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[Assistant] What do they talk about Notre Dame? What do they talk about Panama City Community College? This is, these are the conversations that Notre Dame's doing this. Right. But I mean, is, I mean, but.


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[Assistant] Well, what would be the other scenario? I don't know. I'm just saying I enjoy. Yeah. Yeah. That it's like, it's, uh,


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[Assistant] They really should throw us some regular folk into, we should be able to get into the real colleges.


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[Assistant] Just so we can be like, just going like, wait a sec. You need a couple, that idea of variable, like show that like then the racing, Olympic racing, show a regular person to show off fast.


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[Assistant] Yeah, do you think if a fish, say your fish, that's now turned into you?


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[Assistant] Yeah, if there was ever something that, yeah, you would just figure a way out.


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[Assistant] We don't eat stuff anymore. We don't eat plants. Yeah, if you have a cold time, you just...


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[Assistant] Well then some of the dinosaurs did adapt, if it's alligators and...


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[Assistant] Noah. They don't want to say that. They're going to go flip. They should be flipped. Right.


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[Assistant] You think that's what you would do, say you're backed in a corner with one of these. A chupacabra. A chupacabra and you just go.


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[Assistant] Like, uh, off, I mean, he's like dude, I guess labradoodles or.


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[Assistant] Dogs, you know, the breeds, like, when are they, uh, you just start throwing some stuff together.


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[Assistant] This man, I just don't know how they give birth to it. Where are you going to put it? Kentucky. Kansas is a bit of land.


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[Assistant] That doesn't feel wooly mammothy. Uh, it needs to be colder, doesn't it? Kentucky feels it, maybe because mammoth cave, I'm thinking. Oh yeah. Kentucky feels like a good wooly mammoth. Oh yeah.


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[Assistant] I mean, but you gotta like, for them to do all that, like this is the stuff that I'm saying, like they're like, yeah, so we're working on that. You're like, yeah, what about cancer though? Like how many people?


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[Assistant] Yeah. But I'm saying this is the problem. They could do this ear thing and you're like, how many people have one ear? 30? 40? Like, I mean.


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[Assistant] You're like, that is for all the people that are missing ears. You're like, we don't hear that much about the ears. Especially if you're missing your ear.


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[Assistant] You don't hear a lot of that. So I'm not saying we don't ever want to fix ears, but like, is that not a whole lab? We could be like, let's have you guys work on some cancer. They go, now we're going to do the ear thing.


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[Assistant] I read about a guy that has, uh, one nostrils, all skin. So we're going to get a wrap and then make a nostril hole.


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[Assistant] That's crazy. I never even thought that different states would, we did a frog and that was it.


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[Assistant] Did anybody ever do the joke where they go, where'd you get this cat at?


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[Assistant] If you don't, so you don't learn language by the time you're five, you just can't learn it.


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[Assistant] 1890. And guess what? 70 years. I mean an old company. This is what they were, that's how early they got started.


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[Assistant] Oh, like apple, yeaah, yeaah. How old, yeaah, apple's not.


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[Assistant] Seventy, yeaah. What, forty years old? Seventy yeaah. Yeaah. Noah, was, was double the length of Apple.


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[Assistant] And, and then, and then they, they didn't swing on up to Arizona and go, let's take a


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[Assistant] Yeah, like I would think in 1823 you would have more of what we did know so. It'd be more like national only, ocean stuff only. Like you'd be, that's how they're naming stuff back then.


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[Assistant] Are you ready for Manny guest? Yeah. Uh, I'm in, uh, Iowa this week. This is the two, two of the rescheduled shows from the SNL thing. So, uh, I'll be, uh, yeah, there this week in the new year's Eve in, uh, sunrise, Florida.


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[Assistant] Uh, I'll be headlining then my dad and, and, uh, Mike Vecchione, Greg Warren, Joe Zimmerman. Uh, yeah, it's a, and then Julie McCollough hosting. It's yeah. I challenge you to find that. I mean, like if you, pound for pound, that show is going to be ridiculous. Right. Right.


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[Assistant] So it's, uh, we're, we're very pumped about that. Uh, so yeah, we'll be down there.


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[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, everybody. January 16th, Netflix, start of the year. I mean, that's going to be fun. Yeah. Just, you know, getting the year going and just pop in. It'll be a big year for you to see. It's a big year, dude.


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[Assistant] Yeah, yeah. And then your own podcasts and you even go more into it.


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[Assistant] Uh, alright, uh, I'll be back though for the year. Yeah, you'll be, uh,


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[Assistant] Alright, and then, uh, alright, so I'll see you then. And, but this is the last time all four of us will be? I think for like a month.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Guys, happy new year. Congrats on everything. Uh, we love you as always. And, uh, yeah, we'll see you next week. All right. Bye.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nate Land is produced by Nate Land Productions and by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife Laura on the AudioBoom platform.


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[Assistant] Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land podcast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] At one point I go, I am good at comedy. I said that at one point. Nobody agreed.


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's, you'd rather be in the dunking booth. Yeah.


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[Assistant] Hey, what's up everybody? Uh, this is, you know, the first episode we are not able to record because of weather. Snow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's up everybody? Welcome to the Nate Land podcast. I'm Nate.


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[Assistant] Brian Bates, Aaron Weber, uh, welcome folks. Hello folks. I said that almost accidentally. Like I forget.


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[Assistant] If I have something to do, I kind of forget. Uh, we are pre-recording this episode, uh, cause I will be, uh, in California at the One Night Only tour. Already just happened, so hope you were there.


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[Assistant] Uh, so, uh, yeah, just so you know that we are pre-recording it. We actually still have some comments though. Uh, breakfast went through.


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[Assistant] And just grab, you know, some ones that didn't, that weren't timely. Yeah. Just critical. Timeless ones. Picked a big one. Opened the gate with a big one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, one comment too, I got, someone said I wore my watch backwards cause of this, this, the dial is on this side. That, that was, that was like one of those like Facebook things that you see. It's so you don't hit the Siri button when you bend your wrist. And I was hitting it a lot. So you, you wear, you put the dial back here and he never touches it.


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[Assistant] And then you can just change the screen. Now your sleeves going to touch it. Uh, that's not enough of a problem.


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[Assistant] But I mean hitting it, especially when I golf, if I wore this, but any other time, it just always hits Siri.


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[Assistant] Siri, Siri just pops up, man. All the time.


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[Assistant] I feel like with Siri you either don't do it or that's all you do.


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[Assistant] Like that's how someone talks to it. They either, I don't ever ask Siri anything. I don't either. But anybody else that does?


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[Assistant] My wife talks to Siri quite a bit. Uh, her voice texting.


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[Assistant] It's not as bad as you think. It's like just getting, saying it and it's, you know, it doesn't take as much time and you just do it. I actually don't mind it as much as I thought I would, but at first I was like, what are we doing? What are we doing?


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[Assistant] Fantastic podcast. I love listening to you banjo and Aaron at the beginning of every operation day before I come perform complex spinal surgery. I mean, he is.


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[Assistant] Would you be, what are you listening to? Nate Land podcast.


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[Assistant] What's that? Are you the main guy or is there other guy? That's what they, didn't they ask him or you're just the guy that's in here now and there's another guy. He's like, no, no, I'm the main. Oh yeah. When's the real doctor coming out? Oh, that's great. Wow. I'm Dr. Seftar Khan. Hello folks. Hello folks. He yells it into your open back. Hello folks. I perform complex spinal surgery.


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[Assistant] It makes me laugh and puts me into a relaxed frame of mind before I start the day operating on sick patients.


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[Assistant] Once during an especially complicated surgery when the room was very tense and we were under extreme stress, I just yelled, penguin! To everyone's surprise. I proceeded to tell the OR team the story and had them play the clip on the OR monitors and within minutes everyone began chuckling. The room became noticeably less tense and I'm grateful to report that patient did very, very well.


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[Assistant] Thanks again for the unbelievable work you guys are doing. Anytime you come up to Columbus in the future, I'd love to host you in the shoe on the field for an OSU Big Ten football game. Wow. I tell you what, a guy that's doing that kind of surgery, he's got tickets on the field.


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[Assistant] I mean, that's, that's a guy you want in your life. You know?


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[Assistant] Uh, that's unbelievable. You know, we just did the episode you just watched about, uh,


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[Assistant] Clutch performances, that's a clutch performance right there. Doing something like that, man. The amount of pressure that takes to just be, you know, you gotta do hours and hours of them. You wanna be someone's first guy. You think they ever say that? Right before you go under, they go, you're my first time.


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[Assistant] And he's like, what's that? And then you're just gone. Yeah, that's awesome though. Sore. Sogorb.


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[Assistant] I hope it's his name. Oh man. Sore. Get in here. You have to say the last name or you just go sore. And he goes here. Every teacher. I don't think you need to be any more specific. Sore. Uh, he just sits there and the teacher's like, uh, which one? Oh.


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[Assistant] I play your podcast while working, illustrating on my computer sometimes I spend large amounts of time without saving my progress because I forget to do so and then my computer crashes and I lose all my work. Now I click save every time I hear Nate say unbelievable or every time he roasts bland bread.


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[Assistant] I haven't lost a single piece of work ever since. That's gotta be frustrating to, I mean, everybody knows not saving something.


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[Assistant] All the time, I've, when I've written out shows, like, Sir William, a hat, Nate Bargetti show, from the field. We sent a bunch of these hats to, uh, Nigeria.


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[Assistant] They, uh, but yeah, you types of that. I mean, it's a whole, you're just in the groove of like doing it. And then it just goes away and you're like, and then the next time is never as good. You're like, that's the gist of it. And you're like, it's not that good. Yeah. Well, I, I lost it. Miriam Gregory. I've been a fan of the podcast since day one. Is that, you think that's right?


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[Assistant] Uh, Seven. Which is, these are all just George Costanza names. That he came up with. Sora Sigour. Oh, it's beautiful. It is, yea. I got a good idea what that guy looks like.


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[Assistant] Thanks for the comment. I feel like you can picture a sore. You can picture him in your head. I feel like I've never, I don't know what they look like, but I think I could pickle. Oh right. If you said there's a hundred people standing in the crowd, one of them's named Sore, I'd be like, I feel pretty good, I can figure out who he is. If you lined up Dr. Kong,


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[Assistant] Sor, well, it's not if it's Soray Segorb. Soray Segorb. Soray Segorb. Like a Ukrainian ballet dancer or something. Well, they could be big bands. Soray Segorb doesn't sound as bad. That's what I'm saying. That sounds like a ballet dancer from Eastern Europe. Soray. Soray Segorb. That actually is a beautiful name.


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[Assistant] I feel like if I find some little girl sitting out, down the side of the road and she lives with us, I feel like that's how you get a soray in your family.


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[Assistant] I've been a fan of the podcast since day one. I just want to say thank you for everything you taught me. Since hearing all of your bombing stories and insults, I've been a lot better at taking myself less seriously.


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[Assistant] I recently had the chance to sing on TV for the first time and I've never been more confident. I felt like it'd be okay to look stupid and it would be a good story until after, but it went great. So thank you. Congratulations, Nate, Erin, and worried whistle. I love you all. We need to hear her. Let's we need to get a clip of that.


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[Assistant] See it on TV? I'd love to see that. Uh, what is she singing? For TV? That's crazy. Uh, Jonathan Redd. That's a normal one. Is that more up your alley?


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[Assistant] They will end the podcast. They have been talking about it since episode one or two, and I'm sure they thought Aaron.


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[Assistant] Would have done it by now. Love the show. It's the best part of my week. Goodbye, folks.


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[Assistant] All we know is two boxes go in and no boxes come out. We think he's littering as well. Uh, yeah, we're going, we're going to do it. That's going to be a special one.


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[Assistant] We gotta, we just, we gotta find the right time. Right.


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[Assistant] I think we film it and then we filmed it and then we put it out as it is.


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[Assistant] I had Krispy Kreme this past week. Uh, I have it a lot. I'm starting to feel it now though. I can feel like my blood's getting thicker. Can you feel that?


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[Assistant] Yeah, like you just, like, I eat so bad, you're like, I feel like my blood's not moving as good as it should be.


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[Assistant] And I don't think I should feel that. It didn't stop me, but I remember going, I got to stop this. This is.


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[Assistant] My arm feels weird. Uh, Grant Weldon. I teach fifth graders and I have to switch classes because the teacher rotates now instead of students rotating. Oh wow. So this teaches.


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[Assistant] Students stay in the room and the teachers move. Yeah. Is that cause of COVID? Uh, when I go into the class, I enter saying, hello folks. And they say, hello, Mr. Weldon.


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[Assistant] It's so sweet and they don't know why I do it, but I love it every time. That's cool. That's cool, man. Good for you. Good for you. That's so, so they're just switching, moving around, almost spreading COVID around, trying to give it to all the kids. They go, one teacher has it. We don't tell them which one. And they see if they can guess.


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[Assistant] Mike Pugh. Hello folks. When my wife and I married in 1978, there was a still law on the books in Michigan that the clerk had to ask, are you an idiot?


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[Assistant] Thinking we were Barghetti level comedians, we both said, I'm not, but this one is. While pointing our fingers at each other. Of course, the clerk did not crack a smile. I can only assume she had heard that one before. Keep up the great work. Also, we love to see you guys live. We just bought our son and his wife a ticket to the LA drive-in show. Mike Pugh will be at the drive-in show.


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[Assistant] He was at the drive. Oh, he was. Oh, he was at the drive because we're recording this.


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[Assistant] I asked both of y'all before we did this podcast, are y'all idiots?


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[Assistant] And I said, cause I am. And I don't need more than me. Uh, that's not a, you know, not a, not a, just ask the person you're about to marry. Hey, just heads up real quick. Are you an idiot by any chance?


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[Assistant] Little more, you know, publicly acceptable.


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[Assistant] Hey guys, speaking of what would you do moments, I have a Starbucks related story and I was wondering, what'd you do in my place? I was in line at a Starbucks and the lady in front of me was rifling, right?


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[Assistant] She was so confidently picking it up and putting it in her purse that I didn't know what to do so I just didn't say anything and let her keep it.


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[Assistant] Anyway, Ron reminded me of something you guys would talk about. Love the podcast. Thanks for all of it. We need to get some better stuff to talk about. He's like, this is right up their alley. This is, I mean, he goes, this would be one of the top episodes.


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[Assistant] I do like talking about this stuff though, and I would let her have it. You would? Yeah, oh yeah.


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[Assistant] It would be the, it'd matter the situation. Have you seen this happen? You nodded like you'd seen this.


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[Assistant] Uh, when she says, oh gosh, sorry, and start picking up all the change, I would...


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[Assistant] If once she, if she said something, if she didn't say anything, I would've just picked it up. But if she said something like that, I would've probably just been like, just let her have it. If it gets too, too many people start paying attention, I mean this is a big commotion, so then people start looking, I probably would've done what he did and just been like, it's uh, you know, it's over.


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[Assistant] I will, I, I a lot of times think about what would happen. Like if I say it's mine, and that she disagrees.


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[Assistant] Now in an argument over change on the floor. Right. And so, do I want to be in that argument?


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[Assistant] Oh, he dropped me. He goes, no, no, that's fine. Uh, yeah. $3.25 is a lot. 12.


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[Assistant] NRS Automotive, since the podcast is a clean podcast, does it automatically rule out the possibility of having some of your potty-mouthed comic friends as guests? For example, Big J. It does not rule it out. Uh, Big J was here. I, I, I don't necessarily want to do a Zoom, so that's why, you know, it's kind of got to be people here.


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[Assistant] But if Jay comes to town, you know, I mean, Jay could probably stay with us. And if he stayed with us, I'd have him on the podcast. I would tell him, you know, it's like, hey, we're trying to be clean. If he's not, I would just beep stuff out. Uh, is honestly what I would do. But I mean, Big Jay's done TV. Big Jay's, it's close though.


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[Assistant] But Big J is so funny, we're talking about random things. Uh, but there's something that's even harder to keep guys like that clean.


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[Assistant] Is when they talk, you know, especially because the bonfire, which is a him and soda, so good. And they, but they're, and they're just talking. So talking in like this is where it's hard to control. I always think if you're trying to stop cursing, or if you, if you say you're, you say you, a lot of people in regular life could curse too, they feel they curse too much.


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[Assistant] In just regular life, it's start weaning it out in some regular conversations. You just think I'm going to go to this house and I'm not going to curse. And that way you can learn to hold it back. And that's how you practice it. And so, you know, but yeah, I would have Jay on obviously. I mean, we'd be thrilled.


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[Assistant] Get lore on, you know? Uh, get rid of...


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[Assistant] Who's Jay? Who's Laura? Both offensive. Uh, Ben Kissam. Hi guys, question for an aspiring comic in Denver. I haven't done stand-up since March. I was about a year in at the time, starting to find my voice on stage.


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[Assistant] Cases arising here again, I just heard from a public official they don't really anticipate the city being open again until next June. If you were faced with this as a newer comic, how would you handle it? Would you pursue something else like a podcast or YouTube videos or should I just move to the South where coronavirus isn't real in hopes of getting on stage sooner?


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[Assistant] You know, a year in, here's what I, well honestly, my brutal opinion, you're not finding your voice. Uh, that's just my honesty with being a year in. You could think you're finding some voice, but I promise you're not.


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[Assistant] It's going to change and then you're going to be in five years, be like, that was insane. But I think it's good to thank you for your voice. It's good to go through all this.


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[Assistant] Yeah, during this time, it's tough. Uh, you could start a podcast. You could do some YouTube stuff. There's other different ways you could try to be creative. That's definitely not a bad thing to go do. You can try to go to different places and move. Uh, you got a great scene in Denver though. Honestly, I'd probably wait it out unless you want it to move.


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[Assistant] I mean, just go down and try to stay somewhere if you wanna go try to get up. But I...


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[Assistant] I mean, you got a great scene in Denver, man. Denver's a, Denver's a hot spot to be for comedy.


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[Assistant] I don't think anybody's getting up. So I don't think you're missing anything. I mean, we're doing some, they're doing like some social distance shows at places, but.


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[Assistant] You're, you're competing also with so many people that have been doing it longer and no one's getting on stage. So your competition is, you know, guys that I've done it for 17 years.


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[Assistant] You will be trying to get on the same show I'm probably trying to get on. We're all trying to get on these shows.


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[Assistant] Uh, so I, I, I don't know if I, I don't know if I'd make a big move. I, I think it's not bad to do, you know, I know guys are doing Zoom shows or make some videos, try to do some stuff creative, right stuff. It stinks, dude. This is just a terrible time. Uh, so I wouldn't do anything that's going to be hard to walk back.


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[Assistant] Go visit the city if you, uh, if you want to, but that, that's the only thing. I wouldn't make any sudden, sudden big moves because of that, but good luck to you and don't give up on it. Don't quit. This is, this is one of the times that it's, you're going to think.


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[Assistant] You know, this would be a perfect excuse so you can tell everybody, I tried it. I just didn't hold out. Everybody's having to hold out. So you hold out and just keep writing, keep trying to come up with stuff. And then when you're ready, just hit the ground running and, uh, never stop.


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[Assistant] John Hans, hello folks! I've been playing the YouTube version of the show in the background on our living room TV the past few weeks. My wife doesn't really pay much attention, but she catches the highlights because she loves Nate and hears me laughing all the time.


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[Assistant] They don't look much alike, but you can tell just, you can just tell he's Nate's dad by the way he acts.


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[Assistant] I couldn't explain air insulation, so he is difficult. He's officially just your neighbor who's quarantined and has nothing else to do but drop by and talk on the podcast. I don't know how long I can keep this joke going, but I'm literally dying every time I start the show and I would bet good money. You guys could read this comment on the show and say my full name.


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[Assistant] And she still wouldn't catch on. Please give it a shot. Let's see how long I can make my wife think.


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[Assistant] Braden is Nate's dad. Love the show. Highlight my week. John Hans.


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[Assistant] Let's see if she heard that one. Hello folks, John Hans. John Hans here. Uh, that sounds like a good sports reporter name. John Hans. John Hans. Hello folks, John Hans here.


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[Assistant] Uh, yep. No, it's not Phil Nance. Jim Nance. Uh, Phil Nance. That sounds like one of the, Phil Nance. What's up with breakfast is whistling. Oh, that's a brutal one. Uh, so.


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[Assistant] Alright, we're doing it. So this is the, that was a good, we got good comments. I know people probably talk about the last week's show, but, uh.


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[Assistant] What do you get? I'm not even a homerun hitter. One's one thing. Where do you get two from? Uh, it's a great, one of my favorite Seinfeld moments is that. It's so funny. Is Kramer sitting in there with that kid?


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[Assistant] Can I get that some orange juice? He goes after the first hit, he drinks this. By the way, let it be known, Kramer's a stranger to this kid. And this kid has let his, they let the, I mean a stranger sit in there alone.


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[Assistant] At the hospital with their child as they watched the Yankee game and the kid was in, he controlled the whole room.


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[Assistant] Weather is changing. Temperatures are changing. It's cold here today in Nashville. Last week was good. This week's cold. Uh, we have no front door. Uh, it's, if you, I explained that last week, if you listen to it, wife, our front door is gone. That is still very funny to me.


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[Assistant] Just for someone to knock on your door and then ask for the door.


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[Assistant] If you told me what you want me to take, I could have almost said anything.


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[Assistant] Just don't take the door, obviously, because we need the door. And that's what they came for. Uh, so, weather's changing, and we wanted to do an episode on weather.


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[Assistant] So that wasn't on TV? Uh, nah, I don't think that was on TV. Oh. Okay, it takes the thunder out of it.


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[Assistant] Uh, watching George's home videos. I'm just trying to change you. Would you like eight? Uh, you were, were they, were they on TV or they were just, they were on TV, the college TV.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So they did some stand up on a TV shows, TV taping, did it at Zany's. All real done taping cameras. I mean, you know.


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[Assistant] How would I watch it? What would you tell people? Go to channel 4.5.


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[Assistant] But you gotta have, uh, that's the butt. That's a good channel. 4.5. You're like, that seems weird. Never heard of that being called a channel, but yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, that's, yeah, it's not too many hoops. So basically- That's locally though, 4.5. Get your- So if you're in Nashville, and you want to watch them on the Circle network, uh, get rid of your cable. Here's the first thing I need you to do. Yeah. You gotta have over there- Throw your DirecTV out in the yard.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Switch to TV, you'll see real scrambly. You're like, well, that's not good. Yeah. Hang on. Go to, you know, we're four, you know, channel four and channel five is? I need you to go right in the middle of that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, so it's like, so there's people that just know how to get to this channel. There's like an audience that watches this channel because it's the Grand Ole Opry channel.


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[Assistant] Has anybody, anybody text you that like saw it, like randomly? Uh, one person told me, but no, I didn't, I didn't get paid that. I had one, uh, a thing in Boston on Nesson, New England Sports Network, and they did a comedy show. We just did jokes about, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, uh, from the movie in the eighties. Yeah, kid and play. Kid and play. And one's a comedian. I didn't know that. Yeah. I think the.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The Blackman County. Uh, it's the, yeaah. So I don't, yeaah, who's, is he, that's Kit.


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[Assistant] Anyway, so he wasn't even there, I don't know what I'm talking about. Uh, no. He, uh, he's a comedian. And he went on, I had to follow him.


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[Assistant] He had a rough go at it, let me tell you that. I don't think he's much of a comedian. And so he was pretty bad, like he was just like jumping around, like he was...


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[Assistant] It was like they told him like, do stuff on sports and he's like, every joke's kind of just got sports attached to it a little bit, you know? I was flying the other day, they had a sports game on TV. Anyway, can you believe they're selling the peanuts and the thing? We were watching the sports, everybody had a playoffs run. Can you?


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[Assistant] What is up with these flight attendants, you know? This girl comes by, peanuts, and then some guys watch a football towards the front. And then, like that's how it all gets kinda.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's one way he's including sports. Ah, because the other day, ah, my wife's cheating on me. She, I went to, we were watching baseball, doesn't matter. And the other day I go home and did my, my kid who doesn't like sports, but he just keeps saying,


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[Assistant] I, you can, I do love, cause I do it too, I always love the thing that, that comics do is if, if you got a seasonal joke, how to get it back around. And, uh, like, cause you can do it, like, I mean, it's in peak form when you're, you got some great Christmas joke and you're like, Christmas season's coming. You have about.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's probably November to February that you could say Christmas just happened or Christmas season's coming. Where it's the joke that seems timely. And then those other months, you gotta like, you know, what's your favorite holiday? Mine? Christmas. And then you gotta find a new way to do it. I love seeing that.


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[Assistant] I've told it on this. I've, I think so.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I'll tell, if I've told it, I'm sorry. My favorite of that kind of moment was, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The, when I first, when I was first starting, I started, I moved to Chicago first. And, uh, when I would come home,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would then do, I never did comedy before here, like I said, but then when I came back, I would be the guy that came back from Chicago, I'm doing comedy in Chicago.


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[Assistant] And so we'd go to the bar car, which was, they had this open mic. And I'd always, every time I came back, I would go up and do those shows. So this one guy, sometimes I would, and one time I came, when I came back in between Chicago and New York, it might've been during that time, but I lived, I kind of just lived here for four months to save money to move to New York.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so I'm back here. We're doing the bar card. This guy has a ponytail. He just did, we're open mic'ers. So no one, everybody only really has maybe three to five minutes of material.


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[Assistant] And so we're all doing our jokes and he would just do jokes on ponytails. That's all he did. He had a ponytail. I don't remember the jokes, but he's like talking about having a ponytail, what it's like having a ponytail. Full five minutes of just ponytail material. So the next week he shows up, his ponytail is gone. He has no ponytail. He cut it off.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so we're like, what are you gonna do? All you've ever done is ponytail stuff. And he was like offended that we asked. He goes, I have other stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And we go, okay. So they brought him up. He opens it. First joke he does is not about the ponytail. It's about nothing. It bombs hard. And then he goes, so I used to have a ponytail and then just does all this ponytail stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The other one I, did I ever talk about this? I don't even remember, uh, the happy birthday to Ru, like, did I ever say that story? Uh, it's probably offensive, I don't know. It's not my joke, but when I was in New York, this comic,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He used to run, we would run at Improv, a Broadway comedy club now. We, Dustin Chafin, who's about to have a, actually, uh, has a Zoom, uh, I don't know what it was, has a Zoom special out that he's putting out actually now. Uh, cause this is coming out next week and I think it's coming.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pre-Sales, uh, was just last Friday, and so it's coming out, uh, now. Zoom Comedy with Dustin Chafin. Go to his, his, yeaah. So, uh, it's not that, but yeaah, it's Twitter.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so, uh, I'll promote it to you next week, but he, uh, I started with him, look, I'm the main first.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're trying to find it online if you're looking, but I'll, I'll, I'll promote it next week, but he's a comic that I started with, and uh,


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[Assistant] He, uh, is putting out a Zoom, a Zoom comedy of 2020. It's a different way. Cause it's the way we have to do it now. So anyway, so we'd run a show at midnight. This, and it was this, uh, edgy, it was uncensored show, which I always had to do and was never, I never needed to be censored. So he, this other guy would run a show uptown.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he would always just come and like, if his show wasn't like doing good, he'd be like, hey, he'd like call me. And I was just running the show. I was helping Dustin run the show. And I remember he'd call me and be like, hey, uh, can I bring, we have like only three people show up for the show tonight. I'm going to bring them down to your show. And then can I get on stage? So he'd use, he'd like barter with me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe a couple times you'd be like, okay. But we were like, Dustin's show was like, I mean, it was like a packed, it'd be midnight, dude. And we would be sold out in this upstairs room. That was probably my favorite room in New York. It was just this box and it was just, I mean, when it was packed, dude, you would murder in there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was so awesome. And we'd all just be there. These are the stuff that I miss about New York is just, it'd be, you'd be out there till two in the morning and just doing these shows. Just so much fun. A bunch of comics hanging out. Everybody kind of ends their night there after they do shows. And so he would always call me and be like, and we just started being sold out. He's like, I got two people and I'm gonna bring them down. Can I get up? And you're like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's probably insulting. I don't, you know, it's, it's, it's a very hacky joke. So, but he would say, uh, if you went and had your birthday party at a Chinese restaurant, how would they, you know, they sing it happy birthday to Ru, happy birthday to Ru. Like that's the joke that they don't say, they say ours.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so he would start it and he'd be like, all right, who's got a birthday in here? One night we were not, there's not that many people here. He goes, all right, who's got a birthday in here?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he goes, nobody has a birthday in here. Nobody. And no one's raising their hand. And he goes, you, you have a birthday. He goes, my birthday was two weeks ago. He goes, what about you? He's like, my birthday is like seven months from now. He's like, nobody has a, and I mean, it's almost,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's just like, everybody's like looking like, just do the joke, man. Like, and he's like, nobody has, there's some, you know, some guy finally just goes, I mean, my cousin's birthday is next week. He's like, all right. All right. So if you took your cousin.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To have birthday at a Chinese restaurant. Here's how they would sing it. Happy birthday to Ru, happy birthday to Ru, happy birthday dear customer. And then everybody's like, okay. And then he's like, all right, good night everybody. And he leave. And so I just remember, I remember thinking why I don't want to ever do a joke where I have to have someone in the crowd go with it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, he doesn't at all. Hey, you've been trying to dress short and here's how they sing happy birthday to you. I mean, you could do anything, but he just doesn't. You're like, I mean, the joke's already just disgustingly hack. Like it's not a good joke, but it's like the idea that he has to bring someone in on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then someone's finally like, I mean, dude, people could just tell like, someone just say it's your birthday. This guy's not leaving and he's trying to leave. There's a Jay, big speaking to Jay, Jay had a story, Angel, Angel Sal, Salazar, Salazar. He was in, uh, Scarface.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's a comedian and he would always do that where he'd have some girl about, uh, Angel Salazar. And he would have, uh, he would always talk to someone and be like, Hey, big guy. Hey, big guy. He talked to, like, so he pointed you and he's like, Hey, big guy. You'd be like, Hey, what's up?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so he does it, and he always goes, hey big guy. And he goes, hey big guy, and no one's, the guy's not saying anything, and he goes, big guy. And the guy's like looking around, and he goes, hey big guy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's like, Oh, you mean me? He goes, Hey, big guy. And he's like, I mean, I'm not that big of a guy. He was like my size. He's like, I'm not that big of a guy. I just, I thought you'd be, when you say big guy, it's usually someone bigger. But Angel never talks to him. He just goes, Hey, big guy. And he finally has to go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay. He goes, you got a girlfriend? He's like, I don't. He goes, I don't have a girlfriend right now. He goes, you got a girlfriend? He goes, I don't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't have a girlfriend, right? He goes, hey big guy, you got a girlfriend? He goes like.


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[Assistant] Ten thousand times. And he's like a robot that just doesn't, he just can't.


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[Assistant] Sadly, he, he had, if you can watch the clip of that, you don't have to show the clip, I don't want to show it, but if anybody wants to look it up, they can't. Uh, but he, he like has a, he has major drug problems and had just lost it on stage. And so his thing, right, was


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[Assistant] Always like, hello, I am Moviefone. And I mean, this dude made a career, I mean, it is, he's very talented, obviously he can do a bunch of stuff, but would just tour around, sell out these places for a long time, made tons of money, but had major drug problems. And he was at Punchline Sacramento. I was there two, oh, the week after him. Oh really? And, uh,


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[Assistant] On just so much stuff, I mean, the, the opener has to go back up there and he keeps going, hello. I am, no, they want to hear it. Nah, they ain't everybody. He's like, you gotta go, man. You know, you don't know what's good. He's like, hold on. He just keeps doing the same movie phone joke over and over. That was the sad one. But it's like crazy to be like, you're just in this routine that that's what I'm always scared of being.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'ma just be up there in Starbucks and I went into iced coffee with milk and I'm just like in a corner just going, iced coffee, whipped cream, whipped cream, whipped cream, whipped cream. I'm just keep saying it over and over in some corner.


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[Assistant] You, I mean, that's every comic. You go, hey, this crowd's like terrible.


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[Assistant] Really? I would do it in heartbeat. If anybody does it and they do it at a high level, professional level and listening, you let me know. Yea. And I'll come do it with you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe that guy could be pretty fun. If that guy is into it.


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[Assistant] I don't know if there's any certification for any of this. Oh, there is. Oh, there is. So you have to go through the thing. Well, I mean, there's nobody going to stop you. I used to watch a show. I watched a movie about it.


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[Assistant] This, they were filming this, what was the show? Is it Storm Chasers? Twister? No. Yea, yea. It was a documentary. Uh, it's- I thought that was real.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now there was a TV show about storm chasing and during it, it showed them like how they all lived. They would stay in these hotels and they'd get up every day and go chase tornadoes. And they, it was on Discovery. It was awesome. And during it, they were filming, they were trying to film this 3D


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like they had a car that they're trying to basically get in a tornado and then film this IMAX version of this tornado. And so one guy that was a part of the storm chasers was with them being like, Hey, we're trying to shoot this as a movie. Can we go with you?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so they made a car, the guy had a car that was designed to like, when the tornado is over it, it goes down to the ground. It was almost like you could get no wind under it to lift it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, the movies played at, uh, the Huntsville at the Space Center.


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[Assistant] You'd see it like at a science museum or something like that. And I went and saw it. It was fun to watch it.


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[Assistant] And then go, oh, this is the movie that they were trying to make and I watched the show. Okay.


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[Assistant] Yeah. And that's, so you have to get certified. I would, I would love it. I would, you wouldn't want to go...


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[Assistant] I mean, see a real tornado man, that would just be like insane.


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[Assistant] I mean, it's kind of what the title is, is you chase the story.


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[Assistant] I think you're trying to, you're, you don't go away. And now if it comes after you, you're gonna move.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Some are doing it, like you know, the movie Twister, where they're trying to get something taken up in the... But I mean, there's people that are trying to, I think, get that close just to understand a tornado.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When you see them, it's always like most cars going this way and then one car going towards it. Yeah. And they're, and they're trying to get near it. And so they, they see a tornado. They're trying to go to the tornado. Justin Smith, who I was with, uh, who's with me on the one night only tour, he lives in Oklahoma. And so we were there when the tornado came. Uh, and I know I say tornado.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I know you're going to say Winda. Colorado. This Colorado. Yellow. That was a beta. Colorado. Yeah. Uh, so, but he, so he, Tornado, and so he goes Tornado. Uh, or Tornada.


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[Assistant] Nader, Nader, this Nader came over to, uh, so we, we went, it was the big one that they had that like wrecked that town. And so I was there. I was at a comedy club there and, uh, side splitters, I think, or I don't forget they have there.


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[Assistant] So I was there, and the day before they had a tourney to go through one of the towns, I want to say Norman, maybe we're Oklahoma.


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[Assistant] It's like, do you see it? He's like, yeah, it's real over. He's like, all right, just do these. Like, all right. Well, I'm see. Okay. I guess I see it, but I guess you don't want to talk to me. Like would say stuff like that. Like they'd go, all right, we're going to come back to you. All right. Yeah. I'm the one out here. Uh, but yeah, go do whatever you want to go do. I mean, I'm the one that is seeing all of it would always like kind of say stuff like that.


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[Assistant] Right before they go off the air. And you're like, and she's really making it about this. He's like, all right, thanks Samantha. We're going to be back to you probably later. He's like, probably. I mean, I'm the main person here. I don't see. Okay. All right. And then it just would cut off to the next thing. Uh.


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[Assistant] But we went and watched it, and then I flew out that next morning.


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[Assistant] And I remember how to fly out early. I don't ever fly out early. I'm, I'm usually like a, I try to be like a 10 AM to noon flight guy. And, uh, I had a, I left at like, I didn't, I didn't go to sleep. I just went to the airport and left at 5 30 and, uh,


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[Assistant] That big one came through that day. I would have never got out. Wow. I mean, I like, you know, I'm not saying I would have died, but it would have been, I would have been stuck. I mean, that came through. It was, it was one of the worst, you know. Wow. But you have the, the one, the big one here.


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[Assistant] This earlier this year? No, not this year. The, there was one this year, but then the one in, uh, there was one at night. That's the craziest one. We had one come through Williamson County at night, you know, and a lady died that those are, that's the scariest thing on earth. Cause you don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When will he be able to show this footage? Will Brian not allow it? We'll see. Breakfast is like the MLB. He doesn't want his own footage to show. Why is that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's like the, that's like the tornado. You're tracking it by the explosions. So you don't know where it's at until you see an explosion and the explosions happen because of it. A tornado at night is, you don't even think about it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause it's, I don't think they're like super, super common. Yeaah. Right? Alright, we can mute it and just, uh, it's like trying to talk to someone on the phone when they're in the wind. You ever call someone and you're like, ah, okay, I can't, and they're like. I mean, it's footage


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That I shot myself. Was that, did it show the tornadoes? I saw the explosions. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's, I saw the explosions, that was the tornado, right? Wasn't that it? That was it going through there. Yeah. Yeah. And what else happened after that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Are they destroying everything? Yeah. In the path? Was that the rest of it? The one that you're so mad at me for not watching the end of it? Is that what I missed? This is so funny. Like I have a first time experience of you just moved on, just kept talking about other stuff. No, no, I talked about it. We watched 20 seconds of it. Then it was just wind noise.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, there's a lot going on. You can rent this apartment on Airbnb.


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[Assistant] We've had it with my high school, Donaldson Christian Academy, uh, has been hit with a flood and a tornado. And so the last one that came through this year just ripped my high school up, just ripped it up bad. And we're trying to do a show for them and then COVID happened. They just really got dealt a bad hand.


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[Assistant] And uh, I know everybody's still there and so it was brutal when I drove over there. And if you go through, you know, I almost.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I took, uh, my daughter and it's almost like not a bad, you know, I don't know, it's, it's all a bad thing, but like for a kid to see, I don't know, maybe you could go do it different ways.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I think it's like good for them to see it. Right. You know, just to be like, look, this is serious. You know, look, these people, which we noticed is it's always the, in the bathroom, the middle of the house is always up.


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[Assistant] In most places. It's kind of crazy to think like, like you see a bathtub and then maybe the wall's in the middle. And these houses are level.


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[Assistant] I mean, just level, not, you know, we got some wind damage on the roof. I mean, the whole thing's gone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, we had, I remember the, so the one that came through Nashville my senior year in high school, 97. And, right? 97. 98. 98. So.


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[Assistant] I've been right in the middle of volunteer state community college, getting no credits, taking speech. And we, I remember I had to go pick up, we had one that came, it came, it came down, uh, God, we've had a bunch of them. I actually remember another time one came down our street, an old house we used to live on, but this one was a huge one that came through Nashville.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I'm joking. If there's a video of that, show that video. Uh, they, maybe it won't be at night. This one was during the day. But so, I remember watching this one, so I was in 1998. And I remember my, it came through, uh, Old Hickory.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I always think Andrew Jackson's house, the Hermitage, all these trees used to not be able to see the house from the road because there's so many trees and now you can see the house. And I always thought that was like, that's so crazy. It took that many trees out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We, I remember my mom called me and was like, go get, I went and picked my sister up. She was in elementary school and I went and picked her up. And then my aunt, I think was at our house. Maybe I don't remember.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now, it was me, my brother, and uh, my sister, and I went out back and was filming. Trying to see if I would get anything when it was like happening. And I mean nothing, nothing came up directly over near us to really see it. But you were at Channel 5.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've never seen this on the news. Uh, if you're watching this, we'll post, again, we'll post some of this stuff in the Instagram stories or in, uh, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right through downtown. Wow. That one was crazy. That girl's trying to open the door and they can't get it open for her and the train is coming down the street.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You were there. You were in that building. Yep. And was it just like a train?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When you're, you know, when you're, that kind of stuff, it's so helpless.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's just something coming through. That's what's so crazy. It's such a, there's nothing you can do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anything that, you know, obviously a robbery, like, I don't know, there's just stuff, you can stop it. There's things to stop. Fire, you can put, you know, I mean, there's nothing to do with a fire as it's roaring, but there's at least hope, like there's something.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A tornado, for some reason, like, earthquake feels the same way. When you feel an earthquake, the whole earthquake was the most helpless I've ever felt because it's everywhere. You can't run from it. You can't not, you know, you can step here, it's there. You can run.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Half a mile during an earthquake, you go fill up that whole half, like that's- Was this when you lived in L.A.? Yeah, when we went to L.A. We felt one in New York too, and then New York, what happened, Laura was working in one of the big buildings, and she felt it. But the one in earthquake, the first one I ever felt was wow, man. I mean, it was unbelievable. It's, uh, filling an earthquake, there's, you know, people in California don't even think about it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I hope this plane flies right into a mountain. You just hope that this earthquake sucks us all under.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's, uh, yeah, these tornadoes, uh, the craziest ones, uh, where's the one in Missouri? It's the biggest one. Yeah, Joplin. Joplin. Joplin goes through, I mean, this thing is enormous. It's, uh, you know, I think it's like a quarter of a mile. That, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, it's the big, it's a E5, is that what they say E5? EF5 Tornado. And I mean, it's just like, it's so big that it's.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like that's not it. Keep, just scroll through it real fast and see if you just see. It's so big that it just looks like dark clouds. Like that's how big it is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe we're do that as the Nate land, you know, we need someone to come with us. Nate hunters, tornado hunters, tornado hunters, tour Nate Earth. What do you guys write in the flying penguin? And then we have a penguin that we drive in. That's that's that's shaped. Yeah. That can handle the wind.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You can leave three weeks before you say it gets here. I have a joke about that. It's got a heads up notice of, Hey guys, there's a 20 that's out in the ocean bothering nobody. We think it's going to come here in about a month. If you guys could, you gather your stuff. Some of you could probably sell your home. You have enough time to sell your home. That's my joke. Is it what you say? Yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, if you go down there and stand in the, in the field of winds, I think it's, it, it does, it's relentless, the hurricane. But again, you're putting yourself in it. So that's why the fear of it. I don't understand. Tornado just happens. It's there. It's on top of you. So, you know, but hurricane, you have to go put, you can avoid a hurricane for the rest of your life.


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[Assistant] No, I know. Yes, the odds of, but your odds are just, your odds of a hurricane is zero. As long as you don't go dry near it. But a tornado, you're always walking around with the odds of a tornado can happen. It's just on the table. Tornadoes can happen.


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[Assistant] Pre-portioned ingredients and seasonal recipes delivered. Skip trips to the grocery store and count on HelloFresh to make home cooking easy, fun and affordable.


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[Assistant] This is why it is America's number one meal kit.


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[Assistant] Uh, don't let recipe boredom strike, because Elfish has tons of options, as large as this, all the time.


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[Assistant] Dig into their biggest menu yet with over 45 dinner options to choose from weekly and even more market add-on items that suit any lifestyle. This time of year, everyone's looking to revamp their eating habits. Look to HelloFresh wholesome health forward options like over 30 calorie smart protein smart recipes each week.


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[Assistant] We love it, uh, we love the burgers and the bowls the most. Go to HelloFresh.com slash NateLandFree and use code NATELANDFREE for free breakfast for life.


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[Assistant] One breakfast item per box while subscription is active. That's free breakfast for life at HelloFresh.com slash NateLandFree with code NateLandFree. America's number one milk kit.


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[Assistant] Uh, do they have them? They, I don't, uh, I'm trying to think if New York's ever had one. They have hurricanes, but uhm.


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[Assistant] I think they have them so. I think everybody's got something. That's what's crazy. Everybody gets something. I don't think like California gets tornadoes, I do think.


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[Assistant] No, I don't think so. Do Californians get tornadoes? Look and see if California gets a tornado. West of the Rockies. I don't think West of the Rockies. Uh, but they get earthquakes. Yeah. That's crazy. Everybody gets a thing. I think New York had a tornado.


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[Assistant] 2010. Average, they had 11 tornadoes.


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[Assistant] Wow, California, what, what did it say about Kansas? Averaged 62. 96, Kansas. 96, that's so many. But I guess that's all different sizes. Right. Uh. And most of them don't touch the ground. Yeah, most of them are pretty weak, right?


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[Assistant] Most are pretty stupid. That's what I would say. Right, Aaron? I'm trying to put a positive spin on this, dude. No, I'm saying that you're, you're like, you, you don't, you, you don't respect tornadoes. I hope a tornado follows you home tonight. I hope it drives right behind your car. Then I just go, I just go kind of.


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[Assistant] Hurricanes are, it's, you know, I mean, hurricanes are bad and people stay, but a lot of times when it happens, they either look, they can't move.


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[Assistant] Uh, their circumstances, they go tell them, even Katrina, they tried, they were getting everybody out. I'm just not saying, it tears up a whole town.


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[Assistant] Hurricanes do way more damage. But as far as a human being dying, I mean, a tornado just could pop up on us right now. It could be right behind, is there one right behind me right now?


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[Assistant] I mean they give you that easy that you just don't look. He's always just looking and coming. They come out of nowhere. Think about the ones at night, dude. It's at night. That one that came through Winston County. I remember we.


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[Assistant] We, Harper's asleep, uh, we just went in like the middle closet of the house and, uh, we just kind of sat in there because we didn't know how long it was going to be. And I was watching, it's like,


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[Assistant] I'd say I've never, I don't, uh, I don't know if I've felt one here. I don't think I've felt one here either.


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[Assistant] East of the Rockies won't. East of the Rockies. So we're good, East of the Rockies. Yeah. But if you're in it, it's like all of California feels this. Oh yeah, all the West Coast. Yeah, every state, every part, and it just is like, is it one cra- is like just gonna, everything's gonna fall down.


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[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah. That feels like a very loose thing that can. Well, I know. Again, scientists could have just, you know.


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[Assistant] Yeah, cause this is what scientists are gonna do. You know, I could just go out and be like, you know what, Seattle will become San Diego and San Diego will become Seattle in a thousand years. And you'd be like, ah, that's crazy. Because yeah, I'm a scientist.


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[Assistant] I've studied this. You're like, how do you study that? Did you look it up and stuff? He's like, no, I am the look up.


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[Assistant] What I write is the look up. I'm the source. And then how are we going to, you know, is there any, is he going to get in trouble if that doesn't happen? Making outlandish things. It's a six, it's a, it's a six hour drive. It's going to be right next, right now. San Francisco, the Los Angeles is a six hour drive.


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[Assistant] It's gonna be next to each other. When? Just long enough that you won't be alive to prove. Like that's, that's always the...


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[Assistant] A thousand years. That means if you, you could never have your family.


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[Assistant] Like I would want to now, I'll tell my daughter to tell her kids to be like, don't stop this chain.


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[Assistant] And I won't be here, none of us will be here, but I want, in a thousand years, I want a Barghetti.


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[Assistant] A child could draw that on a map. I could go get a kid and go, just draw me what you think the world looks like now. I'm going to put it on a website next to my doctor name and tell people this is what it's going to look like in four million years. And everybody goes, oh man, we should listen to that guy.


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[Assistant] That's like the weather, you know, we talk about weather people, they always get yelled at, weathermen, uh, they get yelled at because they get weather wrong. But I always think,


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[Assistant] Some reason to me, I'm like always, I'm very lenient with that. I don't ever get mad. Like, it's like, what do you want them to do, man? They, people get furious and you're like, yeah, dude, I just, it, it, you know, it's a good gauge.


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[Assistant] You're usually going to be happy because it usually means it's supposed to rain all week and it didn't. So you're like, oh great. But back off these weather people, man, like give them, they're doing what they can. Predicting the future. Yeah.


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[Assistant] Yeah, everybody's at the top. We're, so we're living on the North Pole.


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[Assistant] Africa, still gonna be hot. Can you imagine they go, ah, is it gonna cool down a little bit? You're like, actually, you kind of probably get hotter. And you're like, what dude? Like, I mean, everywhere else is going to be north, like we're going to be so cold. And Africa's like, you know what? I, I wouldn't hate it. That's what someone says in Africa. I wouldn't hate it.


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[Assistant] You can't yell at us about global warming and then this is the deal. This is, you're like, well, what's your answer for it? We're going to dim the sun or whatever it is. It doesn't make, I can't imagine.


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[Assistant] Shooting gases up in the air. Isn't that the main thing? The problem? We got too many gases in the air and they're like, I know, but they're not these gases. Uh.


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[Assistant] I mean, unbelievable. Can you imagine if someone floats that idea at a science table? That just came out. That just came out. 2020. That's not some drunk scientist smoking a cigarette in a lab, you know, where the doctors gave


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[Assistant] Like a baby was born with a cigarette in his mouth, like, but there was no rules. That's 2020. That guy's in the middle of a pandemic.


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[Assistant] And this is what he's gotten to. You know what? What if we dim the sun? You're like, hey, why don't you not publicly let that get out that you said that? That's what someone should have said to him immediately.


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[Assistant] What'd you say? We should just turn the sun down a little bit. Oh, we're just doing knob and just turn it down. Install a dimmer.


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[Assistant] Who do you think did that? Let's say one of the names is Dr. Khan, the other is Johnny Red. Sounds like Johnny Red's idea. You're right. Johnny Red.


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[Assistant] What are you doing? What are you out of your mind? Dim the sun. You went to college. I mean like what? They're teaching you stuff. They're teaching stuff. There's not a dimmer.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, I would imagine if downtown Nashville had hundreds of snakes going through it, we oughta, I don't know, figure something's going on.


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[Assistant] I mean, we should look into it, maybe go buy some toilet paper at the store, but.


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[Assistant] You know, if I see Holly cowering in the corner one day.


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[Assistant] We see bison, he's got their suitcases that they walk down. You know, they always show a bison walking down the road. He's got his roller bag with him. You're like, where are you guys going? He goes, ah, we're just getting out of here. You know, kind of overstated welcome. You know what I mean? Make sense. And he's like, one of them's got his thumb out. All the bison's are holding their thumbs out.


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[Assistant] That's what's going to happen. That's what you're saying on the podcast. Where are they going to go though? Is it going to kill everybody? Cause the animals don't know. Should we follow?


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[Assistant] Sore is going to have about two weeks of being like, told you, told you we can do this. And then it gets real bad. He goes, all right, that was.


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[Assistant] I mean, I'd imagine sun's pretty hot. Sun's unbelievably hot. You can't get near it. And you're like, it's five times more. You're like, does it even matter at this point, man? If I can't get to the near, I need to know how much harder than an oven.


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[Assistant] See how I'm, I'm just saying use, they use examples that mean nothing.


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[Assistant] I like that you described it better. I would rather hear you on the news go, alright everybody, your oven's at 400 degrees. And you're like, God, that's kind of hot, right?


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[Assistant] It's hot. You wanna put your hand in there? No, I don't. Now imagine...


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[Assistant] 54,000 more than that. And you're like, golly dude, that's so hot.


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[Assistant] And then I can wrap my head around that versus it's five times the sun and you're like, wow, that's the sun. Okay. 400 degrees. Remember how crazy you thought 54,000 was a little bit less than that. That was in the sun less than that.


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[Assistant] There's no way. There's just, that's impossible. That's just impossible. A, I don't even hear crickets all the time. So they're not- You gotta have crickets. Huh? You gotta have the crickets to work to work. Are crickets out now? They're not out in the cold. It's cold. So what do you do?


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[Assistant] Well, now we got to start over because you just talked and I lost track of the cricket chirps. So if you want to go, maybe don't talk while I try to count these cricket chirps.


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[Assistant] Well, when you make something up, you don't have to have anybody figure it out. I mean, that's how. When you just, some guy says that. I don't know if that's true. You know, you can't sleep with your feet in socks because they can't breathe.


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[Assistant] That's my joke that my dad told me when I was a kid. I don't sleep my socks on my feet. That's not true at all. But that sounds like I could say that you'd be like, wow, your feet can't breathe.


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[Assistant] The real thing! That's a, that's a number that would be tough to get to. 10 seconds, you'd be like, I have the time for that. 14, you're like, I'm not.


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[Assistant] And you could always be a little bit off, cause if you were 15, you'd be like...


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[Assistant] Well, one place I read 15 seconds and then add 37.


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[Assistant] I mean, that's the same. So like, that would be, uh, so 14 and add 40. So you're like, ah, you could just do 10 and add 46. You're like, what are you doing to me? He goes, uh, or just do one second and add 61 next to it.


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[Assistant] And then the other guy goes, well, I'm supposed to be four, you're doing my 14th. That's like, uh, three minute abs. And, uh, he goes, no, everybody does five minute ads, man. There's something about Mary. Yes. I'm about Mary. I'm doing three minutes.


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[Assistant] How do they know that? I don't know, you gotta get a little ballpark. I mean that's 45 minutes to one hour, you got a 15 minute window.


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[Assistant] Hold on. No, don't start. Alright, I got it again. I gotta bet. I gotta bet. I gotta bet.


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[Assistant] Yeaah, we're gonna let you get to this. Uh, they, uh, you're about as on the tip of your tongue as a snake. And they, on the flip side of that, is, uh, but that should definitely be in your argument to go, pythons are a problem now.


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[Assistant] No, Hurricane did. Oh, by the weather? You wish. Much worse. You get paid money to catch these snakes. Guys do it. It's like maybe 500 bucks or something. Yea, it's a lot. A snake. I mean, guys just go out and...


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[Assistant] Okay, cause they gotta get em, they gotta get em reigned back. It's too much. They're destroyed. They have no predator.


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[Assistant] Is there how many, like, do we have any live, you know, I don't know, is there, I did a joke about tigers. Is there any tigers in the wild in America that are in the wild?


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[Assistant] That they would know? Not in America. Oh, that got loose somehow? Yeah, they maybe got loose and then they become...


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[Assistant] Like there's gotta be any, yea, any ant like, you know, lion or tiger, is there anything that's not supposed to be here? That's just, that's not in the zoo or didn't, but like now we just think, like does America,


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[Assistant] Oh, that was from a zoo. But yea, so there's no like, cause they would have to just, you just gotta tell America, hey America, we live with a tiger now and we don't know where it's at.


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[Assistant] Well if it's in the wild, if it's missing. Yeah. Usually they find those. Yeah. But I mean, I mean this one would probably have to get like that.


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[Assistant] That'd be very, you know, the, that'd be the crazy news thing here. My craziest one I remember hearing was in Arizona. Uh, I might have talked to this, I don't know, I talked about a lot of stuff. But they, uh, was when they said, don't go to Juarez, Mexico. It's a lawless place. It's a lawless town.


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[Assistant] And I remember I was next to Juarez cause we were, it was like when I was 21. And then they, so I sat on their local news and they say, tonight, everybody don't go to Juarez. It's lawless right now.


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[Assistant] And that's always stuck with me. It's the craziest thing I've ever heard on the news. Yeah. Just to be, hey man, don't go. They can murder you in the street. Absolute chaos. And nothing, nothing will happen to you. There's no police there. It's just craziness.


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[Assistant] I mean it's up there, it's asking for it. You think it'd be, you think it'd be.


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[Assistant] I know, but how much lightning is there? I mean, there's 300 earthquakes in Tennessee that I've never felt.


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[Assistant] I would think that the, like, the Empire Stippling is getting struck more than 25 times. That's not that many.


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[Assistant] I would think in a night, if you told me, you think if you heard his 25 times a night, you would be like, oh, I believe that during a thunderstorm.


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[Assistant] So now we're listening to, I mean, that should be the, that should be out the gate. I would enjoy the information more if I would have been told, this is my neighbor. Who said this? My neighbor. There's, uh.


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[Assistant] Well, still an almanac. Uh, I think, uh, I don't even know what y'all both were talking about right there. At all. Have you ever heard of it? Poor Richards, I thought it was a bar. Isn't that a bar in something? That's the bar in the office. Yeah.


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[Assistant] It's like, you're so far away from something the shape of it looks like.


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[Assistant] I talked about Sundog, cause they just saw the UFO. Yes, now. Oh, what? You don't know what Sundog is.


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[Assistant] I mean, we got chirping, you count how many times a woolly worm farts and add 50, and that's when you can tell.


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[Assistant] So this sundog, obviously, and then this UFO comes at it and then no one brought it. I was like, well, what's a sundog, man? Like, let's back up a little bit. Yeah, that's just, and it was square. It's, yeah, it makes for the sun. It's not as, you know, UFO spotted during sun, uh, sunset.


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[Assistant] Yeah. Uh, alright, we're about to be, this is where we, is that all the weather stuff? Weather, there's probably a ton more.


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[Assistant] There's a ton more here. Is there any other fun, like something crazy?


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[Assistant] Been a busy 100 years. Yeah. Seattle was more of a Russia thing. Go ahead.


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[Assistant] Yeah, and it's just when it exploded, and then everybody, I don't know why, I feel like I should have heard about this before. Well, it was a long time ago. I know, but it says,


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[Assistant] I can't imagine anything that the whole world could hear.


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[Assistant] Yeah, that's what I mean. Is it like, they just registered the sound? Or am I watching TV and I just hear...


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[Assistant] And you're like, what was that? Did you hear something? Did you hear something? He moved the TV. Oh, that was Krakatua in Indonesia.


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[Assistant] And then everybody just went back about their day. They didn't go, well, that's crazy.


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[Assistant] So if you were near it, if you were near it, you could, it would just almost kill you. Yeah. Would the sound just kill you? Would it like just shatter?


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[Assistant] You know, I'll be honest with you, I don't know if he even heard the sound cause he died so quickly in the lava. The lava was so hot. He had his hands over his ears. Upset that he didn't get to hear the sound. I know him and he would have been the guy that's going.


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[Assistant] Should we, what's that volcano that might explode?


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[Assistant] Should we just live on it? Because...


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[Assistant] That means like, you just go when it happens. When it explodes, you're like, it's over.


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[Assistant] It's like, what are you gonna die? A year after it happens? Slowly? Or just get, get up in it. And then just when it happens, you're, you don't even know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Did y'all cover that at Channel 5 or was that more of a...


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[Assistant] Yeah, if you don't donate to Wikipedia. That's right. Hello, here at Wikipedia.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're the only things keeping Yellowstone crack attack from cracking again.


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[Assistant] Did they call it crack attack after it cracked the loudest? Is that what the name? Crackatoa. Well, crackatoa. It's where swords is from. Crack attack would be a better crack attack. Yeah, it was attack of cracking.


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[Assistant] Krakatoa, you know, when did they call it? Did they call that after it? It made a loud cracking sound? What are the odds? The loudest sound ever from something is called crack attack. Krakatoa.


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[Assistant] How would they know how loud it was? Like in decibels. Well, when you're a hundred years ago and no one can look anything up. 140 years ago.


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[Assistant] Uh, alright everybody, if you're listening to this, thank you so much as always. We love you guys very much. Leave your comments, uh, everything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] nateland at natebarghetti.com, right? Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, keep rating us. That rating us is huge and all those five star ratings we got will be like a, like a, you know, like you go somewhere, you gotta give us five stars. If you're not, don't do it. Uh, but do it. We love you very much.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nate Land is produced by Nate Land Productions and by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife Laura on the AudioBoom platform. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land Podcast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, it's great to be here. I, you know, what's funny is I have a lot of people who listen to my podcast or like my comedy, but they always say like, when are you going to go on NateLant? Like it's up to me. I was like, when I'm invited.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, this is, uh, he did, uh, a couple arenas, uh, or he did a theater in Savannah and then we did, uh, the Civic Coliseum in Knoxville, Tennessee, which is where I'm from.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, it's complicated, but yeah, it's, it was just like, oh, this is a way to get out of high school. It was like four hours a day. I just wanted to get out. I was ready to be done.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so after sophomore year, you're like, I'm done with high school. Well, I was just like, ready to like hit the fast forward button and launch myself into light real life. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nah, I didn't get a swirly. I never gave a swirly. Swirlies were happening. That's not a myth.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I was trying to do, I was trying to put together like some Christmas jokes and then like have a, I'll pitch this to places for like, this is my Christmas, it's like 15 minutes of Christmas material. And one thing I did last year, I didn't do it any this year and I've got a couple left, so I may try it, but.


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[Assistant] It's almost like a play on Karnak, the great, you know, with the envelopes.


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[Assistant] But it's boxes that are pre-wrapped and I just hold one to my head. And I have somebody from the audience read the slip that's inside with the, you know, the, the setup for the joke. And I have the punchline. I say the punchline. So.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like I'll be like, I'll hold up one box and shake and I'll go, goodwill hunting. And then they'll open the box and they'll say like, describe your last minute Christmas shopping. Oh, okay. Oh, yeah. That's like the reverse. You have to learn to write in that format. It's really good. Will good will hunting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's how they do it. Sorry, this is how we do it here. We're not a very successful company.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I did the shows with Nate, uh, in, uh, yeah, in, uh, Knoxville, which that was great. And we had a day off too. So I got to kind of like goof around in Knoxville. You see, uh, my in-laws and stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, uh, I met a few school friends. They contacted me and were like, oh, we're going to be at the show. And then I was thinking like, okay, well, I'll, let's see, we'll see if they want to come down. And like, so there was time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was what Graham Kay, one of the other openers, he was, he was trying to like hype me up. And then he goes like, you're going to do, he goes, you know what? These people are going to love you. He goes, I don't get it. I've never understood your appeal. It confounds me. And I was like, thanks. And that was the last thing I heard before I went on stage. But no, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, but I had a friend, he came, he came down to the front of the stage and I went out like 30 seconds. I was like, I gotta go on soon, but it was great catching up and.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So it was cool. He was like, you look great. You know, and he looked great too. So that was good. I was able to go, you look great too. Wasn't that whole awkward thing of like, thanks man. We both looked, we both looked, we've both had surprising glow ups. That was really chilly.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You just, you look them right in the eye. You look good too. You grate your teeth and say it.


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[Assistant] And I went second and they had these, the arena is so old, they were having to heat it with these, those big forced air propane deals in the backstage and they're pushing it through the old vents and the thing, literally that's what they were doing. So it took all day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they're still going and I'm hearing the hum of them back saying like, surely these crowds hearing a little bit of this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so they're wondering around backstage and evidently somebody was back there in front of those, one of those heaters, one of the crew and leaned up against the fire alarm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So the fire alarm went off for like half a second before he could shut it off during my set. And I, you can't, like, I know people heard it. Right. It was doing this buzz thing and I was like, is that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so that was, and luckily it stopped right after I said that line, I was able to keep going, but if it had kept going, like I don't have a backup line to the stroke line.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's the thing is what if is an actual emergency. Yeah, that would have been.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The one thing about the 3pm show was there were people coming in late because there's traffic issues, which I was teasing. Now it's like, that's when, you know, you've reached a level in your career when your comedy causes traffic problems in a major city. But we're the 3pm show and people just didn't give themselves enough time to get there. So.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was weird seeing it's like, it was like that scene in Raiders where the light comes in through the rod and he knows where to dig. Like it was like that beam coming down, like an extra spotlight, but it was on everybody's and everybody's eyes. He's like, cut it out. God giving you the light. Yeah, it was.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It became a Twitter thing, like a trending topic of like arguing over dressing versus stuffing and what's better and what are the protocols. I saw it on Twitter this week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yes. I think of stuffing is like fluffy and dressing is like wet. You can almost slice dressing, like a cake.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And what is eggnog? Feel free to make it for yourself. Eggnog is the opposite. Eggnog is once, like people get so excited about eggnog. I'm like, if it's so great, why can you only get it one month?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But don't you think part of it too, Dusty, is like the stuff you grew up with. It's not like it's gone. It's just you grew up with a standard for dressing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so like somebody may make dressing that's their, whatever their family heritage. And you go, that's not, you call this dressing because your mom put more sage or whatever in hers. Like chili, people will argue about chili, but it's because they grew up with a certain chili.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Of course. That locks in. It's like a, it's like gets in your brain. You're like, this is real chili. You ain't got beans in your chili. Yeah. You freak out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, try to give skim milk to somebody who drank whole milk as a kid.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think modern day broccoli is a GMO. Like broccoli as we know it now is genetically modified. Like I think old broccoli didn't look like that or taste like that. But they did a good job modifying it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, one of my favorite ones that I just, uh, read about was that Ed McMahon was with Publishers Clearinghouse and gave out checks at people's houses. Yeah. He never did. He was with another Clearinghouse.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It saves a lot of money. When you're coming up as a comic, that saves money. But does it save money? Oh, I don't know. It does for me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well restaurants are way more expensive than they used to be for sure. They've gone way up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I used to go in, when I've been sick on the road, I'll shop. I'll go to a clinic, but do you give steroid shots here? And if they say no, we don't, then I'll just go to the next one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, just narrow it down. There's a drop down menu just for steroid shot people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like you only get paid for jokes you tell. Like you can't just be like, I don't feel it. You gotta do it. It's your job.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I've had shows where I go, this is gonna be a problem. I had one sinus infection one time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it was causing just this one eye to weep. Like I couldn't stop it from running. Wow. And I was like, I can't, there's no way. Every time I would like try, I just, I was going to just blot it through the show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I thought it would be River Health. That sounds like a hospital. Like a stage name. It's gotta be a stage name.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, River's a, River's a name. Okay, I know, but I'm saying River Heath. It just feels like a very Hollywood name, like Smae chose it for you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wonder as he's getting older, like if Dice does like special stretches, he has to like keep himself. He's like, oh man, I had to have rotator cuff. His rotator cuff went out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would go to school and like recite, like whoever was on Carson the night before, Chuck Yeager would be on there as a panel guest.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Then some com- would come on that's doing the Chuckle Hut the next Friday or whatever and I'd be like doing their-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just be like, but I remember Carson, I remember staying up and watching Carson's monologue. What's funny about Benny, I remember watching Jack Benny because when Nick at Night first became a thing on Nickelodeon.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then they would put on these old shows from the forties. So it'd be like Burns and Allen and The Jack Benny Show. Honeymooners. The Honeymooners. So I was, I was like an 11 year old. I was watching The Jack Benny Show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so it did kind of inform my sensibility. I remember knowing it was old, it was black and white. But I remember thinking it was funny.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know. Maybe. Maybe. I remember watching like you bet your life with Groucho Marx and the word of the day and all that and Groucho Marx.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But it wasn't like, that wasn't my, I liked Regan growing up, like Brian Regan, I think, I still think he's the best that's ever done. I think Brian Regan's just the best. But uh, yeaah, I mean, Tim Conway, I love Tim Conway, like, nah, he's not a comedian, but I'm just saying, watching the Carol Burnett show, like Carol Burnett was like royalty in my head.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it was so fun like watching something the whole family could watch. I think that's kind of what Nate has tapped into.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That like all whole families can come to his show and so you're gonna sell five tickets. Two people might have gone to somebody else's show. The whole family comes to Nate's show. And that's why it causes traffic problems.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's a great like slogan to put at the bottom of the poster instead of like PGG, just put like, look, they can come, but I would rather they not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just anybody. No, like I've been given advice before, like if you go into a room and you go, well, I know these 11 friends who've seen my hour are going to be here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like when Norm walks into Cheers and they all say Norm, that's, she had a Norm experience.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but do they know, and they know what you want to eat? Like the w the person who comes back to the room, they go, you, you want this again tonight?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There is a gas station cooler in the green room full of drinks. I know. It's unbelievable. It's crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wonder about that though, like if you get a therapist and they're like, you realize this isn't a fit, but then they go, well, you have fear of commitment and it's your problem and you always do this. They use it against you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Exxiety. It's like eczema with fear. I'm afraid of how much eczema I have.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sure. Is it just one Bigfoot or is it like Bigfoot meaning the species of Bigfoot? See this is why we need to get Kevin John. We need more info.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, the Algo hasn't found Chuck Yeager and connected you two.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, it made you feel like as a kid, like we can do stuff. If I'm a smart kid, I can hang with adults and be smart and impressive to adults.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It is interesting like parents having to do that math in their head of like which of these formats is going to be a long term. Cause you do have to do it. Like I remember there was like, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What was their Blu-ray and then there was a HD DVD and one of them was like cheaper to produce, but one was Sony and like the Sony branding was just to like VHS, like beta Hi-Fi. When I was a kid, you had beta Hi-Fi, which was better quality audio and the smaller cassettes and the machines were just a little more expensive.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And the technology was better though.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, but VHS took off, and so there were people I knew in my neighbor that had a beta machine. And I always imagine, like, if I ever met, like, a bitter person, I used to say, that guy bought beta. I would say it, I would think, like, they bought beta. It's, they never got over that trauma of, like, buying the wrong form and being stuck with all this stuff. Right. Like, I had a Sega before it went to Genesis. I had, like, an original Sega console. And then they stopped making them. So I was just stuck with this thing with, like, no new cartridges.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I remember getting an Atari. I remember, like, for some reason this doesn't make me sound old. I remember getting a stretch Armstrong though, where you pull the arms. Do you remember getting one of those?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. So I was 74. I was born in 74. So they were still popular when I was, you know, seven or eight. Yeah. I remember getting one of those.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I can't remember if he had like lore about him, like if there was a backstory, but do we need that back then? It was just like, Hey, this guy's stretchy. He's stretch Armstrong. We didn't need like a universe that he lived in. He could just pull his arms and go really far. I guess you're right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe he did, but I just think like now they would need like, what is the cartoon going to be about? Now it's just, back then it was just like, he's stretchy and then like four guys in a table were like, he'll be, we'll call him stretch Armstrong.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Would parents have been like, I'm not giving my kid this fat doll to play with.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. He blamed the armor. So yeah, so that's not your face. So the gun wasn't your favorite toy then. That's not it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What do you guys think about that? Like mechanical toys versus like everybody's getting digital toys now as a child.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you know they have like an, they're gonna be totally obsolete.