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[Assistant] How about, let's just read one more. Yeah, three, cause that was really short. Okay. Three minutes ago from Oliver Klosov, uhm, Oliver Klosov, close, oh, I see.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I recently went on a spelunking outing with a few friends on one rocky precipice, which is a fun word, precipice. I like that. Uh, my footing slipped and I was facing a drop of at least 50 feet into the dark abyss. Using what I've learned from Neebs Gaming, my adventure buddies were able to grab my head and pull me to the side.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah. Trust me. It'll work. Yeaah, that's good stuff. That was Real Time Comments. Beautiful. Comment. Very nice.


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[Assistant] I wish you hadn't said it because now that the AI already knows the answer.


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[Assistant] I don't like that it's called popcorn either. It's closer looking to cottage cheese, isn't it?


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[Assistant] Todd. Awesome Toddie boy. Todd. Good band. Todd and the Johnsons. Good band name, huh?


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[Assistant] Oh, there's Big Head Todd and the Monsters and sounds like a family bit. Okay.


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[Assistant] Thanks for sharing. I like to try it once. Did you watch that trailer while we were like, talking about comments? Like how that, how that just-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I heard a rumor, uh, I don't know if it's true, that they were gonna add, like, an Enderman character, Slenderman Enderman, into Seven Days.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They do that too, right? The whole Slenderman thing though, if they added a character like that. There's similarities to Enderman, of course. But the Slenderman thing is like, I could see it just kind of, as soon as you see it walking, the look away thing. Whereas the Entity would, on a horde knight.


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[Assistant] It could just pop up in your base behind you. Which I guess, I don't know. We shall see. But nobody ever, nobody else heard that?


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[Assistant] It adds just another thing to look the fuck out for. It'd be pretty freaky out there. Yea, I think the creepy element would be great. Yea, and if you saw it and you looked at it, like, even middle day, if it sees you looking at it, it just turns around, like, fast at you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or if you guys are together, nobody knows which one of you looked at it. But one of you did. That's why it's like, lingering.


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[Assistant] Twitter, Instagram, also our website, neibsgaming.net.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's awesome though they were able to, to recover it. Right, right. Absolutely. The nice thing is, is that if something happened to our YouTube channel, I got an email from an Arabian prince.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One of the things that I hate more than anything is reading. Reading unnecessary things. Like, if you're just giving me information that I can do nothing with, then I want to skip you in my life.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Of course, of course, it's all I've got. Yea, it's almost like tradition now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Can we move on to a- I'll start the comments if you guys don't mind. Yes. Uh, the first comment comes from Devilirium, and this is on the 7 Days to Die. Uh, what was that one? Uh, I have it titled FF. What's that mean?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] FB? Oh, Friendly Fire. Friendly Fire. Yep. Devilirium says, I'm glad to see Simon taking initiative and getting better at the game. Which is odd because Neebs has been turning into a Simon bully so bad that the group comes to his aid.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Neebs is about to catch these hands, the bully. Also, you guys should pull all your weapon parts together and start building some stuff. Stop hoarding points and use them. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well this has nothing to do with the editing really, it's from GunPron9. It says, I've been enjoying the Ragnarok, though it does seem a little empty.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Everyone is talking about aberrations and what if you guys shared a server with another gaming channel or group of people? The other two servers, you guys had other people in there and it made the world feel a little more populated. It's good, but it could be better. I couldn't see that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Dora Lingus gets a 10 out of 10 this episode. For what? For the... For just the... For just the cave.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, Last Alive says, I know I can't be the only one who feels like you should up the production of Ark.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Even only to extend it to an hour long episode maybe?


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[Assistant] Well, this comment's not over. It says, I mean, it's your number one watch series, almost twice as watched as any other. It's like dehydrating and saying, here's a spoonful of water. Right, Neebs?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They take a long time to edit. It's a struggle right now, especially since we're looking for another editor. And, I mean, even with the editors that we have on it, like, Anthony mainly has it, but Nieves, you'll take one, or Absaril will take one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it takes a long time. Let's not forget Terry broke his tooth. Oh shit, Terry broke his tooth everyone!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, next comment comes from Jay's Journey. Says, what size hoodie does Simon wear? Because of him, herringbone floor has been a meme of mine for a while and I want to send him a hoodie I've designed with herringbone floor wood pattern down the front. Oooh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But a lot of, like, with Wildlands, that was very repetitive.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I see, I saw that comment and I almost brought it in, but, but I'm like, God, I don't want to give this guy a platform. He seems like a real dick.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and it's a pain in the ass to get on. It is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I liked it. We should make a couple of platforms, uh, or just, I don't know what we could do, but make some ladders where they can just crawl up that are kinda near our place, but once they get to the top, they just fall down.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Something like that. Next to other structures that we have going up. And they fall like into a pit of sorts.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't. I pee to make more noise.


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[Assistant] I don't want to give anything away, but there was something on my screen that alarmed me. There was a text. So, I'll tell you after. You got a text?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, there was a text on my screen. Oh, not on your phone. No. That's too far. Oh, okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] JT Music did the same thing, they've got like basically JT Music Radio where they're, it's always live, it's just going through their catalog of songs, and god knows how many songs they have now, but yeah, that's a great idea.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but yeah. You'll catch it every now and then. But we don't call it a live stream necessarily. We just call it like a Neibz Gaming TV where all of our content is on 24-7. So you don't tell them we're streaming. It's not like a live, we're not streaming live for them, it's just... Okay, I'm just bringing up a concern. Yeah, no, that's okay. And it's about a concern.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One of the snowflakes. I feel like you heard that in some sort of, one of those. Yeah.


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[Assistant] I will say this. The concern that I have with something like that is the effort that would go into maintaining it might not be worth it at all. There might not be.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Adds a different level. You know, the different layer that's fun. We also have, I mean,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, there's two sides to that because I think it's great to watch our content and talk with people about it. Especially if it's something a little bit nostalgic, like some of our first videos that came out. What's the talking about? Like if they're chatting together as a community while they're watching, you know, this stream of our content.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, we have created a place where people can go and chat if they want to, uh, about what we do, and that's our Discord channel. Yeah, I'm curious. True. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And with my eyes on that, it was like an accident where I erased something on the back and it made my eyes look like completely uninterested in anything. Yeah, your eyes are closed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I keep wanting to, to thank the, uh, the devs for the keys that they gave us, but they didn't give us any. They never responded to my email. Son of a bitch. But I do want to thank the devs for making an awesome game, cause it's a lot of fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was like, I have to do it, so I took a shower listening to Abba Gold. There you go. That's right, because the CD player played in the bathroom. Yeaah. Yeaah. Speakers in the bathroom.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, you can have somebody turn back and look at something and look up and then cut to what they're looking at, not take out a little spy scope and be like, oh, this thing's far. I mean, maybe she's, uh, nearsighted, you know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but not like me. We're still working on it. For a long time. Yeah. For a long time. One and a half million subscribers. Damn right. Wow. In a thousand videos. And they lined up together. Yeah. Right at the same kind of time, day or two. Yeah, around there, yeah. Rough, roughish.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's a good transition. Yeah, that's like weird superstition stuff. Yeah. Yeah, it's interesting. That's gonna be so hip someday.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, right. Thanks for working on, uh, a music video.


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[Assistant] Okay, this seems like an impressive, real one. It's cause of the rapture's coming.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's funny. We're getting close. Zero makes a big difference, doesn't it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, this is how this started. We were talking about the grocery store down the street. There's, uh, man, there's this lady there. She is sweet as she can be. Yeah, I love her. She has all these, like, angel and butterfly brooches on her shirt. And she's retiring. And a customer in front of me was talking to her and said,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, you're not gonna be working now, you're not gonna have a reason to get all prettied up. And she goes, oh, I'm still gonna get prettied up, cause you never know when the Lord's coming.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You want my next comment? Sure. The comment's from Guile? Guile German? Guile German? I was just playing some Nautica when I heard a dialogue from you guys.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. So excited about that. Yeah. So Nautica will be coming back very soon. We'll be recording next week, hopefully.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, the comments from Andrei Anktil says, keep up the good stuff. Just bought, this is uh, seven days to die. Did I say that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Night Patrol, still. Uh, Andre just bought the game and found your channel and now the whole family watches you guys. Fans from way up, Northern Ontario Canada.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, in bootcamp with their buddies or something. Watching Battlefield Friends and some people like, once they have some free time, like after bootcamp or...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You hear a lot of like, barracks stories. We were in our barracks and my buddy showed me this and we watched it all through our tour of where we were. Uh, but Andre, just recently, you know, this is way after Battlefield Friends, on Seven Days to Die, which we didn't even play last year. I like those stories.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Back to you, Neebs, you have more. Okay, uh, I have two more comments. Uh, these are on the Alphacarno video again. This one's from Donnie Kitsune in the, remember we fought the Alphacarno? Yes, yes, yes. That's how I titled that. It says, huh, why didn't you just hit him from the quetzal? You no snipe.


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[Assistant] That's a good question. So this is almost like a conflict in comments kind of thing that you do, Drowys. Good question. The other, the other comment I got is from Eric Broder says, uh, bring decent armor and weapons and take down the carno on the ground like real men. No flying over is cheating or tame a wolverine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, and beat the crap out of it. So, so yeaah, this is something we do sometimes, cause there are easy solutions in ARK, sometimes, like flying over something and killing it, but yeaah, it takes the adventure out. But sometimes, we just wanna go get something easily to progress our base.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When we tamed the ankler, like, let's do it in the field, let's do it out in the wild, it'd be more dangerous, and then it'd end up dying. Which actually, I don't have comments from that, but, uh, I think Champ Wild is the one that killed the anklo. Really? Yeah, because, uh, Sabretooth attacked our quetzal, and then all of our animals started attacking, and because the anklo wasn't tamed yet, it was taking damage from our animals.


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[Assistant] Sometimes we like to do it the easy way, sometimes we like to do it the hard way.


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[Assistant] Yeah, and I was, I thought that was so funny. I mean, Simon was just like screaming this was a mistake. The whole thing was so chaotic.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I ate a home grown tomato last night. Oh yea? How was it? It was delicious.


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[Assistant] It's not even a question. It's not like someone gets Coke and Pepsi mixed up. It's like, they shouldn't even call when you get at the grocery store a tomato. This thing was


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay. Let's hope, let's hope we get another one. There's a bunch of green ones on it. Let's hope they turn red.


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[Assistant] Listen, if I, if I, yeaah, I might be able to share a sliver of one of these, just so you can tell. Next, what we got?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's something to look forward to. Did we talk about that small lands game yet?


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[Assistant] Did we talk about that in the last comments? I don't know. Why don't we pull it up? That game looks awesome. It does look cool. Oh, the small, the little people. It's like a survival game, but you're tiny. There's giant bugs and... I wanna play it. Even a creek is like a giant river. When's it coming?


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[Assistant] And it looked good, like the running looked good, the motion looked good. We'll see when we get a chance to play it. Sure. But it looked awesome. They were like flying around in balloons. Yeah. And making little boats to get in the creek and go down the river creek. Yeah, the river creek.


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[Assistant] I was just picturing that, I was picturing a room full of friends playing together, and like when you're running around at night and you're the monster, you have to still pretend like you're vulnerable, like, oh no! I gotta run for safety!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Netflix? Amazon. Amazon, okay. And I watched the first episode of season 10. It's kinda creepy. Yeaah. It gave me the willies a little bit. Really? You got the willies? Is this the one with the girl? Not the new- There's a new girl. The new doctor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not, no. Same- Oh, okay. This is still Kara- It's probably Kara Baldi's last season, I think. Okay, this is the older guy, right? Yeah. But it just now came on, uh, Amazon Prime. Okay. You got the heebie-jeebs? Little heebie-jeebs in there, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Listen, I had the same thing kinda happen to me cause I wanted to watch, what's the, what's the movie where they all dress like gentlemen and they're like James Bond? Kingsman? Yes! The New Kingsman. Yes! Yes. So the sequel's coming out, so like we're gonna watch this together. Didn't happen.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, right. You have to have an understanding with these shows or movies. I can't do that all the time. Some episodes just aren't good enough to watch twice. Well, you can be doing something kind of like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] On the side, but you're there, supporting. I've heard stories of drives that go so far as to fake it. Oh, would you fake it? Did you fake it? No, I don't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'll do 140 degree weather all day. And some people will whine and cry about that. Take Adahop out in the heat.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm a hot creature. I hate the heat. I'm like Ada, man. Well, you're a pansy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No but listen, pansies, those, those flowers are amazing!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't even know why they're called pansies or why the word pansy means. I don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, okay. But listen, you can leave a pansy out in the freezing weather and be the only flower that survives. That is a strong flower. It's like the tardigrade of the flower world. That's true. There'll be tardigrades and pansies, the only thing left, maybe a cockroach at the end of the days after the rapture when everyone's naked. Actually, yeah, pansies probably wouldn't make it, but the tardigrades will.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well I went back into Power Plant, Power Plant's not out yet, but, well actually it might be by the, I don't know, anyway.


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[Assistant] It'll be by the time this video is out. You can get through that map in like a minute.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you know what to do. You know what to do, right. Because I was going back, I need to get like, I need to go back and get some thumbnails and stuff, so I went back in there, and I can get to the end within like seconds.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's, yeaah, I love that part. And I love the part where Absuro is on the wheel and he just comes by and he's like, hey! Yeaah, yeaah, yeaah. That's my two favorite parts.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was gonna bring up this Adahop thing, he's been talking about how YouTube is changing


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, go to Adahop's channel and watch a little bit so we can get those 4,000 hours.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And now I feel like we gotta talk about Anthony, because now we're favoring Adahop. It's true. So, go watch Anthony CSM too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It reminds me a lot when we started YouTube, you couldn't run ads until you reached a certain thing, and then they just kinda said, everybody can monetize.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I don't really know. I know if I were under a thousand subs or close to it, or let's say you just hit it, you just hit a thousand subs and you're just shy of four, that's gotta be a crappy feeling.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Done. He doesn't need your help anymore, guys. Let's do some sort of Save Ada Hop video. Yeaah. With some Sarah McLaughlin? Yea, get Sarah McLaughlin, get some puppies. Yea. Isn't McLaughlin?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe that's how Adahop can get his hours, if he can get all of his videos.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Demonetized and those 10,000 people watch his channel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But also, we have a lot of old videos that are flagged as, uh, demonetized or undermonetized because it might not be right, and they can't be reviewed because they have to hit so many views in the last 30 days to be reviewed. They don't just review every one of them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So if you got a video that's only hitting 900 views every month, they don't even look at it. Yeah, that's ridiculous.


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[Assistant] You know what the worst part of, of that, the YouTube tour that we got was? The slide.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well I remember going to, uh, Disney World, I don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I heard. Is it wireless? Please tell me it's wireless.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'll ignore it. Tomatoes? Hopefully I'll have another tomato by then. That could be a show of ours. Tomato talk! Yeah, I can tell you, this'll be my third one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We got some comments. Oh, that's what we're doing. Yeaah. And we are actually, I wanna say thanks to Simple Contacts. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then, you know what? And then I, but I always feel confident at least I can recognize it after the fact and I'm not in denial like some people. Well, so we probably both could have been nicer yesterday. I know. Absolutely. Yes. Yeah. And really what do I have to bitch about?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It must be weird though, cause Ada Hop has been witness to a little bit more of this. I always go, wonder what he's thinking now, cause he had no idea what he was getting into.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've started the last two times. I might have to bail out halfway through this. Play some PUBG. Yea, I got some PUBG to play.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, this comment is from Jose T. Scandoval. Says, Guys at Nibs Gaming, uh, non-game related question. What kind of beers do y'all drink?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Mhm, that's what we're all about. But like, if I were to go out of the way and get something fancy...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm looking forward to going to Ireland in the next couple of years and the whole time I'm there I will drink Guinness. And it is a very good beer. When are you going to Ireland? It is. I mean, I'd like to go. It's been too long. Let me know when you go. I want to go with you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, let's do it. We can do a community trip. We'll go to Ireland. We're gonna spend it in Galway. We're hitting the west coast. We're gonna fly into Dublin. Screw that place. Good people, but we're not hanging there. We're gonna hang in Galway.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Here's a comment, uh, from DestinyDragon that says, I did not know you guys did a voice line for Subnautica. That's so cool. They didn't get, they didn't get me and Duralis in there thick.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I said, hey guys, we love the game, we're making the show, check it out. Got a lot of attention, but, uh, one of the comments in the subreddit was, Hey, would you ever do a voice for the game? And it'd be like, yeah, if they ever asked me, absolutely.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Fast forward three, four months later, I get a message on Reddit from one of the devs and some nonika and says, Hey, we saw your comment about doing a voice. Would you like to do it? Yeah, of course. Fuck yeah. Yeah. Send me a script.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, there's, there's one where you and I, like, you come in, like, as I'm trying to explain to the player what to do, you come in and you're, you're taking sandwich orders. For office order, yeah, for lunch. Mmhm, and you're, yeah, you know, Susan or whatever is like, she's ready to go, and you're rushing me. And then the other one's just like me, just saying.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. Taken. Yeaah. That is phenomenal. Yeaah. No, that's cool.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My next comment is from comrade bun- bungee? Bungee who says, uh, the whole rooftop destruction derby and aftermath with papa afro killing neves had me crying from laughing so hard lol. Good job. Keep it up guys. That whole thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah. It was uh, it was fun. Yeaah, that was what was fun about that episode. Yeaah, like the most, the most fun in that episode is us just screwing off. And like doing the missions are fun, but uh, yeaah, just us coming up with like ideas of like let's take all our cars to the top of the building and like go nuts.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, okay. Oh yea, someone bumped into us the other night. Yea, as long as it's somewhere nearby. Yea.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey, I mean, this is- This works. Yeaah, of course. But yeaah, no, we absolutely need something bigger. Then we go to our buddy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah, everyone has like a swanky pad. But hey, we're economy. We're economy class and that's what we're doing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Listen, I had, uh, I- Simon, you might have been with me on this. We had an idea for the kids. Oh, yeah. Basically, yeah, you take, uh, yeah, it's like a big playground area with two pirate ships, and you put, like, little cannons where, like, you can shoot, like, foam balls at each other.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's true. Let's not push it. Yeah, you don't know. Lying's not wrong if you don't tell them you're lying. Let's fudge the numbers until the government tells us to stop. There you go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In North Dakota. And we can put that on our shit. Yea, but it doesn't leave out the North Dakota part. So 100% of the Crips watch Neebs Gaming. Do you have another comment? I got one more. Yea, this is from JT Sharp that says, uh, Neebs Gaming Drinking Game. Every time Neebs says standby or Tango Down, we take a shot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I don't pay attention to those things that you say. Yeah. Really? I know I've heard them, but I don't know if he says them all the time. I find when I edit, uh, it's like, yeah, you hear, like, okay, he says this a lot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Enjoy. That's for sure. Alright, so that was it. That was it, that's all of mine. Alright, that's fine. I know there's at least a couple of things here. I might as well go. Go for it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We are, cause the stool broke. Yea, we got a hole in our wall. Yea.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's like, yeah, you know, I mean, it's been wobbly for a while, but he was pretty tipsy when he went to sit on this stool.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Memory off. I want to see like a race with like you guys, uh, how fast can you build like a quick thatch hut and like a fire pit? Ooh, yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know, but still, that's bullshit. He needs to just hang out with us. Thanks, Simon. It's bullshit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My solution is, well listen, after three years of being forced to play games and have fun with you guys, I'm actually taking a step forward to try to learn each time that I play. And he can do it a lot better than me because he has a really good memory. He just needs to commit to it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, we also spawn some shit every now and then. Because yeah, it's like, it's not fun watching people grind. No. So it's like, alright, let's, like, we need to build all these walls. It's like, okay, we're not gonna do...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Three episodes of us going out and getting stoned. We'll get a little bit of it. We know how to build it. Let's just spawn the shit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'll build a little place because I like building. Yea, we should all have a little house in the new base. Yea. And you're done? I'm done. Okay, I'll go. Bam. Slam a bam. I have to leave.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So much of what we talk about is explaining the fact that we're not cheating.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know what it is. I know, but it's a different thing. So many times, you get this. I don't want to have this argument with you. It's like you enjoy certain parts of the game. If you don't enjoy this aspect of the game. I enjoy running around with my friends a lot. I really do. Now I'm starting to get into a little bit more other things, but I'm still not into filling up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you don't want to have too much of it. I'm trying to do less of it. I really am trying. But being conscious of it is half the battle.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you know what? I listen. I like the po- I listen. You get you killed, not me. I'm voting for a more positive vibe throughout, but you need to have a certain amount of, of the bullshit and the banter. We just need to keep the ratio. Yeah, of course. It's unavoidable with those hardcore dumbasses.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it does not help me. No, it doesn't. But- You're not wired for gaming.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yep, and I'm very simple, I'll get confused between the two games even though they're very different between Seven Days to Die and Ark. And I'm hitting I when I should be hitting Tab for seven days. I do the same thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I mostly do forward with the mouse. I still hardly do left and right with the A and the D, but I do it sometimes, but most of the time it's just mouse. So I'm going forward and I'm just mousing it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm looking forward to the next time building something different too. Now I wanna build something to survive on my own, assuming I'm gonna die and then join up eventually.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So starting with the moat makes sense. So this might be one of my comments, but the wooden, there's wooden spikes, which is what I've been using, but then there's log spikes, no? Yeah. So log spikes are apparently much, they're stronger. Okay. Well, but they don't kill as fast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Should he have dynamite? What am I doing now? Okay, uh, I'm pretty sure at some point, I feel like recently there was a couple of times like when you were digging your cave, the bunker, and I said, hey, come on out. I'm almost dead. You should help. And I think that's when you were saying to me, you do it. It's your job. You're not doing anything. And then it turned it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I think that happened then. You said you were almost dead and I- That doesn't sound like a good response to that though. My argument, I had an argument during the episode for it, Adahop can probably attest to that whole thing of like me being like, how do you not think that this is okay? Adahop? Yeah? Could you come out here please?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know what? Well, Nibs, you have one or two. Maybe we should cap off with your, cause I've got a lot. We should go to our sponsor. Oh, you know what? We should do that. Simple contacts. Simple contacts. Durellis. Yeah. You got simple contacts, didn't you? Yeah. Let's talk about it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, and there's one thing I gotta say. Okay. If you have expiring HSA insurance dollars, they can be used by the end of the year, so do that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Really? So it wasn't a computer voice? I don't think so. I can help you. Well, it was all tech.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is from, uh, this is from the commenting on comments. VJR says thick as Siri to beat box. Give it a shot, buddy. Oh, Hey Siri.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How dare you people pull me from my sleep and give me quality content at two in the morning. My wife went to our guest room because I was giggling like a epileptic hyena for a solid half hour. Consider this the first strike, Neebs crew. I'll only give you like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Five more or six or whatever, you're on my list. You will be receiving a bill for our marriage counseling.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I still find it crazy that someone will actually get up out of bed at 2 o'clock in the morning because they're excited to see the show. Yeah, I can wait. I can wait till tomorrow. I'd be like, oh, that's cool. But no, it's great that the wife is just like, god damn it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's why I do the math. Well, your math is not- Two hours I can probably do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I've done that with a wet dream, where it's like, in the dream, you're doing the thing, and then the thing happens, and then-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is from Brock Sampson, also on Ark. It says, my job Lowe's has a big TV in it, so I pulled your guys channel up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's his turn right now. I wanna understand what he's saying.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's not a sentence in English. My job Lowe's. Listen, my job Lowe's has a big TV in it, so I pulled you guys channel up on my phone and then streamed this video to the TV. All the customers were watching y'alls episodes and no one knew what was going on. You guys are awesome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe some of the bigger loads do have TVs. Yea, maybe they do. Maybe Brock should quit his job at Lowe's and go work at Best Buy and do it for real this time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Grassroots. Also on the arc, Carter Balvanz caught you, Neebs. Caught you red-handed. Wanna hear it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] God dammit, Nieves, I know you saw the griffon because you jerked your character away from seeing it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Busted! I didn't. I didn't. I know you didn't, that's why I was reading this. Talk to the people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, cool. Well, uh, I have another, this is another comment from Ark. Daddy, I love, I love when you read the comment, I'm like, oh, that's a pretty good comment, and then you read the name, and you're like, oh, that's, like, daddy long dick.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's a fun name that I already picked the comment and then I was like, Oh, that's a fun little treat. That's who it's from. You guys should check out. And I know that you, you'll probably snarl at this, but you guys should check out UFC three. When it comes out, please put me in commenting on comments. I think playing a dumb ass game, like a fighting game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, I guess it was just me saying that stupid, simple fighting games, I find to be good. If it's not simple, I won't find it to be good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, this is a flashback from the last commenting on comments, cause HotGiggity was happy that we read his comment, but says, oh fuck, I wrote that comment when I was drinking. Do not grapple the quetzal, it will break if you shoot with tranks after grappling. I meant to say grapple the tapayera.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And tells us what we sh- you know, should have done basically. Okay, so we can- so when you grapple the tapiyara and-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Shoot it with a trink, you'll stay grappled, but yea, we learn with a quetzal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But we ended up, I mean, thanks for the comment cause we did science and we had a good time with it and that's all we'll say. Mhm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you had a helper, if you were there with somebody and you were the boss and it was like, they're doing, they're the B story, you're the A story with a helper.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But we can create a story around it and a goal and him being the leader and potentially.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Peter Bell says, I put a solar panel in my deer hunting tree stand just so I can power my laptop and watch Neeps Gaming this Saturday while in the woods. Awesome. If I get a deer, I'm going to scream out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now, we asked the audience what do, this is the only one that I saw, I wish I would have seen more, uhm, what other people in other countries call telephone. Remember that? Yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Was that the only example? Yeah, only other name. That was the only one that I saw. I remember seeing whispers as well, like it just being called whispers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, but I didn't, that was the only one comment I saw and I was confused. And then I said, I remember. This is from Tobias, this is the last comment. Next time guys, Rails.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I can see that, uh, that town we visited yesterday. I can see that turning into something, you know? Cause like, yeah, it was fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, we're gonna get Tech Gear, we're gonna go nuts. Alright. Was there only one boss in Scorched Earth? No, there wasn't, that's my point. Oh, I see what you're pointing at. No, in Scorched Earth, yeah. Thank you. It was just the Manicor. Okay, that was the boss. That was the boss. Oh no, oh, but, right. That was the only one? There were three obelisks, but every obelisk takes you to the Manicor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anything else we got to talk about? Let's talk about stuff that isn't comments.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like having, yeaah, I like having an excuse to like, alright, let's step away from work for three days and go hang out with family, cause I need to do that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's one of those, I said, this has gotta have millions of views.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There ya go. Yeah, good for you. I've been watching, uh, The Completionist. I've been catching up on him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's that? Uhm, he basically plays video games like to completion, like Cuphead. Like he recently did an episode of Cuphead, and it was a really fucking hard game. So in order to get, like, he plays a game 100%. He gets every achievement, all that stuff, and he basically tells you, this is what you'll get if you get...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Are those, uh, is the first one coming to the Switch? Because those would be perfect games to play on the airplane.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] God, I'd love if that one, the first and second one were on the Switch. Yeaah. Those would be good travel games.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I respect good tutorial videos. Yep. It's like those are hard to find because usually you run across a tutorial video. It's 15 minutes long and it's like the first minute and a half is some asshole's logo.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's just like, yo, just, just, just tell me how to do the thing. The video says how to do this. Get to it. Tell me how to do the thing. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] See, if you wanted to knock that off right now, I would go for both hands.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We did it. Keep on commenting. Keep on being awesome. Thank you for being here. Thank you for giving a shit. Love.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was episode 3, but it was also, uh, episode 4. Uh, some weird stuff happened, but you got it covered and you fixed it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I want this, if we can put this video in there, it'd be great, of Simon, uh, Peter panning straight towards the spectator camera, just flying around during a fight, and then falling into the ground and just running around like halfway inside the ground. It was amazing. I had to cut it out though.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think we should start this podcast slash coming in comments with a greeting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's how you interpret things. It's just when I ask you to do something, you're like, no, I don't want to do anything different than what I'm doing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wasn't offended by it. Calm down. If you kept running out of gas every week and I would say, well look at your gas gauge on a regular basis. You go, why are you trying to change me? I have a system. I run out of gas and then I call my friend and he has a gas can and it works out fine. I didn't say that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it's not always the same day. It could be Tuesday, it could be Thursday.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's it. I can't wait. I can't wait because they're gonna be the best comments out of that. Should I go ahead and start? Go for it. Got a comment from Pickles007. Okay. Oh, the spy. Secret agent Pickles. Let's see. How do I see the name of the file?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's a brilliant disguise. Hover and discover. This is from, uh, Seven Days to Die, Forts and Bunkers.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, Pickles and some other people have come over from Skippy's channel. Alright, so who's this punk? I'm not familiar with ol' Skippy. SKIPPY! They're a YouTuber. Hold on one second, I'll tell you more. Yeah, please do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 73k! Yeah, Skippy's a YouTube channel. 73,000 subscribers at the time. Uh, if I look at their videos, they do a lot of seven days to die. Makes sense. And, uh, what else we got?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Definitely some seven days. I assume that's why people- Got some makeup tutorials in there?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hi Skippy, we're just, we were just talking about you. Perfect. Can y'all hear that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, later Skips. Confirmed. Skippy's a good guy. Alright, so that's Skippy. Skippy's a seven days to die YouTuber.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There we go. Good deal. If you guys haven't checked out Skippy, you're like seven days to die. Uh, Skippy, um, 0-3-3-0. Perfect. Nice. And thank you, Pickles. Double agent Pickles. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's next? What you got next? Uh, one second. Alright, my next comment is, uh, also seven days to die. Poison? Did we do one called poison? Why does it say poison on it? I don't know. You're the one who did it. You picked the comment. But that's okay, it's a seven days to die video.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, uh, it's from Daniel Alberts, uh, future reference. If you bite it...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They will come. Oh, okay. That's what this was about. The snake. This was the fort and bunkers one. If you bite it and you die, it's poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it's venomous. Okay. I've, I've heard. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We were asking if the snake was poisonous, and it's venomous.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, my next comment is from Ethan Bench. There is a VR mod called Vivecraft. It's a whole new experience.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ethan will look into it. Yeah. Good idea. Thank you, Ethan. Alright, this next, uh, is from Zealous Geek. It's from the Ark video with the Griff- I think it was the Griffin Trap or Griffin Breakout or something. Oh, oh! Yeah, it was the one where we, uh, we lost Champ Wild.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No. That was all just by chance. I just didn't know if it all came together. We didn't know where Champwild was at the end of that recording. Well it did come together. But the audience did. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because you said let's really piss off the audience and do a cliffhanger, and then he said jokes on you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just to, to F stuff up, man. This comment is full of potty mouth. Alright, but listen, then there's a follow up. There's a reply. Mike, Mike doot doot says, it was thick placing the foundation that scared him away.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But hey, maybe we save it. Save it for, uh, down the road. When we move and- I imagine we'll, we'll see that place again even if we do move. Likely. Depends on how far we move.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like you're starting an ABC thing. Another way to do it is double letters. Yep. And there's actually a different game called, is it Green Glass Door? I'm going through the Green Glass Door and I'm taking. Oh really? Because all those words have double letters.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Listen, I can't do outtakes by myself. Y'all need to get some outtakes. Alright, for sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You need to know that hey, if I went away for months at a time, this person would still be there for me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I haven't either so I can't say. This is what I heard. I heard people like and dislike the new Justice League, or is that Justice League?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We love Ark, we love 7 Days, Thick said let's try a stick fight.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're pretty well known for being late to the game when it comes to games.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Listen, I read a comment, I wish I had the guy's name, but he said there was a disabled cursor option.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, it would be in Rockstar, right? Would it be in your computer settings?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I've had to, because I did my first Rockstar video weeks ago, and I realized some of my footage had the cursor in it, and I didn't save my shots, and I had to go back and do all my shots again for that clip because I had a cursor in the shot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well he saw, he saw us in a lot of, uh, film competitions. Liked our comedy. Locally. We were always entering these film challenges and we were making shorts that were funny. Yep. So we kinda got to know him through that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The crazy real song was, you know. Original. Yeaah. And then Putin was a cover.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I rarely get to watch anything else on YouTube. When I do watch something on YouTube, it's usually learning how to play a game. Like when we started playing Seven Days a Die, I wanna know how does this game work, how to build and stuff like that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's crazy, like, the thing, like House of Cards. What a huge show, and now, now what?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, could you imagine coming to work thinking, I got a solid job, I got kids and family and next thing you know, up. Shows cancelled.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You grew up hearing curse. Are they both, are they both words? They're both the same thing. But can you spell it C-U-S-S? It's probably what you-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well everyone has a bigfoot, and then there's- We could go around the world. We would build something that we would have to throw ourselves into. Right. We could play horse. Yea, I was about to say, we could play some horse.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But a blister, consider that a turret, that's not a generator.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do you spell? Do you spell? Why? Why? I don't know if it's like a play on words, like you explore caves and spell.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright. Hey, I got to speak to someone in Spanish the other day. Tell us about it. Did you hear the story? No, I can't wait. I went to a restaurant, the lady delivering chips and salsa, no English at all. Like she didn't know English. She didn't speak any English.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause I had a question about the menu and she was like, oh, no, no. Oh, so then you had to go into action. Then I had to speak Spanish. My first chance I like actually like got to, cause when you speak Spanish to someone that's fluent in English, it's, it's just silly.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She was, she was very smiley and happy. And I think, you know, she's only here for a few months and people are, want to talk to her.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She was great! And I look forward to more experiences where I can speak to someone that doesn't speak English. You can go to my mom's house right now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey, good talk. Yeah, loved it. Good comments. We're lucky we all have.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I don't know. Even my wife, who was there and saw the trailer, she said, I wanna play that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Sea of Thieves. Sea of Thieves. Not coming out till early 2018, but...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I did it once while the sun was out, once at night. Oh boy. Did you guys do, uh, karaoke?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I made a life change, if you haven't noticed. Probably not. I guess I've been carrying my wallet in my front pocket instead of my back pocket. You changed to the front? Changed to the front pocket.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Are you a freak? Are you nuts? But it gets bigger and bigger because of my coupons. Where's yours? My coupon like crazy, yeah? All my Peter Delight coupons and Tropical Smoothie Cafe. Double Coupon Day on Thursdays.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, my little channel, where I've just put junk on it, it has 34,000 hours of watch time right now. But my main channel, where I make shorter videos and put effort into them, has less watch time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Isn't it funny that, like, all your characters have started, or at least two of the main characters have started off high-pitched, and eventually, like, grow, like, hit puberty, like, uh, Drak was really high-pitched, and then he kind of went down, and then sighed, oh, hollywood!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That sounded like a good one. I was a little nervous. I thought that was gonna be like, this shit sucks! Yep, it could be. From Oprah!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Rollin' the dice with the most recent comment. Yep. You just scrolled down a little bit. There's some in there. That's all I got. Alright. Hey!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Along with, you know, just a few hundred thousand people. I can't keep secrets. I know. So, uh, my sister-in-law has this pet peeve about, like, you have to squeeze the toothpaste from the bottom. So whenever we go visit them,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All of my comments are from the Guts and Glory video. That was a fun game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think a couple of these comments, I know this one, is about Simon. Interesting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's from Busan. And it says, Simon, I have so much fun watching you get excited when you do something well in a video game. It's like going to years of your kid's shitty sporting events, but then finally in high school he starts making some smart plays and you can't help but feel proud and shed a little tear. I enjoyed that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, anybody- I'm helping! I'm helping! I am doing good things!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My next comment is from Hellbringer, says what a sexy mouse cursor on the recording screen.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is that like the equivalent of having like a bounce check with your picture? Like in a restaurant? Like, hey, this guy has bounce checks here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey, I could see a situation with cursor where the, like the good guys are going over a plan and then he pops out and


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Bullshit all the time. Alright, next comment is from Von Schwa. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, does Simon know someone named Frank? Because I can't help but notice that he keeps on saying that name over and over. The one I remember most was on Subnautica way back when they were naming the Seamoth.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, I highly doubt this gets answered in commenting on comments, but I'd like to know, lol.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just one. Okay. Uh, question for commenting. Oh, this is from Sloan. Carrie says, can you guys please do a survival mode GTA video? It's basically where waves and waves of enemies come at you. You just see how long you can make it. I feel it would be funny to watch how far you guys would make it


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. I have some news. This just in. News is news. What Vic? We are doing a giveaway with our partners at Zydex. They're gonna give away a PC. Worth fifty six hundred dollars.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's a lie. Uh, no. So we're doing this contest with JT Music. Uh, they live here in town. We've done some stuff with them before. Like those guys. Yeaah. So.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Contest is going on right now! There you go. As a matter of fact.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, what do you have to do to enter? You go to the link- Wait, it starts March 5th, ends when?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] April 11. April 11. And the winner will be announced...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh god, I feel like, I feel like they did this on purpose. What? On 420. Bunch of stoners out there in Utah. Mmhm. Ridiculous. Anyways, we're not gonna bore you with all the details, but go to the link in the description and you can find out everything that you need to do to enter and try to win yourself a sweet gaming PC. Good luck out there. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And we were riding in a van, me, my cousin and my dad, and my dad like, hit this jump and I was flying out and right when I landed, uh, I woke up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Both dreams I woke- no, I woke up to find myself, this was in the dream, to find myself in the air in this van, like flying up in the air like, oh shit, what'd you do dad?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is comfy. Anyways, go ahead.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm being cheeky. Cheeky bastard. What's your next comment?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey everybody. Hey. Hi. Hi. We're just bullshitting. Don't look at me like you expect me to have something prepared.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I did prepare something, but it wasn't like we have to do this, but if we get into this, then that's fine. We'll do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And each of these things sparks a little something for me. Like I looked at, um. Dairy beer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, you know what? I didn't see one dairy beer. Not one milk beer. At least, they're probably out there, but I haven't seen them. Sounds nasty. The first one is a beer called Precious.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That I don't know. Collards? See right there. No, but no, no, wait. You're doing your job. Thank you. No, but actually I'm kind of not because your body produces collagen and it's what the main thing that keeps for your skin.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, it's not. But we, it's a powder. You take like two tablespoons of it because your body stops making it as much as it normally does at the age of like 25. I thought you meant you ordered the beer. I was excited for him. No, I should have done that. But that beer seems like the Virginia Slims of beer. I'm just excited about.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, like on Sunday afternoons, there wasn't much on TV when I was growing up, back in the twenties.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But they always had these dubbed- Kung Fu movies. Oh yeaah. Those were the best. And I never got into them. It was always like, oh shit, this is on- You're crazy. I'm gonna watch you call. I love those, man. I had Neves. Did you watch those when you were a kid? Yeaah, I watched those. Oh man.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And when you pay attention to that and you ignore the fight, it's really funny.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was remember watching my dad was in like a soap opera, it was like days of our lives or something like that way back when, and he was doing the whole background thing. These are small sets, right? But he's in the way of everybody, you know, just to sit even at nine, I'm like, he's overacting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'd give that a whirl. Why not, right? And actually, I had a question related to this that I could ask you guys. We've all seen little, uh, like rabbit shit. Yeah. Little pellets. Little pellets. Would you eat one of those pellets for two grand?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, how about this? Your doctor bills will be taken care of financially, but you might get sick.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're negotiating here, one day a second. Come with Absarow, five grand, we'll start talking. One day of throwing up, let's just say three maximum times. Throwing up is the worst. I almost threw up today. Why? Listen, there's going to be vomit involved. I want 10 grand.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I'm curious, why did you almost get sick?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it was pretty intense. Like everybody in there could probably fight crime pretty easily. What time was that class? Uh, it was like 1045. Was this today? This was today. I was shaky walking out. I thought I saw Jesus at one point in time. Did they yell at you? Huh?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's not boop, it's just like you're doing hard shit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It sounds like a fat camp, but it's- Were the other moms there wore out? No. They were badass.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, well I had breakfast. What kind of breakfast? I had, uh, Frosted Mini Wheats. He drank a 32 ounce milkshake right before he went in. I had a mudslide. And two eggs. TGI Friday.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It really did, it was. Well, you guys are asking questions. Well, because that comes along with the story. I was curious! No, listen, I thought it was a great story. Thank you. Thank you, Simon. Um, Walker Beer, Walker Beer is made by Doc Street Brewing Company, and it's a dark, smoky creation, uh, but they, they brew it with fresh goat brains.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do you guys know what Rocky Mountain Oysters are? Yea. Testicles. So this is Rocky Bull, Pig or Sheep? Sheep. Technically. But this beer is Rocky Mountain Oyster Stout and this is made with bull specifically. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm curious, would you eat boiled bull testicles? If you heard for the most part, you go like, okay, most people think they taste pretty good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I guess they don't have it anymore. That can't be a beer. But that's what this beer was, 55%. That's 110 proof. There were only 11 bottles sold. They, uh, sold between $650 and $900 each. But they came encased


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is where everything falls off. Anybody see any good documentaries or television this week? I saw a movie. What movie? Manchester by the Sea. Oh, why you bringing that up?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, but it was interesting. It was interesting, but you also said it was depressing. It kinda was. You need a stiff drink after that one. Yea, and there was no... No climax. No climax.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pooper chocolate. I get, actually I get annoyed when, like, if my lady is, I'm like, hey, does this smell okay to you? And she's like, I don't want to smell it. I don't either. I didn't say it's so bad. Oh, this is gross! Smell it! That's one thing. Right. But just go like, oh, you know what? I think this smells a little funny. Give me your fucking opinion. You're talking about food in this case? Yes, food. Give me your opinion.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You have a bad nose. I am selfish. I've had several situations at my house where I've eaten leftovers and then my wife's come home and she's open the leftovers and going, oh boy, this is bad. I'm like, I had that for lunch.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, did y'all hear the Batman movie might be in trouble? What do you mean? Trouble? Well, trouble as in like, uh, it sounds like Menathalic may not be directing now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We also need like a good, like this is, like what Marvel has is like they have a plan, like this is where we're going. It seemed like DC's plan is just jumbled to hell because they're seeing what Marvel's doing, they're like, oh we gotta do that, we gotta shove this into the plan now. And the talent, you know, probably the director and the writers are like, why, why, why are you shoving this into the plan?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, like, go with it. Give it to a director who knows what they're doing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For no rea- like th- like to me, DC, they- like their movies have not earned that. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like I feel like- like if Marvel right now, if they were to kill Captain America in a movie, that would be devastating because they've earned it. Captain America's been around for several films, whatever. His death would mean something. It'd be like, oh wow. But now they've killed Superman. Off of a reboot. And you know they're gonna bring him back. We don't know that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They'd have had Superman there for like several movies, then killed him and actually stuck to their guns and kept him dead. That would have been pretty fucking cool. Yeah. If it was the writers from House of Cards, they would have killed him in the first five minutes. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I've only seen either two or three seasons of that show. I'm not deep into it. I'm waiting for it to be done and then I'm jumping in. I'm going to binge it. Am I going to like it? Y'all know me. You're not going to like it because it's a soap opera and it drags on. I enjoyed what I saw, but yeah, it does drag in some episodes. Like some episodes, man, it hits, it hits hard and it's like, wow, I can't believe that happened.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then you'll have two episodes where it's just like, okay, let's fucking go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We have building codes around here to keep our roads from flying off. You have to have something called hurricane hangers on the framing of your roof. I can't wait to get my solar roof. I got to sign up for it. Attaboy. You sign it up. I want to. Man, next year? Ten-year commitment.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If I get a roof, will you come by? You also get a free bottle of Elon Musk cologne. He's chopping out a touch. He's not missing any meals. He deserves it. He deserves it. He's probably got a lot of stress going on, that's alright.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, the one they say it starts at like 35?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They do make pretty nice looking cars. And they're in the space thing, like this, they're all over the place. What is, uh, Tesla? SpaceX. SpaceX, though, yeaah. I think the idea is to mine asteroids and shit, right? But the whole idea is to land, land in one piece, unmanned.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and that's, that's insane. Who are you to say? No one wants that above their house. Cause I know how helicopters work. It wouldn't be above your house. This is just- It might be. I don't know where they're gonna put this thing. Could be, yeah. It can fly.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Fulfillments, that's the worst euphemism I've ever heard for fucking warehouse.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's a weird place to have a hair. I know, I got one too. You got a nose hair? Like on your nose. Like on the front. But it's not like you have very coarse hair, mine's a little bit softer so it doesn't, well nobody kisses me. So, uh. But uh. Afro, go over there and give him a kiss.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Doing well. Well, you know. Simon set this interview up for 3 o'clock. Listen, I was talking to, I'm sure there's a reason, but I was talking to a nice V email. Things happened. It was set for, be sure to call 330, and at 330, first call happened.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, so news. Alright, so I got an email at 332, that said, from Priscilla,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, sure, she's a very sweet girl, right? Said, I nudged him. Cause apparently he was, you know, rubbing one out. No, maybe, I don't know. That would be a very personal thing, like he's rubbing one out and she gives him a nudge. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We have no idea. This might be a four minute conversation. I haven't talked to this guy in like, I did the math. It's been too long for me to even say.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 18 years. Wow. Since I've seen this gentleman. You guys could have had a...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] An adult child together. Yes, we might have.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Guys, you should play stickball out in the Bronx. I wish. I wish. That would have been fun. Yeaah, that would have been great. Yeaah, what were you doing in Ohio? Playing foursquare? You fucking idiot. I was!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Simon has made all of this up in a weird, elaborate story to just fuck with you guys.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This guy's from, he, he's not even from my hometown, he went to the school that was in my hometown, the same school that I went to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And when I heard this, I was like, that's fucking great. Yeah, of course. Cause I've always imagined myself.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Achieving things? I don't know, maybe doing something with my life. Or being him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Oh, let's not start this off by mocking him. There's a chance that he- We're not mocking him. If he does his voice, you don't think he's gonna be fucking seriously mocked. Hey guys, you guys like Birdman?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yea, no, I get what people like, listen, I think it's gorgeous, I think the gameplay is tight, it's just not my type of game. Right. It's like, I, you know, I think they're trying to be this thing and it didn't work out. We gave it a fair shot. Oh yea, we gave everything a fair shot around here, I feel like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, okay, so that was sent at 346 and one minute ago.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I'll beat two. No, I gotta stop though. Once I have three, I gotta stop. Uhm, well usually we drink a lot on Thursday. Thursday night!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, why, why go home? It'll, it'll be worth it the next day, and then the next day you're like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, well, I've said it to him several times, like, you just can't drink for the rest of your life, or you can never have more than X amount. Because it always goes horribly wrong.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I guess it kills their ability to know how to act properly. You think that would stop you?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, oh yeaah, yeaah, okay, uuuh, let's start with, uh, Casper.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sweet. It really is. Alright, well good. I'm sold. I don't think you're lying. Alright, who else we got, Simon? Oh, we have Siso. I guess I'll be the Siso guy. Okay, be the Siso guy. What would happen if the McElroy Brothers were to turn their popular advice podcast, My Brother, My Brother, and Me, into a TV show?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Watch Next Day, Late Night, Hilarious, Stand Up Specials, and Bidgeworthy classics including 42 seasons of Saturday Night Live. Holy crap, 42 seasons? That's a lot. That's awesome. And, uh, all of Monty Python's catalog. Damn! Plus, CISO has tons of great original series like My Brother, My Brother, and Me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] As well as an animated fantasy role playing game starring Dan Harmon, who I really like, Dan Harmon. Yeah. And a fake reality show created by the geniuses behind Comedy Bang Bang and Reno 911.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So access CISO anytime, anywhere on iOS, Android, Apple TV, and almost any other device.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All for just 3.99 per month, no joke. None. That's not supposed to be funny. Nope.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's s-e-e-s-o dot com promo code Neebs, CISO dot com promo code.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Neebs. That's it. All right. So let's get back to the, uh, drinking stories and whatnot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You transition from vomit to... No, I don't vomit. I'm not a vomiter. I'm a very rare vomiter. But, like, just recently I had a few days of a beener. I had a friend come from out of town and I drank, like, you know, a lot and had a good time, just laughing, didn't go out to bars, just hung out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't drink anymore beer, I drink water with what I eat. That's the most important thing, hydration. Then I go to bed, and I always remember when there's those, like, eating events. It's like, oh yeaah. I'd fuckin' take tidbits, they were fuckin' delicious.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You guys have some history. We do have some history. I actually have, it's, it's the question that everyone's been wondering. Okay? Yeaah. It's the first question I have for you and then we're just gonna, whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One of the, I think the last, the last time I saw you, we were working, I was working at Timepiece, you worked there briefly too, right? Timepiece County and Rockville Center.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You did, you did, my brother reminded me of it. You did sketch comedy in there, didn't you?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And now, yeaah, it's one of those endings where it's like, movie was real solid and now all of it's like a grease ending, they just fly off in the car.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But then Emma looked up, so for me, with that smile, yeaah, I guess so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Gather this information, I remember him saying that apparently you used to, when you were younger, this is back, way back when, you would hang out a lot in the theater, you're a big theater geek, and you would hide up in the theaters and you would sleep there? Is that crazy or did that happen?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, and let me ask you this because we were in Germany recently.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, uh, his sister is, no, Eileen.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it's all about like just to get a little bit whatever, uh, not preachy in a good way. You gotta keep on going. It's like, and thank God you had your friend Chris who pulled you back in cause it's easy to want to give up. So everyone out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, uh, you work with a cool charity, Open Doors.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, it's nice to hear a story like you of when it comes out. Well, you, it's not like you came from anything. You just worked at it and you kept on going and you loved it. And to be able to tell somebody, Hey, you know what, even though this seems like a pipe dream, it's not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is a dream you can make come true. And, uh, you know, it's so easy when you're a kid. And even if, even if you're in East Rockaway, the Bronx, somewhere in Ohio, a lot of people are just going, fuck this. Like, I can't do that. That's bullshit. I can't really be that person that does it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Let's see the chocolate inside it. There you go. You sold her off a week ago. We gotta get a chocolate gold play button. Oh yea. That must have been something going to the Oscars. Like back room party, come on, who's doing blow, who's doing what. I'm just kidding.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I mean, I'm sure it was a pretty interesting experience to go to the Oscars. Let alone be on stage, I would have been shitting. I'm a very, uh, I get very scared. Like if I was on stage, I would have, I cry when I get scared.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would have never been able to, I do, it's strange, it's weird. Were you shitting a brick when you were on stage? Did you have a good time with the Oscars?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was my favorite moment of all. That's amazing. Well listen, thank you so, really man, thanks a lot for doing this. My pleasure, absolutely.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, thanks again, and uh, man, go eat a good sandwich for me, cause they're lacking around here. Really? Oh god, here we go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Buy beer. Well, and give the beer away. He was giving it away. I wish Warren Beatty would have said Dick Tracy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know. To me the commenting, comments, and podcasts kind of blur together. Okay. It's just us talking.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If my voice was high pitched, could I do this? Paging Mr. Herman. Paging Mr. Herman.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do two short ones. No, I would love to see two a week. But they take all week to cut. And Anthony is in charge of cutting those. And we only have one Anthony.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well here's the scoop. Everyone in this office, and there's six of us, works on one video per week right now. And we spend all week on it, trying to make it the best we can.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, in between recording. And the arc sessions are long, they're...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Gotcha, I haven't seen that yet. Now it- Neebs, you've talked about this. Uh, well, for a long time, we weren't big enough to be a business on YouTube, and Twitch helped us out a lot. Uh, helped us get to a point where we're a big channel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Also, I guess you would have to rely on things like Patreon or some sort of crowdfunding.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you haven't watched Conan, you need to watch it. Conan Exiles.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We ran into a family that invited us into their tribe, and the whole family's playing together, and Mama Sabra was really into killing bodies and taking their souls or something.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I enjoyed it. Usually when we play multi-players, we're playing like, PvP. Right. That's what we've done in the past, and that's a mistake, because we're only in there for like, 15 minutes to an hour, and these guys have been in there grinding, just killing us. But in PvE, we can just go around talking to people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I will say, uh, I enjoyed the game. But you're not gonna go back. I don't- Be real. I would like to see more of that world. But we have possibly two survival games going right now. We just did one episode of Subnautica and people seemed to like it, so we might do more Subnautica. We're still doing Ark. If we don't do it right now, maybe in the near future.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The water? Yeaah. Or was that me that said that? Yeaah. I thought it was him. You get us mixed up, don't you? Alternative facts?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, Thicc has joined. Yes he has. Tralys, you're gonna join that one. I want to. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So we did call you, and uh, I hate we missed you, but check out our next Coming On Comments video, and uh, you're kind of in it? I was hoping at least you'd have like a machine. Like a personal, like an answering machine?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright Ryan, anyway, uh, we love you, and we will catch you later.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, we covered that in a previous video, and I started- We don't have gizzards. I started chewing more as well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Even before chewing, I'm able to poop really well. Like, I'm a pro.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He thinks Simon was there trying to flush me down the toilet.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's gotta pluck his eyebrows and do his nails.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. Let me ask you guys this. I know Neebs, you're very health conscious and concerned about what things you put into your body. Remote, I mean a little bit. A little bit, shit. You won't eat a gummy bear. You're like, that's not food.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's it. Yeah, I enjoy Chick-fil-A because there are healthy choices there. I do the grilled nuggets and the fruit instead of fries, but I will still get the fried stuff and do the waffle fries. I love the damn waffle fries. I mix it up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I remember when there was a big stink about Chick-fil-A supporting anti-gay something or other. It was all over Facebook a couple years ago. Oh yea. And I had a lot of, you know, we've got a lot of friends, a lot of gay friends, and I had a lot of gay friends that were like, hey, boycott Chick-fil-A. And I'm like, ughhh. You're out of your mind. I don't know about that, man.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The cashiers were cheek kissing hello to everybody. Pretty much.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was listening to the radio this morning, and they were talking about a couple of kids who, uh, did the make-a-wish thing. And they were like, weird make-a-wish requests. And the radio people kept calling them bucket list things, and it's like, yeah, I don't know, that's probably not a good term. Wait, really? Yeah. Uh, so anyways, the first-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is making me sad too. I told you the stories suck. Anyways, it was an interesting request for the Make-A-Wish, and the one kid, he was obsessed with Amazon. He loved to receive things from Amazon, like in the mail. It just, you know, that made his day. He wanted to be a majority shareholder.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, they actually let him go tour the facility. Million square feet for one of the distribution facilities. Really? They said he was like a kid in a candy shop.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But he was a kid in the Amazon distribution center. That's weird, but okay. The other story that I thought was interesting, there was a 16 year old girl who always wanted to tase a cop. She didn't hate cops. She just, she saw a video one time of a cop getting tased.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, some cops in her area heard about this and, uh, they even played the audio where she was tasing the cops.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She felt really bad about it afterwards. She's like, I don't like inflicting pain on people. Why didn't I wish this? That is weird. Thank God she wasn't in Aladdin.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I listen to hip hop. I listen to just about everything. And that song, I was like, yeah, this is a good song. But then I started checking out more stuff that he does, and that guy is an awful rapper. There are three rappers out there that are fucking garbage.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Never heard of either of those. They're rough. They have no bars.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't listen to any of that. Sorry for being so negative. That's okay. It's alright buddy. But yea, I know you made the exact noise that he makes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You've been doing this for years now and- I never get phone calls. Yeah, until you get em. Yeah, until you get em. Oh, I never get phone calls.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ooh. Oh, well that's good. So anyway, if you have questions for him or you might not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Jason Sudeikis came to mind. Lake Bell was there too. And that's, you know what? That's the time where somebody pointed to the door, they're like, Hey, is that your daughter? And she was like, I don't know, like a year and a half old or two years old. And she, she had her butt, butt cheeks pressed right up against the...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The glass door. I was like, yeah, that is my daughter, thank you. And it was one of those, it was like, I think it was Lake Bell that was like, hey, isn't that your daughter?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thank you. I think that there was one of his productions that actually came through town and my agent was like, hey, we got this part here, uh, do you want to audition for it? It's for a Kirk Cameron Christian movie. I said, fuck no.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yes. That's what really owns the planet, the ants.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Good thing those things aren't big. Jesus.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's going on in the news? We got the United debacle, which is fun. Yeah, that was crazy. Yeah, that's super fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, okay. The, uh, YouTube ad boycott's still going on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, it's basically, uhm, there was a couple of articles coming out from the Wall Street Journal that were saying, uh, hey, your advertisers, your content might appear next to ISIS videos or Nazi videos. And they actually showed, like, yeaah, there was some really questionable content that these ads were appearing next to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then so, all the old, like, advertisers, there was Pepsi, Johnson & Johnson, several of them just fold out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Until we have a little bit more control and know what our ads are going to be placed on what type of content.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So YouTube's in a scramble. They enacted a new policy where if you start a YouTube channel, you have to get at least 10,000 views on your channel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And also, like, the math doesn't add up. It's like, you know, what's the percentage of hateful speech videos being uploaded compared to the percentage of just normal content?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but some advertisers, some advertisers jump back in quickly because like they were like, yes, we're pulling our ads off YouTube. And then a few days later they see, oh shit, no one's going to our website anymore.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're putting our ads back on YouTube. I mean, because, I mean, I don't think YouTube's not going anywhere.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, and that's not uhm, I mean that is Marvel, but that is the, that is not Sony. So that's 20th Century Fox.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anthony went and saw it. Did you enjoy it? Alright, Anthony gives two thumbs up. Yeah. Those are his fingers. It's so fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A much better podcast. What we should do is we should get, uh, uh, podcast topics from the audience. Like maybe they can leave it down in the comments section.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's a minute. You gotta be careful. It's a chainsaw by your mouth. I have a chainsaw. Why don't you guys try it? I bet you I can do none. Do it blindfolded. Just gotta be careful.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Guys, I was on the fence on that. Nobody asked for my opinion. What do you think? I was on the fence about it. What do you think? I actually think yours because it sounded so odd. Right. Well, yeah, cause the whole racing thing on the front legs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I don't know with the pogo if he's good at like launching forward and juggling.


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[Assistant] Okay, I'll change my answer then. Fuck. Uh, 19 minutes. Okay. Ooh. I'm gonna go 19 minutes, one dollar.


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[Assistant] Which one's better, apple bicep or this? I'm gonna go with the apples because it's the most intriguing and the one that seems the most beatable.


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[Assistant] So she calls up, she's asking for Mr. Lion, and this was on April Fools, and they're like, man, this is the Trejembo Zoo. I think someone's playing a joke on you. And, and they hung up. She called back three times. This is an emergency. I need to speak to Mr. Lion.


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[Assistant] Yeah, they should play a prank on their friends and download this podcast to their phones.


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[Assistant] Oh no, I've seen someone do it. Marathon people do it all the time. I don't know, it's like sneezing and keeping your eyes open. Well, if you had the runs, that'd be. Exactly. That works out really well, doesn't it? The runs. The runs. Yeah, I saw some. Yeah, it does. Double meaning there. Yeah, but that's not even really shitting, is it? You're kinda pissing. Just kidding. You're just leaking at that point.


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[Assistant] Toilet? We haven't got a toilet yet? So let's, since you brought Patreon, let's just get that out of the way. It's obviously the changes are not, they weren't gonna happen immediately.


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[Assistant] They, here let me, I'll right snap that one. They weren't gonna happen immediately. Is that your strong snip?


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[Assistant] I could continue with the comments, go ahead. I got something that was fun. Go ahead. Uhm, uh, recently I read there is, uh, the world's smallest porpoise.


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[Assistant] And, uh, most endangered, uh, sea mammal.


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[Assistant] Uhm, yeaah, there's 60 left. Good lord. They're wrangling on the US dollars. Yeah, US dollars, but uh, I just think it's, I think it's pretty cool to have a little


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[Assistant] Team of elite dolphins. They can wrangle. That's amazing. Fuck yea it is. I'd love to see that.


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[Assistant] Have you ever guys, er, you guys ever been in the equivalent, uh, I remember back when I was younger, uhm, at the...


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[Assistant] I've never seen Dune. I've never seen Dune either. But apparently it's a big movie. Depending on your age, like there's a certain, okay, so you were in between the ages of six and


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[Assistant] It is what you get. I know people who react to that. I know people who haven't seen Star Wars.


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[Assistant] Right. Yeah, they're dead to me. Some people just don't like science fiction or like fantasy period. Yeah. I had a friend back home. I remember when the second Lord of the Rings hit the theaters. I was so excited to go see it and he was just like, yeah, okay.


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[Assistant] And he's like, I just don't like fantasy. I'm like, but these movies are amazing. It's like, yeah, it was alright when we're done. Did you like it? Nah, it's alright.


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[Assistant] Yeah, and if you wait, they're gonna make three hobbits.


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[Assistant] The thing I'm really, uh, I dig about Empyrean is the terraforming, cause I think that being an option in any of these games is so cool when you have


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[Assistant] But the terraforming is still weird in that game. It's weird in that game, so they don't have it down either, but like. But you could do it. But you could do it like, uh, I remember Anthony was talking the other day, we were talking about like monsters and like, if in scrap, and obviously it wouldn't work in scrap, but if you could make like a


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[Assistant] What's that? Tremors? Worm? Type of thing? Like if you could make something or tame something that actually goes into the earth, like,


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[Assistant] You know, Minecraft has the fully formable environment, but like games that, when you can actually completely take control of the environment, I think that's cool. Getting to that level further and further. Within any game, an RPG, any game.


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[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, yeah, cuz you can make them all pretty.


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[Assistant] We know, and we've done the exact same video with other things. Alright.


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[Assistant] It was pretty much a scrap thing, uh, I really enjoyed doing it because there was like a little piece that didn't really fit in the actual cut and I liked throwing it at the end. And for the record, um, every now and then Niebs will, uh, do a scrap as well. It's not always me. Yep, some of them I do.


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[Assistant] No, motorbikes and hot air balloons. Noted. That's fine. Noted.


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[Assistant] Like, I pictured out like a two flying airships, kind of hovering, you know, side by side and shooting the shit that we have at each other, like two flying pirate ships, kind of.


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[Assistant] So it's not- That'd be cool too. Uhm, one thing, and they wouldn't be incredibly fast projectiles, but-


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[Assistant] And if they were at a different, at an angle, we haven't tried the pistons. Bloop in a block. Bloop in a block. Yea, it might be a...


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[Assistant] I had a dream about that the other night. I've never played it, but just talking about it, uh, inspired a dream. Seven days to die dream. Yeaah. I was like with a group and we were like fortifying some area knowing that some zombie horde was coming eventually. Uhm, that's pretty much it. That's a fun dream. Yeaah. I might have had sex with someone, I don't know.


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[Assistant] Oh, I was gonna, I brought this up to Simon, I brought it up to Nieves the other day too, but uhm, a movie that for some reason I just kinda looked past, but I found it fuckin' hilarious. Uhm, What We Do In The Shadows?


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[Assistant] But uh, the lady and I watched it last weekend, and uh, one of the vampires popped up. I was like, I know that vampire. And it was Jermaine from Flight of the Concords. Oh cool. And turns out he directed and co-wrote it. And it was hilarious.


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[Assistant] It was, a lot of effort went into it. Definitely. It was just done. What? What are you smiling at? It wasn't hilarious.


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[Assistant] I'm just used to, aren't we all used to like the comedies that like hit the theaters or whatever and they always fall short. Oh. Like there might be a good laugh or two, but for the most part you're like, yeah, whatever, it was just another big budget comedy that's just like pfft, you know? Yeah.


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[Assistant] When you're expecting to be let down. It was fun. It was fun. I really enjoyed it. It's like a kind of a John Hughes throwback kind of feel, right?


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[Assistant] And your answer was Central Intelligence. Copy that. That's the best movie made.


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[Assistant] Arc summon? This is Subnautica. Oh, gotcha!


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[Assistant] Isn't it weird how that's like such a standard with games these days? Especially like PC. It's an equivalent of like a feature film.


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[Assistant] Putting out three or four minute clips over and over and over, and then when the last one's out, they're like, and now the feature comes out. It's just all of it.


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[Assistant] If they were to wait until the game was full, uh, fully done, they've, they probably already have watched videos that showed them everything they wanna fuckin' play anyway.


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[Assistant] It's like Metroid in a way where you have to go to this side of the map to get something that works on this side of the map, that works on this side, you know.


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[Assistant] So how do you feel about, uhm, I remember Anthony bringing it up, but Doom and Fallout being in the VR versions of that coming soon.


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[Assistant] I'm intrigued and follow up more because of the VR possibility.


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[Assistant] Just think if like at some factory or something there was like a robot that you and your living room was doing the work with your VR set on, but it was like directly transferred to making that robot move. Right?


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[Assistant] That seems like a worthy thing to convert your garage to accommodate.


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[Assistant] Mhm. I watched a little, uh, it was like a little interview with him or something, but, uh, I respect that man quite a bit.


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[Assistant] He was a try and fail kind of guy over and over and over, it seems. And, uh, just kept failing at everything he was trying to do, you know. Just, but kept trying. You cannot, you know, you have to respect the hell out of that. He just seems like that kind of guy.


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[Assistant] That's how I picture the, um, the pirate, uh, you know, Sea of Thieves. I picture that dynamic on the ship with us, and kind of the same idea.


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[Assistant] Be a nice little spinoff show. You'd see the leads every now and then come in, you know,


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[Assistant] And people learn that Game of Thrones language too, you know. Oh, really? The one that Khaleesi, you know, the...


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[Assistant] Are you usually- That's your job! We made it very clear when we started this podcast you were not to do any preparation. But I like to feel mentally prepared.


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[Assistant] What's the topic, Simon? What have you prepared for us today? What haven't you prepared for us today? Let's talk about...