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[Assistant] Uhm, the king granted the colony and they originally called it Providence Plantations because plantation means colony in England.


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[Assistant] So for first 20 years, it was called Providence Plantations instead of Rhode Island.


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[Assistant] And then once they became a state after the Revolutionary War, it was called the State of Rhode Island and Providence Plantations.


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[Assistant] Very recently. Yeaah. Two months ago. Yeaah. Up to two months ago. Cause you can't say plantation. It was called State of Rhode Island and Providence Plantation. Yeaah. Yes. They've been trying forever to get rid of it.


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[Assistant] They voted in 2010 and it failed because they were like, plantation doesn't mean what you think plant, it means colony. But finally, this past election,


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[Assistant] If barely won 52.8 to 47.2, they changed the name just to Rhode Island.


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[Assistant] What are we doing? The official nickname is the Ocean State, because it has many large bays and inlets. There's probably a bunch of them. Yep. State Bird is the Rhode Island Red, which is a chicken.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's a rooster or roosters. Who has sex with the rooster? A chicken. The rooster has sex with all of them. Seinfeld. Uhm, yeah, it's a chicken. Roosters and hens are both chickens. There's the Rhode Island Red. That's a good one.


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[Assistant] Well, yeah, you're right. Cause that's state bird. They have state animals. That's the harbor seal. They have all kinds of.


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[Assistant] She's leaving though to become U S commerce secretary. Oh, no. So she's moving on up. Yeah.


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[Assistant] Uh, Rhode Island has the highest density of electoral votes. In each state. Because they're the smallest.


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[Assistant] But they have a lot of people from being so small, so therefore they have more electoral votes. How many do they get? I think four.


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[Assistant] During prohibition, they were the only state that did not, uh, reject the ratification of the 18th Amendment banning alcohol sales. So they kept it.


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[Assistant] They rejected the idea. So during prohibition when nobody, it was against the law to sell alcohol, they still did it.


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[Assistant] That's an excellent question. I should have researched it more. I don't know.


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[Assistant] Uh, Rhode Island has the highest proportion of Catholic residents of any state. Wow. 41%.


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[Assistant] Uh, so they have the highest percentage of Catholics, but also the oldest existing synagogue, so there's something for your fiancee too. Oldest existing synagogue in the U.S. is in Rhode Island. It was built in 1763. It's the only synagogue in the country during the colonial era. Still the oldest one in North America.


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[Assistant] And the oldest Baptist church in America was founded in Providence in 1683. It's called First Baptist Church in America.


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[Assistant] I never knew, I never even thought about why churches are called First Baptist, First Methodist, First Presbyterian.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I looked it up, it's just whichever one, the first one in that town.


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[Assistant] Oh, like if you were literally the First Baptist Church to settle there, you get to be called First Baptist.


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[Assistant] First Baptist Church in America is their name. So they let everybody know, not just locally.


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[Assistant] This was based on 2013. Average salary was $75,000. That's a lot. Yeaah. Where do teachers get paid? Well, $75,000 in Rhode Island. Man.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey guys, what percentage of Turkish Empire is Africa?


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[Assistant] He just put on in front of a bunch of words and called it a new word. Undressed.


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[Assistant] New, uh, Rhode Island food. They're known for the Rhode Island clam chowder. Oh yeaah. Hot wieners.


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[Assistant] Do you know what a hot winter is, Aaron? I'm in a microwaved hot dog?


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[Assistant] They're small thin hot dogs made of beef, veal, and pork.


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[Assistant] Uhm, in a steamed bun with celery, salt, yellow mustard, chopped onions.


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[Assistant] Shall we wait or keep going? He's gotta gather his thoughts. Another Shakespeare word. Oh man.


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[Assistant] The official state drink of Rhode Island is coffee milk mixing milk with coffee syrup.


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[Assistant] M-mixing milk, coffee syrup? That's what it says. So coffee syrup.


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[Assistant] It's a new, it's a unique syrup invented in Rhode Island and sold at most Rhode Island supermarkets.


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[Assistant] Uh, they also have Johnny Cakes. Johnny Cakes. That was an episode of, uh, Sopranos. Yeah. That was in New Hampshire, I think. Pancakes? Kinda like pancakes, yep. Yeah. Yep.


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[Assistant] Yeaah. Yeaah, it's true with Netflix or anything. But you can get it on your phone.


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[Assistant] No. According to this, it's a fictional Rhode Island city, but Peter Griffin works at the Pawtucket Brewery.


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[Assistant] And that's real. Yea, Seth McFarlane went to the Rhode Island, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right now. You maybe could be a pro, uh, visiting professor.


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[Assistant] You could be like, cause the Michael Scott tearing the book out, that's a play on Dead Poets Society when Robin Williams did it, you know, told him tear the book out.


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[Assistant] But he, his philosophy is kind of what you're saying. Get out there and live life.


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[Assistant] Uh, the Mafia is big in Rhode Island. Especially in a Providence.


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[Assistant] Patriarcha crime family? I hope I'm saying that right so they don't come find me.


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[Assistant] Uh, but they have, uh, they set their headquarters up in Providence. You know, I was thinking about the departed. The two guys that Leonardo DiCaprio beat up in that diner, do you remember that? They were from Providence. So maybe that was a playoff of that.


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[Assistant] Yeah, they're in the crime family, ran their operations in Providence, uh, from the National Cigarette Service Company and Coinomatic Distributors, a vending machine and pinball business.


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[Assistant] Uhm, a giant termite mascot called the big blue bug or also known as nibbles would away.


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[Assistant] Is in Providence, along I-95 in Providence. It's kind of their big thing there. He's 9 feet tall and 58 feet wide. He weighs 4,000 pounds.


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[Assistant] Apparently this was in the Farley Brothers from Rhode Island. They put this bug in Dumb and Dumber and Dumb and Dumber 2.


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[Assistant] It was built in 1980. It's been in several movies, TV shows. It's a cultural landmark by the many locals. It's got to take up most of the state. Yeah.


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[Assistant] He was born in 1881. Yep. Seems like it should be hundreds of years ago, doesn't it?


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[Assistant] Turning to sports. The Pawtucket Red Sox was the AAA affiliate for the Boston Red Sox from 1973 to 2020. So it just ended.


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[Assistant] Yeah, but I think Patucca just lost their team, but the Red Sox moved their AAA team so much.


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[Assistant] The longest game in professional baseball history was in Pawtucket between the Pawtucket Red Sox and Rochester Red Wings. 33 innings!


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[Assistant] The game went 8 hours and 25 minutes and they, uh, the umpire was missing the partner's rule book where he was supposed to stop the game. So he just kept going. And finally they reached the president of the league at like 3am and told him what's going on. He's like, stop the game immediately. So they stopped at 4am.


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[Assistant] Uh, to resume it later, Wade Boggs drove in the tying run, the bottom of the 21st and his teammates groaned.


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[Assistant] He said his dad complimented on four hits. He said, well, I batted 12 times. One guy went over 13.


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[Assistant] You come out of it. It got so cold that players were burning broken bats in the stadium's wooden benches to warm themselves. The clubhouse ran out of food. One guy asked if he could go home.


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[Assistant] And the coach led him. He got home at 3am and his wife didn't believe he was out, you know, he's out drinking all night. And he said, no, the game's still going. It'll be in tomorrow's paper. I'll promise you. And then of course it was too late to get in the next day's paper. So he had to wait two days to show his wife that it really happened.


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[Assistant] And it happened Saturday night into Sunday morning, Easter. When they got done, they ran into people going to sunrise service, Easter service the next day. Wait, so they had to finish it the next day? Well, I mean, they stopped it at 4 AM. And then by the time they got out of there and stuff, people were going to sunrise service for Easter.


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[Assistant] So then they resumed it, uh, a few months later, and by then the major league strike was going on.


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[Assistant] So there was originally 1740 people at the game.


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[Assistant] By the time they stopped the game, there were 19 fans left.


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[Assistant] And they gave them a lifetime pass to the stadium. Wow.


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[Assistant] Players went home arrested, come back the next day for a game.


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[Assistant] But as far as finishing that game, they didn't do it until a couple months later. There was then a sellout crowd of 5,746.


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[Assistant] And 140 reporters from around the world because Major League Baseball was on strike and this was a huge thing that they're playing the 33rd inning, which they finished it in that one inning. And Cal Ripken Jr. tied a record for most played appearances in one game during that game.


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[Assistant] Yep. Opposing teams, but they were, the umpire took his nephew to the game and he said his nephew never attended another game again.


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[Assistant] My buddy went to the Braves game. The Braves met on July 4th when he was a kid. The one that went so many innings and Rick Camp, the pitcher, hit a home run on the 18th to tie it up because they were out of players. But they left before the game was over because they were small.


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[Assistant] The Rochester catcher caught the first 31 innings before being replaced.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's a long, it's a long, you know. So there's a lot of stuff in the baseball hall thing from this game since it was the longest game in school.


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[Assistant] Babe Ruth, it is only minor league home run for them in 1914. They won the world championship in 1884.


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[Assistant] You know. Yeah, so they were, uh, a great team.


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[Assistant] The, uh, Providence Steamroller won the 1928 NFL title. The last team that won a championship.


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[Assistant] They played in a 10,000 seat stadium that was built for bicycle races.


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[Assistant] Called the cyclodrome. So they're, every time they got tackled, they would have to go into the stands. Like if they got tackled out of bounds, they would go into the stands. And their end zone was only five yards in depth because they just didn't have enough room.


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[Assistant] They were the first team to play a game under the lights. They played in solid floodlights in 1930.


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[Assistant] After they won the championship, a lot of their players left. One guy just started selling insurance.


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[Assistant] I mean, you're just like a different person. Questioning your life choices. Questioning everything.


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[Assistant] There's also a basketball team called the Providence Steamrollers. They're one of the original 11 NBA franchises. They set the record for fewest wins in a season with six.


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[Assistant] Well, the guy said he did it because he heard someone say, how'd y'all do? We steamrolled them.


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[Assistant] The steamroller's coach, they were so bad, he activated himself for two games.


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[Assistant] Who, but, but the guy who was the promotion guy that came up with it, he heard theme rolling. Oh yeah, we should say.


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[Assistant] It's still the NBA record for oldest player in NBA, in the NBA game. Wow.


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[Assistant] What is that on his neck? Is that just a mark?


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[Assistant] They, uh, the International Tennis Hall of Fame is in Rhode Island. It's a popular choice. International?


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[Assistant] I don't know if there's a separate tennis hall of fame or not.


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[Assistant] It's known as Little Bet. She was shot to death by a group of masons while crossing a bridge.


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[Assistant] So they shot, uh, they shot this elephant. There's a monument set up for, uh, yeaah.


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[Assistant] I don't know what that is. The plaque is what? That's just the plaque, maybe those people paid to put that monument up.


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[Assistant] Yeah. I think they just, I don't know if they thought it didn't know what it was or they were just being mean.


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[Assistant] But where, was it just in the wild? No, they brought it over. It was, I don't know why it's out just going for a walk.


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[Assistant] The first jail sentence for speeding an automobile was done in Newport, Rhode Island on 1904.


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[Assistant] Yeah. The jail term was for five days. The guy was caught traveling 15 miles per hour.


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[Assistant] His total speed was 15 because back then they just put in.


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[Assistant] Car laws, because back then, if your horse was, carriage was going too fast, you could be sighted. So 15 miles an hour is pretty fast for him.


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[Assistant] You mean just in general? Like in life? Or for... Just for automobiles? For stuff.


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[Assistant] Did you, was your profile picture a picture of you on stage with a microphone?


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[Assistant] Uh, I can't remember the last time I swam in a pool. Me and my fiancee were going to Alaska for our honeymoon. That's how far away I wanted to get from a beach situation.


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[Assistant] Oh, that was, oh man, that was the worst.


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[Assistant] You have, I just wore basketball shorts and you have to stand in this huge line with all these girls you've just met and you're just standing there and you like move up one step at a time. And I was so tired when I got out of the pool that I just collapsed. My legs just collapsed.


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[Assistant] I've never been a major player in one. Yeah, you know how to stay in the background. I was doing karaoke with a buddy in college and somebody jumped him on stage. Wow. And so I just kind of jumped on top of that guy. Yeah. And we knocked over the karaoke machine. What was the song?


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[Assistant] One of my favorite moments was showing up to record one day and the crew was setting up and they're like, what are you guys talking about today?


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[Assistant] Chad and Lindsay Walker, they're probably a married couple.


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[Assistant] My first word was spatula. Spatula? Seriously? That was my toy growing up. Are you serious? 100%. That's a gigantic word, dude. He couldn't say that now. I didn't nail it.


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[Assistant] I think so. I don't know if they wanted that to be my first word, but that's what happened. Cause that was every home video of me as a baby.


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[Assistant] Holding a spatula. That was my toy. That was kinda foreshadowing, huh?


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[Assistant] Cause we didn't pay our soldiers at the civil war, they were all volunteers.


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[Assistant] If you have a one year war, I think you gotta call it that. The war of 1812. Yeaah.


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[Assistant] I worked, uh, or I worked at a country club here in town. They had a, an event for the Daniel Boone society. And it was just people named Daniel Boone.


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[Assistant] So many people are named after him. It's insane. Oh really? And y'all met, and they met there.


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[Assistant] They all met up. It's like their yearly get together. It's all the Daniel Boones get together, see what we're up to.


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[Assistant] Did they talk about Daniel Boone? I didn't stay in there too long. I just kind of poked in, saw everybody.


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[Assistant] Do they get after it? Like is it a party?


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[Assistant] Maybe. If you're on that train, do you wanna know that the other train's coming?


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[Assistant] Are you really asking me? Okay. No, it was just a lot of death and dying.


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[Assistant] Saturday nights, they do the last, the second hour on the CircleNet.


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[Assistant] And she's like, hi, and I'm like, hi. I'd rather fly over the witch, to be honest with you, than actually see it.


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[Assistant] So they might get together like the Daniel Boone society every now and then. Swap ideas. All the witches.


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[Assistant] No. Not a good time. That's a fun accusation to throw around. Yeah.


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[Assistant] No, I didn't. I went to high school with her brother. But you know her. And I met her a few times.


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[Assistant] Oh, we've never even mentioned it? I don't think so. Oh. Yeah, why do you care? Wait, do you care? I don't know. It feels weird to talk about. Why? Let me tell you something.


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[Assistant] I think if I saw her, I'd be like, hey, remember, I always be friends, I'm friends with your brother. She'd be like, ah, yeah.


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[Assistant] That was Johnson or Jackson. I can't remember which one. I don't know.


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[Assistant] If you had to set up the world's fair, what city would you pick? Where would you put it? You got to drop a huge.


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[Assistant] County, it goes all the way down to county. I've never seen a city fair. It's like we stop at county. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] After you talked about that, I went to the Columbus Zoo with my brother and his kid and we, the bald eagle does look like it's running the show. Yeah. It just sits up there. It's looking around.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hello folks. Welcome to the Nate Land Podcast. This is, I am Nate Barghetti with Aaron Weber, Brian Bates. Uh, we got a new slogan. Hello folks. I think it's how you start every show. It's how I want to start my live shows.


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[Assistant] Uh, it's such a good show. Uh, we have kind of a packed show for you. Uh, today, uh, again, thanks for listening, all the subscribing, all that stuff. Uh, but we're gonna just kind of get into it, uh, cause we're, we got a lot. And, uh, so we're gonna read, uh, the comments. Uh, first up, Jordan Butler.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It has become a regular routine for me to end my day watching Nate Land podcast on YouTube before going to bed. Last night I must have fallen asleep on the couch. I learned the next morning that my seven year old daughter had woken up in the middle of the night, found me asleep on the couch with Nate Land on and proceeded to watch one and a half episodes before going back to bed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I love having a podcast show I thoroughly enjoy while not having to be concerned of my kids. Come in for a bit to watch, regardless of my conscious status. Love watching you guys. Keep doing what you're doing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's awesome. That's awesome. Our one and a half episodes, I mean that's a, your daughter was...


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[Assistant] I mean, if it's a typical kid, we're probably a bit of a mood the next day. I mean, that's how.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's when you wake up the next day. But I don't know, sometimes they're not in the mood.


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[Assistant] And so at seven, which mine just turned eight, so.


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[Assistant] They would be with the same age. She would be, you know, I think would.


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[Assistant] We would be like, see, you're in a bad mood. And then she would be like, no, she would be in a good mood just to prove to us that, yeah, I can, I can get up at.


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[Assistant] Do you want some breakfast? All right. She's being fun, you know, worried breakfast. Uh, Paul Chiquitin. G'day lads. G'day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] G'day lads, I live in rural Australia with my wife, three kids and a rooster and some sheep. This podcast comes out at 6 PM Wednesday every...


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[Assistant] In Wednesday evening every week, I look forward to it and I appreciate you putting on such a reasonable time to your dozens of Australian fans. It would be great if you three came and toured Australia, although a dingo is quite likely to run off with bath salts.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Seriously though, love the dry laid back humor. It's actually very Australian. Uh, we'd love to come tour, but as you said, our dozens of fans is going to cost us 10 grand to do that show. I, uh, I've been asked to come to Australia multiple, uh, with, uh, there's a Just For Laughs festival. There's a festival out there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I'm always kind of want to go and we're always trying to kind of plan on it, but it is, it's such a, you know, flight. It's such a thing to go out there. I didn't get it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Young enough and now with my daughter eight, I am going to come, but I want to just, I want her to go, you know, I want, you know, she could get a little more older.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, okay. So what, were you in college or?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In my late twenties? No, yea, I don't know. You don't even know what college is, so. Yea, I don't know. Yea, I was getting my post-doctorate.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My wife went to college late. My dad went to college late. So, uh, alright.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ray Clark, thank you all, Nate, Aaron, and Boomer. Today I took a test to become a certified manager at my work and I was incredibly nervous, but on the drive there I listened to your podcast and it calmed me down so much, I was able to focus and pass my test.


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[Assistant] I love you guys and have been watching since episode 2.


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[Assistant] Yeah. Wasn't it something else like last week? I don't know. Have we talked about it before?


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[Assistant] I thought I heard y'all say that, uh, Diet Coke and something. Diet Coke and M&M's. I thought you said that in the...


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[Assistant] I'll take the Aaron Webber. But yea, then you said peanuts, cause it should be.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. A guy's got two. Yeah. You can get a pretty sweet deal. Mike give it to you. Uh, we'll just be happy to keep.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, he'll throw it in, you know, because then if you throw that CD, hey, you'd look like a nice fellow. I'll throw this CD in. Justin Barcellos, maybe I'm getting old, but podcasts I used to find entertaining are stressing me out. I need to listen to only podcasts like this that are just chill.


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[Assistant] There you go, Justin. That's what this is about, man. I've thought of it more and more. We did shows this past weekend.


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[Assistant] And we're about to go on tour. The drive in, uh, my drive in one night only tour. Tickets are on sale. Uh, I said it, you know, not to randomly promote that, uh, but go buy tickets, all that stuff. It's, uh, it starts this week. Uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yes, I think, you know, there's a lot, man. It's a lot. Uh, you know that, uh, Schitt's Creek, the show? Yeah. Didn't they win all the Emmys?


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[Assistant] I think, you know, it could be, it honestly could be, you could see a swing going, you know, I feel in comedy, you got to end up, you kind of pick and choose where you, cause sometimes you can


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like you're like, well, we need to say something, you know, you want to end up doing something. And, uh, but I think it's, I think it's hard to not say something.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it's, you know, it's like, cause you end up going, well you're seeing everybody, all these videos, all these, these guys get all these views cause they just say something, you know, uh, controversial and they just spread it out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I think it's, you know, there's a lot of that. It's all that. That's all that it is. And I think if you can stay in your lane, which is, I talked to someone about this yesterday, Dan Soat.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, it's like just stay, just do this. And look, and that was good. You don't ever see that. Usually, you think every show is gonna be, it's this, everything is gonna win, everything is, you know, gotta be something that makes people upset.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you're getting, you're going nowhere. You definitely don't come here and leave better.


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[Assistant] I think you leave some nuggets. Yeah, there's some nuggets. And then you leave with just, uh, I don't know. Like you said, like that, you're not stressed out. You just get to leave and be like, I don't know, man. I watched some dumb stuff. I mean, you know, much, I mean, when I watch science, we watch science every night.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That is dumb stuff, like that's, it's just so nice and you need it. I mean, you, there's plenty of times I want to watch something news or something.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's a lot of times, I'm going through these old movies, watching Inception. It's been my third day, still haven't finished it. I'm really focusing on trying to figure out what it's about.


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[Assistant] I think I got it. It's all dreams.


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[Assistant] Well, I remember it being a lot. Yeah, it was, it is. I don't think I really got it. Like you're trying to see.


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[Assistant] You know, I don't know. Him explaining it. It's pretty good. Uh, if you haven't seen Inception, everybody, go check it out. Reynolds Seal. Reynolds Seal. Sounds like a company. Uh, here at Reynolds Seal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's Reynolds rap. We don't just rap it, we seal it. He goes, we uh, he goes, what do you want? Reynolds rap? Where you gotta do it? How about you? Do you want your turkey sealed shut here at Reynolds seal? We.


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[Assistant] Are you tired of, and he's holding up Reynolds rap, are you tired of just the holes falling in? And you think, you know what? I wish I could seal my suit from last night. Well here at Reynolds seal, and then they're in a big fight about it.


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[Assistant] My wife asked me what I'm listening to that makes me laugh so much. Never in a million years would I have thought the answer would have been a podcast about grocery stores. Keep up the Lord's work, boys. Uh, look at that. Grocery stores. Uh, something that Reynolds Sill enjoyed the grocery store.


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[Assistant] Uh, thank you, Reynolds. That's awesome. Yeah. Yeah, that's it. Grocery stores. Uh, Nicole's butcher. And these all sound like stores. Do they not? Nicole's but, you know.


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[Assistant] Here at Nicole's Butcher, we exclusively use Reynolds Seal. I, yeah, I mean it's all just, hi, I'm Nicole, and Nicole's Butcher, and


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[Assistant] Is it Nicole's? It might be Nicholas. Nicholas Butcher.


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[Assistant] Grocery stores? Huh? I can't wait until next week when the team discusses the history of bubbles.


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[Assistant] All right, Nichols, I don't like every... Butcher needs to... Butcher's not a fan. We would do a history of bubbles.


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[Assistant] Justin Squatieri, a few episodes back you read a comment from someone about the happiness, your theme song. Oh, alright. A few episodes back you read a comment from someone about the happiness your theme song brings to them when they hear it start. So naturally you changed it. Great to see you doing what the people want.


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[Assistant] That is very funny. We don't, I mean, yeah. So, about that though.


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[Assistant] Just so you know, I, before we started, I was getting a buddy of mine, a buddy of mine, uh, Doug Brown. He was in the band Safety Suit. Femina Safety Suit.


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[Assistant] And Doug's a songwriter. Now he does, I mean, they say he still do shows, safety suits, but he's songwriting, he's into that. Me and Doug golf a lot. Uh, just a, just a gem of a human being. Wonderful, wonderful fellow. He's got a great family. And, uh, so he wrote the new, and I've completely forgot to mention it because we just kind of put it in.


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[Assistant] But he wrote that new theme song. So that's actually, cause we were trying to, cause someone else said the other one does sound like it's been picked out of.


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[Assistant] Music, you know, like stock, and it was.


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[Assistant] So this one is actually tailored to us. This was written, this was made for us. So that's Doug. So we do have a new theme song. It's a fun one.


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[Assistant] Uh, Matt Parrish. I'd pay good money to see how worried Bronco's face looked on the bird scooter and to see his moving dismount. I'm not, I think I like that whole sentence.


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[Assistant] I pay good money to see how worried Broncos' face looked on the bird scooter. Uh, it just kind of flowed. It shows very good words that flowed together. Broncos, worried Broncos' face, bird scooter. I mean, just a wonderful.


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[Assistant] That sentence is right up my alley. Could you not find that video?


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[Assistant] Lena Peter, watching Aaron get laughed when someone's telling a story is the best. His laugh is completely contagious. That's nice. It's called COVID. Uh, that's very nice. He does get a good laugh. Way to go, Aaron. Thank you. Uh, Anthony Contaldo.


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[Assistant] Do you guys feel constant pressure to come up with new bits to the point where it affects everyday life? Like are you at the zoo with your family preoccupied looking for new material?


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[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, I think you do. I feel pressure.


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[Assistant] I think right now in my act, I need five more minutes and I'd be happy if I could get five minutes somewhere. So I'm kind of aware that I need five minutes. And then once you, once I tape a special, which


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[Assistant] I will be taping a special at the end of October, which is all, that one night only tour is my preparation for that. So come out to that one night only tour. Uh, but when I, when I, when I'm done with this hour, then I'll, yeah, I'll need to come up with a lot of stuff.


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[Assistant] Uh, it gets hard when you actually have your, when you have the axe built, it's hard to add on, but when you have nothing, a clean slate, I feel it's easier to add stuff.


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[Assistant] When I really need stuff, I can kind of get stuff a little quickly. And then when I kind of already am full and it's like, I feel like the axe built and like you're saying I need this extra five minutes, it's a little tough for me to find that five minutes.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's a little harder. A little harder, exactly, that's a good analogy.


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[Assistant] So yes, at the zoo I would be, you know, I can get, you know, I can kind of get zoned out and I'm looking, I watch a lot of people. I like watching interactions with people.


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[Assistant] Uh, you know, I thought, I mean, I think they were worried about it. It wasn't this crazy long out thing. I mean, it was probably 10 years, 11 years before I was at least making as much money as I would be in, at Applebee, like the job I would have.


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[Assistant] So that's the, that's your first where you're going at least, alright, I'm at least, you know, some of you make 20 grand a year and like, that's like big. Uh, so it's, yeah, but I mean, I think our family was definitely concerned. I mean, it was such a weird thing.


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[Assistant] You know, my family comes from entertainment and their family. But they're good now? Yeah, they're fine now. They get it.


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[Assistant] Uh, I don't think her mom likes this podcast, but uh, we talked about that. She goes, I was talking to her about it and she's, she's wonderful. And she gets, she's like, so what? Just like asking a lot of, so we all just.


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[Assistant] You don't, I mean, it just seems like you don't really talk about it. You know, it's exactly like the grocery store bubbles.


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[Assistant] I, uh, Arthur Newman. Aaron is right about the Disney signature logo. The D looks like a G. It does if it's back, I mean, if we're just saying stuff can be backwards and look, an I looks like a one if it's upside down. So I guess that's what we're agreeing on.


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[Assistant] Well apparently we got a lot of dumb listeners.


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[Assistant] Uh, no, I'd never, I'd never heard the D. I said it to, uh, Harper and Carter from, uh, both eight years old and they both disagreed. Carter did say, oh, yeah, it looks like it could be a G backwards.


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[Assistant] But I mean, I guess if we're opening the logic of going the words are just backwards, then I mean, they could all be something.


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[Assistant] I mean the Y looks like a broomstick if you turn it upside down it's an H. I mean like there's a million, you know, I didn't know that we could just do whatever we want.


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[Assistant] You never know when you might happen upon a Talladega turn four style pile up. They literally should have yellow flags and a pace card to keep the carnage under control. That's funny. Just people just seeing them just come around corners just flying. Uh, not thinking.


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[Assistant] They know, just let it go. Let them cry it out. Let them cry it out. I mean, it is, it's like being at those, it's like being a parent.


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[Assistant] That's exactly what it, if you want to know what being a parent is like, I guess go work at Walmart. If you're, if you're like, Hey, I'd like to get a trial run at being a parent, go to Walmart. You're going to let them cry and do whatever.


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[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, when a kid gets hurt, sometimes it's, or if they do, instead of going over and be like, are you okay? Well, you kind of like let them, it's a tension, you know, if they're not really hurt.


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[Assistant] Uh, I've had plenty of that where they just kinda go, it's fine.


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[Assistant] Hi, uh, uh, Jonathan Orrick. My family and I were going on vacation a couple weeks ago and stopped at a Wendy's for a bite to eat. Me, my wife, and my brother were in one car, first in line. My mom, dad, and our sons were in the car behind us. We ordered and then we got to the window. I said, I'd like to pay for mine and the vehicle behind me. You could tell the poor girl working the window.


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[Assistant] She didn't have a clue what I was talking about after some lengthy explaining. She let me pay for both.


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[Assistant] My dad got to the window and she told him his was paid for.


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[Assistant] When, a minute ago, one minute ago, we used to do stuff like that all the time, but now we don't, now not anymore. That's so funny.


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[Assistant] I mean, I just love the explanation. There's definitely times you try to do something nice and the person cannot wrap their head around it and you go, it's just not worth it.


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[Assistant] That's crazy that this guy, this guy stuck it out. I mean, that's so funny. He's like, all right, I'll just keep playing. We don't do that here anymore. I mean, she, I mean, she was probably so thrilled that that car was gone. Like, all right.


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[Assistant] Oh, what a nightmare. And then yours has already been paid for and then just again, just right back in it. And I mean, good for her for that answer. We don't do that here anymore. Oh, that's wonderful.


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[Assistant] Here we go. This is going to be a tough one. Rick, no, I'm amazed. Bartholomew. Is that how you say it? I don't know how to say that. Bartholomew. Yeah. Oh, that is Bartholomew.


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[Assistant] We interact the first time. Oh. I have a real hard time with that word. Bartholomew.


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[Assistant] I am amazed Bartholomew did not google peanuts and coke.


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[Assistant] The history is pretty great. Workers would do it to not touch their peanuts with their dirty hands. Great podcast gents. I didn't know that. Makes sense. I guess like up there cause they don't, I mean, just don't eat peanuts.


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[Assistant] Uh, I guess they're really not that bad. It's just so funny to think that they don't, you know, it's like, well, how are we going to carry them? Oh, we'll just ruin them. Like that isn't like-


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[Assistant] I know, but they kinda are. I mean, it's just, it's kind of insane to go, I don't want to grab these peanuts. You know what? Just ruin the whole point of them and pour them in your drink. Like, who thinks to do that?


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[Assistant] Yeaah, I don't, I don't know. It's just such a funny idea to think, uhm.


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[Assistant] Like, you know, I'm trying to think what else, you know, if you're like trying to kill you, like, I got a sandwich and I'm, I don't want you to get it dirty. I just, you know, put it in your water bottle.


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[Assistant] That's what the coke is what I'm talking about. Like that's the whole point of this. That's normal. I would put chips on my sandwich.


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[Assistant] I don't know how that does it. You know.


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[Assistant] Anyway, I'm gonna go put water. Yeah, you know, could I get some, uh,


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[Assistant] Orange is in the wa- just something. You know what, I never like oranges, like my hands ticky, so I just put them in my sweet tea.


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[Assistant] I didn't have pockets, so I just threw my keys in there.


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[Assistant] Uh, Bob Hafner, another great edition of Finish Nate's Thoughts Yourself. I do do that a lot.


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[Assistant] So, you know what? I'll let y'all jump in too.


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[Assistant] A little exercise. Cameron Rodriguez, when Blanket Bates, Blanket's a wonderful name. When Blanket Bates reads it like he was called on to read for the class and he's trying to impress the teacher, but still sound cool by not caring that much. That's true.


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[Assistant] I'm, hey, are you here? I'm breakfast. My name's, you don't think I know breakfast, but I know breakfast. Here at Waffle House, we do breakfast all day long.


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[Assistant] I mean, you think he, I think you'd be the first to be doing some commercials. Yeah. You guys don't know what I got going on. Hello folks.


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[Assistant] Chris Cybert, who's gonna tell Nate there's no such thing as tostino's pizza? I know, it's my favorite though. Totino's, right?


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[Assistant] I was even thought I was wrong, but you know, I was, I might as well just go in. I love them. I've eaten two of them after these shows this weekend. I just, I mean, that's my, almost my favorite pizza. I just, you know, so good.


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[Assistant] I used to love Piggie Wiggly's pizza. We used to eat that at, like, my brief volunteer state community college. We'd drive home to my parents afterwards and we'd cook those, uh,


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[Assistant] Like small self, like you just make your own little piggie pizza is wonderful. I like bad pizza. The lunch pizza that's square rectangle. Oh yeah. That's.


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[Assistant] Yeah, that's good. I know. So I go eat lunch with my daughter at her school and they have that. I'll take two, please. Red beard. The only information Nate got right about big red was the name big red from Texas cream soda.


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[Assistant] Well, my dad drinks it. I got that right.


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[Assistant] Take that red beard. Yeah. Red beard, yeah.


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[Assistant] I feel like he just gets called in on all red things. Hey red, this guy got big red wrong. What?


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[Assistant] It's just anything red. The gum? The, yeah.


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[Assistant] Maybe it's just me, but I feel like Britches is getting a little too big for his Brian's. It was easier to feel bad for him when he seemed like an innocent victim.


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[Assistant] But now he either plays up the attacks for sympathy or throw some zingers back at Nate. I feel like saying, okay, just remember your place, bud. All three of y'all are hilarious though. Thanks for a great podcast. That's.


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[Assistant] I didn't think y'all would read my comment like that, but I, yeah, this, I mean, Derek's my favorite. My brother's name is Derek, spelled exactly like you and he, Derek gets it. You know what I mean? I think it's true.


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[Assistant] You know what I mean, I'm slowly getting out of this.


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[Assistant] Apologize. Yeaah. I'm glad they see it. Maybe get to him. He always yells at me like I'm the problem. That's right. And we're starting to see a little bit. Am I the problem?


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[Assistant] Yeah, maybe it's just me, but I feel like Britches is getting a little too big for his Brian's. That's well done. That was, yeah. I said brains. I messed it up out the gate.


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[Assistant] Michael Farah, fun fact, Go Set a Watchman was written by Harper Lee before To Kill a Mockingbird, but published way later. Go Set a Watchman. You don't know everything, Aaron.


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[Assistant] Because the name's not. To Kill a Mockingbird was a prequel, I guess, to this. Yea, To Kill a Mockingbird is a great name. Interesting. Ghost Set of Watchmen, I don't know, maybe it's a good book name. It sounds like a book. Ghost Set of Watchmen, I'm not reading that. Uh, I would say that first. Have you, you know Ghost Set of Watchmen? I'm not reading that. Well, I didn't say it was a book. Sounds like a book.


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[Assistant] Christopher Scroggen, Nate said there's cats in New York bodegas about five times. I wonder if he realizes there's a correlation to keep rats out. Uh, yeaah, I did.


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[Assistant] It doesn't, I mean, they act like that's, that's like normal, that you're going, you know what? The Kroger here, they don't have cats running around to keep the rats out. There's a, there's a, I do know that that's why they do it, but.


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[Assistant] I mean, just kind of, like, it's not like it's like, yeah, yeah, so cats can lay on the food. Right. There's probably other ways.


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[Assistant] Uh, you're in New York City, you're not in, you know, just the, just the desert somewhere trying to survive.


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[Assistant] Lee Kelly, it's definitely time that burrito brought out some merch.


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[Assistant] I would happily buy a hello folks t-shirt.


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[Assistant] Lee, I bet you're, I bet he's getting them printed right now. So you're in luck.


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[Assistant] I'll have it. Torino Shanta. They always make fun of barn, barnyard for being an old man. But when Nate starts ranting and his pure 70 year old grandfather getting worked up about technology, not working and tipping the youths. That is true.


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[Assistant] Uh, Torin. Maybe I said Torino. Totino's. Totino's Shanta.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I do get, I have no problem tipping the youth. I have a problem if, uh, I've actually talked to my neighbor about it. I'm fine with tipping the youth. I think it's good. But if you go into a business and you do all the work, there's a point.


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[Assistant] Hey, I know you're gonna go make up all your own food in there, but can I have $10 for college? Yeah. Undergrad? Post-grad? Yeah, undergrad, post-grad. Bachelor?


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[Assistant] Underground? Early grad? Barfyman362, guys, please try and get Nate's dad on the podcast and talk about magic. I'm an amateur magician and would love to see, would love to hear some of the stories he has to share from his experience performing. Cheers for the episode. Much love. Well.


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[Assistant] Alright, uh, barfuman362, you are in luck.


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[Assistant] In the game, and I have to go sit down. I can't dribble with my, I can't, the ball can't touch my left hand. My thumb hurts so bad. And my dad yelled at me to get back in the game. I got back in the game, and I just can't dribble.


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[Assistant] It's just not working. And then I have to go back out. You had two hands. That's what I was talking about. Well, but then they were mad at me. Dad was mad at me and we go to the hospital with them.


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[Assistant] My dad's dad still hasn't learned. He still makes even the grandkids. Get out there. We all get it.


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[Assistant] Uh, alright, uh, thanks for coming on. This is, uh, everybody always asks, this is, show them the, your IBM. Dad is the president of IBM International Brotherhood of Magicians. We're very proud of him. Uh, did you do it for one year?


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[Assistant] And what is it, tell people know what it is because people won't listen to this. It's, I mean, it's the main, it's the biggest.


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[Assistant] They want to show you how to, because now I'm probably in art to go and here's how I did it. But I mean, there's some, but some people have, you know, I mean, on that show, what is it, the pen and teller where they have to guess how the trick, I mean, there's been people that they can't guess, right? A lot of people, a lot of people.


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[Assistant] Is there anybody that has any trick that they just don't tell them how it's done? Is there any?


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[Assistant] Because Brian and Dad have done shows without me. Like yeaah. Well, if we're all doing one together, but then y'all have done them separately, where I haven't been there.


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[Assistant] You guys on match? What, uh, let's read some of this, the past of, uh, did you know the earliest known trick?


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[Assistant] They probably think it's real. If they can convince you that it's real, then they've convinced themselves that it's real.


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[Assistant] Well, cause that should be enough. That should be enough for you that you can make this person not know what you're doing.


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[Assistant] Tell them to look way over here. It's this tiny area and then they can trick you.


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[Assistant] Clip, right? We're post, we're post the clip cause people, some people are listening. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They can't watch. Uh, so we're post the clip, uh, so just go to NateLand social media and you'll be able to see that clip. That's crazy. See the trick.


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[Assistant] It's great. I mean that's, that's what we used to buy dad every Christmas. Every birthday, every anything. It was a deck of cards. It was our, it was our tie. That's right. Like a typical tie you'd buy your dad. That was our tie. It was just cards. You could always buy a deck.


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[Assistant] Well, you won't be able to go, I mean, did you have it like towards the, you know, when you would, cause you'd have to pick someone to bring them on stage now. I mean, people could guess they see you. They're going to be like, Oh, I bet that's his day.


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[Assistant] We got a pack of them. You know who used to buy package shirts at Walmart? Uh, Dan Soder. Dan Soder would go, we were on the road once and we go into a Walmart and he just grabs a stack of jeans and then just buys them and he goes, oh, I'm good now. And just, they would just buy a whole stack of jeans, like an old man.


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[Assistant] And I was like, what are you, you don't buy something? He goes, no, these are good. You just buy a pack of these. Like jeans. Yeah. Crazy. Uh, so we looked up some of the famous magicians of, uh,


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[Assistant] The earliest magician to pull rabbit out of a hat was Louis Comte. Is that it? Yeah. I think so.


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[Assistant] I'm not doing it. Uh, Jean, uh, Eugene, Robert, Houdini.


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[Assistant] Maker, magician of lucidness, wildly recognizes the father of the modern style of magic. In the 1800s, he transformed magic from a pastime for the lower classes, seeing it fares to an entertainment for the wealthy.


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[Assistant] Which he offered in a theater opened in Paris, a legacy preserved by the tradition of modern magicians to perform in tales.


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[Assistant] It's like, like he just did one where he held onto balloons. Like he's doing, you know, it's like, you want to see how long I can sleep on your couch for two months? Like it's like a very, it's not a magic trick. It's just, uh, he just, that's all, that's all his tricks are just kind of like something like that. Uh, but yeah, he's, uh, yeah, everybody likes him. Yeah, I do. I, I.


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[Assistant] It's the same with the magic. You, anybody can do a trick or anybody can tell five minutes of jokes. It's to do a show. Could they do their own show? If you go watch David Blaine for an hour, is it going to be a great show? And it's a great show.


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[Assistant] Well, cause Houdini was, well, cause there's a mix of, uh,


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[Assistant] Guys being like David Blaine where it's like you're a magician, but it's like he's also


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[Assistant] Can be underwater for- It's like escape artist, right? Yea, yea, yea.


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[Assistant] Yeah, so it's both things. It's like he's truly, and probably back then, there wasn't, that's what you would have done. I mean now magic is.


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[Assistant] Like everything, everything's so much wider, so you can just specifically be, I only do these sleight of hand. All right, you know, Dave Copperfield, he does these gigantic tricks versus does he do any sleight of hand, like Copperfield? Yeah. He can, yeah, yeah. He doesn't, yeah, but a lot of it's a big show.


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[Assistant] Cause in this, so this guy saw Houdini, he did a trick for him, so he's an older guy.


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[Assistant] Same way I always say with comedy. Comedy, all you can hope for is to be in the...


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[Assistant] Well, you're in the history of magic. Yes, I am. That's right. I think that's what you want to be in the history of whatever your thing is. If you can get in the history of it, that's crazy. That's not an easy thing to do. Well, I mean, this says Houdini.


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[Assistant] What about him dying? So that's the big, uh, that's always the big story with, you know, Houdini died of a ruptured appendix in 1926.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I think that's right. Yeah. So yeah, so I mean, he would have, I mean, yeah, that's crazy. Cause I mean, he could have lived another 30 years, you know, uh, and be born in 56, you know, which would have been, you probably have, is there, you know, you probably have a lot more on him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you'd have had a lot of stuff on them if you would have lived to then. That's pretty crazy. Uh, that's like a David Blaine thing where he's.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's crazy. It's a, it's a mix. I'm not doing that. Yeah. It's a, yeah, it's a mix of, uh, I mean, that is, that seems like that's the way those guys did. Those guys had to be a show. They had to be a whole show. And so on top of like watch this trick, they could also, they would also have this weird stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah. That's uh, well for him to do, I mean, that's funny to think that, I mean, it's been impressive for him to get out in a minute.


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[Assistant] I mean what did they, could they, you know, it was good just to show it.


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[Assistant] They let us walk on, we gotta walk on stage and uh, touch the box or something. Remember that?


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[Assistant] You know, I always, cause my line that I would say, they go, can you do magic? It's like, uh, I can't do any magic, but I can ruin it for you. But they're, uh, yeah. Cause people always say they want to know. I don't know. Some people say they don't.


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[Assistant] You know, they're like, I don't wanna know. I like not knowing. Uh, and some people do wanna, some people do wanna know.


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[Assistant] In 1980, Dorothy Dietrich in her teens became the first and as of 2019, the only woman to do the jinxed bullet catch in her mouth often referred to as the


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[Assistant] I'm sorry. They filmed it. Yeah. And, uh, yeah, I mean, that's, I mean, uh, Penn and Taylor did that.


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[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah, then they can't tell. Uh, some of these tricks that have gone wrong is you have some of those in, I mean, have you heard of some of those?


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[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, it's like, why even run the risk? Yeah. You know, it's like you just, yeah.


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[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a much better show. Read the first, the Just For Birth.


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[Assistant] Yeah. And he did it to himself. And then, I mean, and especially with people watching, you know, when you're there so they could help, you know, it's not like no one can help you. Everybody can help you, but no one knows to help you. That's like a trick that you'd have to go. I mean, is it worth it? Are people nowadays? I don't know how much this stuff is worth because everybody's seen everything with the internet.


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[Assistant] It's hard to impress people. And so if you're like, I'm gonna do this.


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[Assistant] You just got some guy going, well I bet he's doing something else. And then they don't care as much.


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[Assistant] And so they don't appreciate it as much, so why even run the risk of doing it?


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[Assistant] Yeah. Uh, Magician Swallows Acid on Vietnam's Got Talent. Vietnam's Got Talent Semi-Finalist.


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[Assistant] Fat got one of the contest judges to come on stage and shuffle the glasses around, including the one containing sulfuric acid. He claimed he could, he would use his magic to work out which glass had the dangerous substance. However, the judges looked on, he chose wrong. He sped out the acid as soon as he realized.


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[Assistant] But not before his lips had swollen up and pain had shot through him according to reports. He was raised at the hospital and treated for second degree burns.


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[Assistant] David Blaine, uh, lacerates throat trying to catch bullet in his mouth. He risked death when he shot himself in the mouth during a bullet catching.


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[Assistant] His gum shield shattered and he felt an impact on the back of his throat. At that time, Blaine believed the bullet had gone through his head and that he was dead, but fortunately he survived the only lacerated throat.


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[Assistant] Wanna see it? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know if I wanna see it. I mean, you know, it's not bad.


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[Assistant] Yeah, the middle thing can stop it and it went wrong and then it went through the back of his. It just went in the straw and hit it. Yeah, it just kind of shattered the piece that he had in his mouth. Oh, that's, that's crazy. Yeah.


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[Assistant] Uh, alright, we, uh, we're about to have to get out of here.


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[Assistant] That's a good, uh, it was the long, long before I know America. He was on America's Got Talent, long snapper for the Eagles and has always been a magician.


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[Assistant] That's awesome. Yeaah. So he's a great guy. That's how long it takes to learn all that stuff.


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[Assistant] So I know we didn't get to some stuff, but I think we're, I mean, we're just do, you know, I was like, this is one thing where I want to talk about is the, our magicians band and casino and counting cards and all that stuff. I think it'd be fun, but I think we should just do an episode of casinos and we'll just have you come back and cause you know all that stuff.


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[Assistant] That would be, cause that would be a whole fun episode to talk about casinos and then talk about cards and all that stuff. And I'm sure people have questions for you. So, uh, we're figuring out, come back and do another episode with, uh, with my dad. Uh, so, but yeah, that's it. I think that's, do we have anything else? I don't think so.


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[Assistant] Yeah, we're going to post, so we will post the, if you're listening at home and you want to see any of these videos, we'll post the tricks on the Instagram, Twitter, you know, specifically those tricks so you can just see what those tricks were.


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[Assistant] We're posting stuff with my dad that, uh, you know, the, uh, straight jacket stuff and all that. Uh, yeah. And go to IBM, uh, magicians.org. If you want to be a magician, that's what you get. You got to get in that world.


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[Assistant] So, alright, thank you guys very much for listening. Thanks for liking, rating, although, you know, it means the world to us. And, uh, you're the best. So, alright, see you next week.


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[Assistant] Have you heard about bare bones? I think Nate's made that argument with me before.


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[Assistant] Yeah, even if 99.9% were faking or just wrong.


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[Assistant] 0.1% then it's still the craziest thing ever.


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[Assistant] Don't mess with those people. When I was a kid, I thought there was just one Bigfoot. It's Bigfoot. Just one.


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[Assistant] If, but if they're so smart, cause that's kind of argument, right? They don't want to be found. And then I would see these videos online, which I was researching and there's just occasional one just walking around and- Is it because you're out in the open?


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[Assistant] I was surprised when I did the research. Chupacabra, that's a relatively new creature, right?


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[Assistant] I mean, I think it was like within the last 20 or 30 years.


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[Assistant] There's a database when I was doing research for this of all Bigfoot sightings.


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[Assistant] What about the, uh, that the Patterson video, the most famous Bigfoot? Do you think that's real?


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[Assistant] They can't recreate it, uh, supposedly. This is the guy walking?


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[Assistant] Do they take it, do they have fun with it or is it very serious?


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[Assistant] But then here's, here's a, this is a famous Bigfoot video, the longest video, uh, there is of one, and this is a youth group.


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[Assistant] That was on a Christian youth group. Well, sorry, I thought it started, got more into it here. Uh, they finally zoom in on it. Yeah, I've seen this. You've seen this? Yeah. It's very, uh,


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[Assistant] They're not thinking, oh my gosh, this is a big foot. There's a bunch of kids are like kind of goofing around. What is this thing? But it's, uh, you know.


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[Assistant] Okay. This is uh, this is the last one I'll show you. This is a video, guys. They think this is a bear. Right there. This is two boys.


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[Assistant] And they think they're zooming in on a black bear. Looks like a black bear right there, right?


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[Assistant] They're just kind of checking it out and then it stands up right there.


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[Assistant] Is that what you hear though when you listen to those podcasts or interviews that people are saying that the governments are coming in and telling them keep your mouth shut?


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[Assistant] If you had to pick one, did you only believe in one, Aliens or Bigfoot?


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[Assistant] We talked about switching out the people in the car and they messed up.


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[Assistant] If you could choose just one for you, which one would it be? Bigfoot or? I mean, I love Bigfoot.


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[Assistant] Goes on forever. We don't know what's out there. Whereas on this planet,


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[Assistant] Well, that's like the soldier's name. There's a few more on here. Uh, the first lady he ran the United States. I mean, I ain't even heard about this, but apparently Woodrow Wilson's wife, uh, was doing some things while he had a stroke.


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[Assistant] Yeah, there's one you mentioned on, on here when we talked about, uh, three identical strangers, that program where they were taking children and separating them to do studies on them.


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[Assistant] A lot of weeks in the comments, the next week someone will say, Nate was actually right. He's ahead of his time somehow.


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[Assistant] They, the argument, the argument is the reason we've never found in all our vast searching


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[Assistant] The argument is in all our searching of all the cosmos, one argument is maybe because they've long since destroyed themselves.


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[Assistant] A lot of people don't know that, but yeaah.


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[Assistant] Cause it's right by the campus there, right? I used to work right around the corner from there. We'd go there for lunch all the time.


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[Assistant] On music, bro. Oh yea? Just like doing music stuff? Just doing big- It's very vague.


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[Assistant] Well, we would get, this is truly once a week, somebody would walk in thinking we were a music place. And like some guy would show up. He's like, I'm from Texas. This is my CD. Like I drove all the way here trying to make it.


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[Assistant] Exactly. I guess it just thinks you just walk in random places and give them your music. We would take it. We'd be like, all right, we'll see what we can do. We had nothing to do with music.


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[Assistant] And what did y'all do? We were a social media company. Oh, yeah.


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[Assistant] I'm not great at anything, I'm pretty good at a lot of different stuff.


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[Assistant] Okay, we got a guitar and a keyboard. Did you bail on the xylophone?


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[Assistant] I never got good at the xylophone cause you could never, I could never practice at home. I don't know how, like who has a xylophone in their house?


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[Assistant] If I had a, no, I wouldn't, but I've never done a show where Xylophone is around.


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[Assistant] Take people in back rooms and I bet that really goes on, but.


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[Assistant] You think they'd be fine with it if you were just up front?


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[Assistant] But this, the Price is Right guy, it couldn't happen now, right? Because he, he, back in the day, because...


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[Assistant] You know, once something aired on television and didn't air again for a week, they would reuse prizes on the prices, right? And they don't do that anymore because of this guy.


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[Assistant] Right. Wasn't that part of it? This and DVR. Yeah.


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[Assistant] So this guy, that guy had a big spreadsheet, kept track of everything, just dominated.


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[Assistant] What would make you choose the one that's slightly more expensive? Is there anything about the gas station that would make you go, I'm willing to pay?


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[Assistant] You're saying he's just so far removed from a normal life. He's like a corporation at this point. I think he is a corporation. All the money coming in and out. He's not even seeing it. He, you know, he's not doing his own shopping. He's not going to... He can't. Yeaah.


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[Assistant] Oh, he owns Louis Vuitton, Sephora, he owns a bunch of luxury brands like that.


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[Assistant] I saw this on Reddit yesterday about a visualization of the difference between a million and a billion dollars. I'm always fascinated by these. If you took one million one dollar bills and you stacked them up and you laid them down on their side,


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[Assistant] That stack of 1 million 1 dollar bills would be about 120 yards long. So it'd take you, you know, a minute and a half.


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[Assistant] No. Okay. Well now, let's say we have a, so it takes about a, how long to walk 120 yards? Maybe a minute and a half?


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[Assistant] If you took one billion one dollar bills.


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[Assistant] And stack those up and laid it down on its side. How long do you think that stack would be? I mean, it's gotta be...


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[Assistant] An hour. Okay, so that's the difference. You go from walking a minute and a half to driving for an hour. That's the difference between a million and a billion. If you go to a trillion, which people are talking about Jeff Bezos being a trillionaire, then that's 68,000 miles, which is like two and a half times around the circumference of the earth.


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[Assistant] I think it was, you can, they can, you have two options. You can donate that change to charity that they would have given you or they put it on your crook, your, like your loyalty card.


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[Assistant] So in 2018, the, I mean the government paid 39 billion.


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[Assistant] You cure cancer, here's a billion dollars. I would, I figured something out.


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[Assistant] Who do you think has more of a right to their $59 billion? Mackenzie Bezos or Pablo Escobar?


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[Assistant] I was saying one, you know, one acquired it through a divorce. The other one acquired it through murder.


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[Assistant] See, that's the thing, these, the cartel, I mean, how, they probably have more money liquid than any of these people.


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[Assistant] Because, you know, I, I don't know what it's like being this rich, but I imagine most of their net worth is tied up. It's like having a lot of instruments at your house.


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[Assistant] Is he killing him through the drive-thru? Like, he would...


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[Assistant] Wow. I figured you'd just do it through the drive thru.


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[Assistant] So he got the, he got the death sentence. Wow.


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[Assistant] So, he's like deliberating out loud, so he's like, ah, it could be A.


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[Assistant] Okay. Or it's not knowledge based. It's not like a trivia.


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[Assistant] I think they're probably from there. I don't think they go, I want to get into drugs. Where should I go?


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[Assistant] Hey weirdos, I'm Ash. And I'm Elena. And this is morbid.


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[Assistant] This is morbid. Yeah. You know what I forgot? What'd you forget? A couple, like, I think it was like last week this happened, and I was gonna say...


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[Assistant] I was Anna for their birthday party a few years ago. I have an Anna gown. I do have an Anna gown.


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[Assistant] They wanted me to dress up as Queen Anna a couple years ago, so I did. It's mom shit. Uh, this was a few years ago. So they were like, oh, wear your Anna gown. And I was like, first of all, that's going to be a little tough because it's going to be crazy there. First of all, never. Second of all, don't know if I can fit into that Anna gown still. Like it's one of those situations where you're like, I don't know.


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[Assistant] Who knows? Like, that was a few years ago. You're like, that's a gamble that I'm not really in the mood for today. And you know what? Whatever. Like, bodies change. I'm not concerned about it, but like, I don't want to try to fit into it either. No. Why ruin my day? I was like, you know what, is there any other, I was like, how about I do my hair like Queen Anna? So I did like the braid. It looked cute. Like the braid or crown thing.


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[Assistant] And I was like, and I was like, is there anything else I can do? And so they gave me like the cape, the Queen Anna cape, so like.


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[Assistant] I had all three girls because they all decided they had to go to the bathroom at the same time. Girls go to the bathroom in packs. Only one of them had to. Yea, it's just a girl thing. But they did make me and John get them all through the crowd and then John was like godspeed and just waited outside.


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[Assistant] So we go in there, it's just mania. And one of our listeners, hi, if you're listening, I was just like, hey, what's up? And she got carried away by a crowd. I was like, bye.


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[Assistant] Not Christoph. Weirdly it was on Hans, which I was like, don't love that for us. Cause John does not have much jobs, but like sure.


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[Assistant] Uh, but yeaah, so that was fun. Uhm, and before we get into this, you know, our part two of Ed Gein here, which, uh, by the way,


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[Assistant] Is gonna be the gross part. Oh goody, we just did some lunch, so that's good. Yeaah, it's gonna get, just blanket trigger warning over this entire thing, cause I honestly don't know how to insert enough trigger warnings into this thing. I'll just be saying the word trigger warning a hundred times and that'll annoy everybody and me. So I'm just gonna say it right now.


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[Assistant] This is a rough one, we're gonna talk about mutilation, we're gonna talk about some really horrible...


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[Assistant] Trinkets that he took from actual human bodies. We're going to be talking about vulvas in a box. So just like know that that's where this is going.


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[Assistant] Uh, but before I draw, you know, jump into that, why don't I just give you a nice little, uh, Tik Tok recommendation. Oh, I love those. Let's go. I haven't done one of those in a little while. Party. I follow this gal. Uh, her name is Becky Ann Gallentine because her, uh, handle on Twitter or Twitter.


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[Assistant] She's fascinating. She's, uh, she collects her and her boyfriend, I believe, uh, they collect haunted objects. And they'll do these live streams where they kind of like


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[Assistant] You know, have a camera on the haunted object. They'll go through it. Really interesting shit. They're just like, they have a really interesting collection. She is so smart and so knowledgeable. She goes through a lot of like,


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[Assistant] Historical, you know, Victorian death practices, she'll go through like different really fascinating graves around.


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[Assistant] Especially New England, around New England that like you can find and all the history behind them.


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[Assistant] She's just really knowledgeable. She's really fun to watch. I think she's great. I think you should follow her. She's very interesting. Let's go.


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[Assistant] Follow her before the TikTok goes away. Before the TikTok goes away, get as much as you can. Uh, but, but yeah, go to follow her and now on to, uh, really horrific shit. So, everybody hang tight. Be really brave. Now when we left you.


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[Assistant] We were talking about the disappearance of Mary Hogan.


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[Assistant] The tavern owner who Ed Gein had taken a liking to.


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[Assistant] Uh, she was gone without a trace as far as they were concerned. We also touched upon the disappearance


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[Assistant] In October 1953 of 15 year old Evelyn Hartley.


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[Assistant] Uh, she was the babysitter who disappeared, but her father couldn't get a hold of her.


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[Assistant] Found that she wasn't there when he went to the house, found I think her glasses and like shoes on the ground, a blood trail leading outside, like.


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[Assistant] But that one in particular is gonna come back. Okay, at least a little bit.


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[Assistant] So following Mary Hogan's disappearance, it wasn't lost on many Plainfield locals that Ed


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[Assistant] Was interested in the missing tavern owner. Like people had seen that. It was pretty obvious. In fact, whenever the subject came up in front of Ed, he would say with a grin, she's at the farm now. I went and got her in my pickup and took her there. I took her home.


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[Assistant] And, uh, anyone look into that? So he would just, they'd be like, oh, you know, like that Mary Hogan thing is pretty wild, huh, Ed? And he'd just be like, oh yeah, she's at the farm now. But he'd be like grinning, like. So they thought he was joking.


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[Assistant] Yeaah, we should always look into these things, guys. I was just gonna say! And knowing that he'd always been a little odd, and he kinda said some weird stuff.


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[Assistant] And everyone kind of thought like he's so shy, nobody knew, like, I think a lot of people assumed he was also...


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[Assistant] Unintelligent because he was so quiet and a little odd.


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[Assistant] That they didn't think he real, they were like, oh, he's just saying things like, you know. You know what they say about assuming. Yeah. So everyone just kind of brushed off the comments that like,


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[Assistant] So, that wasn't the only time Ed seemed suspicious to others. There was also the time that the teenage son of local store owners, Irene and Lester Hill, told his parents of horrifying things that he had seen at Gein's house. Oh.


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[Assistant] Bob Hill was probably the closest thing Ed had to a friend. He was much younger than him.


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[Assistant] Uhm, and he was one of the very few people who had ever been to the Gein farm, ever.


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[Assistant] Uh, before or after Augusta's death. So this was like a big deal. Wow. And according to Schechter, uhm, whose book we have linked in the show notes, it was one of those, it was on one of those visits that Ed showed Bob, quote, a pair of preserved human heads.


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[Assistant] Now, the thing is, Ed claimed these were genuine South Sea shrunken heads sent by a cousin who had fought in the Philippines during the war. So he's saying like these are...


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[Assistant] He's like, oh, these are like artifacts, kind of thing. And Bob wasn't the only plain-filled child to have seen the heads. And he wasn't the only one to report having seen them in Gein's house. But like Ed's comments about Mary Hogan, few, if any of the residents really thought much of these reports.


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[Assistant] As Schecter points out in the book, quote, a set of shrunken heads from the South Pacific was exactly the sort of collectible you'd expect someone like Eddie Gaine to own. Okay. So this is weird.


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[Assistant] It might have been written off as him just being a weird guy. Yeah. The only thing that I can say is I really don't understand thinking that it's just a joke that he's like, Mary Hogan's at my farm. Someone should have called and been like,


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[Assistant] In hindsight, like we just said, the residents of Plainfield probably regret not taking these things seriously. But in 1957,


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[Assistant] But in 1957, very few Americans in the Midwest, or really anywhere else, because remember this is the Midwest too, uhm, very few of them would have believed their neighbors to be capable of murder at all, much less any of the other crimes that he ended up committing.


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[Assistant] Uh, in fact, the shocking murder, and this will kind of put it into perspective a little more like time wise, this helped me.


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[Assistant] The shocking murder of the Clutter family in Holcomb, Kansas, uhm, you know, detailed by Truman Capote's book in Cold Blood, that was still nearly two years away from happening. Wow. That hadn't even happened yet.


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[Assistant] And most believed murder to be something confined to, you know, on it, like what they thought was the morally


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[Assistant] Uhm, but still, I'm sure a lot of people look back and were like,


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[Assistant] Where it's supposed to be safe, it's supposed to be quiet. Again, the inkhole blood clutter family murders haven't even happened yet.


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[Assistant] Now, November 16th marked the beginning of deer hunting season in Washara County. Uhm, and this was a time when nearly every man and boy ventured out into the woods, hoping to bag the first deer of the season. And with so many people headed out to the woods, Ed figured the town would be virtually empty.


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[Assistant] So it was the perfect time to put his plan into motion. Oh.


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[Assistant] After he finished his breakfast around 8am, he loaded a large gas can into his 1947 sedan and he headed into town.


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[Assistant] Stopped at a gas station to fill the can, and from there he headed over to his destination, which was Warden's Hardware and Implement Store.


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[Assistant] Now Wardens had been a playing field institution since the 1890s and in 1957 it was owned and operated by 58 year old Bernice Warden who was, she was the daughter of the original owners.


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[Assistant] Uhm, she would occasionally be assisted by her son, Frank.


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[Assistant] Because Bernice herself had expanded the business so much. Hell yeaah. That she needed help running the place because she was such a badass business lady. Love that. Uhm, and like, Bernice was a badass all around. She was a business beast. Like I said, expanded the whole business, needed actually extra help, and she was a loving grandmother. Awww.


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[Assistant] Because like, they can't handle the heat, so like, get out of the kitchen. Exactly. Get out of Bernice's kitchen. She doesn't want you there anyway. She was also an avid fisher. Cool.


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[Assistant] So she's just like a really well rounded lady. Yea, sounds like it. People liked her, she was really well respected, she ran a badass business that everybody needed.


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[Assistant] Also, a little tidbit about Bernice. In 1956, she was the first woman ever to be presented on the front page of the local paper as the Citizen of the Week in Plainfield. Wow. That's really cool.


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[Assistant] Now, like most of the men in the town, Frank had gone hunting that morning, her son. Yea. Leaving Bernice alone to run the store that morning.


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[Assistant] Now Bernice probably wasn't surprised to see Ed Gein walk through the door that morning. In the last several weeks he had been showing up pretty regularly to kind of just like annoy Bernice, essentially.


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[Assistant] And that day, Ed explained he had stopped in to buy some antifreeze. So Bernice filled up the jug Ed had brought with him before taking his money and she wrote up a handwritten receipt, then stuffed the carbon copy into the register.


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[Assistant] I'd like to take a look at the new rifles that you have displayed on the wall. And he was like, I was just thinking today, like I might want to upgrade.


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[Assistant] And he was like, you know, like, can I see this one here? So Bernice handed him a 22 caliber Marlin rifle and he was like, I just want to take a look at it. And she was like, for sure. Yeah, go for it. For sure, Eddie. Like why not? Like everyone called him Eddie. Oh really? Yeah. And he, so she walks away and she just walks over to look out the front store window into the street.


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[Assistant] Yes, such a saint, Augusta. Of course, Bernice had no way of knowing this, uh, and she didn't know that he was right behind her.


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[Assistant] He was aware of certain things that he was doing because later there's a lot of like sanity being called into question and for sure this man is sick. Absolutely. Do not believe he is not sick. That's premeditation.


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[Assistant] There's something very wrong here. Like there's a, there is some premeditation that's happening. Do I fully believe?


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[Assistant] That he needed to be like put away in a, you know, for help in like a hospital later because there was so many layers to his sanity and like, you know, beyond. But these like moments of premeditation are what are very confusing, you know, and what confuse a lot of people about him is like, what are you? A monster. Truly.


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[Assistant] And it's like, how sick are you? How sane are you? Like you really, it's hard to judge. Uh, so like, again, he came back.


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[Assistant] Asked to see this rifle knowing that he had brought the correct bullets. Right. In his pocket for this.


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[Assistant] So she didn't even notice that he had loaded the bullet into the chamber of the Marlin rifle.


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[Assistant] And he had aimed it at the back of her head. Oh my god. So she didn't even get to turn around before he fired the shot right into the back of her head. She's just looking out the window in her own store. No idea that this, she just thinks it's like odd, odd Eddie. Yeah. And she would have no way of like thinking he brought his own ammunition. Why would that ever cross her mind? Why would she ever think that?


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[Assistant] No one heard the sound of the rifle firing inside the store that morning, but across the street at the Phillips 66 station, Bernard Machinsky, I think it is, did see the warden's truck pull out of the garage. The warden's had like a pickup truck for the store.


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[Assistant] Uhm, and that was a little before 9am. He said he couldn't see who was in the driver's seat, but he thought it looked like a man. And it wasn't Frank Warden. Mhm.


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[Assistant] So it seemed a little strange to him that Bernice would have left for the day without turning all the lights off inside the store.


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[Assistant] And so Bernard told Frank Warden all of this later that afternoon when Frank came back from hunting. He was like, I saw some weird stuff.


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[Assistant] Uhm, and Frank was very confused. She was like, what do you mean? Like, what are you talking about? No, she wouldn't have left, like, and that wasn't me.


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[Assistant] So as far as he knew, his mother had intended to keep the store open all afternoon and hadn't mentioned any of these plans to go anywhere to him.


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[Assistant] So he went to grab the keys to the store and then he returned to check on things. As soon as he walked into the hardware store, he knew something was very wrong, obviously.


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[Assistant] The store looked as though it had been partially ransacked. The cash register was missing and there was a large trail of blood leading from behind the counter to the back door.


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[Assistant] He followed the trail to the back door where he discovered that the truck was indeed missing from where it was parked.


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[Assistant] Uhm, very concerned for his mother's safety. Frank called Sheriff Art Schley.


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[Assistant] And reported the scene, and he explained everything that he had found inside the store.


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[Assistant] And so Sheriff Art was still new to the job, so he wasn't really sure what he was going to walk into here. So he called this Chief Deputy Arnie Fritz and the two men rushed over to Warden's store.


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[Assistant] Now while he waited for the sheriff to arrive, Frank looked around the store just to see if he could find anything else. And eventually...


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[Assistant] He saw the receipt that his mother had written after Ed had bought the antifreeze. I wondered if that was gonna come back. Yep. It was all the evidence that he needed to say, Ed did this. Something happened. Ed was lost.


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[Assistant] Now once the sheriff and deputy arrived, Frank showed them the blood and explained his theory. Uh, Ed Gein had been hanging around the store, kind of bugging his mother for the last few weeks, and just one day earlier, he had actually asked whether they sold antifreeze.


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[Assistant] While he was there, apparently Ed casually asked, and this was like a day before, Ed had casually asked Frank whether he planned to go hunting the next morning.


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[Assistant] Which, obviously in hindsight, Frank is like, that's how he was confirming that Bernice was going to be alone that morning. Yep, exactly.


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[Assistant] Although they weren't quite as convinced of Ed's guilt, cause remember, Ed's just like the weird dude. He's the babysitter of the town. Like everybody's just like, I don't know, he's weird, he's shy, like I don't think so. Even when they found all this shit, people were like,


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[Assistant] What? Like that guy? Like he just, cause he was so quiet. Right. And like unassuming, like he wasn't aggressive, he wasn't like...


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[Assistant] So they were like, I don't know about that, but they trusted Frank and their seat did confirm that Ed had been one of the only other people in the store that morning. So they thought it best to go out to the game farm to talk to Ed.


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[Assistant] Now by that evening, a large crowd had gathered downtown and the deputies had rallied a team of local men to help find Gein.


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[Assistant] Uh, cause the large crowd, like they had heard about the disappearance and, you know, this is a small town. Yeah. So.


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[Assistant] Ed wasn't that hard to locate when Officer Dan Chase stopped into Irene Hill's store. Irene Hill is the mother of Bob, the kid who saw the shrunken heads. Yes.


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[Assistant] Um, she told him that Ed was at her house getting ready to drive Bob, her son, down to see what was happening in town. Oh wow. Cause apparently...


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[Assistant] Bob was like a teenager, so he was like, oh, there's like some shit going down downtown, like I want to go see it. And he was like, can you drive me? And he was like, sure. Wow. Yeah.


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[Assistant] Now, accompanied by deputy, and I think his name is Pokey Spies, I'm pretty sure, uh, Chase made his way over to the Hills house and found that Ed was just sitting in his car in the Hills driveway waiting for Bob to come out of the house. So they approached the car and they asked Ed if he could just step out and talk to them for a second.


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[Assistant] In the Hills driveway Chase asked Ed to maybe just provide them a quick little blow-by-blow account of his day up to that point.


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[Assistant] So he explained he'd gone down to Warden's that morning for antifreeze. Then he recounted his movements afterwards, you know, until he arrived at the Hill's house a short time earlier. Seemed like a normal day.


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[Assistant] Uh, when he finished, Chase was like, can you go through that one more time? And that was like a customary thing. It was to confirm whether you're telling the truth, like tell me that same thing over again. So the second account,


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[Assistant] We're a little different. Differed. Yeah. And at least like one or two ways there was some differences. Which is weird. So he said to Ed, now Eddie, you didn't tell the same story come through there that second time. And Ed stared at the two men blankly for a moment and said, somebody frame me.


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[Assistant] And he was like, oh, well, I just heard about the disappearance while I was downtown and I assumed somebody was going to try to pin it on me because I'm like the town weirdo. And they were like, huh.


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[Assistant] Now, still hoping to find Bernie Swardin alive at this point. Uh, Sheriff Schlee and Captain, this is such a hard name to say, Schoeperster, I think it is? Schoeperster.


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[Assistant] Yes, the captain, we'll say. Okay. Uh, they decided to check the Gein farmstead for any evidence of where Bernice might be.


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[Assistant] Like most people in Plainfield and beyond, neither of them had ever been to the Gein Farm, and they were shocked by the state. And this is at night. By the way, they're coming to the Gein


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[Assistant] And there was grime on all the windows, so it kept the moonlight out even. That's really heinous.