[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, I'm not thinking about me or how, you know, looking ahead, you know, I'm downward looking, going, okay, I gotta feed them, I gotta get clothes, we gotta be here, we gotta go there. And I was probably 28 then when I had some health issues and it's like, okay, what do I really want to do? What do I want to be when I grow up? And that's when I,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I loved flying and I was like, you know what? I'm going back to school to be a pilot.


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[Assistant] Well, it went really well until I fell and injured my back and couldn't pass my first class medical. Uhm, and again, that was...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean for my kids, they've already been through so much and now I'm gonna fly the friendly skies and someone else is gonna raise them when I'm gone. And of course, I had fed myself the lies of it's not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think part of it, you know, I was so tired at that point of trying to maintain and do this all by myself that it was kind of like, okay, that's my little escape.


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[Assistant] And, you know, accepted Christ as a child, but we didn't live it in our home. That wasn't taught to us with church on Sunday, but that was about it.


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[Assistant] But for me that was when I completely surrendered my life. I had made a mess of my life. I had fought God.


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[Assistant] You know, I thought he wanted to make me into this mamzy, pamzy, wimpy, you know, have no backbone. I'm like, mm, I ain't going there. And.


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[Assistant] And they didn't know if I'd walk again and like the only place I could look was up. I'm like, oh.


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[Assistant] I've made a mess of my life, it's not much, but what I've got, I'm laying at your feet, you take it.


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[Assistant] And I'm not gonna pass go. I'm not gonna collect $200. I will stay here and not get in trouble anymore. Just put me on the shelf. I got it. Thank you for your forgiveness of all you've done in my life. And, uh, that was, you know, the point that he said.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I made you the way you are. Why would I want to make you a mamsy-pamsy wimpy?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, but I didn't understand who he was. So for me, that was the major turning point in my life, where, you know, I started reading my Bible every day, learning who he is, studying, you know, his character.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, you know, for me, no doubt, that was the strength, how I got through, you know, losing mark and continued to every single day. But yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, you know, he was the wage earner for the family. He was a long-haul trucker. And so at that point, you know, we'd had some major problems with one of our kiddos and I was like, I just need to focus on them. They've been through so much. You know, they've got to have some stability.


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[Assistant] You know, and, and he struggled and, and felt like because he wasn't the little man anymore, he wasn't loved. And so, oh man, we had some.


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[Assistant] Crazy stuff, you know, that we had to work through. And so at that time, you know, I really tried to focus on being a better mom, helping them and supporting them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Then we moved to Oregon, uh, my mom had a preschool and kindergarten there and so, you know, I started working with her. I've always loved kids. And, uh, she basically did kindergarten, first grade and second grade. So private Christian school at the beginning ages. And I started a preschool program for her there and then eventually ended up purchasing the school from her. And that's where, you know, my mission was, was these kids and loving on them and, you know, helping their parent, parents raise them and be the best they can, you know,


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[Assistant] When the parents couldn't be there, I still 100% believe if parents have the opportunity to be home with your kids, I know a lot of them can't.


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[Assistant] But make that sacrifice for, you know, one of those parents to be there, because I think they turn out so, you know, so different. And people are like, oh yeaah, I'll be there in the beginning years, I'll stay home. They need you the teen years just as much as they do in the beginning. But I understand, excuse me, not everybody has the, you know, ability to be able to do that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] First four years maybe in the marriage and then started seeing some real issues. You know, there was unfaithfulness on his part. Uhm, and then he ended up taking his life 28 years ago, so.


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[Assistant] Again, a lot, and like I said, I never tell all this all at once, but you think back through it and you're like, oh my gosh, how did any of us, you know, turn out?


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[Assistant] But again, that was the healing that God's provided in my life and letting me know.


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[Assistant] And not, it's a growing process. I mean, none of us become a super saint overnight. And you know, I'm sure there are still things that I had done or still do today that he's like,


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[Assistant] Deborah Sue, what the heck are you doing? You know, really? But uhm,


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[Assistant] I don't ever want to do anything purposely that would grieve him or


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[Assistant] You know, and not that there aren't times, like I said, that I'm sure I disappoint him. I'm not perfect by any means, trust me. Ask my kids, they'll tell you. But uhm, that was the major turning point in my life.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I saw him get me through losing my husband. Like I said, it wasn't.


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[Assistant] Perfect marriage? Uh, not that there is a perfect marriage, but we'd been married for eight years. You know, there are issues there. Not that I wanted the guy dead, but you know.


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[Assistant] I think it was definitely Mark of the kids that that was the roughest to go through.


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[Assistant] I had been homeschooling my children and at that point I'm like, I can't, I can't do this anymore. Going through the grief, you know, running the preschool and kindergarten.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Trying to homeschool is just too much. So we put him in the Christian school.


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[Assistant] And he came to me one day and said, Mom, could you please homeschool me again? And...


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[Assistant] My kids when they were homeschooled were always like, oh my goodness, we just got a skull.


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[Assistant] But I think now they look back and see the blessings and the life lessons that you learn in the midst of that. I don't think homeschooling is for everybody, you know, but I think that that was a blessing. And so it was Mark's cry to say, I just want to, I just want to be home with you, mom. I want to be where it's safe.


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[Assistant] I did and we were, we never had much money growing up, so that wasn't an option.


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[Assistant] They didn't have, like you can today, you know, you can sign up for online and you have teachers that instruct online.


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[Assistant] Uhm, I tried to pick topics for them that, you know, Mark back then loved aviation. I'm like, awesome, that's my background. So I would make, you know, the spelling, the English, everything, you know, math, you know, let's figure out how much, you know, gallons of fuel you're going to need for, and make it relatable and, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, you know, that made it easier to teach. My daughter kind of self taught herself.


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[Assistant] You know, she would say, okay, by the end of the year, I have to be through this book and I have to do that. So I gotta break it down and...


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[Assistant] We would, and I did try to be structured because it is too easy if you're not to say, we'll do that tomorrow, let's go surfing.


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[Assistant] You know, because you're not teaching 30 kids in the classroom. The teachers, direct attention.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then they could go have jobs. They could go, you know, be involved in sports and athletic. Mark played soccer, you know, at the local high school because you could do that. You could take the extracurricular activities and participate in those. And so Mark played soccer at our high school.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I think, you know, that's who God designed you to be.


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[Assistant] You know, you can't be a classical island if, if you're, that's not...


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[Assistant] Nope, just soccer. Came home his freshman year and he's like,


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[Assistant] Hey mom, I'm gonna be a professional soccer player. And I'm like, and I always told my kids, you put your mind to it, you can do anything you put your mind to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And when he came home and told me that, I'm like, rah-roh. Uhm, Mark?


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[Assistant] He literally had never played soccer. And because we homeschooled him, it's not like you did it in, you know, PE class.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I was like, oh, but this is what I've taught him. I'm like, alright, we'll get you, you know, enrolled in the high school at soccer and, okay, let's do this. And uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was after my husband had passed, so there was a little bit of money to at least, you know, pay the fees and get him in the program. And it was, uh, his coach was our youth pastor at our church and good family friends. And after the funeral, or maybe even at the funeral,


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[Assistant] Chuck had said, oh my gosh, he was probably the worst soccer player he'd ever seen in his life.


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[Assistant] And Mark did his freshman year, got most improved player. Granted, if you're the worst soccer player in the world.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, he became the youngest soccer coach that high school had ever had, and was in fact trying out with the Colorado Rapids, the national team in, out of Colorado. And the night before tryouts, blew out his knee, had to come home and have surgery, uhm, tourist menace, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And even missing those parts of his body still became an AVCO.


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[Assistant] But uhm, it was really cool. Probably three years ago, the Colorado Rapids reached out to me and they said, we want to present you Mark's team jersey. We know you made the team.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so I got to go up there and they had fireworks for him. They showed two different videos, three minutes long about Mark.


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[Assistant] It was good, he loved it, he was doing great, playing soccer for them there.


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[Assistant] And then after his first year when he was home that summer and he did construction work, oh my gosh, they would say,


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[Assistant] But if you know Mark, he was, he was built, you know, big guy, that's why he got the big gun, but uhm.


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[Assistant] Yeah, so to see him, you know, do those things and carry on the determination was pretty amazing.


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[Assistant] Not successful mom, but, but, you know, I did my best, but literally my kids should have been, their background should, somebody should have been, you know, killed in a drug overdose. Somebody, Cheryl should have had, you know, 15 kids by the time she was 20 and


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yep. And then, uhm, when he came home that summer, decided he was going to change his major from being a pastor, he now wanted to be a lawyer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so in my warped sense of humor, I say, first he was going to save him, then he was going to defend him, then he became a seal and said, I'll just kill him, but uhm, obviously that's a terrorist none.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But uhm, and went one semester with the switch to law. Back to the same school? Yep, back to the same school. And then said, you know what, I'm gonna go pursue, you know, the Colorado Rapids and try to be a professional soccer player. So, I think that's what, maybe he went in between


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, as he was recovering books about other Navy SEALs and what they'd gone through. Again, we, they never had swim lessons growing up. You know, we didn't have a pool.


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[Assistant] So I noticed he started going to the local community pool and.


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[Assistant] Not that I know of. I don't know that we knew anybody or he had any of those. Every kid he'd watched, you know, a movie when he was 16 that said, I want to be a Navy SEAL. You know, every young boy at that age that watches it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're gonna be a cool Navy SEAL, you know, they get all the girls, they're gonna blow things up, and...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I don't know that there was anybody or nobody, you know, obviously at home school, nobody came to school and talked to them about it. But my oldest son went in the Marines in August of 2000. My daughter's husband went in the Army in October of 2000.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And Mark went in in May of 2001 and I'm sure being the youngest, you know, he's like, I'm going to one up you guys, watch this. So very competitive.


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[Assistant] But yeaah, so on 9-11, all three of my kids' lives were involved in the military.


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[Assistant] And I could see the handwriting in the wall. I knew we were going to have loved ones deployed.


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[Assistant] I know all your family's involved. What if someone dies? And I say, well, God forbid that would ever happen.


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[Assistant] But I've seen God walk me through death before. I know he would do it again.


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[Assistant] Dealing with that, but so proud of, you know, all my kids' choice to serve in the military and to make a difference because they loved God, they loved our country. They knew it was the right thing to do, to stand for.


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[Assistant] And protect this nation that we love and I...


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[Assistant] I get so frustrated at times that, you know, obviously for those of us in the military.


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[Assistant] What you guys have sacrificed in your health, what the families have sacrificed for all the deployments that are gone with the kids, you know, not having a parent around. And it is so important.


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[Assistant] For those civilians to recognize that sacrifice that is made so that we can live free every day.


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[Assistant] And when I autograph the books that I'm contributing author and I sign it, live your life worthy of that sacrifice. And we do owe that to all of our men and women who served.


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[Assistant] To live lives honoring them and recognizing.


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[Assistant] But you need to try to understand it as much as you can. There's a huge price paid for the freedoms that you enjoy every day and don't ever take those for granted.


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[Assistant] No, I really didn't. I mean, I knew there were SEALs and I knew there were special guys, but that was about the extent of it.


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[Assistant] He was good. His mindset, you know, again, looking back from that side of it, I felt like his mindset was good. He was determined. He was gonna, you know, he was gonna do this.


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[Assistant] The point he was an hour away from being rolled forward. They had done med checks on him and he had pneumonia.


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[Assistant] And he had, uh, pulmonary edema. So he had water in the lungs and water outside the lungs and they pulled him from training.


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[Assistant] And even then he was like, no, no, I got this, I can do this. And uhm,


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[Assistant] They said, no, we lost a guy two classes ago. Exactly. We have to pull you. And so as you can imagine, very,


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[Assistant] Devastated, you know, that that happened. He had to start all the way back at the beginning.


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[Assistant] You know, wait for the next class. He was picking up trash or doing something in between and, you know, very frustrated, but he's ready to go at it again. And uhm,


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[Assistant] Then that was class 239 that he started in, then 240 he started over again and got to Hell Week and Monday night at Hell Week he called me and he said, hey mom, I'm D.O.R.ed, which dropped on request, request, he rang the bell. And I'm like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, and the joke story is, I'm like, yeah, whatever. I know how bad you want it. There's no way. So what else is going on? He goes, mom, I'm serious to ring the bell. I'm like, Marks, knock it off. You know, this is not something you joke about.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's like, Mom, it's Monday night of Hell Week. I wouldn't have privileges to call you if I was still in Hell Week. And I'm like, Oh, I remember that from before. And of course, when you,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ring the bell and then you still owe the Navy time. You don't just go back home and get a new job and move on with life.


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[Assistant] Yeah, no, he, uhm, was sent to Virginia Beach, was, uh, signed to the USS, I always have to stop and think if it's Enterprise or Eisenhower, Eisenhower. Uh huh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it was in dry dock. So he was sent to the army base there to drive a shuttle bus for them. I have a picture of him.


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[Assistant] Hate in life. He was not happy. And I remember him calling me and saying, Mom, I screwed up. I'm like, what'd you do now? He goes, I shouldn't have rang the bell. And I said,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I said then you need to get your butt back there. You need to do whatever it takes. If you're sure this is where you're supposed to be and where God wants you, you get to do it. And he had, it took him about a year. He had to do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Meet with officers, he had to do extra PT, he had to write essays, I mean, the evals and stuff, and rightfully so. How do they know you've already quit once?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, how do we know we get you back there and spend all this money training you and, and you quit again. You know, so he really had to prove himself and he did and ended up being in running for the honor man.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, you know, but he just realized this is what I'm supposed to do, you know, and like I told him, if you do not do what God designed you to do, you're going to come home and kick the dog and your wife, you're going to be fighting all the time with your girlfriend or, you know, you need to be where you're supposed to be. And so, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I think he, he, are you giving a couple tries in pool club?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I did, yep. Came out to the graduation and one of my favorite pictures that I have was Mark and I on the O course after he graduated. Oh yea, I've seen that picture. Yea, love that picture or so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He trained to make a difference in the world and, you know, to get rid of the evil that's out there.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I don't think it changed Mark. You know, he's always been...


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[Assistant] Shoot the balls at him so he could, you know, practice dribbling or heading it or.


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[Assistant] And, uh, so that's, that's who Mark was. I don't think it changed him. I think there's some things that might have, you know, habits that he developed, maybe a little bit different, but it didn't change who Mark was. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The, the Charlie patch. I mean, that's the emblem on there is the Cadillac emblem. So yeah, that was part of the connection to the.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you guys did try to, you know, the new guys come to the platoon and you guys try to make it terrible for them. And then I heard that they tried to do that with Mark and after a couple of days, you're like, oh my gosh, we love this guy. We can't, we can't do this. That you took bets on how long he carried the gun with no sling, the big gun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I knew that he was going to Romadi, but I don't remember now that you mentioned that because he came home before he deployed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, his birthday's in March, and it was you guys deployed, I think, the end of March, beginning of April. And so he was there for his birthday and I had taken him to, or just down the street from where the Rangers and the Royals do their spring training.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so I've taken him to a baseball game and had after the seventh or eighth inning on the marker board, they put.


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[Assistant] Happy 28th birthday. Have a safe deployment. Love ya, mom.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But the guy said when he got back, he was all like, kiss what my mom did for me.


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[Assistant] I remember when he was getting ready to leave and pulling away, Maya came with him.


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[Assistant] I don't feel good about this. I am not a warrior or a freighter. That is just not my personality.


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[Assistant] You know, as you guys say, the hellhole of Iraq are the worst piece of real estate over there. But I really, you know, knew that it was in God's hands, whatever the outcome was. But I think we all felt like you guys were invincible. You're trained well, you've got great equipment. You know, you're gonna be fine. You're gonna be good to go. You know, I think we had lost


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, now looking back at it, you know, Operation Red Wing was just the year before. And I think in the community, we felt like we paid our dues. You know, we paid the price. We're good to go. Nothing's gonna happen for a while.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so I think when we lost Mark, I think it was definitely a wake up call and the community go, oh man, we are still invisible. There are still going to be, you know, a cost here. But I don't remember if it was at


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] At that point I think you're right, I don't think he knew then, he just knew he was going to Iraq.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We weren't doing anything real dangerous. He was just training the Iraqis. And we had a couple conversations and I'm like, well, so what the heck's taking so long?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You keep training them for months, I mean, you're just teaching them to shoot and how to, you know, maneuver and do things.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The reality of the language barrier and just some of their customs and uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I think he, you know, pretty well protected us to really know the extent of, you know, he'd say I'm going out on a mission, but...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I know at one point he did say that, you know, the numbers that you guys...


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[Assistant] For the number of missions, but I don't think I completely understood. I obviously knew he was in a very dangerous place. I was watching all the casualties come in every day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, even then, you know, my first trip over to Iraq, I got to meet the interpreter.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was with you guys who had been sick that day and didn't go out on that mission. Of course, he.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Felt like that was his fault that we lost Mark, that if he could have been there, you know, he could have saved Mark.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like I've told so many others, there was somebody bigger in control that day, you know, that not that God caused Mark's death at all.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But he could have stopped it and he chose not to, and I think we're blessed 16 and a half years later to see the impact Mark's still making today.


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[Assistant] And the lives he is still saving his teammates lives. You know, we were in an event yesterday that was a funeral for one of our guys.


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[Assistant] You know, we've helped through the foundation that wouldn't have happened if it wouldn't have been for the sacrifice that Mark chose to make, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Soccer field in Ramadi, you know, trade-up building, you know, that was named after Mark on the base. You know, movies, books, you know, and I know we've been up to Mark's grave before and I've said, man, that's the hardest thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To see your kid's name on a headstone. You know, that's not normal. That's not the way.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Life should be, we should be living full lives and dying in our old age. But when we have heroes who did what Mark did and what you guys did, their stories need to be told. People need to understand.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know you guys are some of the toughest warriors that we have in America.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'll tell you what, some of the most kind, compassionate, caring men I've ever known.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And how God gets that mixture together in your body is, it's absolutely amazing, so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I think part of that was he was secure.


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[Assistant] He knew if anything happened, not that he wanted something to happen, but he knew if anything happened, he knew he was going.


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[Assistant] You know, lots of times I've thought about him up there and his oneriness. I'm sure God's maybe sometimes going, oh boy, maybe we should send it back.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That it wasn't over for him. It might be over for him here on earth, but he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt where he's going. And you know, oftentimes,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, people tell me, oh yeah, Mark's in Valhalla, you know, warrior's heaven, you know, because of what he did for his country. I'm like, okay, well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He knew. He knew a hundred percent. You know? And for me, then what's that mean for me? How do I get to heaven if I gotta die for my country? No. Mark's in heaven because he knew Jesus Christ was his Lord and Savior. End of story. You know? It's not based on what we do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or what we don't do, or what we say, or what we don't say, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Christ already paid that price for us and Mark knew that beyond a shadow of a doubt. And so I think that was the smile on his face. He wasn't scared, you know, he may have had fear and had that courage to push through it, but he knew the end of the story.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I really did not know a lot about the team. I had met Bobby Gassoff, who was his swim buddy, and I think Matty Long.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I met them briefly at graduation, but I didn't know any of the other guys, didn't know anything about really what was going on. You know, obviously what I know now is what I've learned afterwards, but yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you see the transformation that happened for Mark, what he saw over there, what he endured.


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[Assistant] Oh my gosh, I'm not any different than the rest of you. When I was there, all he did was take. You know, he realized the blessings that we do have.


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[Assistant] And I can't, I've never been able to get through that letter without getting choked up at the end where he says halfway through the deployment. Can't wait to see your faces. And I know one day I'll see him again. And he successfully completed his mission. He did what he was supposed to do over there.


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[Assistant] But for us, we're halfway through deployment. There's still something we're here and we're supposed to do.


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[Assistant] And that was Mark's challenge, but there's, I mean, we could do a whole podcast on dissecting just that letter apart and what he talks in there.


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[Assistant] You see so many people coming into our country and trying to change it into something else? You see people, I've seen Colin Kaepernick in that.


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[Assistant] You know, multi-million dollar sports figures complain. And I said, Mark stood.


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[Assistant] Unlike that red stripe on that flag that represents my son's blood, you will not disrespect that and so many others that have given so much.


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[Assistant] You know, he talks about the random acts of kindness. You know, and that's kinda how the foundation...


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[Assistant] You know, not officially, but that's how I started doing those things to honor Mark. I could pay for a stranger's cup of coffee. I could pay for a meal. Tank of gas back then wasn't as expensive as it is now, but I could do those things. I understood.


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[Assistant] You know, it talks about opening a door for, you know, someone or helping them with their groceries in or out of their car. What's happened to America that we've gotten so far away from that? You know, and to end that with, to my family and friends, do me a favor. Pass on the kindness, the love, the precious gift of human life.


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[Assistant] But holy cow is America, what's happened to us? Why can't we pass on that kindness? We can have different opinions. That's what you guys fought for so we could have those different opinions. But that doesn't mean you need to be so mean and hateful to people.


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[Assistant] And I just really think some of those things, basically, if we did those as humans that Mark challenged us to do, we'd be living in a different world.


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[Assistant] And, you know, when I first got that, like you said, it came as an email. It was about


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[Assistant] And I read through it on the computer and I was like, who wrote this?


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[Assistant] And, you know, Mark was not stupid by any means, but language, I had not seen that as a strength or, you know, his forte.


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[Assistant] And so I scroll back to the top to see who sent the email. I'm like, dang, you know, that was Mark. And you just feel the changes.


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[Assistant] And after he passed, man, whew, then that letter was even more significant.


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[Assistant] The meaning of that and the impact and literally Jaco, I don't, millions and millions of lives have been changed by Mark.


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[Assistant] I never would have thought when I held him as a little baby in the midst of all those struggles.


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[Assistant] Like I said, I didn't have high goals for him. Nobody's pregnant. Nobody's an alcoholic. Nobody's a drug addict at 18. I'm good. And to see that.


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[Assistant] And those are the things that mold us and shape us. You know, and what he saw over there.


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[Assistant] You know, he's talking about Saddam about, you know, the man who cares nothing, you know, about moral life.


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[Assistant] And on my first trip over, I was at Biop, which is in, uhm, Baghdad, which is the main base there for you guys. And there's a lot of Saddam's palaces and, uhm, the one of the palaces there.


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[Assistant] You know, and obviously he didn't care about human life. He had no morals. You know, he put all the water ways.


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[Assistant] Around his palaces because he figured that, you know, Allah wouldn't be able to see his sin.


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[Assistant] That we've got men like Mark, men like you, so many others that are willing to confront that evil that most of us in America have never even seen, or hopefully never will see. Mark talks about that, you know? And it's just amazing, you know, you talked about his humor and who he was, yet what a caring,


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[Assistant] Compassionate and his words, words of wisdom, way beyond his 28 years. Most of it takes a lifetime to get that.


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[Assistant] You know, I just, I would encourage everybody that's listening to go to our website. You can read that on our website at americasmightywarriors.org. Powerful, powerful.


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[Assistant] I don't remember when I woke up that morning, what I was doing, but uhm, I know that there was


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[Assistant] Oregon, where I raised them pretty much, uhm, down to Arizona. And I know he'd called and got the new address and new information as he was updating his paperwork before he left. But for whatever reason, they were trying to find me up in Oregon, where I'd lived.


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[Assistant] And the building, you know, where I lived, I still own, but uhm, there wasn't, it was empty.


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[Assistant] And they had been there for about eight hours trying to find, finally they knocked on one of the neighbors and they said, well she doesn't live here anymore, she lives down in Arizona.


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[Assistant] So this is the evening by that point. And like you said, they're afraid I'm going to find out on the news. So they called Luke Air Force Base isn't too far from me. So they called there and they had a small detachment of Navy that's there and sent out the Navy Keiko officer and a chaplain.


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[Assistant] And uhm, I was gone that night. I was actually at my Bible study at my small group. And uh, they waited for a while and then knocked on the...


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[Assistant] Neighbour's door and her husband had served in the military, so she kinda had a clue of what was going on. She didn't have my cell phone number, didn't know how to get a hold of me.


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[Assistant] She said, well, I know Debbie's son works at Lowe's, you know, the Lowe's just down the street. So they called Chris Durer. And again, he served in the Marines. You know.


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[Assistant] We'd had missionaries that were there speaking to our small group.


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[Assistant] And they're telling this story about Cuba and I think it was his brother-in-law.


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[Assistant] And how, you know, they had been captured for being a spy or something.


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[Assistant] We got done, we were celebrating my birthday and my girlfriend gave me one of those willow tree angels and those are the wooden angels with the wire wings.


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[Assistant] And each one usually has a character quality and the one she gave me was courage.


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[Assistant] And I always turn my phone off, that night I hadn't, and Christopher called.


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[Assistant] Nothing in his voice to alert me, he wasn't speaking too fast, he wasn't crying. He's like, hey mom, where are ya? I'm like, whoops, Wednesday night, I'm at my Bible study, why, what's up? He said, how long will it take you to get home? Oh, that's an odd question, I said.


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[Assistant] And I got in my car and there was a song from my past and it says, I put my hope in you oh lord. Trusting you, I will not be shaken.


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[Assistant] And I got to the main intersection by my house and there was probably three or four fire trucks and a couple police cars and ambulances. And I'm like, my house blew up. That's all that's wrong.


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[Assistant] And trust me, I would have rather lost all my worldly possessions and still have Mark.


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[Assistant] And to this day, I have no idea how I got through that intersection, but I got back into my subdivision. There are no more emergency vehicles. So I went back to, I know it's going to face me when I get home. And as I turned the corner, I expected to see a black car.


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[Assistant] Parked there, I guess I've watched too many movies, but there was no black car, there was no unusual car. They'd park down the street aways.


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[Assistant] And my oldest son, Christopher, was just pacing back and forth on the sidewalk. And he said, mom, the Navy's here.


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[Assistant] We walked in the house and of course they'd been in my house for a little bit because they were trying to find me. I guess I can be elusive at times. And, uh,


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[Assistant] This is what we can tell by being in your home, you're a woman of faith. You need to rely on your faith for what we're about to tell you. Your son Mark and Lee.


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[Assistant] I knew, I knew where my strength was going to come from. I knew that God was going to see me through. I knew this would be much harder than losing my husband, but I knew he would see me through. And my circumstances had drastically changed that day.


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[Assistant] I've got a skinny window next to my door in the other house that I lived in at the time.


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[Assistant] And uhm, the neighbor next door was from New York, uhm, very proper and he's like, oh no, you don't go in there, you give them time. And so they came in and we just talked about Mark and tried to process it and we cried and prayed and cried and cried.


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[Assistant] They stayed for a couple hours and it was probably about 11 o'clock and everybody had left.


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[Assistant] My son Christopher was still there. He served in the Marines. He was in Okinawa for five years or plus. Met his wife over there and uhm,


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[Assistant] She, before they had five kids, would go home every year for six weeks. And my daughter and my daughter-in-law had both just lost babies the year before at five and a half months in their pregnancy, which is pretty unusual. You lose a child that far along.


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[Assistant] And of course our first thought was, oh no, no more loss, no more babies. They were just both three months in their pregnancy.


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[Assistant] And so he had decided to protect her, to not tell her what was going on. He knew that she'd be back home before the funeral. And how he did that,


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[Assistant] Struggling with probably the toughest pain he's ever known and not tell his wife and carry on conversations is beyond me, but...


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[Assistant] He said, mom, I'm gonna stay here tonight. I said, thank you, son.


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[Assistant] At that point I'd been a widow for 12 years and so there was nobody there. And I remember thinking, okay.


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[Assistant] God's promised to be a husband to the widow and a father to the fatherless. I know where my strength's gonna come.


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[Assistant] And so I went and grabbed my Bible and just opened it, and it opened to Psalms 27. That's right where it plopped open. It said, Lord is my light and my salvation. Whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life. Of whom shall I be afraid?


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[Assistant] When the wicked came against me to eat up my flesh, my enemies and my foes, they stumbled and they fell. Though an army may rise against me, I will not fear.


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[Assistant] The war may come against me and I read that going, oh my goodness, did, did you write this today for me, for my first circumstances? And the end of it says, I would have lost hope.


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[Assistant] Closed my Bible and I saw that courage thing again. I got the courage angel at the beginning of the night.


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[Assistant] Now God's reminding me again, courage. I'm like, I got it, Lord.


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[Assistant] And as I sat there and was praying, I've never audibly heard God speak, but in my thoughts He said,


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[Assistant] I want you to read this at Mark's funeral. I want you to give everybody else the same hope that I've given you.


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[Assistant] As I said, I was a rebel in my twenties. Well, my teenagers too.


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[Assistant] I've learned that if he asks me to do something, to just obey and do it, it may not make any sense. He tells us his ways are not our ways. But I'm sure I kind of was like a teenager and kind of went, are you kidding me, God?


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[Assistant] It's my son's funeral. I don't know if I'll throw up or pass out. I don't know what I'll do. And I pause and I say,


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[Assistant] I will walk through whatever doors you open thinking it just meant to speak at Mark's funeral.


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[Assistant] I know that if God would have told me what he had in store and all the different places that I'd be at one point, I spoke in front of a million people in the wall, the mall in Washington, DC.


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[Assistant] And I was terrified, terrified to speak in front of people. The preschool and kindergarten, we had two programs a year, one at Christmas and one at the kindergarten graduation. I would literally


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[Assistant] Hold the microphone with both hands and it'd still be bouncing all over. Cause I was terrified.


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[Assistant] To be in front of people. So this was not my comfort zone. This wasn't something I'm like, oh yeah, I'm such a great speaker. Uh, yeah, this would be awesome. I'm like, okay. And uhm,


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[Assistant] To see what he's done and the toughest thing that I could go through in life and how he's taken that.


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[Assistant] Taking Marks Royce's story to continue to impact people and change the world is nothing but a miracle, you know. But again,


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[Assistant] The toughest thing I've ever known, you know, you can't, uhm,


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[Assistant] You can't get stuck in it because then you don't heal and you don't get to the healthier side.


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[Assistant] But all the reading I've done on grief that said that's the toughest thing you could ever go through is the instant death of a child.


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[Assistant] And I would have to agree with that, you know, granted my husband wasn't the love of my life that I'd been married to for fifty years, but...


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[Assistant] You know, if we allow him, he will take that and use that for his glory.


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[Assistant] And, you know, in his wisdom, he doesn't have in me, I'm not flying planes going, oh, well, yeah, it's just cause I'm so good at this. That's why it's working. It's like, no, no, you don't understand. I don't have any skills or talents to be a public speaker, never taking classes on it. You know, it's just.


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[Assistant] The majority of you guys, it was when you came back from that deployment. Uh, I, yesterday we were at the funeral and I was like, who spoke at Mark's funeral? I'm like, how can you not remember your son's ceremony and who spoke?


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[Assistant] I remember being in another one in the same, it was at the, uh, chapel there on


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[Assistant] So, I don't, I know Bobby Gasoff, uhm, at first that was his, Mark's swim buddy, and yeaah, and that's a pretty tight connection with your swim buddy.


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[Assistant] And they weren't going to send him at first because they said, no, he's in too much pain. This is not who we send. And of course now they've learned that that is. And, um, they said, um, Commodore Pibas at the time at now, Admiral Pibas was on our doorstep the next morning.


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[Assistant] Caring man. And again, I still don't even, at that point, didn't understand the ranks. I knew Admiral was something special, but.


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[Assistant] And I remember them saying, what else can we do for you? I'm like, give me Bobby Gasoff. I want Bobby here. And so, uh, they did get Bobby home.


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[Assistant] I think he might have been in the Philippines at the time. He stayed with me. He and his wife, uhm, stayed with us for a week.


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[Assistant] That was pretty close, it was like 7, 7 and a half weeks. But I think the majority of that started, uh, by phone calls and emails while you guys were still deployed. You know, uhm, I remember thinking,


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[Assistant] Oh my gosh, I can't make any decisions. My brain is mush.


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[Assistant] Holy cow, those guys are in combat. They've got life or death decisions they've gotta make. And once I realized...


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[Assistant] Having Mark's brothers in our home for the week? Wow.


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[Assistant] You guys love Mark as much as we did and you were hurting just us. And that's why I'm like, Oh, the brotherhood thing. I got it now. It makes sense. And


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[Assistant] So my concern for you guys is you're in that combat zone. You're still going out on patrol. Man, how are you guys going to deal with this? How are you guys going to process and stay safe? You know, and you,


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[Assistant] You know, I think it was Leif was the one. I'm like, you guys go back out there. You, you go get some, you know, don't, don't hang in your rooms and, you know, Mark would want you to continue the mission.


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[Assistant] That's really when those relationships started. I got a copy of the Charlie Pattoon picture.


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[Assistant] And I'd say, okay, who's the one on the left? And I'd write the name down. Okay. The tall guy in the middle, who's that? And of course they gave me their name names. And then they talk about Biff or I'm like,


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[Assistant] But, and I get phone calls even from some of the moms of the guys, you know, checking on me and I knew, I didn't know I was going to start a foundation.


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[Assistant] But we had a lot of support up to the funeral. And then I live in Arizona. I'm not near a base. I'm not here, you know, San Diego where, you know, the rest of the community is, or major part of it.


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[Assistant] But once the funeral was over, there was nothing. I mean, other than talking to you guys over there. It just, you know, it stopped.


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[Assistant] And I'm like, oh crud, well it's just starting for me now. The process, the journey of grief is just starting. And I'm, I've never been one to feel sorry for myself.


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[Assistant] I was like, okay, I can't change anything for myself, but I can change it so nobody else has to go through without having support. There's somebody that knows what it's like. So when I got the call,


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[Assistant] That Mikey had died. I knew I had to be there. I didn't know what I was going to do, but I just knew I had to be there. And then that was about the time.


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[Assistant] You know, the first ones were starting to come back home. And I'm like, man, I gotta be there for my boys. Not to be, oh my gosh, there's poor Mark's mom.


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[Assistant] But to say woohoo, the rest of my boys are home, you know, thank you, thank you. And uhm.


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[Assistant] You know, so I was here and then came over for the funeral. I remember coming over and it was the same hotel where they'd put us up for Mark's funeral.


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[Assistant] Same black vehicles, I don't know if it's the exact same but, you know, that black SUV that you guys have. And I was standing down there that morning, um, giving, you know, Sally and the family big hugs and said I'm so sorry. And, uh,


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[Assistant] Admiral McGuire came down and asked how I was doing.


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[Assistant] I'm like, oh, no, no, no, no, I'm not here. This is not about Mark. This is not, not about me at all. I'm just here to support the family. And they said exactly, you know, in, in, in almost a panic.


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[Assistant] And he said, exactly, that's why we want you in the vehicle to support them. I'm like, okay. So now I'm in the vehicle reliving.


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[Assistant] Same place, although now I know what it's like to get the folded flag. I know what it's be- to be done with a funeral and start that grieving process. Amanda just-


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[Assistant] Be there. Don't worry about what you should say, what you shouldn't say. Should I take anything? Should I not take anything? Just be there. It means so much to have someone else there with you.


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[Assistant] If they want to talk about it, they'll probably open up and start talking about it. You don't need to worry. You know, it's not like I don't remember that, you know, I had a son Mark and what happened to him, but it's so important to be there. And that was really.


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[Assistant] The first family that we supported, you know, we got pretty close to the Monsur family.


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[Assistant] You know, to be able to support and honor Mikey, but because I love that family.


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[Assistant] I understand their sacrifice and that's really what started the America's Mighty Warriors process thinking. And then I would just happen to be in Washington DC when Jay Redmond was there.


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[Assistant] You know, before even the note was posted on the door of, you know.


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[Assistant] Don't feel sorry for me. If you're coming in here to feel sorry for me, I earned these wounds doing what I, you know, love doing and don't, I don't need your sympathy.


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[Assistant] I was in the hospital when Dan Knotson was brought down from surgery. I just happened to be in Washington, DC. So these things just kept happening.


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[Assistant] That is, my spiritual gift is to be an encourager and, you know, to support people. And so that's where...


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[Assistant] My strength, that's where I work well when I'm doing those things.


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[Assistant] And then after a while, I'm like, ah, okay, I get it. I think there's a mission ahead. I don't think I'm just supposed to do this once or twice. And uhm, you know, that's when I'm like, okay, I can't continue to afford to fund this on my own dime. So we really do need to. So officially we started the foundation in 2008, but uhm,


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[Assistant] And the name of it, America's Mighty Warriors, the meaning of the name Mark means Mighty Warrior. You know, he definitely lived up to his name.


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[Assistant] And it was, it was from a menu. As I mentioned, I'd already gone through the divorce. I was by myself here. I'm having this baby. I have a three and a half year old, two year old.


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[Assistant] Now another little one. Of course, back then you stayed three days in the hospital. That was...


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[Assistant] Common, if you, it was rare that they let you go before that. And they always ask, do you have small children and do you have help?


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[Assistant] Yes, I have small children. No, I have no help. And uhm,


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[Assistant] I, I knew that they heard two heartbeats. I knew that I knew that I knew I was having twin girls. So I had names picked out for girls, but no boy names. And uhm, they came in the day after he was born and said, you gotta go home. We need your bed. You know, I'm like,


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[Assistant] But but, I don't have help and I've smudged in there like, sorry.


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[Assistant] No one to discuss it with, no one to figure it out, and he was born in March. I looked down at the menu for the day that was on my tray table.


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[Assistant] And the H was covered up and I saw MARC. Being a Debbie, everybody in my era


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[Assistant] At least half the world, I think, was named Debbie. We were cheerleaders, ten of us. Five of us were named Debbie. And you'd say, Debbie, and half the hall would go, huh? And I'm like, I don't want that for my kids. I want them to have


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[Assistant] But uhm, so when I saw Mark with a C, because back then everybody was spelling Mark with a K, and I did not...


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[Assistant] Is America's Mighty Warriors, because it's not just about Mark. Obviously, Mark's the story we tell. Mark's the reason that we do what we do.


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[Assistant] But it's about every man and woman who's served. It's about every other family who's lost a loved one. You know, and that's...


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[Assistant] Been, you know, a lot of work, a lot of challenges, but man, what a blessing, what a reward to be able to


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[Assistant] I have that relationship. I had a call from one of the other guys, the team guy that we're helping. Haven't heard from him for a while.


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[Assistant] He goes, I don't know you well, it wasn't any, Mark's teammates, you know, they're really close ones. But there's something unique about


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[Assistant] My relationship with the ones that I first meet.


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[Assistant] You know, and he said, he's having some struggles. He said, you were the first one I thought of to be able to reach out to. And that God has


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[Assistant] Giving me that blessing, that honor to be able to be there.


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[Assistant] And to understand and give you guys hope and encouragement, yeah, I'm not gonna baby you. If you think you're coming to Pommalee, aww.


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[Assistant] I'm gonna listen, I'm gonna hear you out, I'm gonna validate it, but then I'm gonna say, get your butt up, here's what you need to do. You know, lovingly, but you guys don't need somebody pampering a baby in you guys, that's not who you are. You know, and uhm,


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[Assistant] I will do that, you know, until God gives me my final breath to be able to continue to support you guys and be there for you.


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[Assistant] Just, it's not going to happen. You're home. You're safe. Same thing with Chris. Same thing with Seth. You know, you're just like, wait, he did all those paddles? Ryan survived? Like you said.


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[Assistant] A lot of the guys said they didn't think there was any way he could survive those wounds. He did. He thrived. He didn't just survive.


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[Assistant] You know, I've got still a pound of the elk meat in my freezer that I'll never eat from the elk that he went out and shot as a blind person.


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[Assistant] Well, and it was, I had a more physical violent reaction when I found out about Chris than I did with Mark.


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[Assistant] But uhm, I actually threw up and I was freaked out. I'm just like, and uhm, I had found out uhm,


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[Assistant] Another one. You know, and uhm, I thought about that and I thought,


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[Assistant] This is just part of what comes along when you love people. And sometimes the grief is, you know, part of that love, you know, that you cared for.


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[Assistant] And Chris and I had just been at Shot Show. We were trying to rebrand him. He wasn't taking any money from the book.


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[Assistant] He'd started his, uhm, tactical company, Kraft.


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[Assistant] He was paying his staff, but he still wasn't making much from them. So we were trying to rebrand him, you know, so he could have some regular money coming in for him.


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[Assistant] And it was amazing time, uh, so many great memories, you know, from those four days that we were.


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[Assistant] I mean, people have tried to in the media portray that as


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[Assistant] The guy that shot him had PTS and this was because of war. No.


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[Assistant] The guy was messed up before. He tried killing a family member as a teenager.


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[Assistant] And his family to protect him didn't, you know, report that to the police.


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[Assistant] And Chris, you know, Chris had a huge heart. That was where, you know, his kids went to school. The mother of the guy that killed him was, you know, one of the aides in one of his kids class. And she just said, Hey, he's really struggling since he came back, you know, from his deployment. Do you think you could help him?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, I hold her culpable for not sharing the extent of that because Chris would have done something else. He still would have helped him, but he'd have done something else that day. And the guy wasn't, you know.


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[Assistant] Far enough gone, he knew what he was doing. You know, he waited till they'd fired all their ammunition.


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[Assistant] Chris had holstered his weapon and he shot Chris first and then.


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[Assistant] His buddy, Chad, and then he went and got a taco before he went to his sister's house.


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[Assistant] So yeaah, and you know, I know we've talked about this before, Jaco, but I'm like, Chris's mom's name was Debbie. My name's Debbie. Seth's mom's Debbie.


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[Assistant] So I'm like, if you're in Charlie Petunia and your mom's name is Debbie, please go tell her to change her name. You know, but it's just...


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[Assistant] So much is given, you know, and yet so much was required.


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[Assistant] So, uh, and probably that was stronger when you guys were still in combat. Any issues that there were for our veterans? We're going to stand up and change this. We're going to make it right.


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[Assistant] I don't know if you remember back in, you might have been deployed then, but Delta Airlines, I think it was 2008, they were charging our troops coming back from the combat zone excess baggage fees.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I'm like, oh, come on, no, that can't really be true. And I've never been one just to react.


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[Assistant] And so I called Delta Airlines and I just said, you know, I understand that you guys are charging our service members who are coming back excess baggage fees. Yes, that's our policy, that's correct. So we do understand they're bringing back


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're weapons that they've used to defend you and your freedom.


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[Assistant] You know, it's not like they went R and R and they're bringing Turkish rugs back home. And she said, yes ma'am, we understand that. I said, well.


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[Assistant] You really need to refund that money to them. Well, that's not our policy. We're not going to do that. I said well.


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[Assistant] I've got a pretty big, you know, following and outreach. If you don't, refund that to them. Then I'm gonna let people know the details. I'm gonna give them your phone numbers, your emails. Which is okay, fine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, frequent flyers with Delta, they cancelled their flights, and obviously it wasn't just me.


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[Assistant] You know, it was the sphere of influence, you know, that God's placed around me to help do that. But the one voice, one person can make a difference.


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[Assistant] My son's blood is on that soil? Don't tell me that's not significance that the enemy flag's flying up there again.


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[Assistant] And so again, I'm like, okay, called the Pentagon. I wanted his address. I mean, they gave me the main address for the Pentagon. I'm like, I wasn't born yesterday.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He has an address where his mail goes. I'm not going to send this where you get millions of pieces of mail a day. Could I please have his address to send that to him? And they said, no, here's the address. I'm like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, so I mailed it off, but then I sent out to my media contacts. And uhm,


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[Assistant] I got a call Saturday morning from his PAO and he said, uhm, ma'am, we understand that you've demanded an apology from the Joint Chiefs of Staff.


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[Assistant] You know, veteran who left a body part behind there. It's every other family who's lost a loved one there. You should know better than anybody else how powerful your words are and what that meant.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He said, well, I want you to know, you know, he carries in his pocket jacket, the names of the fallen and he rotates that out. I'm like, great, then he's going to have no problem apologizing. And he goes, well ma'am, that's not going to happen.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, national media. And I just got off Lou Dobbs show on, uhm, on Fox and was in the car coming back home. And I had looked at, uhm, I think it was Facebook. I had a message.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because they called the office but I wasn't there and they were trying to reach me right away and they, you know, said please call whatever the PAO's name was and he said,


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[Assistant] And I got home and my son Christopher and one of his buddies were there already. And they're like, Oh my gosh. And my daughter-in-law being from Japan, you know, she's like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, so he apologized. What's the big deal? And my son's like, well, he's in charge of the Army, the Navy, the Marine Corps, you know, the Air Force, and uhm,


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[Assistant] Again, I don't ever want to be Cindy Sheehan was, you know, out there and.


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[Assistant] Who believed in the mission, who believed in what he was doing, just like Mark did. And how you can take an opposite stand to me, that's disrespectful to your loved one who gave their life. You can have a different opinion, but that's not how you honor them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I honored and respected Mark and everything that I did and that I don't ever do anything to dishonor him or his name or his sacrifice.


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[Assistant] You know, and she was pretty wackadoodle in some of her tactics. That was the, uhm, Medea Benjamin and what was the name, Code Pink.


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[Assistant] Well, I confronted them numerous times in, in DC, but, um,


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[Assistant] You know, just passionate about making sure that you guys get what you're entitled to. You know, rules of engagement back then were pretty bad so we worked on that.


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[Assistant] Uhm, our random acts of kindness that Mark talks about. We started with the coffee, meals, tanking gas, and do those often. You know, thank you, Mark.


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[Assistant] For leaving that because on those tough days, that's what I go do. And it really changes things, you know, when I go to an Air Force base or go in a village in and see the, you know, Vietnam veteran hats or whatever and you go up and you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But uhm, and we expanded that program. It goes up to a $5,000 grant. So uhm, just this last week we had two different SEAL families, and we do all branches of the military. Obviously, the SEAL community is my family, so you know, we do a lot for, for them, but uhm, had circumstances that we were able to help with a $5,000 check for each family.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, you know, that the veteran can't come ask because there are veterans, unfortunately, are just going from charity to charity to see what they can take, you know, and that's not who we want to help. So, you know, you could reach out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And say, you know, here's the circumstance, you know, their child has cancer and, you know, they need somebody to take care of their other kids while they're in the hospital all the time or, you know, unfortunately we do a lot of funeral expenses.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, again, there's swimming pools, there's kayaking, there's ziplining.


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[Assistant] But uhm, we have a house in Arizona called the Heroes Hope Home and one in Florida called the Trinity Hope Home where they can come stay free for a week. We take care of their flights, their rental car, everything and just love and pamper on them. Let them know. We won't forget your hero and we won't forget you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, our biggest program right now is our Helping Heroes Heal program. Right. And that's for our veterans, combat veterans who are diagnosed with traumatic brain injury, post-traumatic stress. Uh, many of them suicidal. And we're paying for hyperbaric oxygen therapy, hormone and supplement therapy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I get it. I really do understand why they want to try anything and everything to get rid of the pain, whether it's physical, mental, spiritual, all the above. I get that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But let's try things that are proven to heal you. We've been doing spec scans of the brain before and after. And to see those is just phenomenal. Some of them I see them the first time before they go through the treatment. I'm like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How are you even functioning? I mean, literally, it looks like an RPG went through their head.


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[Assistant] Contrasting scan afterwards and to hear their stories.


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[Assistant] Who'd gone through the program and I called to just check and see what symptoms are different. You know, what'd you notice? Cause everybody heals differently. Everybody has a different extent of their injuries and he went through the things that were better.


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[Assistant] Give your life for me. This literally is a no-brainer that I would do this for you. And he paused and he said, stop.


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[Assistant] I'm like, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, rawr, raw


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[Assistant] Oh my gosh, he's still saving his teammates. He's not physically here, but he's still saving his teammates. And so to see that impact.


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[Assistant] You know, to continue to be, even if that were only one time, mission accomplished, woohoo, but to see that continue to happen over and over and over.


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[Assistant] You know, I know yesterday as we were at the funeral, there's, you know, so many more of our guys that this, uhm, has caused things to surface in them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I probably had at least 10 yesterday that were like, we need to help Mama Lee.


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[Assistant] You know, but God allowed me to be able to do that and to be able to.


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[Assistant] Continue to meet so many of our amazing warriors who give so much, and their families.


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[Assistant] Guys and gals that are listening who served, if you are diagnosed with TBI,


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[Assistant] Or PTS, or if you're struggling with suicide, please, please reach out. I know that you get to that place where you feel like there's no hope.


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[Assistant] You've tried different therapies that maybe haven't worked and you feel like this is how I'm going to have to live the rest of my life.


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[Assistant] And there's things that we can do to heal that. So please, that is not a sign of weakness to ask for help. That takes courage. That takes strength. You're being a leader to be able to do that. So please reach out to us. Uhm, my husband committed suicide 28 years ago.


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[Assistant] So that's another thing that we've lived through that gives us the ability. You're not gonna say anything that's gonna freak me out or scare me or cause me to react irrationally.


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[Assistant] I'm going to be there to give you hope, to listen to you, to encourage you and let you know in that healing process where you're at.


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[Assistant] And we've, we've suffered too many losses and it's got to stop. It's got to start.


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[Assistant] A different attitude, you know, at the head shed in our, our different branches of the military.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, I tell him, if you flashed your leg in combat, you wouldn't be like, ah, I'm good, I got this, I'm fine. No, you'd be like, get a tourniquet quick!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When you guys notice those differences, you need to say quick. Get a tourniquet. I need help.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, once a day is the preferred, so 40 consecutive treatments. The therapy does build on the oxygen from the first treatment, the second treatment builds on that, has a greater impact, greater impact. So it does need to be 40 consecutive. Sometimes we can't get


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, time, you know, if guys are still contracting and they're still going overseas and stuff, they can't do that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yes, there has to be four hours in between so they don't risk, um, oxygen toxicity, but it's so safe, there's not...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Any, you know, it's like you read the prescription bottles for a lot of the medications that our veterans are taking and.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm not a doctor. I've never played one on TV, but that makes no sense to me. Why? Even if it were a small chance, if they're already depressed and discouraged, why would we give them something that that could be a side effect? And the impact, we had one of our veterans who was on 53 prescription drugs at the same time. Your kidney and your liver is not designed to process that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, and half the time, one prescription they're giving you is to relieve the symptom from the other prescription. You know, it's like, oh my goodness, but yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The things that you're doing, we've also done spec scans on people that are drinking and compared that to a TBI and the alcohol is just as bad as the


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Plast wave exposure that's damaged your brain. Same thing with the marijuana, the illegal drugs. Stop already. Do you really want to get well? Like I said, I get why you want to mask the symptoms, but you're only making it worse. And so you need to do those things. You need to be working out regularly. There's a feel good endorphin.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm like, holy cow, why do we feel so good when we do an intense workout? You know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For your brain health, the most effective way to eat is the high protein, low carb, you know? And so make those choices, do those things that are not damaging your cells, not destroying more than you already have.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, so many of you guys and gals have been fighters, you know!


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[Assistant] You have to know the tactics. You have to put on your full armor every day.


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[Assistant] No, that's crazy. You didn't say, I'm not taking grenades with me today or I'm not taking my water. That's, you know, extra weight. I'll be good. No, you put your full kit on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you were prepared for plan A, B, C, D, however far you needed to go. Probably even put an extra grenade in there. Just to be ready, but you knew the enemy. You knew the tactics.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you know, there's a component of spiritual battle that's going on here too.


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[Assistant] And so you have to know that enemy. You need to put on your gear every day and be prepared. And then the self-talk that we tell ourselves.


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[Assistant] Rarely plays cause he knows that's not effective on me, but we have to.


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[Assistant] Reprogram that self-talk that we tell ourselves.


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[Assistant] And so you find out what that truth is. Whatever you're struggling with, I can guarantee you there's a scripture in the Bible that deals with that. That, that once you've got that memorized, but uhm, you've got to do that warfare. It's a different kind of battle, but it is still a battle.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But uhm, I did not take a salary for the first 10 years. I was so committed to making sure you guys got the healing. And not that because I take a salary now I'm not committed, but uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wanted to prove ourself as one of those charities.


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[Assistant] That don't waste your money. When you're giving your money to us, you can count on it's not being wasted. We're not having a big party somewhere, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We could use, you know, someone to donate an audit. You know, we've got a lawyer on our board, so that's taken care of. We don't pay legal fees. If you're a graphic design artist or social media, reach out. We need volunteers to help.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's a commitment. And we do have, uh, we work with facilities all over the United States. So sometimes there's a clinic near you and you don't have to go away for the 40 days, but you do have to then arrange your schedule. So if you're going in at seven o'clock in the morning and it's a half an hour to drive to get there, it's going to be a couple hours out of your day, but it is so worth that commitment for the life change that happens.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe, maybe. I'm trying to think if there's anything else. You know, again, just a reminder that if you need help, we are here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's no excuse. Pick up the phone. We don't give you, we don't tell people who we're taking care of. Your information doesn't go anywhere. We don't report it to your commands. We're here to help. Uhm, obviously,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We've already had a huge outpouring. So if you're someone that can help support a veteran, if you're a corporation, you can do, you know,


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[Assistant] A nice charity, or donation to our charity, if you can organize a fundraiser.


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[Assistant] You know, we need the money to come in to be able to continue to take care of these guys. I'll tell you what, I'm not going to be a happy camper.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If we ever got to a place where someone who has was struggling to reach out, calls finally, and I have to say, I'm sorry, we don't have any money to be able to do that for you. Yeah, that ain't gonna happen. I'm gonna be selling my own stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, uh, I mean, come on, these are our men and women who have sacrificed greatly for us.


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[Assistant] And I feel like we do a terrible job as a nation getting your health restored to you. You know, especially in our community, you get the best training, you get the best equipment, you get the best missions, and then you come home and you get out and I feel like it's that leaving a man behind.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The VA, and I know there are some good VAs, but they should be disgraceful, you know, for the lack of the care and the time that our veterans have to wait.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Would you guys know what he was saying? He's like, I got the lead on this. You guys follow me. I can't do it alone. Let's go together as a team. And that's what it is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, and that's my challenge. I'm saying on me, come on people, let's go. Whether you need help and you need to reach out and ask for help, whether you can help support us, whether you can donate, you know, monthly, whether you can donate a service.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's a team. This doesn't just happen because Debbie does it every day.


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[Assistant] You know, and I'm blessed Choco by you guys who faithfully do the match when we do the muster. You know, and on average we'll raise 30, $40,000 at a muster.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, so thank you for the impact that you guys have made and continue to make, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That I'm blessed to be Mama Lee and, you know, have you guys in as part of the family and, uhm, so, so, so great.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, I had no choice, the news that was given to me on August 2nd. I could have stuffed my fingers in my ear, I could have refused to go home, talked to the Kaco officer, but that wanted to change the fact that Mark was gone. And often times in life, we're faced with financial, health, relationship issues.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I think a big part of some of the struggles that I've seen are


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Our men and women is the shame issue. You know, let go of that shame, let go of that guilt. If there is something you are involved in, ask for forgiveness.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's a lot different when you're on it versus when you're organizing it and planning it and promoting it, but uhm, there's some great wisdom. We had so many great guys come on there, so yes, we have a YouTube channel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I tell you what, he does have a sense of humor, people. He does have emotions and very much carries that. Mark's lost.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well actually it's funny cause even right when you just said bouncer it hit me so clearly.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Remembering that experience, yeaah. So I was like, damn. But it did hit me. So at first, yeaah, you're like, just floating. You're like, the game, if you even recognized, which I didn't, cause I just needed a job, I had experience, so it's easy to get. So, I got it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that went on, you know, early twenties, who cares? You know, kind of a thing as far as how it went for me anyway. And then, yeaah, once I hit mid twenties, that's when it started to hit me, woah, like I've been here like two years, years.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nothing, same spot. But, which was fine, cause it's still fun, I'm still young, all this stuff. But, you know, when you hit 25ish, you're kinda like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's four, and they're both two. They have sub-pillars? Okay. No, no, they have partners. They're like partners. Uhm, okay. Uh, health and physical capability are two. Okay. So, and then, so health, physical, uhm, your income, and what you do with your time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So they can, they're kind of partners as well. Interesting, interesting. All your spirituality and your worldview.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, you know, cause a lot of MPs, spiritually that's another, I mean, just you asking that, really.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think just understanding your place in the world. You know how like if you look at the world, just all of existence that you understand as one big puzzle, like where are you in that puzzle? You know, that little piece cause you fit to the pieces next to you somehow. And so how do you fit and how does that puzzle?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Your, your relation, and you brought that up really early, where it's like, uhm, ass kisser, right, like brown nose or whatever, like that, just that idea when you say forming a good relationship, up, up the chain, so you put it in.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're not trying to please them at every moment necessarily. You're trying to build a two way street good relationship. Like anything. So yea, no one, I don't even think brown nosing is building a good relationship.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kiss my ass. Exactly right. And actually you started to say that and I went kinda deep one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then, you know, you'd go into stuff where uhm, what's the expression, a good neighbor, or a good barbeque, I don't know, in the SEAL teams. Like it's like that, that, like you like them, you totally like them, you never do anything mean to this guy, he's so nice, but, is that the relationship you wanna build?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that's what I felt about like brown noses or whatever, no matter how nice they are. So I don't think that's an effective way to build a relationship.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it's not just friends too, like, you know, if you come across a family scenario where, you know, it's revealed to you that, you know, maybe they're not as supportive, you know. Yeah, it's uh, it's bizarre for sure, but it's like kinda spooky. Cause you know, like someone's your friend and maybe, you know,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In, under, under certain circumstance, like you've only been through so many things with them. A lot, for sure, but let's say there's certain circumstances you haven't been in with them, then they get revealed to be, you know, like an easy one, an easy one, like if something good happens to you, like big major life thing, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You bring that up where the courting phase in a relationship, right, dating and that part, the courting part of it, it's like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's that big game that you're talking about, but then there's a couple of maybe two levels of psychological game within the game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, and there are rules, just so, and there are like ways to score and all this other stuff. Like, and it kinda is like an actual game in that way. But it is for the good, it's for the greater good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do you feel like it's like a control thing? Like you know how, and you say this where it's like uhm, a big motivator, if not the biggest motivator for people is controlling their own destiny. So.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] On a, like, for lack of a better term, on a fundamental level, isn't that kind of what it comes down to, like, control? Like, if something, if life is happening to someone, they feel they're not in control. All these bad things and they're not in control. If they were, they wouldn't happen, you know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Of a bunch of things, you're kinda not in control of a bunch of things. For sure. There's things you can't control. Yeaah. And then using the things you can't control to control the situation kind of thing. And usually they're, we're just blind. And I'm trying to think of any situation where I was like unhappy or whatever. It's like you're just more blind to it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's not that they're not there, like the elements you can control. You're just blind to the idea that, hey, you can control this whole thing. And then when you kind of go from there, and this is kind of what I'm kind of, hopefully kind of figuring out, where that's where the ownership comes in. Where it's like, hey, this mistake,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause you start, if you start blaming other people, you automatically kinda relinquish control of everything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Where it's like, hey, this thing messed up, it's not my fault. You know, like, it's too bad, it's like, you know, out of my control, but now everything looking forward is not your control either.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But if you look at it like the opposite way, you're kinda like, oh wait, I can control the outcome, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, but, I also think too, lifting, like bro I can't lift, like how, look, if I have a torn bicep.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I can't do shoulder right, I can't do bent, there's a lot that your biceps do, you know, so in your mind you're like, I can't do any, like, I can't lift. Why even like, what am I gonna do, do half jumping jack? Like, it doesn't make sense. But if you for real think like, hey, no, anything regarding my bicep and any kind of intensity or whatever, sure, we can't control that right now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It'll come back, but we can't control that right now. We're gonna do literally everything else as hard as we can. Bro, you'd be surprised how much good stuff you can get. In fact, you mentioned this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You probably don't know the impact it had on me. It made me feel real good. But remember last time I tore my bicep, the second one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was like, can you even tell? You're like, you're like, oh yeah, I just figured you're, you know, whatever. Like you made a joke first, but then you're like, no, actually I can't really tell at all. Aside from the bandage that I wore from the first week, like you're like, oh I can't even tell.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And when you can't use the bicep at all, for like six months, bruh, it does a lot of like, it shrinks a lot. But!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you do like everything you can, genuinely everything you can, bro, it's like, probably minimal. You see what I'm saying? And that's like a good like, metaphor, whatever, for how it can be, you know? You'd just be surprised how much you can still control, is what I'm saying.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kinda we're in this mode early on and that's when it hit me, it dawned upon me how there's this long term and short term game going on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And there's also, I don't know maybe if this is more, uh, just a different take on the same thing, but there's like a small picture and big picture game going on as well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So it's like, short term, long term, big picture, small picture.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Once you realize that's going on, then you can begin kind of the journey of discovery of how many of that, how many elements in life that applies to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It applies to everything, by the way. But, you don't, you don't, it doesn't land on you till you really realize, okay, this is going on. And then, everything you do, everything you're interested in, everything you say, in a way, is like, that applies to it. Short term, long term, game. Big picture, small picture, game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it's so crazy how if you put things into perspective, it's like, aw man, things become so clear. You know what? We're trickin' distracted. That's a thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause like, you know, okay, you know when you're young, you save money, right? Like, I don't know, you wanna buy a sling shot or something like this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you're like, okay, I gotta save up $12 to buy that slingshot. Boom, you're already aware of the game that you're playing. Short term, long term, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, oh, the Jolly Rancher for sale over there? Bruh, I'm not gonna buy that Jolly Rancher because I'm saving that $1 for this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So you kind of know, that's an example of like knowing the game. But you get distracted, like the Jolly Rancher is like super delicious or something, you know, something like this. Uhm, that's part of the opponent kind of jamming you up. So like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know how entertainment in general, social media, whatever, TV, Netflix, all this stuff, these are all like distractions, trying to distract you from your whatever, your goals, your winning your game or whatever in whatever capacity. But at the same time, it's part of someone else's game to win their game. Same thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is what entertainment is. Okay, in football, there's uhm, there's a lot of, in boxing, there's feints, you know, and all this stuff. So in football, there's like, there's a bunch of different ways, obviously, but there's a play where the quarterback will fake to the fullback and then he'll...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kinda roll out and do some stuff. So social media, Netflix, all that stuff, what that is, is the fake.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They make you like pay attention to that thing while they- and they use you. They totally use you to pay attention to this one thing. Maybe your people on your team are gonna pay attention to you a little bit plus that fake so they're gonna all do what I want them to do while we go do this other thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The big, like, gut full of food. How long between end of the running lifting scenario and the jujitsu? How long in between?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For jujitsu, rash guards, American, all American made stuff. It's a big deal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, JockoStorys called JockoStorys, where you can represent while we're on this path. That's a thing too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Discipline equals freedom. Good, this attitude of, uh, moving on. You know, in the face of adversity, knowing what you can control and what you can't. Guess what the good... mantra.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kinda stands for, nonetheless, you wanna represent, that's where you do it. Also we have a shirt locker, which is a subscription scenario, you want a new shirt every month, different designs, good though.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is Jocko Podcast number 381 with Echo Charles and me, Jocko Willink. Good evening Echo. Good evening.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Also joining us tonight is Kelsey Sharon, who was in the Canadian army. She served in Afghanistan.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And she was actually on this podcast before number 288 and you may notice that podcast number 288 is not actually available because


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This specific operation that we talked about on the podcast because they didn't want some of the details about events that had occurred.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To be revealed to families of the wounded and families of the fallen. There were also some disagreements as to what had happened in combat and specifically to what Kelsey had done and had not done.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so my immediate reaction was just to take down the podcast, uhm, very obviously because the families of the fallen are the priority.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so we took it down, we tried to edit that out. We also tried to edit out some of the contradicting stories of what had occurred in combat. And so we tried to take some of those out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And once it was all edited and caught up in the end.