[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was thinking earlier today, I was like, you know, we have that discussion about hot dogs being sandwiches or not. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's not a sandwich. The hot dog is the piece of meat. Because you've heard people say, hey, can you go to the store and get hot dogs and hot dog buns?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The ol'. Pigskin. See, things have different names. Yeaah. So, Frankfoogey. And hotdog are the same fucking things. They are, dipshit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, one of the things I love watching are the bloopers from Always Sunny. Oh, they're wonderful.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They are some, yeaah, they are some of the most insane athletes. They're very gifted athletically.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because they were like, they were like superheroes. They were gods. Okay, that makes sense. Yeaah. They were in the arena. You know, I've met a lot of celebrities. Okay, you know, Christopher Walken, that was a cool one, nice to meet you, whatever. Never got starstruck on anyone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like a big name wrestler, I don't think. But yeah, such an interesting career and they lead to so many weird lives.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I worked with a girl at the Hard Rock Cafe in Los Angeles at Universal City Walk and she was in the WCW and I was like, please, do one of those slaps across my chest. Just fling me back and do it. And she never would. And then one day she just reared back.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And thanks for stopping by. Yeah, thank you. Uh, I guess Simon's, he's looking, he's looking hard. All right. And when I say he's looking hard, he's erect. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I hate him. Right, we hate him. Hey Siri, who directed Nightmare Alley?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I keep seeing stuff for Small Land, like popping up on Twitter. Okay. The survival game, that looks kinda like, looks kinda like grounded, but I hear it's way better. Bigger, right? Bigger in scale? I believe Glock9, uhm, may have tweeted about it recently.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No? I know sometimes the devs stream it, so maybe he's...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One of the things with Small Lands is it's got a season cycle, so. Oh cool. Fall.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Listen, it was our idea, uh, so if anyone's having a problem with it, it's not like a replacement. He's filling in a gap right now, and I'm sure


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but it's been, it's been still fun. We're just killing time over here, you know, waiting on you. We're working on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Here's what we want ARK 2 to look like. And maybe not look like, what it should be able to do. What ARK should be like. Be like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Me too, because Vin's involvement, you feel like there's this obligation of making him


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, yeah, we're not really paying attention to grounded.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh man, it's just like, you know, like I was bringing up Half-Life 2 and games that do it right where as far as like the bane of your existence, the whole game. Yea, the spiders are intense right off the bat. When you can take control of them eventually, like end game or later game in, in ground. You're saying if you could, right? If you could. If you could take over a spider and be riding that fucker around.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, they eat, they eat chlorophyll, I'm pretty sure. I'm shaky.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what I'm saying, you could order a bag of refrigerated aphids. That's what we had in like second or third grade. I remember like having, just looking at aphids.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I just think it was probably a school science thing. You know? Because there's a market for that. Some that you can't, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know. So I'm out. He's not a reader. He's like, books? Ouch. No, no, no. I like books. I don't want to be part of the movie. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He gave a hundred million to Dolly Parton to do charity work. I'm like, why didn't you just do the fuckin' charity work? Because she gets to choose it. Ah, probably.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's the real reason. Everything I've ever heard about her, she's just like a pleasure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My girl lost her, her fob, her, you know. Key fob? Yeah, yeah. And she's gotta use like the, the primitive key. Oh, gross. And she fucks it up, puts it upside down. It's like, oh my god, we are the worst. We have just like degraded ourselves. I have a key in my car.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So is the screen, does it have a line in it when it's unfolded? Nope.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and he even wants his phone to last forever. I just don't know why the full- Okay, I gotta see one, clearly. Cause it's like buying a car like, you know, how many times is this door gonna shut? You know, it's not gonna work at some point.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How far are you in? Ten hours. Ten? Any guesses on how long though?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's a lot of garbage, a lot of debris around here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The Beach Boys have so many great songs. They do. And such a unique sound.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's throwing me off here? Not really throwing me off, but like... Get a good picture of Neeb's butt for the audience.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Take your pants off, Neebs. But the outside on his jeans, he's got the, the tag. It has this, the size and everything on the outside. That's great.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They look like the Starsky and Hutch cars. Those are great. I mean, they're a unique looking car.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like these days the youth are a lot less driven to get their license, no?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I mean, uh, throw COVID, Uber, Lyft in there, and there's a lot less incentive, I believe. That's true.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To a certain point though. You can. Man, trust me, you can. These days, no, these days the old cars, old quote unquote


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You have a very old car. Yeah. But like you can't repair on your own half the shit in a car that's kinda considered old now. Like a 20 year old car now, 15 year old car is gonna have a lot of that computer shit in it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That you can't do anything about it. I mean... And shit you can't reach unless you go to a particular, you know...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The cars that you can actually fix, they are just, you know, they're disappearing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I could dig on that. But you could fix everything in your car. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. And like if something went wrong with my car, like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I have to go to a computer repair shop, you know, pretty much. It is just a computer. And I don't hate it because yea, I don't have to change oil or anything. Do you have to leave town to fix your car?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would probably have to go to Raleigh or have someone come from like Raleigh. Okay. I don't think there's anything around here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Jarringly slows you down more than you would. A lot of people drive them like just using the one pedal and never their brakes because...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If it's not down, you're stopping. But you get used to it like in a week, you know, if you're driving that way. I kind of love that and it, and it makes you not have to replace brakes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I tell you another thing, just as far as like, time goes and I guess, I don't know, it's not really topical, but you know how we're uhm, they just launched this next moon? Artemis. Artemis? Unmanned. Unmanned. Which is, it just got me thinking, I was like, it's been 50 years.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I thought I heard that. I think it's just the real estate of it all.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, that's true. Uhm, be a great place to see the planet blow up though, from, right? Yeah, well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, we see water and sand moves when there's different vibrations and different things played.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There are certain devices like, uh, god I wish the name, he's a guy that would talk about it, that were made so fucking long ago that you see it and you're like, how did they?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How? Like it doesn't make sense that they could build that and it's like so adva- like-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is the, this is the thing that I remember, that I was talking about. The Antikythera Mechanism. What's that? An ancient Greek hand-powered orrery, described as the oldest example of an analog computer used to predict astronomical positions and eclipses decades in advance, like... Wow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pretty cool. And you look at it, you're like, yeah, I wouldn't picture that fucker back then.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm all about it. I've had a Thanksgiving Benedict. Yeah? Mhm. For breakfast? Yeah, for breakfast before. Mhm. There was a place downtown that had like six different kind of eggs Benedict. And one of them was a Thanksgiving one. Hell yea. It was kind of a similar idea.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're going to Floyd's, down in Moorhead City. Floyd's is great! That's where we're having Thanksgiving. Yeaah, alright. Yeaah, it's a very traditional menu for the day, and I'm like, I'm all about it, that'd be cool.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Happy Thanksgiving. No one to fool them. Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Happy Thanksgiving everybody.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, I'll tell you what, uh, that, you never played Dying Light 1, right? No! Simon, uhm, Dying Light 1 had amazing gameplay. The movement, the parkour, the fighting zombies, it's wonderful to play. It's story is kinda crap, and that's kinda what I'm expecting from this, cause we just watched the story trailer. Ugh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nah, you know, from that perspective, like, I'm trying to remember Dying Light one story and I can't, I just remember, okay, you're in a, you're in a city, things are happening, you're two factions, whatever. Dueling factions, yeah. Yeah, and that's the thing, that's, I played it and I don't remember it, that's how just mediocre the first story was. Right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, so I'm kind of expecting that from this, but the gameplay, if it's anything like the first one, the gameplay is going to be great. And it sounds like this developer, they've already told the community they are going to be supporting this game for four years out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wow. So once the game released, they've already said, yeah, we're, hey, this is, we're, we're, we're going to massage this and shit. They were still updating dying light one last year, right? It's like they gave that game some love. So this, this is a quote, like this is a solid developer and their base.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For anybody that hasn't played Dying Light 1, I highly recommend it. And it's a multiplayer too, so uhm, cause yeaah, I played it with three friends, and yeaah, it was...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, all the zombies are running around on the ground, so you try to stay up above them. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Electrical barbed wire knife and you can stab zombies with. Yeaah. Just shit like that where you can build your own weapons and things like that. Wonderful parkour. So yeaah. Super excited about Dying Light 2. Well, I'm, uh, yeaah. You've been talking about it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it was, it did get delayed a couple times, or maybe at least once.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wow. That's why they sent it. It is. That's why, that's why advertising works. It does work. For guys like, uh, guys like Simon who's like, I'm super excited about this. I don't know why I love this goddamn game so much. I hate games, but damn, this one sounds good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yeaah, most zombie movies are crap. But there's a couple of little bright spots in there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, no, yeah, uhm, Dying Light, uhm, if I, yeah, I would say Dying Light is way more action-oriented.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you're not building shit. Seven days. Yeah, you're, you're existing in a world that has a story. Yeah. Like, you know, and, uh, and I don't think this is much crafting. You can craft some weapons, but it doesn't have the go out, loot, bring the stuff back, dig into the world.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, we were playing, yeaah, we were playing it on the easier mode. Because, yeaah, we don't play that much. I wasn't gonna throw you guys into a hard mode.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't remember what we played on, but, I mean, I remember dying several times. So, I mean, yeaah, it, it happens. And we can, uh, you know, we can challenge ourselves, we can put it on a harder difficulty.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, let me double check.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause I recall this. Yea, you're right. Okay. Okay, so yea, there's scavenger, adventurer, nomad, warrior, survivalist, and insane. Oh, there's six things. Six.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wow, okay, so I guess they, they start you on adventure. So yeah, we bumped up to Nomad.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it isn't. Yeah, it's nice. Yeah, it became a logistical thing. Yeah, as we all know. Yeah, because now, now you gotta have five different recording sessions with, you know, the spectator. The spectator has to be watching five different times.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ah, it's a wonder, it's a wonderfully crafted survival game. And the devs have done just a great job. We just keep updating and updating. I mean, how long has it been in alpha now? It's something ridiculous.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Look, when it's done right, uhm, I love it. I love it when a game comes out. Yeah, I mean, like, you know, the Dying Light guy said, I think I said four years, that was wrong. They're gonna, they're gonna nurture that game for five years. Right. So you know, there's gonna be five years worth of extra content or at least, you know, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's, I mean, that's the phase we're in. We've talked about this, you know, ad nauseum, but... Yeah, yeah. Oh, for sure. That, that, that ability...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's called enjoying a game. Welcome, Simon. We've converted you. You're a gamer now. Yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and apparently that port was amazing. I haven't played it yet, but uhm, yeah, apparently the port is like fucking perfect. Which is great to hear nowadays because, you know, half the time you hear like, even with Rockstar, and I think when Red Dead 2 first popped on PC, it had issues. It's like, most of these, most of these big companies, when they port it over to PC, it's just, you know,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It has issues right out of the get-go, because there are, you know, a billion different PC builds out there, so it's hard to kinda go, like, alright, this is gonna work for all of them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, the definitive edition? Like, that's getting fuckin' ripped apart. And it deserves it, but oh man, oh god, do I, do I say this? Yes. Alright.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You may want to blur faces, Simon, but uhm, okay, so the GTA Definitive Edition. This was a mobile gaming company, and they did the mobile ports for like, uh, the original GTA and stuff for Rockstar. Then Rockstar put them in charge of the, uh, you know, the GTA Definitive Edition.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That came out, it was basically the old games with like, kind of an updated lighting engine, but it was buggy, it was buggy as hell, and it wasn't, it wasn't the expectation you have for Rockstar Games, because Rockstar Games is fucking, they're up there. It looked better, but it wasn't like anything


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's like when you think Defendive Edition, like, that's the thing. It wasn't a remake. It was just, okay, we've taken the old games and we've made them shine a little more.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it's the biggest thing in entertainment ever. It's made the most money out of any movie and video game ever. So when you got that amount of money, it's like you expect a certain level of care that goes into your product. But I noticed Grove Street Games, that company that did that port, they had like a picture of their entire staff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I looked at a picture of their staff and on the right, there's a girl.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but I found, uh, yeah, I just found that funny seeing that image. I was like, holy shit, there's, that's a, that's a damn Cooter shirt. Right there. Yeah. So somebody over at this company that made the GTA Definitive Edition likes our stuff, which I, it's cool.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I hope, uhm, they've, uh, the company that did do that, Grove Street games, they did say that they are going to work on updating that and making that better. But yeah, just another example of a game comes out when it's not ready to come out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like, it's like they don't playtest these things and it kind of, it kind of is like, what's going on here? It's like, I know, I know you're developing the game and that's one thing, but like somebody has to go in.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And play the thing, and go, I found this problem, I found this problem, I found this problem, this is an issue people are gonna have.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yea, it's weird. It's like yea, man, you're talking GTA 3, GTA, uh, Vice City, and GTA San Andreas. It's like three games that are beloved by the gaming community. It's like why in the hell wouldn't you put all of your effort into making sure that that is, uh, is as quality as it can be?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It plays very, I played it. It plays very similar to the old games. Uhm, it still is janky. Uhm, they've updated a couple of things, like you can, uh, you have the weapon wheel now, uh, so the way you kinda switch weapons and everything and I feel, uh, they, the driving feels a little better on controller and the graphics look a little better. It's like small things but,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like man, what you think could have been done. Okay. Yeah, it just could have been so much more.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Rockstar's probably gonna go out of business, basically.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How long, what, uh, GTA, man, GTA 5 is almost a decade old now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I was like, man, they're making a killing on GTA Online, and they've kept updating that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, that's kind of the sad reality, you know, I think a lot of, uh, you know, Rockstar is a business, they're a company, they see where the money's at.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, and the money is online and it's in mobile gaming. Shark cards, baby.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh man, it's, it's, uh, you know, I feel like we're lucky gamers, maybe because we understand that business and we, we like, we've discovered really, really good games and you know, we can afford consoles and everything with these wonderful, it's just single player games where you just pay $60 and boom, you got your game. But there's a ton of gamers out there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, on mobile, mobile's the easiest thing because it's your phone. It's a free game that you can download.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, developing these really, really good looking single player games for a smaller market where we could be developing cheaper games and get all this much money from a much larger, larger market. I mean, it makes sense, makes sense business wise, but it does suck for the, uh, for the, for the single player loving gamer like myself.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's another one coming out this year. Got a war, not two, I guess that'll be five.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe, maybe it's hidden somewhere. Maybe, maybe there's a developer over at Santa Monica Studios who watches our stuff and they've hidden a little Easter egg. It's behind a board that you walk by.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I hope that God of War was amazing. Like uhm, they just nailed it with that one. Wow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because I know EF4, cause, you know, they kinda went smaller with it. Like if you play God of War 3, it's so, so fucking epic. It's insane.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, whereas four, they kinda pulled back on just the absurdity of some of the stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, uh, I hope they inject a little bit more of that into this new one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah, yeaah. That's what define the God of War is like, just absurd, just over the top dude action.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, the third one starts with you riding a Titan climbing up Mount Olympus to fight Zeus.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think with God of War 4 because, and this was cool how they situated the camera behind Kratos, and they never cut. Like if you ever watch, you know, you watch the playthrough of God of War 4, but I don't know if you remember, that camera never cuts.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it stays in a position the whole time where it moves either behind the player or moves into a cutscene and around it. Right. Never cuts. And then it comes back to-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know, seriously. They even have like four cuts in Birdman, come on. Yeah. They have, uh, there are magicians working over at Santa Monica Studios, I'll tell you that. It is wonderful.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yeaah, that uh, I hope, I hope that uh, that'll probably get delayed because Jesus Christ, it's probably so big of a game. But, looking forward to that one this year, that's for sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, a friend of mine- I have a PS5. Yeah, a friend of mine got me one. I just need to get it from him. Yeah. Nice.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, okay, so yeaah, you're PS4 busted, and it's like, alright, alright. I gave in, I fucking gave in. I getcha, I getcha, I getcha. Fuck it. Uhm, so it looks like, uh, there is no, God of War is just supposed to be released sometime in 2022, and it will be on PlayStation 5 and on PS4. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, I am excited to get away from the PS4s and the, uh, the Xbox. Like, I think that's what held Battlefield, uh, 2042 back, to be honest. Possibly. They had the, like, yeah, they, they had...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A grand vision and they couldn't execute it, uhm, with the old consoles.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, staying in the past with that technology. Yeah, when you bump it up to that many players, there's just so much more shit going on and it's like, yeah, you could probably get that working great on an Xbox and PS5, but we have to make this game where we'll also run on the PS4 and the old Xbox.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Speaking of Xbox, oh my god, uhm, I mean, we're, we're recording this today on the 18th, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Then they just announced Microsoft purchasing Activision Blizzard. Yep. What was it? 17 billion? It was something stupid. I heard it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh my god. I was way off. Were you? Uh, it was, yeaah, it was nearly 70 billion dollars. Oh my god.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wow. That shows you how much money Activision Blizzard pulls in. 17 or 70. Okay. Across all of their, you know, normal, you know, games and mobile gaming. Holy fuck.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's Activision and Blizzard? Mm. Call of Duty, Sekiro, Tony Hawk's Pro Skater, Crash Bandicoot, uhm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, no, I mean, I, I, you know, yeah, being, being a part of these, uh, deals was, yeah, must be crazy. I mean, yeah, what? They, they bought Minecraft. What was it? It was almost two billion dollars, I believe, they bought Minecraft for. And that was just from a guy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Mmmm. I guess so. Their stock price trades for a little over $300. I know that. But at least right now. Buy Microsoft.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, no, they, uh, they, they are looking at it and they have a plan. They're like, man, we can buy all these franchises and yeah, we'll be able to turn this around and make our 70 billion back easy. Well, I mean, do you think, think about it too, like a Microsoft Game Pass?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which is already pretty good. Like, that's a subscription service. I mean, that's quickly becoming the Netflix for video games. It's like, if you have an Xbox and you can sign up for Microsoft's Game Pass and like, you get new releases, you get old releases, it's like a giant library of video games at your fingertips.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, but you only get two free games a month. If you have Xbox, if you have Xbox, I think it's $15 a month and like Halo, Halo Infinite just came out. You got it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. I mean, so, I mean, they're, they're talking, talking about, they are in a position, uh, they are positioning themselves pretty damn well as far as the console market because they can, they can easily go, you can only get Call of Duty on Xbox.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, no, it's, well, it's also the numbers, people. It's like, you know, hey, you realize, which, you know, guy, I mean, let's, let's really relate it to us. I mean, we were making cartoons back in the day. Um, and it's not lazy, but you look at the numbers and you go, wow, we make, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just the same amount of money, if not more, from producing gameplay videos, and it takes us a quarter of the time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which one should we start doing? Yeah but our videos came out working.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're making this much money doing this, why the fuck are we gonna keep doing that when this is making us, you know, a ton more? Especially the top tier guys, they don't play games, they don't give a fuck about games. Yeah, exactly, the money people. Like, yeah. Oh yeah, no.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They look at gamers as addicts, man. They do. They're like, oh, look, it's fucking addicts. I don't give a shit what they want. I'm gonna party this weekend.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nah, if yea, if you get to the point where you have a subscription service for something like Microsoft Game Pass and


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Their servers are the ones running the game, not your own PC, not the consoles. You can play it from anything. You can play it from a shitty ass laptop. You can play it from a phone. Right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And boom, why wouldn't, why wouldn't you sign up for Microsoft Game Pass where you have access to this entire library?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, we are not sponsored by them. I mean, I don't even have an Xbox. Well, I got one sitting here on the floor. I think it's an old one. But, you know, I do commend them for the business moves they make because it's fucking smart.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think they hold water. The best movie thing Sony did was to let Marvel make a Sony movie. Right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's the best decision they've made is let somebody else do it. Anything they've produced in the past, what, it's like pixels and fucking the Ghostbusters reboot. The new Ghostbusters was pretty good. Still haven't seen it. Enjoy that one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's, I, I put it, it's a, it's right there where The Force Awakens is a soft reboot. It's the same damn story you've heard already. It's like, okay. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Star Wars did the Death Star again. It's like, okay, this is doing gozer again. But it's done in a way that introduces you to new characters and go, alright, now you have a chance to revitalize this franchise and go in your own direction. Yeah. Hopefully they'll do that. Hopefully they'll go in their own direction and they'll do something completely different, whereas just Star Wars just shat the bed. I had a first, go for it, go for it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was pretty good. I think the only part I didn't like, there was a pop song in the middle of it that went on for like 2 minutes. Like why, why are we, why are we listening to this pop song?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When it started, I was like, holy shit, this is a pretty, pretty good way to do a Matrix reboot. I didn't hate it. Like a lot of people are hating it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just, for whatever reason, fell asleep. Yeah, it's right there with the last two, or yeah. So yeah, the Matrix 2 and 3, and now this one. I kind of put them all in the same category. It's like, man, there are moments in these that work for me, but there are more moments that don't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sadly. And especially the action, the action in the new one is weird.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, stunts and well-choreographed fights and it just didn't exist anymore.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I know, but I've been on a, yeah, I've been on a treadmill like that before where they play a video in front of you. It's like you could stop walking, the video just keeps playing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nah, I get that. I don't know, I was just like, wow. 40 bucks a month, that's a steep price.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and really they have a trainer, but I mean, shit, can't it just be like 20 video files of different exercises? I mean, is there a trainer live every day? I don't know if it's live, but I'm sure that they have.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And hey, get it right, you don't call it the oculus quest anymore. Right. It's the meta quest. Oh yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay. Yeah, yeah, Facebook, Facebook, yeah, is rebranded to Meta, and now, yeah, it's the MetaQuest.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, nah, I'm looking at it right now. It's like, oh yeah, this, they've just ripped off Beat Saber.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Supernatural. Supernatural. I tell you what, if you want a game that'll wear your ass out, do, uh, Thrill of the Fight. It's a boxing game. Oh, I have. I have.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well now, I would love to see a snow. This looks like it's gonna be ice and mixed shit. Maybe a little dusting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it was, I flew out of, or flew into and out of, uh, Charlotte yesterday. It was cool flying in, seeing all the snow, and all the roofs, and all the ground. It was pretty, especially at sunset.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, nah, my Key West, my Key West adventure was chill as fuck. Okay. Wonderful. That's good. Yeah, went down there and, uh, just, you know, ate, ate some damn good food.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, there's a really great bar in Key West called the Retro Room.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, I found, I found this last year, but man, I ended up at that place every night. It's way off of Duval.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, there is a Italian joint, uh, way off the beaten path, uh, path called, uh, mangi manji. Which I guess means eat, eat. Yes. An Italian. I think, uh, mangi manji.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Manja manja, but anyway. Yeah, that makes more sense. But manja manja, they have a dish there. It's like a, it's a spinach fettuccine alfredo, um, with lump crab meat on top. It is homemade alfredo sauce and it is out of this damn world.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't do, I don't do a lot of pasta, but god damn, I would do pasta every day. I would do it at that place.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I had bits of fun. Uhm, those missions though, yeaah. There was a couple in there, like that Star Fox one I really enjoyed. Just because it was so different, but yeaah, a lot of them, they were just unnecessary gauntlets.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, Ragnarok was a good map, and that new map they have out now, Lost Island, that's pretty good, but it's, yeah, I think we just need a break. Yeah. We've been playing it so long, and it's been such a staple, but yeah, it's just like, okay, even if we go back to it after a couple months, we just need to step back for a minute.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well it's like seven days, like seven days is great because we stop. And then we get a chance to miss it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and it's like, okay, I can't wait to go back and play that again. It's like, art right now just feels like, oh god, I gotta play this again. And I don't like feeling like that about anything I play.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's an odd, it was so many odd design choices because I really think my favorite looking map is Genesis 2. Yeah, I agree. When I hopped in and saw, wow, we're on this big halo ring. Oh, the diversity and everything. You know, I wish it was a little bit more diverse. I don't think there's a desert biome. I don't think there's a red tree biome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well that's the thing, it's like a lot of these arc maps are designed for PvP. Yep. And we play PvE.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Seek out. Yeah, cities with populated people, you had missions you could go on, and it was laid out and it was like, you know, yeah, the, uh, the, uh, what was it? Your journey or whatever. It's like, this is probably what you should try to do next. Go kill the king of the sewer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But, and, and yeah, Conan did that right by doing that and still managing to be open-ended where you can go wherever you want.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So yeaah, it's like, I want Ark and Conan to have a baby.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well we got some things up in the air right now. I don't see if thieves is also an option. Going back there for a little bit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well, I mean, that's how it's structured. It's structured for these PvP players that are really good, and there's probably a lot of our community that's part of groups that can probably go into these missions and fucking kill it and know exactly what to do. But, you know, we're more of a casual crowd, uh, we don't play games that much, and it's like, yeah, we just get, just, destroyed, and it's not fun. And that's the other thing, it's like, there's no, the missions are one, they're too long,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, that's the thing, yea, we're bouncing around to a bunch of other ones too. But if the missions had some sort of like, reason? Other than like, you gotta beat these missions to do the boss fight. And I know they give you little like, uh, buffs for a minute, it's like, oh beat this mission and you can tame a little faster, who gives a shit?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I can upgrade something. Yeah, there's better ways to design that. I feel like they had big ideas, but their execution was poor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They say 2022. So, uh, it may happen this year, but let's face it, like games get delayed all the time. So there's a good chance it's not until 2023, 2024.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, Small Lands is a, is a little, a title on Steam. Uhm, it's, yeah, it's kinda like Grounded, but kinda like Grounded and Art Mixed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which I understand, it's like a story driven game, but it really did disappoint me when I played it. Because it feels like they're just making Dying Light again. You know, it's like, oh man, this feels like game design from 2013. It's like they haven't progressed at all. It's like, hey guys, Breath of the Wild came out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know if you noticed, but if you're making an open world game now, the breath of the wild came out and showed everyone how to do it. Yeah. So you're a fan? Yeah, I'm a fan. I'm a fan of a game that just drops me into a world that gives me like a little bit of stories like, well, go do this at your leisure. And it just lets me go. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, Dying Light has two hours of opening. Hey, follow me, we gotta go over here. Oh, blah blah blah blah blah. Blah blah blah blah blah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, but that's, that's game. Wanna switch gears? Anybody got anything else on their mind?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah, no, it's just yeaah, it's infuriating. It's infuriating this fucking system we got going on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No yea, you got the chicken parmesan, but you didn't want the pasta with it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right? Yeah, it's one of the, yeah, a lot of these simulator games, uh, yeah, kind of fall like trucking simulator.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I can see that. Yeah. I imagine, the thing about Power Wash Simulator is satisfaction from the game comes from cleaning and I just imagine a person sitting in a shithole playing this game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I tell you what man, the best thing about pressure washer is playing with a gun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pressure washer gun, shootin' up in the air, like, yeaah! Feels so fuckin' cool.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I used to, nah, I used to do it all the time. I had to pressure wash the, uh, uh, the dingy-ass car washer at the McDonald's.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Tell you what, I do like those, uh, I'm sure you guys have seen it, it's a pressure washer, but it looks like a lawnmower. I've not seen it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You knock your fence down. Alright. It's true, yea, you take your fence up, you put it down. Yea, there you go. Then you put it back up. Okay. It's easy. It's easy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you know, yeah, it was, uhm, a buddy of mine recommended it to me, and he, I guess he got it on his phone, and was like, man, this is a good little god game, and I saw it on Steam, and was like, yeah, whatever, I'll check it out. It's great!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're basically, you know, it's, it's pixelated, but you're a god in this world. You can put down people and animals. You can fill the land how you want.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, no, that's what I think that game needs. If, uh, if they keep developing that game, um, I hope they make it where civilizations can advance to the point where they can, you know, go to war and like, you know, fly planes, drop bombs on each other, maybe even make it space, shit like that. Like if they could advance that far, yeah, that'd be, that'd be fun to watch.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, cause right now I think they kinda top out at like medieval just swords and bows and arrows and that's as far as it gets.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's very passive. It's just, okay, here's a world, I would put some shit in it, and you just watch it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I didn't know about that aspect until you told me that earlier today. Like, I was, I thought the game looked good, but I didn't really have any interest in it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know what you played through it. Oh, uhm. Ghost of Tsushima. Tsushima. Ghost of Tsushima. Yeaah. Now that, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well that, well that's a whole separate thing that I was gonna bring up, uh, apparently, I guess whatever they're fucking doing with this metaverse shit, somebody got in and like groped a lady, so now I guess if you're in their, any sort of metaverse or Facebook virtual reality world, like you have a bubble.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, it should have been like day one. What do we expect like the worst part of humanity to do with our technology? Anybody developing a website or anything that wants to attract a large group of people, that's the first thing you gotta ask yourself. How are people going to abuse this? And how can we prevent it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We live in that world, man, I mean, you know, you're waking up every day and you're in this, uh, this bubble really where, you know, you're developing this fucking crazy state of the art technology. Yeah. It's like, you're not probably, yeah, you're not going to talk about like going down to KFC.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Facebook's been losing members. For sure. Now they've peaked.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] People are finally falling off. I haven't used that website in years.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's still good, right? Is it still out there? Yeah. Well, Facebook ruined itself with all the political shit. For sure. It's just like, it got so toxic.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yea, and even Twitter's kind of getting there. And, but you know, that could just be like the algorithms, like that's what it wants to feed everybody. It's like, look at this political shit. You really get engaged, get mad, stay here, stay engaged, stay mad. It's like, okay, I'm out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that's when the days are longer. I know, I can't wait.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This Sunday. This Sunday. Yup. When's this podcast coming? Is this podcast this week? Uhm. It'll be after the Superbowl. Actually, no, it's after the Superbowl. Yeah, so this is after.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What? Yeah, can't imagine seeing a lightning bolt that lasts 17 seconds.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She's not just sneaky or super fast? She's like this big with little tiny legs. Just, it's insane. And Flea can't catch her. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, before we start the podcast, we have a quick announcement. Neves, what you got?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's the best, especially with the way it went with the old COVID numbers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was so worried because the numbers spiked and, uh, for my holiday I went to Florida. Yeaah. And all the news was like ARGH!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yea, I was digging on it. I mean, for the limited time I played it, I was like, oh yea, this is a dumb, fun, cheeky way to...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] First kind of a little bit. I mean, yeah, it is like, yeah, okay, you are, you know, yeah, it is like very much making fun of homeless. It's derogatory towards homeless people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's called Hobo, Tough Life. From what I understand, it's impossible to win. Which I think it's his meta commentary. But uh, yea, that one actually, I think you can play at least two players, so yea, we should check that one out in the future.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeah, no, when you start attaching firecrackers to pigeons and throwing them at people. Come on, who else is doing that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I traumatized my sister one time with birds. We were out on a boat and she was in the water and I was on the boat and I was like eating like a pack of Cheetos. Oh good. And then I just noticed birds on the beach, Cheetos in my hand, sister in the water.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It is, it is. It's a wonderfully designed, fun game, and yeah, I think it's the best Aliens game possibly ever made, even though it's not really an Aliens game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Each character kind of having their own special power. Uhm, yeaah, the uh, the kind of random generated worlds. Yep, it's fun. It's a really, really solid good game. Smart, smart shit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There you go. We could probably go into our, uh, YouTube and like, type in like, don't allow this keyword.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Someone in that room. There's some cool looking rhythm games in there. I mean Beat Saber is obviously at the top when you're talking about rhythm games in VR.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I remember seeing this. Yeah, this does look cool. I mean, I mean, this was just a CG trailer, but uh, yeah, it's uh, that's an intriguing world.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, so yeaah, it's got potential. I hope it's, uh, I hope it's cool. Is there a release date? Let me see.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, right, yeaah. Probably not this year, maybe next.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think that's in, um, Stranded Deep too. If it's raining and you got a fire, it'll put your fire out. Oh does it? Yea. You gotta cover it. Or make a hobo stove. It won't put out a hobo stove.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Meg's been with us for longer. I have more of an attachment to Meg. Absor could probably be steaks. Hmmmm. Yeaah. Absor steaks?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, when you like, uh, burn fire and everything, you can get little charcoal pieces. Oh, that's awesome. And then as like, if you get, uh, if you're out and about somewhere, you go, okay, I want to map this area. You can use that piece of charcoal and it'll draw.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's so easy, yeaah, it must have been so easy to get turned around and lost. Still is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, Neebs, I watched you do that, uh, thing that didn't do, uh, didn't fill the taskbar. But it did. And then I left you. You were close to Medbay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I think you did it because he was talking to you and all of a sudden there's no Nibs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like that people are posting comments like an hour in. Yeah, spring me down, baby. Mmm, it feels good. We're talking about the game, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So what'd everybody get for Christmas? Neebs, you got the belt. Alright, Dora, what'd you get for Christmas?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I do like, I do like some wings. And Pizza Hut does have a nice garlic parmesan sauce.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I went, I went to stay with some friends in Florida and we went to Bush Gardens New Year's Day and, uh, stayed till midnight, watched the fireworks, um, it's pretty neat. Right before the fireworks went off this


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Except for the, uh, firework show. So yeaah, it was eerie.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, we got up, uhm, and went to the Florida Aquarium.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. Yeaah. We had a good ol' time. Good for you. I'm not, I can't do that, but I, I, I usually can't either, but I was like, ah, fuck it, it's New Year's, it's a special day. Uh, my daughter was with me, she turned 13 this year, so I was like, okay, this is your 13th birthday present, so let's spoil your, spoil you a little bit, take you to a theme park, have a good ol' time. We did.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What other products would you guys like to see? Like, I don't know. I'm not a tank touchers. There you go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, so that's true. It sounds like you're more grizzled and grizzled like every day, like, you know, I hate shoe shopping.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They just fit just right, huh? Those were the first jeans ever invented, correct?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, back to shopping for clothes. Like I've got some nice clothes, like suits and button down shirts, and I know where they came from.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're either all capture events or something that somebody sent here. Or the other ones, I just don't know where they came from.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Really? At a, uh, like two old hippies or whatever, it's, I don't know, some, some store. You bumped that while traveling? Yes. That looks like a shirt you would buy at home.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Listen, it doesn't say Nashville or anything on it. It looks like it's got the soft going on. It's got the soft going on. Did you forget to pack clothes when you went? Uh, no, I just needed, uh, I needed a shirt for a performance. For that nerd, uh, NPC.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think he's wearing this exact same outfit. This was the outfit I was wearing at that thing. Look at that!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He needed it for something, he did need it for a show. And it kinda looks, it looks good on me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wonder if I subconsciously did that, like, hey, you know, let me give you a show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We have a lot of artists. Oh, that's very true. In our community, a lot of great ones, and I'd love to see, and a lot of kids, somehow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We actually got sent, speaking of charities, uh, Stand Up to Cancer sent us...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you look on our Instagram story, this was just like two days ago.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm ready. I'm sure you see a lot of our emails and stuff that comes in that you don't handle at all.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is this candy alive? Alive, no. Is it a hard candy?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, we could do several volumes. I mean, like, we could release one, like, during each holiday, like Halloween.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Love it. And they taste pretty fucking good too, man. Hey, speaking of like worms and bugs and shit, I think I told a few of you about this maybe, uhm, I watched a show on fungi, a documentary on fungi, mushrooms and stuff and, uh, so the forest,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There was this one place in the forest where they had termites, and the forest itself knew that it had to defend itself, so a fungi grew.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When the termites would hit this fungi, it would get on them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cut off his arms and legs, and head, and then they both commit suicide.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I have no idea, but the guy who was really into mushrooms and fungi, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They rule the world. And over, I think over three million, and I could be wrong on this number, but it was like 300,000 or three, over three million types of fungi. Um, but the guy who they mainly focused on in this documentary, if there was a lineup of people and you said, and somebody said, Hey,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Point out the guy here who's really interested in mushrooms.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The psychedelic stuff about it, but uhm, but some great information on, you know, what it can do and, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Besides the YouTubes, uh, YouTubes that are available right now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, well here's the problem with that, because last night, I went to ADA's to do VR, and I've officially retired from VR.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It wasn't that bad, but I can feel it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And my mouth getting dry, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The viscosity. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, you get, but I had sickness. Yeah. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But then I was thinking about it, you know, I had a tumor in my head not too long ago.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, probably. Okay. It was, so I know the app store was going to be in it too, so between the two of us, yeah, I think that was- That's fun, so Simon and I have a two


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, I guess, you know, I hit a button, I didn't know what it was gonna do, and I jumped. And I jumped high.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I got a little too close to a ledge and almost fell and I was like, oh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, had I, had I, like, gone off that ledge, I would have really fallen. Like, I wouldn't close my eyes. I'm not that smart of a person, as you all know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're driving through the loops. You're driving. You're driving. Yeah. One of the first games that we had when we got the Oculus was a driving game. And when you looked in the, in the side mirror, uh, you're a dog. So you're a good boy. I'm a Greyhound.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Put that on your head. So damn heavy? Yeaah. He did have that big ol' fuckin' header on too. Or some elephant tusk. That probably, yeaah, it's not my favorite.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey, you get hungry when you study? Have a fuddy duddy, it's nutty!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know what would really kill it? Uh, get paid to play. That would kill it, yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It is GTA. Yeah, absolutely. We didn't even know we were being duped. Yeah. What? Motherfuckers? But if you could- But if it's free! What if you could exchange your game money for- What if Amazon had games? They do. Well now you're describing- You make Amazon bucks.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You gotta cut the friction down. In game, I do a heist, I make some mana, and then I pull up my game phone and I go, okay, I want some, some Nikes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now we're funny daddy not being healthy like it's fake peanut butter paste. What? Or something. What? I'm just saying. A funny daddy? I don't need too many of those.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But some, there's a few names though where you're like, you're expecting something. If it was called, come to Hitler. Whatever. Looking for a certain look. Kind of expect to see a little mustache. Exactly. I see nobody.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Last night I was thinking about how weird it is that people are famous in different countries. Cause some countries are little.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Actually, what caused this thought was, I was, I heard like a loud noise outside. And I was like, is my dog gonna freak out? I think it was a firework. So I was like, let me just hit play on YouTube and something. And it was like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One of those audition music singing shows with the chairs that turn around. The voice or something. But they have those all over the world.


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[Assistant] Get this! Get this! Other countries! I saw-


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[Assistant] But to me, it's kinda surreal to see three or four seats of people that you've never seen, and they're like crazy famous in their country.


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[Assistant] It's just weird to me. I know it's a thing, but it's still, when you see four people and you never even heard of them and you go, man, I bet they sell out a coliseum.


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[Assistant] Now that's hilarious too. If you watch Eurovision, like every American goes,


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[Assistant] Okay, so they've just hired some actors that act like pop stars.


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[Assistant] I remember thinking, she said one sentence in each language. I could probably do that. She did a lot more than that.


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[Assistant] When I see, when I see four or five people and you just think, man, I don't even know any of them. Of course I know I don't. I'm just saying it's kind of funny when you look at it, you're just like, yeah, I get it. They have famous people, but part of you goes, it's funny that you don't know them.


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[Assistant] Hit me, hit me with three names. One of them's a famous athlete, and I'll try to guess which one's the famous one. Okay. Hit me. Oh. Who's, who's hitting you? Do you want to do it? Well, I don't know any famous athletes, so it should probably be Thicke. I'll bet you do.


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[Assistant] Give us a football one now. Oh, do a football one. Football edition.


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[Assistant] I kinda want it to be the ferret one. I want it to be farming bud.


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[Assistant] Yeah, he was a track and field guy. Good for you. Now listen, I can name a lot of names from the past, especially when Jordan was big and there was like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now who do you think is a better actor? LeBron James or Shaquille O'Neal? Okay, Shaquille O'Neal. Oh, Jordan too. Yea, you're third Jordan.


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[Assistant] Now listen, this makes me think about, I actually went to the movies of the day and Anthony went with me. And we saw a date, ooh. Is it Wrath of Man or Man of Wrath? I have no idea. Oh god, I don't remember. Wrath of the Man, I think. Wrath of the Man. Jason Statham.


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[Assistant] Uh huh. Okay. Listen, there's not much to pick from at the movies. I wanted to see nobody. But, uh, my brother-in-law had already seen it. Okay. So, here's my theory. Okay. This movie wasn't supposed to be at the theaters.


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[Assistant] I think the theaters were like, we need movies, and they're like, well we made one, if you want to put it up there. We made this one real cheap. Boy, it's, I mean, pretty bad. There's some stuff where you think it's like the tryout, like you know how they send the videotape in, like this is my audition tape. Like some of it feels like that in the scene.


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[Assistant] I mean, I didn't, I didn't hate it, but you're, you're kind of laughing sometimes cause you're just like, is every character in this movie that I'm a tough guy? Did it have a tough girl?


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[Assistant] I guess because it's another movie where they drop the script and the scenes are out of order a little bit. Okay, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know who else is in it? I think Clint Eastwood's son. Okay. Old Bobby Eastwood. Jimmy Eastwood. Biff Eastwood. Eastwood. Clint Jr.


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[Assistant] There you go, I didn't even know he had a kid. It's good. Oh, is this Anthony?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'll bet he played an entirely different character too. Right? Yea. Nah, he, uh, he played a cockney, uh, British guy with a mission. Oh, he had a mission.


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[Assistant] It's just gotta look good, give him a ponytail. I like a lot of Statham movies. I like him, he's fine, he's got some good presence. But the movie is not wonderful. But it's, hey, if you've already seen Nobody, go check it out. It's no Bumblebee.


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[Assistant] Well, I'd already seen the week before we saw, uh, Raya and the Last Dragon. How was that? That was fun.


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[Assistant] Me and my daughters. Well that's gonna affect the decision greatly. Cause there's...


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[Assistant] You got two young daughters. They're not going to enjoy something out in the desert. Nothing around. Caves though, maybe like that kind of an angle, like stuff like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It depends on your daughters though, like if they like malls and stuff like that, or uh, you know, civilization, you know, and national parks aren't their thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'll tell you this, I've been, I've been to Chattanooga, they got a place called Ruby Falls. It's like, uh, it's actually, uh, I guess a waterfall inside of a cave. But listen, caves, I've been, I've been to caves all over the world. They're the same pretty much. You might find a different mineral.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Whether you're in, uh, Mammoth Caves or Ginolan Caves or Ruby Falls, it's, it's, it's rocks. You're in a dark rocky place.


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[Assistant] In a box. In a box of rocks. In a box of rocks. On a train, in a plane. Uhm, listen, yeah, Riverwalk, they got there, they got the Alamo, they got some.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah. If you didn't hear, uh,


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[Assistant] The uh, which pipeline was it? Colonial pipeline. Colonial pipeline. We had issues. Our state definitely gas short. People freaking out. We got smacked, sure. Way before they should have freaked out. Yeah, we've said it before. If everyone would have acted normal, it would have been fine. People with three quarters of a tank.


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[Assistant] Gassing up, bringing gas cans, like come on. We know how it works though now. If you're out of gas, get gas. If you're not, give it a couple days.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anyway, yeah, I was supposed to have a trip and we're like, eh, people are freaking out. Let's just cancel our trip. No need for us to be, cause we were going to drive to Florida. We were going to go to St. Augustine. So we'll do that later. Yeah, reschedule. Yeah, you will.


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[Assistant] That seems unsafe. That's like when the president and the vice president fly together.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, we had a really long record day, we crammed some extra shows into one day, got ready for it. Yep.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And the state of emergency was supposed to help in ways of, uh, loosening up restrictions, like, hey, now a truck driver can drive 40 hours without sleeping. Right. Exactly. And haul gas. Yes. Or whatever.


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[Assistant] So anyway, now, I think we have, I think there's some shortages, but there's gas out there. Oh yes.


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[Assistant] It's the first time having the electric car was like, wow, there could not be gas for a month and I'd be alright.


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[Assistant] Well, no, it was a situation. I was like, uh, you know, I don't drive much. I could probably go a month on a gas tank. On a gas tank? I know what you mean.


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[Assistant] Here he is. But, uh, but yeah, no, I'm not getting one right now. I don't like to buy new cars.


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[Assistant] Yeah, we can tell. Everybody knows. Like I think when there's a used electric car, I'll probably grab it.


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[Assistant] I know Jack, when I was, I saw some of that electric car conference that was going on, and they had all the, like, all the Ford trucks in the background, and I'm looking at some of these cars like, why aren't they just remaking some of these classic cars? Cause they, cause they made beautiful cars back, like 50's and stuff like that.


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[Assistant] But why couldn't you just make like a Mazda 3 that looks like a 57 Chevy?


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[Assistant] That's a different brand. Like, well that's way too big. But you just need like, look, just, we got this generic motor, and generic whatever, let's just make the body look cool.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, balls aren't expensive. That's all a ball is, is a curve. Oh boy.


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[Assistant] It's a movie. It's a movie. I don't remember which one you're talking about. That motorcycle, they got like a ring around them and it balances and they're in the middle and the whole wheel's spinning around them and they're in the middle of the wheel. I don't think I saw this Men in Black movie. Which one was it? I don't remember. You had to have. Two? Three? How many are there? I don't know. I've only seen one. Three originals and then like a remake.


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[Assistant] But, but when the wheel's in front of you... Alright, I gotta go back and think about this.


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[Assistant] There are aliens, no one cares. No one cares, I know.


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[Assistant] Alright, cool. I mean, SpaceX could make this thing, right? I don't know, I don't think so. SpaceX? No. Yeaah. It's probably something made by a private citizen. I mean, you've seen the rock, the rockets, they land, they got rockets. Yeaah, but have you heard the speed?


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[Assistant] Yeah, but a rocket can go hypersonic. They're just talking about hypersonic, right?


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[Assistant] They help people react. Could you build? I'm not saying it's not aliens. It could be.


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[Assistant] But uhm, if you built an upside down pyramid with all these rocket thrusters and you don't need a payload, you don't need drivers, couldn't you, don't you think SpaceX could do something they could bolt around pretty quickly and then plunge into the water quickly? Maybe? I just don't think it'll compare to what they're doing.


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[Assistant] Well, we've had enough crazy for, like, I don't want anything else crazy in my life.


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[Assistant] Oh, things are gonna get crazier, I think. I don't need to, I don't need there to be aliens in my life.


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[Assistant] Yeah, they've been working on this one a while. It's so pretty. It looks good. It looks really nice. It looks really good, yeah. I still think the forest is one of the best co-op survival games that implemented a story better than any other survival game I've seen.


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[Assistant] I think that's what the forest did better than any other survival game. Like, you know, you think of something like Ark. Ark doesn't have a story, it's just these little boxes you can find. Seven Days doesn't have a story, doesn't need one.


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[Assistant] The forest had a plot that you could follow with friends in a survival environment. It's like this is interesting.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's like you got Timmy back and there's something wrong with Timmy. Yeah. Old Timmy. Yeah, little Timmy that we found. Timmy, Timmy, Timmy wasn't good.


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[Assistant] Uhm, it depends on which version you chose. If you chose a version where, like, let's take Timmy home, it's like, yea, you go to a game show or a new show, and they're talking about the incident, and then Timmy starts to freak out. It's like he has, like, a forest monster in him or something.


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[Assistant] I don't know if you guys remember the whole plot of the forest and spoiler alert for anybody that hasn't played it, I recommend you play it. This will be real quick. Skip to this time if you need to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The plot was like, uh, somebody had crashed a plane on the forest in order to harvest children to bring back another kid. So they sacrifice your kid to bring back the other kid and then you realize that and you take your kid and you bring your kid back to life and kill the other kid. Kid swaps.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's the other thing in The Forested Well is the AI, uhm, where they didn't, they won't, like, attack you immediately, the mutants or whatever, they'll hang back, they'll observe you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and it looks like they're expanding on that in this, like we saw in the trailer, there's a moment where I guess he has the head of one of them and he's showing them to the other AI like, hey, this is what I can do, you know, set up effigies to keep them away, stuff like that, it's pretty cool.


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[Assistant] Right, yeaah, we're gonna forget this after a week. We'll be mindful of this, that we need like a little plushie, a little podcast plushie that we can like toss around. Oh, the talking plushie? You hold the plushie, you get to talk.


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[Assistant] Plushies? Yeaah. Don't we have some art turds in the back? We do. Yeaah. Whoever has the turd.


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[Assistant] Yeah, got to see that crowd, go to Morehead City, eat some good ass food, some good ass TURKEY!


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[Assistant] You need a hoodie like what my buddy got me. It's a hoodie that you can transform into a little backpack.


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[Assistant] That's the worst when traffic comes to a stop for no apparent reason.


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[Assistant] No, that's some great videos on YouTube about that. Just traffic patterns. Oh yeah, one vehicle stops and just causes a cascade. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe one day the robots will be driving the cars. We won't have any of that shit. I'm ready.


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[Assistant] What, who was telling me, was it you? Dora that was telling me they made those robots they could reproduce?


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[Assistant] It says, made from frog cells, the computer-designed organism created by a U.S. team gathers single cells inside a Pac-Man-shaped mouth and release babies that look and move like their parents. Wow. Okay, okay, so I thought, alright.


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[Assistant] Yeah, alright, so these xenobots can gather hundreds of single cells, compress them, and assemble them into babies, released from their Pac-Man shaped mouths. A few days later, these babies become new xenobots that look and move just like their parents, and then these new xenobots can go out, find cells, and build copies of themselves as well.


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[Assistant] Well the the theory is uhm, you're playing as Timmy in this one. Yeaah. And it's Timmy and his friends and so this guy might have been the guy from the first one. Exactly.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not yet. I would imagine four player co-op. Or wait, was the last one five? Or four? I feel like it was less.


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[Assistant] Eight? Yeah. In my head I was like, I thought we were all there at the very end. Yeah, we were. Yeah. Eight. So, eight, then that's the first one, so maybe the new one will have eight players. That'd be sweet. Who might have room for that?


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[Assistant] The shot at the end was the only shot that was like, okay, that's a CG animated thing with the babies. Get down, son. Like, okay, that looks like it's computer animation.


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[Assistant] It seemed like it, but I can't really tell. No, I'm excited. Cause that first one, again, I loved the first one. And the date was? May, I believe? I'll double check.


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[Assistant] But they operate out of one of the government buildings, right? The Thalian Hall? Oh, you mean how they operate?


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[Assistant] Oh yea, no, that's such a gamble. Especially for something we do, like we need a lot of computers. Gaming and Rain. Gaming and Rain.


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[Assistant] That's the, that's the one, that's why they're worried about it. Uhm, it, from what I've heard it's not as, you know, people aren't getting as sick with it, but who knows.


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[Assistant] Whatever it is, it's spreading quick. That's why they're concerned about it.


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[Assistant] It's supposed to be such a happy place. You're gonna have a good time fighting that Epcot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you're probably right. But the last one that was reported, at least that I found, was on July 6th, 2019. A fight broke out among four people in Mickey's Toontown.


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[Assistant] Ready for it to be over. The old crimbo. Nah, I'm excited. I'm going to Tampa for New Years this year.


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[Assistant] We're gonna deaden it a little bit, we're gonna get better microphones, our streams should be sounding pretty good hopefully in a couple of weeks.


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[Assistant] What was fun about that was like, it was super, it was super simple to play games together, but you didn't miss that, uh, being in the same room interaction. That's so weird. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. And if you're listening and you're curious, well, just find a podcast on YouTube. Yeah.


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[Assistant] Like in Raft, at least, you could be a man or a woman, and then you could put a hat on.


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[Assistant] Absolutely. Yeaah. I mean, it's nice to have for sure. Alright, so everybody tell Volcanoids, get on it. Get on that character customization. That's where we're waiting on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kind of reminds me of Forest a little bit, cause Forest was four, right? Yes, Forest was, yea. And also, uh, I was with you, we did some tests to see if you could kind of get spectator shots, and you can break from your player for a minute.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that's what we had to do in Forest. Like if one of us wasn't in the action, we'd kind of break back and get some shots.


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[Assistant] There's gonna be, I can already see the comments. There's gonna be a lot of upset people. About what?


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[Assistant] They're almost gonna like, want a regular season, and an alone season.


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[Assistant] I'm ready to go back in. I wouldn't do simultaneous. That gets confusing. It's like, wait, which one am I seeing now?


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[Assistant] We bought, uh, so we're, we're working on our office a bit. Little renovation, yeaah. And we have these wind screens, they like have little, like, stretchy arms, what do you call them? Bendy arms? Mhm. And then the wind screens in front of the mic usually. So we're like, hey, why don't we just get these, like, you know, little stretchy socks you put over it? Kinda like, you know, foam.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do y'all wanna hear about the letter I got from the DMV? Yep, you got a letter from the DMV. The Department of Motor Vehicle.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, they love me. Uhm, so I get this letter. In our state, you get a letter once a year saying, hey, you need to go get your car inspected and get your registration renewed. Yup.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm reading mine, and it's got big red letters that say, inspection not necessary. Or something like that. And I'm like, what? What kind of sense does this make? And I'm like, this is a trap.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] DMV is trying to trap me. I went to the place, and I said, what's this all about? They're like, man, your car's so, oh they don't even, after a certain time they just stop inspecting it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She gets to go first. It was funny, cause there was another guy, I felt bad for him, but it was a few people back, and he asked the guy that was supposed to be next, hey man, would you mind if I went in front of you too, cause I'm super late, and he's like, man, if you were a 90 year old lady, I would. My truck's a 90 year old lady.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well here's the classic car thing, cause they used to send me a letter every year like, hey, is this a collectible? Cause we might want to charge you more taxes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, his car is taken care of. It needs a little body work.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But people wanna buy my truck all the time, you wouldn't believe it. I'm sure. Really? I'm sure they do. I go through a drive-thru? Man. Or they offer you 500? They don't give a price. Oh. I'd love to hear it. But they wanna buy it though.


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[Assistant] Most of them aren't hauling that crazy amount of stuff.


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[Assistant] But if this, if this thing where it'll power your house for three days is true, anybody.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Of course you're gonna see shit like that. Yeaah. I don't think these cars are gonna catch on. Nothing like a good horse.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Jiggle them nuts a little, Tommy. I can put solid black tin on him. Doesn't have to get tested.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm sure they were. Got a lot of love. I would love for that to be not an issue. I know it's legal here, but I'm sure, very much sure it's not. But with the drinking though, did you check? You probably didn't check.


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[Assistant] Some you don't see every day, yeah. What are they doing here? It's so weird, isn't it? Like, just a hundred years ago, everybody had a horse. I know. And now it's like, oh look at that, there's a car outside. It's exotic, yeah. Yeah, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not like a, like a full size, like model T4.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You gotta pick the gear. Oh really? That's your gear. That's your gear for life. I'm gonna be going fast today. I'm gonna put it in third. I'm going fifth. Did you have one of those?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Have you ever heard it called straight drive? Straight drive? Yea. A stick? That might have just been where I grew up. Straight drive. Hey, you drive straight drive? Yea, no, never heard it called that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. He sent me a picture of a blue fire hydrant this morning. Okay. He said, look at this, look what I found. And that's high content, right? We were streaming last Thursday, I'll get back to the Anthony story in a second. Okay. We were streaming last Thursday and someone thick probably asked me, hey, what do these different colored, uh, hydrants mean? I'm like, I don't know. I was like, is it just cause, uh, they


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe you want a yellow to look prettier in a certain neighborhood? This is like PSI stuff!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or gallons per minute? Yea, GPM. GPM. Like a red, a red fire hydrant is like your standard neighborhood


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Um, this sounds irrelevant now or unrelated, but we were talking about calling things weird names like straight drive. Right. So we were all, we all went out to a rebellion a few weeks ago. Yep. And, uh, had dinner, had some beers. Anyway, Anthony gave me a ride home.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And on the way home we saw a bunch of, you know, lights.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Lights. Emergency lights. Okay. Yes, yeaah. And uh, I'm like, oh look, there's uh, two cops and a wrecker. What's going on there? And he's like, wrecker? What's his...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No one's ever heard of Wrecker? Is that a tow truck? I have a tow truck. I would call it a tow truck.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think I've heard that before. That's a tow truck. Well, everybody in the car at that time was like, nope. Not so much. And I was like, is that a thing where I grew up, or is that? And I was like, no, wait, record service.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] $13 on a breakfast. Your average. Average, yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now listen, if you spent $15 every time you went, let's just say that, you went twice a week, that would cost you $1,560 for the first year. You could have done $2,000 and still come out ahead in a year and a half.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That happens. Like the girl, she could say shut up and everything froze.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What is it? The prostitution thing? I can't wait to tell her. Uhm, so we got a friend that I call Junior. Uhm, but that's what I call a U-turn. She made so many U-turns when we go on a road trip.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, that was what's-her-name, the paramedic. Oh, Leslie's. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We went camping, she had a nice Tacoma. I'd love to have a Tacoma like that. Till Meade got a hold of it. Yea, no, it was like, we're at a lake campground, so everything's kind of steep, you know, cause the land is going steep towards the lake.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So there's a paved road that kind of goes through this campground, but you can tell the, the land's kind of eroding underneath the side of the road. Right. And it's just a drop off. And yeah, I got too close and one of the wheels just went off and you get the axles just sitting on the side of the asphalt. But now we've got to figure out a way to get this thing back. You guys did it. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Best it was me, best it was me who did it. I couldn't believe you in this car, cause that's not what I remember. I mean, that happened too, but the first memory I have of that protege was, we used to train on the weekends with local stunt people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And we discovered a few new things. And yeah, wow. It looks great. It's so different. It's so different. So gorgeous.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, so just that one race. Yeah, I just clicked on my guy. I was just like bleep. And it's like, you get 300 hexagons.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I don't know if we touched on this already but if you die, you come back with a suit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I didn't see the trash bar. He talks a lot of trash though. He, he said about one fighter who got COVID, he was like, uh, look, you gotta be tougher than that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kevin Holland, he, yeaah, he's a falling star. Cause he has potential. He's actually...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Training place in town. My daughter trains there. She was like really reluctant to go yesterday. Okay. And she, she does the Muay Thai and kickboxing and I was like, God, this, this girl's lazy as shit. I just, your daughter, she, yeah, she's lazy, but she gets in there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And her punches have gotten so much faster and so much stronger. For just a little noodle girl, because she looks like a noodle with hair.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She has a freakishly strong punch and I'm like, man, if you can, if you can like channel that energy, channel some sort of energy, all the energy that you use to watch fucking anime to be a fighter, you can be something kid. Does she want to be a fighter? No.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But she likes, once she's, once she's actually there and she's doing stuff, she's like, oh yeah, I had so much fun. But like going there, she's like, ahhh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I saw the newest Suicide Squad.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which I was actually entertained. I went into it with very low expectations based on the last one, but was it James Gunn that did this one?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And uh, and I was very, I was very entertained. That's all I want from a Suicide Squad movie to go like, that was fun. Even though there's a lot of characters, it's not a lot of characters. Okay, I like his decision.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He, he didn't, he doesn't know shit. Okay, that's fine. Because Idris Elba's character's name was Bloodsport. Okay. Different, different than Will Smith. Coumete. So first off, your brother's racist. Okay. Second, he's dumb.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, second movie I saw was Jungle Cruise. Oh boy. I went into that with no expectations. I was, I was entertained. I assumed it was mine. What'd you think?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what it's based on. I must have not gone on that ride because I leaned over to my daughter. I was like, I bet they're going to make a ride out of this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was a good time. Now when was the last time anyone here has been to a Hooters?


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[Assistant] The last experience that, like, back in the day


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[Assistant] They're, maybe my standards have changed? I don't know, but back in the day, like, the Hooters girls were like, really good looking, and now, like, they're like, we don't care if you have tits or not. Just, they're a little bit more inclusive.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Equally as impressive. Oh yeaah. And uh, medicated kilt.


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[Assistant] They have a really good black bean burger at the Cape Fear Hospital. I was, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they had a really good black bean burger, so like yea, a lot of the black bean burgers that I've had have been pretty damn good.


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[Assistant] Now, it wasn't one of those, uh, coast guard or planes that carry water and put it on fire.


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[Assistant] Gotta sing character. Everybody have a good time now. Fucking tazy if you don't.


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[Assistant] Keep your hands where I can see em! Stick em up, motherfucker!


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[Assistant] I don't know if that's a big deal for me personally.


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[Assistant] I'm curious if we're going to get over tornadoed, you know? I'm already curious if it's like, oh my god.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah. A robot dog. A robot dog, we can definitely talk about robot.


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[Assistant] This is a slightly off topic, but I find it entertaining. I think I brought it up before, but one of those Boston Dynamics spot robot dogs.


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[Assistant] The ones that we see, the ones that are like, you know, you can buy your very own one for $74,500. Just FYI.


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[Assistant] You could have that robot dog walk your real dog.


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[Assistant] Oh my god, okay. That'd be fun to see. Alright, I'm reconsidering. Now you're in.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, just stop with your dumb- just stop. Stop. You don't feel it physically. It's a pretty- Don't talk about my opinion. I'm just saying you don't feel it because you're in a video game. Yeaah. It's just a cool another setting. You don't have to hate it. Like, it's weird.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It'd be fun to roll around with a full on 64 person posse, like all bouncing like around collectively. That'd be impressive.


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[Assistant] You know what I hate so much right now is that we did see a good bit of stuff and we can only talk about a certain amount of it and it's like, it's remembering what we can and it's most of it that I think we can't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Robot cats. No robot cats. I didn't see- Nope, I didn't see any zombies. No zombies. I didn't see Gary Busey anywhere. Dinosaurs, there were no dinosaurs in what we saw.


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[Assistant] Yeah, Gary Busey. I might, I thought I was him for a second, but no, it was not. No, it wasn't. I didn't see any cheese.


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[Assistant] We could say this, like for what we did see outside, like beyond the trailer?


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[Assistant] Uh, I think we're all collectively excited about.


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[Assistant] Buying a robot dog right now. Yeaah, the great communicator.


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[Assistant] The trailer, like when do they put out the launch date? Uh, to everyone.


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[Assistant] They just constantly will not shut the fuck up. Like, kind of like, uhm, uh, what was the- Damn it, damn it. What's, uh, what's the damn destiny? You know? Yeah, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yea, definitely was it. Peter Dinklage wouldn't shut the fuck up in that game? Yea, and then they got someone else who wouldn't shut the fuck up, but either way it's a good concern.


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[Assistant] You gotta fast forward straight to Vin Diesel, don't you?


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[Assistant] Oh, it's Vin. Come on. I like those big faces that were in, uh, like when you're walking down that path toward the end or whatever and they're just all telling you how you're not gonna go.


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[Assistant] Maybe make the longest title we've ever had. That might be an angle. Which Dr. Who is your favorite? Just put them all down. I heard that's how they're monetizing and the longer titles are doing better.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like that chocolate fountain. Thicc, this is where you, this is where you slip a Mahundi and you're like, hey,


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[Assistant] Who's that? Waffle House. Oh, I'm not going there. They do, they do. Now, I've got the opposite of Texas toast in my, uh, cupboard right now.


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[Assistant] Who sliced these? They're fucking geniuses! Alright, no more bread. Sorry to bring up the bread. Well, I mean, I love bread, but can't fill up on it.


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[Assistant] Tater tots fat? No, no, no. Yeaah. That's different as well.


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[Assistant] Yes! Yeah, that was nice. I almost forgot about it already. It's crazy.


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[Assistant] We were golfing. Yep, we got together and played some golf. That's right. Uhm, I mean, I played horribly. Uh, for sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe a touch better. Maybe. I don't know.


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[Assistant] Yeaah. How about this? That'd be great. Do you wanna go golfing with us last Monday?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, uh, I'll tell you this new thing that's in golf carts now and it may have been for a few years. It was the first time I saw it. These monitors that are up top.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That give you all the info and you can use it as a scorecard, all this shit.


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[Assistant] But on the first hole, I drove it a little too far on the fairway and I didn't feel like I was super close to the green.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And all of a sudden it was like meh, you know, it shut off the golf cart.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I was like, well, I can't get out of here. I've turned it into reverse, like put it in reverse and I did get out, but...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, uh, so it's, I was like, okay, this is a little bossy. This is a little bossy little bitch, isn't it? So we're, we're playing, we only did nine, and we're getting, I think it was like whole seven.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it gives the, uh, the alert like you, uh, you're about 22 minutes behind. You should probably pick up your pace and like shut the fuck up. There's nobody behind us. You can't see anybody behind us or in front, like shut up. I will tell you something cool. I don't care for that at all.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, well that's, that didn't stop it from hounding us.


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[Assistant] There's no reason for it. It takes up a lot of damn space. It does. It's intrusive.


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[Assistant] Unless you don't have arms. I'm confused as to what the conversation is about right now, to be honest.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A lot of people are wired that way. Very competitive by nature and, uh, I've always, I've never been wired that way and, and like, we've got a good friend, uh, Niebz used to live with him. Uhm, very competitive. And he, uh, I just love fucking with him. I really enjoy fucking with him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause you'll see competitive people get mad when they're like partners saying cornhole shanks a shot or something like, someone wired like that will be openly mad and show it about their partner fucking up. And that's a different level of competitiveness.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like our only chance to get good footage is when the other people don't know the game yet either. Then we kind of get lucky here and there. When I went to, was thick, I think the last time we probably went to Sweden.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I didn't have anything usable. I was, just like Neebs was saying, like, it was one of those events, I was like, fuck me, like, all the way out here. I got nothing. I was just owned, so disappointed in myself, for sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Let's keep capturing. That was pretty fun. I remember exactly what map we were on when they left too. Remember that? It was like that mansion? Yeaah. Oh yeaah. Night time Hollywood Hills or something? Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like it's going to be a regular part of uh, choices from here on, but that's my opinion.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, they've had so much success. Oh, without a doubt, man. They knocked it out of the park with how they came out with that. That's great though. It's great for the whole market because you gotta up your fucking game, right? That's right.