be really, A plus is what you go for. When you're like, you know, when you fall into like the news and you've got like a C.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I had a friend of mine that was from, I mean, an acquaintance from many, many years ago that was used in photographs that were used in stuff like that. So stunts that were about like a werewolf baby or something.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, how they do it, I agree with you on the staleness.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When it comes down to local news and then obviously even the mainstream news when you're looking at the people at the desk and hey, thanks bro for seeing me. Like that's weird. But I mean, but obviously it is, it is progressing. Like I just watched.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, and the same thing, you can go down and take a right turn at, wait a second, what, LEDs cause cancer? Wait, what, what happened with it? To the next thing you know, it's just like, it's a conspiracy and LEDs are sending messages to your brain.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So we should, we'll end today with be careful everyone, they're listening.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If it wasn't me at some point, I would have, like, taken a header and like, really...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then crazy pranks. You think it's funny to come into my house and take a shit on my floor? What is wrong with you? Cause that's gonna be what they're doing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That I'm doing. So if you end up going to New York, you'll be there a while?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's like a little tiny triangle of cheese and meat, and sometimes just...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How come sometimes when you take a shower you get out and the mirror is just covered in, you know, moisture? Well, that's from the moisture.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But then sometimes you get out completely clear. Your door was open.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Less moisture. Yeah, there was less moisture that time. So the other day. How hot was your shower? Well, like several days ago, I took a shower. I'm like, oh, here we go. Mirror, can you even see in it? And then the next day it rained. This was a rainy day. Took a shower. Shower's over. Mirror's completely clear. Huh. What kind of sense does that make?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How long was the shower? Was the shower the same length? Same length. Door closed, fan on, same lights on, so all that is the same. Something doesn't add up. There's something going on with the air.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But the, but the clear day was a rainy day, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know. Thanks, Neves, for starting it. You're welcome. I stayed in a hotel once that had a dehumidifier in it. It was like a Holiday Inn or something. And you had to empty that every day. Cause it got full every day. We're talking like a gallon of water in this thing. Wow. Yeaah. That's a lot of work for a person that stayed in a hotel, isn't it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do y'all have heated seats in your cars? Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, it actually doesn't right now. Uhm, yeaah, I took it in the other day for, uh, inspection. Actually, no, not inspection, cause I don't need those. Right. I thought, well hey, instead of an inspection, I'll just go get, I'll do the service, you know, get it serviced.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, who's got a car they've had for 30 years? You. So don't tell me what to do. You got it, buddy. Alright, so anyway, I'm like, hey, can you check the brakes? I don't remember the last time we did brakes. I think Alpha's on TV.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're gonna need to change that whole knuckle. You're like, okay, that's cool. It's old. Go for it. And then like a day goes by and like, hey, listen.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, they like me. They love me over there. Actually, you know who I was dealing with? The guy that got his picture with you years ago. Brandon. Over at BSI. Oh, oh, over there? Yeah. Them. Uh oh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're great, but you know, they were kind of doing me a favor going like, they're not a, they're not a auto repair place.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm sure the guy I bought it for was from was a, uh, pretty, like he was an older guy, but you could tell he's a pothead. Yeah, but I don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've taken the whole thing apart. I couldn't find it anywhere. You never know. I thought there was some hidden. Just fluffy nug seat cushion. It's all underneath. It's probably just all in the fibers. He probably just smoked in there so much.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was funny cause everybody was like, hey, even like friends of the family, not to me, but like to my mom or something. You wouldn't want to get pulled over in that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like yeaah, what a fucking- How did they get along with each other? They didn't-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Should've thrown a betta fish in there. It'd all be dead. It was just such a weird blend of fish. Joey's a weird dude.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, you have a dermatologist. Yeah. What were you checking out? I'm fancy. I get my skin looked at every now and then. Did you worry worried?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right about, uh, something? No. You know, you just want to have them like look at you and go, okay, that looks normal. I should do that. See anything. So there was a little spot on my back that just, I just didn't like it. Right. I'm just like, hey, can this go? Cause sometimes I scratch there. Yeah. I'm like, I'm gonna scratch that thing off one day. Just freeze it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Bring it on. You ever had like a little something burned off? Yeah. Planters Ward, I believe. Yeah. When I was a kid. Anyway, I couldn't see back there. I kinda wanna see what was going on, but they're just like, hey, this won't feel like much. Just lying the whole time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right. That's what that was. And then they burn it. Yeaah. And he's like, uh... Ritualistically.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do you have something weird on you? I mean skin line.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe they'd give you like a present, like they'd give a kid, like, hey, how about if I gave you a fireman hat? And then they chloroform him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was reminded of a dream today because Anthony and I had lunch and Anthony was talking about a hotel he stayed at in New York. I think New York. Anthony! What was that hotel?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Citizen M. I've not heard of it. But he said the rooms are real small, but real nice and real modern. You have like a tablet that controls the whole room, the lighting, the windows, all this stuff. And then there's big community areas you can use.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But uh, that reminded me of a dream, that I was going through this city and it was like building, building, building, cruise ship. But like on the ground. Like it was a building shaped like a cruise ship. And I thought that'd be great for Virgin Cruises to, or any cruise line really, just to build a hotel. Where the hotel is, you know, cause,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cruise cabins are really small, but yet they get the job done.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Have y'all ever been into like, you know how airlines have their like, premium, whatever, you get like the special card and you get to go in the lounge?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is that like something that comes with a credit card or is that something you pay extra for?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, well that's kinda nice too. I've been in there once, went with someone that had that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I feel like the waiting area is getting worse. I feel like back in the day you could usually find a seat to wait for at a gate. I feel like those days are over. Like if you're a little bit, even if you get there early, it feels like all the seats are gone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what they're kind of figuring out, how that's all working. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So all this time she's had no power bill. You would hope not. I forget. That'd be alright. That'd be alright.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know when the out is. Yeah, I know. It's an awkward out, sir. We're good at those. It's right now!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And also, I think Stranded Deep is in the same category as Green Hill.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Different maps to make it feel like the same world. Yeah. I'm surviving, you're surviving, how you doing? Yeah, it would be nice to have


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I have a question, cause I watched it, I enjoyed it. When you were out in that open ice area with a gun, what made you not want to try to attack that wolf right then?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That game's tough. Especially like, I'm watching you thinking, this is the right thing he should be doing right now. And listen, I'm usually driving and other people backseat gaming, so I know what it's like. Get in there and do it your damn self.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I'd never seen an ant hill until we jumped in with you the other day just to take a look. And you walked right into it. And they're gigantic. They are. It's as tall as you are. They're gigantic. It's huge.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Headphones would be better, but I think directionally it's gonna help you a lot. That's the rattle. But you need to, where, where is it? Was it to the right or to the left? With headphones it'll be more, more clear.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You guys are pretty neat, I think. We did a lot, you know, this community race, cause we looked at the whole campaign, cause other, other, uh, streamers and YouTubers are, you know, raising money for Stand Up To Cancer. And the night of, they were over 300,000. Yeah. And think like 50 of it was from our community. Yeah. That's great. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, buy them. It's like when you buy those, uh, returns from Amazon, you just buy a crate of old products. You don't know what you're getting. You can do that? Yeah. You can get like a palette of just returns from Amazon for like a couple hundred bucks. You don't know what's in it. It's just a palette full of stuff. So it's like Storage Wars. It's a YouTube thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I bought an Amazon pallet for... Did you?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I never watched a video, but that's what I got from the title.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You can't move with it though. No. I miss the, uh, just when the maps used to have little rocket turrets around the map. You're like, man, there's a tank. The random. And you can kind of run to that and help out a little bit. Yeah, that was nice.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now the field guns in Battlefield 1, did they turn all the way around? They may have.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well even then we never understood why they were flying us out. We were like, why are you flying us out just to play the game? You can just send everyone, and now, you know, EA's doing a lot more of that. They're doing, what is it, these little test betas for a day or two.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's a good thing though, because we saved the lady's life when we were there. So. Oh yeaah. Had they not flown us to London, she probably wouldn't be here today. Or at least, longer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She was in bad shape. Even with our help, she about didn't make it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But uh, today I was checking my email, and uhm, one of them was something I wanted to, you know, mark as unread, so I could go back to it later, and I hit delete and I'm like, oh!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There was no hitting anybody in the mouth or bugs involved, but I jumped. And quickly I go, well I just go to the deleted files and undo it. But it was funny that I jumped. Just not used to jumping. That's what you jumped at. That's so weird.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like, well, here's my take. I think, uh, I think he deserves all the success he has, but I think he's probably a little bit of a, I don't know, I don't know who his audience is. For me, I just grew up around people like that, so. I know. It's not funny to me. He's probably talking about you. You were the friend.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's just people that lived in Viewmont, you know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But no, he had a few things I thought were, were phony, but, uh, but, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like Nate Borgazzi man, I'm just cracking up at Nate Borgazzi. Yea, me too. Well crafted jokes, the timings all well thought out. And I have a lot in common with what he says. He's like, some people just aren't people that get their birth certificates. And I can totally relate to that. Cause like, I guess parents are supposed to give their children their birth certificates at some point.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they're, yeah, they're comparable. I thought, uh, Bargazzi's opening acts were pretty good. The one guy had one bit I thought was funny because I have a nephew who plays soccer but doesn't want to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He was talking about, he was such a fan of, I think the kid's name was TJ or something. TJ is my favorite, cause he does not want to be there. He's like, I got the foam finger that says TJ on it, and it's the middle one. Cause I can totally relate to my nephew not wanting to be out there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and his buddy was- Did they leave? I thought they did. That's our local, uh, soccer team. City soccer team. So is it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It wouldn't take no for an answer. They said dress the stage with hay bales because red neck. And you know when you can feel it? You're on a stage. Yeah. And you know what you're, you know you're coming across as I've blown this. Oh yeah. Oh no, trust me. I did it. It's funny.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't remember, if I did it wasn't much. How about the, what was the head count if you were to guess?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would say two, three hundred. Wow, that's big. That's a lot of money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Have they made a good Back to the Future game? No.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Let's go back to this time travel game. Didn't have to be Back to the Future, but wouldn't it be cool?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Let's say there's a, I don't know, if it's gonna be like a survival game or something like GTA, but. Like an open world. Open world. Yeah. And you go and here's a problem you can't solve with the weapons and resources you have. Because this enemy's too big, you're like, well let me go back in time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And plant a seed here. Start a little colony. Yeaah. And then when I go back in the future, I'll have a bigger ally.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you can't do it all the time, you have to like, find the resources to be able to travel. So it's a little bit expensive to do it, but when you do it, it's a big, it's a big result.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Have y'all been to Dallas and seen Elm Street in that area? They got like a conspiracy museum there. They got the fence where everybody writes stuff on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, we got a lot of, uh, droughts going on now. Water levels dropping in a lot of different places and all this stuff's being revealed. Dinosaur footprints. Old Buddhist statues that have been in our lakes. Really? Pretty fascinating, isn't it? Yeah, it is. Bodies. Bodies, barrels.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We had fires earlier. The Sequoias were in trouble. Now we're getting floods in the southwest.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. I heard they were like changing the color of their streets. Like making them lighter. Yeah. To try to bring the temperature down and stuff like that. Wow, interesting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's grey water. They do that in RVs and other stuff, you know? Right. Do it in houses.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's a good idea though, because we should do that in all houses, and also, like most countries that I've been to, other than ours, have like a half flush and a full flush button. Yeah. Yes. Right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you don't leave your lights on when you leave the room. That's a good idea. Lot of good ideas out there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was one, and look, we do not want them there. Nope, nope. I was kind of happy when it was like, wait, that's a mistake? Yes, let's remove them immediately. They're still there. Look, this might come as a shock, but we're not good at operating servers either. Alright, which buttons do we click? How do we change it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or, yea, maybe if we could just turn the bloodstalkers off and, uh, kill the ones that are there. Just kill them off in game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you remember in Crystal Isles, we had like all those lava dragons. We don't know the names of anything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What is the origin of the Griffin? What culture is that from? Now we got two people looking for stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, Pteranodon. That's wrong, isn't it? Pterodon? Yea, but they're spelled in the game, Pteranodon. We say Kitan right? We say that wrong too, don't we?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you're subscribed to this channel, you have to learn a different language.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, I could be wrong. That sounds more right. At least Absurd doesn't say Chassis anymore.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not drinking. Like, as a past tense.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right. Oh, I went out drinking? Uhm. I'm drinking! Nope. Nope, not like that. How do I use it now?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or drunken. Is it drunken? I don't even know now. But when I say it, my wife points it out. And it's wrong. Because you say drank.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, oh, I drank. Did you say I drunk? Maybe. I drunk, uh, seven red bulls?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just know I sound dumb sometimes and I'm unaware of it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Look, here's what I don't want to do. I'm okay if someone plays one of my songs and they're able to stop it, but if I'm singing live and they have nowhere to go, I don't want to put anybody through that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you gotta practice this stuff too. We don't usually have a lot of time to practice the songs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, will there be another form of music? Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We always do that though, don't we? In technology, we go, that's it. That's probably it. We've done it. We made the record. There's nothing else that can be done.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you gotta have some safety fallback, right? Right. Like you should have your phone numbers written down somewhere or just information you need, just some hard copy somewhere. Right, yea. Very true.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, there's a lot of people I don't call. I'm having a situation now where, uh, so when I got my new phone, they transferred everything. Uh, there was some cutoff apparently in my phone where, like, okay, from this time to this time, those people count, but from here on, don't count.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We don't know. We can't say dinosaur names, right? We're definitely not going to figure this out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Are you gonna get those fake muscles thick? Fake muscles? Yeah. Why?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Get like a wicked witch. Chin.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Are you gonna fix your face? Big jaws? No, I just...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it's cool to judge again. Go for it. Yeah, okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like, it's just, c'mon man. No, if you're at the grocery store, and there's a lizard man, in front of you or behind you in the line, you can't not go, okay, that's, I don't see that a lot. Unless everybody starts doing it. It's not a judging thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You shouldn't do it, but you could. But chances are good that you're not gonna have


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So when you explain someone to someone else, is it okay to say the race? Cause sometimes that is the dead giveaway and it would make things so much quicker. No, that's fine. No, I think it's fine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So once I was broke down the side of the road, and a van pulls up, Mexican folks, is that relevant to that story?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like it paints a picture though, cause I'm, it was a work van. I don't even think they spoke English and my Spanish was worse now than it is then than it was now. Man, that's wrong. Is now. Can't talk.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's probably confusing my brain. Anyway, so they, they put a bucket in the back of the van, sitting on a bucket. So, I feel like you kinda need to know. Well actually, I was gonna tell a story.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's why we don't want our channel to be bigger. Yeaah. Just too many headaches. Exactly. Alright. Too much scrutiny. Oh my god. Too much scrutiny.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Burrito Shack, man. Burrito Shack's so good. Oh, they're good. Hey, y'all don't know this, cause you don't come watch our streams, probably. Some of you do. I'm looking at you, guy that didn't go to our streams.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] On Twitch, twitch.tv, news game in. Anyway, so we rated, did I talk about this in a podcast already? I don't think so. I don't think so. We rated, uh, two weeks ago.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Someone that lives here in our, our very own town. And the reason I knew about this person was because he goes to Bridoshack and the guy that I go to Bridoshack and talk to goes, hey, you're a YouTuber? I know a streamer. He comes in here and his name is uh, Sketchy, Sketchy Tug.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, so one night we finished our stream, it's time to raid, and he happened to be, uh, uh, streaming. And I said, hey, everybody go tell him James from over at Breed-O-Shack needs gaming sent ya. Guy has no idea who we are. We never met, only heard about him. So he was like, just.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What is going on? Brito Shack? That's right! Yeah, here's my Brito Shack. My Brito Shack? What's happening? So it was great. So we ended up meeting up with him the next week. Anthony and I went and had Brito with, uh, Sketchy Tug over at Brito Shack. We got a picture. It was great. He's a great guy. Loves fishing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, and he's going to enter a mullet competition coming up at Captain Bill's coming up soon. I hope he wins. He probably will. He's got mad mullet skills.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, he actually has all of his hair long at the moment, and he's gonna shave it down to the mullet before the competition.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Michael Jordan's from here too. Yeah, that's true. He's from Wilmington.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I would assume, like, if I was in your position, I was in the Alpa Tribe, and I couldn't find us, which, we've had a lot of interaction lately.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'd be setting goals and building stuff, upgrading. Are you happy with what you got?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And if you're listening and you can't see this, it's a, uh, it's like half of the keyboard up top where your fingers are, WASD. And then the bottom part where your palm is, is like a mouse. So you're kind of moving the whole thing with your left hand.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's great. Looking forward to it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So sometimes I look back, uh, cause I'll be playing at my station and I'll hear Thicks going through the weeds in some game and I look over and he's, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's got the right hand on the mouse and it's not doing it's job so he'll have to switch to the left hand real quick. He's like on a few things and then go back and you're already being attacked by something. It's already a stressful situation.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's not a horror movie, but uh, I think I wanna see Prey.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Weird concept for Simon. It is. Yeaah. It's like, do I wanna keep doing this? Play this game for entertainment and joy. They make me do this at work.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You become a problem solver while you sleep. Yeah, but what were you saying? Uh, I could see that being more fun than just going, I just played this for a few hours. I just watched this thing for a few hours. You got something that's entertaining you for say weeks or months. This journey of going through a story and solving problems.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No it doesn't. Watch, hey, watch our super cut, Far Cry 5. It's brilliant, it's wonderful. If you look on there, all the comments are like, I can't believe I doubted this show. You guys are amazing. Neebs, I love you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It'd be funny if it was just us, like, at a grocery store. But actually, the store you go to. It was like a surveillance photo.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Explain what you're seeing, Simon, for those that can't watch right now.


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[Assistant] At a metal bar that you hang onto while you're in there and my face goes right into that bar, front teeth smashed in, obsessed, they had to yank them out, it was horrible.


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[Assistant] And uh, yeaah, that was an experience. I remember, I was really small. Mom had to lay on the chair and hold me so they could pull him out.


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[Assistant] And I guess I was conscious because I was peeing everywhere.


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[Assistant] No, no, because most of my life I had no front teeth.


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[Assistant] So as soon as these baby front teeth came in, boom, gone. Yea, you were real young. Contact your mom. Real young. Yea. So had no front teeth forever. And you need front teeth, really, to eat a candy apple, like uh, those red candy apples. Oh, that's right. Oh, and yea, the candy apple. Yea. So it just didn't happen. That might be why I like caramel apples so much. So when you finally got the teeth to eat a candy apple. Had one, I'm like, eh, caramel's the way to go.


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[Assistant] Yeah, this nasty hard glazed. Yeah. I wasn't missing anything. Yeah, no you weren't.


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[Assistant] Google, as soon as I start typing, it just pops up halfway through the question. 6-2.


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[Assistant] Is he an actor too? He was. Rob Reiner.


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[Assistant] Man, they're never gonna catch their- No, no. That's crazy.


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[Assistant] I never wanted to be tall. I still see so many advantages of being short. Just, I mean airplanes for one. Just being on an airplane. Short, that's the way to go. Well your legs and arms are the same length. So you're like a spider. Yeah, my wrist and ankles touch when I walk.


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[Assistant] Uh, junior, senior, yeaah. Yeaah. Me and a buddy, my buddy Terrence, we were both like 5'2", 5'3", going into high school. And then, boom, just shot up at the end of high school.


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[Assistant] Nope, just me. Terrence still short. But, you should see him on a plane.


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[Assistant] He's comfortable as hell. He can lay down. He's laughing now. On one seat.


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[Assistant] Okay, perfect. Does that come up? Cause now that I have a new phone, I see there's quick responses up top. Just some


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pre-selected options, like, okay. It should be on my phone, it's my response to a lot of people. Can you, maybe you can adjust that in settings.


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[Assistant] With my, with my new phone, cause sometimes they'll be like a s- like a


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[Assistant] Emoji will be an option for a quick response, and I think...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That I am gonna get more options of faces when I click that. But nope, it just puts that face and sends it and it's done. So, a few weeks ago, my dad text me and he's like, hey,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Your, uh, sister and her husband have COVID. And I thought, oh, I'll pick a face like, oh my gosh. Well, I sent like a laughing face. Right.


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[Assistant] I'm a Three Text guy, and that's, you're pushing it at Three Text.


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[Assistant] It's been this year. Years. How long? It's been this year. It's been, it's been maybe months.


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[Assistant] There's our problem. We don't know what a short paragraph is. A paragraph shouldn't be in a text. Any kind of paragraph.


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[Assistant] A juicy title. Yeaah. Let's see. Neebs vs. Security. Oooh. Neebs almost gets arrested.


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[Assistant] Yeah. Oh, that's right, there's one kid rolled up. He had a Simon shirt on. Yep.


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[Assistant] And a bludgeon. We shouldn't be your role models, kid.


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[Assistant] Nah, sorry, you take that picture, you put some blue lights behind it like he's getting arrested. Boom, there's your thumbnail.


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[Assistant] The show was fun! Yeaah. Yeaah, I had a really damn good time. Yep. And I didn't know what to expect.


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[Assistant] Coming from someone that's not into the scene, I can't, you know, I can't lie, I'm just not into the scene, but uh, now like, okay, this is a good entry point.


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[Assistant] Well the first day, that was a concert, MPC, and then the next day was a meet and greet, where I guess people were just meeting and greeting the 20 performers that were there.


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[Assistant] He sounded like he's from Norway. Well, since he has the Norwegian accent, he had a very high pitched voice. So it all kind of played into each other. It was fun. He was a great kid.


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[Assistant] With the outdoor area? Oh, for sure. Yeaah. Yeaah, with the outdoor area, easy. They got a big outdoor, like, backyard.


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[Assistant] But yea, the place, it's, I like how tiered it is, like, you have the front room, which is kind of a lounge, then you have the middle room with the stage for like karaoke, and then there's outdoors. So like, like if I would be in a place and it'd get too noisy, I could come over here for a bit. It was a little bit more chill. And then I'm ready to party again. So I'll go back into the noise.


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[Assistant] So yea, had a lot of just, you could just go anywhere you wanted. Felt nice.


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[Assistant] Yeah. You should have done like spin kicks. It took the record that night.


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[Assistant] Look at that stuff. Yeah, that'd be cool to do a show out of town. That's our next step. Should be lots of fun.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I've never been to an EDM concert.


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[Assistant] But even, even a small theater like that could work. Like imagine, imagine our Thursday night streams every week was in front of a live audience.


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[Assistant] If you could find a small enough theater, yeaah, something like level 5 would be perfect.


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[Assistant] Speaking of cool places, I mean we also, we were checking out another place potentially for a party called Marbles. Downtown Raleigh. You guys heard of that? No. It's uhm, I've been there with my daughter before. Did you say Marbles or Marbles? Marbles. The game that I used to play.


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[Assistant] Marbles, it's like a, it's a kids museum, which sounds like a weird place to have a party, but they, they do events. And they got like so many little games and things you can play, like you build little race cars and race some giant, uh, chess.


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[Assistant] Exactly. It was a cool spot. Not as cool as Tim's. And you can drink.


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[Assistant] Okay, so this place isn't open yet. I think it is open. It is open.


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[Assistant] Yeah, you get the audience involved, you're questioning people, it's kinda like half improv-y. Yeah, well it's fun.


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[Assistant] Might be a good show, we'll do this anyway. It might be, I mean it'd be fun, maybe. This could be a cool venue anyway, so it might be worth just a check out for that.


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[Assistant] Yeah, well good for him man, Pitching Forge. It must be a pretty chill place to live. I've heard that's a cool place.


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[Assistant] I've been there before, I was younger, but yea, I've been there before. It was very touristy, the part I was in, but I remember being fun. Dollywood, yea, right around there. Be cool to work for Dolly. Yea, why not? Probably half of fucking Tennessee works for Dolly.


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[Assistant] Like Mickey Mouse in Florida is like, oh yea, you live in Florida, you probably work for Mickey Mouse.


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[Assistant] I'm gonna make my own, sell it. Yeaah. I bet the boys that are in it, like full blown, they have like a warehouse.


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[Assistant] I had one trick that I had to know when I was a kid. Uhm, my uncle, uh, was a smart guy, worked at IBM, but he had a side hustle as a clown. Okay. And, uh, he had this trick, I didn't know how he'd do it, but he would take a cloth and put it in his hand and the cloth would disappear. Mhm. And I'm like, what the?


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[Assistant] Yeah, that intrigues me. Cause yeah, alright, a magic show without using your hands? Yeah, like they are. I wanna see that.


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[Assistant] Great characters except for the mains. And the book. Fuck the book. The book can suck it too. You know what? Simon likes the book.


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[Assistant] Our last recording on the dumpster, we were kind of getting sick of it by the end of it too, because we were playing Elden Ring. And we were fighting this horse boss. It wasn't happening that night. It was just like, one more, one more, one more. I was like, God, I've already been at the office 12 hours, I'm done.


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[Assistant] That's true, cause yea, if you play it and then jump away from it, yea, you're just gonna forget it again. Yea, if you have like a nice play session, you can get used to it.


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[Assistant] That's right. That's right. We should have seen if we could have got him to subscribe. Right, exactly.


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[Assistant] I wonder what he's eaten since, cause he was awful hungry.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's the worst. Grumble belly. Yup. Oh yeah.


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[Assistant] You know, you just don't see many Irish setters out. They're so amazing. It's just not, you know, you see labs all over the damn place. Irish setters are a rare thing, I feel.


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[Assistant] I think a dog's a great place, or a bar is a great place for a dog.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's topical now. Well, I mean it was then, but you know.


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[Assistant] No, but uh, great turnout, friends and family, all that stuff. Yeaah. I mean, it was just, it was a great day. The weather was perfect, it was...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, I'm gonna start with my, uh, with my lady. I think it starts with her.


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[Assistant] The women's. The women's, right? Yes. And there was a man sitting there taking care of himself. Pulling the old putt, as they call it. Right there on the shitter. With no luck. No luck or nothing, and I don't even remember how, I mean, she just laughed obviously, but...


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[Assistant] So that was, it was still bright as hell outside, you know?


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[Assistant] So they got kicked out, got in their vehicle, I think it was like four of them, I don't know. Did they drive away? They did, I remember them like-


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[Assistant] Well, I'm surprised the cops didn't get there in time because they were like at the edge about to pull out onto the road from the parking lot for like, felt like 15 minutes just sitting there.


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[Assistant] That was Riverfest weekend down here, which is one of the two festivals downtown, Riverfest and Azalea Fest, which is usually a shit show. You know, amateur weekend, people coming in and getting sloshed, so I'm pretty sure they probably went back downtown where they belonged in the first place, and uh, I'm sure they had a great rest of the day.


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[Assistant] Have any of y'all been to End of Days? No, what's that? You might have talked about it, but it's the distillery. It's one of the distilleries downtown.


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[Assistant] Oh, awesome, man. It's like, uh, you know, the brewery thing. Obviously, breweries are everywhere. There's a dime a dozen of those, but uhm, the distilleries popping up is pretty cool. This stuff is so good, like they make all, you know, gin, rum, whiskey. Yeah.


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[Assistant] Smooth. Yeah, so we went to that place, kinda got a little tour of the distillery which was pretty dope.


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[Assistant] It's in like an old Quonson hut, an old military, like don't, kind of those like,


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[Assistant] Dome. Like a hanger? Hanger looking, but like a smaller kind of hanger, you know? Right. So they got it done in, it's in one of those that was always close to downtown and uhm.


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[Assistant] Just delicious crap drinks and stuff, overpriced of course, but it's like they're making their own liquor. The branding's really cool. You've heard of Kraken, right? Yeah. So I asked like, cause I think


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[Assistant] That's, I mean, you know, these days where there's so many selections, if you can have your branding stick out at all and they just have these beautiful


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[Assistant] Yeah, but he does all their uhm, their logos and stuff.


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[Assistant] Except for the helicopter pad next door. Except for that, yeaah. Yeaah. I wanna get us an end of days liquor. A Neebs liquor. That'd be awesome. Yeaah, well we've talked about it before. A Neebs game and liquor? Yeaah.


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[Assistant] And there was a food truck, it was like a paella truck, right? I mean, whatever, all these places have food trucks. But there was a another truck that was selling plants. There was a plant truck.


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[Assistant] We were talking to this girl about the plant truck, I was like, that's a pretty cool idea, if you're in the right place, of course. And she's like, yeaah, it works at some of these places pretty well, but she said, her just, um, holin' up at like a


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[Assistant] You ever see the one out in Leland? You ever see there's like a big...


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[Assistant] It's not stra- like Mr. Softy, I'm sure the ice cream, the soft serve kinda goes longer. Yeaah, longer and- This is shorter.


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[Assistant] It looks like a turd. It's just like a big ol' turd on an ice cream cone out there. It's pretty amazing. It's still there. It's still there. Gotta leave that there. It's not an eyesore at all.


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[Assistant] Man, I- it's probably around that. Ah, it's probably like eight. I just remember a, uhm...


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[Assistant] My brother was seeing a girl when he was in high school, he was seeing a girl that...


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[Assistant] Did rodeos and stuff like that. So my mother, my mother, my brother and I went to go see his girlfriend's rodeo in South Dakota. Sioux Falls, South Dakota. And there was a motel there just as...


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[Assistant] And even as a kid, like, you know, I'm sure I got a couple quarters for my mom, throw it in, and like, oh, this is exciting, and then, like, within seconds, you're like, oh, alright. Like, I don't know what to expect. Are you? I just put another quarter in.


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[Assistant] It's a good question. Like, what are we dealing with here that makes the whole bed with your weight on it still, you know, what's under there? What's going on?


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[Assistant] Unless you just fall in love with it. They should be gas powered, that'd be fun.


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[Assistant] Yeah, one of the old ones. That's been there forever. Has it? The one out by Porter's Neck or the one- Monkey Junction. Oh, gotcha. Okay, they used to have one out by the Porter's Neck one, but like, that was years ago.


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[Assistant] Keeps the homeless people off. Has she ever smiled on one? Yes. She loved it. She's faking that.


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[Assistant] And I'd say, get out, you stupid little kid, fine. Go run around the parking lot, find a penny on the ground.


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[Assistant] Oh, and then it would have to start getting into- Oh, that's another channel. Toddler's on tablet.


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[Assistant] Guess you wanted to see a movie today, but guess you can't. I'm going to have to pat you down.


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[Assistant] It's the only place I'll have a soda ever anymore in my life. Like I just don't drink soda, haven't for so long now. But if I go to a movie, I'm getting a Cherry Coke. It's funny.


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[Assistant] I happen to, upon a uhm, it's nothing like that, but as far as just all the random channels, and this one, this makes sense, but uh, uh, the Tesla Barbarian, and he's from North Carolina somewhere.


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[Assistant] Got the accent and I know it, I've seen the plates and stuff like that, but his thing is like having Tesla haters drive his Tesla.


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[Assistant] Stuff like that, and it's just, it's fun to see haters. So rural North Carolina, I'm guessing. Yeah, I wonder where. But uhm, kind of just a simple, brilliant idea that is fun to watch, except...


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[Assistant] His problem is like, in the beginning of everyone he gives the, uh,


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[Assistant] He's driving and he kind of explains the whole he does that for like the first like every video like come on, man


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[Assistant] So, how do people react usually? Like, get giddy, like a kid, like it's, it's a, it's always that reaction.


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[Assistant] Like even in my, like in mine, it's, it's a pretty consistent reaction no matter age or whatever, like you're seeing smiles or laugh, or hearing laughter.


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[Assistant] And they, you know, they get fat, like, so much faster than, uhm, my, uh, dual motor three. Uh, he borrowed one, someone, maybe a viewer must have let him borrow his, uh, I didn't know they made the, you know the Model X is the SUV.


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[Assistant] I didn't know they made a plaid version of that. Plaid version? Yeaah. There's a plaid model X out there. I didn't know they did plaid. I don't know what plaid is. Plaid is like the fastest model S. It's from uh, Spaceballs, right? From Spaceballs, yeaah.


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[Assistant] 2.1 seconds, 0 to 60 or something like that. It's fucking crazy. So the Model X, uhm, they borrowed that and see in the reaction of, uh,


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[Assistant] Him and his passenger and that's pretty fun because it's like...


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[Assistant] He said, they were saying it feels like it's about 30 or 40% faster than like what mine does. Right, and yours is shocking. Right. So I just, I couldn't even imagine that speed.


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[Assistant] That's still very bold, and just around the corner if you think about it.


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[Assistant] And I wouldn't want, like, think about, it's already snowed in fucking Minnesota this year, like it was last week or something like that, which is just crazy how chilly it is up there already. But, uh, I wouldn't want my car up there.


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[Assistant] Yep, which uhm, you know the line up of that, can I tell ya? Like uhm, Kevin Hart's like hosting it, uh, Sudeikis is there, Steve Aoki is DJing the party and shit, it's gonna be a good old time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When's this dropping? Next week? Yea, next week. Next Thursday? So, okay.


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[Assistant] So yea, if you're listening to this today, then the finale for Ranch Sim is this coming Tuesday.


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[Assistant] In about 5 minutes from when we're recording this, the second to last episode will be dropping.


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[Assistant] Long before us, you know what I mean? Wasn't all that far before. It really wasn't. Which is kinda nuts when you think about it.


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[Assistant] The same building? Yeah, we were all ready. Oh, except for-


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[Assistant] You were at your house and then uhm, up in Raleigh wasn't, uh, didn't we have?


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[Assistant] Who is our, part of our community? Oh, is it Val? Yea. Val, Val and Gro? Yea.


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[Assistant] Uhm, and then we were set up right here.


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[Assistant] So we did, there were four of us, yeaah. So, we'd probably have to do some, some remote stuff. That was, that was when we had to have the, the cords and the sensors. Yeaah, so we don't need any of that shit with the, the oculus. I've got two.


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[Assistant] Three and you could be at your place if we needed, you know? So that's, yea.


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[Assistant] It's not going anywhere man, not with, you know, the PS5 one and all the meta shit, like, obviously they're not, it's not going anywhere.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's cringe here in like any of the commercials, like, what the fuck are these voice actors or whatever? Like, it sounds horrible. I don't know, it just sounds so fakie.


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[Assistant] Yeah, they seem, they seem just like late to the game and like the quality. It just doesn't make sense it looks like that.


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[Assistant] I haven't seen one thing that's intrigued me at all. That is bad marketing, I would say. They gotta get the Kraken guy.


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[Assistant] The history of Facebook and VR is uhm, I mean interesting, you know what I mean?


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[Assistant] That thing, like, again, timing-wise with COVID and, um, and all of us at our, you know, uh, at our homes and stuff, like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The two games I was so thankful for through COVID were Warzone and Among Us.


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[Assistant] The timing was just perfect for Among Us to get kinda big and shit. It worked for us. For sure.


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[Assistant] I don't think so. You would hope that'd be a setting maybe?


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[Assistant] Because if the game's intention is for, yeaah, not talking unless it's a meeting, you know?


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[Assistant] We're all in here with Abzro right now, Abzro hurry up. Going to you Abzro.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Why is he- you can't understand when he's peeing. Right. That's- that's how he talks. It is. Updates? You wanna give an update?


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[Assistant] I'm gonna go to an oyster place and get a Miller Lite.


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[Assistant] I remember that roughly. And this giant koi fish. It's like the megalodon. It's terrifying because you're so tiny. Yeaah. And koi are usually so sweet. Not when you're a bug. No, no.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you played single player, I totally get it. Yea, that makes sense. You kind of feel like you're not alone, obviously, you know? Wait, do you play it with the other...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When you're single? No, it's just you, isn't it, if it's single player? Just you. I don't have them running around like AI or anything. No, yeah, not bots or anything. Gotcha.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're bringing frozen meat in from China. But they're in the meat business.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's like asking a bartender, you know, how do you guys make this Miller Lite?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I keep bringing up Miller Lite. I see the analogy. I apologize for my stupidity. It's alright. It's alright. I do love taking a bite now. Seeing some fennel in a sausage just makes me happy. All the good stuff in a sausage.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Fennel, those little seed things, very particular taste.


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[Assistant] Yeaah. Right on Halloween. I asked the guys, you mind if I drop this on Halloween Eve? And it had a spooky ending. So spooky. Shoulda go for it, baby. It was all spoops. Didn't see that coming, did you guys? No, I did not. And then there were like, uh, there was a bunch of like, you know, man, it was a lazy ending.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, I don't know, you can't make everyone happy, you know what I mean? No.


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[Assistant] Definitely. Oh, and also the uhm, some people had an inkling that it might have been scripted a bit. You think? What? To the last episode.


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[Assistant] Cut that together so I can start putting together the flashback pieces. But everything we recorded...


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[Assistant] It's weird. They're all weird. I get it. I didn't know where to go with Ranch and Apso brought that weird fucker in there as a character, you know? And just rolled with that, of course.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. I'll take that. Yeaah. I'll take that. That's good. You don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One thing not in Bra- like, uhm, Absuro's character being a- having made love to a meatball and then there's a baby meatball. That just happened.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's such a dumb series, I loved it. So yea, I'll probably go into some uhm, couple one-offs and figure out what's next of course.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, like physically. Exactly. That'll be really cool.


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[Assistant] Is it just a matter of getting out? Is that the goal? Yea, get the notes and get out. Okay. Oh, so it's like, oh, the notes makes me think of, uh, Slenderman.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right. She shouldn't be there that late. Okay, well noted. Noted on that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, that was a great, great melee. Oh, I do like some Conan melee for sure. Mhm. I've been watching Glock play that a little bit. I watched Glock start his new series which is called Get Wrecked. Okay. His new Seven Days one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He made as much of the world as, uh, Wasteland. Oh god. As he could. So it was about 40% of it. Okay. That's where it was allowed, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The first episode was really, really entertaining. I think it was about 40, 35, 40 minutes or whatever. Okay. But it was from the time he gets in right there and like decides he's gonna, it was just nonstop fucking drama. Like he couldn't catch a break and it was very entertaining. It was really cool. He goes into like this.


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[Assistant] Tiny little house, right? Yeah. And because seven days is seven days, you know, he's like just going to clear that for his base for like the night or whatever. Just the basic right off the bat base and looks in the corner and there's of course a trap door, little hatch going down and that he hasn't even cleared all that. Like he went down and there was, he's got some mod.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kapo mod, but there was one point he went down, and there's like a big ol' one of those hardcore doors, the...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Vault doors? Yeah. Mhm. Opens that and then he's like in a room where there's like three other vault doors and another, another uh, patch? Hatch? Hatch down. Shit like that. So it's like a really big, kind of intricate thing. And that's the mod doing that? I think the mod is adding the amount of, um, zombies


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because after his second altercation with some, uh, zombies down there, cause he brought them up, the first ones that came out, he moved into the next section after a while, after he'd dealt with them, cause he had to like lure them outside and shit. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know how he plays, he'll put up his little uh, the little channel hatch. The hatches and use that and stuff. Anyway, the second time when he lured that group outside, there might have been 50s on this.


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[Assistant] Like for real. Just under one house. Yeah. God. It was insanity. It looked like a horde knight.


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[Assistant] Good for him. And I saw that, uh, Glock reached his goal.


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[Assistant] Nice, good. Doing well with him, so that's cool. Yeah, Freaker's a cool little company. Gotta love that homegrown shit.


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[Assistant] For now, until we have another, our live show, so. That's right, yeaah, you won that three years ago. I did, just versus Simon and nobody else, so yeaah, I deserve it, fair and square.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah. But the most dramatic round of, uh, mount your friends you're gonna probably ever see. Yeaah, well maybe next... In front of 500 people anyway.


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[Assistant] Speed runners, you little shit. That's good stuff though.


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[Assistant] How's everyone's Halloween? Did y'all have a good Halloween? Great! I dressed up. I saw you. I saw you. You had a good costume, Neebs. Yeah, you like it? Yeah.


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[Assistant] That didn't look good. That could calm me down a little bit.


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[Assistant] Uh, Gabs and I wanna, uh, we wanna contest. You guys had a great costume. That we didn't enter. That's right.


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[Assistant] You were Wario, right? I was Wario, she was Waluigi. And uhm.


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[Assistant] They're like the dark versions of Mario and, and uhm, and Luigi. Uh, kinda like, they're like the, I don't know, I don't even know why they exist or, I don't know. Yeaah, yeaah, yeaah, I just saw it and went like, oh that's like-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I did it to a lot of people. There were some people that, but yeah, um, her take on Waluigi was, um, like sexier than I expected. Right? Sexy Waluigi. It worked.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A couple times. Yeah, that was fun. And then, yeah, Bobby. It sounds all biased because we know the owner, but apparently the bartenders all voted on their favorites. Yeah, we got like a hundred dollar gift certificate for best couple.


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[Assistant] No, no, but she's clearly accident prone, but like I hate I was even, whatever, we were sitting at the bar, the tall stools. Okay.


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[Assistant] Her stool was a little messed up on the top or looser, like uhm, the seat part was one of the, how it was attached to the, you know, the legs was


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is it like a spinning one? Not connected. No, it wasn't spinning. But it was like loose or whatever was holding that there. So she grabbed underneath, you know, to scoot forward.


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[Assistant] That's what happened at Bonefish and of course we told like the bartender she didn't seem to care very much.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's a fun game. I mean, I guess I'll watch. I'll watch. I'll figure it out. I won't ask questions now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Things in the works and coming out to replace them. You know, I know everybody on the channel is missing the ranch sim. I get it. I get it, guys. Yeah, come on. Shut up about it, for Christ's sake. And Gen Zero, I mean, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You might, but are you? I mean, that's not what they're portraying. Yeah, it's like a Matrix thing, maybe. It's like, it's not real, but you're


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't think I've ever eaten there, so I'm excited. It's a really good cheesesteak. Okay, rock and roll. They kill it. Like, there used to be a few of them in town, this might be the only one remaining? I don't know how that works. We used to go to the one by Ritesville Beach.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, flat and clear and, I mean, look at the river. Look along the river now. It is.


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[Assistant] And now they got this whole apartment thing, like behind the Live Oak, not behind it, but like, all these apartments that are like looking at Live Oak, uhm.


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[Assistant] Like if you have one of those balconies. Oh man, yea. You got free shows. You got free shows, that's all you're doing. You're watching live nation shows, yea. Holy shit. And there's like two of them, they're connected, two big buildings, they're connected by a bridge. I guess there's this walkway. Ah, that's beautiful. It's kind of neat, so yea, downtown's.


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[Assistant] Really change it. Except for where I live. It's super slow. It'll get there. I know, I know. Like, give it one year.


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[Assistant] And that really is everywhere though, like every damn place is like growing so fast, uh, for the most part.


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[Assistant] You got the front and the back and then you boop and it opens like a mouth. Okay, so they got the one suggested slit. Yeah.


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[Assistant] I have problems. Pringles? I can't do it. Here's the problem with the slit technique, that option. Uhm, and mostly with like, if you're, say you're getting a little two pack of Advil or something, you know, the whole slit, the suggested where you do the rip in the bag.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That suggested little slit isn't always there.


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[Assistant] You know when it doesn't work when it went through the pack or the you know, the whole packaging and all that stuff Sometimes, you know some of them missed and now you got a problem. Mmm. No, you got a problem Now you gotta use your teeth now. You gotta use your teeth or find that scissors. All right. Yeah got a real big problem


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[Assistant] You got a problem. You gotta find a chip clip. I hope we don't have a real big third world country, uh, uh, base.


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[Assistant] You know, bacon on and stuff that I reheated and have a little late night snack and I threw some garlic butter ritz on it.


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[Assistant] That would kill my girlfriend. She can't handle a normal Bojangles chicken sandwich. It's way too spicy for her. Like she'll be in hell. So zero tolerance for heat at all.


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[Assistant] Like Texas Pete, I could just drink, just drink it. That and Tabasco is just like, it's just like vinegar to me compared


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[Assistant] And you, you relied on it to add flavor to your MREs. You're a little meals ready to eat. But they had Tabasco on the chow hall and a lot of just, you'd see people like


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Tabasco on everything and, and yeah, I got, I gained that then. There you go. I do love it on eggs for sure. Definitely works. Draw that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So we'll see. There you go. We don't have much room for error, uh, in the Darkness Falls sense anymore. Oh good god, that last horde. I think we've learned that. I think that comes out this week, right? There's no bouncing around and creating new bases anymore.


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[Assistant] And this is a great segue, speaking of Duke. Yes, that's what I did it for. I did it for you. Alright, so look. I had brain cancer.


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[Assistant] Possibly still do. We don't know. Fuck it. Fuck it is right. But. Fuck that cancer. April 30th, 2022.


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[Assistant] Angel's Among Us, it's a 5k walk of hope.


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[Assistant] Yeah, well, uhm, I can, I can actually form a team, which I will do. I will get you the link.


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[Assistant] And anybody who's in the Raleigh Durham area, wherever, if you just, if you want to come walk alongside the team, you can do so.


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[Assistant] Yeaah, well I guess some people run. Yeaah. I'm not into running.


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[Assistant] It is called Angels Among Us. We're not playing Among Us.


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[Assistant] Don't pay attention. I've not paid attention to college basketball.


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[Assistant] And just to clarify real quick, because at the beginning of that whole Duke thing, I was like, I may or may not still have brain cancer.


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[Assistant] I'm doing great. Awesome. Yes, you are. I still have fucked up dexterity with my right hand, but everything else... I feel like you're gonna use it.


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[Assistant] Jiggly's in my wrist. It's funny, I was, uh, at Occupational Therapy today, and, uh, they gave me some putty. So, to strengthen these two fingers, like my pinky and my ring finger, and so I'm doing these exercises, and she's like, yeah, and you can take this home. I'm sure your insurance will cover it. And I'm like, what? You just gave me putty.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And listen, one of the other, one of the other, and I guess I can't be charged for this, one of the other exercises that I have to do is go through the, uh, American Sign Language


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[Assistant] No, I wanna see like, middle-aged white ladies do that because that's always awesome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To do all these quests. Resurrect cats.