[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So we can't just have this dominant. So who wants, I'm comfortable taking the emu side.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, who wants to take the lion side? Bates? Brian will. I'm going lion turn, zero chance. I'll jump on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like this, I like the debate. You get to get talked into, you get to get talked into five interesting facts about emus.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, a name whose feathers cannot, cannot be so soft. That's not a good strong.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] An emu has been through it. A lion is like, you know,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like they're, you know, like this is like the prana, like Imu feels like a prana, like it's just like, it's like a velociraptor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like a Velociraptor beat a T-Rex.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, you know, when we had this bracket, you would say there's no way. Yeah. And, and, and the Jurassic park. I don't know the movie.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It did? Yeah, it is at the end. The blue, it beats the one. Well then they fight at the end, but yeah, I think it does at the end.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. I was reading them in some reason that prompted you to go to a different page. They started to get bad.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, emus have a pouch in their throat for communication. Now this is trash talk. I'd imagine some kind of like maybe walkie talkie, maybe the first next tail.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They have a pouch in their throat for communicate, like they don't even waste their time for, what do they put in that pouch? Their phone?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know what it could put in that pouch? A weapon. Right. So now this emu, cause it, look at it. You think it's playing by the rules? There's no playing by the rules. That's cheating. It's an emu cheats.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That anything can happen. So I think an emu has now got a, probably a gun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, right. We're gonna go ahead and say it. The emu brought a gun into this fight. The emu is armed. The emu does have a gun. So the emu gets a gun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause it has a pouch and it can hide it and we did not check the pouch cause we didn't know they had a pouch. Where's a lion putting a gun? Emo's don't have arms, so how's he gonna shoot it? It does it anyway. It has, it's automatic. So look, it's, look at this situation.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What was I saying? The emu, cause when you frisk, look at, you frisk something, you don't ever frisk someone's throat. That's true. So why would you frisk? We would be so busy in the feathers and we don't know that he's got.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That, yeah, that we go like, I cannot believe how not soft this is. You might even cut yourself trying to get the gun out of there. And you're just like shaking it and just like some dust. It looks like you're shaking a, you know, dust is flying out and you're like, I don't think he's good. And we don't even know that in his throat he has a gun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, or to a father whose child was seriously injured by your vehicle while you were backing up. You're like, I'm just trying to be a mailman. No reason is good enough.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How would, who would think there'd be an excuse good enough that you would go as a mailman, you go, I had to go backwards cause a dog was in front of me. They go, all right, that's a pretty decent excuse. Hey, that kid broke his leg, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I didn't realize it was this big of an experiment.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I think the, the post office is like, we're not joking around, dude. Like, do the right, this is literally what it says, do the right thing. Avoid backing up while on your route.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, would you, you would leave the meeting and go, what was the deal with backing up? What's going on out here? Like a kid could sit on his jacket and you would pull it out from under him and it's not a big deal. But I just, I would imagine I'm just going off. If you're a bigger guy, it would be.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You don't do it if it's not possible. That's very funny. You don't do it if they go, it's on you. What's the, could you have that thing pulled up still? I got rid of it now. Oh, it's, what is it saying like, uh, uh, let me just see. The same as big as it goes. Uh, am I back, am I backing up because I'm in a hurry?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Children live and play where you walk around. In the neighborhoods. In the houses you're going to. All it takes is one second for a child to dart behind you as you back up. Only you can avoid back up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that is good. I really like Samuel. Is that one of the names we had? No, we didn't talk about it at all.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I really do like Sam Slay. That's a good name. It's a great name. I think it's going places. And there you go. Uh, that was it. This is the best stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, finally, finally, finally you get it. Uh, so yeah, that was it. And, uh, hope you liked it. I hope you've had a wonderful 4th of July. Uh, we will be here for the next week. Yep. So we'll be back and rolling. We'll be working. Like I said, uh, yeah, the job is still there. Uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I, I don't even know what I'll, I'll be, I'll be close to going to the American, American century, uh, championship, uh, be on NBC. Nice. Yeah. Playing golf on TV. So that's coming up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He'll be there with his son named Georgia.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All right. That's it. We love you and we will see you next week. Bye.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nate Land is produced by Nate Land Productions and by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife Laura on the AudioBoom platform.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land Podcast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nate Land is produced by Nate Land Productions and by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife Laura on the AudioBoom platform. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land Podcast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I, I probably sound, I mean it sounded a little different, but I think people when they first wouldn't notice when they, they, they see them. Visually, I was just looking up in my peripheral vision. I'm like, gosh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's a barghetti, yeaah. It's a barghetti, dead gun barghetti if I've ever seen one. Uh, welcome Hey Bear.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, that was it. That was fun. That was fun. That was very exciting. Added a little something to it. Uh, just trying to make this podcast a little listenable. With a visual gag.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah. Uh, yes, it will be. I think I would have done the Tonight Show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Special comes out. Uh, I will be, uh, cause I'll be gone. So it's like, uh, yeah, yeah. Cause it'll be special be out. Uh, and then, uh, what else is, uh, I'll be at the, doing the Pebble Beach Pro-Am.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Make sure you, if you want to watch that, see how good it goes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But this is the Bill Murray, one Bill Murray's always got. This one's on TV. Yea. What uh, do you know what network it's on?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's on the, like, main ABC, NBC or something or Golf Channel and one of those.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, yeah, it was, uh, yeah, it's on the main, you know, it's what Bill Murray does every year. They do at Pebble Beach and they have the celebrities play with, uh, you play with pros. And so if you're pro, I do not know who my pro is as speaking right now. And I won't know until I don't think that week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Fresh Prince, Alfonso Riviera. Yeaah, he plays in all of them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's uh, Macklemore, Jason Bateman. You can do a practice round so you can sign up so you play a practice round. I signed up with Will and Jason Bateman. We're playing the first group out on a practice round and uh, I put my name in there with them. I don't know them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, yeaah, I don't think you like Jason Bateman.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, Ozark. And that's where he moved to your life. Yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I did not watch, I watched the first season of Ozark and I was kinda done. It's my, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was kind of my Michael Jordan Kobe thing where it was like Breaking Bad and then it went to Ozark and I was like, I can't do this again. It was like too much.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well, I mean, they moved the town to start selling drugs, a guy that doesn't sell drugs or launderers money then moves to a place to launder money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Quality of the show, I get the idea, but it's the same, it's Breaking Bad worked and so they go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're going to make this other one. That's kind of like a laundering. They just laundered money, right? Yea, for the carpet. Yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, yeaah, I don't know, I mean, yeaah, people love Ozark though. I need to get into a mood to wa- and I just haven't been.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I thought it was great. If I would have watched it first, I would have probably been like, Oh, I think it jumped the shark. Okay. All right. Different opinions.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Breaking Bad was like, it was like that idea was like so crazy. And then Ozark is, you know, you're like, alright, I mean you...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then you're kind of like, okay, why? And that's with that one, you're so like, well, they're trying to say he's better than my guy, Michael Jordan, and then you're...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, so. Yeah, there's room for both. No, yeah, there is, but he hits, it just hits the different ages. Yeah. You know, Larry bird guy. Probably exactly right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Different time. Did you listen to it on the radio?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] See, I think it's not bad. I think it's like people like it cause it's like kinda calm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's the, people like the rocking in a rocking chair. That's what you're thinking. It's like just the games on, it's a few hours, just not a lot of.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No. So if you meet a Barghetti, they're in. Alright.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, oh yeaah, my whole life in Nashville. You Ronnie's boy? Still, I mean, it's still very much, it's funny cause you would just try to be, that's all you were asked at the beginning. I mean, and I still get asked that now. Anybody's older, they all go, you Ronnie?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You Ronnie's boy? Like they didn't, they wouldn't know him now. They kind of know me or they know my dad's a magician today. Like there's other Bargettsis, uh, but it's, it was, I mean, it was all Ronnie. Ronnie knows everybody.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but he's who my dad moved down here with. My dad's story, which he's got a great story of him upbringing. My dad got, when he got saved, and uh, he moved from, uh, his dad called Ronnie, and my dad was always kind of in trouble a little bit, and then, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He, my dad moved down to, uh, down to Nashville and lived with Ronnie.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so Ronnie's a big, Ronnie's the best man at my dad's wedding. Ronnie's, so he's my second cousin, but it's, it's a lot more like, yeah. He's like family. Yeah, he's like family.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But it would be like it'd be an uncle or something like that. He's the one that told me about two thumbs bargetti.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When I go, uh, when I did 23andMe, and uh, it said we were 0.0 Italian, I told Ronnie Barghetti that, and he goes, that's not true.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because we are, we are families from, like, Italian, Switzerland, like there's like a, up there, kind of towards the top of Italy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He was saying I had no Italian in me, but it's like, we do. It's our family, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're just sending, you're spitting in a tube. I totally believe that. I'm just, that's what you're guessing happened. Yeah. I mean, I think, I don't know, maybe it didn't swab it all right. I mean, we have to, I don't know. I, we have, you know, the way we look is definitely more Italian look. I get very like in the summer, like I get very dark. I get very, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Some hair on my back. Orange. Little orange hands. Little orange, I have orange hands. It's Italian.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, I don't like tomatoes and onions. That's the, that's the American part of me. I don't care for the vegetables. So I was born here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He goes, before Columbus, way before Columbus, and you were specifically even at Lebanon. Like it was, it was not Lebanon, but your family started here at Lebanon.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We love HelloFresh since we are so busy. It makes the dinner decision easy a few days, easy a few days a week. We are doing it tonight.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Looking for an easy way to eat, right? And save money this year, cut back on expensive takeout and delivery and get served with HelloFresh. It is good because I, I do with my calories, it shows the calories on it. That's gigantic. Uh, you know, it tastes good. I eat out so much that I have


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do not go to the grocery store and instead take control of your time and budget with delicious recipe delivered right to your door. That is why it's America's number one milk kit. It is. You go to the grocery store, you're not going to stay healthy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Food preferences and plan size or skip a week whenever you need to. We have been using Elvrest for five years or more. Uh, it helps cut out stressful meal planning by us, Laura.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It helps Laura cut out stressful meal plans, if I'm being honest. But it's nice she put us in there. Since no one in a marriage can decide what to eat for dinner.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Go to HelloFresh.com slash NateLand21.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And use code NATELAND21 for 21 free meals.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's a lot. That is 21 free meals plus free shipping at hellofresh.com slash nateland21. Use code nateland21. America's number one meal kit. Meal. I don't know if I say that right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they have to, you would think to make a meal, you would need a place that does make meals. Yea, a meal. Right? A meal meal. A meal meal. I don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They've been trying to shut that meal mill down forever. Why? Well, people don't like meals. And then, so we go, can't shut all these meals down. So I go, what about the place that makes the meals?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, that's a pretty good idea. The meal meal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This week, y'all don't have to wait, you know, we're pre-recorded this. Y'all ain't been doing nothing. Uh, comments, Paul Bickel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Recently, I played a board game with family and friends called Confident. My wife became less and less amused when I would-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Have correct answers and continually cite my source, NateLand.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The categories included the Olympics, physics, the universe, decades, eras of history, and even how many Oscar nominations Meryl Streep had. Even after the game was over, my wife asked me if I had heard of the new movie Cocaine Bear. And again, you received the credit. Look at that. Wow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, it is educational. That guy learned something. He remembers more than I did.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, yeaah. Go to the Jupiter side. Yeaah. Uhm, is all the planets, are they just in a straight line? No.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, but what if it's you spinning?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now we're talking. There you go. They spun and the earth was, and that's how they countered it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They might have put that. Someone else might have put that. Cause I mean, Pluto went away.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. When did they, cause Pluto went away and they said it's not a planet. And then now it's a planet. We have a picture of it now? Well, it never went away.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Classified as a planet. Cause it's a dwarf planet.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Noy, Noyal Jones. Noyal, right? Yea. I like that name. Noyal. What's your name, Noyal?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Noyle Jones. I'm a fan. I thought you would have said Noly. Noly. I bet it is Noly. I don't know, but. Noly Jones. Noyle. I like Noyle. Yea, Noyle. I hope it's Noyle.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ben Rosser, the news of Nate meeting Tiger is unreal. And Michael Jordan, that is my dream foursome golf group to play with. Curious. Curious.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm curious as to what Nate's dream foursome would be. Uh, it's probably those two, Tiger and Jordan.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You got one more. Hmm. Tiger, Jordan. Bring Bates. I would say this foursome right here. Yeah, this would be a dream foursome. Uh, I mean, just, I could get my own car. Us three have to ride together? Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, I would say Tiger Jordan. Trying to think who else would be. Those are golfers. I'd want to be a golfer. I mean, you could, uh. Tom Brady? Uh, no.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, uh, trying to think like football about, uh, you know, like another. Yeah. I mean, he'd be, he'd be those interesting, like that would be, you know, like a crazy one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what I always think, like, when people lose their mind like that, and you're famous.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, Derek was just here. I mean, Derek golfs. He's going to be the caddy. I think he'd probably enjoy it. And he goes, Oh yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like, I guess it would be, I guess I would try to be that, but it's, you know, I'd have to be the one trying to get out of it. Is this living?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Living or dead or is this just- I'm saying living. Yeah, I'm saying living. You got Bob Costas there or somebody?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just to facilitate? Yeah, someone that's like, just keep it moving, like, let's keep it, you know, alright, you know, Tom Cruise could be fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then we'd all be very close. You'd be on a spaceship. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Michael Jordan would be good. I bet Michael Jordan would be tough though to like, meeting Tiger.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Was like, I think you could get a lot of like, it seemed like he, he was awesome when I met him. So Tiger would be fun to deal now. I think Jordan would be.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it would be, Jordan would be a lot, I think, to play with. Like, you'd be like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's exhausting. And you'd want to talk to Tiger. If you had them two, they might be pulling each other away. So then you'd want to, you're like, all right, well, who do I want to, so I'd probably choose Tiger.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then I don't know if I bring in Jordan because if I'm trying to get the most out of it, maybe I do Tiger and Tom Cruise. And then I'm a comedian. I'm me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. Alright, alright. Meryl Streep? Meryl Streep. It's a fun question, Ben. Get a Tom Hanks in there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, yeaah, Tom would be nice. Tom would sit, uh, Tom Hanks would be someone that's like, I'll sit wherever you guys want me to sit. You go, yeaah, you go sit in another movie, Tom?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Tiger's the only reason he might watch this guy, he's on the, he's the only existence of God. I go, right, dude, don't you think he's too much everywhere?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sarah Sweeney, just to clarify, do you prefer the Hey Bear, Let's Go Folks, and Yee Yees in the beginning, or can they be thrown out in the middle of a set if it applies? No middle.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, uh, yeah, I like it when you walk out and then after that, let's just do the show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Remy, Remy, they go, uh, that name Remy, yeah, Remy versus, they go Remy, they go Remy. They go, all right, I got it. Oh, that's tough. All right. Give me your last name.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Verox-tasty state. Verox state.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's Verogue straight. Verogue straight. I recently watched a few Seinfeld interviews where he talks about


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The importance of a daily writing habit. And he shows some of his early early jokes handwritten on a yellow legal pad. Do you write all your jokes? Do you write out your jokes? Do you write every day or just jot down ideas when they come to you? Interested to get a little behind the scenes insight into how the magic happens.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, I write it just as they come, like kind of just, I'm kind of all day just like mining for stuff. And so you kind of just put it in your phone and I'll think about it. I need to, I think I need to start a writing habit now. I don't ever do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, you just gotta look up like joke, you know, stuff that, ideas. I don't know if I, I don't have a system. I wish I had a system. You have a system?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What do you write every day? I try to. What do you do? You just sit with a paper or a computer?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do you sit and when you go write and try to come up with ideas, do y'all just do the free writing or do you do the...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Did you ever do that? Does anybody know? Free writing is you just supposedly just start typing your thoughts.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So you're, the idea, I, I write, I don't know if people know this, but it's like, you would be like, I'm sitting at this table talking about writing. I can't think of anything. I don't know what to, and you just keep doing that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's the, that's the, the, the hard part with writing out word for word.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's anytime I would do it, I have a hard time remembering it if I do that. And you're actually going to punch it up more than you if you do it the other way. And so it works in like monologue style or like that kind of stuff where it just can become too punchy because you're


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're writing it out so you have time to punch it up. And when you do that, you're like, well now you're kind of not talking like how people talk.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Even if you write yours out, there's gotta be some, you got some leeway. But I mean, I noticed when I would do it, it was like, well, I don't even, I won't even talk like this. Yeah. And then, and then you're also just throwing in so many jokes. It's the, yeah, right now I have trouble with like, I, it's like just ideas.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think I have trouble with right now's ideas just cause it's like I've been so busy and it's like I'm not going to get to really do anything. That's been my problem.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, he did a gas station. It's not bad though. I enjoy it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I can, yeaah, I mean I can, I'll go two rows to go out if it's empty. Right. Yeaah. I'll sit there and yeaah, yeaah, I'm with you. Uh, well, you're nimble now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's a good word. I'm floating around. William Byrne.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I could listen to an entire episode of Aaron just riffing on what kind of person he thinks Dusty is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So far, he has mentioned that Dusty seems like the type of guy who uses the wind to tell direction.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He wears full pajamas with a sleeping hat and eats sugar cubes now and then instead of candy. Now and then instead of candy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I don't think it's like carpet at your house. It's like that carpet like, you know, like basketball.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When you watch other comics, do you translate the joke into something clean? Do you think, do you think that...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Could have been clean just as funny if it was done like this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And there are times where you would suggest a clean version to a close comedian friend. I realize that your objective is not convert, is not convert other comics, but I'm interested to see if you have any thoughts about other people's bits.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The only one I would say are not someone specifically, but there's times where you can tell, you're like, well the joke would be clean if you just didn't curse in it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So there's, you definitely see comics where you're like, I mean, they could just, that would be a clean joke and they're just cursing for no reason. Or, you know, for whatever, maybe that's how they talk, but it's, uh, yeah, you could do that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I would, you know, I think there's been times where people were, where it's like you're, yeah, if you're close enough, some of it, I mean, look, uh, you know, the specials we're going to be putting out, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which, uh, uh, not positive, but they should be, they're becoming, I'm hoping to come out sometime in March. Vecions. And, uh, I'll give you a big, big, let everybody know when he's coming. But like, Vecions was like,


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[Assistant] You know, it's like, Vic Young was already basically clean, you're like, you could, you know, and when he comes on the road with me, it's like, yeaah, you can just be, you know, he was not that dirty.


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[Assistant] But he's got dirty, he does have dirty stuff, but he was basically clean and it was like, so he is, he had plenty to be like, yeah, you could do a special. You're not gonna lose much. You're not gonna, he's not gonna lose anything. And then, so it's, uh, there's that aspect to it where you can just go, yeah, that is a need.


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[Assistant] This, or you can, you can, you know, yeaah. Yes, but I, it's.


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[Assistant] There are, there's times where I've seen jokes where you go like, that's basically a clean joke. They can make clean and I don't know why they're cursing. Uh, you know, unless it's just the way they talk.


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[Assistant] Cause some guys just, some guys are cursed. You go to New York, I mean, they just, you know, not all New Yorkers, but when I was in, you know, a lot of people in New York, I mean, they just, they curse and they don't even, everybody's cursed. Their parents are cursed.


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[Assistant] It's, you know, people are getting so conversational now that it's like they, they, you know, it's when they,


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[Assistant] Use it when they're cursing just to be, you can tell it's like they're trying to think of the next thing. And then you're like, I mean, there's no.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're just using it as saying like. It's like saying, uh, yeah.


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[Assistant] Carl Boynton. Uh, Noel Boynton. That'd be a fun one.


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[Assistant] And I placed this question on one of my quizzes for my team sports class. I'm not sure if this is more of a bash on Tom Brady or if this student truly sees the impact that Nate has had on the game of football. Either way, he missed it.


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[Assistant] I think they read it, yeaah, he probably read it, probably dyslexic. He read it backwards, which in these visuals had the biggest impact on the game of football.


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[Assistant] Heather Waldridge. I feel Dusty's pain in terms of pocket knives being denied.


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[Assistant] I always have a knife in my purse. While I was in the restroom, there was a lady that has not


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[Assistant] That had not taken the tag off her dress. It was one of the cotton string tags so I couldn't just pull it off her. I said hold on I have a knife and pulled my crazy


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I pulled my crazy knife out of it. No, I pulled my knife out of my purse. Her and her friend's eyes got real big and they looked at me like I was crazy, but I was able to cut the stranger's tag off her dress. Heather Waldridge.


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[Assistant] Yeah, just kinda yank it. I grab what I can grab. I'm like a planet. That's how planets were made.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, just pulling stuff down. Gravitational pull to the middle.


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[Assistant] Maybe I'm picturing her until then I thought pulled my crazy knife out.


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[Assistant] It goes, yeah, it's just me rocking. Bates just sitting there just every now and again, hitting the pencil.


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[Assistant] Throwing out random 80's era WWF stars. I'd be interested in knowing who he thinks would be on the Mount Rushmore of WWF. Not WWE. Now WWF.


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[Assistant] No, he's it. He's the one that made it. He transcended. It became mainstream.


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[Assistant] He could maybe. He's impact like Jordan.


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[Assistant] Hulk Hogan is like Jordan Tiger. Like if you talk, if you never think about it, cause you just don't think about wrestling. But if you went down and said, all right, what, who are the most famous people or whatever? And it would be, you know, you could be like Babe Ruth, Hulk Hogan, I mean, Babe Ruth, Muhammad Ali.


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[Assistant] Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods, uh, Hulk Hogan. Hulk Hogan is, I mean, I mean, yeah, as big as you get. Yeah.


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[Assistant] It's just a name. It's so much that you know him that I don't even know if people might even think if he's a real thing or not. It's just like a word you know.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's interesting. You could, like, you know everything about Hulk Hogan, but Hulk Hogan is...


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[Assistant] He could sit at a table with all of them and be like, y'all don't even, he's Elvis.


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[Assistant] I don't think Stone Cold, I don't think Stone Cold reached Hogan's. Maybe not, maybe not. You could say The Rock is as famous as him now, but it wasn't because of Rex. Hulk Hogan was the, the most mainstream. I mean, he was, it was, uh, it just didn't get bigger than that.


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[Assistant] And he came back and then it's like, yeah. Joe Tuanin.


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[Assistant] My son and I have an ongoing argument. I think that if ants were as intelligent as humans on average, on average that the ants would be able to take over humans and kill them all. There are 2.5 million ants per one human and they are strong.


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[Assistant] My son disagrees and thinks humans would be able to take them out. What do you think?


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[Assistant] Two and a half million to one, your entire bot, I mean, like, that means, let's say it takes


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[Assistant] I didn't know it would take half a million to cover your whole body. How many do you think it would take? Just say if it's 500,000 ants, it covers your entire body.


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[Assistant] Like they could crawl in your body. That means it's out of every human, there's four kind of things that go.


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[Assistant] No, I think they had to fight right now. I think they had to win. We're all equal. We're equal now. They've learned as long as we've learned. And tomorrow's the ant versus human war.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So if there's one, if there's whatever the math of that is. So, uh, two and a half million ants to one person. But it only takes 500,000 ants to cover one person.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but I mean, when you're, they're on top of each other, it's a, it's not going to be like it's a single layer. I think, I think it's like a thick layer on top of you.


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[Assistant] Two million ants they could sacrifice on a person. That just like, it doesn't matter.


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[Assistant] They just get inside of your body and like, what are you going to do? Gash your body. So what if you lose a hundred thousand? You never know where they're at. I mean, there could be, you could have 10,000 of them just underneath your bed. You wouldn't know. But could they survive?


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[Assistant] But even if you go spray a garage, you were in this business, you can't get rid of them. They don't just go, that's it.


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[Assistant] Yeah, but they're as smart as us. So they're going to know, alright, I know what they're about to go do. And you just can't see them. You just can't see them. I like this conversation.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, there's just two and a half million to one. I mean, do the math on that. What's how many people on earth? It's just past eight billion, right? So do eight billion and then what's times two and a half million? I have it here. It's like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, 20 quadrillion is not even a number. It's like, it's so much that it's not even, and it's just the sheer force. I mean, just think of it, you had to fight two and a half million ants.


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[Assistant] Okay. You in a room with two and a half million ants.


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[Assistant] Yeah. You think you can beat two and a half million ants? I think so.


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[Assistant] They're as smart as anything that you can think of, they can think of. So just remember that. I would say give me- So they get, they could figure out talking or they could figure out like-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So there's two and a half, so just think about those. There's more of those, cause each ant, there's two and a half million ants to a person.


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[Assistant] I mean, there's- They have the giant Amazonian ants.


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[Assistant] They, uh, 1.2 to 1.6 inches in total body length.


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[Assistant] Yeah, that's what I mean, like you gotta realize.


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[Assistant] These ants, I mean two and a half million ants came in this house right now. It would be, it'd be a big problem. And then you go outside.


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[Assistant] And they're just two and a half million there. There's nowhere for you to go. Right. You're just always running into two and a half million ants. You have to go in the air. You just go in there, but like, you would, but it's.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It would wipe out, I mean, if this was a movie, the first 30 minutes of movie is just, it's killing half the population. Just cause you don't even know what's happening. So if you're lucky and survive, it's going to be a pretty good movie.


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[Assistant] I mean, just unlimited supply of sticky traps and, you know.


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[Assistant] Oh, the head is on their body. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.


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[Assistant] Like our head is on our body, saying they don't have...


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[Assistant] Their eyes are just a part of their, like, chest. Yeah, that's what I'm trying to say. Like if our, their eyes were just, if we had eyes just in our chest. Yeah, just right here.


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[Assistant] I mean right there dude, that's not even, right there tells you that's your answer.


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[Assistant] Because they used it in a war, so they would have been, so you're, and these are dumb fleas. These are not smart animals.


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[Assistant] Fleas that don't know anything. And they killed 400,000 people. We're talking about ants that are smart. That are like flying the plane.


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[Assistant] And they make a body. And then they, they all start talking.


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[Assistant] Yeah, but you are going to have that because they have the smarts of us. I think ants, if they even tried at being dumb ants, they could do it.


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[Assistant] Cause it worked with this flea thing. Why do we never hear that?


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[Assistant] So if you killed someone, you could put them in a bunch of ants. Oh yeaah. It'd be, take a while.


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[Assistant] Your entertainment was just putting your hand in a pile of ants.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I mean I think ants are in the same boat, but it's, yes, mosquitoes you can't even see. Yeah.


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[Assistant] We'd make special glasses. I bet that's the first thing you'd have to do.


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[Assistant] And then you wouldn't want to, what? Citronella everywhere.


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[Assistant] You know what I just thought of in my head? If your name was Bill, it wouldn't be, it'd make sense too. Me? I don't know why. Yeah. Bill Bates. Bill Bates. I think I thought of it. It's the reason in my head I thought, if you were a Bill, you'd be like, yeah, yeah. I don't know if I see another Aaron. Like it's like, this makes sense. And then you're the one that you're like, you could be Bill too.


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[Assistant] Hey, you played, uh, won a Superbowl. Oh, played in Superbowl.


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[Assistant] Show some respect. As a coach, as a player, so he was at, he was there, the Cowboys when the Cowboys were the Cowboys. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. From Farragut. What county is that in? Knox County.


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[Assistant] Yeah. Oh, he's in Knoxville. High school Farragut.


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[Assistant] Undrafted, undrafted too. He still played 15 seasons. We're overachievers. That's what we do. Oh, Bill Bates. Oh, Bill Bates.


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[Assistant] That's how you sign it. Give me five more dollars, I'll give you the A. I don't know, I didn't have the money on me.


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[Assistant] I mean, out of all the stuff that I've said in my life, and I've, and I've, I've topped it off, I don't know if I ever thought a scorpion was a reptile. I don't even know how you would think that. I don't know. What do you think it is?


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[Assistant] Definitely just not a reptile and you can go from there. You can start it from there. No, it's not a reptile.


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[Assistant] Okay, that's what I'm saying, they just throw live scorpions in there? Yeah, but I don't think they're grabbing in their hand, like they're putting them in something.


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[Assistant] Three years. Bregi, I want to get used to it.


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[Assistant] You know, like you just get like, you don't even, like you're feeling maybe a tenth of what you're actually getting.


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[Assistant] I don't even know how you could survive now, that's an argument for the other side.


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[Assistant] For the, for the, uh, humans being ants. Cause if a guy can survive that for three years.


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[Assistant] I heard they got a guy over there, prison bug, prison over there, and he goes, you hear it, that other guy broke him out, dead gun, gotta throw him in there too. And he goes, you want another one? What's an L House?


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[Assistant] And you just, as you walk around, you, you know, you walk in, maybe you don't work there. You sit next to him and he goes, did you hear about that bug prison? And he goes, yeah, guy got out. I threw that guy in and got him out. There's two guys over there. Can you believe that? Can you believe that?


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[Assistant] Even if it was light, I don't think you're.


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[Assistant] Does any, any word on that? I mean, back then, you know, who knows? Looked at, like painted the wrong house. Stole some mail. It didn't take much. Yeah. You were going into a bug prison.


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[Assistant] If there's a bug prison in your town, you're probably going to go in it. I don't think anybody that puts a bug prison in place is rational.


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[Assistant] Fruit flies are about the most, one of the most frustrating. Yeaah.


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[Assistant] Mosquitoes are very frustrating too, and then, uh. Deal with a lot of fruit flies? You just, when you deal with them, and when you, when you are amongst them, it's, you gotta leave the place.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Go eat at a restaurant. That's right. I mean, that's where I'm dealing with them. Go eat at a restaurant. I just ate at a restaurant this weekend and there was fruit flies.


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[Assistant] Uh, where, I mean they just come out of nowhere and they like dive bomb you and you're just like, you're just having to swipe it. Is that just a fly?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, it's like a gnat. But it's like, they're always, you always said fruit flies because they're, they would always be by the, the bar. They had like the lemons and limes and all that. There'd be fruit flies.


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[Assistant] So like by where they keep, put all the stuff, you know, little cherries. Yeah. And then there's just fruit flies will be over there. And you'd always be, it's just like, they're annoying. Like, you know,


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[Assistant] I, I agree. I, I mean I, why would ya? If that, that's insane.


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[Assistant] You think they sell fleas? Where are you getting 200,000 fleas? Some lab somewhere. You breed them in a lab, yeaah. Some scientist said we're


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[Assistant] He's also one of the scientists that's the, well, I'm a scientist. You go, yeah, but you're...


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[Assistant] Oh, are we at war with Savannah, Georgia?


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[Assistant] And that's where you were at channel 5 and he goes, you know, they dropped Coward Pills, just...


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[Assistant] I don't know, I mean any time, you still gotta go, when were they gonna


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[Assistant] I mean, this, look what the government's already done dropping bugs and now you're going, I think their message just got better going, no, we're doing it for the opium.


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[Assistant] And then you want to be like, are you? And it's not worked. If they did it.


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[Assistant] And always going higher. The hard part about the people that will work pesticide is there's the people that don't believe in pesticide, but you ain't gonna get another job inside of a building, you know?


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[Assistant] Yeah, that is a guy that's willing.


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[Assistant] To spray just stuff around his body, smell it, all that, you.


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[Assistant] Their first goal is to take over us and then they can, then they...


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[Assistant] Then they, they run the world and then from there it's the inner, but they have, they have the same bond. We have unity. They have the same bond. That's true.


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[Assistant] They have crops and stuff like that. Like, I mean, I don't know if we're creating, like it's like everything will just grow up and then they're just eat the grass.


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[Assistant] I mean that's so many. It's eight, it's eight, eight, and it's just, it's an unimaginable number. It's a lot. Twenty, like,


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[Assistant] Yeaah. I always thought, do we, we might talk about this one, if you could have, if you could pick to have a penny of anything, what would you say? But I was, I would say grain of sand.


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[Assistant] Cause then you'd have an unimaginable number, but you could say ants and be like, you're doing good.


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[Assistant] You're doing good. You're doing great if you're 20 quadrillion. Yeah, at $40.


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[Assistant] If they told you to do this, if someone said, alright, a genie comes and goes, you get a penny of anything, and first guy goes, humans. The second one's like, uh, grain of sand. You're like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause then you're back to as poor as you just were. If they give you, here's your 80 million dollars and then they go, here's your quadrillion dollar. You're like.


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[Assistant] I mean, get out of here. You're 80 million. Like you won't, you'll be poor. You ain't be there. Ask for stuff. Yeah. 80 million. Nothing.


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[Assistant] But I, but I wonder if each of, I mean, you just sit there just going, you have $80 million. You're like, you know people that have $80 million. Like you would, there's people that have $80 million. That guy.


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[Assistant] Yeah, but you go, that guy could be like, I'll give you a trillion dollars, just quit talking. And then, and then he wouldn't even notice that's gone. Yeah. Cause he is 80 quadrillion.


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[Assistant] Yeah. And go, I wish I would have thought about that. I didn't know we could say grain of sand. I would have said, you know, stars. I would have said something like that.


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[Assistant] I was trying to be nice, you just gotta complain enough.


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[Assistant] Yeah. You gotta give the taxes. Yeah. You could probably just, yeah, you would just be like, nah, you could just buy an arm. You just go, I'm not going to pay taxes on it.


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[Assistant] Yeah, the world. I mean, you just go, I'll, I'll pay, you know, you could probably pay people a million dollars to do.


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[Assistant] If you can look up the schedule of the ferry, they can look up the schedule. They go to a laptop and type it in? No, they, they can go wait for a ferry. They just take over the boat. I don't think they're waiting in line. Like, I don't think they're just going.


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[Assistant] Wikipedia. They're us smart. I would say they're just equally as smart as us. So it's us versus them. It's like human brains and ant bodies. Human brains and ants.


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[Assistant] That's tough. There's just so many, but they're that little. So that's the, that's the thing.


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[Assistant] It's a good day, yeaah. It's a good day. You live the life that you've been given.


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[Assistant] Well, that's why they can make all the noise in the back and those legs. That's why their legs get, they get going. You ever seen the front of a grasshopper? It's like a drunk. The back's like, come on man, get it together.


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[Assistant] Being an insect has got to be just a panic of just every day is like.


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[Assistant] Yeah, but there, but the unity that we have that you're saying we would have over that, they would have that over us.


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[Assistant] We've been doing way more to dance than they've done to us for years. So they're going to be mad.


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[Assistant] I don't think they're going to be a perfect unit. Yeah. So say a billion of them have egos and they fight it off.


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[Assistant] Still 20 quad, say a quadrillion of them. There's still 19 quadrillion. So I mean, like, it's just, you know, like.


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[Assistant] And they, but it's like the military, so like they're militarized. So they come from a military background. So it's like, so it is the, we have the egos because you're like, we're not, if we were all in the military, I think it'd be much different, but we're not.


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[Assistant] So everybody's coming from all these different things. The ants are very militarized. You wake up, it's like this is what time we get up, everybody, alarm goes off.


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[Assistant] I think there could be an alignment. I think it would be about, hey, we need to get rid of these humans. And then maybe there's a point where they go, we could use these humans to get rid of the ants that become a problem.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. And just think the breeding of them when there's no threat of, I mean, it's just 20 quadrillion becomes 40 quadrillion overnight. Yeah. Imagine though that they're doing it with purpose.


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[Assistant] But if they, if, if, if we knew something was the reason we were gonna die, then there, we would unite because we, none of us wanna die. So like ants could, if they get it, they go like, we're not gonna, they're, they,


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[Assistant] We have to know the answer as smart as we are. So we go, we gotta, we gotta fix this ant thing. And they're like, they're coming after us. So we have to take over.


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[Assistant] Cause then just like that they become smarter. So then they're like, well, they're, they don't.


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[Assistant] They, you know, every morning we jog. AG1. AG1, we jog, we do stuff like that. Yeah. Maybe. Yeah.


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[Assistant] All right. That was a fun one. That was a fun one. Uh, all right, so this is, uh, next, so this comes out, uh... Next week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah. Jadrid31st, Amazon Prime.


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[Assistant] It will be, I don't know the time, so I don't know what Amazon does. You know, I know, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Netflix does like 3 a.m. or something like that, or midnight like Pacific, uh, 3 a.m. Eastern. So I don't know what Amazon does. So, uh, I should know soon what time it's gonna come out, uh, but, uh, January 31st, uh, Amazon Prime,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's exciting. Yeah, it'll be good. You'll see a little Derek in it.


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[Assistant] You saw earlier. Well, Derek and Abigail.


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[Assistant] Make an appearance. Alright. Uh, so. What about your, what about your son?


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[Assistant] For how much we were having to bring.


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[Assistant] Uh, so we're still going to be, we still, you can still buy merch and do all that stuff. Uh, we just haven't been doing it live at shows. That, that didn't really make sense at the moment. Uh, so, but, uh, neighbor auntie, hello world, amazon, prime video. Uh, and yeah, uh, so go, it's the big one. So go check that out. Awesome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, all right, as always, uh, and Joe and his son, solid question. We didn't talk about the ant thing the whole time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, we love you, and uh, yeaah, have a good week, and see you next week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nate Land is produced by Nate Land Productions and by me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nate Bargetzi. And my wife Laura on the AudioBoom platform. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land Podcast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So there's a regional in Pittsburgh and it's, it's not in the city, but


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[Assistant] The Saturday, you know, a group of little people were like, let's go and see downtown Pittsburgh.


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[Assistant] So this one girl, she has a new minivan. Alright? We're all little people. Her dad just bought this new, brand new, beautiful minivan. Accessible van.


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[Assistant] You know, very expensive. So we go into downtown Pittsburgh and everyone's drinking, you know, and, and I'm not cause, you know, it's early and I was just tired. So the girl whose minivan it is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She only had like one beer, but she was like, I probably shouldn't drive.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was like, I'll drive, you know, I'm fine. You know? And so now we're on the fourth floor of a parking garage that is on a very heavy, steep incline, okay? Fourth floor down. And so I get in, very confident, okay? I'm a good driver.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I, I start the car and I, and I, you know, put it, I put my foot on the brake now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I put it in reverse. Now what happens is the pedal extension


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That I, along with these other five innocent little people, just smashed and destroyed all these cars.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That girl, um, you know, I see her all the time, but a couple years ago, she's like, you know, we're still paying off for that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's a lot of twos by the way, they've really.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Through the end of October 3rd. Oh no, that's quarter 3.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ma'am, uhm, hey we got a couple envelopes here for you and is that your son? Yeah. Lying in the street out there? Yeah. Cause I don't think he's alive. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I watched it this weekend in my hotel room. It was David Battista and, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you mock me, I can't think of your name right now, but they just take turns. He'll ask her a question, then ask him a question, then they interact together. You tell her how you watched Halloween in a drive-in theater.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is it the same kids as last year? Probably, yeaah. You should require them to have a meet and greet pass to see you this year.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, Leann Morgan, who also grew up in Robertson County, said that that's a big tobacco county and they would, the high school boys would be out for weeks when tobacco season was going on because they gotta do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thursday night I was in Maryville, Tennessee doing a show for uh, True Purpose Ministries. I was at a church there and it's uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Addiction Recovery Center and they had a singer right before me. I had a follow singer. I'm like, all right, I can have this guy. This guy was also a preacher. So in between every song, he'd be really putting in some.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm like, this is getting tougher and tougher. People are getting into it. And at the end, his last song, he said, let's just get everybody up here who's went through the recovery program, who's now


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, I mean, he's got a powerful story too. He's an addict that's recovered and now all these people are, you know, and they show a little video and it's pretty powerful and then I get up there and...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They were still, they weren't there. They weren't there. I saw you, you went to the tallest or what is it? The biggest little skyscraper.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The word jogging's kind of left our vocabulary. Nobody uses that word anymore. What's the word?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Babbel is the language learning app with more than 10 million subscribers. If you got a new travel experience coming up, Nate's getting ready to go to Europe, you're getting ready to go to South America, uh, Babbel is the way to go. It's fun, it's easy, bite-sized language lessons. You can feel confident no matter where the new year takes you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] With Babbel, you only need 10 minutes to complete a lesson, so you can start having real life conversations in a new language. Little as three weeks, guys. Three weeks, Dusty. Other language learning apps use AI for their lesson plans. Babbel uses 150 language experts. Over 150.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Many languages to learn, many ways to learn through Babbel. Right now get up to 55% off your subscription when you go to babbel.com slash nate. That's babbel.com slash nate for up to 55% off your subscription. Babbel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It kind of be like Deep Blue, remember when it played Garry Kasparov in chess and the first time the world chess champion, he beat it pretty bad, but it kept getting better and better and learning more and it finally was better than he was.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It'd be like telling a professional athlete, can you believe you were just out there on the field playing that game? And they're like, yeah, but I got another game next week. If I get too wrapped up in it, I ain't gonna be able to perform. It's a long season. Which I'm not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We talked about this a little bit when you were gone, cause you watch a restaurant show where they... Restaurant Impossible. And Aaron said that the one thing they always do is simplify the menu. Yeah. Cause it makes it better. Just focus on what you do well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'd say you and I are probably more mainstream country. Kenny Chesney, that's a big one for you. I love Kenny Chesney.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The country just blew up in the early 90s and that's when I was in college and Garth Brooks played the Murphy Center at MTSU where I went to school and I stood in line and got me and


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Those examples, people were coming from all over to go, that was a big deal. But I would go to an MTSU basketball game where there was, you know, a couple thousand people in them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The crazy thing, Nashville has so many venues now to see, uh, see music, but then there was the municipal auditorium, which still exists downtown Nashville and it's like a relic. They still do shows.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But then MTSU's Murphy Center, people would have to go to Murphysboro to see a big show. Really? Because that's where the judge did like their farewell tour and there was no Bridgestone Arena.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, but who were like your biggest country music, were you into country music as a kid? I was not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It, it, I guess I'm saying the 90s, it became like a cool thing. Like it wasn't just like the, you know, everybody listened to it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I, yeaah, I mean I love it. I googled the most best selling albums of all time and every chart would tell me something a little different, but according to Wikipedia, Shania Twain, come on over, is the 7th greatest selling album of all time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Huge. She's one of the best selling of any country artist. Isn't she from Canada?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A couple years ago, it was climbing the charts, country, Billboard's Hot Country song, got number 19, they took it off the charts because they said this isn't real country.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay. And it started in Bristol. Well, it started in Appalachian mountains. It was called Hillbilly music. And then after a while they're like, eh, let's maybe call it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So uhm, in 19, uh, 25, this, I act like I'm gonna try to remember all this, this insurance company, Nashville. You went to your first show at M.T.S.U.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, the National Life and Accident Insurance Company, uh, bought a radio station to promote their, uh, I guess insurance and they do live radio shows and, and, uh, their motto was We Shield Millions. So they call the radio station WSM. And, wow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Still the radio station. And they did a show called WSL barn dance, where they just played country music. And then one night right before it, they were doing opera. And when the guy came on for the barn dance show, he said, you've been listening to opera, but now you're listening to going to listen to some grand old Opry.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then, uh, the Grand Ole Opry kept growing. It was at the Belcourt Theater for a while, here in Nashville. And they kept outgrowing that. What does it show there?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, we did it. I think I've done a thing there too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah. That's right. But then we did one with Kenny and his friends. Uh, then it moved to East Nashville for a while and it kept getting bigger.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, so it kept, Grand Ole Opry kept on without growing it. They moved it to the War Memorial Auditorium, which is still doing shows in Nashville. And then finally into the Ryman. They started charging people to get in, because it kept getting bigger and bigger. And then, uhm, it just kept growing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, just a couple of things. Elvis played the Opry and they didn't like his dress, the way he was dressed. So they, they're like, you're not a good fit for us. He did do it though. Yeah, as a teenager. And, uh. Judges in his house.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I guess so. I don't know if that was just the music video that they pulled him over or, or.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. He was called No Show Jones for a while, cause...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So the Ryman did not have air conditioning, so they're doing all these shows and...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just in the heat. And by the late 60s, the Ryman was kind of getting run down and the Opry is so big that there's still not enough space. The Ryman holds like 2,300 I think. So uhm, they were like, let's build a bigger, more modern out of, and downtown Nashville then was pretty run down and just a lot of


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not what it is today for sure. So like, let's go out to find some land out of downtown Nashville, build us a new Grand Ole Opry house, bigger, more modern. And then the president of the Grand Ole Opry was in Houston and he went to the Astro Dome and I guess there they have Astro World where they got a bunch of other stuff going on too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So he's like, let's do more than just the Grand Ole Opry House. Let's build a theme park year round. So that's where he came up with the idea for Opryland. Yeah. So Opryland and the Grand Ole Opry House both opened in the early seventies.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's great. Yeah. When Lauren Elena and uh, John Crist and some other people there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think so. Cause that song was remade recently. Dottie West is an older. Yeah, Dottie West did that song. Okay. Uhm, well she's from McMinnville. Yeah. So. It's Dottie West Highway leading out there. So you might replace it someday, right? Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She was, uh, on her way to the Opry and her car broke down and I always got through some bad news in here. And, uh, her neighbor saw her and he was an older gentleman and he said, I'll give you a ride. 81 years old. I'll give you a ride to the Opry. And she said, well,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I explore it because I'm running late and, uh, on the way there off the Bradley Parkway, the ramp there off Bradley Parkway, he was going 55 miles an hour and lost control and wrecked.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And at first, they didn't think she was hurt. So she said, just treat him. I think he's worse shaped than I am. But she had some internal injuries they didn't know about. And like three days later, she died. Wow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It is a lot. That's a lot. We have four. Yeah. Well, on our way here, I'm assuming we all came our normal way here. We passed the WSM radio tower. It's, when it was built, it was the tallest structure in the United States. Wow. And second in the world just to the Eiffel tower. Isn't that crazy?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's how big the Eiffel Tower is, basically. The Eiffel Tower is probably a little bigger. Yeaah. It was, uh, it's 808 feet now. It was 878 feet when it was constructed. I didn't lose feet. They took off some of the top, uhm, on purpose. They gave it to the- Scoliosis. They gave it to Lipscomb.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They said they gave it to Lipscomb Elementary, which is across the street there, and they use it as a flagpole. But they took it off and said so radio coverage could reach Chattanooga. Apparently it was too high and it was going over Chattanooga, so they wanted to reach it. But it was a clear channel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nashville got it the name Music City.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Couple ways. In 1871, Fisk University was about to close. They had financial issues. And the Fisk Jubilee Singers started touring the world performing to raise money for the school. And the Queen of England, Queen Victoria said, you guys must come from a city of music.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that was the first time that that had ever been said. And then it started, uh, WSM later did a radio show called Music City. And then Johnny Cash had a TV show on ABC, a weekly TV show. And they would start saying, uhm, coming to you live from Music City, USA, Nashville, Tennessee. And that's how the name Music City kind of became a thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But they wouldn't allow, the opera wouldn't allow long haired country boys to perform. You had to cut your hair and people complained about it. So outlaw country kind of started because they also wanted a certain sound. You had to use national recording.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wow. I feel like, like, in rap music, there's a lot of people that die from being shot. And in rock music, a lot of people die from drug overdoses. Country, I feel like has a lot of plane crashes. A lot of...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know that name. He was huge in country back then. There's a conspiracy theory. He, uh, he knew, uhm, Lee Harvey Oswald and Jack Ruby.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wanted to share that with you. Yeah, they probably got him. I'll check it out. I guess Jack Ruby owned a restaurant or something, a social gathering and he knew Lee Harvey Oswald and Jim Reeves performed there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The country music has a lot of royalty. They like to get a lot of titles. So, you know who's considered the king of country music?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, some buddies of mine from Lebanon got into a road rage incident with Tracy Lawrence back when he was at the peak of his career.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Oh, this was your friends? Yeah. Oh, jeez. Yeah. Uh, nah, they said he fired a shot. Does that, or did that say he just pulled a gun on us?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, they may have started, they may have cut him off or who knows. I mean, they didn't know who he was at the time. They're just driving home from downtown Nashville to Lebanon and there's some guy in a pickup truck.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They were being dumb, he was being dumb, but he just happened to be a huge country singer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Garth Brooks is by far the most best-selling country artist of all time. Almost doubles the next one, George Strait.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What about Lynyrd Skynyrd? What is their signature song? Well, Sweet Home Alabama. More than Freebird?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, so Gar's the, by far the best selling. George Straits had the most number ones. Alabama's the biggest country band. Uh, Dixie Chicks. My home's in Alabama.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So Taylor Swift's not on this list, I'm guessing. Maybe they don't consider her. At a certain point they stopped counting her. Yea, Shania Twain's the best selling female artist.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Eagles. Oh, not the Eagles. Not the Eagles. Eagles greatest hits, but worldwide it's still Thriller.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay. Because Michael Jackson is so big in other countries too. Yeah, I mean, he's another one. You'll see his house.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, we all know that Dolly Parton's from, you know, Sevierville, and she's got Dollywood, but I don't know if there's anything for her childhood home or not. Well, I think you would go to Dollywood.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It could be a tornado. Yeah. But the ditch is still there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Blue Ridge Comedy Club, uh, this Friday, Saturday in Bristol, please come see me. Your Bridgestone's officially sold out, Nate.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I hope you're still doing comedy at 76. I hope so too. Your farewell tour.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Again, yeaah, that feels good. I think it's so funny.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've been reading all these conspiracy theories that Georgia has been pumping their players full of misinformation all season.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 100,000 times. It's almost every time the Chargers are gonna win that game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I was checking them off my bucket list, man. I've hung out with Greg Gumbel on Friday. He's a big fan of Kathleen Madigan, who I was opening for. So he came and we went out, hung out. He had some crazy stories about hanging out with athletes and stuff. And then Bob Lee came out the next night. One of the original anchors of sports center.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think one of the original 19 employees of ESPN and he was there and both those guys, there's their voices are so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're both super cool, super nice. They're both big comedy fans. So it was really cool to hang out with them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I do look older than him in the picture. Yeah. And I, and he's lost a bunch of weight. I'm, I'm bigger than him and I look older than him. He's in his seventies. It was the old guy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. So it's just, it's crazy to people. Yeah. There's me and Greg Gumbel right here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I've never seen that. I would say this is an anomaly. If this happened recently, this is an anomaly, Sam. And I wouldn't judge Southwest for, uh, for this fight. You know, it's like give them another chance. I mean, I agree with Aaron.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I guess I'm just used to it now. You know, I clocked it. This is what infuriates me. And this is, I don't think this is a Southwest problem, but I was about halfway down the plane.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And as soon as the plane this weekend, as soon as it parked, you know, and then they said everyone, you can start leaving the plane. It took 12 minutes for me to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But if, if the concern is compliance, then I feel like you'd have a better luck just being honest with people. I'd be much more willing to go, Oh yeah, I'll just turn my phone off. You know, I'll just pay attention.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All I know is they threw up a 5G tower right across from Zany's and then three days later somebody crashed a truck into your face.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't think there's a cap on the amount of commas he can have, but it does get to a point where, alright, let's start a new sentence.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But then I guess the airline has to add this additional tag onto it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That says live animals and then they wrote snakes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it looks like, uh, here they are. They're just orange and black kind of monsters.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, yeah, but then he goes on to describe, we're just humiliating the bodies of these poor animals. So it's good to know they were put down, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Some of my friends went to his wedding and all those guys were there. It was pretty crazy. You were like friends, did you ever talk to him still? I haven't talked to him in a few years. Yeah. Henry's his name.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, my janitor growing up, his last name was Burke and that's how it was spelled.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Can I ask you, if you'd have gone home and then found out that you only looked at the replica, would that have cheapened the experience for you? Would that have ruined the memory? You still felt the same way.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, they love to tell you. They love when it comes around to something they know just a little bit about.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't think the long term plan is to ever live on the moon. The long term plan is to live on Mars.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what they, we have, we have a, we can actually create an atmosphere on Mars and have breathable air there. Terraforming. That's what they call it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Essentially, bring all the aerosol sprays and gasoline vehicles.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it would have to be one of Jupiter's moons, I think.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think all the planets have a ring of some kind. They're just, the Saturn one is like, crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now I could be completely wrong about this. Put a ring on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But somebody told me this once, uh, a long time ago that there's obviously it's not, but there is something resembling a ring of.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, here it is. Although Earth doesn't have a ring system today, it may have had one in the past.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All the gas giants have rings. Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, and...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, it's rocks and solid stuff. But those planets are gas giant planets. You couldn't, you couldn't land on those. You know, it's all just gas. You just go through it. Well, yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, the ring is things that have been kept in orbit around the planet.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It could, yeah, it could be that. I mean, we could have that on earth. We put enough pollution on, on trash out in space. It could form a ring of just garbage around.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do you think it's ethical to just launch space out into the, the a bit and launch trash into the abyss?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think they haven't found a way for, to do it cost efficient. It costs a lot of money to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So this is the discover magazine says that it would cost 33 quadrillion dollars a year to launch our trash into space.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. But that's money that there's a real resources that you need to, to build that stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So this is, these are arguments against shooting it into the sun. It says it actually costs less to just shoot it out into the, out of the solar system than it does right into the sun for some reason. And it's, it said mainly the reason is just the cost. It just costs so much money to do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We all just agreed. A little bit of a tax hike. Let's fund this. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, they're saying that a big benefit of doing this with all the nuclear waste that's really dangerous that America has, that you just shoot that out in the space and it's not our problem anymore.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We have 60,000 tons of high level nuclear waste in the United States alone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You do all the work. We send you a meal, you cook it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What do you think the success rate is on a homing pigeon? I mean, obviously more than 50 50.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was just in Philadelphia a few, a few days ago and they talked about that. I walked here. I went to the Liberty bell. I went to independence hall. I was reading up on it. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pretty underwhelming grave. You think you would have a big headstone, but it was just a, just a nothing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We do need a few more of him. He's a real renaissance man. Spoke a lot of languages. That's always been like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Amazing to me, people that could speak different languages, you know? You know what I like to use? Babble.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thanks to Babel's fun and easy bite sized language lessons, you can feel confident no matter where the new year takes you. I've told you guys I'm going to Brazil in October for a wedding. I need to brush up on the Portuguese.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My brother-in-law is marrying a woman from Brazil. Getting married in Sao Paulo.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then we're going to Argentina and see Patagonia and they speak Welsh down there. Isn't that crazy?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's a bunch of Welsh people came there. Languages are crazy. You don't ever know what people are going to say. I want to cover all my bases here. You need to go to Babel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ten minute lessons, I mean you can knock out a bunch. You can start having real life conversations in a new language in as little as three weeks. The big thing here is this is not built by AI. We've played around with AI on here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's fun, but it's not perfect. You want to talk to somebody who really speaks a language. That's how these courses are built.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Spanish, French, Italian, German, Russian, whatever you want, they got it on there. Right now, get up to 55% off your subscription when you go to babbel.com slash nate. That's B-A-B-B-E-L dot com slash nate for up to 55% off your subscription. Babbel. A language for life.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That seems like a much better way to do it. If you're the post office.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Was the post office ever using pigeons?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't think so. There's a little bit of time between that and the first American post-off.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So they were using just horse and carriage, just.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] By the way, the early days of the Pony Express was very expensive for people to ship stuff. $5 for every half ounce of mail. Wow. So that's the equivalent of $130 today per half ounce.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They lowered it to one dollar, but that was still really, really high back then, so that's why it went out of business. You're right, it wasn't a sustainable model.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They probably have a couple of different ones. Florida is west of South Carolina. Yeah. Yeah. So it's probably just twos and threes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Why would you care about the H? If they took the H out of Nashville, I wouldn't care. Nassville?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] See the joke about, yeaah, just the idea that you can


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Take this to Alaska. Can I get you anything else? More stamps.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah, presumptuous. Yeaah. I don't know what he said. There's also a facility.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] With stamps attached to their clothing, children rode trains to the destinations accompanied by letter carriers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Are there still services for that? What do you think? Obviously they're different, but. Well, you can fly your kit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's gotta be some circumstance where, for totally valid reasons, I have to send my newborn to San Francisco without me. You know? There's gotta be some service.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Go on Fiverr, TaskRabbit or something, I'll figure it out. Gotta ship the kid over there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Put the kid in an Uber and just drive the Uber all the way out there one way.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just find a guy you really trust. Stick your kid in the back of his Honda Civic.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When you were, no, when you were Uber driving, somebody goes, listen, I'll give you, it's going to be a huge bill. It's going to be $1,800, but drive my kid to California.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, there's always missing kids and stuff up there. I figure you might as well throw a top 10 list.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I am, uh, next weekend, I'm going to be in Raleigh, North Carolina at good nights.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've never been. I'm excited. And I just added a bunch of dates. I'm going to Charlottesville, Virginia now. I'm going to, uh, West Bend, Wisconsin. I'm going to, uh, Lexington, Kentucky at Comedy Off-Broadway. A lot of fun spots. Aaron Webber Comedy. Come hang out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I appreciate that. And I noticed that. And you will be rewarded.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The Sizzler sounds like a drink to me. It's like an icy. Let's go get a Sizzler at the 7-Eleven. That's what it sounds like to me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And uh, since then they've posted profits of 11.5 million, 13.5 million.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know a model I've seen a lot, I see it on, mostly with software, like I'll download an app or something and it has variable pricing where you just choose how much you want to pay for it. It'd be like 8, 24, 38 dollars.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And a surprising amount of people don't pay the minimum. They're like, I actually like this product. I'll just pay more for it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wait, what is, oh. It's variable pricing. You download the app and then you decide how much you want to pay for it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's interesting. And if you're genuinely like, this is a small company that makes this app, I want to support them. I'll pay a little more for it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A real expert. I would like to check in with uh, Mr. Jada at some point, see what he's up to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Bigfoot expert. We forgot his actual name. We call him the Bigfoot guy so often, but you know, I think about that guy a lot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which a friend of the podcast Nick Novicki was on. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, people get mad. I see comments all the time. They go, they're sitting there talking about Southern air can just look it up. Well, that kind of just kills the conversation.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] With an E, they put an E. I think that's how Shelbyfoot, I think that's how he spells his name. Oh. You know Shelbyfoot? Uh-uh. He's a historian.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He, you would watch him, uh, in his documentaries.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But there's a guy, Shelby Foote, who might be related to Josh Foote.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I bet you look back and things make sense. Yeaah. You know, you never think that at the time, but once you find out, you're like, maybe he did act a little weird that one time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] See, I would have thought that'd be moving up to go from an RV park to a trailer park, but you think it's the opposite.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How do you feel about doing a free sample? I've always, I hate, I always judge people that do free samples at these places. It's like part of it is you just


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, I don't know if it's fun, but that's the point. You gotta, sometimes you gotta prepare for stuff that's not fun. If you're looking to organize your financial future, make sure, you like how I spun that? It was actually a terrible segue you had. You saved me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you're looking to organize your financial future, you know where you gotta start. It's with Life Insurance. Fabric by Gerber Life provides an easy one stop shop for all your family's financial needs, offering high quality term life insurance policies plus other financial solutions in one easy online hub. It was designed by parents for parents.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And on your time, if you need extra support, they have a team of licensed insurance agents that can answer questions. You could be offered coverage instantly with no health exam required.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was, it was when we were on the road doing the drive-in tour and I can't remember who texted me, but I was outside the bus and they texted me and said,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're all lying to Nick Novicki and telling him we've never heard of Nancy Kerrigan.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Antonia Harding and that whole thing. Oh yeah. We've never heard of it. And I, and I remember I walked in and he was like in a fierce debate. I haven't heard of this. I mean, my God. We're all just pretending. We were like, wow, it's a crazy story.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You come back and remember Nick's blind and it's night. So he goes back and we're watching Nick like look around for us and we're all just hiding behind bushes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pretty regularly, we get rolled, we only had two trees in our front yard, but they would get rolled and the house would get rolled.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, I remember one year was actually a problem was they paintballed our minivan.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so where it was like dense and stuff, so that was a problem. I think he was probably mad about that one. The other stuff didn't bother him that much. Well, my mom, what my mom started doing is she realized


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That these kids, they trashed the house, but they wanted to see it in the daylight.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So they trash it at like 2, 3 in the morning and then once sunrise they come back.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To like, you know, maybe get pictures, but to see what they've done. So my mom would clean it up between those hours. My mom would sit there in the living room and watch them through the window do this to the house. And then when they leave, she'd go out and clean it up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then she'd stay awake, get a cup of coffee and watch them pull around.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To look at the house and it was all perfectly clean. She did that for...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's why she did it. She was like, that just felt so good for them to be so disappointed. It's all gone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Did you guys do senior pranks when you were in high school?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I do, I had a bit where I talked about it, yeaah, and asked what people do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My school and i think this is an approach that more schools are doing is it sort of a school sanctioned senior prank.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's where they allow it to happen. They understand there's gonna be some kind of senior prank. So what we'll do is we'll kind of, we'll allow it, but we'll just make sure it doesn't go too crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's how ours was. Like a teacher was there with us when we were...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Doing stuff to the school. They let us in, but a teacher's there to make sure we didn't light the building on fire. You know, but I think we took all the desks and chairs out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And built this huge pyramid on the front lawn, did a bunch of other stuff. A common one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's taking red solo cups and filling them up with water and then just like paving the floor with it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, like inside, in the school. Like in the hallway. In the hallway of a school. So like, yea, you just can't even take a step without... No, you mean you have to individually empty all the cups. You can't just...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, there's probably more of that going on than they let us know about, but we were, we had like a cool teacher that was like, I'll just make sure it's not crossing the line.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was the guy, when we would go roll people's house in middle school, I was always the guy that was like, come on guys, listen.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was the lame guy. That guy's come on, let's get out. We don't know. We'd do it to strangers houses. Yeah, yeah, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One of my guilty pleasures is this guy on TikTok I follow and I'm not proud of.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't like what he does. I'm against what he does, but the videos are so funny. It's just, it's just him. He's got a GoPro on and he just walks up to people at Walmart and just picks fights with people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You guys move along, pipsqueak. He keeps calling people pipsqueaks. And it's so funny, but I, you know, I don't like it, but it's so much fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well that is, the talent or whatever, what they have that I don't, is that ability, I could never do that to a stranger in public.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When I opened for Dusty at, uh, Levity Live, where is that? In New York?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Remember at 14. I mean, imagine being 14, you can just do whatever you want. No repercussions.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He thinks he's filming another sketch and then he falls through the ground in a pit of snakes. Wow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think for this joke to work, you'd have to first explain the concept of pie to a lot of people. And then be like, it's actually three.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're doing a launch. Okay. Where'd it go? Hope the rocket's come back down.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My understanding was that SpaceX, one of their big innovations was that the rockets were reusable and they'd launch something and then the rocket comes back down and lands where it took off.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, whatever it's taken up detaches itself from the rocket. Now, now traditionally how rockets have worked up until now is that rocket then dies, crashes into the ocean or whatever and it's tremendously expensive.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So this idea is that rocket will then comes back down and lands right where it was.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, so it took whatever up, then it comes back.