[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Let me tell you though, but there was one person, I didn't save the comment, there was one person that said, you know who you are, that mentioned that, did anyone notice that when this first, the first thing happened, the first, uh, you did not help, you did not


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh and uh, Morgan Barrett gave us some, uh, information. We, I didn't know, but you guys might know. Green turtles are friendly and other turtles attack on site. So when you guys play today, just remember that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, but I, well, no I didn't. He's just throwing it out. I'm just throwing it out there. I said Morgan said.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's Morgan! Take us to Morgan. Morgan's my source. Right. Uh, Paul Witzenberger says, So are you guys Manhattan or New England clam chowder? It's Tepans. Which one's white?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'd prefer, but the best out of, I've, the best out of the two that I've, I've had was, uh, white.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sammaby says, can't say I'm a fan, guys.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Far too similar to Ark, which might do some damage to that series as I am starting to get bored of it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This isn't helping. At least seven days to die had shotguns and zombies need to mix it up with some other genres like space.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Believe me, you're preaching to this choir when it comes down to space. We know we want space. If there was a space thing that we know we could jump in right now that had, that we felt strongly about it succeeding, and you guys, everyone liking it, we'd be preparing for it right now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know, but, uh, I don't think appearance can happen just because nobody, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, but a lot of people were playing it. That's the thing. That's the difference. Meaning, or not a lot of people playing them, but there were, there were people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that, there's, there's the difference there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, there's, we, well don't worry, that's the thing, like, we'll get into more trouble.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If we just, we could just die in more fun in different ways.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Can you just decide that? Cause I'd like to. I did. I'll grab me too. Done dying. Oh yea cool. We're the done dying brothers. We'll hang out with each other.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now, there were, uh, did you read people also saying like, listen, don't do this premiere thing or make it so that you don't have to wait 30 minutes for it or something?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it's not good to just put the premiere up right then and there and be like, hey look, or five minutes before, you don't think that would be better?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This way nobody has to wait for that long, they can kind of, maybe we should think about that for...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Think like a skeptic, of course, on the most recent episodes of StarTalk All-Stars, neuroscientist and host Heather Berlin.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you're worried about the growing tide of anti-intellectualism and the devaluation of experts and facts, which we're seeing all around us,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Tune in for a show filled with science and skepticism.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Remember, trust no one, question authority, and listen to Star Talk All-Stars wherever you listen to podcasts to get the rigorous scientific thinking you are desperate to hear. That's Star Talk All-Stars. Listen now wherever you get your podcasts and make sure to subscribe.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is like almost the perfect podcast sponsor for


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, now I'm gonna listen to him. It's really good. And absolutely likes him too, but he's not here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know if I talked about this already, but I went to a comedy show recently, maybe in the last like month. Where?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I like them a lot. Yeah, there's a lot of good stuff. But anyway, so there were three headliners. I didn't realize. There were five comedians all together. Three of them were roommates. They were from New York. Oh. Right? They each got 20 minutes apiece.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was great. Well, a headliner's supposed to have an hour. Yea, an hour. Right? And then you've got your two guys before that. An hour? Yea. Telling jokes for a whole hour? Yea, that's what you need to do if you're gonna headline.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, anyway, so they were doing, uh, they had, the first two guys came in, they were freaking great. I mean, usually the first one is kind of rough and they said, well, you never know what you're going to get, but I always, I love them all because they got the balls to do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, I'm like, alright, you know, but everyone was good. So the, so the first of the three headliners came up, and they all kinda talked about each other. You didn't realize what was going on. The one guy's talking about his roommates, then the second guy, 20 minutes later, I'm like, oh, cause this isn't the headliner.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Two out of three were fantastic, but you know that they rotated.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And the last one, the last one should have been first. He was good, but he was such a downer when it came down to, first of all, his energy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh and they got a podcast too. Can I go first? I'll plug em.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, barbed wire, barbed wire. Yeah, that's barbed, but they have barbed. And I know it's barbed, right? First of all, it's barbed. It's not barbed like Barbara. I thought it was barbed wire. Barb wire is short for Barbara wire.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Barbed wire. So if I say it wrong, at least I'm the only one that's here that's probably worked with it, including this guy who's...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, and you can't even, and you're not even supposed to put it on a duct. Right. It's not recommended for a duct tape, so why would they ever call it duct tape when you're not supposed to use it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I'd like to say something before you even go, do you mind? Sure. First of all, I very much enjoyed it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I thought it was really good. Yeah, I thought it was fun too. I thought, I think that that needs to be, we talked about, a few of us at least have talked about, uh, making that kind of a thing, we need to figure it out, making that kind of a thing where three people do play it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it bounces between on a regular basis just cause, first of all, I love VR. I wasn't even in that thing, but I think it's so much fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I disagree. I think that we could see more of this stuff. It's scary in particularly too. I think that's scary. It doesn't have to be Friday night, but scary stuff every other month. If there's a game to play.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, well I wanted that to say, well he's, Joe Rogan is better looking and more talented.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I did consider it, I did consider it, uh, about two weeks ago, and I realized that it was stupid. Oh, then you, okay. So.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 2% of our audience even knows who she is. Let's, let's go for that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Look, look, I was so touched by that, that I almost called my wife and said, hey, I need to drop a baby boy in you. But instead I thought about it, so I just went and got a Coke Zero.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I was like, awesome, I'm rooming with Adahab.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anyways, let me, let me really talk about Ridge Wallets. Slim, durable, lifetime guaranteed. Just go to RidgeWallet.com, check it out. As a matter of fact, go to RidgeWallet.com forward slash Neebs. And if you buy something,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wish every, yeah. They also have duffel bags, commuter packs, phone cases, knives. Duffel bags? Yeah, I see it right here. I'm looking at it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh god, we're silly. Can I start off the comments this time? I haven't started in a long time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay. So, I'm gonna start off the comments, and, uh, the first three comments are from Ark. The most recent one, the Raptor, surprise. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Tadanknight calling me out, and rightfully so. At 1347, Master Gamer Thicc44 trying to tame a dino with stone arrows. Retro. Have Simon and Thicc switched? PS love watching Simon's gamer evolution from not remembering simple controls to now remembering simple controls sometimes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I went back and watched it, and I'm like, oh shit, that was uh, yeaah, those were some stone arrows.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, if I did it was cut, I don't remember, we film a lot and so there are a lot of mistakes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I'm sure at one point in time, I'm sure during that I was like, shit, because I had a small amount of, um, stone arrows and a large amount of trinkets and I'm like, why am I running out? That's what I was asking. Oh shit. That right there. I'm saying, I'm sure I did that. Okay. Like, but I don't remember exactly if I did or not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anyways, alright, let's move on from this. Uh, Chris, the beastly one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, makes a good point. Why don't you guys use dinos as a team anymore? Before you all traveled as a cool pack and you all grew a bond to your dinos. Now we don't even know the names of most of your dinos and their deaths don't seem to matter because everything now is just expandable. Everything now is just expandable. Uh, I hope you guys read this on commenting on comments.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm, I'm going to say this, um, like Rosie.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Rosie's gonna be very important to us as a team, but like, amount, because Rosie's very big and slow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I do like, uh, laser face, but I don't really think I've found my mount yet. Do you remember Phil Collins? Yea, he was a low level. He was a very, very expendable. He was such a bright spirit though. Candle in the wind. Yep. Terrible breath.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, alright, well, Red, uh, Melonzo, commented on the same video, says, in bold,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Bold letters. My god, Apsro really loves to complain on game features, don't he?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you would just read, if you would just do a little research, you would know what explorer notes do. You would have boosted experience for 10 minutes after opening one, and your mount would have gotten boosted experience too if you opened it while riding it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, right now, like, right now I can't ride, uh, I can't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Put a mount on Rosie because I'm not high enough level. Had I known that, I'd have opened, yea, and then- Open the explorer note and then-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, next comment is from Damien McDallydally.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What a cool name. Uh, it's on the top 20 video. He says, honestly, I admire you having to deal with that whiny crowd. I would have left the room when they started whining and bickering and not paying attention and so on. I would have said, all right, fuck you guys and left the damn room. I would have.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would have cared about the video. I wouldn't have cared about whether or not the video...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would have left the damn room and ended the series. So good on you for doing what you have done. Although I don't understand why you didn't. It's the best part of the top 20, I think. Yeah, that's, it is at this point, especially since Battlefield doesn't do that well on our channel. You might as well, and it's certainly not planned. We enjoy going


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, but I'd like to end my comments on a positive note with Ethan Estep. This is from the same video from Top 20. Ethan says, some people don't believe in love at first sight.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But when my brother showed me Niebz Gaming, uh, around the time of the Railgun montage, I just knew something was different.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This was special and I was right. You guys have been my favorite YouTubers for a long time and I watch everything you do or everything you guys put out no matter what game. So just know that no matter what you're doing,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What is this? Like maybe he just says like you're like, you would just randomly add a mom joke on the end of anything. Like just to be kind of random.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's okay. Simon really likes to know what that tastes like, Nick. It happens. I still like soup, sandwich, and the cherry coke zero. Uh, this podcast is sponsored by...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and Absarov, I'm kind of the same way you are. I do have a list and it's, it's normally a pretty ambitious list throughout the day and if I, if I get all of it done, then yeah, it's an incredible feeling. It's like, yes, I've been productive today. And I get one of his treats too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You have to cook something. A lot of them say that. So I think that's the common denominator. So I'm leaning towards cereal not being


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm not gonna call cereal cereal anymore. I'm gonna call it breakfast soup. Breakfast soup is so much better.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I clean up like, like all my trash and stuff like that, uhm, and I make sure, yeaah, there's no, cause I don't normally care what people think about me, but I also want people to know that I'm not a fucking slob. Yeaah, I think- I'll wipe down a little.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We all gotta live here together. Let's make it look nice. Be like Anthony, keeping it in his back seat. Yeah. Like baloney wrappers and anyways. Or the back room.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Some sort of VR. There's a, there's a first person shooter called Pavlov. It's kinda like, uh, it's, uh, VR, CSGO basically. That's where they...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If I'm trying to get kills and not trying to hold my lunch in.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pick a comment. The one that I said, uh, the one, the very positive one. The positive one. At least the last sentence. Hold on. Here we go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just know that no matter what you're doing, you're making someone's day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Guys, we did it! We hit a million subscribers! We did it! Yeah! No, we didn't hit a million subscribers. But maybe one day. We can only try. You just watched Red Letter Media.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's crazy. I know, RFID blocking, slim, sleek, guaranteed for life, and also a part of history. Yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, ridgewallet.com forward slash NeebsGaming. Use the code NeebsGaming to get 10% off and free shipping. I can't, oh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There should be an indicator on the screen when, like, Simon's done with it. Like, at a certain point when he's like, you can just tell he's done recording. A pressure gauge. Yea, a pressure gauge. A pressure gauge. It could be fun. Alright, I'm done. I'm done. You have to feed him CBD for it to go down. That takes about 40 minutes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you're listening right now, if you could just, you know, maybe say a prayer for us and, you know. You know what helps?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's news about Dr. Disrespect, uh, Twitch has unbanned him. They have? Yea.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yep. I bet if you play final fantasy seven with them, just like you're just sitting with them watching. No, no, just, and that's a good bonding experience. Huh? The old one. You could do both. You could do either or.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just so I could get through to him because I want him to feel a lot of emotion. You know, so there's, there's, it's a roller coaster of emotion.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I love us in the right situations. Like what? Oh, like a comedy. Anything funny.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Forever. A song by Drake, uh, Eminem's on it. Oh, so they like made it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it was like BWAH! That's the first thing you hear in that Drake song.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah. So there you go. That's why we talked about it. But it's, it's in a funny part that's, that seems appropriate. Oh I'm sure it does. So I don't, I don't use it like, damn this sounds lit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, uh, start talking about, you know, you're working on the farm, you're doing all sorts of country things, but then you start getting, like, kind of technical with, like, technology, or, you know, fired up by Tesla, drove to the arcade, and you're starting to do all this stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because I listen to some country and who's the guy? Sam Hunt. Sam Hunt is a kind of a perfect example of the guy that Bo Burnham's talking about where, you know, he's, there's heartache, he's,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] His girlfriend's wearing his t-shirt and the same shit that you always see her, even though I kind of like Sam Hunt, but like, yeah, it's rich country kids.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, but I think there's a, there's kind of a cookie cutter aspect to it, to where they all kind of have the same type of songs and they all have the same look. Well not they all, but a majority.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah, he's great and I watched an interview with him. He spent a lot of time in Nashville just writing songs for other people. He's written like 10,000. When they asked him how many songs do you think he's written over time, he said about 10,000. Not all of them got published obviously, but you know, this is a guy that was just paid to write songs for years. He seems like a good dude. He's incredibly talented, yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean this is smart advertising right here. Yes it does. I love these guys. I haven't tried their product and I already love them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I can't wait now. I can't wait. I know. Yeah. Overnight shipping, Manscape. Do it. Get it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like graduating college and shaving my nuts with something that's not gonna nick them. I've only done it once.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Coming out now, you know. I used to have to get my chest waxed, uh, cause I did print ads, and sometimes I'd have to have my shirt off. You love to do it now. No, I fucking didn't, no.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hair all over except the fucking top of my head. But no, I like my bald head.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause you came in and you're like, I don't know what's going on with people commenting. They don't even watch the video. No, that's not what I said.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it is hilarious. Who's next? I'll go. So mine is from the most recent Sea of Thieves video from Poraco Basque. And this just tickled me when I saw it. I don't know why, but it says, lady at the beginning, tell no one what you're about to witness. Neebs gaming uploads to YouTube. That was funny.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What's a go-go, in-flight, whatever? Yeah, you gotta pay for that. Well, with, uh, my T-Mobile service, apparently that's free, along with international. Uh, shit don't work. Right, it's free.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's like a, he's like a bizarro Ted Nugent. I bet he's the guy that shows up with toilet paper at the party. No. Who wants to get nutted out?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Magnets. And that's great because electric cars are very magnet driven. That's how they work.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Electric car talk to interrupt real quick, did you see the new, uhm, the new electric car producer? No, who? Uh, Dyson.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That'd be amazing, actually.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But the, most of the trash is in the, the ditches. Right. So if they have a little side... Well it just shoots it out the back of the car behind you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just thought that was an interesting, uh, wow, I drive a Dyson.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's been a long time, ever since the rape camera was found, uh, I didn't, you know. What? They found like a, in the, in the bathroom or something. Okay. The fuck? What? I didn't mean for that to go there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're like, eh, I'm gonna throw it, give it to somebody. Here we go. I won't say his full name, but this was on W-E-C-T, I don't know, years ago, but man accused of secret peeping in a bathroom. It was the owner.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Same person. I don't remember. Oh well, that's a big deal, isn't it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe. I don't want any money for these. I just wanted to donate these CDs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kickstarter. 10am. Compete with prices right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Did she build a barn? No, not yet. The barn's not there yet. Simon built a museum at one point, you remember that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, I mean we did 60 episodes that I think are still highly entertaining. Yeaah. And remain that way, so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was fun, the fact that it fit in my backseat, the backseat of my car, the box. That's cool, it's a queen size mattress. Yeah, small car. Fit in the backseat, no problem. Pulled it out. What has it done for your dreams?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well. But my, but my sleep's really good. Okay. I've said before, and this is like the other, uhm, at a hotel or whatever, I still can't wait to get back to my sweet little Casper.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, I'm gonna go? Yeah. Okay, you're gonna love that I don't remember what video this is from. Okay. But I just like the comment from EXP versus Gaming that says, Neibs is the songbird of his generation.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One of my favorite things is this. It could be around survival. True. Yea, yea, maybe. There's danger. Crab. Crab. Seeing footage of uh, Bird of Paradise. And how they make their place set up there. Oh yea, they're great.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Planet Earth, is that what you're talking about? Oh my god, just that process is amazing to me. All to attract a lady. Yep, they like clear, they clean up the floor, the ground in that area that they're going to put on their show, so they get rid of clutter so their colors are more vibrant.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, this is from Professor Flick McSlippers. Uh, there are few things in this world as precious to me as the confusion of these beautiful human beings, especially Simon. I just liked how that was worded.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, this is from Graham Davidson. Also, Niebs, nobody actually cares about anybody else's dream. You'll never hear someone say, did you hear about that dream Niebs had? It was so wicky.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, he was bringing up something that never happens.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You make a good point, Graham, and don't listen to Nieb's shit on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like I get the chance to do that maybe twice a year. Like actually, like fully aware to the point where like I can play without waking up first. Maybe twice a year. It's like a nice little gift every night.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I gotta keep something, like, we should all do this, man. Fuck it, like, as simple as using, uh, just recording it. Yeaah. In the morning, like, hit that with a... That's the way to do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what we had. Yeah. That's true. MaxGamer42, this is Terratek. Conflict and comments, my last ones.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh god, please make more Terra Tech episodes. Every gameplay over Terra is from like a long time ago before all the updates and I love the new updates. Please make more episodes. LeakedBoss294, please don't play this game again.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This definitely doesn't work for this channel. There are much better games that are out and some still to come out. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're playing some comments. It's fun to play. I think so, there's a warmth to it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And have you seen the size of some builds? No.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Are they? I can't- I don't remember. Yeah, I'm wondering if there is a way to get in then. Yeah, maybe- yeah, dig. Can you-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Shoot turrets and slowly damage them to break them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know it's driving people nuts because I've got a few treasure maps and there's one that I activated but I haven't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No. I haven't seen it drop in a long time. That's my point. I wonder if people did.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There was a time Thicc and I were playing, I think...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was the second battlefront. I don't remember or the whatever, but it's like, it was a couple of months from coming out or maybe not, not even, I'm not sure, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She probably does, you don't know anything. No, she doesn't know anything. She wants to leave the room so bad when this is playing, but she can't. She just wants a baba.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hmm. So everyone's going to be shooting at optics. Pretty much. Maybe. Like it seems like the go-to. Why wouldn't you if it's gonna pretty much- Yeah, it's the easiest thing to take the tank out of.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Why? Poland? I've never been. I'd love to go to Poland.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's good at wiping up a mess. There you go. Use it as your nuttin' shirt.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Scrap Mechanic episode. Yeah. Back in the day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Really, we're almost at anything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There. I'm not using it. That's okay. No pop filter. Look at that!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You guys know what Daniel did? He showed up unannounced at my place last night, uh, uninvited, uh, stole my pizza, beer and whiskey.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Windbreaker Day would be right out the window. And then you crack cocaine all the scratching. Oh yea, I do itch. You do itch a lot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm going to raise my hand for this one. Okay. Can I create my own reality just like you did to make this even? Okay. Here's what the earth is. It's like two square miles of just ocean. There's a hundred people, hundred people. That's flat. Right. In this, in this, this is what Nibs does. So,


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[Assistant] There's a hundred people floating in this two to three square miles.


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[Assistant] Mhm. There's, sure there's sharks under the water, but it's also a storm. Mhm. Where lightning is coming. Sharks are gonna kill everyone.


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[Assistant] I would have hooked mine up last night, but they were doing the Far Cry DLC thing, so.


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[Assistant] They've got that whole, the Herc character is a big part of it, so his redneck ass is talking a long time. Yeah, that's, that's kind of my thing, I felt like it was all his voice. It was so much of it, that was almost overload, and I read a couple comments that were saying that Herc sounds kind of like Neebs. I did, I thought they were.


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[Assistant] No go for it. Apps or whatever do you have next?


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[Assistant] Well, it's online. It's just a horrible aspect ratio. It's like, it looks like it's...


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[Assistant] Uhm, this is, uh, from Drunken Bar Fight. I just have one comment from that. From Jack Wade. Nice green screen, guys. Worth every penny. Yeah, it's not a green screen.


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[Assistant] What would we do? It's just a background.


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[Assistant] Right. We need more of a wider, you know, cover the hole. Or get rid of it and just make it a nice background. Okay, uhm, so the next one, I think the rest of these are from, uh, Air Raid, Scrap Mechanic. Hooah! What? Air? What? That's Army, that's the Army version of Poo.


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[Assistant] Um, Kieran Humphrey says next you should do dog fights. We tried, uh, during that recording with, uh, Ada's, um, his little stunt plane he made. His little stunt plane.


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[Assistant] He had every... I gotta build my own plane.


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[Assistant] That's the way to do it. He had every button and they were all like linked to the number pad and he acted like it was, and sure, he could fly it. None of us could fucking fly it, like none of us could stay in the air so that was like-


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[Assistant] And uh, Ada, can you hear me? Yeah. I just wanted you to hear this. This is from Wolf says Ada hops looks great. Too bad it doesn't fly well.


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[Assistant] He had a, he could fly it really, really well until we were all in like the same server.


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[Assistant] So uhm, Swassles says, oh my god, who edited this video? The building is way too long. Tell me about it. To that Swassles, I liked that song a lot and there were four of us with building, that were building that had the footage.


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[Assistant] I just let it play out, but I tell you what, if I do that next time, I'll just say right as the building starts, like.


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[Assistant] Okay, I got, I do have two more. These are, these are kind of fun. Uhm, Random Stuff says, I feel like you guys are tools in real life. You go out in public and just act like the biggest douchebags. But you make amazing videos and that attitude is typical of celebrities, so it's not necessarily negative. What?


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[Assistant] I don't think I'm a tool. We're tools and we're douchebags in public, but it's expected. Yeah, it's fine.


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[Assistant] Yeah, maybe. Well, what was it? Five or six, what? Oh, uh, uh, kid, I don't know, maybe young twenties down to see his brother from Charlotte was at the barber shop I go to. And I just sat down, I didn't say, I said hi to the barber that was working on his brother's hair or whatever, and he was like,


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[Assistant] Video that we did. Even with the curlers in your hair? Yea, even with the curlers. Yea.


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[Assistant] How you like the perm? You're so attractive. Looks great. Thanks so much. I wish I could do that. Yeah, what a good, uh, what a good kid. And it was, that was the last time. And my last comment from Jacob Aguilar. This is from Scrap Mechanic Air Raid. You remember my demeanor in it, like all of ours. We had our thing. I was on Adahop's team and we had Absarow and Nibs together.


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[Assistant] Duralius, helpful tip, stop trying to make it all about you, especially in the Ark series. I only watch these scrap videos for the channel, but you seriously have no idea what you're doing in any game. So if the crew is mean to you, it's because it's your job to play video games. No excuses for you acting like a princess and trying to raise your voice when you don't know shit. Snap.


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[Assistant] Everything. Kicks, punches, elbows. I will do my best to not be so princess-like, I guess? And make every video about me?


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[Assistant] I mean, I personally think that we're so lucky to have such a warm community as a whole, like for the most part. So obviously you're going to have the, uh, the jabs come through.


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[Assistant] I mean, the earliest, the, the soonest, you can just, yeah, brush them off in every way, but it's still almost impossible. And so, like, if you read it, you're like, err.


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[Assistant] Thank you. Well there you go. Daniel, does that answer your question?


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[Assistant] He's gonna find it and do it now. That's wonderful. So this is gonna be possibly a return throw under the bus.


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[Assistant] I used the service, I thought it was great.


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[Assistant] You know what? Say it again. It was simple. Right, why? Easy to use app. I kinda checked my eyeballs with my phone, which was cool. Uh huh. And, uh, it's a very good service and it was incredibly cheap.


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[Assistant] I feel like it's a perfect sized crowd for that space, in my opinion. Is it like the mall at Christmas time? I haven't been to a mall at Christmas time in a while. It never seemed uncomfortable.


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[Assistant] But I'm just saying, some people break in different ways. Andy Kaufman, that was his shtick ultimately.


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[Assistant] That's the last comment. Hey, quick movie talk. Go. I saw, any of you see the death of Stalin? Nope. What a work of art. Where'd you see it? Shit. I rented it on Amazon Prime. Is it a new movie?


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[Assistant] Arrested development. The dad. Tambor. Jeffrey Tambor. Yeah, he's in it. And it's funny cause it's like all this, like the Russian, like obviously when Stalin, but, uh, a lot of these actors are Brits. They don't make any effort. Like Buscemi talks like fucking Buscemi. Like they're all, but it's, uh,


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[Assistant] It's a satire? It's called Stalin's Death and the people around him and it's fucking like, you can tell that all these quality actors, you can tell that they're dealing with such a good script that they just like shine. It was a pleasure and it's a period piece. It's called the Death of Stalin. And it's a satire? It's Stalin. Oh yeah. Okay, I'm in.


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[Assistant] He's, he's like a... I'm talking for this Joker movie. It's Todd Phillips who's directing it. Oh, nevermind. Oh yeaah. I was way off. Who's that?


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[Assistant] Absolutely comfortable. I am working on it. I'm working on it. Ada Hopp, put your pants back on. Simon's outside for a minute. Yep.


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[Assistant] I would, if I were to guess, I would guess no. If you broke it, definitely not.


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[Assistant] So, before you go to the next comment, uhm, this might be one of your comments, Simon, but I certainly read a bunch of people going, why didn't you wait until Alpha 18?


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[Assistant] We thought about it. We have thought about it. We did think about it. Personally, I feel like if Alpha 18 does come out, uhm, we should switch into that.


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[Assistant] Immediately. Immediately. Immediately. And then just come up with however, whatever the excuse for starting for, I don't, or at least finish the whole thing.


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[Assistant] You know, just to interrupt one more time rudely, uh, how we did find the Fates Motel, you know? I heard, or I read a comment that said there was also the Evil Dead Cabin.


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[Assistant] Promise me something, if one of you find the Evil Dead Cabin,


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[Assistant] Uhm, will you wait for me? Because I want to come so bad. I know that cabin well in my mind.


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[Assistant] I think you should be the one to find it. No, I would gladly go with you. I don't know how that's gonna happen. I don't know where it is, but just in case, you know.


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[Assistant] I feel, personally, as far as seven days go goes, it's great to be back, but I feel like it doesn't have the magic the first run. I don't think we're feeling the magic because, well, I don't think we're happy with a couple of the changes.


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[Assistant] The, the skill tree, still, I- That's what's gonna suck if 18 comes out. Right. You gotta start over on the skill tree. I haven't been really using my points because I don't know where to go. It confuses me.


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[Assistant] Yeah, and they're affordable. It's a good product. Black and Decker. They're for the rich. I mean, it's like right there.


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[Assistant] Oh yea, the Tesla update that puts Cuphead. Imma buy a controller then for that. You know, that'll make charging fun. Hmm.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I got to do one of those when I was in the Marine Corps and I got my Humvee license and we went on and there was just a big fresh rain that week and we were out at some landing zone and I remember driving the Humvee with there was probably like six other people in the back of it and it was my time driving. We were driving in this like little pond


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[Assistant] And it got so full of water that I was on my tippy toes.


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[Assistant] He tried to drive his van into water he should not have gone into. I'm scared to death of water with my car.


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[Assistant] Yeaah. Yeaah, oh yeaah, yeaah. Cause it just is a battery and that's not gonna be a winning battle, but uh, so I avoid it very much. As you should! Yep.


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[Assistant] I feel like being able to type a message that pops up.


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[Assistant] For the people behind you, that's a very practical thing.


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[Assistant] How much is a bar? I'm saying a bar of gold weighs more than a pound, right? Yes. I would imagine. I think they're kilo bars probably, like 2.2 or something.


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[Assistant] We need our gold back! You search one more thing please. How much does a bar of gold weigh? I don't know, I don't know. Or a kilo? I don't sell cocaine. Kilogram? You don't have to sell cocaine. 25 pounds! A bar is 25 pounds. So our 6 pounds isn't even close to a bar. Well it's about a quarter of a bar.


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[Assistant] 8,000 years with the w- 8,000 years. Especially then.


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[Assistant] When it's so hot and stuff, and like all these layers of thick, like, they really put a bunch of crap on.


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[Assistant] It's fun to see some of the judges like over in parliament and stuff like that still wear those. Not all of them.


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[Assistant] I know we're a gaming channel, but I'm going to pop back to the news thing because I thought it was.


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[Assistant] Definitely an interesting story this week, and I'm sure some of you've heard of it. The dude that drowned proposing to his wife.


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[Assistant] It really is. I don't even heard about it. This couple, uhm, they went and took this like the vacation of a lifetime and they rented this place. It was like $1,300, $1,700 a night off the coast of Africa. And it's like an underwater submerged, uh, uh, room.


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[Assistant] So they got it for like four or five nights and he...


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[Assistant] Dove down, without gear. I mean, he might have had a snorkel.


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[Assistant] Sean, why would you have that message on a piece of paper if you're underwater?


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[Assistant] And then have it all on one side so you don't have to like flip it around and have a read more. Cause you're underwater and you're holding your breath. That is awful.


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[Assistant] I've spent a lot of time in Chicago. Many times! Yeah. Many times here as well. I'm frequent. I used to date a girl from Chicago.


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[Assistant] Another Comedy on Comments slash podcast. Hope you're all doing well. We have a great show planned for you today. Yeah, we do. That we're making up as we go. Yeah.


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[Assistant] You're sick. Wait, why are we focused on, cause Darius is actually not feeling good, why's Thicc ducking out? I gotta go pick up my daughter. Family stuff. No, really? How long you had that daughter? Too long! She can't pick herself up now? No, no.


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[Assistant] What? What? What's your other option up there? You know what I'm saying? Like on a wall.


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[Assistant] I want underground shelves. I want underground shelves, I want shelves in a closet. I hate dust is what I'm saying. If you have shelves in a room, you're getting dust.


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[Assistant] Or, it makes you look bad when you pick comments like that and you read them about yourself.


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[Assistant] They came to you? Yeah. You couldn't have gone to one of the other


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[Assistant] I'm not mad, Thicc, I'm just saying, follow me, over here, away from everything. You are doing some dumb shit.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I won't do it. I was really into this podcast until this whole sandwich thing started.


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[Assistant] Alright, wait, can I touch on this for a minute? I thought we did. Sometimes, when I use conditioner, do y'all condition?


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[Assistant] No, I'm bald! Okay, well, uh, when I use conditioner, for some reason the smell of conditioner to me reminds me of wicker. Why is that?


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[Assistant] I don't know if there's any comments about this, but was that the episode where you lure the animals to Simon? Was that last week's? No, I think that was last week's, the week before.


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[Assistant] A bear is a wonderful animal to have in that game. Yes, now they're fast, they're strong.


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[Assistant] Well, it looks like a bridge. And I don't know because there is a big section of the map called Broken Bridge, but that may be further north and that may actually be an aqueduct.


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[Assistant] Perfect. Yeah, we should. That's perfect. Okay, for those of you who didn't see the commercial by Absro, which was awesome. Yeah, thank you, thanks. We're holding a live event. Uh, what year is this? In case people- 2019. It's 2019. So if you're listening to this in the future,


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[Assistant] Don't try to do this because it'll be over. Yes. We're doing a live event here in our hometown of Wilmington. Uh, May 3rd and 4th. At Thalian Hall. There's also, uh, with the tickets, you get a entry into the pre-party and after party. It's going to be a weekend of fun. Party, live show, party. Also, How It Should Have Ended is going to be there and JT Music. Yep. I've never smelled anything like this.


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[Assistant] I'm saying, I'm saying you should have nasal fatigue, cause it's in there. Every breath should be you smell- you know how you go-


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[Assistant] Not smelly snot for them. Simon, can you put the PLGX link in the description so they can get tickets if they want to? Maybe. It's a live show.


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[Assistant] And as of right now, the tickets are about half sold out, so. So get them while you can. You okay, Simon?


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[Assistant] Yeah. You seem a little down today. Down?


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[Assistant] You think I'm down? Is there a lot on your mind? No. There is. What can I do to cheer you up? No, I'm fine. Everything's good. You want me to do a dance or sing a song for you?


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[Assistant] You say that, but if I bring up sandwiches or sharks right now, Simon takes his earrings off and starts bowing his chest up.


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[Assistant] I like it, I like it because, well here's what I like about, when you think about it, a group like ours, a channel like ours is rare, I think, just because of, it's hard to get five people together and now we have two extra with seven of us who don't kill each other.


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[Assistant] Do like a high energy version of it. That'd be interesting. I don't know. Let Thick do a guitar solo.


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[Assistant] It'll be like when those talk shows do their show from a different place.


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[Assistant] Okay, uh, can't say that. I can say excuse me though.


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[Assistant] And what an honor, Simon, huh? Yeah.


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[Assistant] Yeaah. The dumbest of people. Can use the web proof.


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[Assistant] They could hire you. It's like whenever the government hires, uh, criminals or hackers, like, okay, we're going to hire you and see if you can break into this. They hire you and you go, I can't figure this out. I'm like, it's not ready. It's not ready.


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[Assistant] And then if you don't click it, it clicks it for you eventually.


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[Assistant] Alright, uh, let me just say something. There's a lot of new inventions in the world. We're solving a lot of problems. Why is it that a cling wrap dispenser still can't cut the cling wrap? That really bugs the crap out of me.


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[Assistant] You pull it, and you use the lid, the lid has a little teeth on it, and you pull nothing. Tinfoil kinda works the same way, right? Tinfoil actually kinda works. Uh, cling wrap? No. You're just gonna stretch it until it breaks, and then the whole thing's gonna collapse, and then you just got a ball of plastic. Are you buying shit?


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[Assistant] Glad clean rap. So you're telling me, I feel like you're speculating here. Well, I'm just saying I- When's the last time you tried to clean rap something?


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[Assistant] Well do you do it on a weekly basis? I mean every other week or so I'll like, I'll like use half a lime or something, like I'll use the other half later. Cling wrap it. Which is always an issue.


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[Assistant] Always. Oh, every time. It's your technique. I would love to see you tear it.


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[Assistant] Get rid of that glad shit. Once you, once you do, speaking of pies, once you do, tear the cling wrap, it's not, it's not gonna grab the edges very well unless you wrap the whole thing like you're gonna ship it and then you can't get back in it. Oh please.


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[Assistant] But my point is, we're solving issues around the world. Some issues completely solved. But cling wrap, that's one. Batteries are getting better, remotes, bluetooth technology is great, there's all these things.


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[Assistant] You can get a cheap pair of, uh, speakers for your laptop at Best Buy that sound way better than that. Put it out there.


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[Assistant] You know what, and can we, can we FaceTime? I'm fine with that. Can we FaceTime the girl? Yeah, why not? Yeah.


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[Assistant] I'd like that. That way maybe you can read her lips at least if you can't hear her. That's true, that might help. Can I say this? You ever like think about breaking up with a restaurant because they quit carrying your soda? No. I do. I thought about it.


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[Assistant] Like two weeks in a row. I'm like how did you not refill the Dr. Pepper in a week? He was gonna burn the place to the ground. A whole week went by.


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[Assistant] Here's what I know about Simon. Life is a chore, he just wants to get it over with.


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[Assistant] It's a very- How long are we gonna be in the water? Like, this is a faster route. No, I like the water.


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[Assistant] It's an easy thing to solve, we just don't do it. It's not a hard problem like cling wrap. Right, no. This comment is from Ark, has nothing to do with Ark I don't think, but it's from DrMedic593. Simon, my mom said she wants hardwood in a bedroom. Please tell me that's wrong, you are the expert.


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[Assistant] Why hardwood would be bad in the bedroom? Do some floors need maintenance like hardwood? Do you have to like re-re-polish them or something?


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[Assistant] I would never have floors that I had to yearly like apply some sort of.


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[Assistant] My next comment is from a Conan video, from Jared Michael. Both people who aren't here, Thick and Dralis, had an argument about looting things too early, while enemies are still attacking and looting bodies.


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[Assistant] And Jared says, so if one were to die while a teammate is looting, would that be to get Dorad? And I think that's a great point.


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[Assistant] But I remember having this argument in seven days with, uh, Dralis, like, he's just going around checking the zombies while we're, there's like still a dozen zombies there, we're fighting them and he's looking for stuff.


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[Assistant] I forget which video this was from. This was from Alan Lindenberg. I just got my two tickets going all the way to PLGX from London going to there. Wow. He was talking about PLGX. I think it was on the PLGX commercial.


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[Assistant] So someone's buying a ticket from London. That's amazing. And maybe more people. I love it. Yeah, it's great.


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[Assistant] I can't wait because I mean this is, like when we go to RTX, usually there's just some people there that are like, oh I like these guys too. Like this is just, just the Niebz Gaming community and then how it should have been in JT Music community. It's gonna be great to have that many people in one place.


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[Assistant] Alright, this comment is from the GTA Epic Stunt Day, and there was some concerns about whether I actually hit Apsro's plane on the last stunt.


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[Assistant] I figured you guys were probably just tired and decided to just add that sound effect


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[Assistant] Yeah, if you're watching the video, you can see it if you're listening on the podcast. I'll explain it to you. Here we are, driving up to the ramp. Boom, it goes into that cinematic cam thing it does. Bam.


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[Assistant] Yeah, cause I'm not ready to quit it, cause I really like aberrations still, and we actually recorded one the other day. It was great. We'll keep posted on that. But also, like we're enjoying the forest now, and we're gonna do what we can.


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[Assistant] You don't come in here and yell at mom cause your sandwich ain't ready.


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[Assistant] Right, and you go out and do stuff. Don't you break character. Don't talk to me like you're... So what would you be? What would you be?


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[Assistant] Yep, you should be able to sit down anywhere there's a seat. I'll say that. Okay, so, sit in chairs. Uh huh. Alright, that's needs. I mean, that's enough. GTA 6. I don't think so. Now we're sitting down anywhere. Nope, I want more than that. You can only sit down in your house.


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[Assistant] So we got more, we won't spoil them right now. Right, yeaah, we shouldn't get into it. But that's a big one. Alright, I don't-


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[Assistant] So they're making progress. You know what else bothers me about technology? You may have talked about this before. Motion sensor sinks.


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[Assistant] I mean this is basic stuff, right? I mean a sensor, it even works in scrap mechanic. Yea. Like when you put your hands under the sink, I mean this should just come on.


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[Assistant] Everyone's leaving there with soap all over their hands.


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[Assistant] Yeah, and that's a big thing for like a store like Walmart that has like thousands of stores. Yeah. If you got like a hundred that are broke and they're just running. That adds up. Or people that leave them running. Mhm. That could be millions of dollars. Yeah.


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[Assistant] What do you wanna do in the forest tonight, Simon?


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[Assistant] Like do you have a goal? No, my goal is to stay alive. You don't remember the last recording, do you?


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[Assistant] Like we do it a lot. We couldn't. We couldn't if we tried. She really is pretty awesome. Yea.


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[Assistant] Yeaah. Ladies and gentlemen, another podcast.


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[Assistant] We had that design and, um, Jincraff made the cooter design. We've had that for a while in the office.


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[Assistant] No. Why? It's a hard word to say. At what age? So many syllables. I'm kinda joking. But uh, listen. Apparently, Tortsitence is possibly a, um, a Dr. Seuss reference. The Horton. The Horton. Here's a- So maybe instead of trying to say elephant, she was trying to say Horton?


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[Assistant] Really upset. Well listen, sometimes you just have a bad thumbnail day. Of course you do. But hey, while we're on the pooping on thick parade. Every week for me. He sent me a rough cut of the, uh, See Ya Thieves video.


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[Assistant] He's like, look this over, see if it looks tight enough. I am six seconds in, I found a problem. Yeah, something got moved.


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[Assistant] I thought it was fine, I had to like do it twice, but something got moved. And the one that I'm looking at, all the pirates are dancing, dead quiet, no music.


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[Assistant] But at the end of the day, it makes a better product because, I mean, just for example, the first Human Fall Flat that I cut, where we're going through that like desert-y area, I watched it with a bunch of people, and they're thinking the one part drags, and I'm like,


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[Assistant] Man, these guys don't like my videos. What's a bunch of people? Who is the screen audience you have? Uh, Abshra isn't here, Anthony I think, Adahop as well. When they're all like, that particular part could be cut in half.


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[Assistant] Oh, you know what? I think you- yeaah, I remember now. And then we all said, nah. Yeaah. You don't know anything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We spent a long time there. Yeah. And I thought when we were doing it, I'm like, well, he can just cut this bit out if it doesn't go anywhere.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was never gonna be captain, so. No, you shouldn't be. Be asking questions every, like, ugh. Captain should ask questions.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think you should make as many friends as you can. Focus on the good people around you. Hey, the more friends you have, the more backup you got. And then you can ask them to help you move when you move later. That's right. Even if you're not in town. It's all about that. Oh, fuck me. How did this come back to this?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because he drove us somewhere and we're like, who's chasing you, Anthony? He was taking every turn on two wheels. And we were just going to lunch. There's no need to use the e-brake on turns. Don't do that. Are you done?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It looks like a very warm shirt. It's like 70 degrees today. 74 today.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh wow, uhm, this is fun. Let's take some time here. Let's fast forward to an hour from now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Would you like to just see people walking around with just nice things on their shirts? Or, I'm only a stranger.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You ever see someone and you're like, oh, I like that shirt. Just say, hey, I like your shirt. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But hey, on a serious note, this is where world peace starts. It does. It's by all of us taking little actions. At the bank the other day, I saw this lady coming, I was holding the door, like there was a double door and I was holding


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's spoiler in his prime. Ah, so the doctor's the victim here. I believe so, yes. Gotcha. I like spoiler. I do too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay. Oh, now it's good. Thanks. Thanks for spoiling it for us too. I think I know the secret identity.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm gonna bring it up to the boys. I thought you would have already had a comment prepared. I did? No, we're doing that live.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. You know, you can't use this wingydangdang song in here. Yeah. You guys made it. How dare you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Duralius was playing on a computer back there, which someone else probably had Barbie Dreamhouse on their Steam account when they logged in and it shows up. DataHop had nothing to do with it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That was 10,000th on that video. On that video, that's the only video to hit that. Remember when we started Duralis and Associates on Escapist? And there was no view count on Escapist. The only way we could tell if a video did good is if it got a lot of comments. And if we hit 200 comments, that was a good video.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In the castle one where y'all got to jump and grab that lamp and swing over, I was so mad I didn't get to do that. Cause I fell in the water and it just threw me over where you go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Listen, he, he's great. He works his butt off. But uh, listen, we all do the same thing he does. What? Which part? Masturbate? We all do. I try not to work. The editing process that he showed, that's... His video? Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Each video has, uh, different challenges, like, uh, like, like, seven days is hard because he always has like five, six angles every time. GTA is hard because Rockstar... Editor. Do you want to go to the Rockstar editor? That's the one I just finished. I finished Rockstar. And I probably spent four days getting Rockstar footage. Wow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. But we did learn that we could bring the footage to different computers. You can export those Rockstar clips, which is gonna make things way easier in the future. Right. Before we go any further, let's talk to our sponsor. That's a good voice. Yes. Or talk about him. Yeah, let's talk directly to them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean it, I mean it sucks cause you're, you kinda hope that Cooter would have went down in like a big battle where we were all fighting together. Right. Like Big Shirley. Yeah, but the good thing about this story is it all just happens as it happens. Right. And I'm done.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know when I fly with you, you're like, I have to have an aisle seat. Yea, all that stuff. Like you don't want to be trapped. I don't like it. Yea, I get-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That doesn't mean- Yeah, like I don't like to look at things and just say that's weird, I don't understand it, it's mystic weirdness. Yes. I always like to know what I don't know. Yeah. It's not something I'm looking at anytime soon, but I wouldn't just write it off as crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kneeves with the comments, break it down. Alright folks, hello everyone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that was before Alpha 16, I believe. So a lot of people have played this game in the past. And from what I understand now, the Alpha 16 update...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't want you to read my comments. Classified. Belated birthday. Whatever. I don't like getting my presents before Christmas.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't like seeing the Super Bowl ads before the Super Bowl game. You don't like seeing the Super Bowl. I don't like hearing the comments before it's commenting day. Okay. Okay, I get it. What's up with the ads before Super Bowl these days?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Did they do it this year? They just gave teasers this year, didn't they? But last year they were just out everywhere. Yeaah. That's not fun. That's the only reason people watch that game. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Great game. Batten, let's talk about that. Wardrobe failures. You wanna hear what the monarch has to say? Yep. Thick, you should make your own place, called the Thick Forty Fortress. Oh, okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Bravo! Done and done! And I think I saw some more people with that idea, but uh, I saw the monarchs first. Great name. I like, wow. Kill all the birds you want in there. I will. Spencer Drake!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's saving up, and I wish I had more skill points. I did spend a bunch the other day on some like, pummeling skills and some, some other stuff. I like to spend skill points on the stuff that doesn't upgrade automatically by use. Right. Cause you only get so many I think. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's annoying. Right. Sure. Next comment is from Lunashade. So does this mean Thiccon 2018 is cancelled? That was, uh, after the Cooter thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Gentry Fanny sent this comment. It was from the, uh, Humanfall Flat video, the Aztec one. Hey, Neeps Gaming Crew, I have a question. Do y'all ever get so mad at each other that y'all fist fight?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Brothers fist fight a lot, and seeing that y'all are brothers to one another, I was just wondering that question. Please answer. Ah, we're also grown men.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Are we okay with that? I'm not. Well, he does a lot of weird stuff. I kind of embrace his goofiness.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, he was like Superman. He went into a foam booth. Half a second later, he's wearing fishnets and high heels. And he's Barbie Girl. And he knew the world.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Should we? No, no, we need to wipe that clean. I have more comments. Oh, please, thank god. This is from Moises Mallet Official. It's fun hearing Thicke, Duralis, and Abstro talking to each other because they all have the same voice. LOL. That's true, we do. Go ahead and talk right now. I keep saying this. Who am I? Who am I right now? I don't know, Duralis, who are you?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is that Apsro? Wait, Apsro's not here. No, that's Apsro. He's not here. Who is that? See, I brought this up the other day. I was like, look, some people have a hard time telling who each other is, and you're all like, you're crazy, Neebs. Everybody knows who who. And you found one. You found one. This is one recent. I've seen lots of these.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] See, I wanted to make a video, like a study video, like listen. We're gonna have Duralis just talk for the next three minutes and we're gonna show you all the characters he plays and let you get to know Duralis' voice better.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How would you do it? How would you go about that? Uh, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Who's Who Nibs Gaming video. This is Nibs. You may not recognize my voice, but if you listen to it for a while, you might start to understand it. Complain a little bit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's Duralius? Hey, this is me. No, he's doing it, this is his job. Alright, now listen closely, this is gonna be Thick 44 talking. Hello, my name is Duralius.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Started, uh, Designate a Survivor. You started it. Yep. Yep.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I don't love it. Here's their thing. They start off strong and then the writers start thinking they gotta put as much drama in as they can. Oh yea. I like problem solution. That's what I wanna see.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, you know what? I want to try this today. Let's try it. Uh oh. You ready? Nope. It's a new thing, cause we got a lot of great people out there in our community. And I just wanted to shout out to a few of them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I really do. And we'll keep you posted on, on Duralius. Yeaah. And his, uh. Yeaah. Balanced, uh, happiness. I just feel better, yeaah. Oh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Also the title is Far Cry 5 The Story Begins. This could be a gameplay video from just looking at the thumbnail and title.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You want me to read this one, correct? Oh, it's colorful, you should read this. It's got some colorful language, uh, so that's why Niamh gave it to me. Alright, this is from Von Thorn that says,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And like putting in the work, and even though the playthroughs haven't done it for me in the past, so I click on the vid and all of a sudden I'm like, wait, what's this? Docu-series? Oh, fuck! This is some new shit! This is-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Really good. And you know, it works so damn well. Far Cry is absolutely perfect for this format. The look of the game fits the documentary style with ease and the dynamic with some old Hank and Jed type shit. Like some aliens coming into your living room and being snobbish dicks type shit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like some every hero has a villain type shit. Finally, my boy Doraleous found a way to get his favorite game some more playtime. Good on you, brother. Ha ha. I love it. We'll be watching all of these Far Cry vids from now on to think I doubted you, Doraleon.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think I know exactly what happened. You do? I think I do. Okay. Uh, I think when you flew by, you did get nicked. Yeah. Because of the footage. I saw the nick. Your dragon was very bloody.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now, I saw this too when I got hit, a little status effect in the bottom right hand corner of my screen. And so what gigas do is they have this effect called gnashed. It's like this little red teeth looking effect.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What Nash does is the target loses one percent of their maximum health per second for five seconds. So I think what happened is he bit the dragon and the health went almost all the way down. And with that Nash effect, it just took a couple seconds after flying past until the dragon was in the air and then bam, dragon was dead.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, did you have your hood off? Was there an ash effect? I dunno.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hit right there. And then flies a little bit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yea, Neebs, uh, roll back real quick to the, to right before that shot. So like, this is, I think this is where I get bit. Bottom right hand corner, see? Yep.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So it's this little thing that drains your health. So that's the only thing that I think could have happened.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I thought, man, when, uh, yeah, when I blew that up. Well, you blew up the chopper, and, uh, in the second one, which was just funny, so we had to get out on jet skis, and that just worked out for the show, because when you guys hopped on jet skis, Duralye's got left behind, and I thought for sure, it's like, god, we're gonna have to do this mission all over again, he's gonna get killed, but the fact that you got out of there,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right. They're gonna have your mug shot on the wall there. This asshole comes in. Nothing wrong with that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The nice thing about GTA is you can watch those on the big screen and they look, they look fun. Yeaah. Because of the big action. I can see you being in a Best Buy and stopping going, hmm, that's Grand Theft Auto. What's all this? What's going on here?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It is. Blocky, also learning the combos. I mean, that's all the God of War games have had very intricate, intricate combo systems. You know, like heavy, heavy, light, light, or light, light, heavy, light. You know, learning those combos, like what these attacks do will make you a better player.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I think so. There's no hills and valleys. No, there's no hill- yeah, it's- it's one note throughout the entire thing. It is. It's just, brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yeah, uhm, the trailer to me was just, yeah, it's too much. It, it, yeah. It looks gorgeous and I'm excited to see more of the game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yea, it's like, that doesn't, like, the Battlefield 1 trailer pumped me up. I was like, holy shit, that looks cool.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yea, cause they're dressed up like steampunk. Yea, it's like, it doesn't, nothing in that trailer said World War II to me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I'm sure they're gonna do some stuff at what EA plays coming up. I'm sure we're gonna see a whole lot more about the game. And I'm excited to see more of the gameplay. I mean, it sounds like they're really going for character customization is gonna be a big thing in this one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well, I mean, that's kind of the other thing. That's what I think they did, and that's why maybe it looks so weird.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well, I mean, that's a thing, I mean, a game, it's subjective to people, cause I really like that game mode that sometimes would take an hour to play, uhm, it wasn't operations. Operations? Oh!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, Operations was where you went from one to the other. The one that they released after the game was released, where it was like the back and forth. Was it Frontlines?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nah, luring, uh, that one may be too big. The one you're thinking of. Yeah, maybe.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We both had our phones out, like, who's gonna read their comments, and we made contact, and I pointed at him, like, it's you, man. It's all you, kid. Yeah. Nice. You're welcome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah, we take time to edit videos before we put them out. It's crazy. Sorry.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You don't end up like Jamie Kennedy. I'm just trying too hard.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, just have a, uh, I like the idea of making up your own war. Like, that's always fun. Yeah. Because that's what that trailer looked like. It looked like they made up their own war. But I think it's war. Fighting over a fried chicken recipe.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, no. Be going. Uhm, I forgot to get the name from this, but this was a Twitter message that I got.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But it was all worth it. Thank you all for being so inspiring to my life. You guys really do change our lives without even knowing most of us. Keep doing what you do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That simonssandwiches is simons's personal twitter account. We all have twitter. You have at thicc44. Thicc44official. Thicc44official. I'm at JohnnyEthko. And even Duralius, who doesn't get on there, has a twitter. Yea, I made one tweet. I think it's at Duralius. And then Neebs doesn't tweet. We kind of do the Neebs official. That's the twitter account for Neebs gaming.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, my next comment is from, uh, Rob Levitt. That said, uh, this was off the, uh, latest ARC animation we did. That said, these are actually amazing. Great video guys. Any more animation on the horizon? And yes, I've already commissioned another one. So yea, another animation coming down the pipe.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And yeaah, I love it when we have animations on the channel. Oh yeaah. That's where our roots come from and I just like seeing good animation. But I'm biased just because I love it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] On the animation. Yes. Nice. Who was done by? That was done by Ryan McLaughlin. McLaughlin.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and he's already animating like that. I mean, yeah, that kid's gonna be awesome if he keeps at it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean I wouldn't mind doing one, but it's a time thing. Yeah, it's like-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I did that one a long time ago. Is it? It'd be different, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, they're fun to do, but yeah, they'll burn you out. Like, we did what? How many episodes did we do? Fifty? Fifty. Yeah, fifty in all. What was that? Was that thirteen episode run? And even that was just...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but it'll be fun. Yeah, of course. Stay hydrated. Yeah. Alright, I got a, I got one from, uh, DogsLemo. This was off the Sea of Thieves one we did that said, Did Cream know you were YouTubers?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But the part where you guys put the whistling, clapping music, it just makes me think of those stupid ass kid videos that my sibling always watch. And I'm sure I'm not the only one, right? And no, you're not. Phenomenal? There was one more guy. There was one, yeah. I saw a couple comments, uh, Duralius, that music that starts playing when you come in on the jet ski, that really whistly, snappy music.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But then I, I, there were other comments that were the complete opposite of like, oh my god, that music when Duralias turns the corner was so amazing! So, it depends on if you've never heard it or not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yeaah, I can absolutely see why it irks some people if there are kids, those cringy kids channels out there that use that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it also happens further along, the days go in the game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This was a similar comment, like, flying shazbot says, sigh. This looks just like Far Cry 4, which is just like Far Cry 3.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I can see that. Like if you were to drive to Montana right now, or if you happen to live there and you just walk outside for five minutes, you probably aren't going to have a bear attack.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's the thing. We've done that a couple times. There was just enough time in between for me to completely not remember that happened.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It began with a noticeable change in the viscosity of my saliva.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Within minutes of consumption my mouth had filled with a thick, foamy slime. Though I was in a cool...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Animal noises broadcasting from my pelvis were an ominous warning of the violent acts that were to follow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It started sweet, almost tangy. That was quickly overpowered by a claw.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm good now. I'm gonna get through the rest of it easy. I know. This is giving you content, Simon.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] After another moment the noises in my core hit a fever pitch and I was struck rigid with


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wiping was a no-go. Toilet paper simply became vile paper mache.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, we should talk about that. Okay. But we should also talk about our sponsors real quick. Nail it. FXX. Animated comedy. Archer. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So Archer Danger Island premiering Wednesday, April 25th at 10 PM on FXX Season 9 centers on the semi-functioning alcoholic


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Quicksand, cannibals, super intelligent monkeys, poison darts, and pirates among other things. So watch the all new season of Archer Danger Island Wednesdays at 10 starting April 25th.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Dude, what is this? Is this saying what season they're in? That's what it said, Season 9.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What are we doing first? Remember that? It was your idea. Well, you run this show. Tell us! Well, I would like to know when you're coming back, Thicc. In arc. When are you coming back? Because I am- Tell us, Thicc. I'm kinda done with you living somewhere else. I want you to annoy me. Again. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My comments are on commenting on comments, the last one. And Cryptic Panther says, so my wife and I watch your videos together, and during this commenting on comments video, she said she has a small crush on Simon. She doesn't know I made this comment, so Simon,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Say hi to Michelle. Nobody will see it. Wow. How cryptic.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh a lot. Alright, so Joe Buckley says, uh, my wife is in labor with our first son and here I am watching Niebz Gaming. If you think she's mad now, just wait till she finds out I named the kid Simon Doraleus Niebz Buckley.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That would be amazing. And then, and then he replied to himself and says, for maybe a month.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, reclusive on three says, dude, thick.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You got roofied, bruh. Like, for real though. Yeah? And, and yeah. And it makes sense. It is absolutely possible. Actually, I...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I didn't really think that last time, but it makes perfect sense. Cause you don't do that. You don't go and get yourself so frickin' hammered that you're, that's not you. Yea, but who handled your drink? Just the bartender? But people do that. Sometimes people in bars, some people are just messed up. They'll just be like, have fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Lesson learned. Alright, uh, the Clifton says, yep, says, How come you guys stopped doing the GTA mod videos? They were by far the most successful videos on the channel and depending on a bitch.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, and depending on how well a series does on the channel seems to be the reason if it stays or goes, one of those videos reached 20 million views. GTA mods are fun as hell. I just wish we could all experience them together.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and the thing is we can get more creative with some of this stuff and think about more of a story around it if we could. That's the thing, if we could all play together it would be a completely different deal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know if somebody's ever asked this question before, but Tuna Sammich says if you guys had to choose Arc or Seven Days, what would it be? Seven Days for me. Arc for me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Those are scary looking birds. I don't like them. Crows are smart.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's one of those things. Now, I'm a super simple guy that could probably do the same crash for, I could cut together something that I would really enjoy and most people wouldn't out of that and have no structure, just kinda.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, so before we go any further, let's talk to our other sponsor, which is Wolverine the Long Knight. And this is Marvel, and they are doing their first scripted podcast ever, and it's available exclusively on Stitcher Premium. Script, is it like a radio show? Yea, well I mean that's when it's a scripted story. Like when you used to sit around the radio?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So you'll be getting into the heart of a murder investigation.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Listen to this, where do I go? You go to wolverinepodcast.com


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And use the code MARVEL for a free month of Stitcher Premium. So check that out, it sounds awesome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it'd be, uh, we talked about this before, but me personally, I think it'd be good for like three or four minutes. Yeah, but the thing is, man, we made a video out of that one cooking thing. You probably could get ten minutes out of it, if, you know, maybe if a couple of us played.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There should be, listen, if there was a VR game called Tickle Fight


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sure that it's available on Spotify and Google Play. I will make that a priority. Who is this guy?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, this is a great reminder for me to do it too. So, I'm glad you said this. I want everyone who gives a shit, who wants to be able to listen to this, by this time we should be able to have it on Spotify and what was the other? Google Play. I personally use Google Play, like I have a subscription to it. Is he setting a deadline right now?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm a go getter. You want a guy who's going to get things done? He's going to make deadlines and he's going to commit. I'm going to commit to it. And it has to happen now because it's going to be in the podcast. I got to do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Take the baguette challenge. But what's the weight? We gotta have a weight. A weight? Cause there's all different bowls. You can't, you say bowl, it's like a cereal bowl. Six ounces. Six ounces of banistering.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, this person who made this comment might be completely wrong in just assuming that I did-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well I gave it to you that's fine, but he's the one who contracted it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know, it's crazy that I didn't die. I couldn't believe it. I thought maybe for some reason I had hit the wrong button or something. The game was acting crazy because you should have been dead there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just was just shooting and then you guys walked over. I wasn't hitting anything. He checked it. And then after that, it was still a bunch of fighting and I should have been dead way after that, after he checked if it was on or not. It definitely was not God mode.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The sleepy time. I just want to go fishing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We should go fishing. So I would like to be the person that has to fish.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well guess what? I'm okay with it. It'll be a B story. Okay. I'll deal with it. You get spoiled with Far Cry 5. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was quite, for a rainbow trout, it was huge. Is your candidate telling you fish stories? Well, here's something, what's the biggest fishy, I mean, I like fishing, but I don't really do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was in Costa Rica though. Ooh. Kinda makes it nice. I wanna go to Costa Rica. Yeaah. I like the desert. Do a little ayahuasca. And this guy, I swear to God, I was out there, I was on a small boat with, uh, with three other guys, and this other boat came up


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well no, I mean. No, do it. If I'm, maybe I'm remembering the wrong fish, but I want to say this was a very long time ago, black sea bass. Wasn't a grouper.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, there's a picture right here. It's a 200 pound black sea bass in the ocean. But this thing was, the mouth was massive and the guy, apparently they're super docile. Like once you catch them, the hardest thing was getting it in the boat. And I don't know how the hell they did it because that boat wasn't big. But anyway.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well, I mean if you're gonna eat it, I'm all about as long as I try it, but I've never


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And what's the serving? I don't know. Well that's the info I'm now asking for. One cup. One cup.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wait a second, 16 grams of protein, you're telling me I eat a cup of corn and I'm getting what people are selling for 5 bucks in a protein bar?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The geese. Everybody, Duralis is beating something into the ground. Let him finish. Okay. Perfect.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're not questioning his loyalty to his business


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I, well yeaah, cause I was like, I've seen a map, barely recently, and uh, I feel like it's more west. It is more west. It's more west, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just heard something on the radio yesterday that like 44% of Americans have sought revenge on a co-worker at some point in time. That's a big number. Yeah, 44%!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Seems large. That's like a big number, yeaah. Yeaah, they probably did like a, a poll of ten people working at Walmart. Sought revenge, I guess.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Someone shared a picture on Twitter of pretty big banana with tons of banana strings on it grossed me out. I blocked him. I forgot we even talked about that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My dirt-neck little daughter, she, uh, she says barf. That looks like barf daddy. We'll be in a restaurant. Yeah, that's pretty common. Yeah. Yeah, but it's a kid thing. She announces it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That clam chowder looks like barf daddy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's a, there's a website on all the weapons, uh, like the Seven Days Wiki, that, yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Guys, I have an update on the nail gun damage. So the base damage is 5, max damage is 10. To wear as a pistol, base damage is 13, max damage is 19. But, sawed off shotgun, base damage is 9 to 6, max damage 9 to 10. So...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, that makes no sense. But the DPS on uh, uh, Sawed Off Shotgun is...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Damage per second? Uh huh. 800. Or, I'm sorry, 80 as opposed to the nail gun being 26.32.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's size from both of us, Duralius. Yeah? From everyone?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't want more huts and things. It's gonna turn our lighthouse into a church.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Me bad? Uh, you got Sol commented in the Ark video and said, please, please, please do not tame a frog in Ark.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My girl has a really bad phobia of frogs and last time you tamed one in scorched earth she couldn't watch anymore. We both watch every video you make and have all your t-shirts so it would be terrible if she couldn't watch any longer. I hope you understand.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, Tanez Calrade in the same video says, I'd love to be on coming and commenting on comments.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sorry. We're gonna host that on a different site. Uh, also says, by the way, you can use a tamed deedon, or uh, that's the pig, to heal a baby wyvern as it grows up. And then you don't need milk. What? Good to know now. You're still not gonna get the


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it's time to mention the folks who provide us with the server. Survival servers! Because they've been doing it for a while now. And that's who we get our servers from.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We had, we had that happen with the server that we, we had. Like just about everything was tamed and the server ran really really slow because of it. That's another problem that you'll run into.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, you know. I'm gonna, I'm gonna see movies and talk about them in front of you because you'll never watch them. Oh, I watched it. Yeah, like years later, seems like. Was this years? Yeah, kinda. But you watched it in the background. In internet time it was.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, it was funny because, like, I was waiting to talk about it and he never went to see it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you let us know when you're gonna see, uh, the new Avengers movie, we'll hold off on talking about it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Mo's, the franchise, uh, Mexican food, uh, yeaah, they have a place on their thing where you can tip and it's like, they just made the food like any other place, they don't like come wait on you or bring you-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Normally I don't tip there unless they look really slammed and they're being super friendly to me when I'm like, but yeah, I think it's weird when you go to a restaurant where they don't wait on you and they've got a tip jar.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The danger in that is that when you're splitting tips with people, you might be splitting them with people that aren't working as hard as you. You're right. I don't like when somebody gets more money than me and they're fucking lazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What, what's your, uh, everybody check your Uber rating?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're worried about things that aren't gonna affect you in the future. Because you try to tell them how to do their fucking job.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There is no website right now that currently has every type of food or sandwich, in your case, spinning on a green screen. You just have a whole website.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You get the club free. You gotta sign up to your website. Mmhm, that's what the porn sites do. To get the Rubens and the uh, uh huh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Taylor Dane's up next. Hey, Neves gang, what's next after Subnautica? The story is getting close to ending, right? Any new games? You're going through it again, right? You're going to play it again.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Next comment is from Sir Digby. That really will be a highlight of my life, man. Thanks. I was Sir Digby, that guy with the green hair and uh, greener deluxo.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All you guys are great, but I'm so happy I got to ride with Abstro. Good luck on your Act 3 finale, uh, kisses. Was that really you? Do you remember?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, one last comment. This one is from Neves Gaming. Uhm, can you flush a toothpick?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, Tuesday, I have lunch with that throw, and he's like, oh, I got chicken in my teeth. And so he gets a toothpick, then we get to the office, and I see a toothpick floating in the toilet, and I'm like, what kind of nuts trying to flush a toothpick?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, toothpicks are not fine. Two tips would be better if they're not plastic. Back me up here. You know how the inner workings of a toilet work?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is our new thing. You know what we're gonna do? Are you done? We spent more time on the Gordon Ramsey thing. This is a serious issue.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The one end? Yeah, I see it now. And it's kind of fancy looking. Oh no, it's not. It's not? I like the-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Riveting conversation. Oh, they're so good. It's a different feel. From learned doctors. And the cool thing about the stream is there's all these other people, like Bob Bob, who made a friend through Neve's Gaming. Yeaah. There's a thousand some people there to chat with.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So is it, is it a video with a bunch of movie clips or just one single clip from Toonstone? Yeah, how's that work?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nobody. Doesn't work there. What are we talking about? You always get stuck in the end of the show. You get stuck in that corner. A lot of people think the end of the show is the best place to be. Okay. Right, you're the headliner. Most movies are that way. You're the headliner.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which wouldn't show up if you're already subscribed, right? If you're on that channel.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But listen, if you haven't heard from us in like three or four days, you're not getting a notification. We don't usually go more than that without a video.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know if this counts, but I've spent almost like two years camping.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but I, it was, no. No, I mean like you'd get- It was like seven months out of, out of the year. You wouldn't have power for seven months? Well, just, you're in the woods all the time.