[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're paying off your mortgage till you die, kind of thing. And it's this idea of, just the modern way of capitalism. I mean, it's funny really to see these little things happen, because it's kind of...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's kinda like, I was thinking about this the other day, where someone said, you know, there was this, he saw this kid at a music festival, right? And uhm, the kid was like, going around the music festival, grabbing up empty cups and taking them back, because they were being paid 10p for them, right? So there were kids running all around.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, plastic cups. It's like an eco-initiative, right? So they wanted to like, you know, encourage people to bring back their plastic cups, right? So what happened was, of course,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Capitalism took hold and the kids who were not being properly supervised were, you know, flitting about this place grabbing up


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All the cups to try and make some money and, and, and obviously what, what happened was this enterprising youngster. So a man had, a man had left his pint.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, looking, eyeing up his pint and he was like, what's this kid doing? And of course what happened was the kid...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, or you're basically kind of cheekily stealing other people's pints because they've just popped the toilet, you know. But that kid saw an opening.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, for an opportunity, and that I think is


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The definition of capitalism in a nutshell, right? Like people will do what they can get away with. They'll test their limits, because this is what people do. This is what your kids do. This is what my friends do. This is what


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] People in relationships do, this is what everyone, and monkeys do it, you know, and your pets will do it, they will test their limits and they will see what they're, uh, not, what they can get away with.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that's what capitalism is. And so often it's...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pushing the line of morality, especially if it's un... if there's no guidance, if there's no rules, you know, no one's obviously told this kid to pour away a full pint.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Isn't she like the biggest VTuber? No, it's probably me now. She's not a VTuber, she's a Twitch streamer. I mean, Hololive have some enormous streamers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe on Twitch, but I think there's some YouTubers, especially Hololive, which is this enormous talent agency. It's, I mean, they've got


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They made like a billion, they had like a billion dollars last year. Seriously? It was nuts. Like more than that. Yea, they have like, hundreds of employees, they manage like 50 vtubers, it's huge. It's huge.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, uh, it's mental. I mean, this is the world we live in though. And I'm not saying that you can't...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well the thing is, it's just worse every day, isn't it? You know, it's like, in Venezuela, it's like, oh no, my hot dog is now worth fifteen billion dollars.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They throw something in the garbage, and I don't wanna get it out. I'm like, fuck, it's gone. Do you know what I mean? Or, like, I struggle. Like, I'm a man. Like, god, have you ever had to suggest you've been bagged or something? Fuck. Yeah, it's horrible. It's stupid.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Imagine though, imagine this, his little celebrity that he's gotten from that, if he had, if he's done, maybe he's done things like Graham Norton, I don't fucking know who watches that shit, but, you know,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe he's done like these things and he has got enough money to like buy back like the same amount. No, not the same amount. Oh, not now though, right? Imagine if his bitcoins were worth...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I did hear a bit about this, cos remember Logan Paul, recently, bought some... he announced that he'd spent, like, three and a half million dollars on Pokémon cards. That were, like, sealed and authenticated first edition Pokémon cards. Do you remember this?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, it's a meme, isn't it? Obviously there's a whole thing about, like, with YouTube and MrBeast and people doing these grand


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wild things, right? And some of the, like, first edition Pokémon cards are genuinely worth a fucking shitload of money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The one that he bought, he bought it from like a collector, okay, so he bought his from a sports card collector for


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Who bought it for 2.7 million, okay, apparently, but that guy had bought it from this eBay seller, uhm, who bought it from another eBay seller, and because it's sealed, right, and inverted commas authenticated, it turns out


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That Logan Paul has bought for three and a half million dollars was sold for $71,000. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because it was sold on this auction, where the guy who was selling it told three different stories on where he got it from, uh, he, they had absolutely no reason to trust him, he had no, like, provenance on eBay, he had like a brand new eBay account, like basically, basically it turns out


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That Logan Paul's first edition 3.5 million dollar thing that he paid for, this authenticated whatever, blah blah blah Pokemon, is probably just a box with nothing in it. Really? Or fake. Yeah. It's probably, because it's sealed though, that's the point. Oh, right. Has he opened it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In my mind, though, this is so scammable, right, because these things are not fucking currency, and even then...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] People have made incredibly good currency. Like, wasn't it, like, North Korea or someone had been making the super dollar, have you heard about this? Like, there was a thing recently where, uhm, there were actually, like, so good fake dollars.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So apparently North Korea has produced 45 million dollars worth of super dollars at this sort of factory run by the sort of North Korean military or whatever. And they're so good that they've obviously had to put in additional


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is why dollars have always over the years had all these additional watermarks and additional things, but apparently they had like holograms on them and watermarks on them and stuff like this, you know what I mean, like the right paper, they were like the right heaviness and the right texture, they, it was like amazingly good counterfeit, uhm, dollars, right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And how do you authenticate this shit, too? Like, to some extent. Like, people were faking paintings, up until recently I watched a little documentary about how these Chinese guys were just doing fake paintings with


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The original, like, you know, old ink and old stuff they'd grind up and old paper and no one could authenticate it because they carbon dated the paper and it was fine. They carbon dated the ink and it was fine. You know, they were like, how do we fucking tell that this isn't real?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, they, and obviously they eventually did find out that they'd accidentally used some acrylic ink in there somewhere, and, you know, they did find out that it was fake, or else we wouldn't fucking know about it. But what I'm saying is...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I think the fakers are not faking the high-end stuff either, right? They're faking the middle stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, the people, the stuff that people won't notice. And does it matter if everyone thinks it's real? It's like that guy who had this huge wine collection that was all fake.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It didn't really matter because people sort of still believed it was real, so he was still able to sell it and do stuff with it, right? And sometimes even the fakes were worth money because they became sort of famous, there was this big scam.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This guy had all this fake wine, but it was known to be fake wine, and it was made by this sort of faker guy, and it was still worth something in a bizarre way because it was famously fake.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I can't remember what it was called, it was some wine documentary about man, but I've watched a lot of these and I'm terrified of, like, this whole industry. The baseball cards and the poker cards.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well I think that these, the card making companies really have, really capitalised on this collectible idea lately. And so, what you've got is these obviously baseball cards that are unique, or signed, or


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Um, especially like, you know, like, it's crazy to think that you open a set of baseball cards and you might have in that set, like, the golden ticket. Do you know what I mean? The one baseball card of this one guy, and therefore it's unique. And it's like an NFT, I guess, in a sense. There's only ever gonna be one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The whole thing had to hook in to a series of psychological tricks, right? So back then, it was mainly about you convincing your friends to buy it so you could trade with them. Because that's what you needed. You needed to collect them all and fill up the book.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because that was like, it was satisfying psychologically to collect them all, it was satisfying to stick them all in the book, and also you had to, you needed other people, you had doubles, and you needed your friends to


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, it was almost like a viral sensation, a clever psychological trick.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's more the loot box trick, it's more that you could find a million dollars in your baseball cards, right? Because, but without saying that. It's amazing how young you are. It's like a lottery ticket, it's like getting around those rules of gambling, you know, because baseball cards


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is why people buy those Pokémon first position sealed sets, because they're sealed, and the idea is that it could be worth ten minutes. It's kinda nuts though.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I'll tell you what happened, these things were inspirations for the next generation, which was called Monsters in My Pocket, and that was made by Mattel, and that was the inspiration for Pokémon. Remember Garbage Pail Kids as well?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There was a display box for monsters in my pocket, right? And it was like a pyramid shape. I had one of these, and the idea was that you would fill it up by trading with your friends, right? Uhm, but I remember...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Some of them were called like, I remember at the time being, not really realising this, but some of them were called like Kali and Ganesha and Yamar and these like Hindu gods, who were depicted as monsters, right? It wasn't the most sensitive sort of time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's interesting, because sometimes stuff is hilariously worthless, right? Like, a friend of mine...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, of course, it's worth exactly the same as when they bought it in the millennium, it's not gained a single pound. And the reason is because it wasn't that collectible in the first place, and there were millions of them made, and they were all sold to people as this collectible thing, you know, on the idea that people would


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, you know, a millennium, that's gotta be worth something, you know, the millennium one. It's not, actually, it's not that those iconic ones that are worth money, it's the rare ones. It's probably the 1999 and the 2001 one that no one bought, are actually way more collectible than these, like, kind of momentary


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was obviously very highly valued because of the loot that they'd put into the, into the, into the packs, right? So there was this rare Spectral Tiger mount that was worth, I think it's still worth like thousands of dollars. Um, because it, cause it was, it was rare.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Everyone is so desperate to get these specific pieces of loot. Right. That, yeah, that everything else is kinda worthless. It's funny what gets you sales though as well, cause you can imagine


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, at the time, Blizzard being like, oh yeah, we'll help promote your card game. We'll give you some.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Mounts for the game, some rare loot cards, sure. But that's what the game became, that's why people bought it. People were buying it for the loot cards, they were not buying it to play the game, and as a result that's where the value comes from in that. And it's bizarre that that was originally an aside, or a kind of promotional aside.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, that then becomes the main source of like, of interest. Anyway, fucking hell.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Before we continue, you guys already know about ExpressVPN. How could you not? We talk about them all the time. Every time. And we cannot stress the importance of protecting your online activity from big tech who want to profit off of you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Talking about stuff that kids are into, have you been, have you guys used TikTok?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, no it's fine. Basically, TikTok, okay, the actual company TikTok, this isn't a joke, uhm, have announced they're opening ghost restaurants. Sorry?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ghost kitchens. So basically stuff for delivery apps, like Uber Eats and Deliveroo and stuff, that aren't, don't actually exist, have a premises. They just serve food, they deliver food to people on these delivery apps. They have like a kitchen set up somewhere, and they only do Deliveroo.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, but they were like almost like surprised to have someone come into the restaurant. They've got like tables and stuff in there, no one's in there. Right. Of course, but they're constantly like, oh, we're so busy. Well, you know, we're out of tofu or something. And I was like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just from orders with like, you know, delivery apps, which was astonishing. So it's actually, yeah, this is the situation we're living in now. People don't want to eat out, they just want to order in from restaurants.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It costs me the same to buy a loaf of bread, a pack of cheese, a pack of salad, and make my own cheese sandwich, than it does to buy a cheese sandwich. And I can make seven cheese sandwiches from that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you're buying a sandwich sandwich sandwich, you could buy a fuckin'... you know, you could go and get bread and cheese for weeks. Weeks and weeks.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's this nice Violife coconut cheese and it tastes like cheese and it smells like cheese and I don't hate it. I must admit, shout out to Violife for the cheese.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] TikTok are opening these ghost restaurants that aren't really, they're not really planning on making them actual restaurants, it's kind of a marketing thing, but there's


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well I think the idea is to buy the weird meme-y food that TikTok are making and then film themselves doing it. And so it's stuff that has been made popular by users, apparently one of those baked feta pasta


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There are pasta chips, there are corn ribs, and smash burgers. I have no idea what any of these things are. Jesus. What the fuck are smash burgers, dude? Uhm, but yeah, like, there's like a billion viewers monthly on Twitch, right? It's nuts. On Twitch?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He does this same shit, right, where he's like, oh, you buy one of my t-shirts, and I'm just gonna put a thousand dollars in one of the orders, you know. Uh, it's, it's, it's again, like, part of this psychological shit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He, he like, his whole Team Seas thing, it's like, sure it's definitely raising awareness about plastic pollution in the oceans, but the problem is that the actual initiative is crap. You know, we, like, I think there were some stats done where


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Um, and not only is it nothing, but all the people who donated will now not donate to things that actually make a difference, right, because they think they've done their job.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so, yeah, like, I get what you're doing, and I think you're getting a lot of credit for it, and a lot of karma for it from the community, and you're seen as being this good guy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you haven't made any fucking difference to the problem and in fact may have exacerbated the problem. Uhm, but maybe it is just a step towards raising awareness about this issue and hopefully


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What actually needs to be done is... Yeah, I guess if it promotes awareness, that's good. Is things like France, like France have just put in a ban on single use plastics for certain foods, so, I dunno, like, a lemon wrapped in plastic, do you know what I mean? Yes. That shit's crazy. That is some dumb shit. I know, it's so dumb.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So that stuff is being like blocked in France and some other European countries and they're sort of with the idea that more and more things will


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, if it's got the little icon on it, it's recyclable. No, only things with like a three and a four, or whatever, or two and a one are recyclable. Any of the other numbers, even if they got the symbol,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that's, and that's how we get kids pouring out their-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Perfectly good, pouring out perfectly good pints of cider on the ground. But no, it's hard not to get mad about this stuff, right? And I'm not saying we should.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Um, yeah, like, like, MrBeast, I'm sure it's great. And TikTok doing viral food? Funny. It's chill. I'm down with it. I wanna buy some fucking pasta chips. I'm not down with it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's how we like to leave our audience. Fuck. Uh, after a podcast. Do you know what you might need, actually, Sips? What? I've got another little bit of news.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You look like fucked up Cthulhu things. Yeah, there is, I've seen a lot of those. Yeah, I've seen a couple too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right? And the idea is it's like an AI generated podcast with a nonsensical story that has a soothing voice.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And like synth, little synth music in the background. The idea is that it just helps you fall asleep.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, you should check out Deep Dreams. Uh, we're not sponsored or anything involved, but basically the one, I listened to a little bit of this podcast and it's, it's, it's like, starts with like talking about the three bears, the three little bears, right? But then they get this ambition to go to Germany and become


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's wonderfully, uhm, stupid, right? Like, it doesn't, it's entirely...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Exactly. So, in a wonderful, in a wonderful way, I, I, rather than work for some, uh, slaving, uh, Pokemon farm in...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Send them out, you know what I mean? You build these stupid things that use algorithms and AI to generate this mental thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then you just shit it out. You see on TikTok a lot of these people don't even use their own voice, they use like the AI Brian voice, and they're like, ah!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] P-Flex says you don't have to use your face now, you can just get a fuckin' cartoon. You don't have to use your face, you don't have to use your voice. You don't have to use shit, you could literally talk into something that picks up your voice and then translates it into a fuckin' AI Brian. You could be, you could be, like, and in fact maybe that's the secret, right? Do your research, guys.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, we want the kids to know about different meanings. Good fucking Lord. I have got some more shit in this fucking list of things I've researched, do you want more? There's this pirate, right, well he's not really a pirate, he's an American guy, who found a shipwreck


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When was this? In 1988. Right. And he found this shipwreck in the SS Central America off the coast of South Carolina, okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Retrieved a load of gold, uhm, and apparently retrieved more gold than his expedition's investors, uhm, than he told them about. Right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is, this is a really fucking crazy story because there's a guy who apparently found more coins than he told him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, so this guy's like a pirate, right? He's hidden, he's buried some gold, apparently, and he's keeping quiet about it, until he gets out of prison, um, but the thing is, he is not allowed- So he's been sentenced to


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Exactly. Well, they're sentencing him based on a loophole, okay? So every time he goes to court, they say to him,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well no, but like, you know how it works in America, you can just build up a rack of debt of absolutely ludicrous amounts of money, and so much so that you'll never pay it off, that that's just how it works. America is built on this idea of mega-debt that you can't possibly pay off. Like, if you get sick and get an ambulance, you're suddenly 25 grand in debt for that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's, I don't know what the idea is, but basically, it's a whole cyclical thing. So, yes, either this guy is innocent and doesn't know where the gold is and what there wasn't gold.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he's, and he's just stuck in prison with a mega fine, right? Which was just gonna keep getting bigger. Or, you know, he has been keeping stum about this actual goal, but it's gonna be worth less than the amount that he's gonna be fined.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right. So he's basically saying, I won't let you, I won't give you my power of attorney to search anything under my name in all of these places. Right. Okay. So it's not quite the same. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh man. What a story. Holy crap. What a story. Man, so that's a modern pirate. Amazing. Just fuckin' trapped in jail, poor lad.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thank you for joining us, this week, it's a pleasure, I'll be back, we'll be back next week with more guff, and things we don't understand, things we hate, uh, things


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Things we're confused by, and things we're ignorant about. Yes. Yes. Those are the things that we do. Uh, 200 episodes, and still the same.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's definitely a game, and it's a game I played at my nan's house, y'know, that's how old we're talking here. And, y'know, along with Kaplunk, and uh, all of those. Mousetrap. That was a terrible board game. These things are still popular, y'know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But they are though, because there's that nostalgia value, right? Really? Like, when you go to buy a board game for your nine year old, you wanna buy the board games that you played when you were nine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It really was. Buckaroo was a game where you had to pile shit, plastic shit, onto a springed plastic horse that at a certain point you would put too much on, you see, and then it would...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh! Oh I see, so the pop-up pirate is the one where you stab him a certain amount of times.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think women are more afraid to nerd out though about the way that men do. I think it's embarrassing, not embarrassing, but certainly not, it's frowned upon to geek out the way that he does almost. And also I think lockpicking and him in general is an interesting thing. We see it as this


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It sort of slightly looks, feels a bit criminal, do you know what I mean? It's this kind of thing that you see spies do and stuff on...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Having a very specific power like that is useful for sort of very specific things, i.e. spying and information gathering. You know, he's not gonna be able to lift a car, or he might accidentally get squashed by a crane in a warehouse when he's trying to spy on them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But not too hocks, otherwise the sweaty footprints would give them away.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Would you, would you drink invisible water?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, no, let's not, I'm not assuming the invisible man is to drug kill, whatever. I'm just saying, if they invented invisible water, and invisible food, would you eat and drink it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How do you feel about, imagine you could take a pill that would give you the same pleasure as having an orgasm. Would you just take that instead?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, the problem is, that is actually what these... I've never done the hardcore trunks.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I think you're not alone. I think a lot of people over lockdown have spent a lot of time watching films and TV and doing these things at home with their partners. And the same, because we went to the cinema and saw Batman, uhm, this week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, the cinema, my god. It was... Oh my god. It was... Kinda, I've seen a few people complain about it, but like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There were just people with their phones on, like, day mode, you know, right in front of us, just browsing Reddit, or like checking their email, or like fucking scanning through Instagram, like, and there were people just getting up all the time, there were people just chatting at normal volume about things that were happening.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and I don't think they, I don't think, I think if any of them have been told, oh look, could you just keep it quiet, they probably wouldn't be like, oh sorry, sorry, sorry. You know, but, like, I think it's just people have just...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like formulaic as fuck. And Martina has an app which is called like P-Break or something, I can't remember what it's called, but basically it tells you when you can safely have a pee in a cinema. Oh my god. Well you should go and use the facility.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There was like this one bit and it was like, I dunno, two hours, 19 or something.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just to get through, right? I reckon with this app, you could properly just zip-zap through movies quicker, get through all the dross, just get to the...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's certain things that pull you out of immersion, isn't there? We've talked about this before, where I think that's so important to have something that grips you. And I think sometimes big celebrities are the opposite of that. They're like, oh, it's...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe his star has shined though. But yeah, Robert Pattinson obviously has to be huge, and he's Batman. And he does well on it. I'll say uhm... He does well on it! He does well on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's weird, he's got a great jawline, but you don't sort of see it, like, necessarily when he takes the mask off. He sort of goes from Weedly Emo Boy to...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, the Batman. The Batman. And, uh, Zoe Kravitz was in it, who was, um, who was... she was really good, but man, did she remind me of Halle Berry's Catwoman. Oh yeah, Halle Berry's


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well I bet. She, she looks great. She does look great, she's 57 years old man.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In season one of Fresh Prince, they had guest stars Don Cheadle, they had Shaft, they had fucking Quincy Jones, they had Demi Campbell...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] His story is so weird. It does, it does feel like he kind of just faked it till he made it in some cases, you know, but had enough, had enough money. Like after, cause I spoke about the old inventing Anna thing last, last week, like this whole world of kind of, you have to


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, like, like him ringing up the, you know, New York Times rich list or whatever, like, you know, as his assistant, and, you know, telling them how rich he was kind of thing. This sort of stuff that he did was so... I dunno, like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Both desperate and smart in a way. Like, do you know what I mean? Like, kind of, I dunno, it kind of, it reeks of like, negative stuff, but at the same time, that's kind of, it's like the politics game, right? It's how you play, you have to, you have to get people, you have to get people to think a certain way about you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you have to get people on your side, and you have to get people to vote, sort of, I dunno, it's strange. It's an odd one, isn't it? It is weird.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're in the boat, in that bath with you, right? Yeah, at least. And then getting sprayed by some of the water. And their initial responses are always protective of you, right? So, rather than, like, prickly, you know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, I think he's done amazing in terms of just people, just for some reason, feeling like they have to be on his side, you know? Yeah. Like, I think- It's a weird one, isn't it? It is so weird. So clever. You almost sound like you wish that you


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or maybe like a subscribe to a VPN service? Just spontaneous.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So no, they were, they were, there was this, in the serial podcast, which was mostly about murders. They've kind of, often what happens is these podcasts I listen to, they kind of, they keep their podcasts as like an enclosed story and then they launch a new podcast with a new story about it. Right, right. And so they have, and it's hard for them to...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Election fraud, uhm, in this, like, in this American, like, little county. And I've been listening through it and, and it feels like there's this sort of...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause it's one of these small counties that's got like 70,000 people in, and it's like 60% white, 40% black, but because of that, uhm, and because of certain things that they've always done, like they've had the only place where you can vote in the area, the white area, right, and so...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If black people want to vote, they have to drive half an hour to vote. And that's one of these ways of voter suppression, right? Like there's loads of ways that you could suppress


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So conventionally this place was just incredibly white dominated, right? And uhm, the ways that they sort of


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And obviously what happened was there were a lot of election scandals because the black community got together, they got this sort of block and they started voting as a group. And everyone thought that was kind of, because it was so well organised, it just felt so...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yes, that is literally what that is. But for some reason, asking all the black people to vote the same way is a problem.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, and so the white people rose up and started doing some of the things that they were doing, but illegally. Uhm, they started like throwing away ballots and doing all these things.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Um, and of course, they're sort of often, it's a small town, full of rumour, full of drama, full of like, people accusing things about, say the other side did this thing, the other side did this thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Um, and it's all just like little, little kind of... But one of the major problems is that it really shows like how in a small town,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Rumours and fears have, have, have, have persisted or been repeated and sort of fanned the flames of drama in this place. Often with no merit. Like there was this thing where there was this idea that, that people in a nursing home, so


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The idea was that the block had gone to this nursing home and gotten all of the people in the nursing home to vote and then taken all their ballots in, you know, for them kind of thing. And that was sort of this idea that was, you know, doesn't sound very ethical, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, but of course, it was investigating. It turned out it was just a woman who worked there. A lot of the old folks were like, oh, can you help us vote? And she was like, okay. So she helped them. And, you know, it wasn't anything to do with the block or anything like this. But of course, because it was a story and it was so incendiary,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's been repeated or repeated with no, you know, it was investigated and deemed to be nothing, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because like, so often these little stories...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This drama, and it's so interesting to see.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How this, this can happen, right? And I guess in our lives too, like in communities of people, you know, rumours and like small, um, things that you think are terrible on the outset.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Our turnout to be nothing can still, and despite all this work, you know, all the people


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I still believe that the nursing home thing is real. It's like, it's all like a big scam, really. It's like all fake news, right? Everything is fake news. But I guess fake news begins at the rumour-mongery level, and it always has been there in our human communities, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ever since, ever since caveman times, you know, Uggs probably was like, have you heard that, have you heard that, you know, Mogg, like, took the fuckin', uh, like, the beef brisket from Snog's cave, do you know what I mean?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The oldest trick in the book is to say, oh, you think the thing I did was wrong, these guys have been doing it way worse for the last ten years, go and look at them!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was playgrounds, we were told that when we were like eleven and twelve. And every eleven and twelve year old is told this, it's bizarre.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, and sentenced, just this week, for three years in prison, over a $57,000 Charizard. So he applied for a Covid disaster loan, and then bought a single Pokémon card.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So that's what he went to prison for, for defrauding the Covid disaster response alone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not surprised that she has... yeah, she could definitely roll a droid, but I don't know whether she, um, is in on the... I guess she is now in on the NFT scam train. Good for her. Ride that scam train. What is it you want?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it's a line of images of her costumes carved into pumpkins.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This whole thing, just, that's where we're going. We're going back to Return to Monkey, have you seen this?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Have you, do you know the return to monkey meme?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay. Well I think it's more sort of recently to do with people being like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Fuck's sake, the world is, the world is shit, can we just return to monkey? Like, return to simple times. Like, does that appeal to you? You know, taking your clothes off, going back into the jungle. Living, living more simply.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well no, fine. Okay, good. Didn't realize I was talking to the two hippest dads on the planet.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I did read an article this week about kids, actually. So, some toddlers, some kindergartners, and their elementary school teacher, I guess, have put together a hotline where you can ring up


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, well, I mean, maybe the pep talk is, maybe you need to hear that, Jamie, maybe the kids will say things that adults don't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's like, you know, you need to be told that stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kids, y'know, the filter, they always say this, and I don't know how true it is, cos I never spend any time with children, but they have, they're supposed to have a more naive look on the world, a more simple look, and they say things that are, y'know, like, yeaah, inspirational. Do you not think of that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Um, speaking of people being lonely in their flipping pandemic free time, the uh, Brandon Sanderson, our favourite writer, um, he has, he's announced recently that he wrote four books during lockdown. He's prolific. On top of the stuff that he'd said he was gonna write. Is this the wheel of time?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He wrote four, um, four, four, four books during, um... Lockdown. During lockdown, and he's, he's done a Kickstarter... Yeah, that's ridiculous. To self-publish them. Yeah. And he's, he wanted a million dollars...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I think, like, it's obviously he... I don't know what his motivation is, but I like people doing it themselves. I like people breaking away from, you know, the big...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well, look, it's obviously, people are getting something out of it, it's something they love, it shows how popular his writing is, that people are that passionate about his stuff, and I'm a big fan. I like the whole independent...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Any fucking TikTok star that gets a hint of popularity is swamped by publishers and people coming along trying to monetise anything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's some guy behind it being like, God, can't they be more professional? But on the other side there's the guy being like, oh my God, actually the more we do with this, the more fucking drama we make, the bigger we get. You know, they weren't in a vacuum, you know, there were people smashing up hotel rooms before them and


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And doing wild stuff, and swearing on TV before them, y'know, this was the 90s, it wasn't like it had never been done before. But I think, um, yeah, I think people had, to some extent, they did still feel like naughty kids, I dunno, in some ways. And that was appealing to the generation who were...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, I don't know. I guess the current trainwreck sort of trend is people like Lil Pump and his kind of oeuvre.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like being called Tom Junior though, do you know what I mean? Because that's now old. If you're called Junior, god, you're in your 80s, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's a, it seems to be... You could just put it on your anything though. You know, I can send a message to Ted Forsythe Esquire. I mean, as a joke. It's a courtesy title for any man in a four


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I tell you what we should bring back, when we call kids young masters.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's really interesting. There's lots of really interesting stories, like, uh, it's really interesting to see it, like, you know, Carlton and Hillary.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's the actual, it's the, it's the, the, officially the Jubilee tomorrow, I think, right, on Friday? Oh yea. But Thursday, today is just like a regular spring bank holiday, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's uh, what's the first ever, what's the first ever jubilee? Cause like, I know like when you, when you're, when you're celebrating your anniversary, the first one is like wood or leather or something like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I think they do when they get to the interesting stuff. Like, I think you can have a platinum anniversary, for example, or like an emerald or sapphire, and I'm pretty sure that the Jubilee just sort of picks up


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The first jubilee is like some rare gem or something like that, right? Like they just skim all like the, all the crappy stuff that like us plebs have to celebrate. Cause I think your first, your first landmark 10 year anniversary is like wood or leather or something like that, which.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like Flak said, there's no jubilee around wood or leather, I don't think. It's like, it goes straight into the precious gemstones, right? Like, almost immediately. Or, uh, like metals.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's a long time, yeah. I mean, I don't think any other monarch has had a platinum, right? Like, none of them seem to last as long as...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So they, I think Kate and William changed the succession laws around, like the UK monarchy at least.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, cause I guess that's all they could do. But they've changed it so that, uh, it's not just the, uh, the, the, the male lineage now, right? It applies to, uh, to females as well. So like, for example, uhm, like I think it's, it's George, right? His, uhm, William's firstborn son.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, would, uh, would be next in line after him, and then it would have gone to Louis, who is his, who is his third born son, cause in the middle they had a girl, but they changed it now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I guess so, yeah, I don't know. But they changed it now so that, uh, Charlotte, their, their middle child, but a female, uhm, is, is next in line after, after George. So she, she has just as much of a, a chance as, uh, as the males to become ruler at some point, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I think, uh, I think the power move will be to get, uh, George to marry, uhm, Prince Andrew.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So that they can have, uh, so that they can have some, some kids that can then be immediately murdered so that, uh, they can, they can take back, um, York or whatever, whatever Andrew, um, looks over or, or something. And then they can finally imprison him as well and, uh, leave him in the, um, in the dungeon.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, there's a, there's a new Iberia DLC coming out soon though, so it might be worth another look.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I get the sense that she's, uh, she's not going to everything because of the mobility issues, but now she's just picking and choosing the stuff that she actually wants to go to. So if there's any horses there, she'll be there for sure, right? Like she'll, she'll make a point to go. But if there's no horses or flowers or anything like that, she's just like, ah, fuck it. Like, I'll just say, I'll just send Charles or whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you gotta have an in, right? It's members only. You have to have your card and you gotta take your picture and you can't just borrow somebody else's card because you got their picture on there and stuff. It's like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's my birthday on Sunday, but I'm not really doing anything for that either, I don't think.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I don't even really look forward to my birthday that much anymore because it's just like, oh hey, like let's go visit family and then do this and that and it's just like, okay cool, like these are all things I do not want to do on my birthday. Thank you very much. And that's how it's been for like 20 years.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, uh, I try to get away with it for sure. But yea, no, I don't think, I don't think we're doing anything. Like, we'll probably, like, normally we just like go for breakfast or do something like that. Uhm, and then in the afternoon we normally just like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, a visit with family and stuff, so probably just end up doing that. But there's a couple of things going on over here over the weekend because of the jubbly, so like, I think there's like a motor show which is, uh, turns into kind of like a, like a street, street fair sort of thing. There's like a-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh god. You gotta get off at, uh, at Old Wiblington, uhm, you have to exit the tube and you have to find the old speckled bitch in, uh, and then you have to go in there and get yourself, uh, have a, have yourself a little rest and get a pack of frazzles and then, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And a frazzles, some frazzles. And then back onto the, uh, back onto the line and uh, carry on. Like this, you can, you can incorporate all this into your, into your Elizabeth line pub crawl.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, we're talking like 30 years old, uh, Queen Elizabeth, though. She'd have like, though, she'd have the riding pants and the gloves on with the cap and stuff and she'd be like, hello, like re- just ready to go. She'd be ready to, she'd be-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This guy knows what he's, this guy knows what he's doing, okay, he lives in London, and he's been on all of these lines before, okay, I know exactly what Lewis is doing right now, he's got, he's got Google open and Wikipedia, he's got like ten Wikis open.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah, I mean, I've been saying for like 20 years I've been like, every year, oh we should really go visit Scotland, we should really go visit Ireland, and we've never been.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've never set foot in Scotland or Ireland before in my life and I live so close, like I don't know what's preventing me from going, but like I think it's just cause we keep having more kids and it's just.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, airfare for like five people and, uh, and, and just like the headaches that come with traveling with small children and stuff. It's like, it's put me off. But even before that, I don't know what the hell stopped us from going. Like there's some beautiful spots, you know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would like to put this point forward on this subject. I used to love going on vacation before I had kids, but I think even if I worked a normal job,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would love to go on vacation just to get away, get that break and stuff. Right. Now that I do what I do, I don't want to go on vacation. Like I, I pretty much just want to do what I do every day. I don't want to be interrupted. Like if there's a day where I have to do something and I can't just sit around and stream a video game all day, I'm like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Exciting and fun, you know, like, uh, for me to get motivated to go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, the summer can be pretty brutal though if you're not, if you're not ready for it. Like, I've been burned.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A couple years ago, I used to work with a guy who was a very avid fisherman. He had like a little boat.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He had crab pots that he would go and collect every day and uh, he just liked to, he just liked to get out there, you know, he just liked to get out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Get out on the sea and do some fishing and stuff, and he's like, you wanna come with me one day? And I was like, sure, I had a day off. So, I went with him, and uh, it was not a sunny day. It was just like, it was an overcast day. We went out, uhm, did some fishing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I was like, I didn't realize we'd be gone for so long, and I got a little bit dehydrated for sure. Uh, probably more dehydrated than I've ever been in my whole life, which is fine, like I recovered from that, I got home, I just felt a bit sick or whatever, but I was fine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, but then, uh, the next day I woke up in agony, I looked down and my legs were like fucking purple. Like, uh, I didn't realize that they'd, that they'd, uhm, caught so much non-sun, cause like I said, it wasn't even really sunny out, you know, there was like periods where it was kinda sunny and then, but it was mostly overcast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I guess you just got nothing to protect you out there. I didn't put any sunscreen on or anything because I just figured whatever, it's not even sunny out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, my legs were just like burnt to a crisp. And they, and like, my knee and everything, you know, like when you, you know, like when you sit down and your knee, the skin over your knee, like tightens up over your knee, then we stand up, it sort of like bunches up. All that was burnt. So every time I stood up, it fucking killed me. Like it was the worst.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but it's not like, uh, it's not like, uh, you're not getting like a Chernobyl dose of radiation. You know, it's like, but you, you can't, you do get, there's enough for it to like potentially, um, you know, alter.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You get radiation from being on a plane, right? Like uhm, if you go like take a long haul flight, there's like a certain amount of radiation that you, you're subjected to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I thought you were gonna say I paid for it to get into the park. I was like, oh, that's nice of you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, I could just picture this very solemn plaques, like sitting on the log flume, not saying a word with like, just a, just a very sulky face, like going, oh, yay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's kinda weird to think though, like, places that you wouldn't, uh, care about stats like that, like, for example, say like Center Parks or whatever, like, you wouldn't, there's nothing there where people immediately would think, oh shit, you know, people must die there all the time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but like if you look, but people die places all the time, right? For like a variety of reasons, you know, like you can imagine somebody going to like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They gotta close the pool and stuff, like I'm sure it happens, like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, there's like, there's some, there's like a nice, there's, like every Center Parks has like this big central, uhm, like dome kind of thing that has like a pool in it and there's usually rapids that go outside and stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think getting maimed in some way and then surviving it would be pretty rough.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but, but then losing the ability to like, use a, like a limb or multiple limbs because they've been, uh, cut off or whatever, that would be so rough, wouldn't it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, there is probably like a massive adjustment period for all this kind of stuff, or whatever, and it made me think, holy crap, I'm so fortunate to have never lost a limb, I don't know how the hell I would cope with losing a limb, you know what I mean? Like, it would just be so fucking rough, Jesus Christ. Shout out to any of our listeners out there who have lost a limb.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know why I'm even laughing. It's fucking brutal. Like I would hate for that to happen. I would feel so sorry for anybody I knew who that happened to and anyone out there who's had to suffer through this, I feel sorry for you too. I don't even know why I'm laughing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like I have some sympathy for your daughter because I've been in this situation before where I've gone somewhere that was supposed to be really fun with people who were trying so hard to have fun because they're familiar with it and I didn't have fun and I got home and I just felt sick.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And kind of like, oh fuck, you know, like I wasn't very fun to be around cause I didn't have fun cause I was sick and I just couldn't handle it or whatever. I've been like in that situation before and I know it doesn't feel great. So I have sympathy for sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Did you coat the inside of those undies with a bit of the talcum powder from your kit?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no subject line. Okay. Can I just say something quick before we start? My son came home from school the other day and described, uhm, the way he was treated by another student in his school as him being mugged off. Which I found...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man. I hear tea and I'm palpitating. I'm like, oh my god, yeah, hit me. I want some. Bad.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wow, holy crap. Do you think that they all had the conversation about their wiener sizes as well?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, if you ever listen back to an episode, it's incredible. I think we don't give ourselves enough credit. It flows spectacularly.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The jokes are just like, uh, you know, like, uh, joke, uh, laugh out loud joke a second. They all hit. There's no awkward silences. We barely ever talk over each other. Like I think we're just all like trained professionals, you know, like I think we just have some sort of


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We gotta get a sponsorship from Hotpot now, because we've, uh, we're now driving business towards them, right? Like, it's only right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was very strange, actually. Hey, speaking of the Commish, you remember that show, the Commish, in like the 90s, it was on TV? The guy who played the Commish in the Commish was the guy who played the, uh, the owner of the coach of the Boston Celtics in winning time. That guy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was the commish. And they actually referred to him as the commish, uh, at one point in the show too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, that's not, that's not him. Oh yeah it is! Isn't it? Wow. Holy shit it is!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You remember him as the commish. I remember him as the commish, but I watched the shield as well. D'you know what? It's weird because I remember him from the, uh, from the shield, but I always get him mixed up in the shield for some reason with, uh, Grant, Phil and Grant from Eastenders. Like, they look very similar, don't they?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because he's fucking bald and stuff in the shield. And, uh, and I always just in my mind, I always picture, uh, Grant from, uh, what's his name again? Russell, uh, Russell, um, Ross Kemp, Ross Kemp.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, that's who I always picture as the guy from the shield for some reason. But yeah, no, you're right, it was. The commish was the guy that was in the shield. I have to mention that to my wife actually, because we like the shield.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Except for fucking Shane in the shield Walter Goggins. Fuck me man. God, what a hateful character. You remember that guy?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeah, that's right. And it said, don't ever bring Lewis to a strip club. That's right, I remember. That was the one. Yeah, I'm banned now, apparently. You're banned, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then when you turn up, they're like, nah, sorry, you've, uh, you've self-banned yourself. You're not allowed. You can do that at casinos as well, I think.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've had a couple of experiences like this, uh, like very light experiences because, uh, I'm, I am white, so like, like visually.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would never really be asked that, I don't think. But my last name is a little bit, uh, is a little bit unique, right? It's Hungarian, isn't it? It's Hungarian, but people assume that it's Polish, and some people realise it's Hungarian straight away.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, so like, when my wife was in, uh, was in maternity, for all of our kids, okay, all three of them, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They gave her, uh, literature and stuff, like as they do, like at the hospital or whatever, in Polish first. So like, we just got this whole stack of stuff and it was all in Polish. We're like, what the fuck are we gonna do with this? Like, you know what I mean? And they're like, oh, sorry, like we, we, we figured you guys are Polish because your last name. We're like, no.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, so there's that, and also another thing that happens quite often.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] More often than, it's surprising how often this happens. I'll go somewhere and like, uhm, I'll use my card or something where they can see my last name.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, and, you know, normally, like, I wouldn't have really said anything at this point, and, you know, they wouldn't either. And then, they'll speak to me, like, in some fucking moon language, and I'm like, what? Like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they're like, oh, sorry, like, uh, I thought you were Hungarian because of your last name. Or, or Polish, they start to speak to me in Polish or whatever. But if they speak to me in Hungarian, they think I'm Hungarian, and they expect me to answer back, and I seem confused, and so I'm like, oh, no, no, like, I've never even been, like, I'm not, not, like, Hungarian or whatever.


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[Assistant] They're like, oh, yeah, well, you know, uh, I'm not either. Like, uh, I'm from Transylvania, which is actually much nicer, by the way. It's like, uh, okay. I mean, I don't know.


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[Assistant] I don't know what this flex is, but like, it's wasted on me, like, I don't even know. If you say Transylvania, I think of one thing, and that's Count Dracula. So like, I mean, I don't know, I don't know, like, what, uh, where you want me to go, uh, with this, or whatever. I've seen that happen as well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's a bit relating to this speaking of Ireland as well from Father Ted. I don't know if you remember this bit, but all of the priests, there's a whole bunch of different priests.


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[Assistant] Meeting up somewhere, I think in Ted's house or whatever. And uh, you know, they're just, it's all formalities. They're having drinks and stuff like that. And uh, you know, they're asking each other which parish they're from and stuff like that. And one of the priests is black.


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[Assistant] And I think it's Dougal or Ted or somebody goes up to him and they're like, and where are you from father? And like, uh, because he's, he's black and he's like a bit out of place because all of the other, all the other priests are white or whatever. And you know, the expectation that is, he's going to say that he's from like Africa or something like that. And then he turns around, he's like, I'm from Donegal, mate.


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[Assistant] I don't, honestly with a lot of this stuff I don't really look into it to that extent, like uhm, like technically maybe it's bad, I don't know, like I liked it enough, like I liked it because I'd played the game and I had some semblance of what was going on already, so that helped, but it's just whatever.


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[Assistant] Having said that though, I've watched it and never thought about it again. Like, you know, I watched it, I liked it enough, and then I moved on with my life. Like, I assume most sensible people do. Uh, instead of staying angry at a TV show and basing your whole life about complaining about a TV show. Which is kinda weird.


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[Assistant] I'll tell you what, I watched something, uh, good recently that I really enjoyed, uhm, and maybe, maybe not applicable to you guys, I don't know if you guys would even, uhm, have remembered, uh, this or...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] or, or have any fond memories of it, but as a, as a Canadian and growing up around the time when this stuff was coming out, uh, the kids in the hall, um,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They have a new series, but there's a good two-part documentary on them, uhm, alongside it as well, on Amazon.


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[Assistant] A lot of it was stage improv stuff that was then...


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[Assistant] Uh, yeaah, which was then made, uh, to, to, like, crowbarred into TV, especially their first season, they almost got cancelled after the first season because it was, a lot of the sketches were just too long and stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think Season 2 is where it really picks up and starts to get a bit more for TV rather than them doing like, you know, improv for TV sort of thing.


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[Assistant] The documentary sort of like uhm, you know, they have their highs and lows, and you know, they do their run of TV, everybody's sick of it, they break up for a bit, get back together, and then they go on tour doing like stage, like live shows again, stage shows, which I saw one of them, they came to Ottawa in 2000.


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[Assistant] Me and my friend who were big fans went to see them live and it was great. It was a really, really, really good show. It was funny, like, uh, like there was a lot of like stuff from the TV series, there was new stuff.


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[Assistant] And it was just really good and it's just interesting to see that they're still around, still doing what they've always done sort of thing.


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[Assistant] And the big thing that a lot of people mention about the new season is that there is a lot of penis. They're not scared to just get their junk out and so there's a lot of dongs in the new season.


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[Assistant] He might do, yeaah, you never know. But uhm, but yeaah, see, I haven't watched much of the new season, but the documentary is definitely worth a watch. And then if you haven't watched any of the old stuff, I'd say it's probably worth a watch as well.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it was like 89 to 95, right? The TV show. They made a movie called Brain.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's like a deterrent, right? Like it's just to move them where you need them to move.


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[Assistant] That's nice. I think that's a good one to end on. You know, like sometimes in the news they end on like, hey, uh, Captain Tom is 104 years old and he just ran 700 laps for charity or whatever. You know, like that, I feel like that's, that's our Captain Tom right there.


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[Assistant] One quick thing before we leave, I recommended, uh, Flax Play Satisfactory last week. I believe you played it and maybe didn't like it, but I have a new...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, I have a new game of the week for you, my game of the week for you to both try. This week is a game called Workers and Resources Soviet Republic.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's really fun, yeaah. Get it, and try it out, and uh, let me know what you think next week. Alright, I'll pick it out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You'll have to play the game and find out. It is very very very very detailed, I will say that.


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[Assistant] I think it's cause the conditions that they train in are so harsh that like when, when they go to another country where the conditions are a bit more favorable for


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[Assistant] There's a lot of little things, I mean it was such a, such a vast conflict and encapsulated so many nations of the world over such a long period of time. There's always gonna be little bits and pieces that you've never come across, you've never read up on or whatever.


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[Assistant] Yeah, and it had ramifications for, uhm, for the war, or could have had serious ramifications for the war had it gone the other way and stuff like that. So I think that's why it's, it's often mentioned. And I mean,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Around the same time too, like, or just before, so.


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[Assistant] A lot of it was chronicled at the time, but a lot of it is going back and speaking to people who are now gone because obviously happened so long ago that most


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Veterans, uh, or people that were involved in, in any way in, in that war have, have passed away, either died in the war or, you know, have just died, uhm, in, in their later years sort of thing.


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[Assistant] You gotta, you gotta wonder if all of the accounts are like necessarily true, you know, I think there's definitely some, um, you know, like romanticization of, of some of the stuff, right? Like certainly you see it like in the movies and some of the books that have been written since and stuff, you know, like I don't know if all the accounts are like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 100% accurate, but at the same time, it makes it all more interesting, right? Because it's like all a time piece, right?


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[Assistant] No, I mean that's like sort of come to light more recently that, but potentially she wasn't as.


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[Assistant] After the fact, you look at it and you think, well, no, that he's like, uh, he's, he's a mad man, but.


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[Assistant] I mean, you know, people supported him in the beginning, right? And he was still insane then too. You know what I mean? So like it's, it's the context of the time, right? Like he was saying sort of the right things, but nobody realized how nuts he was going to be, you know, as things went on.


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[Assistant] Loud and insane are, are, are listened to a lot, right? Like, uh, you know, people listen to like Idi Amin and, um, you know, all, all of these, all of these people who then turned out to just be absolutely batshit insane and dangerous and


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They were, they were, they were on the ground floor of introducing the concept of doing a little bit of trolling, I think. That's, uh, that's all it was. It was just a little...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like, I feel like Ross Kemp should've, you know, like.


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[Assistant] Man, he's, uh, you know what? I watched a little bit of EastEnders over the holidays because my wife follows it and, uh, man, Phil Mitchell is still in that show. He's still- Still banging babes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] His current bit of fluff is Cat Slater, I don't know if you remember her. But they're together now. So, there you go. A little EastEnders update for you there, just in case you needed it.


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[Assistant] It was Dot Cotton, right, but she's pretty much retired now.


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[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, no, she's still going, but she's not in the show anymore. They've like, they basically like, in the show, I think they've written her into like a, you know, like a retirement home or something like that.


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[Assistant] The heavyweight, uh, soap stars, you know, of, uh, of, of, of Britain, Her, Dot Cotton, and what about Deidre Barlow from Coronation Street? Both heavy smokers where their voices have dropped about 10 octaves, yeaah, over the years.


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[Assistant] Kathy Beale? Oh yea, Kathy Beale was presumed dead, that's Ian Beale's mum, was presumed dead in the show, and then came back, I think, aw, it's gotta be late.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it was, it's, it's, they've had like two different actors for Martin Fowler though. It was like, uh, it was a different actor when he was like a teenager and stuff and then he went away for a bit and then came back and now it's a different guy is acting the role.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Luckily most of that went on during the era of DVDs because that was the only way to medicate through all the pain, right? Like just to- Right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's another, uhm, there's another actress that's been like kind of like a, almost like an extra actress for the longest time and it's the, the woman who tends the bar at the Queen Vic, Tracy.


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[Assistant] She has, I think she's got a handful of spoken lines throughout like the 30 or so years that she's been on the show or whatever, but uh, she's still there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wait, I watched one where it was like, it wasn't the mask singer, or maybe it was, but it was like, they had to guess whether the person really was a singer or not, based on what they looked like, and they had like this bio and stuff, and then


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So like they were all like, they would all lip sync a song just to give people an idea of like how they would perform and stuff. But like they knew that it was being lip synced or whatever, but then it was up to like the judges to sort of see, oh, you know, is that person really going to be good at singing or whatever? And then they would come on after.


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[Assistant] But man, fucking Jimmy Carr is like on all those shows now. Like I guess he's just trying to like, uh, I don't know, like weasel his way into like...


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[Assistant] It's like, it's like a YouTube thumbnail, that guy, his like fucking reaction expression all the time, like, Jesus.


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[Assistant] I think fucking ITV need to wind their neck and fucking have a day off, you know? Like, what a stupid station, eh?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, wait, is it Lighthouse Family or M People where the lead singer sounds a little bit like Phil Collins, like on a, you know, like after, after like a night out?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe we should do a new segment. Nah, it's 2022. It's time to change the format a bit. Let's, we need a new segment called, like, just it could be a short one, like, like we just did about Wordle, but we call the segment big props, and, uh, every, every time we mention something that we like, we give them big props, you know?


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[Assistant] Are 12 viewers, you know, like the optics are going to look great, uh, when, uh, when, you know, the 12 viewers are all talking about this on socials and, uh, you know, just driving up a lot of, uh, clicks and traffic and shit like that. It's going to be amazing and we're going to make so much money.


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[Assistant] I got one. Get rid of that muff and enjoy some stuff, baby.


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[Assistant] I don't have to, I don't have to keep all the coupon papers from the backs of magazines and newspapers now. I can, I can digitize my coupon, uh, obsession.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We hereby revoke the big prop award for the week, because we found some Grifter apps for


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[Assistant] It was the top of the bestseller list. That's like, uh, that would be, uh, like a very sort of typical Christmas gift, right? Like you'd get some, like a jokey- Yeah, kind of like a semi-joke.


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[Assistant] We should do a reading of this book. Man, I can't remember the last time I read a book, it's been too long. Hey, oh, by the way, uh, baby just turned six months old yesterday. ALREADY.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You lose a bit, I think it just changes as well, and I think if you're close to your kids and they do leave and, but you're still in touch with them or very much part of their lives somehow or another, uhm, you've got potentially grandchildren to look forward to. Well exactly, back in the day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you've also got, you know, just the trials and tribulations of being an adult, you know, like you'll probably find that you will hear from them a lot more because, you know, for like advice and shit like that, you know, it's tough. It's tough becoming an adult and starting your life as an adult and stuff too, right?


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[Assistant] Probably more than I'd admit, yeaah. Like, uh, you know, like, you look back and you think, oh, they never taught me anything, but obviously they taught me something. I mean, Jesus, like, you don't, you don't just figure it out by yourself, you know what I mean? Like, sometimes they don't even need to say something, like, it's just like, you know, the example is enough.


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[Assistant] I think that, I think like some advice is too specific to take though as well. Like you, you have to, you have to filter it a little bit, right? Like, I think-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But there's certain things where it's like, I think sometimes when you, when you, when you say that you're asking somebody for advice, you're not actually really asking for specific advice. You're just trying to get, um, a broader sense of the, the dilemma that you're in, right? So like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You ask somebody for advice and they give you an alternative way of doing something and sometimes just hearing that is enough for you to be like,


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[Assistant] Yeah, that's not the way I want to do it, but it's actually inspired me to do it.


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[Assistant] Verbatim, you know what I mean? So like, probably a lot of that happened with my parents. Like, I don't think I took anything that they said.


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[Assistant] Um, overly seriously, but again, just by example and just, just sometimes having somebody to speak to when I wasn't sure whatever it was comforting, right? And it was enough to just get me through.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, sit properly, stop running, don't run in the house, like, all that stuff, but it all adds up in the end. Like, you feel like you're a broken record nagging all the time, but honestly, like, some of it does sink in and, you know, like you, you definitely shape your kids whether you want to or not, you know, like, uh, just by being you.


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[Assistant] So, I don't know. It's like, I don't think your role ever, ever like ceases to exist as long as you're just close to them and you have some sort of hand in their life, you know? Like, even if that's not the same as it is now when they're small, because they depend on you fully, you know? It's just, just be in there, you know? I think that's...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well there you go, I think that's the best you can do. That's very good of you. Big props to Flax for always being there, I think.


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[Assistant] Um, gas burners on their, like, Christmas table, um, so it was like a Christmas meal, and, um, two big metal pots of boiling hot water bubbling away.


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[Assistant] They had the, the doors open, look at like the, uhm, the kitchen doors open to the outside, so cold air is blustering in, but it's so hot in there anyway because of these constantly boiling hot pots of water. Yeah. Right? And they, they throw in...


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[Assistant] Like everything like tofu and some packed choice of mushrooms, uh, I bought some like fake chicken, we threw all that in, and you just basically, we had two pots, one for vegans and one for...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Meat eaters, right? So their pot was a lot greasier and looked a lot tastier.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you can put like, like more thicker things in there and they'll slowly cook, like a big piece of mushroom in there and that will cook over like a couple of minutes and then you can just grab it. But it's a very communal thing, very social. So good. Anyway, it was obviously boiling hot, but also cold. Um, and so I think I'd taken my jacket off and


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[Assistant] I don't remember, I don't remember this or whether this was, I don't remember this actually happening, but I think this was a dream. This is what I'm saying about memory. I had like a really cheap


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that was only something that happened like a week ago. So, that's how I feel about memory. I'm not sure, I'm not, I think you have to check with other people who were there and even their memory's gonna be all hazy. It's all messed up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] God, that really was one of the highlights of my year. Oh man.


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[Assistant] Me too, but I've been talking to other people and other people have had no impact for their booster at all.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, his wife did the majority of the making. Sips sort of bought some of their materials. She needed


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, there's nothing really that wholesome about, you know, getting a sprog going. By the way, thank you for the lovely, um, Christmas, uh, family stuff, Sips. Sips sent me, like, a little photo of Babby, um, Christmas Babby.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The whole project. Very nice, yeah. That's it. No, I remember there was a time when I was like, was it last week I spoke to you and you just said, I'm going out every day to buy something for baby or family, it's just like every day out in town, buying something.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it's a vicious cycle, right? Like, I'm the same, like, my timekeeping gets worse if I'm more depressed, and then like, it gets, then that causes me to get even more behind, every time, you know? Like, if I just actually sat down and did my taxes, I wouldn't worry about doing my taxes every day, do you know what I mean?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe it's a cycle. Maybe you eventually become that asshole in the parking lot. Maybe. At one point in your life, you are the guy being beeped at, and then at another point in your life, you're the beeper.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Exactly. Yeah, I think that maybe is the best way to think about, you know, we're all just part of this same planet, you know? Yeah, sure. Part of a shared organism. Like, hairs, on the top of a head, a big head, floating in space.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, cause she's, there's some other pres- basically the president is a kind of Donald Trumpian, kind of laissez faire, well is this gonna help my ratings or not kind of thing. But that's Meryl Streep.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, she's really, does it really well kind of as a, as a ignorant kind of, just kind of, I don't know, like, modern day


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I thought it was brilliant. You know, there's this great bit in it where they do a poll and like 25% of people don't even believe there's a comic. That's the kind of attitude towards this comic.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It is a bit, uhm, a lot of people say it's a bit too smug, but actually, fucking, I thought it was hilarious, and I loved it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm gonna watch that. Yeah, so, so don't look up. Recommend, recommend it. I will watch it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But the other thing that possibly was thought to have maybe killed them was, uhm, when they, when they kill, I think when they kill seals and eat the liver, it's like massive amounts of vitamin A or something like this. I bloody can't remember at all.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One of, like, eating seal meat, if you're not careful, can just kill you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, seal livers and stuff apparently is one of these things. The silent killer. Yeah, like this load. So if you're stuck in the frozen north eating only seals, just avoid the liver I think is the answer, but I dunno. Maybe that's the tastiest bit of the seal. Maybe you're missing out on some delicious seal liver.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So the rest of the books are pants, really. Well, they're okay, but it's just more, more guppins in the same universe.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh good, yeaah. The Witcher. Every episode of The Witcher I was like frustrated. At the end of it I was like, this is written so badly. It felt like Game of Thrones where people just teleport around the world randomly. People are all over the fucking place.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, no one's clear about who's working for who, there are loads of little minor factors that don't even matter. No one really fights. He kills like one or two bad guys per episode, but it's not even clear that they're bad guys. I dunno, it's kind of very, um... It's alright.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like the same as the first season. Yeah, pretty much. Yeah, it was just alright. It's just more of alright. Yeah. Yeah. I thought it was fine. Yeah, it was okay. Yeah, I love the terror of P-Flex. The second season of it is set in a Japanese internment camp, so it's one of these anthology ideas where it's like completely different.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, yeah. Season two of The Terror is completely different. Uh, actors, different setting, different- I shouldn't have even called it The Terror, but I think that- It's kinda like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That sounds pretty cool actually. The engineering on these things is nuts. Like it reminds me of these uhm, I watched like there's this channel on YouTube called the B1M, which I think is just one guy making like really well produced engineering and like, like kind of architecture videos.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he made this video the other day about this, uh, billionaire's row in, uhm, in, in New York where it's like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They have to buy a bit of land, which is obviously really expensive and really small. It's always in Manhattan as well, right? Yeah, yeah. And then you have to buy the air rights to the land adjacent, right? So you have to buy, basically if you buy a block, you then have to buy the nine blocks, uh, the eight blocks around it, in a grid.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, and get the air rights for those, and if you can secure those, then you can build your skyscraper, right? Because the point is that it's not just the air rights for the land that you have got, you have to make sure that if they wanted to build on their square,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So obviously a mechanical floor is one, like, there's one called 432 Park Avenue.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One of the worst ones, I'd say worst, they're like super slender, they're like this stick basically, they're 1 to 26 is the worst one, which is uhm, it's 26 high and 1 wide type ratio, which is crazy, right? It's like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's, you know, it's, it's like a, a, you know, two, one and a half thousand feet tall, but only like a kind of a hundred feet or less than that, like 80 feet at the base. It's like super.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They've got this huge pendulum in them as well, right, which means that that's how they basically stay up these incredibly awful looking


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Unstable looking skyscrappers, they have like a mega pendulum in them, so if they start tipping to one side, the pendulum kind of creeps and keeps them in place.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, well it's not actually a pejorative, it's called a tuned mass damp- tuned mass damper, a harmonic absorber, um, which is on springs, and has, uh, something... it's complicated, Pflats. I'm gonna read it up. I'm gonna read it up right now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They've got, they've got them in a lot of buildings to kind of keep them, uhm, the Burj Al Arab, oh that's not the one I was thinking of, has 11 apparently. But yea, this is, this is like one which is 730 tonnes in Taipei 101.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it feels like, uhm, so, so anyway, there's, there's, there's tons of these buildings and they're, they're, they're ludicrous because they're half empty, right? Because people buy them as like a, an investment, right? But, but, but like, uhm...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Almost like, so for example, these buildings are so, they're so thin that you can't buy individual flats, there's no hallways. The elevator opens into the middle of the flat. Every flat is an entire floor, but some of them are two floors.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well that, 432, but that's, but that's empty, right? Like a lot of these things are, are, they're so expensive, but they're also kind of...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because they're kind of, like, very robust, apparently the idea is that they're more liquid, so people can trade them in a tokenised way.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, like, more, more easily, because they're so consistent. What, the buildings? They're valued. No, yeah, these, these, um, these, these super rich, super, they're basically just like a form of currency amongst the super rich to be able to just trade up or, you know, quickly


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like having a throwaway thing to mention at a dinner party if you're super rich. It's like, oh, where are you staying? I'm staying at the 432. You know, it's like, oh. It's kind of this, seen as like this accolade, because they're worth twenty million, thirty million, and they're so consistently valued at that price.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, plus, plus it's tax avoidance is a huge, huge thing, right? So, a lot of these, apparently a lot of these buildings are built here, but then they build like a hundred units of affordable housing in the Bronx or somewhere.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then that way they can avoid paying like a certain amount of tax and so, you know, the average, if you, if you own like one of these mega rich skyscraper


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[Assistant] It's almost certain that you are not going to have to pay any property tax on it at all apparently. It's like one of these things where companies can get away with it as a tax avoidance. It's a whole thing where the government have kind of encouraged housing to be built in the city or in Manhattan


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[Assistant] And so, as a result, there's all these, these loopholes that people have exploited in order to build these. And they wouldn't have been built without it, you know, these super tall, slender, mental buildings. They look mad. They actually look mad. It's like, when you think about it, it's like, why would you build something so, with such a small relative floor space, right? Because


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[Assistant] It's like, uh, compared to like the, um, One World Trade Center, you know, it's obviously roughly the same height, but it's got like one hundredth of floor space or something like that, because it's so skinny. And it's like...


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[Assistant] A lot of people were saying, like, cause there were a lot of problems with these buildings, that they feel complaining about the dampener, and the noise of it and stuff, and the springs and whatever creaking and clonking away in the wind. They said it was intolerable, but I mean, I...


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[Assistant] Open for Wordle, uh, websites. Okay, good. I use ExpressVPN on all of my devices. I recommend you do too. ExpressVPN.com slash Triforce. You know, your online activity is your business. So you can get three months free. ExpressVPN.com slash Triforce. I recommend it. Check it out.


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[Assistant] Well that's exactly the case though, like what, how do you make it positive? Like, oh, you should definitely smell the flowers at number nine, and then the person at number nine's gonna be like, don't you fucking smell my flowers.


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[Assistant] Yeah, loads of creepy people coming and sniffing my flowers.


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[Assistant] So some people, yeah, you could get paid to go and collect up all the ones at the end of the day that have run out of charge and taken back to the depot. So yeah, that does happen. But yeah, uhm, it's weird. And, I mean, I reckon they cost so little, uhm, you know, I think they cost, like, probably


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[Assistant] 100 quid max, you know, to get one made, like if they buy them in bulk probably even less.


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[Assistant] And, you know, they cost like, I mean, sometimes it's like 5 or 10 quid for a quick ride on one, at least in my experience. And so, you know, you get 10 people using one and suddenly you're in profit for that thing and, you know, it doesn't matter that they get knackered and lost and so on.


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[Assistant] There'll be loads of places to stop around. So if you look at your app, it'll tell you on a little map where you can put it. But yeah, like Cip said, a lot of cities, you can just dump it anywhere. But again, I think that a lot of cities have their own rules for how these things can operate.


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[Assistant] Well, someone else might grab it and go off on it, because it's already activated.


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[Assistant] Well yeah, I think, I think so. Again, you'd have to keep the timer running. Which is expensive.


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[Assistant] Definitely, definitely give it a go. That's my, my tip. Just get on there. Give it a little scoot around. It's good fun.


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[Assistant] Yeah, they don't go fast enough for you to really injure yourself if you come off one. I'm sure people have died falling off them and get hit by cars and stuff plenty of times.


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[Assistant] Well, I'll come back to you. We'll do it next week. Alright. Alright, thanks everybody. Bye! See you next week!


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[Assistant] My average day, so there were two of us, there was Shiva is the main host and then I was like the second host.


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[Assistant] And so she did like the grand final and all that kind of stuff. But I would say, I think we both hosted as much as each other because they kind of split the schedule. At her insistence, she was like, no, no, no, Ted should have exactly the same amount of


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[Assistant] Yeah, we- there were some rehearsals, uhm, so generally speaking, there-


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[Assistant] The, the show is very structured in, in each of the two sort of stages. So the DPC, which is what they, in Dota terms is like the lead.


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[Assistant] Whereas then everybody was like, that's kind of unfair because then you're just inviting big names.


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[Assistant] Exactly. So now, it's the teams who have performed the best over the year. And your placement in the DPC leagues, your placement in the majors gives you DPC points, you get over a certain threshold, you're there. Nice.


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[Assistant] Playing for a bit of the money, like there's a, it's a bit of money, you know, it's a nice chunk of change, but it's not like life changing like TI is. You win a TI, you're automatically in the top like,


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[Assistant] No, I was there, uhm, she, literally, she had a ghost running around, like a guy literally in a white sheet.


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[Assistant] Was one of the Death Prophet ghosts, which was very funny. So yeah, that was good. Nice. Some of the cosplayers I actually know, like, they've been at every Dota event that I've been to, doing their cosplay, so I've known them for like, years. And the amount of work that they put into their cosplay is crazy, like, they work with them for weeks and weeks and weeks.


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[Assistant] Dude, it's just skate culture. Look up hillbombing. They do this in San Francisco a lot. Hillbombing is when you get a huge number of people on skateboards going down a very big, very steep hill on their skateboards, on the road,


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[Assistant] When I was in, when I was in Seattle and we were, we were coming back, there's a part of Seattle, anybody that lives there will know, it's the quite sort of cool bit that's very hilly. I don't know if that really sums up too much as hell, but it's like there's one particular area where a lot of cool bars and clubs, it's kind of a little bit rundown, it's, it's not in downtown, it's out towards Bellevue, up, up that direction.


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[Assistant] Uh, and it's a very steep series of hills leading back down into town. There was a guy, t-shirt, shorts.