[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Keeping up with all the cars, just skateboarding. That grinding noise it makes. And I'm thinking all it takes is a pebble. Or a drain cover that's slightly loose. Or anything. And you are gonna fucking die, my dude. Like, what are you doing? You've got nothing between you and the pavement. Come on, man. Life is so precious.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My kids are pretty tall, uh, I mean, I think my, my eldest is five foot four, and my youngest is just under five foot, so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, I guess I would put them on after the Kroggy incident, which we spoke about in Triforce, maybe a good 80 or 90 episodes ago now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So like, I felt, I still feel awful about, about it. It was just, it was kind of a wake up call really that uhm, you, you shouldn't take chances like that. Uhm, I'm, and they have to wear a helmet every time they get on a bike or do anything like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Helmet. Because it's, I mean, you know, if you break an arm or something, that's reparable. If you break a finger, that's reparable. But if you get brain damage, that's it. So be careful, kids, please.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So we practiced that for like 20 minutes or something to make sure that we had the camera movements down and everything and we chatted amongst ourselves what we were going to do and everything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I think 10 years ago, I would have been absolutely shitting myself about doing something like that. Whereas now, once you've done enough stuff,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] On a live stream or a live audience or in front of people or whatever, uh, you just don't worry as much. And I honestly, I owe a lot of that lack of fear to doing stuff with you guys, uh, streaming, uh, things like when we did the YodCon and when we've been to Comic Con, coming to face to face with people and meeting them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Talking on camera, being live, being aware of things that you say are gonna be.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you're just not gonna, you're hopefully not gonna make too much of a tit of yourself. Uhm, but you also are aware that if you do, people are just gonna find it funny. I think that's the main thing. Yeah, it's forgiving. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, that's, that's fair, but I mean, when the show opened, and I was there at the panel and it was the first day, it was a moment.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, but uhm, on Friday people were like, when the stream first started, there's no games for 45 minutes or whatever, so people were taking their time. On Friday in particular, it was a work day and a school day, people, you know, it was like a, maybe 1500 people or whatever. On the Sunday it was packed, like it was really really busy, thousands of people. Nice.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And yeaah, I'd say initially when it first started, when they were counting down, you're live in 3, 2, 1, there was a moment where I thought, am I nervous about this? Like am I genuinely...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like one of those. In passing. I tried to explain to the ESL, quite senior ESL exec that I was with, chatting to him in the arena why someone just came up and said to me


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, but here's why, because if you think about it, we spend, all three of us, spend all day on a computer or on our phone, or you know, on a fucking device of some kind. It's nice to take a break from that and do something


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What do they call it? Uh, not digital. Analogue, for a while. Like, to just relax. Writing something, I mean, I find it very stressful writing, because it hurts my hand, and my hand writing shit, and I just think,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like those people, uh, that go on the singing competition shows.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That had talent and perhaps didn't find their breakthrough up until that point and then made it big is very different. They're not just some guy that works at McDonald's that thinks he can sing. They can actually sing, they're just looking for their lucky break. There's a huge difference.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you have talent, if you are good at something, you should never give up. If it's not working out and everyone's saying to you this is not working out, maybe you should give up. Have a think about it. Just entertain the idea of giving up. That's all I'm saying.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So how old, so Moleskine, just to go back, well Moleskine, uh, 1997. That's when it was founded. It feels like this really old prestige brand, but it was 1997. Just interesting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, but if it said Moleskine, or however it's pronounced, since 1897, you'd be like, oooh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, what a wave. Oh man, guess what? I've been playing this game this week just to talk about this. Have you guys heard of the Cones of Dunshire? Uh, I have. In relation to what? So it was a joke on Parks and Rec, right? Where Adam, uh, invents a board game. He's unemployed and, um,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] His girlfriend, Amy Poehler's character comes back, and uhm, he's, he's, he's gone mad inventing this board game called the Cones of Dunshy, which is like ridiculously complicated. It's very, it's very funny. Mrs. F said that when she hears me talking about Dota, or some arcane board game that I'm playing, she's like, this is getting a little bit Cones of Dunshy, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So it's like, uh, you know, you must play as the provost, but he can only move in the hinterlands and he can deploy three bells using two resource cards and four trappists.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But if you haven't played this card game called Cultist Simulator, I'm sort of oddly intrigued by it, but my god, it's frustratingly arcane. You start the game, there's no indication of the rules or how things work. The descriptions on the cards are very arcane.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And there's no hints, there's no help, there's no tutorial, there's nothing. And the point is though it's meant to be a game of discovery, but it's like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You, you, you start off with a job card and work is the verb. And then there's also dream and study. There's like, you drag a card into one of those things and it tunders away and does it. It's like a real time card game. Like there's a timer on these things and it'll, when it's finished, it'll chuck out a card.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, or it'll chuck out two cards, or it'll eat a card. And then you'll get these random things like you are, you know, uh, not tired, but your reason is fatigue.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So the reason card now has fatigued and the eye is closed and you can't use it and then you get an ailment card and you have to dream about health and maybe it'll relive it. It's bonkers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it'll be like, for instance, you'll get a card that says fascination, and the fascination card will say, if you deploy two glimmerings and use your erudition, you may acquire a glimmering. It's like, what the fuck are you talking about? Like, an urgency of appetite when combined with a grail card can lead to an erudition, a lesson learnt. It's just, it's too much. Like, I'm really struggling to get into it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So here's my issue, I don't mind exploration in a game, and that's part of a game, but when there is a mechanical element to the game, like a card game, that will punish you if you do something wrong, you would at least like to understand what went wrong.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How did I fail? And the exploration, it takes a long time to play this game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're sort of dragging cards around and there's timers going and stuff and it spits stuff out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then something as simple as this mission is so hard that nobody can...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, I guess. I mean, it says here that the most players I've ever had was January 2013. They didn't even have two thousand people average.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh my god, so here's the daily live play account for the 24th of May, so two days ago the play account was 9,000. On what?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's different, uh, across cultures too, right? Like, there's more, I think there's, I think in, uh, in, in, in like, uh, Asian countries, especially, there's more of, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's more of that, right? I gotta pay, I gotta look after my parents, like, you know, they looked after me sort of thing, but I feel like in the West it's not like that so much at all, right? Like, people just sort of dump their parents into a home and never see them again kind of thing. Too much work.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If, if, if that's like the situation, like with your parents, then I think, yeaah, go for it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think for like with a lot of people, it's, it's not like, like my parents would, for example, not do that. Like if my parents lived with me, it would just be a hindrance and not a help. Like it would just be the worst.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, but I, but I know a lot of people whose parents are like, are really good like that, you know, really hands on, help with like everything, help with the kids and stuff, I mean, in my situation it's a bit different as well, I live very far away from my parents, so that day to day sort of stuff would never...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Would never be anyway kind of thing, but uhm, but yeah, it's, it's a weird one, isn't it? I don't know. Like, uh, I think if you're lucky enough to be like close to your family and, and, and, you know, they, they're still like a really big part of your life.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, some do, but honestly, like, I mean, I've lived long enough to know that most people do not change. Like, past a certain point in their life, if they're, if they are how they are, that's how they are. Like, it's very hard to change.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, you know, like major parts of your personality and stuff. Like, I'm not saying it doesn't happen, because I'm sure it does. I'm sure somebody out there probably has like a good example or whatever, but...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Generally speaking, I don't think most people change. Like I think, you know, I think you are who you are and you know, if it works fine and if it doesn't, well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, what can you do? You know, like it's just, uh, you could, you could try to work on it, but I don't know, man. Like I've just known so many people, like, like, you know, nice people, toxic people, whatever. And like they, they're, they're always, they're always the same. They never change. It's just, it's just, that's just my, my perception of people. Do you guys think that there


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's a, it's a, it's always like a really lethal combination of lots of things I feel like, you know, it's not, it's, I, it's rarely just like one, one thing, right? Like it's- You're right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Unfortunate uhm, you know, combinations of things to occur for people to end up just completely


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're never gonna forget that, uh, that interaction, that negative interaction with somebody, right? Like, you'll need therapy, everything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which is not a trivial crime. Of course not, no. But they eventually let him out early, but he was like, you know, almost 50 years old by the time he got out. So he'd spent, from the age of 16 until, you know, nearly 50 years old.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Reformable, I think. And some people just simply are not. And I think it comes down to that. And it's case by case for sure, you know? Like, I don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] God, every week my Philip K. Dick Appreciation Society meetings


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I never seen Black Mirror, but my perception of it is that, like, it's all these, like, mini stories about, like, these kind of, like, 1984-esque scenarios or something. Some of that, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's lots of stuff like, uh, you know, oh, if I get a hundred likes on Facebook, uh, if somebody dies and stuff like that, it's like all these like weird, uh, is it like a bit like that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, British customer service is really something else, isn't it? It's just like, holy crap.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you've been away on vacation somewhere nice and you come back, you're like, well, I'm definitely home. People are grunting at you and ignoring you and stuff, but you're right, it is reassuring.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's, it's pretty wild. It's, I mean, parts of it are quite enjoyable to watch. Honestly, it's very fun to watch with my wife because we both have a similar kind of attitude towards it, you know, like we don't really...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Take it seriously or whatever, make lots of jokes and stuff and it's, it's, it's, it's, it's good fun. We do the same with The Apprentice honestly, like The Apprentice is a bit like that too, but it's, I don't know, the, the, the viewing experience is fun. It's not so much the show that's any good, you know what I mean?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There was like constant references to, oh, that's, you know, they're doing that because it's going to look good on Instagram and whatever and stuff. And you think,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know how many followers these people have going into a show like this. I wouldn't have imagined like too many sort of thing, unless they were like, you know, big time influencers ahead of this or whatever. But none, I didn't know of any of them being, having like any big sort of presence on social media or whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's, it's, it's weird because some people you kind of, you almost root for, you're like, I actually, you know, like this couple and I hope that they do okay or whatever, you know, like they're-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're, they're fine. But then, you know, the crack show after a while and of course, you know, you can change your mind or whatever. And then some people you're just immediately like, this person does not stand a chance, like they're never gonna, it's never gonna work, they're broken or whatever. Like, uh, but it's, I don't know, man.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Treat yourself, I mean come on, like get in there, get all steamed up, get lathered up, shave your balls, shave your back.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, for Aragorn, all of the, all of the casting considerations all seem to be like greasy looking people. Like, is that just an Aragorn thing? You know? Like, they look greasy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Fuck me man, it's a big, it's a big one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, but listen to this though, the, um, Kate Blanchett's character in Lord of the Rings, uh, what's her face, um, Queen Galadriel, Galadriel or whatever. Okay, imagine Kate Blanchett was unavailable to do


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We need like, a big name at least, like something to...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Having said that though, I guess the Hobbit movies just didn't do as well at all.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wow, was that actually consideration? Yeah, jeez.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Plenty of really good examples of British actors doing really good American portrayals and accents, but not so much the other side.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And there are certain American accents where it's like, like the sort of like classic New York accent or whatever, you know what I mean? Like some of them don't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I didn't know, when I was watching The Wire, and uhm, like I did not know who, uhm, Idris Elba was.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I assumed he was just an American actor or whatever, like I was completely, I was floored to find out that he was proper London, British, like it's insane. It's crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So yeah, maybe it should have just been a two and a half or an.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, we wanna be the, we wanna know. We need to know. We must know. If we're done with Lord of the Rings stuff, can I say that I watched something interesting that maybe you guys have seen or maybe not, but you should check it out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's interesting, it was a Mr. Rogers documentary called Won't You Be My Neighbor. Not the film, but a documentary. It was an actual documentary and it was really good, really interesting. I will watch that, yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I haven't seen that. I haven't seen that. But, uh, but this, this documentary is called Won't You Be My Neighbor and it was, it was really nice, really good. Just, uhm, just showed you sort of, you know, him starting his, you know, Mr. Rogers neighborhood.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He really did, he really did. And, uh, near the end of the documentary when they're talking about, um, cause he died in, I think it was like 2003, and it was kind of sad because, you know, like, if you watched Mr. Rogers when you were a kid and you remembered


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The messages in the, in the, in the, in the programs and, you know, just his, his general sort of sensibility and stuff like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it was, it's sad cause near the, near the end, uh, when he did die and the, the, you know, the way, the, the direction society was moving in at the time and stuff, you know, this is a couple of years after like 9-11, this is a couple of years after, you know, the internet started getting, um, fairly prominent and big and stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And uhm, he was uhm, he, he, he had, there was people in his, like, you know, in his uhm, production unit for the show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Who were, were gay, but not openly gay because at the time it really wasn't the thing, right? Especially not to be involved in a children's program as well. Like there was just no way that they could sort of make that public or whatever. But he was always very supportive of people he worked with, his friends, tolerant, everything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And uhm, and, and, and later on after he died, like while his funeral was, was, was on across the street, there was like a big protest about, like a, like basically a hate, a hate group.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The sort of, like, weird part of the whole thing was that he was, like, you know, very religious, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, he was, yeah, yeah. And, like, sometimes, like, there's, like, negative connotations, like, with this, because


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, those aspects of religion, I'm definitely on board with, you know, like, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like the, like the community side of it, you know, like the, the charitable side of it, the, you know, like, uh, forgiveness of all men and, uh, and, and whatever, like, all those things, yes, but,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I switch off when they're like, well, God in the Bible says that you can't do this specifically. And it's like, well, nowhere in the Bible is it saying specifically not to do like this one certain thing that people have only become aware of like, you know, 2000 years later or whatever. Come on now. It's crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I didn't feel that. So, Lewis said to you this morning, what do you have prepared for episode 200? After all, why break with tradition and actually like prepare and make an effort? This is my normal pose when watching trifles, doing trifles. I just live out of my eyes closed. I just mumble. So I thought, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yep, wait a minute. Is this episode 200? Nah, if you add them up it's probably like 215 or something, but who gives a shit. No, but are we saying this is the big 200 episode?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What is this music? There's no music on Triforce, what's happening?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] TJ, could we turn the music off please? This is a place of silence and reverence. And reflection as well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, last few weeks it's just been drilling and hammering noises because of my bloomin' neighbors love conversion. So no, just a nice bit of silence. I'm not hangover today. In fact, I'm, I was stone cold sober yesterday, tried playing poker with Dav, Mike, Xylus.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ravs and me, it was the most miserable experience of my life. I stormed out at about 9.30 and went back to the hotel. Oh my god.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, so yeaah, it was that. So he spanned the wheel and it would say things like all in or fold or raise or tip the dealer and stuff and he managed to finish second overall by allowing a wheel to decide what happened. It was, it was pretty good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We could have just chosen something like, um, I have a real lust for life. Yeah, but we didn't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was Judge Rinder. It was Judge Rinder. Who the fuck is Judge Rinder?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do you have one, Lewis? Yea, but what did he get an NBA 4?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What ball machine would you trust actually with your balls? If someone described it as a ball machine, what is your, what is your version of what would be an acceptable piece of machinery to put your nuts in?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wonder if they're on the list of potential terrorist organisations.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What day is it today? Sunday? Yeah, it came down Thursday. Went to the pub. Uhm, and then Friday. What are we doing Friday?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oof. What's Friday the Poker? Friday was the Poker. Okay. Friday was... Did I do something else? It was Friday.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, my wife teases me about them. She always says, you painting your little man? I'm like, yes. And this is annoying because I'm in the kitchen and she's working from home in the kitchen. So she's flaming me in the same room just every now and then she looks up, still painting your little man. I'm like, yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I have painted my little men. Ben said, for a noob, he said, that's not bad, you've done better than I thought you were going to do, for a noob, I was pleased. The praise of Ben means a lot to me. Lewis also had something to say about it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yes, Toy Soldiers are okay. LEGO is not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The toy self is a historical recreation for those of us with an interest in the past. LEGO is nothing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What? Unless it's World War II. Official Lego.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The sad kid that's not allowed to use something. The sad onion. Because he's under three. This logo begs a lot of questions. First of all, he has hair like that. Second of all, he's aware enough that he's too young to play with the Seinfeld Lego set, which means he is aware of Seinfeld at the age of three. Yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The Kramer model needs to be bigger because he's incredibly tall. So I want to see his body and legs need to be longer. I don't know if that's going to break the Lego galactic rules.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's the only time I've seen the quiz. Alright. Willow. Anti-willow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What character does Val Kilmer play in the film Willow?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Where does Willow first meet Mad Martigan? Willowville. At the crossroads in a crowcage.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Piece of vegetation does the wizard of Willow's Village give to him in order to, uh, defend him when he's out in the wild. He gives him some magic watch.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sorry? He gives him acorns, and what do those acorns do when thrown at an enemy? Uh, kill them? They turn them to stone! Oh, close. Anyway, carry on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's not The Hobbit, surely, because he wrote that one before Lord of the Rings. It could be The Adventures of Tom Bombadil, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because we meet Tom Bombadil in the Fellowship of the Rings. He was in The Hobbit as well though, wasn't he, Tom Bombadil? Did they meet Tom Bombadil?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, but you've also just googled and landed on the first one. I think our expectation was that you would have the answers, we would buzz in, and you would quiz us.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think you'd just change your last name to sound like a hobbit clan. Like the Proud Feet.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or Sackville Baggins. Sackville.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, if you're a baker, what else have you got to listen to? The sound of bread rising. You know, come on, stick a podcast on Why Not Ours.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Architect says you got to always recommending the book Bread Rising. Very good. That's a Baker, Baker reference and an OG triumphal show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They were stressing last night about it because Joe said he was going to go mid against Dav.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And dad was like, oh, I'm not up for that, he's gonna, he's gonna destroy me. And I was like, you'll be fine. But he was really determined that this should not happen.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well, they were really, really determined that this is going to be a very serious, very important game of Dosh when I was like, lads, can you calm down? It's just a stupid in-house for a laugh so we can laugh at you. And they were like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, so. This could be a new segment!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Acronyms in my head to remember what of your Q, W and E you need to cast each spell. So if you want to do the tornado.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's WWQ, which is Windy Windy Quick.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So you, for instance, you go WWQ and press R to invoke that spell. That's now ready on your D and F keys. So you press D and you cast that one. And then if you did EEE, which is all the exhort,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, so 1,908 games total. Yes. So that's a smurf as well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So a lot of the pro players have a smurf account they use to warm up on, and to like goof around on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You went to, you went 0-15 on that bounding counter. Yea, we were watching, you went 0-15.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's one of your guys, huh? Hunter. Yeah. This is the issue. You're playing with baddies.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, it's Ashwin, is it? Oh no, that's Matthew. Okay, that's a problem.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, enough about Dota, we're about to stream it for the next two hours, so let's talk about Christmas.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because this is, uh, are we going to do another, another one of these before Christmas?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, same, same. And then the 23rd would be the next one, if we did one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've been reading the rules to bolt action ready for Monday's, uh, game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One whole week. And then, I've gotta pick up me mum on the way back.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She means I can't get drunk and lie on the sofa because she's like, Ted, it's a mess in here, clean up. And if I don't, she does. And then I feel guilty. So it kind of.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You don't do that to your mum, mate. I'll tell you what. No, I know you don't. Cause she'll either bollock you or get upset and then you feel, you either, you feel bad either way. No, no, no.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, sorry, I misunderstood. Alright.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Never. Never. I gave up getting them to tidy up. I go into their room and I say, this is a disgrace. That's what I always say. As if they're like, you bring dishonor on the house on four sides, you know. But I just say, this is a disgrace. This is absolutely unbelievable. And there's like crisp packets shoved down the side of the bed and just


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I go, I, I, I come in and I just go, yeah, alright, good job, down for dinner. And then the next day I come in and it's a mess again. And they've just tucked everything under. We've spoken about this before, Sips, I think, the tidying consists of concealing. I'm like, that's not tidying, that's camouflage, alright? You're not ambushing me. You've, you've, this, things have places to go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I say to them, look, I get it. You've come home from school. You've been looking forward to chilling out all day. You know, you've done your homework and now you just want to spend a couple of hours relaxing before dinner time and then it's into bedtime and stuff like that. So I get it. You want to chill, but just don't come in and just throw things on the floor by default. These are your things. I don't give a shit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We were invited to a friend's wedding one time and they were like, no children.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I'm sure I've told this before. I left the, I left, uh, this is our elder. She would have been in Nappy, so she would have been very little. Left it with my sister who just lived down the road.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, looking after other people's kids even when you know what you're doing is a fucking pain in the ass, so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Welcome back to Triforce Podcast. That's right. The hottest gaming news. The hottest gaming takes. And the spiciest chat, uh, with the oldest men in gaming.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I feel like they've got less, yes, they've got years of experience that should make them wiser, but they also have many less years to have to suffer the consequences of their actions.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it's culture, it's TV that's given them the idea.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've seen it, like, teenagers, but in my experience they tend to-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When I got mugged, it was like someone who was about my age in London, and like this was obviously when I was a teenager.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You got properly mugged. Well, not really. Mugged off. Or just like, uh, fully mugged. Someone, y'know, someone wanted my phone, y'know, back in the- this is back in the day, this is when phones were- Did they have a weapon?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yes. Yes, there was. It was a whole thing. I mean, I've told the story before. Did it make it in the paper? Was it in the paper? I don't think it was that kind of, I think it was an everyday occurrence.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, this is weird. Like, it's weirdly familiar because of the D&D aspects. That's the big thing in Strang- I just wonder if you are, like, one of the kids from Stranger Things in the 80s. No, I'm far less interesting. And maybe that's why you lost all your hair, because you went through this whole thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you're like a grown-up version of one of the kids who suffered this stressful event. A little bit like, um, the It, you know, It. Or the clown movie. Where they all grown up, they all grow up, don't they, for the sort of second chapter. So the first one is when they're kids, and the second one is when they're all adults, you see. And some of them have even sort of blanked out this


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's in the book, yeah. Yeah, that's probably a good idea not to have that. But there is Stranger Things as well, there's a bully character as well called Steve, who is like an unlikable jock kind of guy. And then he becomes, um, like a


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's so many new cool games that I played during Tiny Teams and I just felt like, so that was what we did last week. It was uhm, it was just this great opportunity to test out hundreds of new things. And to some extent it burned me out a little bit in that my attention span


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Became super like, low. Like, I couldn't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, you know, it's almost like, I've, I've, you know when you, I did this thing where I played a new board game every day and after a while I was like, man, I've played all of them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it felt like I had played all of them because it was very few and far between when there was a mechanic that I was like, oh, okay, so this is like that bit from Azul, but this bit from Viticulture or whatever, you know. I was almost like at this point where every game was just this other game, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alex actually played every single one, which is mad. Whereas I went through and just played the ones that I thought looked interesting, but I still ended up playing hundreds of games. And it was really cool to try that new stuff, but now...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm just like, I'm finding myself getting bored after an hour in any game. It's really weird.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know, somehow. It's very British to have a doorbell like that though.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Did you play, I saw you played Cult of the Lamb and Farthest Frontier, which are both expensive indies that came out this week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Bonkers, it's funny though. Does it feel anything like Don't Starve, or is it more, like, arena-y, battle-y?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well I think this is why people are looking for, looking at magic again, which is why PFLAX and there's a sort of, there's a sort of bit of a groundswell around magic gathering.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right. You were desperate. I haven't had a few people get into it. I mean, the thing is, for me it's too expensive, really, like, just, it's like Hearthstone times two or three it feels like, just so costly to buy all the packs, and they're so quick as well. I know this sounds stupid, but...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel the same way. In fact, I feel, I feel almost the opposite. You're actually really right about this. When I lose in certain games, I get really salty.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So this week, um, Ben invited me to a tournament for one of these, um, miniatures games that we play, which is the Song of Ice and Fire, Game of Thrones miniatures game, right? And because, partly because the new House of the Dragon


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, it's the new HBO show, it's the new, I mean, Game of Thrones is the biggest show on TV, right? House of Dragons is supposed to be, you know, a very different story that's due very shortly, I think.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm just, no, I'm hyped. I'm really hyped now actually. I just want, I just, no, anyway, uhm, I went to this, uhm, thing and so Ben was like, yeah, there's only three of us, so it would be good if there was a fourth. So I was like, okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So we, we drove out to this village, uhm, called Iron Acton, which is in about ten miles out of Bristol.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And uhm, like the guy was waiting for us and he'd set up two tables, but there was like down the other end of the village hall, there were some other folks doing other board games, right? And other games, but there were only about sort of five or six of them. And they were playing some old like, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's the kind of thing we were dealing with. But no, it was uhm, it was fun. We had, I only managed to get one game, but it was weird being in a little village hall, and uhm, playing this game again.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I have noticed that these things are all adjacent to the train set in the Loft, you know. It's very close to that. You know, so a step away from that is Napoleonic kind of era miniatures wargaming, you know, and then close to another one, you know, that's a step away from


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, action, which is a step away from Warhammer. Everyone's, you know, slightly along that curve somewhere. And you'd think we'd all be friends, but no, we don't really have... All four of those groups are very distinct.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Might as well share it with everyone. Can you explain to me what Relail is, P-Flex, so you'd actually even know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yes. So I went into, there's a bar in the bottom of Park Street in Bristol called Java, and upstairs they have a lounge that you can rent out for events. And I went in and I was like, what the fuck is this? And I found out it was uhm, when the, when the Mauritania, which was this cruise, like Titanic style cruise liner,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's, yeah, it's almost like you have to, it's like D&D though, it's like you're, it's like you're in a set, which is kind of, but you have to kind of like, just suspend your disbelief, you know, you're not, you're not comfortable, you don't feel like you're in the right, you feel like you're in some fake


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, one of the biggest pyramids, um, Bobo was talking to me about was the flippin' one in Texas, the sporting goods tech pyramid.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is very photogenic though too, right? That's the other funny thing about it all, like, it's actually almost leaned into our modern world, right? Like, because I assume that this sort of tourism started happening when, you know, when people were taking pictures and stuff and sending postcards, right? But it's just become more and more exaggerated.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's very safe, and it's what they know. I honestly really have, like, respect for people who go on holiday to places like Petra, or like, even like the Taj Mahal and things. I mean, these are obviously very standard wonders, tourist wonders, even like the pyramids, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] From what I've experienced, even just going to the Eiffel Tower and seeing what a tourist trap is with the scammers and the botherers and all the poor people everywhere, it's horrible, right? I know what it would be like, I just find it so stressful to think about going and dealing with all the...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you hear all of the horror stories about Everest and the trash and the cubes, I think it was like busy and stuff, like, I dunno, like, it's just, ugh, you just hear about like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But no, I mean, I just don't want to go to the pyramids or any of these landmarks really, because I just feel like they're... I could just go on Google street view, look at it from the road outside and be like, yeah, that's probably what it looks like. I could imagine having to not deal with...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Blazing heat and the like, like, trying to get around and being sold a carpet. I just don't need it. I don't need it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I read Death on the Nile. I listened to it on the audio. And I was interested because, and I looked into Agatha Christie a bit, and she was obviously, you know, she was writing these books between sort of the pre-Second World War, post-Second World War period.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And before the, before the second world war, Egypt was this very popular place to go for sort of rich English people as a holiday. And there were all these very nice luxury colonial era hotels in Egypt. It was a hot place. It was quite luxurious. It was seen as like this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This, this destination for the time, uhm, and she spent quite a lot of time there. And she got big into archaeology as a result and ended up marrying this archaeologist and going around doing archaeology, which is a very, cause she, she did, uhm, another book about, uhm, I guess a Christian, one of them was on the, on a


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know it's obviously a fiction, but it's very much a comfortable village hall. You know, Agatha Christie's famous for her Englishness and, you know, the cosy...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, tease around the, the, the doilies and you know, book clubs and everything like this, you know, gossiping people, going to the church, you know, just the English country life, right? But it's also English.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Honestly, little has changed, you know, especially with like, I was reading one of the books that was written in like 1930 or whatever. And it was like this village with all gossipy old women watching people and doing stuff and coming back and forth. And it was just like fucking today. It's like nothing has changed in a hundred years, it feels like, you know, growing up in a village. It just, it just showed me so much.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I go into this village hall, it's just like, nothing's changed. You know, there's still old men playing chess or playing a different game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In the village hall, you know, on a Tuesday night.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh man. There is, I always think this is a strange thing though, like, it seems like at a certain age you get interested in gardening, or you get interested in, I don't know, like, do you know what I mean? Like, different, like history, you know? Maybe it's because you have more history.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Woodstock is interesting because it happened in 1999, I was obviously 16, I was someone who was maybe a couple years too young, but around about the age that loved those bands, Limp Bizkit, Korn, Luke and Park, Rage Against the Machine...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But this is, I really feel like I was that rage-y teenager at that age, right? Like, I was a kid who'd watched Fight Club, and I'd watched American Pie, and I'd watched... You almost had this, they talk about it a bit in the documentary, but this generation was really familiar to me, because I was


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Dave Morph, the Chads of Morph, and as you said from the Woodstock era, but again, I think the first Woodstock was like a rebellion against Vietnam and these other wars that were going on and, and against violence, right? It was this great pacifist peace, peace and love movement of, you know, look, let's make love not war, you know, the whole thing. And, and the music was different too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I guess like by the time the mid 90s was going on and the late 90s, it was a different generation. And, and, and this is the people at Woodstock were young, you know, very young, like 16 to 18 to 20, you know, people were like, oh, they're messing around, but they're just stupid.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kids, right? They're, they're not like actively terrorist cells, do you know what I mean? Or like, they're like, they're not, you know, some sort of insurrectionists or some sort of deep-seated people who have a belief. They have no, they just, they're just kids who think it's funny to smash stuff up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it's cool to smash stuff up. That's what, that's what I was, and I feel like


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If I was in America at this time, I could very easily have, me and my mates at school could have very easily been in those, in that world, in that, at that concert, you know, setting fires to stuff. Uhm. Jesus. And not caring, you know? Yea, I guess. I haven't really thought about what I was like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You do have those frat boy bros culture still happening in a major way, even now, very common. I hope it's less than it was, but it definitely is like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Engrained in American culture in a different way to here, though. You have, I mean, when I was at uni there were no frat houses and no... No, it's not a very UK thing. No. No, like, culture around that, you know, but, but I'm, I'm sure I'm positive it's still a major part of college life in America. It is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like, from watching the documentary, like no one died, right? And there were a quarter of a million people there, and they would fires and smashing and riots and crazy crushes, you know, and like loads of people moshing. I mean, obviously there were plenty of injuries and a lot of


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] sexual assaults and stuff happened, you know, which is fucking, that was the worst thing I think about the documentary, just the amount of like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] People weren't being careful, I think, but there was no security as well, and people were very drunk, and a lot of drugs, like, there just wasn't enough, like, actual...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Protections put in place to stop people going absolutely fucking crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think Fire Festival, you're like rooting for it to fail, whereas Woodstock is really sad.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I love these deep dives into these events though as well. I think sometimes, obviously even the documentaries don't cover everything and there's probably a couple of books about it. I'm sure, yeah. Yeah, it's definitely great to just, I just don't know about all these cool bits of history and you're constantly seeing them. There's so much history as well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, exactly. That's what it is, right? We can all listen to whatever we want and everything goes. There are still some things that dominate, but they're not


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Even though they don't dominate, like, you know, the wet ass pussy and stuff like this, like, only lasts for much less time, and is much more, you know, segmented. Sure, you still have, like, super superstars, like Lady Gaga or whatever, but they don't feel like they're


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] As, you know, I guess back in the day, in the 90s, we got all of our music on a couple of radio stations at MTV or whatever, you know, that was, they were such taste setters. Whereas now...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, we'll buy it. We'll buy us his big brother, whatever his name is. Murray Bauman? I don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So for the first time, you know the proms, which is a very old school British thing where they do classical music. Wank. They did a gaming, they did a game music proms this week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Um, it's like a two hour concert, they've got like music from, you know, Battlefield 2042, Shadow of the Colossus, Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy. Some people love that game music. You know, some of it is real epic good music as well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So yeaah, that's, that's available for next month if you want to listen to the old, uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it'll be alright, yeah. Yeah, enjoy that. Yeah, yeah. That's very village-y country. That's very, like, local town, isn't it, that stuff? That's it, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Oh man. That sounds exactly like what it is. Uh, alright, well there you go. That's Triforce. That was a good one. Thank you for joining us everyone. It's good to be back. It's good to have us all back together. I've missed it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Big into that. Even though, but don't you remember when you were reading it as a kid? It was a bit like, and I think the Simpsons, I mean the Simpsons definitely was inspired a lot by Mad Magazine. They reference it constantly in the show. In the first ten seasons anyway. And when it was written by a bunch of old funny people instead of young unfunny people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, it's funny because it was- My mom always hated that show, she never gave it a chance. Really? And I'm like, do you have any idea how good the Good Simpsons episodes are? Like, they're mindbendingly good. And she was like, no, no, load of rubbish! I was like, god damn.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but it was a split-screen, player-versus-player game, and you had to go around in this environment and set traps for the other spy. Uhm, and it was really, really good, like, it seemed...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, no, this is, yea, Spyro's a Spy 1984 video game, so if you look at the- holy shit dude. It was genuinely really good. I mean it was a- it was split screen so you could both play it at the same time, and you were against each other, you had all these traps, you could set bombs, you had to wallop each other and stuff, it was good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, uh, they still published it, either until recently or they still make it, I can't remember. But I remember seeing it when I went to the States, it would be in the newsagents and stuff like that. Uhm, and,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They would parody something that was popular that week. Uh, so when Star Trek The Next Generation came out,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They had a Star Trek The Next Generation episode of Mad Magazine where they parody it and they have a stupid crew and they do all stupid things and it just, it was like a satire of whatever was popular right then and there. And then you'd have all your regular features and they'd be, you know, they'd be taking the mickey out of politicians and stuff like that. It was kind of like a comic mixed with


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The funny stuff from Private Eye. So it never did any investigative stuff, but there would be like wordy stuff in there that was like making fun of whoever was famous, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, it was, it was, I, I, sure that an awful lot of comedians and comedy writers, I should say, started off in something like Mad Magazine. The way a lot of people started off with The Onion, a lot of comedy writers started off with The Onion and then moved on to writing for things like John Stewart and all the rest of it. Uhm, those kind of things are a hotbed for...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know if it was Will Sasso. Will Sasso was like a big bald dude who was really funny. When Vine was popular, he was really really funny on Vine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've had a lot of corrupt officials in it, but this is really a bunch of bad coppers running rogue in Baltimore. But yeaah, I can't say anything about it, I haven't watched it. But I did watch Julia.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which is, uhm, sort of biopic series of Julia Child, who was a chef in America in the sixties. Oh wow. Uhm, and beyond, uh, and she was six foot two. She had a very peculiar way of, of speaking where it was an American accent that kind of sounded British, and she spoke about...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'd like you to bear something in mind, which is that I wonder if the Americans did the same thing that we did.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Where regional accents were basically not something you heard that much.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're lucky that every one on TV is not Northern. Every advert is certainly a Northern or apparently people trust a Yorkshire accent more than any other accent. That's the most trustworthy accent that you can have in an advert is Yorkshire. Which is why people like Sean Bean and all those other people with Yorkshire accents.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It sounds like sewer English to me, like it doesn't sound good. The name, the name is bad. I mean, received pronunciation sounds wank as well. Like, I think basically people got sick of all that shit and just said, can people just speak with their normal accent and get on with it? Like, that's fine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, I think the public started to not give a shit about- television basically became so many channels that why would you stuff them all in and say everybody has to sound a certain way? I think there was a kind of liberating thing. Once television got out under just the control of the BBC,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which is very much about, you know, the establishment and everything like that. And now you had all these other channels, especially channels like ITV and Channel 4.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Honestly, Cary Grant was great, though, and I've tried for a very long time to perfect a Cary Grant impression, but what's the point? Because he's such an old impression, it's like, I really wanna nail my Charlie Chaplin, y'know, it's like... I know of Cary Grant, but I can't place him... I don't know what Cary Grant sounds like, so I can't...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'd say North by Northwest is probably the film that you would think straight away Cary Grant because it's such a, I mean it's a Hitchcock movie, it's a great movie, he is absolutely brilliant in it. I think that he was the first, and I'm sure someone will correct me on this, but I think he was the first movie star


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Who could be the handsome leading man, cause he was incredibly handsome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He was also very funny and I think that he was the first leading man who was happy to play the clown as well and be the object of fun. Right. And it made him even more likeable. I think if you have the confidence to be laughed at,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't remember that. So it's a great scene. He's in a restaurant and his sinuses are blocked and he's doing that. Oh, okay. Like that over and over again. Very funny. So that was the old couple movie.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So then they made it as a TV series, The Odd Couple, which I loved as a kid. Anyone that grew up in the States in the 70s or 80s will remember The Odd Couple show. It starts off with the Felix Unger character picking up


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And Larry Hagman, who was, uh, uh, JR Ewing in Dallas, was an astronaut with him. She falls in love and eventually marries.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We should be, we should be, you know, pleased with something. Certainly the Elizabeth line is a prime example of what it can actually fucking do. There you go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I saw that about the very small amount of clearance, I think it's the northern line, I think it goes over the northern line at some point on the Elizabeth line, and it is a tiny amount of clearance, and I'm thinking, they must have tunneled that so slowly, because you'd be so worried about collapsing the tunnel beneath you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You must have clicked something related to it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My, my kids occasionally come to me with facts and I'm like, no love, that's bollocks. Like you've, you've seen a video. That's bollocks. And they were like, oh really? I was like, yeah. I said, anytime you hear this stuff, go and look it up. Seriously. Wikipedia is a decent bet.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what I'm saying, I'm saying like, you can't trust YouTube, but they both know that by now. Do you know what actually woke them up to it? Was all those life hacks videos? Where they tried to do some of them, they realized it didn't work, they were like, this is a load of bollocks and they do not trust YouTube anymore. So I think if you want to prove to people that YouTube is a load of bollocks,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think they tried. I think what they're forgetting is that a lot of that old TV that was so popular in the 80s, the A-Team Knight Rider, was shit. It was shit. And if you watch it again, you're like, wow, this sucks. Like, this is really bad. And they tried to reboot it with the core idea, and the core idea is okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You can't deviate too far of people that get nostalgic for the A-Team and shit like that and Airwolf and all of these. Watch the originals and think this is wank.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What do you think he does when he's off? Does he just wander around? I bet he loves it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's actually two people that I talked to you about this? No.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, no, so they combined their names of like Leon and Bronson and they realized that they were both really good at basketball. They were twins. They'd recently moved from another town. This was like one of those weird lucid dreams where I was half awake half asleep and I was just kind of making it up in my head as I went along.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And basically they concealed, like I was in the dream, this was the biggest sports scoop of all time. I mean, can you imagine if you open the newspaper, you know, you looked at a news site, LeBron James actually two people. Like you'd be like, what? And the way he's maintained his career,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then as I, as this was happening, I'm, you know, my brain is adding details cause I'm like, like I do this sometimes when I'm not awake and not asleep. I think it's lucid dreaming is what they call it where you kind of.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, no, they're both really good. They're both really good. But I thought they blended into one. No, no, they, they take turns playing. Right. Uh, and the, the, if one of them is injured, like he conceals the injury, because obviously,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But they stay on top of each other like, come on man, and they practice just the two of them. So that's how they do their training, because you know, the other one, and the thing is, if you go into training, they're like, this is the new moves, you know, this is the new set play we're gonna do or whatever. The other one comes home and says to the other one, alright, here's what happened at training today, let me run you through it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh god, what if this becomes a new one? Like, I was thinking the way you could explain his dips in form is that's when one brother's injured and the other one is having to play all the games, and he's not used to it, and so you know, you'll see


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, so you, but you, you wouldn't notice, you know, unless it was a long period, you'd be like, wow, LeBron's shooting is really off this month. It's actually because he's recovering from a sprained ankle. You know, one of the, Leon is recovering from a sprained ankle. Bronson, meanwhile, is having to carry the weight of all of these games. And they're not used to playing game after game after game. They're used to having a day off.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The obvious downfall is that one of them starts partying and the other one is taking it seriously and he's like, come on man, like you can't do this. One of them gets a fucking face tattoo without, you know, he gets drunk and gets a face tattoo and he's like, now I've got to get a face tattoo, otherwise the jig is up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So like, whatever, any, one of the, and one of them is like pushing it, getting a, getting a, you know, an eyebrow ring, a nose ring, face or two, becoming all Dennis Rodman, and the other one's having to do this just to keep up. So I thought that was quite, you know, there's all kinds of ways you can fuck with it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You have to get the other twin to do the face tattoo and try to make it as good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, no, no, the minor leagues in baseball at least is definitely not where the drafting comes from. Those minor league teams are owned by the major league teams. They're their farm teams. So they'll have triple A, double A, single A, and then rookie teams and stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, so they get them out of high school and college and they stick them in the U-team and then when, oddly enough, you, like, if you think about football, you start playing football at a young age, just like you start playing baseball.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, but there are plenty of footballers that start, get their Premier League debut at like 16, 17, 18. In baseball it's not uncommon to be 24, 25 before you step up to the bigs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They should just be called the Gooja Rats. And they're just like, you know, like the rat, like the Skaven themed team.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it works in terms of getting very rich people to buy into it. Cause you, if you're gonna launch a new league, you're basically looking for people that are like worth half a billion to a billion or more, or huge businesses to say, yes, we want to buy this slot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I mean, I also was watching that F1 drive to survive thing. I started watching that because a lot of people have been saying that's really good and has got them into Formula One. Is it good? And it's really good. I watched the first episode, I watched the second episode and I'm still interested. I then got distracted watching other things, but


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's really good. Cause you saw the behind the scenes stuff. One of the, one of the, uh, the worst thing that's happened in the first episode I think it was,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, like, fuck, we didn't put the front left tire wasn't on properly. I'm like, alright, well, we'll do it right next time. The other car for the team comes in and they do the exact same thing. Put the front left tire on wrong. So they were in a great position. This was a great position for the team. They were going to do really well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they ended up with two no finishes, it was just, and the guy, like, they spoke, they, you can see the boss talking to the guy afterwards, and I was just thinking, if that was me, I'd fucking fire this guy, like, I'm sorry, you have one job as the tire guy, you put the fucking tire on the car, how could you trust him next time?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You can't be- people would be wondering, why did this- this guy failed twice to do his one job, put tire on car, and you're gonna trust him a third time? Come on. Anyway, it was interesting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But even worse than that is they are provably, literally better than other people. Like they're invulnerable to damage, you know, they can fly, they can shoot lasers at other eyes, they're incredibly strong.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, you know, you can't harm them. So that gets into their head that they are better. And everyone's around them telling them they're here and how great they are. So their egos are out of control. And then they see people as less than them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And there's way more sex and stuff like that in the, uh, and genuine gore.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I mean, also this week, uh, the cycle frontier came out. It's like a talk of a like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just, I guess that the idea is it's like a, you get people to download the full game. If you put the word demo, they're going to think it's less than the game and they know they're being denied stuff. You give them the full game. You say, look, it's the complete game. And then they go, I, yeah, I will, I will spend money on this. Like that's.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think, I thought two was too many, honestly, and now three is just like, Jesus, there's always something. It's crazy. I just like, I like fully now just eat standing in my hallway and stuff, like I just, there's no time to, to really do anything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I mean, it's, it's, it's okay for now, but yeah, it's like, you can, you can clearly see where it happened. It's like, it's like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's been like bleached and like anti-backed and everything so there's just like a big circle in the middle of our floor that's completely off color to the rest of the carpet and like the fibers are all like fucking hard and shit like it's, I think all the poop is out but it's uh, it really, it really did a number.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Once he goes up to the big boy school, it's gonna be an even worse sort of thing. So we have the contrast of that with a fresh one year old who is still teething and shitting and barfing like yesterday.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The middle one, like I guess it's true what they say about the middle one, the middle one just gets forgotten. The problem with the middle one as well is that you expect them to be more like the eldest one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, uh, our middle one's still six. But we, we always like wrongly assume that she's...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Much older than six, so we're all, we're, we're like probably a bit harder on her than we, we need to be, uh, not allowing her to just be six, right? Right, yeaah, six is little. Because it's much easier for us to have two older kids with a baby than it is to have a middle kid with a, with a baby as well. So it's a weird one for sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, compare away, it's fine, it's fine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, every trip that we've been on, it's always said like, uh, you know, when you order food, you always end up with so much because we're used to getting, uh, a reasonable size portion that you're expected to finish, right? Like if you, if you, if you dine out over here, they don't give you too much. And oftentimes actually they give you too little, right? But


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, the expectation is that you're gonna finish your food, your, your plate of food or whatever, but in America it's not, it's like, it's like three or four servings worth, and the expectation is that you take a bunch of it home with you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I think it's the demographics different too, right? Like in Florida, there's like a lot of like, um, you know, like, uh, older people, but like, you know, like, uh, middle-aged, but like pushing like, you know, people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pushing like, uh, you know, mid forties to fifties and stuff like that. And I think that's when a lot of weight, like a big, yeah, a lot of spread occurs, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They, uh, uh, from, from my experience with Americans as well, they know a lot about food, right? Like they, like almost obsessively know a lot about food and like, and like seasonings and sauces and stuff like that. I know I've got a pretty bland palette and like I eat fairly bland stuff. I eat like a five year old, like most of the time, but, um,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Holy crap, you've just described like five or six things that are gonna be...


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[Assistant] Did you, uh, did you watch any Sunday TV? Sunday TV is just a completely different kettle of fish, like to, to like their normal weekly TV. Cause Sunday morning TV is just, it's all church stuff, right? Like most of the channels almost like have


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's like, it's like all the time over there, right? Oh, it's crazy. Every time we've been to LA, there's always, they're always in the middle of a drought.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, it was, it got up to 37 here the other week, and, uh, everybody was just losing their fucking minds, like, it was unbelievable. It's just too hard.


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[Assistant] People often aren't impressed by it, which baffles me, because it's amazing.


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[Assistant] Generally, like pretty high spirits, like anytime I've ever been, it's always been pretty fun because you just bump into people that you just talk to randomly or whatever and stuff. It's like, it's that kind of place, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like Red Light District in Amsterdam, for me, was kinda like the same vibe as Vegas at night. You know, when you're out on the street, walking in between the casinos and stuff in Vegas, it's a little bit the same.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Atmosphere wise, right? Like, everybody's just like, seems to be having a fun time, or whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Then the contrast, like Vegas during the day, you see like lots of families taking pictures of all these big casinos and stuff, like it changes, but it's still, it's still not like, it's not like so much of a change where you're like all of a sudden feeling like, oh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Robbie Williams has come over here to perform at Fort Regent as well, which is hilarious, because Fort Regent has a seating capacity of like maybe 400 people, so it's like, imagine like the smallest show that you've ever been to for like a punk band or whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oftentimes you're not going to be working in that neighborhood because there's just not, you know, a neighborhood will have like a couple of convenience stores, maybe a supermarket, gas stations, the usual stuff that you need to commute.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, city or town, you, you, you will live close enough to where you work sort of thing, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's not, you're not in a car for like, you know, 2-3 hours a day or whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's gotten to the point now where there's been so many Batmans, and they've had so many names for movies of Batmans, that they've just had to resort to The Batman.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] On the topic of franchises where, uh, finally something good comes out of them, uh, I'm thinking of, uh, The Mandalorian. The reason I'm thinking of The Mandalorian is because I'm thinking of, uh, Jon Favreau.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The reason I'm thinking of Jon Favreau is because I watched a couple episodes of Seinfeld yesterday, and the first episode I watched was, uh, The Fire. I don't know if you remember The Fire, but it's the one where, uh, George goes to a, uh, kid's party with a clown, and, uhm, he's obsessed with Bozo the Clown.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he's trying to explain to the clown at the party who Bozo the Clown was.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And the clown turns around and he's like, you're living in the past, man. You're talking about a clown from the sixties. And the guy who says that to him is John Favreau. He's, he is the clown. Yeah. So he's like a younger John Favreau.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, the Hamptons, which is the one with shrinkage, if you remember that one, where George gets caught with shrinkage.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How you guys walk around with those things? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So uhm, so in that same episode, George, uh, George's girlfriend of the time goes onto the beach topless, but he hasn't had sex with her yet, but Kramer


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know if you remember the scene where they're all looking at her on the beach topless.


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[Assistant] Chris Waddle. Yeah, weird. Scutcho! Booteros, Booteros, guys.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's uh, that'll be Florida if you're American or Vancouver Island if you're Canadian. That's right. These are all the popular retirement spots.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, listen, one more mention of Seinfeld because, uhm, well, Flax is the way I mentioned it on WhatsApp, but if you ever get a chance to watch the episode where, uh, Jerry, uh, George and Elaine all help, uh, the elderly,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, yeah, George, George gets the assistance to, uh, to lube up his bald head. And so he could rub his head all over her body or something like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's a good one, but yeaah, it sounds exactly like Purion's Coupon Lady, which is, uh, which is the music.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's a good one. Listen, uhm, I was playing, uh, cause we were running a little bit late this morning and I knew we were late. I was playing some SNES classics on the Switch with my son. And we were playing Pilotwings. I don't really remember Pilotwings, but man, what a game. It's so much fun. What was the graphics?


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[Assistant] Yes, it was the same they used for F0. It was like, uh, it was like this way of presenting frames very quickly so that it gave you the, the sense that you were like in some, some form of like 3D or whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I was like, here, give this a try. It's really fun. I used to play this when I was a kid or whatever. And he's like, he tried, he tried to do the skydiving. He tried to land the biplane and everything and he just couldn't do it. And he was like, oh, you know, it seemed fun, but he couldn't do it. He's like, here, you have a go. And I was like, oh, I don't know if I remember how to play this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sure enough. Fucking aced it. Like, uh, I don't even know how I remembered. But man, I was just on it. Like, I was hitting all the rings, I was getting the perfect landings, I landed my, I did the skydiving land onto the moving platform and everything. He was like blown away.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, he's been playing a lot of Fall Guys recently, like so much so actually he's finished the entire season pass, uh, the current season pass. He's unlocked all the skins and everything and he's like, he's really, really quite proud of himself sort of thing. So I'm trying to teach him now to not spend


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I do too. I miss being that excited about anything. I do too. Yeah. That's the beauty of having kids is that you get to relive the excitement of being a kid through your kid sometimes. Sometimes. I'm not going to say all the time because when you're up to your neck and diarrhea and stuff it doesn't feel great. You also relive that stuff. You do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Exactly. But uhm, but no, for the fun stuff, it's great. Yeah, it's really good. Oh my god. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So what was he doing? Was he just really going for it? Like, getting carried away?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, for, for the most part it was fine. Uh, looking back now I'm surprised I didn't die because the traffic and everything was quite bad and I didn't really know what I was doing. But, one, uh, one thing that happened was when I was trying to go over like, uh, road median, uh, I had to like lift the scooter and it hit my ankle and my ankle was sore for like two weeks after.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Get back to our trot! Poor trot, man. Seeing poor little trot take a tumble like that. It's pretty upsetting. It hurts, it hurts, doesn't it? It does, it really does, yea. I had, uh, I had some, uh, some domestic upheaval recently. Would you like to hear about it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it's freed up this huge cabinet in our kitchen where we're going to build this spectacular set of drawers, like pantry style drawers and a cupboard on top. Oh man.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I have like a big deep drawer to put, uh, like cereal boxes and stuff into.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just stacked, yea. Old crap that nobody uses. Old cups that nobody touches anymore, like, uh, just old condiments and shit that nobody's ever opened.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's in there somewhere. Some, some, some things we, every once in a while, like we don't do like a full kitchen, but like sometimes a cupboard will just get so bad that one of us will just say, ah, pull everything out and just try to reorganize it a little bit sort of thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, the amount of stuff that comes out of, uh, any cupboard that is out of date is unbelievable. Like you just hang on to this stuff for no reason, just for it to go out of date. And then you just think, oh, well, I'm not eating that now. Just chuck it out. It's such a waste of time. It's crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, we were able, they, they put the elements on in the tank, uhm, every night before they finished up. Cause that, like, they, they're trades people, right? So, they start early and end early. So like, 3, 34 o'clock they were out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But before they left, they would make sure the element was on in the, in the tank, the old tank for a while, but then the new tank, cause we had to get a new water tank as well. And uh, so we were able to shower like at night.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But like by the time the tank warmed up, it was like late at night sort of thing. But it was okay. Like it was, it was alright. We just bought lots of bottled water for the day, you know, like people needed water for whatever got thirsty and then, uh, and then just washed at night. It was alright. But it's just, it's the upheaval of having


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's all these people trudging in and out with stuff. I had to do a whole bunch of uhm, stuff on like the side of the house to drill holes in for like, like new electrics and shit like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it was pretty, it was quite, quite a big job. Yeah. It was, it's worth doing though. I mean, we don't have to, uh, order fuel now, which is kind of nice. And we don't have this big noisy jet engine in our kitchen anymore.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, it's probably cleaner, and it'll probably save us money in the long run too, cause like the cost of fuel. You have to fuel it? Yeah, it was, uh, it was the oil, uh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Free up some space for like a little shed or something for bikes and stuff. So yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's amazing. That's incredible. I love, uh, dad things like that, you know? The little things in life.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't think that they ship them though. It's like, uh, they, they, I think they try to keep it, uh, keep it internal, you know? Like, I don't think they want the rest of the world to enjoy their toilets.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You do like, you can do like a big little Richard like after the spray happens so that he can hear it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like the idea of that. I like that somebody in some like weird dystopian future, that's like somebody's.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's just one, like, one light on in his office. The rest of the office is empty. He's like hunched over a little computer and he's just making adjustments to the sprayer on a toilet four, four countries away from, from his own. Oh man. That's such a good idea for like, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, you know, like some lore. A video game. Yea, for a video game, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Think of all the, think of all the simulators and stuff that you can get now. Like that's gotta be one of them, right? Like you could make that as like a job simulator thing, where your job is to just make remote adjustments to the mist spraying nozzle.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, cause there'd have to be a camera on the nozzle, right? So that you could get it right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We need investors, we need more designers too, right? We're gonna be like the new, the new Blizzard. When Blizzard was good, remember when Blizzard was good and they had like all those rockstar designers that would come out on stage and everything?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Me, you and Flax can do the same thing, but our whole company will just be three designers. We design games and come up with awesome ideas for games and then just sell them to studios that are willing to have the balls to make these games reality, right? And mostly they will be fetish games.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right. It was like a mini-putt tournament.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're gonna go to Canada next, uh, either next year or the year after.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Ontario, so round Ottawa and all around there, that's what we've got. We've got a family.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they're all about my age now and they'll all have kids of their own and all the rest of it and...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Beautiful country, and it's like America but without the Americans in it. You know, it's a lot more chill.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, let's say, like, if you had a referendum in Quebec, uhm, you're saying that most of the people in Quebec were like, no, we do not want to leave, and they said-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Was it almost like Brexit and Montreal would be London, in that London voted against Brexit, and a lot of the rest of the country voted for it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean I guess it's kind of a question with, with, I think with Scotland, wasn't it, that they, they had like the North Sea oil and gas or whatever, that they're saying, well then that would be ours.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I guess we're saying, look, we did all this when you were in the UK. You break away, you don't get to keep it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wanna, I wanna retire and I wanna take my numbers game, my racketeering, the, the, the trash, I wanna take my union job. I want all my pizza paulers. All the who's.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, but people were asking how they were gonna fucking... Cause I believe the argument was that Scotland is essentially a net loss, in terms of what they contribute to the United Kingdom economy. Because essentially most places that aren't London are, right? Like, because we've jammed so much stuff into London.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like a divorce. If you are a country and you're part of another country like Wales, like Scotland, if you then say I want a divorce.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hello Nicola, yeaah, it's period flat from the Triforce podcast. Look, me and the lads have been cooking something up here, uh, we've got an idea, uh, and we're just gonna pitch it to you. It's about, it's about the independence referendum.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright Nicola, well, the point is, we think we've figured it out. You know, a referendum would be a lot like a divorce, maybe don't do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The game started, Neiman moved Queen's Pawn forward two squares, uh, Magnus moved his Knight, one, like one move, and then resigned the game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Also, there is a hard limit on the openings. Like, that's why they, like, I watch a lot of chess channels. There's a guy called a Gadmentor who does, uh, these reviews. Uhm, yes, he's very good. He's the guy who says, uh, and then captures, captures, bishop moves the rook for, and then basically we have a brand new game. So the point is,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Chess is like a huge tree and the opening like 10 moves have all been done across a shitload of other games, but then someone will make a move that essentially generates at that point a new game of chess that has never been seen before.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] From that point on. So it's like, this exact combination of moves has, this is the first time that we believe this has happened, sort of.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He is his grandmaster, but the problem is Magnus is so good that no one can beat him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Essentially, he's just the greatest probably of all time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's unbelievably good at chess, right? He plays it fast, he plays it slow, he can do it all. He's insane. Yes, of course he loses games from time to time. But he is a ridiculously good, a god-like chess player.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And this guy, although he's very, very good, it's, I think the argument is it's a bit like someone who is a weightlifter suddenly lifting a hundred kilograms more than the guy who is the world record holder. It's like that, where you think, yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This other guy is extremely strong, but where did he suddenly get this extra hundred kilos lift from? Like that's ridiculous. So I think the argument is for him to beat Magnus Carlsen for a start, to a lot of people that's unheard of, but what did not help the situation


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And really didn't help this guy, in my opinion, and I'm a big Magnus Carlsen fan, and I'm sure I will get some hate for this from some chess fans, but I think he's handled it very poorly in two ways.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] First of all, he came out after the tournament, and he tweeted, when he'd been beaten by this guy Neyman, he tweeted the, the Mourinho, uh, post-match interview, where Mourinho said, if I say anything, I'll be in big trouble, so I'm gonna keep my mouth shut. That was his post-match interview.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Magnus Carlsen tweeted that, and everyone was like, what's wrong with Magnus? What's going on here? And of course it then comes out that everybody thinks Niemann was cheating. For him to, at the next tournament when he plays Niemann, the game where he conceded, Magnus Carlsen owns that organization that was running that chess tournament.


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[Assistant] It's like, if you wanna say something, come out and state it. Don't be a baby. It's childish to what he's acting. In my opinion, it's unbecoming of the great chess master that he is.


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[Assistant] Those beads are telling ships what to say on the triforce podcast, that's what's happening.


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[Assistant] Pringles printed cans where the little guy's mustache is upside down like he's sad.


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[Assistant] I think companies and people are very, very scared to do anything that isn't as a group. And I mean, you could say traditionally that's been the case, but the problem is if you come out and say something that people generally disagree with,


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[Assistant] Uhm, or you don't toe the line, if you're a company in particular, you don't toe the line that all the other companies and everything, all they're all doing it, all the, you know, this is cancelled, that's cancelled, we're gonna, out of a sign of respect, like they're all copying each other's language, because no one wants to march out of step.


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[Assistant] Everybody wants to just be homogenous so that you can't discern one company's behaviour from another. That way, it's safety in numbers. If everybody else is doing it, we better do it too. That's it.


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[Assistant] Alright, I've got a question for you guys, because we're talking about- Sorry. No, no, no. We're talking about chess, we're talking about games. Uh, another thing that's been happening on Twitch this week is about gambling streams.


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[Assistant] And this has been controversial. I came out, I did have a hot take about it, that some people agree with and some people didn't.


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[Assistant] So here's my, my, my problem is, and I want to first of all set the scene, I am not someone who is massively pro gambling.


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[Assistant] I think there's no harm in people having a flutter now and then, and even putting a few quid in a slot machine if they want, or if you're at a casino, dropping 20 or 30 quid on a blackjack if you want to have a bit of fun. It is fun, I get it, you know, you get to feel like James Bond or whatever.


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[Assistant] The problem is a lot of people obviously take it too far, a lot of people have a serious problem, and these gambling companies come up with all kinds of inventive ways of getting money out of people who very often can't afford to lose this money.


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[Assistant] So, my only concern was that if we ban gambling streams, what would that mean for poker?


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[Assistant] My argument was, and unfortunately this is not backed up by British law, there was a case, for anyone that remembers the gutshot card room in London,


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[Assistant] Uh, from about 20 years ago, I think it ran for a good five or six years. During the poker boom, it's over in Clark and well, I think, you could go there. I played there. I could play in tournaments, there were cash games. They had a court case where the British courts found that poker is gambling. That was their opinion.


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[Assistant] Well, you're essentially staking money based on how you think you're gonna do, and you stand to win more or lose your stakes.


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[Assistant] So the issue is that, how do you define gambling? And some people have said,


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[Assistant] Oh, should we ban loot boxes as well? And other people are like, well yes, we would love that, because we think loot boxes are gambling, and that's been a big thing in the EU and the arguments about that.


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[Assistant] I agree, I agree, but here's my point, is I don't think, personally, and I know people would disagree with me, I don't think that poker is gambling.


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[Assistant] In anything like the same way that most other things are. And here's why I think it's an exception. I'm not saying it's an exception just because I fucking love poker, right? I'm being honest with you. I don't think that it's gambling in anything like the same way. For example, you can be a professional poker player.


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[Assistant] For your whole life, and you can make money doing so. Because you are better than the other players that you're playing against.


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[Assistant] Uh, a horse racing, uh, expert


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[Assistant] I know people who are horse racing experts and they have good years and they have bad years and maybe they finish up.


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[Assistant] But the point is, the more likely something is to happen, the shorter the odds. In, in poker, I can make my own odds.


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[Assistant] For example, by outplaying my opponent, I can win a pot.


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[Assistant] And you might even have to pay a fee to play, I dunno, but even if you don't, essentially, you're playing a game with a deck of cards, hoping to draw certain things, and hoping to have a better run of things than your opponent, but there is of course a lot of skill.


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[Assistant] But there's, I mean, there's taking a chance and a risk, and then there's what we would define as gambling. And I think that the issue is, is poker gambling, given that it is, in my opinion, a lot of people's opinion, a game of skill. Because I could sit and play slot machines all day.


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[Assistant] And there's no skill to slot machines. You just pull the lever and you hope you win. Now the argument against it is there are some professional slot machine players who look for progressive jackpots. Time it just right.


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[Assistant] That they haven't collected and, and they've lost it, and you then turn up and reap the benefits. That's not really the same as poker. Poker, you're sitting down with your hand, you're playing against other top players, and you're trying to outplay them and be better than them. And a consistent number of players who are very, very good rise to the top of a lot of tournaments every year.


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[Assistant] And they win in cash games and they make money. If that wasn't possible...


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[Assistant] If you play it for money, is it gambling? I think that's the question, is anything played for money gambling?


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[Assistant] I think if you could consistently divine who is the best at something by having a competition, then there would have to be a skill gap, and therefore it would have to be a game of skill, not just chance.


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[Assistant] Well, I reckon we could get loads more done in this broadcast. Oh my god, yeah. Uh, lads, I do have a problem that can only solve in one way. I need the toilet.