[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, junior year in high school. And it was just start, when I moved, everyone was talking about, oh, this city's just, it's starting to really pop.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's giving me a chance to say it a little more clearly and succinctly, I think. Clarify what you're saying. Yeaah. For sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm excited about that. Self driving cars. I can't think of an invention that will change my life and American life more than that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, because I looked it up last night, the average...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Daily commute for Americans, you know, pre-pandemic obviously is an hour. I mean, that's an hour a day that the average person, they have now. Now they have an hour where they don't have to focus. They can, I mean, what do you do with that time?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's part of it. But, but you, I mean, it's gonna, it's gonna change all the stuff we've talked about living in other, living outside of the city. Yeah. I mean, why would you live in the city if, if, if.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Almost any city is bad. A car will take you there. Nashville is bad.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Everybody's in self-driving cars, that's gonna cut down traffic dramatically, cause there's no human error.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but if they're all driving in the most efficient way possible.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but who cares how long it is? You're not sitting there focusing. Like what would prevent you from living two hours outside of the city?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If, I feel like if every car is self-driving, autonomous, they can all be way faster too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, these cars, they can get comfortable. Yeah. You're laying down, taking a nap, you know, just cruising, dude.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, they'd find a way to make it happen. You know? I just have to... I'm with Aaron on this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just have to believe there, first of all, every car is going to be taking the most efficient route. So there would be no reason to merge across eight lanes at the last minute to, you know, to get to an exit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, you say, you can change the route, you know what I mean?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just feel like it uh, I feel like it would help with traffic.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I feel like I know the continent, but it would be tough to, I don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is this car a fly? I mean, doesn't it look like a hearse?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's not an attractive vehicle, in my opinion.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I remember when I was like 8, my uncle would be like 10 years from now, we were stuck in traffic, my uncle was like 10 years from now, we'll be flying all over this place.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, cause I used to rely on them for every, you know, can you take me to a friend's house? All that. If I could just do it. Wow. Yeah, that would have changed the game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I did that sometimes. I listen to movies a lot. I'll just put it, I'll put the phone down on my lap.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You don't believe, dude, I'm listening, but, but I'm listening to movies that I've seen before so I can, I can kind of, I know what's going on visually. But then every now and then I see and I want to take a quick look, just a glance.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then, you know, there aren't many visual gags, but when I want to see it, I'll take


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I can see that, that wouldn't surprise me. I hope so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, it's only, yeaah, it's only gonna be better.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The idea being that you download your consciousness onto a computer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's true. Maybe a big part of that is that by the time you're that age now, a lot of your friends and family have passed too. But if everybody else is alive. Yea, yea, it'll be a big party. We'll still be doing this. It'll be a lot of FOMO.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The office space heist is probably the most realistic, the realistic one where they wrote a program to just chip off fractions of a cent. From the Superman 3. Is that what they did in Superman 3?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, which is the most, that's the most basic human function. It's just the, the need to survive. And if you, if you give a robot that, it's going to stop you from turning it off.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yea, that's what I am. I'd go a little younger though, I think.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I'm trying to think, 6 minutes. Astronauts do use pools to simulate.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think that Buzz Aldrin took a selfie in space. Yeah, right. Was it on the moon or was it just, uh...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well, I think it was Cleveland. They had a huge ceremony. They released all these balloons.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they all went up and they all just landed in the lake.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, and they were looking for like a sailor that got lost in the water and they couldn't find him because there were balloons everywhere.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, dude, I'd love that jacket back, but I, I got a NASCAR jacket, so maybe that'll just be mine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like if y'all were around, I wouldn't have bought it because I would have felt self-conscious.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Of course I want to, but I'm just choosing not to for my own health.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, that's what caused the, because Nick wanted to eat some of the popcorn and I was like, well, there's a lot, be careful. There's a lot of butter on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's white popcorn and it's yellow, but, but you could, it's, there's a distinct butter yellow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, but it's a different kind of yellow once they put the butter on it. You don't think there's butter on that popcorn?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just can't imagine that you take something yellow like butter and put it on something. It doesn't make the thing more yellow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's an ESPN award. My source is Manti Teo who on a Dr. Phil interview or Katie Couric, one of those, he said he was at the Heisman ceremony. Okay. Maybe I'm remembering it wrong, but that's, that's what I think.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, is it a day? There is population growth in, oh, 600 a day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's saying a day. And 256 a minute.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] White bread sounds like a made up name for you though, Brian.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's good to hear that junk bomb so bad that I thought Nate was going to kick me off the podcast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Well, we've been talking about this. I, you know, just out of deference and respect for you. I'm not gonna.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My dad's family, none of them have southern accents. They're from Alabama.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's all Purdue talk. I tweet in Latin actually, so it's a tough one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Don't they put chips on pets now? They do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You don't have any kind of parental intuition to tell whose kid is yours?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. So only one of those three actually is true.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well you do, you do swallow a certain number of spiders every year, right? Isn't there? I don't know about that. It's like 6 a year maybe? Or something?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Probably, yeah, in the ceiling, you know, who knows what's going on up there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The sheer volume of a hundred beers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Johnny white bread. Why don't you crunch those numbers for us? Why don't you send us a spreadsheet.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, Doc Ellis was on LSD. LSD, LSD, that's acid.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I can't remember if it's perfect game or no. Either way, unbelievable.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And just for context, it says in this article, there's only been 23 perfect games ever. So it is a crazy feat.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Never give one a LinkedIn as their first resort on Google.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I'm open to believing in it. I've never had a personal experience, but I'm open to it. And I believe people that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know people that are smart, grounded, intelligent people. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that have seen stuff and you're like, well, I'm not going to discount your experience just because I don't have one, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Have you heard this? I, I, I heard, the story I heard was that it was one of the, um, stagehands? No, it was one of the munchkins who was so, they were being so mistreated on the set. I don't think they were. Well that's just, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's up everybody, welcome to, uh, episode, this is the third episode of Nightland, we're, we're on to something, uh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're rolling. I, uh, thank you for everybody. You know, this is the first podcast we've done where we've actually.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Episodes have been out, uh, we've seen how, you know, the response and I mean, it's been good, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We, it's, everybody's been positive, I think, right? Like, uh, so thank you for everybody that's been watching and everybody's been, everybody gets that we're, you know, I imagine beginning of every podcast is, uh, to, you got to figure out what you're doing, the system, how we're going to do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, I think we're figuring out, we've kind of stumbled on an idea, like it's almost like the theme of a podcast, you know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's tough to, because it's like, what are you going to do? Like there's interviews, there's whatever. And then, so we have a, a new formula that we're trying this time and it's, it's Krispy Kreme Donuts.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it feels like, you know, when you stack them, it feels nice. Uh, we have this new sticker that we put on the table. See if that, we just try stuff. We just put stuff out there, man and see if it works, you know. We met a fan yesterday. You met a fan?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeah, yeah. Where was it? Oh yes, the guy we met yesterday. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry. I didn't, not a big, I don't like talking to the fans out in the public now. Yeah. Very nice guy. Yeah. Didn't know my name, but. Yeah. He called him Matt. Called Brian Matt.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. Wasn't sure, and uh, went with Matt. And so, I don't feel like he looked like a Matt.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, San Antonio taco. They have outdoor eating. Yeah. Spread out. Uh, spread out. And I'm a huge San Antonio taco fan. Really? Yeah. I'm a, it's my favorite. I would go, we'd always go to after Vandy, uh, football games. Cause it's right by the campus there, right? Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean... Oh, I'd believe that. Yea, I would think that's...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, it's gotta be all day long those guys are just, and people are driving in just going like, this is my dream. I typed in, you know, I'm from, I drove from Texas, typed in music row and then just drove.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Guys, like I'll go there because that's positively music and then I'll, the other ones I'm not sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they do, uh, I saw, I saw people in there yesterday talking about music and I thought about it. I think I can write a song. I think it's, and I think it's super insult. I'm not trying to be insulting to the music writers, but I think, but it can't be as comedians. We write jokes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The lyrics that I don't listen to. I'm not, I'm not saying I'm good, but so that's what even makes me think I could do it even more. I think I could write the lyrics. I think I could write a song.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I can't sing, I played the trumpet when I was in 7th grade, so I might throw some trumpet in there. I might, whatever, when I would give my song to people, I would just be like, there's just one thing, I would like a little trumpet. And then I would see what, and they'd be like, ugh, I don't know man. Like that would be the deal breaker for them, is that I would be like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I played trumpet very briefly and don't even really care about the trumpet. You know why I played the trumpet? I wanted to play the saxophone. Saxophone when I was in high school, saxophone was the instrument. It was the one to do. It was so cool, but it was expensive and my parents can afford it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So they could only afford a trumpet. And then they got all their friends, then we had a friend that played the trumpet and they had him come give me a big talk about how cool the trumpet is. So like, they're just trying to trick me into being like, he's like, I played the trumpet and it was, I mean, it was a cool, and I was like, yeah, maybe it was cool. Like on the saxophone was cool, but my parents couldn't afford it. So.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The saxophone is still pretty cool. Trumpet's up there now. Trumpet's cool.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He can't be that good. I feel like I've never heard him play. I know, but I've never heard him play.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I have written jokes. That's true. And then, but now that you're like, well, I can play everything. You seem like, like that makes me worry that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but if someone, if you walked in, I've done.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Shows, I mean I didn't show at a high school where they would have all this stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I couldn't do the trumpet now. Like, uh, I mean, I could barely do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would say I could be a songwriter. I would be like, I think if they needed a songwriter immediately and there's no songwriters, I think I would be in big demand as Elise being a writer. I've written.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I did it all, all in one tonight show. So that's, I mean, how long's the song?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One thing, we, we, we did watch something and, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's, we all watched, I don't know if anybody's, if people at home seen the, the perfect bid, uh, the price, it's, it's on, I think it's on Netflix or no? It's on, it's on YouTube and Amazon Prime and Amazon Prime and two sponsors. No, we get big sponsors. Uh, Amazon Prime is our sponsor of the show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, we, so The Perfect Bit is a great documentary about, I think it's on Netflix, dude. It's a great documentary about a guy, uh, that was a Price Was Right contestant.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they thought he was cheating because he knew all the prices. He just like was a guy, cause you know, when you watch that show, when you watch prices, right? I mean, it's like a can of beans. How much is it? And then, you know, it's like, I mean, you think people would be great at it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or like how much a couch is or something, but they're not, but this guy was like a photogenic


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right? Is that photogenic? No wait, is that how you say that? Photographic. Now what do you say?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's how I look at like counting cards with casinos. Like that, where they get mad. Like, it's not illegal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I don't know. They don't like it. And it's, it's like you're creating a system, it's a pro, it's a problem for these casinos. But like, I don't, like, why don't, like, why couldn't you just go in and go, I am counting cards.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In my head, I'm not touching the cards, I'm just counting them. And what are you gonna do? I feel like if you walked into Casino and had like a camera crew with you, like, you know, you're like, we're gonna, I'm counting cards and I'm gonna do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then like, just see what they do, you know, as they get murdered, but casinos maybe still do that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know. I mean, yea, now would be the perfect time to do it because you can't do stuff like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I bet they still do it though. What? I bet you gotta go to the right casino. You gotta go to some casino down the, down the way, down the strip at the other end.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You don't go count cards there. They're like, yeah, we still do that stuff. You gotta go to MGM, the win, like go to a nice one that's like, we can't afford to do this to you. But yeah, I never understood why don't they let them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like why is it not? Like just, just say it. It's almost like being sneaky is the problem with it versus if you walked in and go, I am counting these cards. I'm doing something legal. I'm going to do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm saying it gives you a better chance than being, when you're sneaky is when they go, what are you, what else are you doing? But if you just come in and go, I'm a, I'm a card counter and that's what I'm doing. And I'm going to see if I can beat the game by counting. Like how's that not a strategy?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then they, some of them would figure out too, like to, like listen to this guy, cause that was where he was the most damaged to the game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It wasn't him playing the game. It was him yelling this stuff out. And once people realized that like, oh, you should be listening to this guy, this guy knows. Cause everybody just yells all these crazy things and this guy was just yelling the exact amount. And once like you would see some people like catch onto it and be like, that guy knows what he's doing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, no. Would you listen to your wife if she was jailing? How much is milk? $3? I used to think, you know, my iced coffee with milk joke, one part of it that came from an old way, I would say milk was not, milk is not in your life unless a woman is in your life.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You go, you have milk growing up because your mom always makes you drink all this milk and then you go to college or you live on your own. You never buy milk. Milk's just gone. And then you get married again and milk is right back into your life.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Guys just tend to not do milk. You just don't think to buy it, I think. Oh, I don't think that at all. Well, you're a 50 year old, 100 year old man. I think single guys eat cereal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cereal is the only thing, but I don't, but I don't, I don't know what they do. I think they eat breakfast, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just debunked that joke. No jokes stands to this day. It's still good. It was good in the eighties and still good now. Uh, yeah, it's, it's, it's, I don't know. I don't know how I would do on price straight. I, I, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't, I mean, it's, I know you, it seems like a simple game, but it's like, how much are these beans? I mean, no one knows, like no one's paying that much. It's not like it's a rich or poor problem. It's not like there's poor people on it. They're like, I know all the prices of these. It's all weird things that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, it's funny, it's two people. Remember that? Who was that guy we met that won a car? That's right. His name was Kramer. His name is Kramer, which is unbelievable. His real name is Kramer. He was like a Kramer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He, cause he talked about too, like when those guys win, you have to pay taxes and stuff. Like, so people have big trouble, like if they win.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That home makeover show that they used to do, they would redo someone's house. And then after they re, after they left, they would go re appraise the home and then their taxes would go up. And then like people would be, now I don't, I didn't look it up to see if that was true or not, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's pretty crazy to be like, you think, oh, I'm going to get this free. Like nothing's, you know, when like people get cash on yours, uh, some game shows, like you win a hundred dollars cash and they never would get the actual cash.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I did, uh, I did one, a game show. I forget who, Jeff, I want to say Jeff Dye hosted it on MTV. And we would tell, people would go into stores and it was on MTV and see how long they could stay in there before they got kicked out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so you would tell them to do crazy things. And then if they could do, if they would do them all, if they said no, then they're out of the game. And if they do them, then they get money. And you'd always say like, oh, you get like a hundred bucks cash, but they would never get the cash. And it was like, always like, so you're like, just give them the cash.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Instead of we a hundred bucks, they get $63, you know, and it's a check and it comes later.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I remember, I had my funniest moment on there was we went to this candy store and I told this girl, I had her go around asking people


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause she wasn't 18 to buy her the candy cigarettes. So anybody else that she'd go in, she'd go up to adults and go, I can't afford to buy these. Will you buy these cigarettes for me? And they're like, I mean, they're candy, like anybody can buy them. And they're like, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not 18. So can you buy me these cigarettes? And so she would ask everybody.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's kind of fun. Yeah. And I had her do the milk joke. Uh, I go, Hey, tell this milk thing. Workshop this. I go, try this. That guy seems like he would get this milk thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know if they would do just as well. I'm just, I'm just saying like, it's not like there's a mom on price is right. That's like buying milk every day being like, I'm just crushing it. Like she goes shopping or something and then she knows all the prices. I don't think it's that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And most people would be like, I don't know what a gallon, like. Yea. When you think, I mean. Cause you're not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, there is some people that I think get mad when milk goes up. Like they notice that. Like milk is $5 or whatever, you know. How much is milk? Do you know how much milk is? I don't know how much milk is. How much is milk?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oat milk is three dollars. Uh, I don't know what oat milk is. What about gas? Do you notice gas prices? I do. You know what gas, uh, I remember


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's the cheapest you've ever seen gas? I remember seeing gas for 69 cents. Wow. It was the cheapest I ever saw gas and I was driving and I remember I saw it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it was way more than it seemed. Uh, but I remember, I remember putting, I would put five dollars in my car. Like that's all you would put. It'd be half a tank. Ten was a full tank.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that was, you know, you put $5 and that was in high school. I mean, it sounds, now it sounds like I grew up in the thirties, like, but it was, I remember being 69 cents and I just remember thinking, man, cause it was always under a dollar, I think was what it was. And then the 69 cents, I was like, it was in Murfreesboro and I saw it and I went and filled up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because I was like, you're like, you have to. But that's when you're, now I fill my car up. That's a very adult thing versus a kid thing is like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Adult is like, you just always fill your car up. And then when you're in high school or in college, I mean, you're just putting in the...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] $1.87? There's a gas station in LA and my buddy Travis had always pointed out, it's like right in, it's kind of in Beverly Hills.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it's, he's always like $5. He's always maybe $2 above everybody else.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it's so, like, you're almost like the audacity of this guy. He just doesn't care. Cause it's like, you could just drive a little bit more and it would not, it's unreasonable how expensive this is. And you see people there, cause I think he's just like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's in barefoot hills. He's like, look, these people don't know how much gas costs. And they, so he just puts it up for more. And then it's, it's a, I think it's a BP or Mapco or something. And it's, I always see it and I've never, when Travis pointed it out to me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I noticed it and I was like, God, that's so funny that this dude just is like, whatever, man. And I'm just charging more.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well I remember seeing gas stations would be more expensive to be across the street. And then you would still see people over there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's what she, she'd worn. But it's, I would, mine would be, if I feel like I'm getting duped, that's when I don't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do it. So like, if I saw them across the street from each other and say it's the same kind of gas station, uh, I would be like, well I'm going to the cheaper one just cause I'm not an idiot and I feel like you're making me feel like an idiot. I get very like, if I feel like you're duping me on purpose, then I go to the other one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 10 cents more. That adds up the gallons. I can never tell anybody what a gallon number is. Like how many, when they ask your car, they're like, uh, how many gallons you get?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've never known, like, that kind of mileage. Like, you know, if a car is like, this gets this many miles to the gallon, it's like, that never, you know. They should come up with a better way. They should just be like, this car cost $40 to fill up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That, that's how they should sell cars. And you'd be like, that's pretty good. That's pretty good. I don't think they want you even thinking about you gotta spend money on gas.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. So they do it like they break it down. That's like, what about rental car? I've started doing when I would rent, uh, with Avis, they do a.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I tried to rent Avis when I rented cars. When I rented cars it was 10 years ago when you could actually go out in public. But when I did Avis, you can do a thing where you prepay to fill it up and you just have to have it empty for it to be worth it. But I like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like I always love that. So you don't have to, cause you know, trying to find a gas station somewhere else. But I mean, they charge, you know, if you don't fill your car up and you return it, I mean, they will be like, it's like $7 a gallon. It's like something that's ridiculous where it's more than the car, you know, that you're like, I forgot. They're like, ah, that's it. They're like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, what's the system with that? Let's see if we can get to the bottom of that and investigating series of Nate Land, where we go, excuse me, Avis, uh, you were talking about celebrities, could they, here's what I, I, uh, a joke idea that I had that I thought with, like, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] With celebrities, like making money, like I was thinking like Tom Cruise, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, back to them all. They're great. He does all his own stunts. I watched a whole YouTube video on that. He was like, it's pretty crazy. The stunts he's willing to do. I mean, this guy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is basically a walking Walmart. Like he's, his name's on a movie and it's going to make a billion dollars. So it's like they, he has to be protected.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, I mean Tom Cruise, you think about how famous he's been.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's, I mean his whole life he's been famous. I mean there's no reality he lives in. Like, you know, and I'm not saying, I think he, you always hear he's a great guy. I think he's a nice, like from all the stuff you see, everybody says he's, anybody have,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, met, that knew him, uh, or, I, I, people I know that have met him, they're always like, he's amazing, dude. Like, someone met him and the guy told him, he's like, just so you know, when you meet him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're gonna be like, oh, we're best friends and he's the greatest guy ever. Cause he's that, he's like that much engaged with you. When he talks to you, he really looks at you and like remembers you. And like, he's just got a wonderful, just a wonderful person, but he can't. Like if he goes into seven 11 and buy gum.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they're like, it's $2. Like, I don't know if he's gonna even know, like, what it means, you know, like, if he's gonna be like, oh, it's $2. Like, I think if he walked in, you could be like, it's $27 for gum. And, and then he might be like, oh, it's a little bit cheaper than it was, but not like, oh, it's gone down. Like, I don't think he would even, would he even know what $20 is? Like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is he gonna, like his cash? Maybe he is, maybe he's into money, like maybe he thinks about money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, I mean, that's someone that's like, I don't know if you would ever even see the money coming in or out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like would you, you're, you're never seeing like here's your paycheck for this. It's just money gets put in. He has, you know, business people, money gets put in and then money is getting taken out. Like where, you know, I don't know, does he have any inkling of.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well, I mean, probably back then, I mean, dude, he's been famous my whole life. I'm 41. And so we have probably my whole life been mega famous.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, like, last dance, they talk about Jordan, Jordan would, uh, call, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Where like those guys, they can't go out. They can't go by themselves. It's, it's too insane. You would see if, if someone sees Tom Cruise, if a celebrity sees Tom Cruise, they're going to be nervous. Like someone else that's famous would be like, oh my gosh, it's Tom Cruise. You just can't be above that just because that guy has been in your face on everything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For thirty years, forty years, like, so there's no way he can buy...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anything dude, I mean he can't, he's not going to the store, like he's not. That should be the next Mission Impossible.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And have them go, have them go buy, do regular things. That's the thing that I don't understand, like, when, you know, like when celebrities like, people like listen to celebrities for like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nothing they do is normal. Nothing. And it's not, I'm not even blaming them. I mean, some of them can't go out in public without getting mobbed. Like, that's gotta be exhausting to like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Always just everywhere you go is just people, you know, Taylor Swift just gets, she wants to go to the store. She can't, she's got to just, they get like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I, you know, Brad Pitt, like would watch, uh, he watched Tom Segura's special, like, and we, some, I heard that I was talking to Tom about, like someone find out, he's like, I'm a big fan of Tom Segura. And they're like, why aren't you watching stand up? And he's like, well, I can't go anywhere. Like, so I just watched Netflix all day. And you're like, yeah, cause he, cause he can't do anything. I mean, Brad Pitt's another one, like Brad Pitt.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, and I'm not saying these guys are not even normal guys. I think there are good, nice guys, but I'm saying there's, there's just things that they would never even, he doesn't know how to, like his, if his water bill is paid, like, you know what I mean? Like, he's not going to even know, like what, like what do you guys


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I bet you could find someone that randomly, like is just like, I want to do something that's normal. And then they maybe choose to do it. But I mean, I think they asked the guy that mows their lawn, can I mow it today? Like, I don't think it's. Can I push that? Yeah. He's like, do you mind if I do a little bit of it? And the guy's like, sure. And like, you know, I'm, I think the guy that mows it is there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, I mean, yeah, I don't think, I don't think they're doing, I mean, it'd be very interesting. I mean, look, I've been around.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Computers. I knew I'm like, I did a show for, like you'd meet, cause we'd do these shows and these shows are crazy. So you'd be around Paul like, and I mean, Paul's was like just like a, like a world, I did this crazy cruise where I did a show, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which I think here, I was never know if I'm, you were, it was like the thing that I had to like sign a thing and you couldn't talk about it that I did it. But Quincy Jones was on it and then he talked about it in a Rolling Stone interview. So it's out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, so I did this cruise where I, uh, I got hired just to be a comedian on this cruise. And Paul Allen has put together, he wanted to do a, uh, this kind of cruise that where it's like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Basically people that are super famous and a lot of them wealthy that can't take normal vacations and he, and he, and he got, it was like a group of very awesome people that got together and it was people that were, you know, tech people and there were celebrities on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I was hired just to be honest. So it was in, uh, we flew to Vietnam. My wife went and we got on a cruise ship that he rented out. So it was like 200 people on this cruise ship.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, he just rented, and they told us he wanted to invest like the wifi. I watched, you know, in North Carolina and Villanova, played Villanova won the championship. I watched that in the South China Sea.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And we, they had it on wifi and their wifi was not great. So he just invested in the company and then upgraded their wifi.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like it was like, it's so, it's like, it's like stuff like that. Like, you know what I mean? Where like their brain doesn't think like, I wish the wifi was better and like they try to do something. He's like, I'll make it better and I'll just get into your company. And, uh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Paul was an, I mean, was an amazing dude. Like, you know, the, the little bit that I was around him and knew him was very nice, was into like love, like would talk to me about comedy, would like


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Talkin' with jokes, he loved musicians, like he played too, he's like, you probably did not as much, not as talented as you are, cause you did everything. And then, uh, so, but we would meet all these crazy, you know, just crazy people dude, like that was, and I remember doing, I did this show, and it was like a crazy show to do cause I,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was so nervous with like, cause we're in the South State and everybody in that I'm performing for is just...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Famous or wealthy, like it's just, you know, in your little worried that you're like, I'm going to be, how are you going to be relatable to these people? But it worked out and it was great and like, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I'm at, I mean, Joe Walsh from the Eagles is on it. Uh, super fun dude. Very funny. He's very, and he loves comedy. Uh, I mean, there's a, I don't know if I'd be naming it. Like, there's a ton of people that are so funny.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It wasn't Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise. No, they were not on it. Uh, I wish they were. Uh, but it was an amazing, Quincy Jones is like, he's on it. Like talk to him a little bit. I mean, he's like, you know, super old, but like you're like doing that. And then we ended up staying the whole time on the cruise. They asked me to do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Another set. Cause I was supposed, we were supposed to fly off, but it like, when the show went good and Paul was like, Oh, why don't you and your wife stay? Cause it was like a nine day thing. And then, so now we're staying now. It's now it's funny. You're kind of talking to everybody. It's like normal. Uh, and you're doing all this stuff. Quentin Tarantino was on it. Uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He was very fun. He, after I did my second set.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I saw him right when I got off and, uh, he just went to me and he goes, Oh, how'd it go? And I was like, Oh, it was good. And he was like, I'm just kidding, man. I watched it. It was great. Like it was like, he was like very fun like that. Uh, but they, um, it was like this amazing, uh, group of people, but it's a group of people that don't like, no, I heard Paul talk about someone. He told someone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was like a French director, like some that's huge. And he's telling him like, he goes, oh, I, uh, as soon as he goes, my NFL team, I have the Seattle Seahawks. I own an NFL. He's like explaining it to him. And it was so funny just to hear it. Like I've like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, like the draft was about to happen. I'm like trying to ask him questions about the draft. Like what are they going to do? And, uh, and he's like explaining to someone like, Oh, well, I have a team, an NFL team. And so we play football and he's like explaining the guys like, Oh, okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, how's that? Like, and he's just like, and the guy's like, truly interested in like, it would be like, my daughter plays softball.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I are plays baseball and I, uh, I run the team. I sponsored it. It would be something like that, but he's talking about the Seahawks and you're just sitting there watching them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, just like, be like, ah, okay. Like, it was, uh, I don't know. I don't know what this story might be. Yeah, anyone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was an amazing, but being around those guys, like that, he's in a different world, man. Like he's not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Obviously, he's a, he's a billionaire. He's, I mean, he's in another, it's just, I don't know, money is just not, the meaning of money is not the same to them. You know, but I think it means something to them. They do want.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The money, but their money comes in, like, you gotta think, like, if you get a check for, if you make a thousand dollars a week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean they make, you know, Patrick Mahomes, they broke down his thing, he's gonna make like a million dollars in a week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or something like that for his new contract. Like that's like, so a check comes in for one million dollars every week. There's a point they get used to seeing that money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You get used to seeing a million dollars a week, so you're not even like, wow, I can't believe this is...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Another million, you know, you're like, whatever. You pray, you could have a one that you haven't, you forgot to cash. Like you could have one. Can you imagine having a million dollar check and you're like, did we put that in? And then if you lose it, you're like, I don't know. I might've lost a couple million here. And like, if you have, you know, we're talking about Jeff Bezos. I mean, he's got, what's his net worth? Like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, first ring I ever bought my wife was at Tiffany and company. It was a $200. I went in and bought the cheapest ring they had. Did you ask for the cheapest ring? And I was, I mean, I gave the vibe off of this guy. They, they didn't walk me over to some other counters. I was waiting tables in Chicago when I started comedy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, my wife's not into like super materialistic. She doesn't really care about stuff, but I just heard her, like it was, I knew it was a nice thing and I think I've heard her say something and I bought it green at Tiffany company. So I, I'm part of that 110 billion.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] From you in 2003, I believe, maybe four. I don't know if you guys can look that up. Uh, but I'm excited for your success. You know, and he's. You're welcome. Yeah, you're welcome. And he's like, Oh man, I really, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That means a lot. You know, that's how we get where we get is by the $200 at a time. Like he's, and then his security tasers me and I go down.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean like, so a billion dollars is, you know, like for you to live a life of, that you can do whatever you want.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know what you need, like, you know. He's got a lot of instruments, so. Yea, you got a lot of money flying out the door. Like if you got 10 million dollars, if someone gave you 10 million dollars, is that enough, like, if you're 30 years old.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is 10 million enough to be like, you're good. You don't have to work. Cause what people don't realize too is like, you're what, you're the way you live.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like the way you, you go buy a nicer house. You live in a different neighborhood. You have a different car. Like so, like people think, like if you're like some guys in an apartment by himself, he's like, dude, I can live off 10 million easy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then, you're like, well, you're not gonna stay in the, yea, if you stayed in that apartment, you could, like, but if you, I mean, you could live off more than two men, not the, but you know, but if you go buy a million dollar home,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If someone gives you 10 million dollars, you're probably buying a 2 million dollar home. Well now you're down to 8 million. And then...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're, you know, and then milk is probably going to go crazy. Gas is, you're only, you're only going to that one expensive gas place because you can afford it. And you're just, and out of reason you go, I go to the one that's $5 and everybody's like, why would you not do the $3 one? And it's like, cause I have $10 million.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm just saying with my head, if you would have given me a second, I would never have said 120 yards. I was thinking you were going to be like, a little more than this table.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 68 miles. 68 miles? 68 miles long. So a little over a thousand yards.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The first one, obviously. And you can't, he's like, no, I control money. And so...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We just, all our dollar bills are out of circuit. Like everybody, you just see everything you have to buy in dollar bills. You're like, why are we having to pay in dollar bills now? Because.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's, but that's insane. They do the charity, they're asking, people ask for charity of these.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's infuriating. Everywhere you go. They need charity. I, you know what? I don't give to anything. No.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We, I give stuff, we give stuff privately. You just give your things that you give and you, and you make sure that you give, uh, what you, I mean, you try to do the right thing. And then, but like when you go to like any regular store and they're like, do you want to give this money? Hey, some of them, you're like, I don't, like, who are you giving this to? Is it going to go somewhere?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, I've always thought with charity, there's a weird, I have a weird thing with charity, like cancer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We got, like, I mean, there's a head start. If you get toe cancer, it's not even a problem anymore. Like, there should be something. How much money is raised each year for cancer research?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Give it to one, look, I don't know how science works, but I imagine let's write a check to one guy that's, that's the best guy and be like, here's all the money, go solve the candidates. Alright, there it is right there, look.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We might have, my mom had kidney cancer and she's alright. She just, uh, caught it very early. A lot of money went to it. She actually got a check for 20 million dollars, so I didn't know where that came from. Uh, but now I see. Uh, I'm just, look.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do I believe in cancer? No. I just, it never made sense to me to think like we donate all this. Does that make sense? We donate all this money to something and you're like, I feel like we're nowhere with cancer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's still just brutal on everybody. And like you would think one of the cancers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Should be like, we got it. We figured it out. Like, it's, you know, I mean, how many people are working on this cancer? Like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're doing like COVID vaccines, they're like getting somewhere, cause I mean, they put a, like, all the money, like, everybody wants this COVID vaccine, so they're at least, like, you're seeing like, alright, we're almost, like, at least some kind of a vaccine. And so with cancer, you're like, we've been raising money for cancer for 50 years.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So long as Tom Cruise has been, it's been Tom Cruise's first movie. He's been just giving money to cancer. I mean, I just feel like we should be, maybe we are, I mean, you know. I think we are.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wow. There you go. Nice little statement for a hundred trillion dollars. Just to be like, we're, we're getting there. Maybe we are getting there. What do I know, man? But I just, I'm just saying.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Can you figure a way to have people travel with it? I could do it. In their pocket? In their pocket. For one billion dollars? Yea. You think you could do it? Probably. Yea. Would you make the instrument smaller or pants bigger? You have a billion dollars so you could go two different ways.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Can't just solve. Here's, uh, someone that we looked at that was interesting. El, uh, our, uh, Pablo Escobar. Yep. Was on the Forbes list. Which if you've watched Narcos, I'm an enormous Narcos fan. Narcos is unbelievable on Netflix. Uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's just so crazy to me. I think it's, it's, it feels like, you know, uh, you know, it always like stuck with me. I remember a long time ago, I was in near.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The Mexican border near Juarez. I was in, I think it's Arizona or New Mexico, but whatever backs up to it. And I was, we were close to Juarez, but like you could go there and this is like, and you know, I was probably 20 years old. And, uh, I remember seeing the news in my hotel room and they said, no one go to Juarez. It's a lawless place right now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I remember just seeing that on the news and I was like, that's crazy dude. Like I've never heard like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it was like, that was 20 years ago. And it was just always like, I dunno, I always think about that. But then you start now seeing these cartels and like the way it is down there, it's, it's unbelievable. I mean, there was a guy that did narcos that was like a scout, like a location scout guy was killed by the cartel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like how crazy is that? For, he makes, it's a Netflix show. It's not like they were doing some weird documentary. It's a Netflix show and that guy was killed by the guard. Like it's like, you just can't go do anything there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, but Escobar, so what do ya, he was...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Dude, how imagine that divorce? Is that, is that bothering? You get a divorce and she gets, and you're worth 200 billion dollars, so she gets...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're, you're not getting half of the billion. Like does it not feel, but she made a good point to be like, look, if you get, if you have 50 grand and you get a divorce, they get 25 grand. And I'm a, if they've been there from the, like, if they've been there from the get go, like I get it. Like my wife's been with me before I ever started a company.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, so she deserves half of whatever I have, which is close to $4 billion. And then, but she, you know, like I, I, I'm not against, but there's a point if a guy's got $120 billion.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Don't they just go, well that's kind of ridiculous for you to get 60 billion, like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, 1 billion, or 500 million, or 1 billion. Should put a cap on it somewhere. They should go...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you're just, there should be a cap in the divorce court to go, if you have more money than the state you're getting divorced in, you don't, the wife gets $1 billion. She doesn't get.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm not on board with either. You know, I think Pablo took the harder route. That's for sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They, uh, I, I did think I once, when I went, I went to the Astro, the World Series Astros game when I was in town and I bought a ticket and I sat down and I think I sat next down to a cartel member, but that's a complete judgment because he bought, it was him and his own family and I just pictured, but that's...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's completely, probably not true. I wish, I hope it's true. Yeah. You know? But they look, it was like, his, his, his, his grandfather, and it's like, it just looked like they could've been a family, you know? They're big Astro fans.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I didn't say they were sneaking in the US, that's you. So I said they legally came in.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When we did suffer the troops, we would stay in Saddam's palace. And so, it was unbelievable.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so you go around, the interesting thing about Saddam's palace is he, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He would make it, everything was painted gold. So it wasn't like real gold. So when you would see it, it was all painted gold because he, he didn't want to, he had palaces everywhere. And so that way when people would see it, it just looks like it's golden. People would be like, man, he's our leader. He's look how rich he is. And the people were right outside the gate.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Didn't have water. I mean, it's the difference. So when the soldiers took over, uh, his palace...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They, uh, I mean I went to his, his son's palaces were on that property too, like we saw where they, the bomb that came through his palaces, his son's palaces.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But they, he had lions and tigers and like all this stuff. So the, like our, our troops like go in and they have to like fight people and then also lions. Like, cause they would just be there and they would have to like, can you imagine like you're just in this, in Iraq and you're like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He just had them at his house, like he had a safari. Yeah. And so they had to go and do that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, was he a billionaire? He probably, yeah, some of those guys have crazy, like I thought that would be the richest guys. The guys like this old money, like some of them, they have like stupid money. That's what they are. The ones that like end up like paying for Beyonce to come see to them for 1 million. And that's like nothing like they don't, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, good night. They're like, Jeff Bezos is like, ugh, like he would just, if he's sitting at his table, he's like, ah, he goes, Hey guys, Saddam's coming over. Uh, and Saddam walks in with a bottle of wine and you're like, he's like, I got this for you again. They're like, uh, like that's up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So how's it going, Saddam? I mean, you getting by, buddy? Uh, and he's like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I did use, we did see a story where, uh, you said, it said, once you make 75 grand, you'd know more happier.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They, they just, I, I wanna, you know, you never see a study that's like done by Volunteer State Community College and you're like, oh, alright, I'll hear what that guy has to say. Like they just, it's always one of these fancy schools.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But did you graduate from there? One day I'll make $75,000. Uh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. That's crazy. Your buddy had a class with him. Like he, did he say, you know, did he have any signs? Oh yeah. Was it? Yeah. Was she, did she like, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, he goes, uh, stupid. He goes, one day, one day I'll show him. And they're like, what's that? Paul? He goes, nothing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I brought, got brought on stage one time. Uh, it was like a weird story. Then they introduced me. They gave a car to a vet that had no legs and they gave him, they gave him a car. The whole audience is crying. He had no idea. His name was, his name was Nate.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I swear to you, they give them a car, everybody's crying, can't believe it. And they go, all right, everybody, please welcome Nate Bargetzi. And then I come out and like, and I'm like, guys, my wife's so crazy. I'm like, that's my complaints is like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, you ever guys take your kids to Disney World when they're two? This guy doesn't have legs. He's not even off the stage yet with no legs. And like, that's, it was just, I just bombed for five minutes. No, he is. Was it a special?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, 90, when I graduated high school, 97, so 98. Oh, you just missed him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. Yeaah. Anyway. So, you were saying 75 grand doesn't make you happier. I don't know if I'll believe that. Anyway. I mean, clearly. And the lottery!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Doesn't, yea, a lot of people think it like, well let's cut to...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause we're going to be running out of time. We want the, I would, some of these game shows that I did find interesting was like the who wants to be a millionaire was another one that were people frauded. And, uh, we're guy one by having his buddy audience cough. Have you seen it? Let's, uh, just play the cough. All right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's like, that's what they should have picked on. He's like, I'm going to do just a bunch of different stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, that's fair. That's what they tend to do. Alright, that makes sense. My grandmother had hay fever. When were you born, sir? Uh, the 1900s? Is hay fever still, did they solve hay fever? Probably have that solved.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They probably gave 75 grand to hay fever and they knocked that out. Like that's all it cost. Uh, I don't know what hay fever is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do the other one too. So one of the coolest ones, I remember watching this one. This thing was, I remember this thing was unbelievable. Uh, this guy wins.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he's used, he's not used the lifeline at all. And then he finally uses one lifeline on the last question.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, I don't think, he got it wrong, that's def- no, he, he nailed it. Uh, he's, uh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, it's unbelievable. It's like, I remember watching it, like, and this was when, I mean, that show was enormous. Yeah. And, uh, it was just so, it was like such a good, yeah, the confidence of that is crazy, but like such a cool thing to be like, you know, I mean, he's just that positive that he did it. Uh, all right. For us to wrap up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What game show do you think you would be the best at? I think, who wants to be a millionaire?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what my daughter calls my daughter and niece, all the kids now call Brian Bob ripple pants.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They made that name up, which is a great name. I don't know where it came from, but Bob Ripple Pants. And then they call, that was very funny.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's no way he wants to be a millionaire. Why, what is it then? What's my answer? I just don't think it's, you're gonna know all the answers, like, that's like Jeopardy, dude. Like, you know... But the difference in Jeopardy, I wouldn't be fascinated.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I would probably be, you know, deal or no deal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Where you're just guessing like, like strategically trying to guess like kind of stuff. It's going to be something like that. That's going to be my best chance. I mean, there's a lot of math involved in that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, I don't know. I don't know if that's even true. Yeaah. I think you'd go on Family Feud and get in a feud with your wife while up there. Like, why did you? Are you kidding me right now? Like, that's your answer?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, deal or no deal. It'd be something like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kids Jeopardy, I was pretty good at when they let kids go on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're real young kids? Not the college kids? No, no. It's when they let like, when it's like eight year olds, I'm like, I'm like decent eight.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so I'm like, I do pretty good. I love it. Like I'm like, I always get that. So I would do good at eight year old Jeopardy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Are, are, I'm saying, no, I'm not going, I don't think y'all are smart enough to do what they are saying. I think y'all would get crushed. Are you smarter than a fifth grader? I think I would have a fighting chance on mine. I think you get crushed on who wants to be a millionaire is at least a little bit of a guess, but, uh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, it could be Ryan Malone, my buddy Ryan that I grew up with. He's super, super smart. Felix, my neighbor, just knows a ton of stuff and is an unbelievably smart guy. Probably Felix actually. Cause he's, Ryan knows a lot of stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Felix is, his, his business is I think knowing, he knows a lot of things, a lot of different things and, uh, very good at games.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, you know, wouldn't be anybody here, tell you that. Uh, I'd call the guy from the Price is Right gang that we talked about at the beginning. He actually could be a good guy to call.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He just knows. Yeah, but he knows everything. I would, if I was on it, I would get a hold of him and say, Hey, I'm about to go on this game. Can you start putting your focus into this game?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then I would like, you know, and be like, cause that kind of energy, this guy figured out price is right. I think you can shove that guy in any direction of any game and he could go all in and he'd be all in and do it. He's committed. He's committed. All right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, all right. Well, we did it. We did it. Uh, so, uh, yeah, I don't know. We'll figure a way to end these better, but you know, that was it. There's a new format. That one, you know, that's pretty good. We kind of stick on one topic and I like it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what we're doing now. Uh, maybe it's not good, but, uh, you know what, guys?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] These are not all gonna be good. Uh, alright, that's it for us. Thank you guys for listening to Nightland. Subscribe, do all that stuff. We appreciate it. Uh, leave comments, ask questions. If you have to, we're, we're trying to get some of those. You can.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Follow us on, uh, Bates runs all the social media on there. So make sure if you have any questions you want to ask, you can send to him on there. And, uh, yeah, that's it. We'll see you next time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'd say it's more likely you got it from Austin Powers. I think we all agree that. Yeah, Louis Armstrong.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't think so. You're talking about the movie with Channing Tatum. He saves the world.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what I'm saying. What is the has fallen movie?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Olympus has fallen. So not a planet at all. It sounds like a moon, maybe of Jupiter. Maybe that's where I got confused.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm a fan, but not to y'all's level. I need to get there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was going to say, dude, if you want to start, they were on NBC too. You want to start talking West?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For TV broadcasts, there's probably somebody there transcribing it, but for like YouTube, closed captioning, it's all automatic, obviously.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Keys, they, each key has multiple letters on it and then they, so they can type super, they just use like each hand. They're not even using fingers. It's amazing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe. I did mock trial in high school and I remember we did, there's one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Trial we were doing where the stenographer like told us that we were arguing back and forth and she was like, I can't keep up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I had never seen a stenographer break character like that. Like yea, y'all gotta slow down.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Would you have done mock trial? I think you would have been good at it. Maybe. Yeah. Yeah. I've been a witness. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's how it's been for me. It's been like no more than me being overweight.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I think a few times it was somebody lost their fantasy football and they had to come to a spot. And it's like this thing that you've, I devoted my life to and I'm like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is like, this is my passion and then it's somebody's punishment. You know, show up and do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But if the crowd's terrible, if they're annoying, then we'll put that guy up early.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When I did Tampa with you, the Olivia story had just happened, I think that morning.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nate brings that out of people, his comedy. We get it, you riled up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I slept for 24 hours once in college. I've never done that since.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was like fi, it was like finals week and I was pulling all-nighters and remember I went to bed at like 10 and I woke up at 10 30 and I didn't feel, I felt awful. And I went downstairs and I was like, everyone's like, where have you been? I just slept 24 and a half hours, dude.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and it's always, it's always something, at least the ones I get, it's always something they think is super original.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it's just not, but it's not their fault. They don't spend all day thinking about jokes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think a lot of people just don't know how to give a compliment, and it's not...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Their fault at all. It's like if I saw a Tarantino movie and then I saw Tarantino on the way out, like, I don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know how I would intelligently give him a compliment.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] On the movie, you know, I'd probably sound dumb if I were like, man, the plot was great plot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, the mayor of Nashville came to some shows.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'll have you know, former mayor of Nashville, Megan Barry is a big fan of mine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I bombed a couple days ago. Uhm, I did too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I've done plenty of shows that are just train wrecks.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But for me, it's like when the stakes feel really high and you bomb, that's when it really hurts. I always think of, I was like five months into comedy, I got offered to open.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For James Gregory at a theater in Gallatin. Two shows, first shows at 4pm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's all part. It felt like a huge, I couldn't believe that I was getting to do this. Yeah. And it's like a four or 500 person theater sold out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I meet James, he's very nice. He says, you can do 15 minutes. Do at least 15. Don't do 20, but do at least 15. And here's the only thing I need you to do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is take the mic stand with you off the stage, because he uses a lapel mic. So I was like, alright, man.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Exactly. Yeah. Perfectly reasonable. Reasonable question. So I walk out there at first show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I said, how's everybody doing? And it was nothing. I mean, I got, they weren't doing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was a 4 o'clock show, very old crowd, and I was 24.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, dude, I bombed so bad. I can still feel the way it felt. I got literally nothing. And I did all my, I did my closer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause I gotta do at least 15, right? And I just stumbled through the next eight minutes and then I forgot to take the mic stand off the stage. So he had to call me back out on stage to get the mic stand. And it was just so, I remember thinking they're going to fire me for the next show. Like why would they even?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I go back to the green room and it's just this big room and I'm sitting there by myself and my girlfriend, who's now my fiance, was in the crowd.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And she had sent me a text during my set and it just said, wow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I just read that and I sat back there. And then you gotta sit there for an hour while he's on stage, right? Just stew in it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that was my worst one. Cause it felt, it felt like the biggest thing in the world to me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You did that, and then the very next thing was the polls. You're like, who are these sources? So I think...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Someone said everything you ran it about. I then said, well, I do that. Yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, you alienated like 99% of the people last week by saying, who's these people posting with three viewers on Facebook? Well, that's all of us.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I did a show last night, Instagram live show, and you could see how many people were watching and it ranged from eight to 10 the entire time. When we were done, it got down to five.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Every time you do a show, well maybe not you, but Aaron, when, and they're like, there's nobody there, and they're like, I don't know what happened, last week it was packed. Every time. Every time. Almost every time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sometimes I used to think you were a genius, sometimes I think you're an idiot. I don't think that anymore. What do you think? Just idiot?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You worked at Mega, what is it? Mega Video in Murfreesboro.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A lot, uh, and we were the only place that, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Murphy's Pearl Council members and stuff would come in there. Wow, the big wigs of the town would come in. Ah, so you would see them come in.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Video stores are like the one thing now that small towns have that big cities don't. Yea.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I know they're, yeah. But I think there's some small towns now that still have video stores.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think they're agreeing with Nate about people who are trying to get famous in social media and have too- It's oversaturated.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nothing, I got a second cousin that's been to jail time or two for some minor offenses, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I see it, I've seen it a couple of times on a website. He's never been to prison. It's just like, you know. But do you see him often?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, before DNA, they were like, uh, Lieutenant, there's a pool of the suspect's blood here on the floor. And you're like, ugh, gross. Get that cleaned up so we can get on this case.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, uh, there's always people who speculate that, you know, it wasn't him. I think he denied it to the end, but there was some strong evidence because this is what's so crazy back then.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He sent, uh, ransom letters to them. And I don't know if they just didn't get the police involved or not. This is just what I looked up on here. But, uh, another guy got involved and wrote an editorial in the paper, said you should give the baby up. And he's like, well, you bring me the money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So a third party got involved and this guy brought him ransom money to a cemetery and gave it to him. Can you imagine doing that now? Like it just wouldn't work.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then later they found some of the ransom money on him. There was a lot of evidence against the guy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He was the first American to fly solo across the Atlantic. I think he's one of the most famous people in the world at that time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, he lived in this place for years, so it's either. Does he have a mole?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is it that you file that you don't think they did it? Or you question?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, in 1971, this guy, uh, told the flight attendant, he was on a flight in the Pacific Northwest, he told the flight attendant he had a bomb, he lifted the briefcase, shoulder, he had what appeared to be a bomb, and


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We know the funny thing is that I read it, he handed her a note and she just assumed it was a guy hitting on her and she just put it in her purse.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then he was like, ma'am, uh, you might want to read that note. And then she read it and it was like, I have a bomb.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, he uh, showed her the bomb, and they land the plane. He forces them to land the plane somewhere. They announce to the passengers that there was like a maintenance issue or something, and they get him his ransom money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He said he lowered his, his shade, he didn't say this, but they said he lowered his shade to keep from a sniper, like taking them out while they're in the tarmac. And then, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But they get him his ransom money, the flight takes back off, and uh, he has a parachute.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The pilot just said that they could tell from the air pressure in the back, like, you know, what's going on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they could tell that a door was opened and then they finally feel comfortable enough, like, let's go look and he's gone and they never found his body. They've found a few of the bills scattered, I think over the years, but no one still knows who he is. It was a fake name. They don't even know the identity of the guy. Um, so it's a kind of a crazy story.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, there's like a few suspects that they think maybe, but most of them are dead now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Super. How much money was it? I felt like it was like 200,000.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, he extorted $200,000 equivalent to $1,260,000.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Think about how lax though the airport must have been then if you had a fake ID and a bomb on you and you get away with it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Crazy. Yeah. Back then when you got off the plane, if they were, they could be waiting for you right there. You get off.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Are you concerned at all that there's going to be a crime and you've got on your computer Googling how to hire an assassin?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Simulating something and he would leave, go to a killing and come back on Christmas day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not the one from 1984. I mean, there's a lot of them on here, but it's, maybe it's been passed. Well, maybe so. I just, I can't find one from 1984. It's just a bunch of different. I was going to say the Brinks job though. I think like the town movies like that are based on the Brinks job.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, there's the Brinks job, right? So the Brinks job, so that's it. Oh no, that's a different one. That's a different one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] North Ireland, so. I mean. Is there an American one on here? Lebanon?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But how crazy, you scrub down the townhouse and then they're like, hey, did you get in the dishwasher? No man, I ran the dishwasher. That will take care of the fingerprints.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, you're making some good points. What would be your mastermind though? Like, what would you do?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My father-in-law is 81 years old and his job is he works security at the Frist.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The museum downtown where they have 30 million dollar artifacts there. Yeah. And he's security, but what really is is like that. He's the guy that just kind of can I help you, sir?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The other one is where they stole an artifact or replaced it with a replica and no one knew it. That's the first one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe that, yeaah. Think about like the guy who stole the Mona Lisa and he kept it in his apartment for like two years and then finally tried to sell it and immediately got caught.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do you feel like, so there'll be no fans there, right? Um, yeah, they're not going to have fans. They haven't exactly stated yet where they're going to allow like, you know, family, family, maybe 10 people per group or something like that, but it's certainly going to be different. I would imagine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] After trying to get it out of the sand on your, what, fifth shot now, I looked at you and was like, what are you doing? What are you doing? What is this?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean with how much you've been playing, I'd say that there's nowhere else to go. It was, it had to get better.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've shot 60 a few times, never shot 59, uh, shot 60 actually at Vanderbilt Legends, uh, on the south course, shot 60 at my home course in Owensboro, Kentucky, that's where I'm from.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, for sure, but I would likely have played the PGA tour this summer with some sponsors invites. And so, um, but yeah, I mean, it's all, all good. All that happens, you know, for a reason. So we'll just kind of waiting it out. I'm going to play the US Open the Masters this fall and then, uh, you know, take some, hopefully get some exemptions after that and either next summer or.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, if plans change and I leave after this first semester, I'm not sure yet.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It varies. Yeaah, it varies. So, you know, I don't know when I'll tee off. But yeaah, I mean, I'll be nervous, but...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, I've luckily played in a PGA Tour event. I played in one, uhm, last year. And so, I didn't feel more nervous there than any other event. I'm always, you know, kind of anxious on the first tee shot. But once, once I can get it off the tee, we're just kind of competing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, he would. Yes. You said that it would be around forever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I don't know. I, I like crowds. I want, you know, in the, you know, whatever, probably 10 events that have actually had big crowds. Like I think it's fun. I think it's, you know. Yeah, crowds are great. It's great. You know, you kind of feel off the energy. So I, I'm kind of conflicted on the subject and I think it could go both ways.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It works out. It works out. Yeah, you had been 20... 19 and a half.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like for me, going back to like what Aaron said, like I grew up, because I think I liked Seinfeld so much, was I grew up when my dad loved Seinfeld and so every single night at 5 o'clock TBS showed 5, you know, 5 to 5.30, 5.30 to 6, 2 episodes of Seinfeld every night. And so I mean I did that for Aaron.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 14, I was pretty aware that it was not on TV.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've, I've never watched TV on my computer. I didn't have a computer, like I had a computer in my house, like a family computer, you know, with desktop and everything, but like I didn't have like a laptop until I went to college and so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would say I pretty much always watch it on TV. Now it may be like a smart TV where you're connected to wifi, you watch Netflix or Hulu or whatever, but most of the stuff I'm watching, if it's not Seinfeld, I'm watching sports.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I have YouTube TV right now, so I get the channels, the live channels.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's gotta be pretty weird though that it was a radio, like if I'm thinking of this correctly, it would be a radio show that they now are putting on TV.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well my, my parents like two nights ago were like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Asked me like, what am I paying for YouTube TV? And I told them they're like, they're paying.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like four times that for cable. And so they're like, well, we're going to try YouTube TV. And so I gave them my account information. They signed in and, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My mom immediately calls me and is like, why can't you switch between channels? And I was like, what do you mean? You just like go back and like scroll down. She's like, so I have to do that every time I want to switch channel. I was like, yeah, it's pretty simple though. You know, it's not very hard. It's how you get into it though. I think for you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like TV also went to like, I don't know, maybe eight years ago, whatever around that time, like it went to, you want a million channels, like, oh, you can upgrade all these packages. And now it's coming back to where like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Honestly, they were watching it. You know, we're talking about kids now watching on phones, they were already watching on phones. They were already watching on phones.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My dad said that when he was a kid and they were watching, you know, like Kentucky basketball games, they would turn the sound off on the TV and turn it on on the radio with the screen on because he said it was a better


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like it was much better on the radio than it was on the TV, but you could watch it and listen at the same time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, those are the best. Yeah. Those new, uh, sports center commercials, it was like, they're acting like they're back in time. Like it's, it's going, it's running like recently and they're like farmer, they're farmer's insurance. Yeah. Uh. Oh yeah. Yeah. But yeah, yeah. Those are good right now. Yep.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I remember VHSs, but I definitely remember going to Blockbuster. I did that my entire childhood.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I think they might still have it, honestly.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They'll likely adjust to whatever's gonna happen. They're not just gonna like cease to exist, I would imagine. Or else they don't have a good time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The only thing I can think of for, like in terms of when I was younger would have to be American Idol.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I watched it like my family and I, my sisters and my parents, but not we, we all watch it like together, whatever night it came on. That was when I was young or not. Forget how big that show was. I mean, that was the biggest.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I actually didn't watch Breaking Bad until like sophomore year of college, two years ago.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Last year I had caught up all the way to on Blacklist. I love Blacklist and so I watched that on TV for like probably 6 weeks straight. And then also uh, presented it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In 2005 though, when he had that chip in over the back of the green on 16, he was Chris DiMarco. But my earliest sports memory, I think, was the Red Sox coming back from 3-0 against the Yankees in 2004.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How old were you? I was 7, 8, 7. No, I would have been 8. Okay. Uhm. The bloody sock? Yeah, that was, yeah. But uhm. I remember that. Like it just happened. Yeah. But that was like part of the reason I became like a Red Sox fan, cause like, what did you say Brian?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's weird is I don't remember that at all. Like I feel like I should. 2001, nah. 2001, so you shouldn't. But there's a lot, there's some people, maybe they just claim they know it, but like I've heard people my age be like, yeah, I kinda remember that. I don't remember it at all.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Seinfeld? Yeah, I mean, it might be Seinfeld. It could be, you know, like if I'm really dating back, it could be like a Disney channel maybe or a Nickelodeon type thing. Yeah. But, uh, probably Seinfeld.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay. I love Breaking Bad. Uhm, but I also love, uh, uh, Blacklist. I really like Blacklist. Yeah. My dad likes Blacklist. It's kept me coming back. Cause I think, uh, like the character Raymond Reddington is flawless. He's phenomenal. That's James Spader, right? Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think, I think it's worth watching, I mean, it can be a little, like there's just so much that goes on, like later in the seasons, like you, you start, there's a lot of like cliffhangers at the end of episodes. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're still feeding off that walking dead stuff. Are there spinoffs or is there- Yea, it's like, now it's called like, the fear of the walking dead or something like that. It's nuts, it's still going on. I never- I watched-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't care about Game of Thrones. I watched the first four episodes and it was really slow and I lost interest.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But one of the shows like you're saying that nobody watches that I really like is called Peaky Blinders. It's on Netflix. It is pretty dark, a lot of killing. Uhm, but I love it. I think it's British, right? Yeah, yeah. It's a guy, what's the main actor? Benedict?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is that him? Is that him? Is that him? Is that him? Is that him? Is that him? Is that him? Is that him? Is that him?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, I didn't prepare very well for this one. Uh, but business school for sure was one of mine. I know we're all saying that, but I did write it down, so it's true. And then I did Survivorman when he goes out into the wild.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he gets everyone in the conference room and just makes it a... When he pushes... Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I love the, on the job one, like I love the part where Michael doesn't understand he's interviewing for Jan's job. And so like when he tells him, he's like, let's just run away together. You can pay off all my debts. We can just get out of here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wouldn't say they're tough to watch. I would just say they're not as good as the later seasons, but just like we were talking, like I went back and watched like part of the first and second season. And like you said, how their shot is like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If we were, they were at this table, like right now, if Jerry was talking, it would be on him and then it would be on, like it wouldn't be a sh- like back here where you could see everybody talking like it does in the later episodes. It's very individualized.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, Morty, I mean, they're not on there that often, like a couple of times. You're on there a lot though. I mean, you're going to


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'll go quick. I said, uh, The Little Kicks is one of the best ones in my opinion because that's also Jerry bootlegging the movie.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and then I got the puffy shirt and, uh, the slicer. Yeah. And so, uh, the puffy shirt, I just love that one because that's when George is moving back in to with his parents and he's complaining to Jerry and like their


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Going back and forth on whose parents are worse, and uh, George is like, my father wears sneakers in the pool. And then, you know, he's like, my mother's never smirked, never Teehee, not a laugh. And he's like, a giggle? Maybe.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, and then the slicer's great cause, you know, they, Kramer's slicing all those meats and like, he's like, I haven't had a good sandwich in 13 years and like, you know, throws around Jerry's sandwiches like me either.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he goes, well, I could go either way on you, George, but we need somebody. So, you know, whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Chicken Roaster. Yeah. The Marlboro is underrated. I watched it last night because I wanted to kind of see about it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And in the beginning when she's like, he was an Andrea Doria survivor and he goes, oh, it's quite some fire. Shipwreck. I remember.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think the money is really good too because I think it contains maybe the best scene in Seinfeld. Uh, or no, maybe not the best, but it has one of the better lines in Seinfeld when George is like


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Him and Jared debating whose parents have more money and, uh, he's like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, they, he goes to his parents house and starts asking about like basically his family.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, he's like, how old was aunt baby when she died? Can you tell me a little bit about aunt baby? And Frank just looks at the ceiling and goes, she's deceased. They keep talking. It's like, how old would aunt baby been today, Frank?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's up everybody. This is Nate Barghetti. Welcome to the Nate-Lan, uh, podcast. Uh, I'm sitting here with Aaron Weber. Brian Bates is, uh, usual, still trying to get rid of them. I would like to, if it's every week, if I was trying to get, I've been doing auditions of other.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, today, uh, we are brought to you by DraftKings. Uh, thank you DraftKings for sponsoring this episode. Uh, nothing adds to the excitement of watching the game, quite like having a shot at millions of dollars in prizes. Download the DraftKings app now and use code NATELAND.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For a limited time, new users can get a free shot at millions of dollars in prizes this week. Don't miss out on the week two action, NFL, all of it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Enter code NATELAND to get a free shot at millions of dollars in prizes with your first deposit. That's code NATELAND.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thank you DraftKings. Uh, alright, uh, I mean, speaking of sports, we had big Titans played last night. Crazy game. I feel like we should have won more. More. I'm really excited about the Titans team. If I know people, some people who listen to this don't care about sports, but it is very,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Titans are, man, we got a team. We got a fun team. Just a lot of receivers running back. I mean, everything's pretty fun. Big names. It feels good. Uh, so I'm excited about that. I also did, uh, Jason Day, uh, a golfer. He does the, they do the brighter day foundation.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, he does this like celebrity golf tournament and I, I went and did that this weekend, uh, which was a lot of fun. I've done it the year before. I probably continue to do it. It's a played an amazing course and we've got to hang with his, uh, family and people listening to the podcast on there. Rika, his buddy Rika and his wife.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, we're big fans of the podcast. Listen to it, uh, all the time. Listen to every episode. Uh, yeah, very nice. So, uh, it was, they said we have, I was mean to you. That's because you feel like you're mean. And as usual, my.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, my comeback to that is they say I can't read.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I don't feel bad. Yeah, but that's different. How's that? What would be worse? Me being a little mean to you or other human beings think a 41 year old. They're pointing out facts and you're just choosing to be mean to me. What's the difference? That is different. That is they're telling the truth. They're speaking the truth.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, so yeah, we did that. I met Bubba Watson, another golfer, was super cool.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He was, uh, I gotta talk to him. I was very excited to meet him. I have yet to meet him and, uh, I thought he was very nice.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yep, Bubba and Jason do. I mean, it's Jason Day's event. He always brings one PGA guy that plays. I mean, it's a sli- I get paired up at a group of guys from Texas that were, uh, very nice. I've always been very lucky.