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[Assistant] And it was, I mean, out of 511 people, I don't think I've ever seen 50 of them. We always wondered about that, like, did they make that up? What is your tale?


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[Assistant] That one, and that's a pretty new, they built that in like 2008 or 9, maybe even later than that.


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[Assistant] It's, and it's not that big. When you think like a rodeo arena, like it's not- Oh, it's a rodeo arena, that's right. It's not like it's Bridgestone. It holds like maybe 600 people. That's definitely- It's pretty small.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No. In towns? No, I have not. At Heroes Arena? No, no. What if you went back and did one for Heroes? Maybe I should. I'd be the hero of that arena.


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[Assistant] A couple concerts in like Little Rock, but it was not a thing that we like.


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[Assistant] Concerts just weren't a thing that I did when I really grew up, until I got a little older, where I was like,


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[Assistant] I found out it was a thing, really. I mean, our performances were like at churches and- What was the first concert you went to?


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[Assistant] I can't remember, I know that I went to, I listened and I grew up.


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[Assistant] Listened to a lot of like Christian gospel and it was casting crowns was one of the first ones. Arena shows that I saw. And then I did see Rascal Flatts.


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[Assistant] And I thought that was like, I was like, oh my, this is the biggest, that was the perspective I had growing up, like the bands I listened to were like a lot of Christian Rock and like I listened to R.B. and stuff, but I had no perspective, like I thought Reliant Cave was the biggest band in the world.


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[Assistant] And I was like, yeah, they're, they're absolutely massive. And they were big-ish in our world.


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[Assistant] Yeah, well we did this thing called the Fine Arts Festival, which I'm pretty sure that the Jonas Brothers also did. I think I talked to Nick about this. I think that they did it as well, like a long time ago. They grew up, you know, in church. I think their dad was actually maybe an Assembly of God pastor. I know he was a pastor, but I think he was, like my grandpa was a pastor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Churches from all over the country, and so you do this thing, and if you win, you get like a scholarship.


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[Assistant] It's like a big, like a music full ride to go to college kind of thing. And so I'd won it in like 2009, I think. And it was like, I thought it was, there's probably like 10,000 people. And that was like my biggest, that I performed for. And I was like, this is the biggest. That's a pretty big thing. Yeah. Nationally to win.


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[Assistant] Oh wow. There it is. We found it. It would have been in a male solo, or uh, yeaah. Something like that.


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[Assistant] Just that position of being on stage of that being like, I want to do that. You want to be on stage? Yes. I think that's the, probably the main draw at the beginning of just like, I want to be on that side of it. And I feel like it always feels natural. I don't know if it was like this for you too, but it was when you're on stage and maybe it's just like, maybe it's a selfish thing of just like, I like to be on this side of it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And be the person performing, just cause that's my, you know, your personality. But if like there's a, you either know, like when you're on stage, you kind of know, like this is, I'm supposed to be on this side of it.


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[Assistant] Literally three years old, I remember going, this was before we moved across or down the street. And I mean, I say down the street, it's a hundred yards away from that church to the right. There was another like tiny church and there's a, you know what a parsonage is?


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[Assistant] And anyways, I remember going up on stage and I was like three, like have a lot of memories of this going up. My dad would play steel guitar and he played bass and my mom would play piano. So I would just go up like on the stage and I got a guitar that had maybe five strings and it was not tuned and I would sit there with my ear against the


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The guitar, and I'd just be rockin'.


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[Assistant] A good, you know, hour of us thinking, me thinking I was nailing it.


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[Assistant] By the time I was like, you know, four, like we had this thing called the booster band. We'd come up there and I'd go up there. It was just literally before worship started, we got the booster band coming. We'd do songs like father Abraham. You know, father Abraham and many sons and you do the whole, you've been around.


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[Assistant] But that's, that's what I, I would always like performing. Then we started doing like.


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[Assistant] Lived, basically lived with them for a while.


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[Assistant] It was great. He was a big, you know, country music fan.


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[Assistant] Is he really? Yeah, he was, uh, such a super talented guy.


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[Assistant] And it was, uh, yeaah. It was a, that was a whole- T-Bang, Chris Brown was on this tour? Some of the craziest, yeaah, some of the craziest stuff.


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[Assistant] It was awesome. It was great. I just, I had never been outside of like my little world really. And so I was just kind of.


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[Assistant] Atlanta. So you go to Atlanta and you just stay at his house? Yea, I had like an apartment but that's, you know, his studio was there so we'd just be there every single day.


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[Assistant] No, we did some stuff, but it wasn't like, it wasn't a time where he was really touring yet. He was in the beginning when I first, uh, did that when I first met him was on the road and we did that in Memphis. And yeah, it was, uh, I was there for a year and a half or something like that before I started.


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[Assistant] Uh, I started coming to Nashville pretty immediately, but I was coming back and forth like four and a half hours from Nashville and Atlanta, like so broke, so broke when we broke.


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[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, yeah, he took a chance at the beginning and yeah, there's no, no hard feelings.


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[Assistant] I'd love to play this game. Who's Chris Brown?


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[Assistant] It's only about a 10 minute performance, but it's got a lot of content in there. I don't know, I think yea, you'd be me.


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[Assistant] Yeah, you could be Chris Brown and we got T-Pain over here. I'll take it. I used to do that auto tune with my chest. Yeah, it's pretty good. That did sound amazing.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I'd say the national anthem is, is always a, we don't do it.


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[Assistant] And it's not like, I don't, to me, it's, it's not hard for me to sing it, but it is, my greatest fear is like forgetting lyrics. I don't care if we forget one of our songs. I've done that. You know, if you just, the crowd knows them. Yeah. And you're just like, oh, they got it. You can do that.


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[Assistant] But that's the most terrifying song to sing. Because you just expected to know it. Like it's a, it's a thing that, there's no winning by doing the national anthem.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I mean it gets high. Where you screw yourself is if you start it too high.


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[Assistant] It gives you the key or piano note and then three, four, and then you just, you do it off of click after that. But it's.


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[Assistant] It's terrifying because you might forget the words, which like the whole country, it's not like a song that people are like, Oh yeah, I think I've heard that one. Like everyone knows it. It's not like, Oh, I think he said the wrong words, but maybe I was wrong. They know it's wrong.


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[Assistant] There's no winning though. You've seen people, I mean, watch, the only thing that you can watch is like people like the Frey did it one time and just royally screwed it up. And it's amazingly hilarious. I think it was the Frey. If it wasn't the Frey, sorry, the Frey. But it was, I'm pretty sure it was the Frey.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's a tough note to sing. What's the highest note in a song? Like, do you? I mean, that's loaded. What's the highest note in a song? Period. You know how music works?


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[Assistant] Yeaah. I mean, it's one of those things too. It depends on whether I'm like a male or a female. Like, what Houston's gonna sing, like, it's gonna sound different. Like, if I try, if I hit a really high note,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, they did well up there together. But I don't know what the, I, there's some high notes that that could be hit. The craziest stuff is like the whistle notes, whistle tones that like Ariana Grande and Mariah Carey does his whistle. So it's like they'll sing their highest note, like chest voice. And you know what a falsetto is? Like,


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[Assistant] It's not like a full voice, it's like a false set up. Then above that, you can, some people have this head voice that is like a whistle tone.


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[Assistant] It's literally like it's, so it's an octave above your highest note. It's crazy to hear. It's not very enjoyable to me to hear it, but it's up there.


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[Assistant] I have, yeaah, and my, my wife loves it. She likes to go, like, she's, she wanted to be an archaeologist. Like, growing up, that was like her thing. She would go there, and I don't know if it was that specific state park, I'm assuming.


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[Assistant] What's crazy is that you go underneath, there's a whole house under there. Yeah. That's just the, so they're like, ah, we don't want to go in this crappy little house. I'd love to know if someone lived there. They're just like, God, this was a great deal, but hell.


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[Assistant] There's just a guy in there with a, with just a gun in there. He's like, if they find one. He's like, they're going to regret it. Somebody just gets a big haul. Just, there he is. That guy looks like he might be holding some sort of weapon there on the left.


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[Assistant] I would do it for $500, I'd be stoked. But it seems like people commit their entire lives. That's what I never get about like the, the treasure hunting shows. Where it's like, if you're, when I hear about treasure, it's like, you better be getting millions of dollars because they're spending a lot of money to be there. And then they find like this gold and it's like, yeah.


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[Assistant] We're gonna be able to make it to the next season because we found this gold.


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[Assistant] But you've also been, you've also spent a hundred to get here this year. And it's, yeah. Why didn't you save the hundred? Yeah. For the most part, even like the big ones, they just find, yeah, you could have just not. You like this guy, don't you? Sorry. Yeah.


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[Assistant] Darren McFadden was, yea, that was like incredible. Darren McFadden was like the great, he was a hero. But I honestly follow a lot of basketball. The what? The game they lost to Tennessee.


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[Assistant] Matt Jones and Darren McFadden. Matt Jones actually bought, like, this was like the big claim to fame to Natural Damn at the time. Like he bought property. He never went there, but he bought like 200 acres. Oh wow. Like coming into Natural Damn and I don't think he ever went there. And it wasn't like he never built a house or anything. And it also 200 acres there is like, at that time it was like $30,000.


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[Assistant] That might explain why I have a real issue. Yeaah, that's how John Daly got made.


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[Assistant] Just cheese dip and beer. Yeah, it was some factor somewhere like, you've heard of beer cheese? Yeah. Here's the first one.


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[Assistant] John Daly, the most- Another famous Arkansian. He's in- He's in- He's in- John Daly-


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[Assistant] Before I got obsessed with golf, and it wasn't just because he was from Arkansas, I knew who John Daly was and who Tiger Woods was.


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[Assistant] Obviously knew who Tiger was, but that was, I didn't know Phil Mickelson going, I feel like Phil Mickelson has become more famous than the last.


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[Assistant] Yeaah. Three or four years. Yeaah. He really had a resurgent, cause people almost, they got to know his like comedian. You know Justin Thomas?


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[Assistant] But that, that's, yeah, if you saw, you also think about recognize, like,


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[Assistant] That's one, there's no guessing of like, there might be another guy who looks exactly like him. Like no, that's, Phil Mickelson, he had to be a guy.


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[Assistant] If you saw on the golf course, if you see John Daly on a golf course, you're going to know it's him from a couple holes away. You're going to know.


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[Assistant] I mean, I would guess Sweet Team has nothing on it. Uhm, let me think.


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[Assistant] Uh, that's, we have a guy, we have one of those. His name's just Barry though. Yes.


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[Assistant] Really? Yeah. Well that's, we did have a, we did have a guy, he's probably not listening to this podcast, so I can, I can talk about him. He is, there was a guy that, it was in our town, that was like, he was, he was just in the woods, like, it was kind of scary, like it was a, he went to jail a few times. Oh yeah.


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[Assistant] And we're all like, maybe we should trust this guy. Yeah. And it was, yeah, he went to jail. But anyways, that was Barry and he was very, a strong guy. Might have been him.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I got a lot of them. I could do this all day long. Yeah. So, you know, you can have a soft approach where you just have music and then you just say, hey, that was one of the ideas.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's like the, the policeman who's the, the Mexican guy. He's just like, have a good time. You remember that one? It was like a, yeah, that was the best.


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[Assistant] Uh, so seems like a good time. I went to Disney World as a pesticide salesman. I went with a bunch of pesticide salesmen. We were all, we were all real fat, drinking a lot and eating fried stuff. And I tried to feed some pigeons and then they just kept coming.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yea, well, no, I wasn't selling pesticides to, to, uh, we were on, it was like a sales trip.


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[Assistant] Oh yeah, the weed killer ride would be, we'd stop. That was our product, I think. We'd stop. We'd stop. We had bug stop. We had, you know, we had a products. We were competition for roundup, right? But our stuff was called weed and grass killer.


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[Assistant] I don't know, I quit, but I think they're doing fine. I think they're doing about as well as they always were. Once at a sales meeting, I had a boss go up and go, he goes, who's got it better than us? And then everybody went, nobody. And I was like, I don't know that that's true.


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[Assistant] I wasn't prepped on this. I didn't know this chant, but I'm pretty sure all of the competition has it better than us.


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[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, exactly like that. That's what we would get in a room and they would go, uhm, hey, this year we got a new, uh, space for a wasp and hornet killer on the shelf. And then everybody would applaud.


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[Assistant] And then my last year there, I figured out I kind of got the rhythm of the applause break. So I would start starting them. Oh, this seems like a good one. And then I kept a tally hundreds of applause breaks that you would do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, I knew I was quitting every sales meeting. I was like, this is going to be my last one.


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[Assistant] Eventually it was, but I landed, you know, on a retail they have, uh, each item has a skew number is what they call it, right? And I landed, uh, in, in Orlando, got on the shuttle. Another guy was there and he goes, Hey, what's your top five skews? And I was like, okay, dude, let's, uh,


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[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, it's exciting, you know, when you go from three facings to four, you're like, this is going to be good for me.


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[Assistant] Yeah, like you have like three cans, you know, it's all mapped out. But when you get that fourth one, you're like, oh, this is going to be big. My sales are going to go through the roof here. Yeah. And what's a skew? A skew. It's like, it'll be a number. SKU.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well that's the UPC, but they don't have a SKU number and you just type that in the computer and they go, do you have any more of these in stock? And you go type it in and you're like, oh yeah we do, but who knows where they're at.


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[Assistant] And we would have real fights and it was great. It was a lot of fun. Yeah.


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[Assistant] We had Saint Augustine and Centipede, that's the ones I could tell.


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[Assistant] But, I wasn't that good. I read a lot of the back of the bottles.


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[Assistant] But I used to breathe that in, the stores would have to, uh, they would, a bottle would break and they were like, we need you to take this out of here. So I'd put it in the trunk of my car.


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[Assistant] No, I just was like, I gotta get outta here. And not that I don't like Alabama, it was mainly my town. And not that I don't like my town, but I was like, I gotta get outta here.


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[Assistant] You know what I mean? I'm about to go there next week and do comedy. What town was it? I'm going to Auburn. I grew up in a town called Opelika, right next to Auburn.


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[Assistant] But yeah, I mean, my, my dad's an Alabama fan, my mom's an Auburn fan, they're divorced and they both take it very personal. Like if I say I like Alabama around my mom, it's like, it almost hurts her feelings. So I've just kind of always towed the line, but yeah, I like Alabama.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Whoa. Oh, how good to start Eric. All right. Let's reel it back a little bit.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it does change. The accent gets, gets deeper the further you get down there. Yeah.


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[Assistant] You grew up in a trailer park? Yeah, well my parents divorced, my mom moved to a trailer park.


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[Assistant] If you were a kid, big Harlem Globetrotters fan, and you went to the one where the Washington Generals won.


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[Assistant] Right? Like I would be like, you know what? Maybe I will go back to selling pesticides. I said, I get my pants pulled down and losing 16,000.


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[Assistant] But if the Washington generals were like a wrestler bad guy, like they really like taunted them and I feel like the good guy in this scenario is taunting the other people.


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[Assistant] I didn't go to college. Well, we have a similar college story I think. I did community college for about two days.


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[Assistant] I did football one year. That was, yeah. Oh wow. Yeah, one year. Ninth grade. Why? Oh, okay. Eighth grade. Middle school.


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[Assistant] Took my helmet off and was like, I'm glad that's over. I wanted to quit, but my mom, I came out with all my stuff one day after practice. My mom was like, what are you doing? I was like, I'm quitting. She was like, all right, go tell your coach.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I was like, all right. And then I played the rest of the year. I didn't want to tell my, I wanted to walk out, but yeah. And so I just would practice. Were you into sports? Uh, no, no, I just wanted to be cheered for at the pep rally. I thought this is fun. I like backyard football. I kind of dominate in the trailer park. I thought this would be great, but not the same.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's how football was for me. They wanted us to line up 10 years, 10 yards apart and then run at each other and hit. And I was like, Oh, I don't like this. I don't know why we're doing this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was, I was number three and my brother-in-law would wear his Dale Earnhardt hat when he would come to the games. That's how he would support me. Right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, she's like 10 years older than her. Oh. Yeah, we got different dads. We got a whole thing. We got a, we got quite the family tree going. Yeah.


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[Assistant] I got another sister that was born when I graduated high school. Wow. And she's not related to my other sisters.


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[Assistant] You know, I got, uh, and when I was at, when I was playing football, I got stabbed by a girl with a pencil in, uh, in school. She stabbed me several times in the corner and, uh, she, I never saw her again. And, uh, but I got to miss a day of football practice and that was a lot of fun.


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[Assistant] People think I make up stuff all the time. I'm like, no, I was living in it. I mean, I had a great time.


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[Assistant] Do the whole swimming and creeks thing. And you know, that's why, that's why I love country. Every country's on, I'm like, I know what that's about. Even if I haven't had the experience, country takes me there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's getting fancy around here though. I went to do a gig at a hotel downtown Nashville and I have my hat on and the lady was like, uh, excuse me, we don't allow ball caps in here. And I'm like, well, this is a trucker hat. So I don't even play ball.


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[Assistant] I never saw her again. I got one day of in-school suspension because I had pushed her head first. Oh, now we're getting to the bottom of this. Well, she stole something from me. Oh, now we're getting even more. And then I pushed her head and then she stabbed me and then a couple other dudes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I got in the arm and twice in the back. Cause I was, cause I was like, ah, you know, I was pinned up.


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[Assistant] It was great. I always say that the worst thing was like the address, you know, because I'm like, everybody's got a normal address and I'm like lot eight Morris trailer park that I have to write down. So everybody knows, but living there was great, you know, except for any kind of storm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's not just tornadoes, it's like every storm you're like, this could, this could take. This is it. Did y'all get hit with anything? We got, we had an ice storm once. It froze a tree limb and it fell and stabbed through the roof.


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[Assistant] Yeah. I think community is very, I like it. Yeah. My sister and her husband moved to the trailer next to us. So we had two trailers. We had a little courtyard out there, a bunch of kids, not really related to us. Like, you know, my brother-in-law's got a, you know, got two kids from a previous marriage and it was kids all over the place.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was probably 15. And it was like a row of trailers and then a dirt road and then like the backyard of people's regular houses. So their backyard was like looking at the trailer park.


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[Assistant] Uh, now we have the Kia plant pretty close to where I live. So we got, you know, that, but, uh, the Hyundai plant in Montgomery was big when that opened up. Yeah. I think they were lay ocean and, uh, yeah, we had a great time. We used to play football at the bus stop. We'd be all sweaty getting on the bus.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Opelika is a Native American term for great swamp and there is no swamps there.


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[Assistant] Yeah. Lee County, Chambers County, where I grew up is like the last area of the Creek Indians. And my dad bought some land once plowed it up. We found arrowheads everywhere. Oh, that's good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, I want more questions though. Do you got any other questions?


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[Assistant] Oh, NASA. Oh, oh yeah. Maybe so we'll say that or maybe, uh, that's what we want it to be, but I don't think that's what it is. I'm guessing Walmart.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What about the Kia plant? I don't think that's in Alabama though. It's in Georgia. Oh yeah. Okay. I don't know. I have no idea. Logging.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For alcohol and then wheat. Alcohol first and then they found wheat.


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[Assistant] Well, that's military stuff. I don't want to get locked up in some weird military thing. They're like, what are you up to? And then they search my YouTube history and I'm like, okay, you know what I'm doing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So she got hit by a meteorite and lived.


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[Assistant] My friend almost got cut up by his own uncle for parkin' in his driveway. Oh really? They were neighbors, it was a, yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There is such thing as, uh, mineral rights, where somebody can own underneath.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, like if they find something in there, somebody else can own it.


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[Assistant] Like if you buy land, cause I just bought some land, if you buy land and somebody has like inherited something, they can have mineral rights to your land.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wow. And then they could take it. Yeah. And you think you're rich, but really now you just. I just watched.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and there may be, I think in Tennessee, it's illegal to capture rainwater because the government's like, well, we own the rain. That rain is ours. Are you serious? I think so. I don't know for sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This sounds like a thing from Joe Dirt. This is, you know.


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[Assistant] I just don't believe that it comes through the house unless it's a trailer and doesn't kill her.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, that's what they always say. Yeah, I've heard that. If a tornado comes, you know, you live in a trailer park, they're like, go, go to a neighbor's house or go outside and lay down in a ditch.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wow. Oh, I remember that in 93. We had a little, we had a little snow.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I was 11 and we built a snowman. It was the best time of my life. It was the greatest time.


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[Assistant] I like the idea that your dad would be waiting for you to European.


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[Assistant] He's won seven now, I think, right? Yea, 17. Yea, he's won above Bear Bryant, I think now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You can, you can say that. I mean, I dig it though. Alabama was like, nah, we, we have quite a few. We're going to pick that from my whole challenge.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, they have a, they had a name for, for Bill Elliot, I forget, like a nickname, something.


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[Assistant] Oh yeah. Yeah. I've been there a couple of times. There's no gamble. You're not allowed to gamble in Alabama. There's no lottery, but victory land somehow exists in shorter Alabama, the dog track.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Been there a couple of times. There's a guy, a couple of stories about this guy named Butch. He just kind of hangs out there, bad teeth, mustache, suspenders, and he just, he's just hanging around and when new people come, he helps them pick horses or dogs and then


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, when they win, he wants his cut and you know, 10%, but apparently he lives.


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[Assistant] At a hotel, I met this guy one time and then I thought that that was just a random occurrence and then another friend was telling me about the same guy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But he lives in a hotel apparently right there and he just hangs out there all day. The first time I went I had Vegas in mind of this like, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like horse racing. And I thought this is going to be great. And it is just a sad bunch of people in victory land. It does not feel much like victory. And then there was a casino and then with slot machines and then it got shut down.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But they had bill, it wasn't like they were hiding it, they were billboards on the highway. Like I won big at victory land. I remember that.


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[Assistant] Yeah, Brian was up there not doing well and I thought, well, I'll get it though. And I did not. And they, they left.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. At that point, it was just a point of pride. How much time did you do? I was supposed to do 30. I probably did 25. Yeah.


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[Assistant] Like a plastic sign that looked like bricks. Held up by some PCP pipes.


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[Assistant] There was a, a pool place called Auburn Splash where you go buy pool products. And I remember that guy had a pretty good joke one time. I was in there with my dad and he was like, people call me all the time, go, how much it costs to get in? He's like, nothing to get in only when you leave with stuff, right?


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[Assistant] Yeah, if you get to 43, you're kind of like, actually, how many malls are there?


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[Assistant] So. I get it. Yeah. I don't either. Now I don't get it. I don't like it either. Yeah. I'll do a little guardians of the galaxy here, but I don't believe what's happening.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] With the band though, huh? Yeah, with the, with two of the members. One of the guys is not doing well, but, uh, but yeah. Yeah, I think so. Yeah. But it was great. I mean, I went out in the audience to watch and then a lady was like, Hey, you ever, you know how to milk cows? And I was like, no. And she's like, she was shocked.


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[Assistant] Are we counting slugs you think maybe? I thought they were the same. Slug just kind of feels like a snail without a shell.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, we used to, cause you could put salt on slugs and kill them. And I used to go out there all the time and put all this salt on them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they were like, well, yeah, I don't know when that was. They're like, I'm from ARAD and they're like, wow, that doesn't exist.


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[Assistant] I'll be your huckleberry. That's what they always said. Huckleberry Finn. I don't know why we thought that was so cool that he would say that, but I, but I did it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, Opelika is a railroad town and they said that it was so bad back in the day that when the train would come through, they would instruct people to duck down in the plane because people in downtown Opelika would shoot at the train.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it's a good move not to do stand up at the school though.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wouldn't want to do stand up at my own school.


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[Assistant] You know, they say now, who knows, right? I'm no, I'm no barn doctor, but the, they say diet diet coke keeps you from losing weight. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, there's something in there that doesn't, doesn't let you lose weight.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know if that's true. But yea, it's like aspartame, there's some weird stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right. He's been battling a non COVID related health issue for a while now, and then he had to have emergency surgery recently. So he's recovering from that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just love the idea that I go, I'll check out that guy's podcast, I just, wait.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I've lost a little bit of weight. Yeah. I don't think the gal had anything to do with it, but.


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[Assistant] And grab it. We used to run a play called the Auburn special was when I was real young playing football where we put the running back at left guard.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And just hand it and do a reverse to the left guard. Like the most illegal play of all time.


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[Assistant] Uhm, but it would happen so fast, I don't think we ever got caught. Yeah. But you just, you can just cheat like that when you're, when you're that, when you're that young.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Quarterback would take it and just hand it to the left guard right there. And then he would run. Yeah. Which you're not allowed to do. Yeah. Uh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Never got caught cause you never think that you're handing it off to the lineman, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The running back and the left guard switch positions for that play. So we huddle up and then the left guard would be in the backfield and the running back would be on the line. You just never think to look for that. Was the ref on the phone dude?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When you're six and seven and eight, like there's not much of a physical difference between.


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[Assistant] Those kids, you know, so it's not like you notice huge fat guy in the backfield. They're just two kids.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's a hundred percent illegal. Yeah. I remember coach being like, you know, if we get caught, we get caught, but let's just keep doing it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You get a big, a big gain. Yeah. Cause you just never think to look, that's where the, you know, that's where it's coming from.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Have you ever seen those plays, like, where you do, like, uh,


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's just, all that's just gamesmanship, I think. I think that should be encouraged.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's me just walk around. Hey, how are you trying to fist bump people? Yeah.


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[Assistant] What do y'all think the highest level of profession you could masquerade as is?


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[Assistant] You think you could like show up in court one day and be a lawyer and pull it off, you think?


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[Assistant] I feel like I'm missing a letter. Is that all of them? Let's say they called you tomorrow and they're like, we're going to bring you on the program as a financial expert. And you have like a day to, to get that character together. You think you could pull it off convincingly? If I knew enough.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They can, a heart attack is awesome. Yeah.


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[Assistant] You've seen these services where you can like buy a star. Yeah. That's how I feel. That's why is that allowed? I don't know, I own five of them, so I hope it's the real deal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] By the way, it's $20 to $100 to name a star, which I guess makes sense. We have a lot of them, like billions.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] April 7th, I'm doing a show in Lexington. If we have some fans in Lexington, Kentucky.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like to already be like, you got to murder. I think you called me and I was waking up and you're like, I've already done a show and killed.


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[Assistant] You know, country, I got into country music early on, that's when it just blew up. Oh, Garth Brooks. Yeaah. Clint Black, all those guys.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You would have nailed all these classes in Notre Dame.


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[Assistant] I had a speech class in college where I was the only student.


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[Assistant] I think that's the one who emailed us, right? Oh yea, that's one of the, the brothers. One of the brothers, yea. What do you call them? Brothers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh right, you gotta disguise it a little bit. Family name. That's how I got it.


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[Assistant] That's how I say it. I guess it's Jaguars.


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[Assistant] But they said that keep bowl three strikes in a row and then that happened.


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[Assistant] Local comic. There's another word that starts with DW, it's dweeb.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I thought of that after Aaron talked about his friendship class.


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[Assistant] There was a local guy who just died and he left his dog, five million dollars.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, he has a caretaker and they got five million dollars worth of money to take care of the dog.


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[Assistant] We had, that was actually the first video game. It's called Tennis for Two. We had an Atari, like most things, we got it like a year after everybody else did.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To the point where I remember we went back to school after Christmas break.


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[Assistant] And our teacher made us go around the room and tell everybody like, what'd you get for Christmas? And I was embarrassed to tell it because everybody else got it last Christmas.


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[Assistant] And I like said it under my breath, like the last thing, cause I didn't want people to know that I got it hard. Cause everybody got it late.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Got it very late. And that's, I mean, besides that, I didn't play video games. My freshman year in college, my roommate had a Tecmo Bowl. Tecmo Super Bowl. And I remember if you had Bo Jackson, you could pretty much be unstoppable.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I grew up as I did for my research in the golden age of arcade video games. Okay. From like, uh, late seventies to early eighties. Yeah. And that's when all the big arcades, I mean, arcades just blew up. And I remember like even grocery stores, they all had like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ms. Pacman or something like that, like in the, when you walk in. I remember going to my mom and she'd be shopping. I just want to stay. If I had to, she'd give me a quarter. I'd play it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Even if I didn't have a quarter, I would just watch someone else play. And that was just a normal thing. Just watch people you don't know play it. And it was just, that was Twitch back then. Just him looking back at some guy looking back at you.


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[Assistant] I mean, I'm pretty sure, man. I don't, I thought that was something to my grew up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think you'd find it like a retro, like in a, uh, laundry mat or something. Retro, like video games. Tacoma comedy club. The green room has video games.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, according to the Entertainment Software Association, three-fourths of all US households have at least one person who plays video games.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And by the end of this year, it's projected that 2.7 billion people, about a third of the country, of the world, will play video games.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I did research and there's studies that say it definitely contributes. And then there's another one that'll say, I mean, you can find anything to back your argument. Well, that's true with anything on the internet, but there's just research that shows both things.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah. That's crazy. It's that music they play during the game. They don't have lessons to it. Yeah, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, so the very first video game, you've already kind of accused me of it, and you're right. Tennis for Two. That's what it was called. Like Pong? It's Pong before Pong, basically. This was 1958.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 58? It was just some computer scientist guy that just created it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, there were some before that. There was Bertie the Brain back in 1950. It was a tic-tac-toe where you played against Bertie.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was the first game created solely for entertainment purposes, not academic. They just made it for fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, that's what, that's what is widely considered. Space War came out right after it in 1962. It's the first video game to be installed on multiple computers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You couldn't buy it, but multiple...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, it was at MIT. The guy who invented it was at MIT. I mean, that looks pretty cool. And, uh, this is the game. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What are you doing? The game features two spaceships in a dogfight while maneuvering in the gravity well of a star.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Video game console was the Magnavox Odyssey, 1972.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that one, that's Galaxy Game. That's the other first one. That came out the same time. That's an exhibit at the Computer History Museum. One of them still.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So the first home console where you had multiple games was the Magnavox Odyssey. They had table tennis, ski, Simon Says, analogic hockey, football, cat and mouse. Some fun stuff here. Submarine. Roulette.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I mean they had different cartridges that you put in.


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[Assistant] How much would one of these cost? Uhm, I don't, I don't know how much one of those would cost, but we had different cartridges like Atari's that you put in. If you got too hot, you blow on them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Most people think Pong was like the first video game. It was the first really successful game.


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[Assistant] No, no, no, I think layaway means they put it away, right? Until you can't pay it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know Tracy Lawrence, country singer Tracy Lawrence does a big turkey giveaway every year downtown, but it's with some charity.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think there's a big mafia thing too. I think the boss of the neighborhood, whatever, would give out turkeys to the...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] People at Thanksgiving and they loved it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, so then the golden age of video arcades hits. 1978 Space Invaders comes on. It's the first game where you're regulated by lives instead of a timer or a set score. Interesting. Wow. Uhm, so you can keep going gaining extra lives through, and it was the first game


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is the first one or one of the first ones to track the highest score and keep it on the machine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was the first to include background music during the game played. It was a simple four note loop.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So Asteroids came a year later, 79, 1980, Pac-Man. It was the first video game with power-ups.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know what that is, Nate? Where like if you eat one of the big pellets, you can get more power.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And the individual ghosts react to players actions. Before it was just, no matter what you did, the whoever you're against will do the same thing, but the ghost would actually respond to you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Centipede, Pac-Man, Donkey Kong, Frogger, Ms. Pac-Man, all those came in like a three year period.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pac-Man had a, a pattern. You could actually beat it if you learned the pattern, but Ms. Pac-Man didn't. Cause the ghosts were due semi-random.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then, uh, 1983, the Crash game, video game crash, because there was too many being put out, low quality games.


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[Assistant] They were just putting out so many that people stopped buying them and lost interest in video games.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It came out with Super Mario Brothers and Legend of Zelda.


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[Assistant] Yeah, like I haven't played video games in 20 something years and on your bus we were playing like Call of Duty.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, so when I was a kid, I would play new games and I would know, like then I'd get my parents to play with me and they couldn't figure stuff out. And it'd be new to me too, but I just knew the concept.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And Tetris became one of the best selling games of all time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's a thing called the Tetris Effect. You guys heard of this? It's when you start playing, play it so much you start having thoughts, mental images, and dreams.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] About Tetris, like you'll see a bunch of boxes and you'll start thinking about how to line them up in a super certain way, like on a supermarket shelf.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it like enters your thoughts and you start seeing images of falling pieces.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think there's an episode in the office where the white collar guys try to stack the boxes and they don't know how to do it right. There's a special skill to it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It studies to show, do you play it after a traumatic event? It blocks some of the recurring, recurrent intrusive memories that people are often left with.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And if you play three minutes of Tetris, it can reduce cravings from food, cigarettes, and alcohol.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Caleb sent me some of that and he's on Aaron land, so gotta be true.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's also something called game transfer phenomena when people get really out of hand and they start seeing power bars over people's heads. That's when they've just lost it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So the 90s, that's when the violent games came on. Street Fighter II came out in 91, Mortal Kombat 92.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's when the rating system came for video games, because of that stuff, the Video Game Rating Council. So now they started giving things T for teens, and InfoMature. And that's when movies started coming out. The mid-90s, there was a Street Fighter movie, Mortal Kombat, Super Mario Bros.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm sorry. Alright, now we're in the mid nineties. Resident Evil. Oh yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The Resident Evil franchise sparked the revival of the zombie genre.


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[Assistant] Alright, now we're to 2000. PlayStation 2 comes out. It becomes the best selling game console of all time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, so 2001 is the Xbox came out. It was unveiled by Bill Gates and the Rock, a consumer trade show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I was kinda surprised. What was it, 2000? 2001. Slightly delayed for its release because of 9-11. Came out in November 2001.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, that wasn't this one, but they had carjacking, murder, and prostitution, and they got blasted because it was right after 9-11 and people just didn't think it was good taste. Did you find it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, 2005 is when Guitar Hero comes out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was from Wikipedia, so I'll have to go check the reference.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, 2006, Nintendo Wii came on the scene. Yep. First time to do that. Sold for $250.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Chad Rodden used to have a joke, couldn't afford it. We don't call it Nintendo we, we call it Nintendo they, cause we can't afford it. That's a great joke. Yeah. Um, it helped people in nursing homes, helped people get enough to get exercise, but then it became injuries known as weeitis, wee knee, and wee elbow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Retirement community and nursing home are two different things.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, 2008 Grand Theft Auto IV became another big problem.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So mothers against drug driving, uh, petition to have the game's rating changed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The next year Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2, another big problem, the no Russian, uh, part of the game where you're CIA operative and undercover a terrorist organization and you're required to carry out a mass shooting at Moscow airport. I played that one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, also 2009, Angry Birds and Farmville. Came to the two big, huge games playing on the phone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Tom magazine called Farmville one of the 50 worst inventions of the decade.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Did you find out of 20% of kids in the UK?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey, I defended hedge fund managers. Everybody just attacks them. We don't know what they did.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, but this will counter it. Uh, 2011 Minecraft is released. Becomes the best selling video game of all time with 200 million units sold. The Guardian, which is a UK publication.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Classified Minecraft is the best video game of the 21st century. I mean, we're kinda early here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And Forbes gave Minecraft a special mention that lists the best video games of the 2010s.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Legends of Zelda? I mentioned it on the Nintendo.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In 2013, Grand Theft Auto V comes out. It becomes the second best selling game of all time. But more controversy because it's a depiction of women.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's a mission that requires you to use torture equipment in a hostage interrogation.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Lindsay Lohan sues them because they say a character is based on her likeness. But he got dismissed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 2016 Pokemon Go becomes a big thing. It was April Fool's joke and became a worldwide phenomenon.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I was with you on that. Yeah, there was just girls walking around in like a little shopping area. Did you do it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 2017 Fortnite comes on the scene. Yeah, Fortnite's... I got some crazy stuff here about it. Oh, really? I mean, it's just how big it is. Netflix CEO told shareholders in his estimation, the biggest threat to Netflix continued dominance entertainment was Fortnite. Fortnite's Battle Royale became a cultural phenomenon. It was in 2018. Ninja.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Played along with Drake, Travis Scott, Kim Dotcom, and Juju Smith Schuster. And it broke viewership records for Twitch. And how many? Uhm, I don't, I don't, I don't have it on here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So Twitch, I'll just ignore that, Twitch, uhm, became a thing in the mid 2010s, uhm, and, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Twitch streams have more traffic now than HBO's online service. In 2015, YouTube launched YouTube Gaming.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Same topic concept. And now PlayStation 4 and Xbox One kind of have something similar where you can do it. Which led to the big start of eSports.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 100 million people watch for how long or is that just coming and going? Can people hear you?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I was just curious, like the Super Bowl lasts roughly three or four hours. So in fairness, is League of Legends like days where you could tune in or tune out and it still counts as a viewer?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] People tuning in, tuning out. Esports has become so big that the 2024 Summer Olympics in Paris were discussing making it a sport.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They eventually decided that they're not going to, it's premature to make it a metal event.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sorry, I don't have perfect dialect, like some people here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I'm not sure. I just, I say a lot of things wrong.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's weird. That's very funny. Uh, the greatest gamers of all time. And again, I just looked at this. I don't know. Faker?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is by most accounts, I'm looking over at you Caleb. The best League of Legends player of all time?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's one of only two people to win the League of Legends three times. He's the only esport player to grace the cover of ESPN's magazine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ninja is the highest earner, earning gamer. He's got a bunch of endorsements. Adidas, Red Bull, stuff like that. Celebritynetwork.com said he's worth 15 million, but it's probably more than that because Microsoft tried to, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was trying to get in 20 to 30 million to leave Twitch and join Mixer, their streaming platform.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't think he did. Oh, he did. He did. He's with Mixer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The human fun. Yeah, it's the human fun. Money for people. Uh, alright, so we talk about the future of, of video games now. VR.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The headset, they say it's too big, it weighs over a pound.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It has to be strapped tightly on your face and people like to play with friends.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And after a half hour of wearing it, you get sweaty and your energy is zapped.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So they're trying to come up with more social ways to do VR.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So they're trying to make VR more social, hyper-reality. It's kind of like a escape game where you go to like a warehouse and you play with VR.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But the objects in the room are real, so like when you reach for something with VR, there'll actually be something there that feels like that object.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And the other thing I say is gonna really change is mobile games because of 5G.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 5G is going to allow games to be so much more complex on your phone. Cause I guess right now it's some, if it gets too complex, they get slowed down. But 5G will allow much more complex games.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's a campaign mode? Like it's the storyline. Single player.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So the other thing I read about future video games is AI will become a bigger thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But they're like concerned if he gets too complex.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It won't be fun because the computer will just do dumb stuff like, like if you're playing a game where you're hunting each other, it'll just hide forever. Like, you know, and whereas


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because it'll just like, my best strategy is just literally hide for 48 hours until he gives up. So you can't have it too complex or it'll just do stuff that's not fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, so there's two Hall of Fames, World Video Hall of Fame. We're about done, right? Yeah. Okay. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They get it. There's two Hall of Fames. The World Video Hall of Fame, which opened in 2015 in Rochester, New York. Home of the Garbage Pal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, first year inductees in 2015, the very first six that went in were Doom, Pac-Man, Pong, Super Mario Brothers, Tetris, and World of Warcraft.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, and then there's an international video game hall of fame in Atumba, oops, Antumbwa, Iowa. Oh, the birthplace of magic.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] As the city was home to the Twin Galaxies arcade, which became the epicenter for numerous competitions and arcade games.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright. So, uh, eSports greatest moments. The number one was the one you pointed out during the Clutch performances. Mhm. That Street Fighter 3.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I went on the worst video game of all time. It's widely considered ET the extraterrestrial.


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[Assistant] It was based on the 1982 movie, but they quickly coded it in five weeks to get it out by Christmas.


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[Assistant] It sold only a hundred million and a half copies, nowhere near the expectations.


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[Assistant] And the urban legend is a large number of the cartridges were sent back to the company and buried in a landfill in New Mexico after they failed to sell. It's, it is crazy. What is the point of it?


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[Assistant] I think you gotta get him home somehow. Oh, I remember this game and I loved it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You aren't, you did, you. I really do remember this. I don't know if I played it, but I do remember this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like that the ad is another chair though. They're like, you looking for a chair? Are you looking for a big chair?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I went to the driving range this week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I went, you know, I go down to like to the end, away from everybody else, just to kind of be left alone. And most people just will leave you, they won't pay attention.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yes, yes, my back to everybody so they can't see me and I can't see them.


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[Assistant] Now I didn't go to the very end, but I was the farthest down at the time.


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[Assistant] I know what she's doing. Her husband is still back there getting the balls. So she's just waiting. So she's just staring straight the direction toward me. And I'm trying to ignore her and just kind of do my own thing. And I hit one like a definite like 12 feet.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I'm like, and I'm just looking like, you know, watching like, and then I just hear a voice say, I know that feeling.


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[Assistant] And they're not good. My wife said, well, that should make you feel better that at least she was terrible. I was like, no, it makes me feel worse because she thinks we're the same. She was saying that to make me feel good. Like, Hey man, we've all been there.


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[Assistant] Yeah, she went on, I left that part out because it would have really confused you, but she explained every professor with the different levels.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but adjunct professors, someone that's not salaried by the university, they're paid per class.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I have a friend who's adjunct professor at Vanderbilt. He teaches a business class. And he's.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I do it, uh, every day. I'm glad you talked to him, Eric. Yeah, absolutely. Good job, Eric.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There was just a case locally where someone got carjacked and the baby was in the backseat.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You both say it the same way. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I don't like chives either. They put it on baked potato. Yeah. A lot of stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm hoping there's a change. It's a good segway to our topic because this guy had a job. Chive placer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would be the worst at sales. I've never done it. Cause I know I'd be bad at it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My first job in high school, I've had jobs that aren't odd. They're odd to think I did them. I worked at a trucking company. I worked for tobacco farmers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, just every level of tobacco from planting it to cutting it to harvesting it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I grew up in the country and my summer, like in the summer of college is, you know, I would just help these farmers out doing tobacco.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The setting part's fun. First you set the tobacco plants and that's kind of fun. You sit on the back of a tractor and they have this and you just sit back there and you and a buddy and this wheel goes around. You take turns planning.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The, put it in this wheel and the wheel puts it in the ground. It's kind of fun. You just get back there and hang out and talk and do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, yeah. These are guys I knew growing up. Yeah. Yeah. I got fired from my first job. Really? Trucking company. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, well, I wasn't fit out, fit for blue collar. The blue collar world. Trucking company. Uhm, I mean, my job was to watch this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They had me move one of the trucks, one of the 18 wheelers, and, uh, that's not easy when you don't know what you're doing. Back to then, and I hit like a bus. And, I mean, I wasn't a good employee anyway, probably, and I think this was just a way for them to fire me. How old were you at this point? I was in high school.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A buddy of mine, my best friend got me on there, working there and I was making like $3.75 an hour or something like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But then they didn't fire me that day, but the next day I came in and the guy called me in his office and I had to go in early, like at 6 a.m. and he called me in his office and he fired me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To have to tell my parents I got fired from my first job.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Actually, uhm, I've never smoked or dipped in my life, but I did get nicotine poisoning from working in tobacco.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, we were, uh, when the cutting the tobacco one time and it rained a lot and the leaves were really, really wet and we'd worked out in the field all day. And we got done. We went home or surprised me and the guys were doing with, and we're going to go out that night. And I just started feeling sick. I was like, Oh my God. I started throwing up and then.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I called one of them and said, Hey man, I'm not going to make it. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm sick or something. He's like, we're all sick and it affected all of us. Somehow it got in our.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What are some other odd jobs stuff that you've looked up? Uhm, online dating ghost rider? $24 an hour for this. So...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm sure you've never done online dating. No. No, I never have. Well, I'm a professional online dater. No more, but I was.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, success story, I don't know if it's rare, but you think most of them don't work out?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I have that joke. I mean, I've been on social, on those dating sites since the beginning. My username on eHarmony is just Brian. Is it? Just because I was the first one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I think so. I just remember when the dot com boom just took off and just, do you remember that? Just everything's just like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, well, we can go back to that. But basically, if you ever online date, all the profiles look


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Very similar. They all kind of say the same thing. They're trying, you're trying to say things that you think the person wants to hear.


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[Assistant] And then, but there's, there's writers that will.


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[Assistant] I mean, I still go back occasionally. Yeah. Well again, just check, see what's going on there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I remember like they said list three things you're looking for in your mate.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I put someone, uh, who accepts me, accepts me for me, someone who is, you know, that's not superficial or something like that. Someone with big boobs. Stuff like that. Yeah. Just for fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Computer hackers make $100,000 a year. Companies hire computer hackers to legally break into their network to find weaknesses to help prevent real hackers from getting in.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This woman in professional handwell says she wants to make $13,000 for two hours of work.


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[Assistant] I don't know if she's crazy, but she does wear gloves and she says she got on the subway once and a lady with a ring cut her hand and she couldn't work for a couple of weeks. She used to wear gloves all the time.


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[Assistant] They're looking for long straight fingers with no lumpy knuckles, lines, or scars. And even skin tone.


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[Assistant] Focus group participants, they make between $50 and $400 to be a focus group.


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[Assistant] What's the difference between plasma and blood? I don't know. I have no idea what it is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was 40 moved up to 50 and now recently it's back down to 45.


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[Assistant] Yep. I just had my first colonoscopy. It was fun. Uhm, snake milker.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anti-venom. Yes. The Kentucky reptile zoo sells the stuff to people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just livin' life, man. Just livin' life. By the time you hit your 40s, you'll see it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Someone who does odor tests to test the effectiveness of hygiene products like soap and body wash, deodorant and mouth washes. So they literally smell people's armpits, their feet, and their breath. Just to rate the odor on a scale of 1 to 10.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, this woman smelled 5,600 feet in her 15 year career as an odor tester.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I don't know about feet. Yeah, but soap, body wash, deodorant, mouthwash.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But there's also armpit testers. They gotta find people who were willing to raise their armpit and let you smell them. How much they make? $65 a week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wanna guess what this is? No, I mean, I'm out on guessing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, it's these mass poultry production places where they just pump out thousands of chickens. They need someone that can determine whether it's a male or female.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It may, it's a real thing. It's, uh, cause hens, female chickens, lay eggs and males they use for meat. So they have to have somebody at these mass poultry production places to merely determine the females over here, the males over here. And when they're first born, it's not easy to determine. Yeah. So this is a full-time job, 60,000 a year, just determine if it's a male or female chicken. Wow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ranging out with those guys. Just from hanging out with fat dudes.


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[Assistant] If I wasn't here, it would just, it would just go.


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[Assistant] Well, do you guys remember the first comedy special that you ever saw?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, that's not the one I'm thinking about. There was one he shot maybe in Jamaica or something outside, uh. I don't know.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, you feel good, like, I thought the final, I thought it looked great.


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[Assistant] Yeah, you refined it obviously and added some stuff, but the bulk of it you had before the pandemic hit, you were ready.


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[Assistant] You know, it'll be very memorable from years to come because it was outside. People were wearing masks, the helicopter flying over.


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[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's your first special? Do you remember?


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[Assistant] I don't, I don't, I know I'm not gonna be that good when they'll notice me, I just don't want to be so bad.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was, which I know doesn't quite fit my comedy, but my parents wouldn't let me watch, you know, we didn't have cable and they weren't going to whatever. So when I was in high school, Eddie Murphy, we all came out and I was in high school and my friends rented it at the video store and we watched it.


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[Assistant] Yeah, so Eddie Murphy Rawl, which I read is the top grossing stand-up comedy special of all time.


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[Assistant] It's mostly, I looked at the top 10, uh, the top 8 are black comics. Black comics do it, Stum. The Kings of Comedy did it. Kevin Hart's done it. Martin Lawrence has had a couple that have done really well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was about to get to that. It set the record for the use of the F word 223 times until Sticks and Stones broke it.


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[Assistant] I blew that joke. Uh, Richard Pryor you asked about, so I looked at a couple of the rankings of like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, is number one, and then Vulturehead, Richard Pryor live on the Sunset Strip.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, the first one, that's the first one released in a movie theater. First full length stand-up set.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A video, it was, uh, Richard, Richard Klein, 1975, HBO. Wow. Not Robert Klein? I'm sorry.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Robert Klein, I'm bombing his. Yeah. Robert Klein. Robert Klein.


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[Assistant] Robert Klein did it. It was the first ever hour long special and he said it was the first time he got to present an act and not have to be in a hurry.


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[Assistant] Uhm, you remember when, uh, you were first considering doing, uh, the special and where to put the platform and you're like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, that weekend that the stand-ups came out, we were in Tacoma and immediately you saw a difference in


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When you put out full-time magic, did you still keep doing those jokes in the clubs?


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[Assistant] Uhm, so I looked up the first comedy special, stand-up special on Netflix. You guys wanna guess?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now when I look up on Wikipedia just a list of all the, they have every Netflix special that came out in the year and everything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well according to Wikipedia, the first, uh, Netflix special was Russell Peters in October of 2013 and then Aziz Ansari did one like a few weeks later. But then none in 2014. I don't know why. And then...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Didn't you do like a meeting with executives at Netflix and you were using my password?


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[Assistant] We just watched, uh, Cobra Kai. It's not a multi-cam, but it's very good, you know, fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yes, the first season was on YouTube Red, and then it went to Netflix, but there's a scene, have you seen it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Where the students, there's a nerdy kid and another kid and they're trying to work together to move this big rock and the nerdy kid says, what we need is a fulcrum.


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[Assistant] Yeaah, I mean I loved Karate Kid. If I didn't love Karate Kid, I don't know that I would.


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[Assistant] I like the shows that, and they're starting to go back to more of this, I think where they release them once a week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, like the Mandalorian and things like that. And I was trying to think of some other ones.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Uh, I was trying to think of some like unusual standup specials that people took a different. Well, yeah, I know Drew Michaels.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maria Banford's done some fun ones, even before COVID.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, she's, she's great. So some of the, real quick, just some of the other top specials that both of these mention, both of them had, uh, Chris Rock Bring the Pain as the number two.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Delirious, both of them have that as the number five best special all time. He was 22 when he did that. Think how crazy that is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, there's a lot of style for me. So just real fast, some of these, uh, Louis CK Shameless.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was his big coming out. I mean, he'd been around for a while, but that was more


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Uhm, Robin Williams evening at the Met, Bill Cosby himself. That's the dentist joke that's so famous.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, uh, Dave Chappelle killing them softly. And then some recent ones that, uh, now this, this was from 2015. So Tennessee kid.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's probably would have been on here if it wasn't for that. Uh, Kevin Hart, let me explain. That took him from a star to a worldwide superstar, they said. And, uh, Patrice O'Neil, elephant in the room.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which was originally on Comedy Central, it was 42 minutes because of commercials, but then they re-released it on Netflix and it's 77 minutes. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's up everybody? Hello, hello folks. I've been saying what's up everybody. Uh, welcome to Nate land. We are glad you're here. Uh, right before we get started, I do want to acknowledge we do obviously realize that, uh, the world is crazy and a lot of stuff is going on. Uh, and


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Look, as I always said with this podcast, uh, we are here to be a distraction. If you need a distraction, I think you do need it at some times. I think if you're just watching the news all day long.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You can drive yourself crazy and if you need a break, our job is to be that break. So of course we realize stuff is going on. Uh, but that's not what we're here to do. And, uh, we, the way I've looked at us.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're like the band that plays on the Titanic. Like, you know, we're just the music as the ship sinks.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's been an honor. So, uh, be, try to be as sane as possible out there, uh, be normal if you need a break. Obviously that's what we're here for. Uh, but I didn't, you know, cause then people are like, why are you not gonna...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sometimes you get people like, oh, we can't, they just want it to be like, everything's got to be the thing that they're looking up, you know? But just scroll bias. If you're, if you're in a news and I think it's good, if you're in a real news hunt, then just, yeah, slide right bias. Never would be upset about that. Uh, but maybe you need a break, uh, which a lot of people should be taking breaks.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Get crazy. Uh, so welcome. We're glad you're here. Uh, podcast about nothing. The Titanic band thing's pretty good, right? I like that. That's a great analysis.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I was thought about, you know, as we continue to describe what we are, I was like, that is just every, cause that band plays.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you are like, why are they playing? You're like, why not? What do you want them to do? You want him to grab something like, enough people are saving the world. He, you just need someone to be like, ah, look at that. You tell the kids, look, the song, the song's going. And they're like, oh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, would you ever sit there and watch that band? What if you just were on the Titanic and you're like, it's happening. I'm going to enjoy your show. Were they good? I mean, yeah, I think you're not being picky at that as the ship goes down.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't think you're, as you're on the Titanic and it's going down, you're not like, that's, this is not good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Your options are not just through the roof. You're like, let's go see if there's another band playing. Maybe there's another band playing on the other side of the ship. Uh, I think you're just happy to have something. I bet they're amazing. I bet you would go there if you ate food, if someone said, try this steak.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] As the ship went down, you would go, that's one of the best stakes I've ever had in my life. Cause you're, it might be the last.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Obviously, what did they go, can we get on a boat? You're like, you guys are killing it. What you're doing, man. Just stay over there. You know, as everybody goes away, it would be then if everybody does get off the boat and then you're like, oh, we could have got off. You're like, yeah, you should have got off. I don't know why y'all kept playing. No one was even listening.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do you play the hits or do you play your new stuff with that? I think you got to play the hits. Yeah. Can't just think I want to try something.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, uh, so, uh, we're gonna start off as always with your comments. We love hearing from all you guys, uh, comments on YouTube, Instagram, Twitter, Apple Podcasts, Reviews, and Nate Land and natebargetzi.com. First up, Dan Sterlin.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think so. Sterling, S-T-Y-R, Sterling, Dan Sterling. With everything going on since I just need to turn off my brain and this podcast is the perfect answer for that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It reminds me of turning on reruns of The Office to fall asleep. That's who we are.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, I, uh, yeah, it's, did you have your show? No, it's uh, Wednesday. Tonight. Tonight.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So if you're hearing, when you're hearing this, if you haven't got tickets, Zany's, uh, Aaron Weaver, like the grill Weaver, uh, is at Zany's. Noah, Noah stopped in the middle of his, Noah Stalker. We had a dog named Noah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No offense, Noah. Uh, Noah, you know, people take that offense. My buddy, Rich Day, his wife's named Holly, uh, which we're friends with his wife, uh, her name's Holly. And so we have a Holly. But I always, do people get- I'd be honored.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If they named the dog after you. Yeah, I think so. Aaron would be a weird dog name. Oh, would that be weirder than Holly? Aaron, come here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Noah Stalka, that, this episode started with the worst topic so far and ended up being the best episode so far. It makes me wonder how bad of a topic can Nate Bravo and Aaron work with? Personally, I'd love to see an episode on light switches. I would love to try to do an episode on light switches. Yeah, me too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I do like that it's, it's, it's, you gotta go to it. Cause I was thinking, if someone, if one of her, one of the folks, if you, if someone introduces someone, our podcast to them, I mean, it's definitely gotta be explained.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He can't be like, now check this podcast out and you walk away. You gotta be like, nah, you gotta.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You gotta stick with it. You're going to watch an episode on calendars and they're like, I don't care. And you're like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're watching everybody not care about calendars like it's, but it works for some reason. You just, you know, this is what.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Being a comedian is you gotta just have stuff to talk about to be funny. Obviously the main point of this podcast is to have jokes and laugh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, so we gotta talk about something, and it just can't be, and when you try not to keep it serious, you gotta talk about calories. Uh, Meg Scoville.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nate is one of my favorite comedians. However, no unscripted podcast needs to be over an hour. In my opinion, this podcast would benefit from tighter editing. That's a attack on our editors. They're all in the room and they're, uh, could tighten it up a little bit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, that's great. Thank you, Meg, for your, I do love it. Uh, you know, you do take, uh, uh, advice or criticism. Uh, I think it's good, but Meg, you can turn off now cause we read your quote. So.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't, you know, with it being over an hour, I get it. It's one of those, it is a weird thing that you think, should it be just quicker and tighter, uh, but then it's like, no, I mean, it's, it's, you know, cause it's like, well, just don't listen to it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you don't want to read comments, it's 20, 30 minutes. So skip that and you're roughly at an hour. Then, and it's, uh, yeah, but it's unscripted. It is unscripted. What if it was, we're like, well, Meg, we are pretty on script. Uh, I don't know what she's talking about.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, I think we would be too, it would be too tight. Two hours is, yeah. I mean, I think people listen throughout the week. That's what you do. Podcasts are kind of coming.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're just always there. When I listen to them, I've been doing them in movies lately at night. I don't want to watch the whole thing, so I just start it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I started this movie with Jason Statham, uh, Redemption. It's on Netflix.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I see, you know, it's Jason Statham. So you're like, all right, this will be just a fun. And it's, uh, it's like, he's trying to get serious and it's tough. Uh, it's, you know, it's like when they, you're like, just do the thing. He still does the thing he does. He, there's some fight scenes, but it's, I mean, I started, you're like, it's, I mean, it's a long.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's a long road to see that first fight and you, but I've, you know, I feel like it's Jason Statham going, no, but I'm a, you know, I'm a good actor. And you're like, yeah, yeah, no one's not saying that, but you can't, you know, you're not Tom Hanks, Jason. So let's just kind of do what you do.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I don't know either. But, uh, I promise it's not... That's a weird credit to use. I promise it's better than, uh, redemption. That's what its promises are. Uh, Matt Griffey.


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[Assistant] I completely lost it at the Juicy Fruit Five joke.


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[Assistant] Biscuit coming in hot with great one liners. Loving the podcast more and more each week.


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[Assistant] Thank you, Matt. That was a good one. Juicy Fruit Five.


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[Assistant] Mark Johnson, the check writing bit using the animal of the year from the Chinese calendar for the date, to me is the best moment from these podcasts. Genius Comedy Minds, thanks Nick, Aaron, and Bro-sure for making us all laugh and forget what we've all been going through. Uh, he did it, everybody, which I enjoy that. Bro-sure is pretty good.


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[Assistant] Skywest7, I'm an airline pilot and I started off the PA before landing with hello folks!


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[Assistant] No idea if anyone got the joke going to assume they didn't, but it made me laugh. And that's really all that matters. Keep up the good work. I, that's, I love it. Uh, yelled hello folks. I don't know if anybody would have, that would have been great. No one would put it together.


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[Assistant] Cause people say, I've seen folks everywhere now. You see people say it a lot more.


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[Assistant] When you, cause when you notice it, then you're like, oh, a lot of people say folks. Hello folks. That's a, that would be a good greeting on a plane. Maybe right before you hit the mountain.


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[Assistant] Hello folks, sorry to bother you, but we are about to hit up a mountain.


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[Assistant] And it's like, wow, that took a, that message took a turn. Goodbye folks. Goodbye folks. Hello folks. We're about to hit a mountain. Goodbye folks. Seth Asendrop, the Jewish calendar's only appearance.


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[Assistant] Only appearance was in a classic Weber comment that went completely unnoticed and everyone else rushed to get their point across.


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[Assistant] How could you not talk about the fact that Jewish kids get to celebrate two separate birthdays every year? That's gold Jerry, it's gold!


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[Assistant] They have two birthdays? And Jewish kids get two separate birthdays?


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[Assistant] Uh, Missy Safner, I listen to a lot of podcasts and I usually skip through the ads, but that isn't the case with Nate trying to sell me things.


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[Assistant] I sometimes laugh harder at the ads because it seems like it may be the first time Nate is reading it.


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[Assistant] It cracks me up to think that a company is paying you to sell their product and then he's like, yeah, I got this. And then he doesn't got any, then he doesn't got this. But to be fair, it's working. And I have a lot of cereal in my cupboard now. Thanks for all you guys are doing to make the world laugh. Magic spoon. That's what she's got.


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[Assistant] Big, like they just choose easy word companies. We can't, we can't do anything complicated. Just basic kind of stuff. Hello guys. If you've tried out a pencil, you write with it and it's a pencil. It's just, you know.


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[Assistant] Yeah, Helix. Yeah guys, just go buy this stuff and do us, help us out because they are all going to back away from this, this podcast.


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[Assistant] Why would they give you all this read? I mean, I read it before. Laura, Laura went and typed it out easier.


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[Assistant] Laura goes through it. That's Laura's work is just going, what, I make her take all the apostrophes that any...


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[Assistant] You know, grammar, I'm like, don't put that in there. When I read, I need, if it's, if the words don't.


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[Assistant] Still there, we got a landline. Landline that's wifi.


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[Assistant] Yeah. So, but it's like, that's not the point of it, right? That's like, that might as well have a cellphone.


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[Assistant] I said get a land, we want a land line. And Laura said they don't do that anymore, which I don't believe at all.


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[Assistant] That's what, that's what was their answer to it. Was, well they don't make those anymore. Like, well they have to.


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[Assistant] Uh, the main reason is for when I do radio calls. Yeah. So when you have to call and do radios, it's just better to have a, that phone is still better than the sound quality on a.


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[Assistant] For the construction workers, very, being very nice. Laura always puts baskets out for the delivery guys with waters and stuff. And then it gives the construction guys stuff too. And, uh, so she ordered pizzas, three large pepperoni pizzas, uh, at 3 PM.


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[Assistant] Which is when most of America does not eat lunch. But she figured late night snack, they thought, you know, whatever, they would get it and, uh, they've been working hard all day. And, uh, right before the pizza gets here, we watch them all leave. So then we just have three large pepperoni pizzas.


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[Assistant] They just all come. I mean, they drove by the pizza guy. And we, we, I mean, Laura just, you know, spent 60 bucks on pizza and then they're just like, well, I guess we're eating, guess we're eating pizza for the next month. Uh.


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[Assistant] Ashley Sandu, my dad and many family members are friends.


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[Assistant] Oh, and friends. Sorry. My dad and many family members and friends work at Eastman Chemical Company.


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[Assistant] That guy, I mean just the explanation of that to other regular people.


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[Assistant] This calls is a mess. Uh, can you go around Tuesday? Okay. Which calendar is it? Your Tuesday or my Thursday? What time do you want to, that's when you have to set up calls in different time zones. Danny Pritchard, Aaron, your foot pain sounds like gout.


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[Assistant] I'm 66 years old and just started experiencing gout in my foot and it is an identical feeling to what you described. I'm much older than you. You're a big boy.


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[Assistant] And just go up to the front and go, hey doing, uh, I think that's the cashier.


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[Assistant] I think you got your answer there, you don't need a doctor, you just mention it here. We got doctors on here.


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[Assistant] Yeah, we do. So you just say what your problems are and then they.


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[Assistant] I think this is, if gout feels like the higher percentage. Was there any other fun? Yea, there was.


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[Assistant] My name is Aaron Weber as in the grill.


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[Assistant] And I would like to cancel my fitness plan with you as you might've noticed.


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[Assistant] You were talking about doctors in the pod today and made me think of mine. I have had a new doctor for the last couple years.


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[Assistant] And during my annual physicals, he pulls up goo- oh.


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[Assistant] I can't read fast. That's the problem. I get ahead of my, you know, we're not in a rush. No, I know, but I'm saying that's why I get going.


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[Assistant] I mean, I get, I get, we get moving and then I just, I get started off wrong. During my annual physicals, he pulls up Google to look things up.


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[Assistant] Last year he Googled a cream I could use for sunspots. This year I couldn't hold back my laughter as he gave me a test he found on Google to see if I should be diagnosed with alcohol abuse disorder. I passed the test. Apparently Google can replace medical school. Jeff, you might need a new doctor.


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[Assistant] That's, that's, I mean, very funny that this guy, you're like, did you go to med school? He's like, I mean, kind of, I Googled a med school thing.


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[Assistant] And I went and did it. That's very funny just to be, that'd be a joke if Jeff's a comedian. Cause I mean, just to, just so funny to be like, as he looks and he's like, huh, like having a left foot hurts. He goes,


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[Assistant] Uh, what was the test? He goes, all right, I found a test for alcohol abuse disorder. Uh, are you an alcoholic? He goes, no. He goes, uh, I guess you passed the test. All right. All right. Well, I'm out of ideas.


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[Assistant] Matthew Carr, my family, had a history of high blood pressure, which reared its head in me when I was 25. My new doctor told me to buy a cuff and keep a log of my blood pressure for about a month prior to putting me on medication.


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[Assistant] I meticulously logged blood pressure by arm. Oh god.