[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No way for anyone to live forever, but they want the podcast to go on forever, for the next like hundreds of thousands of years. So what they do is they thaw us out for two hours a week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think nugget is the right term for this as well. It's a nugget.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Stanley Parable is a bit like that too, isn't it? But it's a little bit darker. It's like more psychological, I guess, then.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When do you get to the point in your life where that job is okay to do? Where you decide, you know what, I'm cool with this. Like, I'm not even bored by this anymore. I'm gonna stand here and I'm gonna diligently shush people. I'm never gonna have any ambitions about this. How do you post a job ad for that as well?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You've got kids you're pretty good at shushing already, like you're pretty much shushing all the goddamn time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Gives a shit. You're in a fucking zoo. Who cares? Like fucking just let people take their dumb pictures. You know they're gonna do it anyway. You're just asking for trouble putting up a sign saying don't do something.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're out there and their habitat is under threat because people are stupid and then we put them into a zoo where they are subjected to even more stupid people. Like, what chance do they have? It's crazy. Fucking, fucking people. You're right though, hell is other people. But at the same time,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We don't, we don't fucking make it any easier for ourselves with all these stupid ass rules, like all the time, like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Fucking everybody's gonna do it, aren't they? Like, it's just, it's just human nature. I don't know if that's true. Nobody tells me what to do. I'm gonna take a fucking flash, flash photograph. Like, it fucking happens all the time. Yeah, it is true. Is my audio fucked up? Should we restart? Yeah, you've gone all robot-y. Like a, like a, like a, Rome touristy robot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Westeros has seven kingdoms, and seven hells as well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In general, like, how often do you leave your house? Because I find it, I find it weird that like you're surprised by tourist attractions being garbage and public toilets being substandard as well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, like, ugh, there was no way to predict it as well. I've only had good toilet experiences in Rome, and I'll share one with you right now, are you ready?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is a very memorable experience for me. We were on a train trip across all of Europe.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, and the way that we did it was, we'd pick us, like the next city we went to, we did one city a day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So we go to a major city and then the way that we picked our next city was, what's the furthest away that we could take a train overnight and sleep on the train, arrive in the city like first thing in the morning, spend all day in that city. What an amazing strategy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, so that was the strategy, right? But what happened was, because we were traveling overnight a lot and stuff, uh, we didn't really have a lot of time to like, wash, right? So like, I think in two weeks I took like, two showers, okay?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, I mean, you know, I haven't had a shower for a couple of days. This isn't looking too good. I'm probably not going to be having a shower today, right? But I was really stinky and I was like, fuck, I could really do with having a shower. So we get to the train station in Rome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And we're like, all right, let's look around like for bathroom before we like get going or whatever. See if we can just like, you know, freshen up a bit sort of thing. And then I see like a, like a sign with a shower.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Holy shit, there's showers, like, in the, in the train station.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And there's like a bit of a cue. So we're like, fuck it, let's try it. You know, even if it's super bad, you know, just leave your flip flops on or whatever and just wash under your armpits quickly and then we'll get out of here. It'd be like two seconds sort of thing. So we're standing in this queue and we get to the lady. There's like, there's a lady sitting there and there's like, there's people everywhere dressed up like in, you know, staff clothing or whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, holy shit, like, what the fuck is this place? And she's like, okay, it's like, two euros. We're like, what, fuck, really, two euros? So, so, alright, whatever, two euros.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So this guy, like, takes my bag and leads me down this hallway. I was like, what the fuck?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then he sort of dumps me in this room and there's a toilet and a sink and I was like, okay, perfect. This is great. You know, I'll just wash in the sink and take a shit or whatever and we're out of here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then I look in the corner and there's a fucking like, uh, it was like a wet room. There's like, there's a drain in the corner and there's a shower just like in the middle of the ceiling.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like, oh my god, this is fucking incredible. My own room, this like beautiful shower. I was like going to the bathroom while showering at the same time because the toilet was like part of the wet room and stuff. And there was a sink, I could like brush my teeth and everything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I don't know, but I mean, it opened my eyes, like, if I was homeless.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm pretty sure that one of those guys was the guy that was trying to sell that lady's purse to me that one time. I told- I've definitely told this story. I won't tell it again.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do they still have those stupid dancing Mickey mouses? The ones that like dance to music?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But it's not like a reasonable price for them either. It's like, yeaah, 20 euros. They want a note. And you're like, what?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're like anti-tourist groups though, right? Because they teach you as a tourist never to just idle around somewhere.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Lewis, you went to San Francisco a couple of times and it's, it's, instead of like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man-made stuff is different though, because it's not like, you know, Niagara Falls, yeah, it'll be busy if you want to go on the boat that goes like, right up to it or whatever. But otherwise, it's vast. Like, you could fucking see it from anywhere you want, basically. Like, you could find a spot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How many? Lots. Take a guess. Fucking millions of people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've been to Rome a couple of times, honestly, like I, I think, I, I,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The guy just like sort of surprised me. I was coming out of like the Metro and he just like sort of jumped me and slapped this thing on my wrist and I wasn't ready.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think at some point I definitely stopped visiting big tourist attractions because of all the reasons you've listed. I think it just, in your mind you think, fuck I have to see these places, like they must be important, everybody raves on about them. And you get there and you realize that it's just like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, everybody's doing this, it's taken away all of the interesting bits of it because I hate people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The most, the most fun I've had on, on trips and cities that I've visited and stuff is, is doing like what you said, like getting off the, the beaten track, you know, and just like experiencing, trying to like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Experience like the culture of the city, like, you know, how people sort of live there every day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Rather than going to like big tourist attractions. Yeaah. That's always, you always leave that, you always have that experience. You always leave that experience feeling like, oh, this is great. I really enjoyed myself. You know, it was nice.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I don't think I've ever come away from visiting a big tourist attraction and been like, that was totally worth it. If anything, I've always come away feeling like, fuck, why did I waste my time on this?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And if you go to Europe and take trains around Europe, holy crap, you will see some shit. Train stations seem to be like the universal meeting place for people who like to get high on aerosols.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's a few gaps. There's a 15 year gap here where it says that you sold dancing Mickey Mouse wire? Figurings?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What if it's like Super Mario 2 and it's just a dream. It's all just a dream.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'd love to see the reports on me, like, uh, post-simulation, cause man, I watch a lot of weird porn.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hello everybody. Welcome back to the Triforce Podcast. That's right, I'm here. I'm joined by Pyrin Flacks. Howdy. You don't even remember what number it is, do you? And also, Sips. I don't have any idea. No. 102. It's 102.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You guys have had some little trips away. Yeah. Yeah, I've had a really busy summer. It's been exciting. I've been to, I went to Gamescom, went to Germany. How was Gamescom?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Gamescom was fine. I've been loads of times. I like Gamescom. I like Germany. I like the people. I like Cologne. I've not been to Cologne yet. It's okay. It doesn't seem like, it doesn't seem like a busy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Mega sprawling city too much, it's like kind of fairly condensed in the centre. You know, it's nice, it's got quite a market really, there's lots of nice little shops and stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you just breathe that stuff in and it was like, oh boy. I remember when I was a kid and we were like hanging out in the park, we wanted to be all cool and like adults. So we rolled up some pieces of A4 paper.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just lit the end and breathed in the smoke. It was like that, you know? It was like, it was like that. Just horrid.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What was in the aerosol? Jesus Christ. It just linked Africa. Yea, it was links.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's right. Having a giant posse is a problem because...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You don't trust anyone, even if like no one does like, like tell on you, do you know what I mean? You still don't trust everyone, you know? It's like, once you've whittled your group down to like a small enough gang, you can believe that they'll all like, you know, stand behind you, you know, or whatever. Or at least they won't, they won't like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, like the rules, the unwritten rules just like take shape, you know, whereas if you've got like a big bunch, like 20 guys, like God, there's always going to be that kid who's just like the mommy's boy or has to bring his little brother along or something like that, you know what I mean? It's always going to be like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The fucking snitch. Like that one who will just, you know, is just gonna tell, because he's like the kid of a teacher or something, you know it's gonna get back to them. You know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're tied with that for life. Yeah. Yeah. What could it be? You're never, you're never going to shake that like reputation.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So what did you get up to? What do you mean? I wanna know, were you, were you like actively dad entertaining? Why didn't you like send them to summer camp or something? Cause that's what my parents do. Well, I tell you what.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I think I enjoyed it, like, initially, but I think it got boring, because it was the same old shit day after day. But once they're there, they love it!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think that's what I wanted to do when I was looking at that. Did you want to try and put on dad camp? Like can you imagine if you were like scout leader type material and you just got your shorts on. That's a fucking nightmare, are you crazy? Why the fuck would you do that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright kids, welcome to Dad Camp. Okay, first thing we're gonna do is dig up this, uh, old tree stump in the garden. Do you know what I mean?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, I'm not suggesting you bring in, like, neighbourhood kids. I'm suggesting it's just you, kids, portage, or like, I don't know, do anything. Our own kids? Oh, right. Do you, do you, but do you dream of, like, being like that, that kind of outdoorsy dad? Like, is that a thing that you're keen to do, or is that something you want to avoid at all?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, that's like the kind of thing they did before movies, right? They did like the parlor games. Like I remember my parents used to have this old book, um, full of like parlor games that you could play. And they were, it was, it was one of these kind of dusty old


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Stupid, these like, like sardines and stuff like that, you know, things that, and charades and like, I don't know, just weird little things.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's lots of good games, uh, that you can play these days, um, like Small World's really good, um, stuff like that. Like stuff, like stuff like you said though, Pflux, where everyone is in it till the end. That's the key with a board game. Like, like not to knock people out in the way, because that just sucks.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're gonna be staying over as well, and I'm gonna go home and play Dota. Good luck! Here's two cigars.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That is a glorious power move though, really. It's like someone comes to you with a problem and you say, don't worry, Steve will help you with this problem. And then suddenly, you know, you can just smile and look at them plastically while Steve, who is, Steve is like a dog. That's how Steve's gonna help me, you know, but they've alleviate themselves at the


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel like that is an experience that I've had at events.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's always a load of corporate drones on there and they're all giving you all this exact same shit, you know. That you go, you go and fucking queue up and there's some, you know, asshole in a fucking, looking like a dumbass who looks like just enough of a dumbass and behaves just enough of a dumbass that you could possibly forgive him for cutting in the front of that queue.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's a good, there's a, there's about a 50-50 chance he is a dumbass and that he knows that he can get away with it because he's done it before and so he just sees a cue and he's like, I'm just gonna chance this, you know, and if someone calls me on it I'll just act like a dumbass.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you know, but, but that's a good chance they're not gonna call it. You know, I, I feel like that, that though you, we, we see those people in America, we see those people in the UK, but they, they exist. Like, like this same bureaucracy bullshit exists in our country too. Like I don't think it's more or less bad in China. I think if you're staying in hotels with a corporate sponsor, with people who are terrified of losing their


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm so on board with this actually. I could, I could listen to you like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Rant, mould, you're moulding, that's what you are, all day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To like, give a perspective though, like imagine earlier in that day she'd like been shown a ticket to like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Jesus. I actually get it. Like I used to work in a bar and, you know, not for very long, obviously when I was like 16 or something and I was just, I was just giving people free drinks. I was terrible.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That is, that is, that feeling is very familiar to me as an asthma attack and will be familiar to a lot of people as an asthma attack. Because an asthma attack is very similar, like you feel like you can't breathe and that develops very quickly into a patic attack. They're very similar in the way they, they affect you. You know, you, you feel like


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You feel like you're gonna die. You know, it's very stressful. Um, and a lot of the time, you know, sometimes if it's brought on by something that's not physical, like asthma attacks are brought on by this physical tightening in your chest. And since the medication relieves that, it's a very quick snap out of it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, whereas like I think these, these anxiety attacks, like I definitely have had them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like an animal, it's like an animal thing though. What happens is, like, you are convinced that something is wrong in your mind. Like, it's like the classic thing of if someone gave you, like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, well I think that's time to end the podcast. Thanks guys, thanks for listening. We've got a Patreon, you can support us if you like, you don't have to. Otherwise, see you next time. Peace!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sips. On the road. That's right, I'm in Bristol today for the, for the Triforce Podcast. I've left, I've left my dad dungeon.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, everywhere you go. You always take the weather with you, that's right too. And every rose, every rose has its thorn as well, Lewis.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey listen, listen, somebody on reddit pointed out that at one point we started talking about escape rooms, but then I think Lewis cut us short, as Lewis does. We were about to start talking about them, and Lewis was like, alright, we gotta go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We're only three minutes in boys. We got plenty of time to talk about escape rooms. Anybody got any, anything they want to say about escape rooms? I've been to one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alright, this is your cue now Lewis, loud and clear. Have you ever been to an escape room before and if so what was your


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would, for instance, I wouldn't want to go to like a, uhm, a techno club. Right. I wouldn't want to go to a rave either, actually. Uhm, just I'm at this point in my life now where I could just never go to a rave again and I'd be fine with that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I watched that vampire movie. What we do in the shadows, I watched that. Oh, my wife loves that movie.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It is, it is shitty, like, that it happens, and it should never happen, but for fuck's sake, it happens all the goddamn time it feels like, and why are you fucking leaving your kids near these people at any point? Like, why are you, why would you?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But still, if Michael Jackson phoned me up and is like, hey, does your son want to come hang out? I'd be like, no, Michael. He fucking doesn't. He wants to stay home where I can see him and fucking do shit that I can supervise him doing. You're not his parent, Michael.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm not saying that I'm the best parent, and I'm not saying that blaming the parents excuses what he's done, because there's no excuse for what he's done. I'm saying that it's definitely a mix of things that led to this, and not just simply, here is a weird deranged twisted predator.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, who just had free fucking rain over everybody to mind control them and, and lure their kids into his mansion or whatever. You know what I mean? Like it, there's a lot of people involved.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] These allegations have been going around since the late 80s though. People have known about this and, you know, some people believed it and some people haven't and, you know, this is just like another thing that probably proves that it did happen.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know, it's just been going on for so long that I feel like people are probably just immune to it as well. I think that he'll always just have fans who will just look past that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Train was still going, you know? God, I love gravy. Me too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's probably a pancake pan. No. I bet you anything it's a pancake pan. It is not a pancake pan, sir. Like one of those small crepe ones.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well no, the replacement one was sequined. I think he just couldn't afford another metal glove. Yeah, I'm sure that's why he drew the line. Well, he fucking pumped a lot of money into Neverland.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think Sony bought them all back off of him at a cheaper price when he was like fucking struggling for money.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think his dad was just a real piece of shit, and uhm, I think all of the children grew up, like, totally, like, uh, psychologically mangled as a result.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, but yeaah, but then yeaah, like the rest of the family, you wouldn't have probably ever known anything about had it not been for like, a sex tape, yeaah. Have you seen that sex tape? No, I haven't watched it, no. It's total garbage.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think they went to school together, right? They ran in the same social circles. Paris Hilton. Oh my god.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, but like, she's not like really in the public eye much.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know who he was. People don't turn up to your Twitch chat and say, where's Paris Hilton? Now do they? They say, where's Sips? That'd be interesting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] God yeaah, I'll text her after, I'm kinda busy right now. Just playing Counter-Strike. Source, go, sorry. CS Counter-Strike, go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, the wonderful world of celebrities, huh? Like aren't they all fucking-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm really not, I'm not like, it interests me in the same way like, like, you know, trying to figure out why an ambulance is turned up and why somebody is being put in the back of it sort of thing. I'm interested like- Morbid curiosity. Yes. But yeah, like Flaks said, I'm not a consumer of this stuff. I don't like fucking seek out-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like Hollywood personalities, I'm like normally like, you know, somehow heard of them or like I've seen a tweet with them in or something, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But where, where I really stumble is like when people are talking about like other streamers or YouTubers and stuff, like, like I'll say something and somebody be like, oh fuck, that's like the time XXX Sephiroth did that or something.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're right. What? But like, they talk about them like I should know who they are sort of thing, but like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She's only taken, she took over from the, the other, the other big boy on the block was, uh, was a chap from Hungary called Lazlo Lovis. That's right. I'm, uh, probably related to him in some kind of way. Fairly famous mathematician.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I buy passions with other people as well. That's why I'm on the Triforce Podcast. Being passionate and sharing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What a thing to think about in the shower. Here I am thinking about, like, uh, you know, ponies with, uh, rubber dicks and, uh, on their forehead and stuff, and you're thinking about real stuff like, uh, politics and Trump and swing, swing voters and, uh, middlemen and stuff. It's just too, it's just everywhere.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I was reading a thing about how media and how sort of biased it can be and the things that the media chooses to report on and then chooses to serve to you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, and there's, there's a lot of people who say that, you know, it's like, it's, it's like brainwashing, right? Like they pick and choose. They, they omit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Get like, like tons and tons of upvotes but are very sort of like, like


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And notice what gets like, uh, upvoted and stuff. Yeah. Cause I think you can mute posts by, um, by users and stuff too. So some people are saying like, oh yeah, I've like muted that guy. So I never see his posts now before I'd always fall into the trap of reading his posts, not realizing it was him, but it's like massively upvoted. And it's really easy to then just say like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, but you still need people to like, stock the shelves, you need people to monitor those stations and stuff. I think, I think there's probably, realistically, maybe a little bit less, but not, not necessarily six less people working there because of that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, and then if there's a, if there's a basic, um, like a universal income or something like that, then it just turns into funny money, right? It's just your, it's just your money that you're lending to somebody to then just like buy your shit with again over and over.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What are you more scared of, a robot uprising or like a human uprising? Especially humans nowadays, like most of them are just like fucking mountain dew addled cheeto flake fucking covered, you know, fatso.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What, robots teaching kids? Yeah, I think there'll always be a person involved somehow because like, I think, I think there's the, the teaching side of it, but then like, like, well you've got kids that go to school and you know what, like their peers are like and stuff. Some people don't have


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Being used to do a lot of medicinal things, but like for, for surgeries where it's not, uhm, just a straightforward case of like, if this, do that, if that, do that sort of thing, where you have somebody with a ton of expertise.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Once, once robots take over all of the jobs and stuff and the only thing left for people to do is either host a podcast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or, uh, become a YouTuber or streamer. So all we're doing is either streaming ourselves or watching like other people stream and then have robots serve us like our food and everything else. We'll be like the society that lives on the spaceship on Wall-E. That'll be fun, won't it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That'll be really fun. I'm looking forward to that. We lose all of our bone density and stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] People will definitely do stuff like that. You gotta remember as well, a lot of this stuff comes down to like, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There are definitely places that are still a bit behind everything else and are happy to be there as well. There's no pressing need for them to advance to the point where


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I'm telling you, like, it's crazy to think that that's how the world is gonna be with whoever is...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It could be, it could be a lot better. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm with you. I think it would be great, but I think it's super fucking unrealistic. I hope I'm wrong. We're gonna be dead in 20 years.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But then, later on, you come to appreciate it as just being essential to the experience, right? And this is that episode.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So we should record with TTS voices. So as to say like, oh, the podcast has been taken over by robots. We could try that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Flax and, Flax and Sips and Lewis are just out fucking have, they got all this free time, they're exercising, they're happy, they're growing their own vegetables and stuff. Lewis is having a lovely time today.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I find that I laugh a lot more if I'm in an audience. Like if I go to see a comedian and I'm seeing it live, I'm laughing my ass off.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's obviously a social thing, laughing in a group, you know, you're all sort of saying, hey, we're all on the same side here. And also, I think a big part of laughing is saying, I'm not the butt of this joke.


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[Assistant] I really, I honestly, I really enjoy doing the triforce and chatting to you lads. Cause it's like, an hour of my week.


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[Assistant] I like to think that the Wutang clan would be delighted to hear that, um, other than the, what is it, the 36 chambers or whatever, musely in the 36 cupboards of ships.


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[Assistant] What's that lad called that's got the number 69 tattooed all over him? I hesitate to say his name is Lil69, but I suspect it is. Lil69x.


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[Assistant] Far side, they were a good example. They were just, they were great.


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[Assistant] I mean, I will say, right, like grime, which is big in, big in the UK now, grime is kind of a pro-crime.


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[Assistant] So what you're saying is, the reason I don't get 80,000 viewers is because I'm in the wrong time zone, I'm bad at games.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I'm literally rocking the least fashionable haircut there is.


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[Assistant] Not that people were having them at 15 regularly when we were at New York.


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[Assistant] Hey, talking about robots, that reminded me of something. I don't know why robots reminded me of something. I've been reading about, you know, CERN and the Large Hadron Collider, you know about this? Yeah. So, in case anyone out there doesn't know, the Large Hadron Collider.


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[Assistant] So this is funny because if you Google CERN on, if you look it up on YouTube, I should say.


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[Assistant] I'd say the first 20 or 30 results, there might be one video that's actually related to CERN and the rest are pictures of demons coming out of portals and two hour long videos which you know are going to be amazing of some guy saying


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[Assistant] That's the accelerator. So what they, it's like a huge, I think it's 26 kilometers long and they accelerate these, uh, hadrons up to near the speed of light and then they use magnets to narrow the beam of them so that they're likely to collide and then they run them through these, these pieces of machinery that are able to see


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[Assistant] These collisions, because they're obviously we're talking about at the atomic level, you're trying to catch a snapshot of what happens when these things collide and they're looking for consistencies because that means


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[Assistant] Yeah, I agree. I think, I think the main problem is that there's a group of people out there who if they had their way, if they'd been around say a hundred thousand years ago when we, when we mastered fire, they would have said, we shouldn't mess with this stuff. You know what I mean? Like there's, there's always been that group of people who see any scientific progress.


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[Assistant] Oh my god, what a reference. That was weird because like Keanu Reeves had this, like a lot of these actors, they had like a fallow period where they were like, oh yea Keanu Reeves, yea he did Point Break and that was kind of big and then he started making things like Johnny Mnemonic which was garbage. And then along comes The Matrix and Keanu Reeves is suddenly a superstar again. I think it's really interesting.


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[Assistant] I'm not to say we're smarter, but I think the way we consume television has changed. I mean, think about, I know people will have their opinions about the way Game of Thrones ended. I don't want to get into them. I wasn't happy with it. But anyway, the point is that was a lot of TV and a lot of people had watched it and were invested in it and


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[Assistant] That's unheard of, really, in the past, to have a TV show that runs for that long and is that detailed and has that much sex and violence and complexity, and movies have gone the same way. I mean, you can say what you like about Avengers, but if you look at the superhero movies, and even the action movies in general that were big in the 70s and 80s, there's no friggin' way!


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[Assistant] That any studio would have said, three hours and you want like 15 movies? Yeah, no problem. Like that's, everything's changed. Everything's changed.


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[Assistant] I use Metacritic is what I, I use that quite often as well. Cause that, that's quite good. Uh, that like takes the average of all the reviewers. Right. Uhm, and you can see like the guys from the Christian Gazette didn't like it. So I'm like, oh, this is probably pretty good. You know what I mean? You can find all the different reviews.


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[Assistant] Like, when I watch Arnie movies, I still love them for what they are. Like, The Running Man is objectively a terrible film, but I love it. Because it's just Arnie, he's just very watchable, it's such a stupid movie, and you know, I used to love it when I was like 14 or 15 to watch The Running Man.


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[Assistant] I'll be honest with you, watching Lewis eat that can of corn with burger sauce in, live on stage, when we did, I can't remember, what was it, one of the proper job segments, I was actually gagging. Really? That was, I was gagging.


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[Assistant] There's a website I go to called the worst things for sale and there's a penis attachment that turns your urethra into like the sprinkler on a garden hose. So you put it down your dick hole.


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[Assistant] You just did it again though. How sorry are you? You literally just brought it up again.


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[Assistant] Which circle of hell is this that we're trapped in here?


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[Assistant] Is there an equally, is there an equal hill across the road where there's the lazy people, you know, who, uh, do you know what I mean? And they're just sitting on their boulders forever, like smoking weed, and they're, they're doomed to do that cause they can't be arsed to push the boulder. And they're never gonna change.


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[Assistant] Honestly, like, these things you can be done for anything. Like, you can be done for being like, paying too much attention to your dick and not paying enough attention to your dick. But that's the point.


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[Assistant] You're right, and like, where's the line, and where's who's the moral, where's the book that explains what you should and shouldn't do. I like that, that's interesting though. You smiled at a gay man!


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[Assistant] A million years in hell. It's like, what? Yes, it says that in the bible that you shouldn't be nice to gays, you should tag them. It's like, okay, well, sorry. Whoops. Guess I'm going to hell then. Like, do you know what I mean? Who's the authority of this shit? And it's so out of date so quickly.


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[Assistant] It wouldn't make sense. It is. It's so, it's so, it's so flaky and loose. Like, what's scary is that we just don't know and even, uh, if you, if you try and follow these 2000 year old texts.


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[Assistant] You know, all you're gonna do is scare yourself silly.


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[Assistant] It's weird, isn't it? It's really, it's really interesting to think about, cause there's so many depictions of hell, and you see it in like loads of movies depicted differently. I like the concept though.


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[Assistant] I feel like you shouldn't be just, I mean, first of all, health and safety is, it feels like that should be important for a start. Or hell and safety, I guess. Nooo. But do you know what I mean, like, you can't have someone who's done like, you know, you can't have like someone who's done something really small, like I don't know, accidentally. That was my point.


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[Assistant] Who would try to redeem themselves to help other people redeem. Do you know what it's like? It's like...


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[Assistant] But here's the thing, all of that stuff doesn't make any sense, right? None of it does, because people are dynamically changing and constantly evolving, unless you somehow, you're, when you die, you're like locked in a specific


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[Assistant] Sense of mind, like, for example, even with like physical torture, okay, if you're being like flame-grilled on a fucking, you know, barbecue, on a spit roast every day and like rotated around like a roast pig,


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[Assistant] After a few days, your brain is going to have adapted to that, and you know, even if you're continually healed or through magic, it's a bullshit. You know, ugh, it's stupid. The point is that there's other tortures that are necessary to have. Like mental torture.


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[Assistant] But also the same thing with, with, with heaven. Like, you know, you do smoke and...


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[Assistant] It's the idea here is that, you know, that these people are sent to heaven, but it's not their heaven really, and it doesn't feel like heaven to them, you know. It's clever. Yeah, you should watch it. It's funny and it's good and it plays with that.


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[Assistant] Heaven, hell kind of concept, you know, there's this idea that they're, they're in a good place.


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[Assistant] Oh my gosh. Well, there he goes. Glowing accolade for that. Holy crap. So one thing I, I, I saw this week, um, on Twitter was this, this post that was going around and it was basically the thing about aphantasia. Um, which is that way you can't


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[Assistant] Yeah, it's where you can't visualise, um, images or things in your head.


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[Assistant] Something I'd sort of never heard of really, and it was something that we've never really even acknowledged. You know, when we were kids or when we were at school, people were like, oh yeah, this guy's dyslexic or, you know, this guy's autistic or this guy's, you know, but aphantasia is this thing where you don't have, um,


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[Assistant] It's not like you don't have an imagination necessarily, but it's like you don't, you can't visualize images. And you know, I think it is this for a second, you know, I was like, cause the way the sort of the scale was presented was it was presented as like, you can visualize a beautiful red, crisp, vivid apple.


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[Assistant] So if I were to tell you like, can you imagine an apple in your mind right now, what does that look like? And it sort of had this scale and it was like the next one was a little bit kind of fuzzy, the next one was like black and white, the next one was like kind of just a blur.


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[Assistant] Yeah, and talking to certain people about it afterwards, and reading some stuff about it, it feels like it's something to do, it's not, people aren't always the same on the scale, but it doesn't actually matter, you can improve on the scale.


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[Assistant] But some people obviously don't have a mind's eye and that is a sort of a thing with their brain. Uhm, but it's not.


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[Assistant] I'm not sure, like, I'm not sure if it's like one of those things which actually helps you in some ways or, you know, in some things and hurts you in others, you know.


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[Assistant] And it doesn't seem to be that big of a deal, um, but it was strange because Neil Gaiman, um, who's the famous, you know, writer and guy who mostly, honestly, Neil Gaiman, I used to really enjoy his writing, but it's sort of recently sort of become a bit more, oh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I went outside into my garden and at the bottom was the fairy cottage and I spoke to the fairy queen and she told me to go climb the beanstalk.


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[Assistant] And someone responded to him saying, we get it Neil, you have like an amazing imagination, you know. And he sort of responded saying, oh I didn't realise anyone didn't. I thought everyone was number one like me, you know. I thought we were just going to post, you know, what we imagined out of our imagination. But a lot of people have trouble apparently.


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[Assistant] Seeing things in their mind's eye, or when they close their eyes or when their eyes are open. And I was wondering if, if, what, what, for, for you too, what it was like, because for me,


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[Assistant] Uhm, it's not easy to imagine things in my mind. And I certainly can't, it certainly doesn't seem to me to be a vivid or like, like real seeing. It certainly is, is, is blurrier.


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[Assistant] Uhm, so for example, a test I can, like one of the tests that it sort of says is, imagine someone that you know, okay, uhm, not well, that maybe you haven't, or quite well, but maybe you haven't seen them for a little while. So maybe like if we imagine each other, can you see my face like floating in your mind's eye as I'm talking to you?


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[Assistant] So that's the other thing, isn't it, that you can smell and hear and sort of taste things. Like imagine, if you imagine like right now a lovely soft piece of bread, you know, can you like taste that little bit in your mouth?


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[Assistant] As humans we don't use our sense of smell that much, do we really?


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[Assistant] But it is designed to. The smell of puke is designed to make you puke. But if someone else has puked, the whole point of a tribe is that it will save the tribe. You shun them and leave them for the wolves. No, because if they've eaten something which is making them sick, you should also be sick.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, so, so this is a fantastic thing. I just may be interested. I think the reality is that people are on different sides of the scale. Um, definitely. And I know it is something that you shouldn't be worried about if it's harder for you to visualize things and certainly, well, cause I was concerned about.


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[Assistant] So I find it much harder to visualize things or to manipulate images in my mind. Uhm, and some people just, it's very easy, it's very real, it's very vivid. Well most people I think actually. And so, apparently you can improve it by practice and it doesn't impact your life too much. But if you can't see anything, so there was this guy, this guy Ed.


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[Assistant] Uh, who was the head of Pixar, Ed Catmull, and he was doing some


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[Assistant] Tibetan meditation, which, which is part of that is a visualization. And he was told as part of the practice to picture a sphere, you know, floating in front of him and he just couldn't, couldn't do it for like a week. And so he found out that, you know, lots of people.


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[Assistant] Maybe, maybe. So Martin mentioned that he was, Martin Littlewood said he was like a five on the scale, or whatever like a sort of, whatever it is, whatever the one where not able to sort of visualise things is, and that's unusual.


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[Assistant] Yeah, never trust a five. Never. He's quite artistic, you know, and obviously got started sort of building things in Minecraft. And I don't know, like maybe that, that desire to build and create and show things in that thing comes out from there. I don't know. He's a, he's a creative guy though. And it's certainly not.


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[Assistant] It is impressive how music and things like this do cause, uh, uh, sometimes a reaction.


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[Assistant] I've done many times. Last week I was in Sipsys Kitchen and we were playing, I said Alexa played Toto by Africa.


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[Assistant] We were all bopping out, you know, just fine, but Sips' daughter was not having it. She was not enjoying it at all.


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[Assistant] It's like a single player battle brothers, only you can only save at the end. Right. Um, and so you're kind of, you're kind of, you have your mercenary.


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[Assistant] And so I started the game, I created my character, I went to the studio, blah blah blah, I did it all, it was fine, and then got into the game, created a character, walked out of town, there were two wolves there, they just savaged me to death!


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[Assistant] Like, games are weird, and they try and do weird stuff too, like sometimes they're like,


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[Assistant] Sometimes they're like a movie, like a, like they've got a full story and it feels like just a bad movie and it's like a bad slow movie, you know. And sometimes it's like a puzzle thing and it's like, it's like a complicated sudoku or like,


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[Assistant] Sometimes it's a mix of those things, sometimes it's like just a mindless shooty or a clicky thing. I played a little bit of like, uhm...


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[Assistant] Wolchen, which is like a new kind of Diablo type game.


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[Assistant] And it felt like it was like the new evolution of Diablo and I enjoyed it, but like at the same time, it was like just a little bit.


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[Assistant] Uhm, there's loads of good recommendations out there. So I would, if you're looking for any games, just look at some best of 2019 lists and best of the decade, because there's been some really interesting games and you probably would have missed one. And I'm doing the same with books and stuff.


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[Assistant] You should go on the podcast. Alex and the game devs in the office have made a new podcast. I think it's called like Pitch Perfect. They're bringing people in to pitch their games and the game devs talk about whether the game would be possible or not to make and what the downsides would be. If you're interested in that, we just plug in another podcast. That's unbelievable.


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[Assistant] So, uh, by the way, Oscars happened, um, Parasite won. Great movie. Have you seen Parasite? No, I haven't seen it. People keep telling me I should see it. It's come out at the cinema this week, um, and I watched it, and I thought it was pretty weird.


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[Assistant] It feels so stereotypical, yeaah, like hokey kind of.


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[Assistant] Gene Siskel of the Chicago Tribute gave it two and a half stars, calling it a stunt and not a story. A technical achievement more can say with special effects than with actual people. Our attitude towards the film's cardboard characters is, let em burn.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, there was a bunch of this, there's a bunch of these, I mean that, that sounds like Titanic was inspired by some of that, you know, luxury line of flipping over.


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[Assistant] Yeah, but like in the same way, like I feel like I've seen these things about building on fire.


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[Assistant] You know, airport is like, you know, like die hard happening or speed. You know, these disaster movies, I feel like, I feel like over my lifetime I've seen a movie set in an airport, in a building, in a plane, in a boat.


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[Assistant] It's a good, it's a very good movie. I mean, if you read it to the story of how the abyss got made, we might have even talked about it on this podcast, but it was like a fucking, it was a disaster.


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[Assistant] Anyway, there you go, that's a bit of trifles podcast.


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[Assistant] Okay, check this, check this segue, check this transition. The box set that I've been putting off, okay?


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[Assistant] Right? I started watching it and man, I'm loving it. I started watching The Toys That Made Us, the uh, the docu-series on Netflix. Really? I didn't watch it. It's really, really good. I like, I put off watching cause I just thought, ah, fuck, you know, I, I,


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[Assistant] The first season was great. They did, uh, the Star Wars toys by Kenner, you know, like the original ones. The story's really interesting. They did He-Man, which was really interesting. And they did GI Joe, you know, like the fully articulated three quarter, yeah, I had tons of them too.


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[Assistant] Really interesting and Barbie as well, which is, uh, super interesting too. There's four episodes in the first season.


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[Assistant] The focus is more on sort of like North American culture though in the 80s from what I've noticed. You know what I mean?


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[Assistant] They still make Malibu Barbies now, because it's that sort of valley girl, you know, sun-kissed skin with, you know, blonde hair and stuff, and it's like, almost became like a template for, I dunno, like American women or something.


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[Assistant] Well no, it came, I think it came out in like the, in the 60s or the 70s. Really? Malibu Barbie? Like the big seller?


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[Assistant] Barbie in the 80s was big and then slumped and then Barbie in the 90s was big and then slumped. It's, it's been around for a long time. So it's not. 1971. It feels like it's been consistently.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think back, I think, I think early on back in the days, it was like you had to convince mothers before children.


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[Assistant] The, uh, the guy who originally designed her was a, he used to design missiles for the US military.


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[Assistant] And then, uh, so, and then Mattel scoop him up, cause he was like a, you know, like an industrial engineer or whatever. And he starts drawing up, uh, he, he like, he invented, you know, like the, the fucking knee snapping thing that, you know, when you bend Barbie's legs and you hear that snapping thing, like he, he, he,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You patented and invented that. Genius. All the ways that she moves and her shape and everything.


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[Assistant] Yeah, well, I think he was, he was fairly wealthy. Like at the time they couldn't afford to pay him the salary that he was getting paid designing missiles.


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[Assistant] So they brought him in on a lower salary, but they gave him like a 1.5% royalties of anything that he designed for Barbie, uh, which made him like a millionaire overnight. Basically it was like this insane deal for him.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah, I'd imagine that it was somewhat like that, but they had this period where at Mattel, the founder of Mattel was a woman and her husband, but she was like the big cheese, and she got caught up in a big scandal where she was like cooking the books.


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[Assistant] Uh, because things weren't like going super well at Mattel at, at, after a certain point. This is despite having Barbies.


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[Assistant] I'm sure she did. Yeah. But anyway, she was ousted. She was, she was fine. She was ousted from the company. She had to do community service and stuff. And then there was a period where.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, it was just a bunch of, bunch of, you know, old crusty corporate guys that took over Mattel, so they were- Yeah, yeah, so they were running Barbie, and one of the, one of the Barbie lines that came out at that time-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was always, it was always a hard sell to men because when men saw a Barbie doll and they saw her breasts, they immediately just thought about sex. They humped it. Right? But like when a woman saw a Barbie doll and, or like a child saw a Barbie doll, like they didn't think on those terms, obviously sort of thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So, so these guys all take over the Barbie franchise and they're responsible for, you know, creating these new lines and keeping the company afloat or whatever. And one of the Barbies that came out around this time was you could like, you could turn her arm all the way around and in doing so it would like inflate or deflate her tits. So you could like, she, she could become like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, and it just totally flopped like all these, all these mums like going to the store and seeing this and being mortified. Nobody bought it for their kids and stuff. How do you even advertise that? Some of the stories are super fucking funny.


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[Assistant] This is another thing like, cause my wife has been sorta half watching it in the background while I'm, while I'm watching it. And, uh, she's interested enough, but because it is so North American focused.


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[Assistant] Like even with Barbie, she had a couple of Barbies, but she had Cindy's, right? Like, like that was the big thing in the UK. So some of it, she was like, oh yeah, whatever. But like it didn't really apply. Same with GI Joe's. Like GI Joe's just didn't make it over here. It was, you know, it was like the Barbie sized action men that were still popular at the time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's, yeah, I know it's, I guess nowadays, you won't get that so much nowadays because a lot of these shows that are watched in the West, for example, you know, people are watching them on like Netflix or whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Holy shit is there ever, yeaah. And like, uh, my daughter's into My Little Pony now, which is just...


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[Assistant] It's just, it's just everything. It's almost like they make a movie and like frame for frame you can find a new toy in there. You know what I mean? There's just like everything. One new character is introduced, they can make like 12 variations of a toy for them and stuff. It's insane.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think Star Wars was one of the first that, that did that sort of thing where it released basically the same toy over and over again, just in different variations. Like they had like miniature versions or they had like whatever, you know, they had like these different sets.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, finally, it's funny he realized that, but they had the worst deal. What, like the story behind Star Wars and the toys, they ended up signing with, uh, Kenner. Remember Kenner, the toy company Kenner?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is just like a small ass toy company in Cincinnati that had no really big lines of toys or whatever, you know, they were just, they were just doing what they, they could to get by sort of thing. And then they landed the, the, the rights to Star Wars because


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] When Star Wars was coming out and being filmed, everybody just thought it was going to be a huge flop. Even George Lucas thought it was going to be a huge flop. Like if you ever read about the story of Star Wars.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So no toy companies wanted to touch it. They were just not interested. Uhm, and then Kenner comes along and says, yeah, yeah, we'll take it. But the deal that they made was like, it was crazy. It was like for every sale, like I think George Lucas got like 2.5 cents on the, on, on a say on a dollar.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Fox got 2.5 cents on a dollar and then the rest went to Kenner. So they just had this like insane deal and they just made millions. Like it was just, it was absolutely nuts.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, so what they did, they didn't have the toys ready in time for Christmas when the movie came out, and nobody expected the movie to be as big as it was.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And when Christmas came around, they had no physical toys to sell, but what they did was they sold this piece of paper that had a picture of all the figures.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It happens a lot with toys though, like if you watch this documentary, you'll see that a lot of the big, like the final play for like a lot of these toys, cause like there's definitely a shelf life for them as well. The G.I. Joe toys, I remember them dominating my childhood, they were only popular for like four or five years, and they were just gone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like the He-Man toys were the same. It was like, the first year sales, they couldn't have imagined it. They were just like, what?


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[Assistant] They thought, they thought they would make maybe a million. They ended up making like seven million in their first year. So they were pretty happy. But then like second year was like, um, fucking some crazy, like 30 million.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's it. I mean, like the next generation of kids isn't going to be interested in what the previous generation played with, right? Because there'll be something new. Like, I remember He-Man sort of like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not necessarily dying out because I loved it. I used to watch the show and everything. But as I got older, I remember


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I remember getting into GI Joes and that was just like, okay, I'm playing with GI Joes now. And then after GI Joes, I got more into like constructs and Lego and stuff. You know what I mean? Like, I think that's a fairly natural path for a child and playing with toys sort of thing.


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[Assistant] Yeah, they keep coming back. Man, they keep coming out. There's like a new series that just came out. My son's buying them. Like we went to, there was like a local comic convention here last weekend and he, he just, we went and he bought a bunch of Pokemon cards. It was just like, what? Like the latest series or he doesn't even play Pokemon. He just collects them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's funny, like it, I guess it teaches them a bit about like economy and money and stuff like that. Like, cause at first he was just trading stuff.


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[Assistant] It's funny how these uhm, how these little factions form at school though, cause even my son who's eight and in year three,


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[Assistant] There's like four or five guys at his school who are, I guess their dads are really into football and as a result they're really into football or whatever. But man, these kids have like all the jerseys and they trade cards and they play football at lunch and stuff and it's like, it's insane.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I know, but maybe, maybe he, maybe he should try it out. Maybe he'll find that he's actually good at that. You know, it's a different set of skills.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Tell your friends, you know, to watch, there's a whole bunch of really, um, good YouTube documentaries on, um, on famous basketballers like Kobe Bryant, like Michael Jordan and stuff. And I'm sure this exists for all types of sportsmen or whatever. Not only do you have to play a lot and practice a lot,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's like a lot of psychology in it too, right? Like there's some, I watched some really interesting videos recently about Kobe Bryant and like how he would like approach


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[Assistant] You know, like matches against, you know, people he thought were like really tough competition for him sort of thing. Because like if, if, if they're paired up against each other on opposing teams or whatever, there's a chance that they can't score as many points as they normally would for their team. Right. And then they, they could lose as a result.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So he had to like study his, his, his enemies a lot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, to see what kind of stuff they would do, what sort of positioning they would use and stuff so that he could, uhm, you know, foil them, uh, and prevent them from scoring points and stuff. And he was like really good at it, but...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A couple of times when he wasn't so good at it and was frustrated with it, he went away and just like worked even harder to like study them and everything and then would come back and get results and stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe it's the same with this football kid. Maybe he's just got to go off and not only does he have to do the physical, but you got to do the mental as well.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, you might not get the dunks, but you can still get the shots. You might be good at throwing three pointers or whatever, like, you know, everybody's got that, but I think you, I think you just got to keep working at it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay. And they play like every day. If he loves it, he has to keep trying because some people naturally will just gravitate towards it and be better at it to begin with.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, some people just take longer to get good, but with enough practice, he can get good. Like, it's not, he's not doomed to never be good at it.


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[Assistant] Toys, historically, uhm, weren't made against movies. And only few movies have pulled off successful toy ranges. And the reason is because movies


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I think what's happening now is a lot of toys are coming out off the back of video games. I think that's a big toy seller now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It fits in perfectly with collecting and shit like that. Yeaah. So video games I think are huge toy sellers.


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[Assistant] There's loads of Fortnite toys. You've seen those in the toy store?


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[Assistant] Five Nights at Freddy's, which isn't even really for kids at all.


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[Assistant] Nobody dies in G.I. Joe. Their plane explodes and they parachute out. Everybody parachutes to safety in G.I. Joe. That's the running sort of like meme of G.I. Joe. Even if they're on the ground.


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[Assistant] You might get scuffed up a bit, but nobody ever died in Jeju.


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[Assistant] The big news now is that there's a lot of cases in Italy. There's like 500 cases in Italy. And countries are warning their citizens not to travel to Italy because they don't seem to be able to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, riddle me this, San Francisco has, the city of San Francisco has declared a state of emergency and there's zero confirmed cases of the coronavirus in San Francisco.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Laugh it up. Laugh it up. On your own. Have you guys played any video games recently? I'm in a rut. I haven't been able to find anything that I want to play. I stopped playing Overwatch, which is a good first step.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I played it last night, I got it. I played it last night. What did you think? I like it, I like the idea of it, I like, it's tense, but it's so uhm,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wish you just had a compass on the HUD so that you could call out where stuff is instead of having to be super descriptive.


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[Assistant] He's behind the blue container to the right of where you are, not where I am. Like it just takes- Yes. It's a clusterfuck of uh, playing with a team is impossible. It's very difficult. I feel like maybe playing solo would be a little bit easier.


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[Assistant] Yeah, some of those keys are worth like hundreds of thousands of rubles and stuff, eh?


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[Assistant] I just want to survive one round. I played three games last night and I did okay, like surviving and stuff. And then right at the end, just like everybody's like, okay, go to the distraction thing. Where are you guys? I've lost you. I'm dead. Like I just, somebody just fucking shot me on a train track.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's, it's such a neat idea for a game though, I really like it. And it is tense. It's like...


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[Assistant] It's like playing Rust without having to worry about gathering resources and setting up a base and stuff like that, right? It's just the PvP, but it's simulated very well, isn't it? Like the damage, the gun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Even, even just like loading up magazines, like keeping track of how many bullets you have and stuff, like you, you could find yourself in a situation where you're like, fuck, I have no ammo. I'm almost dead. I really need to extract. Like it's.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It is really well done. It's a really neat idea. I can see why it's so popular too because I think it's...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, instead of having a circle that, that, that sort of shrinks around you, you're, you're limited by time. You have half an hour. So like you have to extract within half an hour. So you have limited time to run around on the map.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So it's like, it's not like this thing that you can just spend a lot of time meticulously doing, you know? It's just, it's something you have to sort of think about and plan.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kind of, you know, it's kind of like with BRZ, you sort of have to react to this circle closing, but you know, with this, you have to sort of be mindful of the timer and stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You have a hideout that you can, um, upgrade. You can upgrade the hideout. Yeaah, you can find parts for your hideout out on, you know, in these missions. Bring them back and upgrade your hideout which give you like passive bonuses and stuff.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh man, there's six vendors and they all sell this random assortment of magazines, ammo, weapons and stuff. It's like, I bought a gun yesterday and it took me like an hour to find the, the, the vendor that actually sells the magazine for this thing and then load the bullets into it and stuff.


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[Assistant] I was questioning this the other day as paid DLC, uhm, and like a lot of people pointed out, I was playing Farmer's Dynasty at the time, which I paid like 20 bucks for, and like, you know, so they were saying like, how could you question that when you paid money for like this crappy game, or whatever, and that's a fair point, but,


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[Assistant] With RimWorld and the amount of mods that are out, it feels like, hasn't somebody already modded that? Like, or did they just take a really good mod and then charge for it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I'm just, I'm just, I'm not criticizing, I'm just curious as to how they found something that wasn't modded or, you know what I mean? Like, I will definitely get it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't mind supporting them, but it just, it seems crazy that a mod doesn't already exist for that, or did they just take it, a mod and polish it up?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I got a weed mod for Rimworld that had like all this broken ass stuff in it, but it was well done. It was cool. You could grow weed and like harvest the weed and stuff, but then you could make like weed armor and stuff that sold for a lot of money, which was in itself kind of broken. And I think.


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[Assistant] Another thing you have to be careful of when you get a mod in RimWorld is, depending on what it sort of contributes back to your colony,


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[Assistant] I was just surprised that DLC came out so long after the game has been released and there wasn't already like a mod in existence that kind of did that. And maybe there is, but at the same time I don't begrudge paying more money for a game that I've gotten, you know, 10 times the value out of it.


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[Assistant] I played, uh, I played that stone shard for a bit yesterday, which I, overall I liked. I liked the look of it. It's hard as balls. Yeah, it's, it's hard, but it feels bullshit hard and not like...


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[Assistant] And then I was resting and I was really low on health after that fight and some dude just came in from like four rooms away and attacked me. And it's just like, okay.


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[Assistant] There's a lot to like in Stone Shard though, I don't want, I don't want like people to think that I just, I hate it just because of that, but it was enough to get me to stop playing it, I just thought, I'm not wasting my time on a game that's just gonna do this, like it's not.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't mind a game throwing curveballs at you once in a while too. Like, you know, if you eat some berries that you found because you're hungry and you get poisoned, but there's some.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Reasonable way to get around that, where it's not just like, haha, you're dead now. You know, it's like, it's like going back to Sierra Adventure games, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh oh, you shouldn't have pressed the one key randomly. You're dead, I hope you saved, you know, like it's just, I don't know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it had the cartoons, right? They were in arcades. Yeah, I think it was Ralph Bakshi. Dragon's Lair, yeah.


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[Assistant] It's, it, I, I, I feel like there's, there's clever ways of making something difficult, like where you, you either need like skills, like you need to practice to get better at it, or whatever.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But there's some really just bullshitty things that happen where people are just like, oh, it's really hard, but it's like, no, it's not hard. It's just badly designed. Like it's, you know what I mean? Like there's a way better way of doing this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sure, but the thing is, like, in a game like that, in a platformer like Mario, the average time it takes to complete a level is like a minute or two minutes or whatever. There's even a timer on the top of the screen, right? So if you miss a platform and die, okay, cool, I'll retry it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then you die and then, and then you have to restart, but it's not like a, there's no satisfaction to it whatsoever. You just have to redo two hours of the same shit to get back to that point.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I think that's why games like XCOM and maybe Battle Brothers works because it's not, it's not just you and one character, it's, it's...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The over arcane game is you're managing a squad, a roster with like a backbench and stuff like that. So in XCOM doing an Ironman run, it's a little bit different because you might lose your best guy, but then it makes things interesting or it can make things


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Somebody else has a chance to shine and it's interesting and it's like, okay, cool. You know what I mean? But like in a game where you control one character, like I guess like, I'm not a big Dark Souls fan either. And I guess there's, you know, a lot of people love these like really difficult games where you have to like learn patterns and these big boss fights and stuff.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I haven't, like any of those games that I've played, I haven't really enjoyed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you should, you should get a Malibu Barbie flag. That's what you should be doing. I would love to, you know. Get some GI Joes. Man, I wish I didn't sell, I sold all my GI Joes at a garage sale when I was in my teens. I needed money for smokes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you'd had your whole collection of Action Men or G.I. Joe's or whatever preserved throughout those years and you find yourself like in your forties and like being nostalgic and looking back, you could have been that guy that just has a room in his house devoted to like your shrine to, you know, childhood toys or whatever.


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[Assistant] I'm glad that I've sold all my toys and now I don't have that attachment to stuff like as an adult, you know, like material things I'm not overly attached to and I think that's because as a kid,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] While you were busy prancing around, collecting mounts, and raising your reputation with the bronze dragonflight, you know what Ben was doing? That's right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He was playing Starfleet Battles the whole fucking time. He learned all the rules, he learned all the moves, this guy has got the moves, he's got the, he's got the razzle dazzle, he can bust it out any time he wants! I guarantee you he doesn't. Nah, he probably doesn't, you're right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Holy crap, that's come along really quick and then TwitchCon is just around the corner too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, but does that mean if I fly from Italy to London and then get on a connecting flight, are they gonna stop me?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Only God can control this sort of stuff. It's silly to think that any measures we bring in would do it. I think this is ridiculous. It's all in the hands of God. And trust me, he loves us, so it's gonna be fine. And then subsequently gives, uh, the, uh, the speech while sweating heavily under the effects of coronavirus.


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[Assistant] Mrs. F said let's go to Costco and buy some backup supplies just in case. And one of the things she wanted to buy was toilet paper. So I have.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A Brexit-proof pile of toilet paper, and it just happens to come in handy, I suppose, for the corona stockpiling. I don't know, she said to me, why did I think toilet paper was going to be a thing after Brexit? I said, I don't know, I don't know, love.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, there is no shortage. There never was. But it's one of those things we were talking about, like, uh, you know, panic causes panic causes panic. And if you hear that there's a shortage, there is a shortage. What's the next? It is not our job. It is not our job to put the seed in someone's mind. Like if we mentioned a product,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, think of the stupidest, stupidest, I mean, I know what Sips is gonna say, he'd normally say dildos, right? So let's say there's a massive dildo shortage coming up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I feel the opposite. When I'm really hungover or when I'm not feeling very well, I get really horny. I think it's because my body is saying, this might be the end of us. We might be about to die. You better procreate fast, buddy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, do you guys remember, this is, this is, this is, this is grim, right? But do you remember, here, have you, or have you heard this story?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] For a while in sort of the, uh, some parts of sub-Saharan Africa, they believed some of the sort of, I don't know what you call them, shaman or the kind of local medicine kind of guy, not a doctor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, they said that the cure for AIDS was you had to fuck a baby. No, no, no, it was fucking.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right, but the only go-to guaranteed virgin was a baby, so a lot of babies are getting


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The only way that this story came up is someone walked in on this witch doctor, fucking a baby, and he was like, what are you doing? You're fucking a baby, because no, this- It's okay, I have AIDS.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She gets in her van, she goes off with a bunch of other dogs, they go to like different parks all around southwest London and slightly further out. She drives in there, they all walk, she sends me videos.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, so, and she does that, you know, she goes every day, she socializes with the other dogs, so she's getting, cause I mean, you know, I don't have any friends in the area that have dogs, like I know other people in the area that have dogs, but not like friends' friends that I'd meet up with often, they're people I might see. I can take it to the park and stuff like that, but then,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, I don't want to go too far away from home because I might get a call from school and also I want to be able to stream and do podcasts and everything. So I'm like, you know, I'll get a dog walker. So the dog gets a ton of exercise and socializes with other dogs, which is really important. So yeah, I thought it was good. Go ahead and criticize.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, dogs are, you know, by their nature, they're active creatures. They're not like cats. They do sleep a lot, but they also need to be stimulated. And it's just, it's good for them to socialize with other animals. It's good for them to socialize with other people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Agnes is an absolute sweetheart. She is such a nice dog.


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[Assistant] And everybody that she meets, she's like, you're great. You know what I mean? She wants to be nice to them and pet them and sort of hang around with them and lick them and stuff. She's very, very friendly. And she's the same with other dogs, because she's always been so close with other dogs and she's used to other dogs. And it's just very good. And I mean, you know, she's got a tiny little life to lead and a little brain and everything. I want to make sure she's happy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, um, she seems very contented. I think getting on these walks is really good for her and it makes me happy that, you know, I'm not gonna take her for a two and a half hour walk every day, but the dog walker does. And, uh, it's working out great and the dog walker's fantastic and Aggie loves her. Nice.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We found the, here's a tip dog owners, here's a tip for you that was given to Mrs. F by a friend. This is the best cheap dog toy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, I was wondering about the effect that weather has, weather must have an effect on people culturally. And I was thinking, if you think about the average British person, they're generally pretty optimistic, I'd say. We're kind of like, you know, our mood is pretty steady because we're just used to the oppressive grey cloud.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, we are blunt, we're blunt, but the thing is, if it's raining today, raining now, 10 minutes, it'll be fine. That's a very British attitude to things. I think that's quite an optimistic way of looking at things is don't worry too much.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, it may be bad now, but it'll be alright soon. Because it is. Our weather, it doesn't rain all day in Britain bad often. Whereas you go to other countries, if it starts raining in the morning, you're fucked. That's it. It's not going to stop all day. This weather is here to stay. Whereas in Britain, it's like, oh yeah, this huge rainstorm will go,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Also, there's nice rain and there's bad rain. I'm so glad we're turning the corner. Like, I like dramatic rain. Like, shhh, like a huge downpouring and everything's going nuts. I like that. But I don't like the all-day drippy, off-and-on grey skies.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was reading this the other day. It's the world's littlest skyscraper. Have you heard about this?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And this building is basically this con artist.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So it would have been 150 meters or so, and then it was 12 meters when he finished it. And there was no staircase. They had, they, he, after he built it, they'd said to these, this elevator company would need elevators for this. And when they saw it finished, they were like, obviously we're not going to need elevators now. There's just a ladder to get up and down. It's now like a historic building.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, but it was very embarrassing at the time, but I think that's a great story. That this guy said, yeah, four hundred and eight feet! That's why you gotta look at the plants.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, it was declared legal. It was 1919, so you never know, you know, the Wild West had finished, but they took it to court and the judge was like, look, it says on the plans, it says, you know, 480 inches, you should have read them. So it's like a, yeah, kind of, kind of misrepresentation, but I guess, I don't know if nowadays that would apply.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Back when labor was very cheap, steel was very cheap, land was very cheap. If you're gonna build a skyscraper, you're gonna have to build it somewhere like in a major city. So you're gonna have to buy the land, which is gonna cost you a fucking fortune.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just figured like, the length of time that it takes to build, all the safety stuff, all the wiring, the foundations, I mean they take years to build, how can it just cost 300 million pounds for something like that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know. I mean, I've been thinking for a while, it would, it would depend if we changed the way we approach medicine to maybe not be so precious about things like stem cells, for example, right? Which is like a big thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, I think there's a lot of morality, especially from the religious right in America, bound up in a lot of the things that we could be doing that would advance medicine a great deal. There's a lot of fear around it. Yeah, I think there's a lot of problems with it. There are a lot of moral questions, to be honest. Sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, not 20 year old, but let's say that you could have regular treatments of stem cells or some related technology. I'm not gonna say I understand the fucking details, so some nerd on Reddit can say whoop.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All I know is the words stem cells, and I know that there's some kind of rejuvenative process there, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Repairing itself, that's what aging is. Is that you, you know, when you're young, you get a cut and it heals no problem, your skin snaps straight back, everything's all...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But oddly enough, although me being seven or me being at school seems like an incredibly long time ago-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's, it's infuriating. But once we're over this hurdle, you know, it'll be fine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My oldest just wants to play Minecraft and Undertale and there's a couple of other games she plays. And then my youngest wants to play games and watch videos on the iPad. Like that's, they love it. They absolutely love it. And I mean, I can't criticize it because when I was their age, I did the same thing. I just wanted to play games all the time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She goes to their house, they play games. That's it. I mean, in terms of quality time when they're older, I'd love to... I'm looking forward to going to the pub with my kids. I'm looking forward to going to a gig with them, like taking them to their first gig or something like that would be really hype. Uhm, yeaah, there's all kinds of things I'd love to do with them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's gonna be cool. I'm really interested to see what they're gonna be like when they're adults. Like, what are they gonna be like? You know? What are they gonna do when they're like?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The mushroom people have to live, so there's wet markets, there's a wet market in mushroom kingdom stacked high with koopas and kappas and whatever the hell they're called. All the dead Bowser's and you could just buy them and fucking turn them into Chinese food.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, so here's the thing, I joined the- I joined the channel this morning before we started recording and Lewis said, tell me about this talk-off, I think I might need you to teach me how to play. And I said that we were gonna tell you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But the conversation, the conversation that me and Sips have on the regular when people say, you should get Lewis to play this, we both say the same thing, which is, I don't think Lewis would like this game.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because I know you. I know you. And you would be furious with getting shot and not seeing where it was coming from. Losing your loot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The, the, it's, it's a complicated game. Yeah. That requires patience. Yeah. And I just don't see you having the patience for it, in all honesty.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just, I know you, I know you. It requires a lot of...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Grinding and effort and you die a lot and sometimes you think it feels like bullshit and I just, I personally don't think you have the patience or the stamina.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's always naked, eh? There's always a sexual slant to this stuff. I'm sorry.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is a topical joke because the one and the only, uhm, Chuckles, Prince Charles has contracted the coronavirus. He has it. And he held audience with the Queen.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Just a couple of weeks ago, and she's old, and he's old too. They're like the, like the target demographic for the virus to- They eat very well though.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He hasn't had any, any, he says he feels fine, he hasn't had any symptoms, but you know, things get worse.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, well, you know what? It might be a social distancing, uhm, postman. Because they're, they're out, they're out there. They got their masks, they got the two meter rule. Yeah. Uhm, my postman delivered some stuff to me the other day and just left it on the hood of my car. And shouted at me from outside, I'm just gonna leave it on the hood of your car!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay, thanks very much. That was good. I wish they were like that all the time, honestly. Like, I don't think they need to come right up to my, my door or talk to me ever or whatever. Honestly, I think this, I think the social distancing has been good. I think we can all learn something from this. Let's not talk to each other more in the future after we're past all this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you never know, like just a bar of plutonium, like it's not, not specific on what kind of bar it is. That's true.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh man, so interesting times that we live in where everybody has to stay at home. You're only allowed to go out and exercise once a day. You're not allowed to speak to people that aren't part of your household or at least you have to be two meters away from them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I went to town the other day and everybody was ignoring all these rules. Everybody was just out doing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I did notice that instead of handshaking, you know, people who work at the same office when they bump into each other on the weekend or whatever, and it's always like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's the safest way of bumping these days.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kids are, you know, kids are, they don't have any concept of what's going on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Don't get me wrong, they're probably a bit like scared because things have changed or whatever, but and they're like, you get out there and then you're like, okay, we're going to go outside, but you can't go near anyone. They're just running around like up to people and stuff. Like, oh fuck, I just told you don't go near anyone, but they don't, they don't, they don't understand, you know, like they're just going to do shit the way that they've always done it. So you can't really stop them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's, it's, it's weird, isn't it? It's a weird one. My, my son has been FaceTiming his friends who are also at home in quarantine.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Man, you should just get them like one of those like, uh, stock market, like penny trading apps or something and just let them go fucking nuts. Like figure it out, you know, do like all like the calculations, the math and stuff. I think that's much more useful and then potentially your household can make some money off the back of the seat.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That there ever was and that there ever will be.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Start them low and then you can go for high stakes stuff when they, when they have a control over the app, you know, they know how to use the app better.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know who's doing it? It's the guy on the World of Warcraft auction house that undercuts you by a thousand gold instead of one, one copper. That's the guy who's doing it. That's the guy who's buying high and selling low because when you sell low things sell faster and that's of course more important.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, see, I don't agree with that because I don't want them to be better than me. I want to be the best.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So when I go, I wanna ensure that they are nowhere near as good as me so that I can die comfortably knowing that I am the best and I died the best and nobody's ever gonna overtake me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you want to look at it this way too, having, having children is like an investment, right? It's like kind of part of, it's the same way that you would invest into a pension fund because if you invest into your kids enough and in certain societies, this, this holds true than, than in others.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, but I'm talking about people who are willing to, to tolerate you as an elderly person, because let's face it, the rest of society is not up for it, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Let alone as an elderly person. The West, we just see old people as a, as


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like crusty and, and a pain in the ass. Nobody wants to do anything with them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Everybody just wants to shove them into retirement homes and forget about them and stuff like that. But I think if you have a good relationship with your kids, like, you know, they might build a little house for you to live in, like next to theirs and stuff, you know, like they'll, they might look after you, might have a, a really pleasant old, old life instead of, you know, just being forgotten about.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well that's why a lot of monarchies have failed though. Tons of them have dissolved over the years. There's only a couple that aren't like massive dictators and stuff. I think the British monarchy is probably one of the best examples of


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uhm, you know, a monarchy that has, that has like, uh, it's like a constitutional monarchy and it, and it, and it works quite well. Uh, it's not like, uhm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Prince Charles? How do you think about this, Prince Charles? Prince Charles, what do you think about what I'm saying here about the monarchy?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, but there's definitely, like in a monarchy, there's, there's some proofing in it, right? Like, um, because you could have like a situation whereby, you know, you would have had like Charles and then like Andrew and the other one. Oh, back in the day. Yeah, they'd kill a weak king. But then Charles went to have.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, nobody cares. So, and then so, but because Charles had children, then they get pushed back because his children take, take priority, right? And then his children's children take priority and now they've changed it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yes, but they've recently changed it where, uh, where women or girls are part of the lineage now too. So Princess Charlotte is, you know, in the order that she was born, she is in line for becoming the queen, which is like a recent change. But you see what I mean? It makes it so that some of the undesirables get pushed back.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Further and further and further. Oh I see, cause yea, in a monarchy they always change the rules. Nobody wants King Andrew or King Edward. You know what I mean? Like, or even, or even Charles. You know what I mean? Like, hopefully they just wait out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nobody's doing that. Nobody's leaving massive lump sums. It's all assets and like, by the time his son takes it over, it'll be either, it'll be entrusted.