[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Going back to the round world thing though. Empyrean, they got round worlds. Isn't that great?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. You head east. Eventually you're gonna come back around. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's amazing. I feel like they've had that. They have. I just think it's cool. You shouldn't overlook that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh really? Yea. Alright. I like to remember good things. Remember when Simon did that thing? He made the dirt? That's right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, I always wanted to make that the very beginning. Hello everyone. Hello, alright, we're off and running. You might not know where that bop just came from, who that bop is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But the bop comes from, I just found out Liverpool, that happens to have a population of over 900,000.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know that, but it usually takes that to be a country. You have to have a lot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hello. Yes, round of applause. A wonderful, wonderful mod that we've enjoyed thoroughly and uh, Cain, I'm super excited that you're here. You poor bastards.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What inspired you? Like, obviously you were a fan of the game Seven Days to Die. What made you go, hm, I wanna change everything?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So you had no idea what you were doing and it took you a day. Like, I don't understand how you know that you can get into just doing something like this. Is this something that anybody can do and they can just learn on the internet how to do it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, none of us know anything about coding. Explain, what is XML?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, that was the first Christmas. That's not the same Christmas where you changed everything. Was that a year later? Two years later? Oh, Jesus Christ.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You played the game, uh, enough to know you wanted to change it that much. Wow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So like, have you, have you had any contact with the Fun Pimps?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm, I'm so, I'm fascinated in like, I respect the mod world so much because I enjoy modding games, like I modded Skyrim to all hell. So it's interesting to talk to somebody that actively does it because I tried coding once and my eyes just went crossed and I ended up in a fetal position. So mad respect, dude.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So you get to stay at home, work, take care of your wife. I know that I'm sure there's, you know, obviously issues with that, but in the meantime, like you could work together and then you both enjoy this game and it does sound like the best out of this situation.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What even got you into coding? Uhm, or do you do any coding with this? Or is it just changing XML files?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Until further told by Kane, message me on Twitter.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's kind of my goal. I'm, I'm saving up my points for my class so I can build us gyrocopters, because once we get gyrocopters, we can scour any cities for cracking books.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thank you to our sponsor NordVPN. And if you don't already use them, you're missing out on the best VPN out there securing your personal data and your internet activity. It's simple to use. I connect with just one click, or you can enable auto connect for zero click protection.


[User] Please transcribe this text

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[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Threat protection blocks intrusive ads and web trackers. And when you download a file, threat protection inspects it for malware. It also automatically scans URLs and blocks malicious ones.


[User] Please transcribe this text

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[User] Please transcribe this text

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[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Click on a location and you'll be connected in seconds. It's that easy. And NordVPN has a fantastic deal to share with our community. Go to nordvpn.com slash needs to get a two year plan with a huge discount and it's risk free with Nord's 30 day money back guarantee. So come on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Go to NordVPN.com slash needs to get a two year plan with a huge discount. Thank you, NordVPN.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, what would be your, if you had to, which obviously you don't, you had to stop tomorrow, it's like, oh, seven days, no more, what would be the next game you would mod, or do you have a game that you were like, hmm, maybe.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nice. So, so now that you had such a quick answer, can you see yourself, uh, double-dipping or is that, you know,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Something that you'd go, well, if I'm going to go and mod that, that means I'm going to have to take a break from darkness falls, get it at a place where I'm not updating it anymore, at least for the next six months, because you're going to work on something else.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what's nice, you know, it's like you're the ultimate dick. You should be like, oh yeah. Like, you know, yeah, you made these three mistakes. And the only way I'm going to play this trash game is if I fix them myself.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I love it, just having that ability is wonderful. Kane, do you ever, do you have any ambition in the future to create your own game?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And three, two, one, bop. We're gonna hold you to this legally. If you make the game, we have to. It's a contract though. It's a really bad contract. We are the only voice actors you hire.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well, and there it is, and it's in the description. Yeah, look at that. Show this man some love, because he's made some, uh, wonderful, wonderful mo-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He's showing us all the love. It's, it's so interesting cause now, like we, cause we've been playing this game for years, obviously.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's like, for people who pay attention, not for me. I won't ever fuckin' do it. But, they're like, babes? There's always that music cue, isn't it? Like, when Nightfall happens, there's that dong, dong, dong. Yea, that's the music cue.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, so. You heard it here. That's perfect. They kick in and that's when you know on horde night, you're like, damn, it's seven o'clock, alright guys, we know for sure. The cicadas are yelling.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like that though, like, you can tell time kind of by your environment. It's like, oh, this thing, yeah, that's really good. Has there, uhm...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm sure there's a challenge whenever the Fun Pimps, uh, updates the game. Do you have to reconfigure your mod to work with all the new updates?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So how long does something like, let's just say there's a, you know, an update just happened. Does it take you a weekend to get it up and running?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So do you avoid sleep sometimes because of this? Cause it sounds like if you've already got a full time gig, obviously. You know, it's just like, cause are your days sometimes 16 hours or are you just, are you a wuss and you're like 8 hours?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Thank you to our sponsor, Me Undies. And everyone knows Me Undies for their super soft undies and comfy bralettes. Personally, my Me Undies boxer briefs are the most comfortable I've ever worn. And their lounge pants are perfect for the couch or bed, in my opinion.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I love em. But did you know that they make other stuff too?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're talking durable, cushy socks that will make your feet sing. We're talking super stretchy loungewear. We're talking daily tees, shorts, and rompers that'll add a little silky softness to your everyday. They even make hoodies for your dog so you can match every important person in your life.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Make MeUndies your destination for all things soft and sustainable. And MeUndies has a great offer for our community. For any first time purchasers, you get 20% off plus free shipping and returns. So to get 20% off your first order free shipping and a 100% satisfaction guarantee,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Go to meundies.com slash Neebs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's meundies.com slash Neebs. Thank you, meundies.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So do you have anything that you're working on that's almost, uh, I don't know, like a sneak peek, but it's, you know, coming out so soon that you could tell us and give us a scoop. Does that make sense?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which class has been, or can we know which class is gonna be gone? Scavenger. Scavenger's gone, okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, cause scavengers are like the loop goblin in class.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, we haven't even seen it. Well, we may have seen it this week. That might have been what, uh, what Nick and Simon saw this week. Yeah, cause I was gonna say, like, there's something that we ran across, and it looked like it was, uh, it had, like, Hulk arms.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So you'd be making like a block, let's just say, if I wanted to replace, you know, a small picture in there with just a, a neib's face.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Done. So we're gonna try to get unity. Yea, I guess we're good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Has there been any like, uh, challenge? Or what is your biggest challenge where you've thought...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wanna make this change to the game. That should be easy, and it took you way longer than you thought.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, really? Neat. Okay. Gotcha. So we can dial that back. I like, I like the madness. It's, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] As soon as you even hear a grunt from a screen where it's like, fuck, where is it, kill it. It's awesome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Beautiful, fantastic. Well, we'll talk, we'll do-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's why the modding community has always been interesting to me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because yea, you have modders out there making a living doing this stuff, but it's kind of rare.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, like he's talking about when something breaks and everyone's yelling at you. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're like, guys, this is like a part-time thing I do. Like, that's just gotta be, uh, yeaah, it's just an interesting thing to do for people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, and that's what I should have, I should have asked him, if we wanted to put a kitten in there, you know, like just a stupid looking, you know, bad moving kitten, how hard would that be?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It did scare me, and I've played with Unity, so I understand the concept. But uhm, so for a kitten, we would have to go on like a, you know, a Unity store. Find a little 3D kitten. Exactly. Put it in there, assign a sound to it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that would take work. The kitten is attracted to the laser. Yeah. The lasers even act as an entity in those games.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I could be wrong, but I wanna say I've seen that Seven Days mod where they add a companion dog. Oh really? Yea, I think someone's done that. I could be wrong.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but that's what's cool about being a modder is like having that ability. Figuring that out. This would be really cool in the game. Oh, you know what? I'm gonna go fucking do it. Like, that's cool.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And speaking of seven days, I don't think I've seen the last couple, but you were saying here in the office, Dora, that Thicke is catching up to you on those debts.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's just like, I play careful because yeaah, in that game I'm like, anything in here could kill me. It's like, let's rush into this building. I'm like, mm-mm, hell no, I'm gonna play this super careful.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think, I saw a comment on one of the videos about that. It's a certain setting in your graphics. If you turn it off, I think it's uhm...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think my, yeah, my only death is just from that first night, isn't it? First night trying to live in the city.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's gonna happen one day, but I'm happy to have gone this long because now it's like an occasion. Yeah. Oh, sure. Yeah, it's gonna hit you hard. Yeah, exactly. It's like it's gonna hurt more when I die. I'm actually feeling


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh god, it's right. Um, the last, I think the last two times I died, it wasn't my fault at all. And when that happens, I usually think it's really funny.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But when you blow me up, I'm like, okay, that was just funny.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And this is where I did acknowledge, because immediately when you said what happened happened, I went...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I remember, I was a little shit one Christmas. We went to grandma's house Christmas Eve.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, God, he's been playing so long. He knows that game. In and out. In and out in a way that most people never will. So when did we start? 15?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So how, uh, so I guess what did this game start, 2013? We're not doing math. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That never ends. Hey, we should have asked him his opinion on that just cause, just to hear it. It's a perfect game you don't want.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So that's the thing, like on consoles, they haven't even updated console in a hot minute. Right. So I mean, this game is really only flourishing on the PC market.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, you could do it with a controller. You gotta learn it like anything else. But yea, sounds awful to me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and it's gonna happen, but I think, I think what happens is it costs them a good chunk of change to update it on the Xboxes and the PlayStations. So they're like, okay, we're not, we're not gonna do it all the time. Whereas on PC, it's just like, you send Valve a file and they're like, okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A little bit, a little bit. That's a pretty cool zombie game in VR, um, and it's got the loot element where you can go into a house, but you actually reach behind you and you pull out a backpack, and then like you're opening drawers, grabbing stuff physically in the drawers and jamming them into your backpack to take back the base. That sounds pretty awesome. It's awesome, like looting in that game is like, this feels so fucking cool.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Before a survival game, uh, it'd be, I wish it was expanded upon, but, and then the zombie fight's fun too, cause you might have a knife and a zombie comes out, you just jam it into his head. Like you actually have to physically do all that stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] One day, one day, someone's gonna make a badass zombie survival game in VR. It's gonna happen.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, I think so too. Yeaah, it's, I mean, we're, I mean, it's amazing what they can do already. 10 years, it's gonna be even better. 20 years, it's gonna be crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So yea, that's what a lot of kids, you know, I mean, they still play console games, but, and this is just based on what I've seen my kid do, they just want to put on the headset.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I heard the second one was good, just recently people were going like, everyone gives the second one's also good, the third one was apparently shit. Yea, but you can't watch the second one, cause the third one's the end of it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So the third one being shit makes the second one shit by default. In my opinion. Got em! I don't know, I didn't watch it. I don't know. The conclusion to your story is it sucks. And who gives a shit about the second one?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think, oh man, okay, I got one, but the best, uh, ending to a second one going into a third movie.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That you guys can think of. I think my favorite is, is that Pirates of the Caribbean 2?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Where it's like, Johnny Depp just got eaten by a giant squid, Anthony just stood up cause he's like, yes, this one's fucking awesome, I know. He's saluted.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yeaah, I love in that, uh, Second Pirates, Johnny Depp's got eaten by a squid and they're like, oh, how are we gonna get Jack Sparrow back? And it's like, ooh, I know a captain that knows how to sail these waters and it's the bad guy from the first movie who you thought was dead?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like, okay, music swells up, and you're like, alright, alright, I wanna see where this goes. I thought that was a great ending.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like, you know, I was, I was into pussy. So, you know. I wasn't getting any, but I was trying to look for the trashy face. He was tablin', you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, they just, they just got, uh, yeah, I just got the dick pills.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm fine, thanks for asking. Actually, we are visiting your area in a couple of days, and we are providing you free estimates. Free? How do they make money?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, and yeaah, got it, and like, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, like, uh, like, uh, uh, uh, uh, tomorrow, day after tomorrow, every Saturday.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, Tuesday is, uh, uh, Wednesday, right? Uh, today is Tuesday, sir.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And uh, there might be a VHS player.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's just filled with chili. All the food.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Dralis, do you remember the name of the barbecue place that we ate at?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Here's the thing, okay, okay, so here's where we're at. Uhm, and I'll say this, just for an update, uh, got an MRI today.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Here's what I started thinking, I'm like, alright, Simon, Duralius...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Me with brain cancer is better than both of them because, and I'm counting on this, I'm counting on this so much. You guys will trip all over yourselves and somehow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Here's the thing is that like I was riding a wave coming in like of confidence. It's like, yeah, I'm going to, yeah, we're going to beat this thing. And, and then I was like, you know who else I'm going to beat.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] These knuckleheads fuck up all the time in Arc. So you guys all heard it here first.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and we didn't, uh, spoiler alert, we didn't die. We didn't die. It's been a lot of fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, let's go around the horn real quick. And we each say, if you can remember, uh, which most of us can, I guess, uh, your favorite horde base. Oh man. Talking about, is it successful ones? You just said favorite now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, you know, we're talking about streaming while we're camping. We need to work out a deal with some, like, RV company. Yes. Where we do, like, different places that we camp, where we set up, you know, a camper, stream, like, different cities, take a month to do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Damnit, the cheesecake, their menu, their menu is here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Neves, check your phone. How many Chick-fil-A points do you have right now?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wow. Even the gays love him. It's true.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'd like, I'd like to, uh, get some chicken nuggets from one of my best friends.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which reminded me that you did, uh. Murder mystery? Yea, murder mystery.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I can see that happening where someone looks at you and they're like alright I'm in.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I love that you played a character named Joe Coconut that was a southern gentleman because we don't have coconut trees.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey guys, what's happening? Welcome to the Niebz Gaming Podcast. Hello, hello. So, uh, a lot of you guys, well, the guys here, are tired of Ark. I'm not, for one. I think you guys have a bad taste in your mouth just because we played what you call it last. Genesis? Genesis 2. That's part of it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, well let me tell you, I don't know when we're gonna play this, uhm, but I pitched this idea to Abstro and he's like, if we do that, I'll probably do it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So here it is, it's kinda like us versus an alpha tribe, and the alpha tribe is Simon. Cause Simon has like a big castle with, uh, defenses, what you call it, uh, what's the good armor, ascendant armor, ascendant weapons, maybe a wyvern, a giga.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No. Like you would still be taming stuff as you go, right? We might kill one of your T-Rexes and you have to replace it. Right. We'll figure all that out again.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, good chance. I would say this though, we don't win until we overtake your castle.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, you can respawn until, you know, we might kill you, you get all your good stuff, now we got some Ascended Armor and some better weapons, but you get to respawn and, you know, you have more stuff back at your place.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Give us boundaries. We can't leave a certain biome. Yeah, we'll figure that out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He doesn't. I don't feel uncomfortable. Yeaah. I do, I know the answer's already and it is we would have to get rid of something. We gotta get rid of either Pulsar, Gen Zero, Seven Days, or Battlefield Friends.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If I, if I, no, if I had to pick one right now, it'd probably be the new one, or one of the classics like The Center or The Island.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yea, the original map is not that big, so, you can find it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Did y'all see it? Read that article where they can grow wood in a lab? No, but that sounds awesome. Huh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, uh, I don't know how close we are to doing that on a big scale, but imagine that, you just grow a rockin' chair, or you want a really big wood beam, you grow it in a warehouse.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I love it. I'm curious to see what that leads to. Kidding.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I heard it was faster. When I read the article. And that was a week ago.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, like, even if it's twice as fast, that's, uh, quicker than waiting twenty-some years for something.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is that from the bamboo wood part itself or like those little, you know they have the little like paper in the middle? Yea, I don't know. You ever break open bamboo?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] People where I grew up were always growing up planting bamboo and regretting it later.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I just, I just pulled up Poppy Playtime to watch a video just to see what it was. And what really interests me is I've been seeing these little lines on the play bar. I didn't know what they were until just now. You know what I'm talking about? Like a waveform almost. Have y'all seen this? No.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, so you can kind of hover over. That's pretty cool.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm curious, I'm gonna go look at our last seven days to die video whenever, uh, parkour champion over there- Oh, I guarantee it, yeaah. I'm curious right now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Those are the moments. Now listen, this brings me to something, uh, not many, but I saw a few comments saying that I walked on that mine on purpose.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's crazy. It might look like, I don't know, but here's what you gotta remember. A good bit of time passed from the time you set that down till we actually went in. A lot of stuff was cut out. So much stuff. I for, yeah, I just didn't even think about it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you told me. I made a middle note. I was like, okay, I gotta be careful.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I love when you come to the office, like even when we did a loanish in seven days, you'd come to the office and you didn't know how somebody's recording went and they're outside like, oh boy, it's a bad day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For the rewards, because we like to have rewards with them. So one idea is whoever wins, whichever team wins or person wins, they get like a nice tailored suit, you know? Like they win, they win a trip to the soup store. They get all gussied up and maybe get to go somewhere in their suit. I don't know. Jungle Rapids or somewhere.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think one trick's fine. Yeah. You like how you wanna see a trick? Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ah, that was cool. I'm done. That's true, yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So here's what I've heard, uh, as you grow in magic power, your, like, strength and fortitude or maybe things like that go down. You're not as much of a tank anymore.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well this morning I came in, I thought I was going to play in GTA, and after I said, we're playing Long Dark together. I flipped the script on you. Basically side by side, I never even owned the game, I didn't own the game until this morning. Yeah. And he's saying how hard it is. Right. So now I'm just jumping, I was thinking how to do the menus, or how to craft or store.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was good. So, we're playing at the same time. He's playing on the hardest level and I'm playing on an easier level than him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I'm the one below him. Cause I've never seen anything. But yea, so everything I'm learning, I'm learning on screen with him telling me, like through a radio or something. Nice! And we're surviving in two different places. It was fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I went to Charlotte this weekend. I didn't plan on going. Well, when did you find out you were going? The night before. Oh, I could see that going well with you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's a fun drive. Yeah, I was not in the state of mind to go to Charlotte. So my wife was going to visit a friend. Yeah. Who's from Louisiana. Okay. And she's like, well, I'm just gonna be here. And she's like, oh, I'll come down and meet you. I'll get a car, rent a place, a hotel, and we'll spend the evening together. And then she's like, you gotta go with me. And I'm like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anyway. That's a three and a half hour drive. Yea, it's not horrible.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not a good day to drive. Because I don't really see Labor Day as a real holiday. I think that's like, something people made up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, she was gonna go without me. And, uh, she wanted to try Turo. You ever tried Turo? No. Mm-mm. That's like Airbnb for cars? Oh. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So you do the app, you start looking for cars in your area, and she's like, hey, here's like an old Mercedes, I'm gonna get a Mercedes. An old one? It was like, well, I mean. I mean, well you said it. It's brand new for me. Okay. But it's probably, I don't know, two thousand something. Diesel?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anyway, it's, this was our first experience with Turo. Yeah. I might need more experiences cause we pick it out and I'm thinking.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, okay. Slightly shady. It might be a little shady. You don't know. And the house, it has the address number on it, has like a notice, like no one lives there. I'm like, okay, this is weird.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You don't know. Anyway, wait a minute, and the guy pulls up, and he's like, oh, sorry I'm late, and he doesn't even look at that house, like that's just maybe a house he, he put a dress in for. Okay. I don't know, anyway. Nice, nice guy. Yeah. But, we grab the car, and we're like, alright, this is cool, it's dirty. Like, the carpet's just a mess.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No. We drove one of our cars and we dropped our other car off. Perfect. You guys are smart. Yeaah. So, uh, so yeaah. Cars and Masters may be just under a quarter tank of gasoline.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Empty beer cans on the floorboard. And part of the grill was broke off up front. It was just a visual thing. It was from an angry night. Oh yea, in the passenger side window where the tanning is, it was like curling off, peeling off around the edges.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We'll probably try it again. So, you make it sound like that was your only choice.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh really? Okay. Okay, North, North Davidson Street or something like that. I feel like I have. Yeah, it's fun. It's like a little, uh, bars and art district, restaurants. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anyway. The place was huge. We had a great time. We found a place called, uh, Noda 101 Karaoke Bar. Oh. And, uhm, that's where we hung out with, uh, my wife's friend from school. There you go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So fantasy football is a lot like having a financial manager. Yeaah? You just, it's better just to randomly pick someone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So that's just two of you actually. I was gonna say six to eight hundred. That's even bigger.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do you know they, they vaccinate raccoons in the wild? Have you heard this?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. I read an article where they have edible fish flavored pellets that they drop from airplanes into forests and raccoons eat this stuff and get vaccinated for rabies.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Calmness and aggression. It's the intent. But not the actual goal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But if it becomes available, we should think about it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] While I was in the Marine Corps? Was it like you were in the Marines? I was in. How long were you in at that point?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You find out how hard you bite. Is it like this? Is it like, you know, sometimes you eat an olive and they're not pitted?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Giraffes have pretty long tongues. They do. I may have told you this story, but I was in Sydney once at the Taronga Zoo or one of those zoos and they had a blind giraffe named Hope.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And she would just come up to the place where people stand and she couldn't see so she just, the tongue would just come out like, hey, there it is, put a carrot on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, and as soon as she felt the food, she just, like, slap it up. What a life.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but it's great to converse with people, but sign language is pretty effective too. And now you can just think it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you don't have a conversation that way. Like, you're hoping this gets to the point where it's just exchanging information like we are now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I like to think what would it be like, and it's not just with girls, it could be just a person, and you're like, man, why would you wear that? Right, yeah, you smell. What's up with your stink? Did you forget deodorant today? Sorry.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which makes me think, you told me that, uh, the show Love on the Spectrum was good. Yep. And did you see season one and two of the Australian one?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, I know you guys haven't seen it, but I will say this. Mark and Chloe love Story of the Century right there. Okay. And his friend Ryan cracks me up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're just, to the point. They speak very, just honestly.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I watch, sometimes I watch this, uh, YouTube channel. I'm not gonna say what it is. But it has to do with, like, Central America and traveling. Okay. And so I've watched a few, cause I'm curious about that part of the world. Who is it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know. Let me finish my story. Okay. It seems a little weird to me. So, so there's this couple and they travel around and they're all over like Central and South America and I don't watch it a lot. Just every now and then it'll pop up my feed. I'm like, okay, I want to see what they're saying about this, this particular city.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I've been watching it a while, and I start watching, and I notice his girlfriend's not there. Oh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Dog's there. Okay, she didn't get the dog. So I get through this whole video wondering where she is and at the end, he wants to thank his girlfriend, not the girlfriend before. His new girlfriend. I thought this was a joint channel. Wow. Like, he got the dog, girlfriend's gone, he's got this new girlfriend.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know what happened, but anyway, like next week I watched another video, the new girlfriend's in it, and I'm thinking that's too soon? This was their channel!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What about these people that their whole channel is built around an animal? How's that go?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well sometimes, there's different types of TED Talks. Some are the big stage, the big red carpet, and then there's like the community theater ones.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This isn't where they put somebody else's poop in him, is it? Cause that's a thing too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Simon? Well, according to the last podcast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Are we together? Next week we'll change it no matter what we say. Alright, Nibs and I, because yea, Absarro and Nibs have been in a lot of things together lately. So it's Absarro and Anthony.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, I'm jumping in here and there. I think I probably got three or four loot drops from a zombie total in two weeks. I don't even have a motorcycle or a bicycle yet.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You could loan up your whole hotbar with pipe weapons pretty quick. Mhm. And just switch to each one. Do you need a work table? Not for those. Just make them in your personal. Yup.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, yeaah, that's a little help from the start. Man, when I started, the stamina was so bad for me. And, uh, it would have been a way to go in the alone-ish series. I, uhm, I was lootin' a house, and I was going down to the basement, and I was like, man, if someone comes up from behind, so I'll just, I'll put a couple blocks there. Little wood blocks at the top of the door.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Got out of the basement, making my way through his heart, cleared it out, got to the boxes, and I was like, my food and water was so low, my stamina was just nil. I couldn't even break into the boxes, like the loot, as I was at the end of this dead end. Couldn't break into, I couldn't swing once.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was that bad. And then I was like, well, I can't get out. I just...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I drank poison water, contaminated water, and I mean I had to fight that off after, but I had a little stamina so I could break out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wow. I think it's adorable that she likes watching you do that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My favorite. I feel like they added a lot more, uh, dogs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Here's an idea. Uhm, if we do this on Nomad, the difficulty setting, we start there. If any of us get past, if two teams get past the first Horde Knight,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We should up the difficulty right then. I like that. I don't mind that. So we can make it of short order on the back end of the first horde now. Right, right, right. Alright. Deal? Deal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Connect. You'd almost think people that get cauliflower ear would opt for ear replacement. Well they don't really care.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, those teeth are so cute. I love it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She gets along with another cat really well. There's a cat girl, you know, I've been seeing. Your dog and the cat are best buddies? They, yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's awesome. They go right to each other. Esme and Emily are like besties and it's fucking great to watch.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, just a quick question out of curiosity, what's the longest run of toilet paper the tooth weasel left for your daughter, you know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they previously, they didn't have a millipede on record that had over 900.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, the millipedes. The other thing inside, they, they just, uh, the new, you know, the Hubble? Telescope, yeah. Yeah, the new one, the next one just, just launched. Or, I mean, it's like so much more powerful. Can't wait to see those pictures. Oh my god, yeah, they're gonna be, but it's, um, yeah, it's exciting. I forget what it's called, but there you go. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's really interesting. Guys, little pro tip for you out there. Go stock up on those disposables.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, so it's like a sniper's delight and obviously they wanted people in vehicles all over them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You remember that, Simon? I do. I was like, you go, what are you doing tonight? I'm gonna go play tonight. I'll jump in with you. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know. Uhm, I like the game. I haven't played it much because of seven days lately. I just wanted to get in there a little bit. But, uh, the new Warzone map. Mhm. Yeah. Beautiful.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, he's right there! I hear him! You could curse people's weapon, maybe every like third or fourth bullet is like a hot dog coming out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What a great niche. And there's not been, like if you think about it, I was thinking about it the other day, it was like, there's nobody that's carrying that torch?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know what I mean? Like, there's not another weird Al that's gonna have that name. It's a different- Not on that scale. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like when you come to our show. Those are real instruments. They're real. And we're real. Yep. We don't play them. Or anything. We're not playing our instruments at our show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's all good. I just want to verify for, clarify for the uh, the listeners. Did you say verify or clarify? Did you say verify or clarify? Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We want to talk about that, uh, since we're a gaming channel. Uhm, you played some of the, uh, what's it? Bit? What? What? Battle bit? Battle bit?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How fun would it be if you could call in like an airstrike, but to call in an airstrike, you have to play a mini game that lasts about a minute.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm gonna go ahead and get this out of the way, keep the flow going. I'm pimping out the movie I worked on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yep, birdiesthemovie.com. You can go backslash Neebs after that and it uh, just shows how many come from.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, check it out. It's, uh, fun. Local, uh, you know, independent movie. What do you give it? Scale of one to ten. What am I gonna give it? Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I'm not going to go, I think it's a, I think it's an enjoyable watch. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think there's some definitely, there's some good laughs in it. Of course I'm biased, but I mean, I'll give it a, I'll give it a seven.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm gonna help out having other videos keep going on the channel, cause we need those too, so. That's true. You know, it's kind of a team effort, so why are we pointing fingers all the time? I know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like what Simon, now he's sat back in his chair, not by the mic, and it's like he's exhausted from this. I mean, uhm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What we getting? I'd imagine some taste buds. There's people that are just wired to DNA. Their taste buds just aren't as acute or something. I don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I still have issues. I've heard good things, of course, for years now, but uhm, is that, can you go, is there like the key, the hole, the keto hole? Is that a thing? Keto hole? The hole? Is that where you can go in the hole?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kinda. That's when it's a high enough dose.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Darkness Falls. Such a cool mod. A mod by one dude, and that adds a whole bunch of layers of, um, complexity to it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, the, uh, I think it adds 12 new zombie types. And uhm, they're not all just like zombie zombies, there's like a mutated spider, incubus, succubus.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's good. You know how you, uh, you've got the different levels of pickups in the normal game? Like, what, do they go as high as six? Remember getting a level six something? I was like, ooh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and because you can't repair them so early in the game, they kind of like wear down like playing Breath of the Wild.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like do I keep this? Do I just scrap it now that it's like done working?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. They do. It's all speculation right now, but I just think the game is, it extends a lot of it out differently. Like the beginning game lasts a lot longer, uhm, just makes it harder to get stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And there is a story, there's a loose story in this, like none of us have really paid attention to, but it is in there, and I- there's like an endgame, uh, base, essentially.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I had so much fun the other day. I died a lot, but I had a lot of fun. God, it was madness for a few of us.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh my god. Console people are getting kinda fucked. I have tried it on Xbox, it was brief, and just going through the menus, like don't even, just do yourself a favor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like if that's your only option and you're fine with all that, but like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The menus are pretty thorough. There's a bunch and just clicking around with your little toggle stick. And they don't have all the updates either, do they? No, they don't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The big band at the third one is like just a, you know, got all this body armor and stuff like that. Probably shoots grenade launchers, something like that. It just looks like a base wrecker.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh god. So, kind of like in Darkness Falls, uh, they've got, uhm, titans? They call them titans? Okay. But it's just a, it's a big...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You die once, I hate to see what I'm at right now, but then you're down to 75, then down to 50.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Really? Yeah, but then when you eat proper and stuff, you build it back up. I know. It's not like you're just end there. I died twice though, I don't remember going down hardly. Yeah, I don't remember either. But I was too busy trying to survive more. Right. Yeah, it was a rough night.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My heart was going just as excited as a, well, in the short lived run I had in, you know, the competitive side.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I was in so little. I think I did two episodes last time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, it'd be cool if uhm, even if the ship was on the horizon, maybe your dog barks a little bit or something. Like, I don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, that dog is adorable. If you tamed a dolphin that follows your ship and it kind of could revive you or something, like, you know, they could go, they could go fun with the animals. Oh, that would be awesome. Something.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're probably not too focused on Easter eggs right now, huh? I would imagine not. More bitches.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, you know they're in a comfortable place in a comfortable state of the game when they can add a Megalodon. Yes, yea, yea, you would hope. But, uh, people would imagine if they added something like that now. What are you working on over there, Bill?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I didn't- Well, Mark Hamill is a- No, blonde ladies. Oh, you didn't say that. Sorry.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Everybody needs to chill the fuck out. Chill the fuck out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Exactly, and that is anti-free speech in every fucking way.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, it's, it's the media, it's everything. Hmm? Yeaah, no. Outraged sales.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think everybody matters, but nobody cares and nobody has to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But anyway, I don't wanna go out negative there. I'm glad you guys didn't come, cause you all suck dick.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Windows, Android, iOS, Mac OS and Linux. Even your Android TV supports NordVPN and they have over 5200 servers in 60 countries. So you can find a server near you for better speed or not near you because with NordVPN you have options at the wazoo and kiss bandwidth throttling. Bye bye.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because NordVPN encrypts all your traffic so your internet provider can't slow down your streaming speed. And when it comes to speed, it's confirmed by speed tests that NordVPN is the fastest VPN out there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they have a fantastic deal to share with our community. So go to NordVPN.com slash Neebs to get a two year plan.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, yes, a good water, which by the way, which makes me think of, I thought we were gonna be getting, hopefully soon, a water cooler. Yep, I have it. We're gonna pipe it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Spoilers coming up everyone. And we'll let you know when they're coming. They haven't come up yet. We'll tell you when they're just about to come up. That's on you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, well, that's on all of us when we say something spoil-y. That's what's coming up. Spoil-y. Yeah. Spoil-ish. And if you haven't seen it, then yeah, that's fine. We can get you to just... Yeah, we're going to talk about the episode that


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, we were going to be spoiling it. The way I figured we'd be spoiling it is, or at least just talking about the episode. Like, oh, it was, you know, and then getting to the fact that you died. Cause that's what you were talking about for this whole time. He never said that. See, I know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So my experience with it, yeah, like you said, you'd mentioned we started first. So we were here at 11 o'clock in the morning.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So here, to me, I'm remembering it from the day, right? Cause that day, to me, was like, don't die, right? Like, this is the day, this is day one. Day one, you can't die. Day one, we, we, of course, I'm thinking I'm gonna die, but no, I got, I got.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You would think, so we get through it, we get through it barely, right? And it's like, okay, that, that was crazy, but all right. And now I'm leaving the office. Usually we're all here for the rest of the day. So my later on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The reason why I'm going through this whole thing is because from my experience, I was like, all right, foof, I made it. I'm going to go home and then it gets to be like, I don't know, six o'clock or something. And I text or a question and then he answers back. Like, did you hear the news? I died.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I'm just like, this is no fucking way. And I just texted back like, yeah, right. And then maybe like 20, 30 minutes go by and I'm like, he didn't write back. And I'm like, he might've died. And I'm like, did you really? I still have gotten no response from that. I'll text you back soon. Yeah, I'll text.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But it was shocking to me, very much so, and I felt your pain all through that night.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And when I watched it, I was really happy to see it, cause I watched it just, like, pretty soon after you posted it up for us. And, uh, I was like, oh yeah, I get to see, like, what the fuck was he thinking? You know what sucks? I haven't-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It is going to be, so now, you know, it would be, well, start your death pool with your friends now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's a lot of work. However it's, whatever it is, start it. I'm curious to see who, uh, who goes next even though I know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No. Not yet. But you just kinda had a little spoiler there. I don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You ever pull into the driveway after a trip to the grocery store and then you realize that you forgot one of the key ingredients that you need for dinner?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Whenever and however you want it, right now and right to your door. Along with the restaurants that you love, you can now get groceries and other essential items in under an hour delivered with DoorDash. And with DoorDash you get everything in one app.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ordering is easy and your items will be left outside your door when you choose contactless delivery drop off.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And for a limited time, our community will get 25% off


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And zero delivery fees on their first order of $15 or more when you download the DoorDash app and enter code Neebs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's 25% off up to a $10 value and zero delivery fees on your first order when you download the DoorDash app in the app store and enter code Neebs. Don't forget that's code Neebs for 25% off your first order with DoorDash subject to change in terms of apply. Thank you DoorDash. And we're back. Yeah. Man. So.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Neves? Yeah? Jump right to you. Yes? Cause you were away recently. I was. Had a good time to be away.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It can though because you happen to leave, you got an extra day because we had a little snow storm, not like snow storm, an ice storm in the probably much more so in the Charlotte area.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know what, you give me the details, maybe I'll go on this cruise. I need the deets. For a short little cruise.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No kiddies allowed in my place. Right? No kids. They're just awful. Or in Mexico. Yeah, cause, cause really that's why we went back, we ended up going to the same place like within like three or four years, but it was like, it's so nice to not be around any stupid, dirty little kids.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Neeps takes good jumping photos. You ever noticed that? No.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yes. I've seen at least a few where if he's away...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's gonna be a photo of him in the air leaping and you're gonna, and he's like perfectly in focus with a smile with his beautiful toned body there. Cause it's usually like with just shorts, you know? He's like practically naked.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you've got a small business, you know, there's nothing more valuable than your time. So stop wasting it on trips to the post office. As far as I'm concerned, this is a no brainer. Stamps.com makes it easy to mail and ship right from your computer. Save time and money with stamps.com and send letters and packages for less.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Any package, anywhere you want to send it. And once your mail is ready, just schedule a pickup or drop it off. No traffic, no lines. You save time and money with stamps.com. There's no risk. And with promo code Neebs, you get a special offer that includes a four week trial plus free postage and a digital scale.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No longterm commitments or contracts. Just go to stamps.com, click the microphone on the top of the homepage and type in needs that stamps.com promo code needs stamps.com. Never go to the post office again.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, with the intelligence of pigs, I swear to God, I don't care how good they might taste, like, I mean, they're so damn smart, and they're really close to, I think they're really close to us as humans, aren't they, too, genetically? Yeah, in a big way. We don't have tails.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wonder so, I mean, I wonder how much it was altered and you'd hope to God that the pig would just look like a normal pig. The pig had a mustache.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So that's the thing, the heart grows. I guess.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That might be an issue even sooner, but if you think about it, like if technology's getting better and you go, okay, wow, I got a pig heart, even if they say they're hoping for 10 years, I'd be like, all right, that's cool. Cause in 10 years there should be better technology for me. And at the very least, if I'm still alive with this pig heart in 10 years, I'll take another pig heart.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't think I've ever experienced truffles in a way that made me like I've had like, you know, shitty things like, like they'll have like macaroni and cheese. I love truffles.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't even know, I like, I would wish I could be exposed to, and which makes me think of, it would be fun to, maybe we could do a video about this, I was trying to think of something that would be fun to do food wise, cause, I don't know. Simon needs a $500 truffle.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] With you guys kind of liking it and then us having really no experience with it, just to talk about it and even show what we're eating, but we don't show us.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I have eaten stuff too, but I'm just like, I guess find something that's really, really known to be very good and I'll have an opinion on it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Some truffles are much more expensive than others. So I'm thinking like the most expensive truffles. Do you guys have any?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wouldn't think. They just have cheese balls. They do have cheese balls. And I'll just say 20, 21. They win all in on cheese balls.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anyway, go on. It's very human. There's other, yea, you guys can talk about other things. No, I wanna hear this number.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I haven't seen the skyline in a long time. But I should be able to see, like I used to be able to see the Twin Towers from my town. Yeah. So like, on a clear day, I'll probably, you would think, next time I'll try to pay attention and see what I can see.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Awesome. Good for you. It makes me all like nervous.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, and this will go into then the sponsor. Might be a little bit longer, but Masterclass is our sponsor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And in the first, like five videos of the series, he's got like 32 videos in the series. He's talking about standup and what to do. And it was just so nice to have a guy like that. I should probably watch.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just go out there and tell your stories that you would amuse other people with. They don't even have to have punchlines. They're just amusing stories and you work on it from there and you don't have to build all this pressure about having these things that you have to


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, he's not a stand up guy. No, he's not, but he's known for.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Writing. Writing. And he actually, as a high school student, interviewed some of the best stand-up comedians on Long Island in the 80s. And he's worked around some of the best stand-ups of all time. And hearing a lot of his stuff is from Gary Shanley, who did a lot of stand-up and a lot of comedic writing. He was beloved.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And basically he's using a lot of the stuff that he's heard from these like iconic comedians that are saying, this is what you want to do. Cause they were trying to help him get his act a little bit better. They were kind enough to mentor him and give him advice on not only like stand up stuff, but scripts.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you know what to do and where to go with that. And it's great. I love it. And I highly recommend you check it out. So now for the professional sponsorship details, get unlimited access to every masterclass. And as a member of our needs community, you will get 15% off an annual membership.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Go to Masterclass.com slash Neebs now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's masterclass.com slash needs for 15% off masterclass. Thank you, masterclass. And the rally is back to you and you do and stand up. It makes it. I'm very happy that you're doing it. I'm still talking about it and scared, but good for you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeah. Oh, I want to think about what that liquid is dripping from the tip.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I always thought it'd be great to have visuals and of course people do it all the time. But I think, uh, yeaah, whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 25 years ago when I was scared of thinking about this, I'm like, oh, a slideshow would be great because it's your notes for you. Okay. What's that? Oh, bam. Okay. So this stupid ass funny image is hopefully going to get you to laugh and remind me of the story that I have related to it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, you know you have to paint this picture now. Okay. What was crazy looking about her?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How were the other ones, were they even like paying attention to or were they just like, usually when I see a flight attendant, they're sitting down looking at their phone. Small plane.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yes, she did the, uh, yeaah, it was kinda like a, like, I could die on that flight and I'd be fine. I'd go down happy. She'd be, she'd be like, yeaah, she'd probably jump right on top of you too. You wanna go on the way down? Yeaah, let's go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I always think about it in my head, I'm like, if the shit hits the fan, like, when you ever, like, when you sit in that seat, do you ever take...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I look prefer to do the aisle, but I'm not going to pay extra for it. And like nine out of 10 times, they'll say, Oh, okay. Well, do you mind sitting in the exit row? And I go, no.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, so that's the one maybe we briefly talked about. So it's got like four big blades.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, that's not much money for a lot of people. There's a lot of rich people that spend that on a fucking pickup truck. You see how good drones are.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It must be like crazy experience to be able to fly like the drone. Can you imagine that? Even I have controlled drones in a way where you get into it and go, oh yeaah. And if you're in the sea, it's so nice. The expensive ones are smooth. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And at any point, you're able to hit that button or be able to say- Go home.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, go home or sit still because you've lost control because maybe you threw up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ada Hop posted that she has 600 gigabytes of footage. What? If she's late on any videos, ever again, she's gotta answer to that. To 600 gigabytes. What the hell?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's really dumb. So, so Nibs, how often do you play, would you say?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause yeaah, it is tough getting together with your friends, especially when they don't call you to squad up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'll get into Battlefield and normally it's me and maybe one other person. And then I'll be like, God, this movement and gunplay, it's just not, it's just not as good as other games that I play and I want to play the other games. And I'm like, I need an upgraded version of what I'm playing right


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They have these Christmas trees that are objectives. And if you hold the Christmas trees for a long period of time, you keep getting presents more and more loot. Which is a great idea. Yeah. Yeah. But everybody knows that you're at that Christmas tree too, because you got a beacon up in the sky. If you get coal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And we've tried to third party and then all of a sudden he's coming after us. So he appears and disappears, but he, you know. He'll chase your ass down. Yea, and he takes a lot of bullets, but if you kill him, then you get some shit. But, I mean, like, it's just. First time you chased me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're traveling from here to there. Uhm, not battlefield. Talking about battlefield again. Yeah, exactly. That's true. That is one thing. But you have multiple vehicles in battlefield, but which are not as many in war zone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's true. You can just say, hey, you wanna play Battlefield? That's true. You haven't even reached out, so I would drop Warzone to play with you guys. Okay, that's a New Year's resolution, guys.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is it one or two? It might be two. Either way.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, here's what you'll run into with your idea, Neebs, is that, um, friends and family will have a very difficult time coordinating Christmas together with this big month where you're just like, well, let's have it here, here, here, and then, then it's a fight and- How do you even start that, you know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I actually know I'm getting an air fryer for Christmas. They're fun, they're just fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's a very, yeah, it's a very famous monologue. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've, you know, sitting here, just looking around, I noticed that, I think, Duralis and I, are we wearing the same socks?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, but that prompted me, like, just this whole conversation, it's like, what?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What else could we make? Cause we've talked about this before, like the crocs and the robes and-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But we gotta, we gotta think bigger. What else? Cars. We should have cars.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. That you can get inside. Life size. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well the band Kiss, they have their own casket. Yea? Yea, you could buy a kiss casket. It's a kiss casket.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sounds about right, yeaah. You see those guys that, those African guys that, that dance with your casket, like, oh I'd love that. It's a huge meme, like, but yeaah. Yeah, I've seen the video. Yeaah. It's like the, what do they call them?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know where to carry your stuff in.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But, but after Jedi came out, yeaah, there was some sort of Christmas thing that they did. I believe. They did the first holiday.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've seen commercials for them. Is it one of the belts with the mistletoe on the buckle?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We should, we should make something that nobody wears. I didn't say sell it. I say we just go out. We go clubbing. All of us with our boots and buckles. Another one of your br-brilliant marketing ideas. No, this is just for us. It's just for us. Ours alone. Ours alone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When I was watching, after you brought that up to me, you're like, oh, watch this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was watching it, watching one of the big hordes, like just full gameplay, I started getting anxiety, I'm like, no, no, no, shit, shit, shit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That'd be funny if every camp had their, had like an individual like currency, like at the one camp you gotta use the ears, at the other camp you use the nose.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now there's, there's a few games I actually want to go over and, cause one just came up and, uh, our friend Aztec here was talking about it. Knockout City? Has anyone played that? I've heard really good things about it. Yeah, it looks like dodgeball.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's dodgeball, uh, team-based multiplayer action game with crossplay coming to PS4. Yeaah. It's an EA game. Yeaah, it is an EA game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know what spray it with, I guess you spray it with...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, no, I think I'm, I'm expecting it too. You're going to see all sorts, cause already they have season one. So season two is going to come out around football season. They're going to have like Baker Mayfield and all these other NFL players. I don't, I'm just guessing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Knockout City looks interesting. The other one, Absar- Absarow and- Are we done rhyming? Yea, we're done pretty much.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Another one. Biomutant. Yep, that looks pretty.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now what they say that combines like Breath of the Wild, along with...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, some other stuff, but you can, yeah, you can customize the way you fight in that game. Like your fighting style, obviously, uh, I think the aesthetics, you can like all your clothes, but you play as some sort of like Jackalope or raccoon, pillow fight.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now we also recently got an email about, this is probably the most interesting title. Right, Kung Fu Jesus. Did you look at it? Yeah, it doesn't look like Jesus-y so much, cause I know that there was another game out there, it was like a fighting game with Jesus. This is some sort of like, yeah, it's psychedelic and I don't even- Wow.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's some other stuff, like there's a spaceship and boats. Okay. And nothing looks like Jesus. Was it Jesus? Was it just a Hispanic person?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I-I-I don't know, man. But if you're gonna make a game and you're like, oh, what's a good title? Kung Fu Jesus? Like, immediately I'm like, okay, yeaah, I wanna see this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But Jesus, you know, it could be Jesus, uh, with a different outfit on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like how in America, like all the pictures of Jesus, he's got like a swimmer's build. He's like ripped. White as can be. That makes sense.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I see. I see it every once in a while on Facebook. It's like, uh, if, if you don't share this, you know, see how many people will share this picture of Jesus or that kind of thing. And it's you and McGregor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know. I didn't either. Get this! Get this! Other countries. I saw videos of other countries.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How about this one? Oh, go ahead.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But Nibs, you're right, there's so many different, and App Store too, because it's very niche, like you've got people who are YouTube famous and, you know, hyper-focused on gaming or cooking or whatever, and there's TikTok and,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's, it's insane how many just outlets there are for people to have a platform and gain fame. So I don't think you're gonna, you're not going to have like an Elvis or Michael Jackson because it's, it's going to be very difficult to, I guess. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He was in the train wreck. LeBron James, I think, was in the train wreck. It was that Amy Schumer movie. I didn't see it. Oh yea, I saw that. He wasn't that bad in that. He did fine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I love filmmaking these days where it's just like, yeaah, let's just write it as we go. I think Biff's in it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Here's what I wa- like, I feel like we've all been to- almost all of us have been to Florida this year. Uhm, but-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Here's what I'm trying to do. I'm trying to find like a unique vacation spot. I want to take my daughters on a vacation and I want to find somewhere like unique.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like I was thinking like Chattanooga, Tennessee, cause they have like caves and shit. But.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, Chattanooga seemed interesting, uh, because they have like an aquarium, they've got those caves, you can, there's like a- What about Yosemite or something like that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're probably not national parkists.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] World heritage? Hill country? Arts and crafts? They've got some dolphins? Somehow?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, a great way to poorly affect a gas shortage is by telling people in North Carolina that there's a gas shortage.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think some have been like inspired by some of the older designs, like the Mustang was inspired by like the 6970, um, when, when they sort of redid it. God, I forget when, like mid 2000s.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What does that mean though? Is that just- Probably a buff, like maybe- You think? Or you think some of the stuff we saw was just like, it just makes people happy? Because there's a teddy bear on it. Look, I got a thing, I'm happy now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, he didn't come in Tuesday because they got a COVID test because his daughter was sick. She's always sick. Yeah. Well, she licks toilets. She's got a bad habit. And she goes dancing at the homeless shelters. Well, you know where she got that bad habit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like Beach Burger. In Burger Beach. Yeaah, that too. Space Mammoth. Yeaah. We all like different songs. Yeaah, we do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Can we do a song? I'm always pitching songs to you and you usually shoot them. And they're terrible ideas. Okay, well here's the, can we do, remember sometimes on our streams we did like, like some, uh, what's, TXSnake would, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Can I talk about what I'm excited about? Sure. For seven days? Uh, one, the tinting of the vehicles. Super exciting, cause that's the problem with us. We're color coded. In bikes? Yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. And you can build even some of the props and stuff to go in your house. Uh, or more of the props. Interesting. Uhm, I wonder how farming works.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I used to wear my overalls just for fun when I'd farm. Oh, for sure. You mean in real life? No, just in the game. Oh, in there?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yep. Like when I play GTA sometimes, I like to go to bed before I log out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Science fiction, Neebs. Gotcha. Thanks, Thick.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They must be talking about me. Hey, we're just wondering if like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alpha 20, seven days drops soon, maybe Dralis jumps on it, and then you jump in when you're done with Rust. We're gonna do a Flopski.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was intense, I loved it. I almost had a heart attack a few times. I was stressed out a lot. We did verses, two teams, and you just have


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Who's that? I will say, I think we can say this, it was me and Abstro as a team, and Thicke and Duralis as a team, and yeaah. Let your mind...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, it's just, we have to record two a week, so Anthony has the whole season already, and it's, I don't know when it starts, pretty soon.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, right. I enjoyed that. Yeah, guy. Muck is a great game. Muck, yeah. And so is crab game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Anyway, it's free, guys. So, yeaah. It's a fun, uh, crab game. I think the guy's name's Danny. Something like that. Danny Crabs. Danny McCrabbs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what I- Good. Next. About time. Yeah. So, he's a good guy. That'll sell like hotcakes. Yep, yep.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I kind of do, but. Yeah, I don't, I have no interest in that myself.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but now I got a simulator so I can just practice building a PC in a game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just feel like you should know how to build a PC in today's world.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You would hope, I get that. It's detailed too, like, you know, you start off with the case, and then you're gonna go put the motherboard in, and you gotta put the little screws.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, like you pick, there's a bunch of motherboards and say this motherboard doesn't fit in this tower or this case or whatever and it's pretty deep. So how do you like it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Five minutes, but I had Anthony over my shoulder and Anthony's like, Anthony's like, well maybe you should do a video just to show everybody how much you don't know. And then he could like, be saying, alright Nibs, it's time for the processor. Once I get stuck. But probably no one would care to see that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Simon told him that. He doesn't like talking to you. We all know this. We sent him a group email telling him that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Little bit. Sometimes we hate each other. It's usually work related.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, everyday interactions are fine. Sometimes it's just minutes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I saw the Foo Fighters got in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Yeah, that was, you knew that was going to happen. I heard.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wonder why it didn't do well. Probably cause it's too good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's not even a song. Neves was like, man, this is gonna kill it. No, I said it's not a song. What does better McDonald's or like, Ruth's Chris?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right. We got some more missions to do. Some heists to do. Someday. We're busy animating right now. Yeaah. I would like to go back and do some of those.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The biggest thing is that when we do everything else, once you play the game, we have the footage. We have everybody's angle, and we have the spectator camera. You got what you got. In GTA, you go into Rockstar Editor, and then it's like a whole week of film production.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's true. You put a laser on the wall? Yeah. Gone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, I'm going to bed. Oh wait! Whose shoes are these? Is this a cat toy? I need to buy shoes. I'm getting on, uh, hey, what was that shoe? Remember that used to be a big shoe website?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Shorts come off once you get warm? No. Just leggings at that point?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I'm gonna wear leggings under my jeans. I am like a lizard. I have to be on a hot rock or in the summertime.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're kind of dressed up in a lame way. We had less kids than we've had in a few years, which surprises me because one of these years was a COVID year. Maybe because it was Sunday?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yep. But we, we had a pretty good turnout. I saw, uh, one guy who lives a couple of streets over from me has three daughters. And it was funny cause we only, we only taught this guy a couple of times just


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like him too. He's in 30 Rock. That's a show that if you don't know, I like it. And he was one of Liz Lemon's boyfriends.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] As Techie wanted to go the other day, and I guess nobody was available. She sent me a text saying we're going. I thought, oh, she's got a crowd, so I didn't even respond. She ended up going by herself.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Go. No, the, uh, logistics are not in our favor. Nah. But we should do it before we have a big fallout.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They had kangaroo costumes. And you were looking for an accessory. Only for children. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So wait, like Simon has a card, and I gotta go up and question him?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Wake up, sir! You're being pretty quiet there, Mr. Rums.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's the only name I can think of. It's not a good name for that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You wanted an older name. You wanted like a Mr. Custard or something. Mortimer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sitcom with Corky and his sister the Redhead. Here we go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Mobster. I've got more cowboy stuff than I have mobster stuff. That's what I was guessing. More people that could... You've got a cowboy hat and that's...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It wasn't like I could step in the back and go, nobody's wearing, nobody's wearing costumes. Straight to stage with you. I think I even jumped out because I was proud of it. Yea, you did, you said.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Everyone's just wearing regular clothes. I'm like, ah, I'll just go to my seat.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sit down on my cowboy costume. That's so sad.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Probably. Oops. Because our show was temporarily canceled. Yes. Game was still going.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You don't believe what happens next. Oh boy. I guess I can see why. If you don't watch our channel, and you saw that, you'd be mad. But I didn't think people watched our channel other than our people. They shouldn't. Yea, we don't make videos for those people. No we don't. These are private. Don't look at these. You're not subscribed. Yea, what are you doing here?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nope. Don't hit the alarm. Don't smash the bell.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] See how good we are to you guys? We don't pester you with all that mess.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do you like it when they work it into the context of the story though?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well good, I'm glad we agree on that. Thicc's not here. I don't know if anyone noticed. No, no.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pay any attention. That's not true. No, Anthony said, uh, he was cutting arc and then he wasn't in the part of the video. He's just listening to music, surfing the internet in between.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah! I think that's why you don't, maybe the game's more fun for me, cause you don't, you're not, you know, getting these rewards, your work isn't paying off in the end, cause you're not focused on anything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then once you get tired of that, you pick something else.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Good game, good god I loved playing that game. Now did they add, uhm, where you can add threats into creative?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I got luck. Well you can. We give you permission. Thank you. I don't know if this video has come out yet, but, uh, Gralius wanted us to play, what was it, Crazy Machines? Yea. Crazy Machines 3.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Which is pretty cool. And I, listen, here's what we did. We recorded it separately. I recorded an hour, Dallas recorded an hour, and so did Simon. Kinda like little nightmares in that regard.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's a bunch of dominoes and pieces that move and you're trying to get like say, for example, a ball into a basket. Yeah. And there's pieces missing. So they might give you four or five, six pieces you have to place in there. You don't know where they go, but you got to place it to make this mechanism all work.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I had that feeling, I had that feeling like, I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna solve this. Right. Like, I, this is where I'm gonna stop, and I'm not, I still got like 30 minutes left.


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[Assistant] But I could see, if you like this game, this could be a game that you play one round for weeks. Like you might play with it, and then go, ah, I don't know, I gotta stop. And then go think about it, sleep on it, come back. There's so many in there too, there's so many. That's true. It's pretty cool.


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[Assistant] And I was hatin' it. On my last one I was like, well I ran out of time on one of them. But it wasn't, I was like, okay I'm out of time, but I gotta finish this. I gotta figure this out. Yeah, right. You gotta drive yourself nuts if you don't.


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[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah. Imagine, listen, the fact that you work in this industry might be what's keeping you together.


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[Assistant] What? I mean, I can't imagine what you're going through right now, Dralis.


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[Assistant] Yeah, see I just would have chalked that up to, she got in front of me.


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[Assistant] That sounds like Simon. I know these tones. That's awesome. You think, uh, people like Tom Cruise tell stories like that? No. Mm-mm. Mm-mm. How's that thing? Yeaah. This guy recognized me!


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[Assistant] It's like, yea, you're fucking Tom Cruise, of course. The king of the house. Apparently he's seen Mission Impossible. Hey, honey!


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[Assistant] You never believe what happened at the place, you know where they do the oil? Yeaah. They got the lanes? The three docks in the back? Yeaah. I've heard of those.


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[Assistant] This reminds me, I moved to Australia back in like 2000, 2001, something like that, and I didn't see any Jiffy Loops or any kind of quick oil change place, and I'm like, oh man, if I knew how to start a business, I would be a millionaire in a year or two.


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[Assistant] Listen, that can be really embarrassing to you. I remember once I was a kid, I forget which age. Uh, maybe this old? How tall old is that?


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[Assistant] For you, maybe two. I was a short kid. No, I was a short kid. Oh, you were a short kid? Alright then, uh, five, six. I'd say I was five or six. And I, they had like a dress-up day at school. They're like, I'm like, oh man, I can't wait to dress up and go to school. I'm gonna be a cowboy.


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[Assistant] And then, so I showed up late, I got there late, and the door to the class is in the front of the room, and I thought, they're gonna love this, and I like jumped out,


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[Assistant] I was a cowboy all day. I stuck out. I was the opposite of invisible.


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[Assistant] Oh wait, was that when Colin was Macho Man? Yep.


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[Assistant] You need to have a cue card that's like, you know, like when your throat completely locks up, you're just like, I'm so nervous I can't talk. You got a car that's like, okay, he's really, he's really choking now.


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[Assistant] You'll be fine. I think it's one of those things where you go, yeah, hey, the first, the first 50 shows are gonna suck. But each one, I'm getting better.


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[Assistant] Yeah, if you got up there and just spoke and you were comfortable, I think you would hold everybody's attention.


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[Assistant] You're auditioning for like a, like a hitman or something, or a tough guy. What did you say?


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[Assistant] I'm so glad I don't do that anymore. Yeah, and when you're, when you're, uh, you know, trying to make it, you don't have a lot of money anyway. Driving six hours to somewhere, taking off work, buying gas.


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[Assistant] Where do we go now? Hey, I got my second vaccination today. Today you did? Yeah, this morning.


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[Assistant] And he knows, like he'll come in early sometimes and he knows it's early. And I'll be like, you got 30 minutes. And he'll like go, I'm like 30 minutes. And then he like drops his head and storms out of the room.


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[Assistant] No, he's, he's thinner than he was before. I mean, he put some weight back on, but uh.


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[Assistant] But everything else we buy him is like, dog food.


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[Assistant] Now, now with the, uh, with the whole vasectomy thing, like, probably it was a couple years ago where I said no, definitely no more kids.


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[Assistant] Because I always wanted the boy, you know, because I don't have a, I don't have a son. And when I die, my last name dies, uh, my other cousins who have to sit. Yeah, right. I realized that was a good thing.


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[Assistant] But I had an idea, and I am actually going to adopt a son. It's a gentleman by the name of Micah Parsons. He's a linebacker for Penn State going into the NFL draft this year. CASH MONEY!


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[Assistant] That's, that's all. I don't have to change diaper. He's all grown up. He's through college. We're good. Wow. That's great. Welcome to the family son. Season tickets please.


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[Assistant] I don't think that would happen because like, both of my kids, like,


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[Assistant] We, we, we all sorta like the same things, like I've got one nerd and one- You don't allow them otherwise, do you?


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[Assistant] I allow them to try everything except dance, cause I think dance is shitty.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I always wonder what the goal is. Like... Well, any creative...


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[Assistant] I'll say this, like ballerinas, like the professional ones, and even the ones like, you know, that are up and coming in the world, but they are in control. Physical specimens, like they are, like, if you want to call it an athlete, they have so much control over their body and their core.


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[Assistant] I, for those of you who don't know, we live in Wilmington, North Carolina. I would like to give a big congratulations to my friend Derek Brunson. He's an MMA fighter. He just recently, uh, had a fight. He was the headliner of the fight and he beat a guy named Kevin Holland. Did you watch the whole fight? Yeah.


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[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, and uh, yeah, I love it when I see other people from our town, you know, doing big things. So congratulations to Darryl.


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[Assistant] The Steelers? Yeah, yeah. What are you talking about? I think it's, it's the last name, Hightower.


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[Assistant] It's like Highsmith or Hightower. Yeaah, there's a kid from, uh, from Wilmington here. Yeaah, who plays for the Steelers.


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[Assistant] And the same, the same guy that trains my daughter in speed and agility trains him.


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[Assistant] There's a whole website devoted to throat artists that I can show you.


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[Assistant] I would love, I would love to get like a fake periscope made that suctions on and while someone's parked just put it on top of their stupid squatted truck.


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[Assistant] My jeep's lifted, but no, I'm not, I'm not squatting it. No, no, because I'm- Is that what's called squatting? Yeah, it's called squatting. I didn't know that until- I'm a grown ass man. No, cause my, my daughter, my daughter, she-


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[Assistant] She comments all the time about the idiots. And I was like yea, if you were, if you were a little sister ever bringing home somebody that drives that, you can just pack your shit and go. I don't know why they, it doesn't look good. It doesn't look good.


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[Assistant] And, and they all have their Instagram tags on it, like, and that's like, that, that is like the ultimate douche, like, indicator. Yeah, that's peak douchebag. That's peak, yeah, that, that's their, that's their last form, if they were like a Pokemon.


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[Assistant] But you're like a, you're a minimalist though, Neebs. You don't really, yeah, stuff like new stuff or spending money on like really stuff stuff, yeah, is not your thing. And I can certainly respect that.


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[Assistant] I'm the opposite with guitars. Yeaah. Well that's a different thing. Yeaah, one goes out, one has to come in. And it's just like how...


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[Assistant] Don't you dare say you enjoyed it. Don't you dare. Listen, uh, 11 hours ago, Variety magazine, Cineworld's real cinemas to reopen with Godzilla.


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[Assistant] And deals with Warner Brothers. So some of the movie theaters are gonna open up with that. So you'll get your wish.


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[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, those are awesome. Those are pretty awesome. Hey, speaking of YouTubers, uhm, many of you guys are...


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[Assistant] It'd be great if we had, we'd just make up a scandal, but it's not like, it's not crazy, it's just like Duralius has been smuggling illegal apples into the country from, like China.


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[Assistant] We're not pieces of shit, so... We try not to be. I mean, in certain instances, yeaah.


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[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, you won't catch us, yeah, grooming any-


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[Assistant] So, Dereli, it's just, you know, are the apples really worth it, is what I'm asking.


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[Assistant] Are you assuming this my friend? Are you making this assumption?


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[Assistant] Oh, the Disney stuff, yeaah. I thought it was fun. I did, I tried it. Uhm, yeaah, some of those missions are really good. There's one, there's a couple that are like, oh boy, this feels like I'm on a Disney ride, and I wish it would just take me off the ride. We'll cut that out.


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[Assistant] I've also tried, uh, just recently I've tried Fallout 76. Okay. Cause I heard games better jump back in now. The way they do questions in that game is so fucking backwards. It makes zero sense.