[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh dude, all of a sudden, you've got hours to kill, which was never a thing, right? Way back in the day, you're hunting all day, and then you have no relief, there's no leisure because you gotta get the next day and hunt again, but if you're farming...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you like stock it up on food, then you got, what do I do all day?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now I can sit and think and invent stuff and, and write and write stories and do plays.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They'd get some work done. So bear could start farming, set up a little garden. They'd get some work done. They could contribute something for once.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Still though, that's gotta be, is that the largest industry in the world?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Could be any. I think it was just like a mom and pop tobacco or was it, did they contract it with a big tobacco company?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you don't get into it to make money. You get into it for the love of the game, dude.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The FFA has over 850,000 members throughout the country.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The FFA announcing who would like the president of the chapters or the national organization.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And these kids were going nuts, dude. I watched it for like 30 minutes. I had no idea what was going on. I still don't understand what the FFA does, but those kids are fired up. I think the ones that are into it is a big part of who they are.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Luke Bryan is a great one too. Rain makes corn, corn makes whiskey. Whiskey makes my baby a little frisky. So you should check that out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What, I'm gonna ask you a question, I don't want the table to make fun of me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it's literally just food for the cattle.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it comes in those barrels, that's the, uh, the bays. What are they called? A bale. Bale? Oh, bale.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Okay. And they just, you just spread those out and then they eat them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] My dad raises hay and sells a lot of hay. Okay. Could you farm in the right temperature where you never need hay all year if they just eat grass all year long?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, like Bonnaroo does. This is Willie Nelson, Neil Young, John Mellencamp, Dave Matthews. This is a crazy line.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is there a number that we can attribute to? We're talking about Cal Sparty, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is there a relief in that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. A relief you didn't even realize that you needed at the time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, and so it's. Madden's perfect. You can hop on and play for 15 minutes and you're done. The video games I used to play, you'd have to play for eight hours to get anything done. It would just take over your life.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Could be related to Philly's first baseman, Reece Hoskins.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Now we can do this episode will be kind of farming or almost farming. It's like staying farming more as a meta. We really discuss it more as a metaphor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Did an actual thing which is great. Basically plow in the field here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, my friend I used to live with. That was one of his favorites when he was in community college. We went to Ball State.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They would skip class and they would go to this farm and they would tip cows.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This weekend, Friday and Saturday, I'm in Toledo, Ohio at the Funny Bone. And then Sunday night, I'm going all the way from Toledo to Oklahoma City.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] At Brick Town Comedy Club. That's uh, Toledo in Oklahoma City. Bad routing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, it's not a perfect plan. 2001. Yeah. Change the world in a real way.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Good happens in even, bad in odd. Is that what you're saying? Sure. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It has, uh, it is a good trailer, but they play, uh, you know, kind of like rock music along with my jokes, which I don't really feel like fits, uh, my jokes. You know what I mean? Like, like some of the jokes that I used on there, I like them all, but some of them are more subtle jokes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so when you're like hitting it with some real rock, it feels like, uh, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That would be more my vibe. Yeah. Like I hit a joke and then the saxophone plays a little bit. Yeah. You know, or maybe just some soft piano. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What hat did you wear? Uhm, I wore my own hat. Oh, there you go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well no, I mean, no, I'm not worried about it because that stuff is true. So, so I'm not worried about that. My dad did go, he goes, what's with this working man thing?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And see, my dad still has my pictures from, you know, like high school hanging in my old room, even though my old room is nothing like when I was growing up, the pictures are still on the wall. So my dad's still in, in his mind, I'm still like this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Failing Spanish class in high school, you know, it's the only class I was not doing well in, but, uh, oh, Spanish. Yeah. And he can't, he's like, you know, acting like I never worked a day in my life. I've had several jobs.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I probably had more jobs than my dad, if I'm being honest.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think I had four of my jobs I think I did twice.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like I worked at Papa John's twice, I worked at Western Sizzlin' twice, I worked at Spectreside twice, and at Hymen's twice.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So that would have been eight jobs had I not just gone back.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've worked at the planners in downtown Charleston, very nice hotel. And it was, uh, yeah, I mean those cars.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, you had an earpiece that you would wear. And so when people would pull up, they would say, especially if they were coming back, they would tell you in the year, Oh, this is Mr. Johnson.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, and then I'm supposed to go out and go, welcome back, Mr. Johnson. And I had a real hard time with that. I'm very polite to people, but I have a hard time being like, Oh, welcome back to the hotel, Mr. Johnson. Can I help you with those bags? I'm just like, Hey, you know, I mean, I'm, I'm good to talk, but I can't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. I mean, I go, you know, I, I just like to talk to everybody. Like we're just normal people out here. Yeah. You know? Yeah. So I have a hard time with, with that. So it wasn't for me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And plus there are other bellhops and they would get real competitive, you know, cause they want to make money and I'm like, I want to make money too, but I'm not trying to, you know, not trying to trip you up, you know, to get to the.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The client. Yeah. Who was telling you? It's Mr. Johnson. The front desk people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then, you know, and then you'd get in the elevator and the front desk people would be making jokes with you in the elevator about the people and it's hard to not laugh, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's kind of like a cool like, yeah, I got kicked out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then I messaged him and I was like, as far as I know, this is a surprise party. And he thought that I was just got very rude with him and he thought I just waved him, but I was like, I don't know what to do here. He said something about it later. He was like, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That changed who Brian was. I mean, I was into long hair baits. I was like, this guy's awesome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, it brought you an energy that I've not seen before.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was good. It was a good vibe though. I, I want you to get it. I want you to wear a wig like that. I know you told me multiple times that night.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm a Reese's Pieces pronouncer too though. I don't- Reese's Pieces? Reese's Pieces, yeaah. Yeaah. I know it says Pieces, but, you know, Reese's Pieces. Reese's Pieces.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, reswither spoon. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it's a last name. But when you break down Hershey's, maybe Ruth Hershey's Kisses, right? That sounds better than Pieces.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've got some bombs. They probably stole from the company. Oh yeah. Started making that candy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe the PCs just, uh, kept him from getting in sooner. They were like, actually this is hurting your legacy a bit.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That sounds, that sounds like the worst that could possibly be. People go worse comes to worse. I'll just do this. See how I like it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's not just the worst, it's worse comes to worse. It's as worst as worse can get.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was thinking of all the unbelievable things in this movie. That's what gets me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It was, it was great to not have unlimited options all the time. It makes you appreciate a movie better.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because the last name and I thought maybe he was like, he was like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hmm. Desi, you wanna tell us about Helix Sleep? I sure do. Thanks to our friends at Helix Sleep.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, okay, I read that in a way that, uh, there's a period, not a comma. Uh, thanks to our friends at Helix Sleep. Lucky for you, they are- oh, okay. Geez. Sorry, guys. Lucky for you, they are Helix is- no, that's not my bad. That's- Just speak from the heart.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners. I love Helix mattress. I got, I got a couple. I got a lot of pillows by them. I love them. It's very comfortable. Now when I go to hotels, I can't sleep because they don't have Helix.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Helix Sleep is our favorite premium mattress brand with tailored mattresses based on your unique sleep preferences. The Helix lineup offers 20 unique mattresses including a award-winning Luxe collection, the new Helix Elite collection, a mattress designed for big and tall sleepers, and even a mattress made just for kids.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Take the Helix Sleep Quiz. Find your perfect mattress in under two minutes. Helix mattresses are shipped straight to your door, free of charge, with easy, no contact delivery.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pretty easy to transport too. I've had them mailed to my house. I've not been home. My neighbor had to get it, bring it into his house and I had to get him to bring it over later. He's not a big, very big guy, but we were able to do it and he hated it, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He was able to do it. Unlike a lot of mattress companies out there, Helix owns its own manufacturing company. Helix supports military first responders, teachers, and students by giving them a special discount on site.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They offer 100 day, uh, 100 night trial to try out the new Helix Masters and offer a 10 to 15 year warranty. By supporting Helix, you are allowing them to support Naitland.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners. Go to helixsleep.com slash Nate and use code helixpartner20. This is their best offer yet and it won't last long. With Helix, better sleep starts now. Sorry guys, I've not read off paper in a long time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, okay. On an even or odd year? Doesn't say.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Why 17? What'd you come up with Brian, according to this?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like Ohio. You know, when I lived in Charleston, we had the Charleston city paper and they put out a paper one time. And I think I've mentioned this before, but the paper, a lot of Ohio people apparently were moving to Charleston and they had a paper and the cover said, go back to Ohio.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not that I was aware of. I mean, the city paper, you know, it's a bit of a...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And, uh, they did put some of my friends up there. I'm not saying my friends didn't deserve to be there, but, but I did too. And, uh, uh, so I'm mad at them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I was. They're on the front page of the.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's like a, it's like a, the Nashville scene that we have here. Kind of the equivalent to that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We were hot in the art scene. I mean, we had a hot scene for a while. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I was voted, you know, best local comic for two years in a row and I never got a cover.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. So I thought, you know, and I'd never been to Ohio, but I thought, wow, I wonder what's going on there, why everyone's leaving and why we don't want them to come here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But there's so many clubs, there's funny, there's like, I mean, Cleveland has clubs and, uh, Toledo and Dayton and Cincinnati.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Columbus, uh, I mean, they're all over the place. That might be it, but yeah, that's a lot. That's still a lot. That's a lot.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, I feel like I can see that. I feel like, you know, real Southern Ohio, you're like practically Kentucky.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So you could have a Southern accent, real Northern Ohio. Aren't you right near Michigan? So if you're in Toledo, you could really have a Michigan accent and Michigan for sure has an accent.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wish that newscasters where they're at in the country had an accent that represented it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nashville is very centrally located. That's why it is a good hub for traveling comics. Especially if you're driving. It's really good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, North Carolina's not really known for being too flat though, huh? The coast would be. I guess so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I went out there in the Outer Banks. I saw some Wright Brothers stuff. There's a club out there, right? It was a club called the Comedy Club of the Outer Banks.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't know if it's still there, I don't want to say they've closed, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I do like that this guy was like, I'm, I'm running on being tough and I'm going to show you that I'm tough. And he, I, I still believe he was tough.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, you would think that you would need to know a little bit about music, you know, and you'd be like, uh, they're not really highlighting a lot of rock and roll bands down here. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I don't know, maybe you're not well versed in it, maybe you are, I don't know. I'm not. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah. So it's a pyramid, huh? Yeah. It's like a cone. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hey, hey there. That's right. You were in the country music hall of fame. I wasn't there yet. You know, I was, uh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] On the show, I guess the first show that they called it the show that never happened at the Opry when COVID shut down, uh, COVID shut the Opry down. I was on that lineup.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So that lineup was hanging in the, uh, country music hall of fame. I don't know if it still is, but it was in there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Let's go back to the triangles. Yeah. Let's do, yeah, the Cleveland triangles. Let's get it going.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're just naming things, you see. Yeah, with the national tables. Yeah, we named it that cause, you know, we were coming up with names. We were sitting at a table and we were like, you know what? This is where it all started.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I mean, there's no need to, when you go to a museum and people are just stopping at every little thing, it's like, what are you, it's all, it's all lies. Just move through.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, you know, yeah. And there's airplanes. I'm like, I love to look at an ear.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Daddy woo woo. Daddy woo woo's coming, Sloop. Sloop, what is Sloop?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I can't answer this honestly. Bone, thugs, and harmony. Oh yeaah. They're from Cleveland.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Who's that on this list? To me, Steve Harvey is my favorite off this list.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, you know, when I was in Liberty, Ohio, the Liberty township, I went to a Cabela's and I found a bear, uh, sign that said, Hey bear.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh really? Yeah, I took a picture of it, but it's, this was a while back. You might want to move on. You didn't buy it? I didn't buy it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he's waving, and the guy's waving. I feel like they completely ripped us off. That is me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Look at that. Camilla's ripped off this whole podcast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Tuesday, January 16th, my Netflix will come out, so.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Watch that. Tell your friends to watch it. It's gonna be great. It is great. I know it's great because I, I recorded it and uh, I know what it looks like. I'm very happy with how it looks. I'm very happy with the jokes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, I'm not always happy with everything that I film and uh, I am happy with this. I'm very pumped about it. I had to be involved in the whole editing process and sometimes when you watch it over and over again, you start to hate it. Well, I didn't start to hate it. I love it. So check that out and then January 20th.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I said 19th earlier, January 20th, I'll be in Dayton, Ohio at the funny bone.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Today's episode of the Neyland Podcast is brought to you by ButcherBox, Robin Hood, and Factor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Hello folks and hey bear, welcome to the Nate Land podcast. I'm Nate Barghetti, uh, Brian Bates, Aaron Weber, Dusty Slick. All right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Y'all had a big weekend, right? Yeah. Yeah. We did. You were in Vegas, right? Yeah. My weekend was crazy. I'm going to go to yours for, you know, I'm just trying to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I mean, they might not even know me. Like, I'm just, you get some, like, I mean, I think some obviously will, but like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, but uh, so he might've hurt you on that late show, the one that didn't sell out. Aaron might've hurt you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But it was awesome. I'm here for breakfast, I'm not here for brunch.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You just be on. Every time someone starts a car, it's just, hello folks!


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeaah. I know, how do you fix that? Mine was, mine's Bates' album. Uh, either his or Mike Vic's. Easy out. Easy out. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Mine will be his or Vickyone's. Sometimes Chad Daniels. I have Chad Daniels. I have like, but it's always comedy. And you just, if for some reason it's like comedy is the one you don't want. Cause you're just like, just let me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But my, but I mean how does Apple, cause it just automatically starts playing, like that stuff, is that really fixed? They have that figured out? There's probably a way.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well also, well they have Turo now. You know, I mean you could try Turo, and I mean there you could rent, I mean you could, I mean halftime Turo you could rent a,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Mercedes for the same price of a Camry. They have Corvettes you can rent. That would be, you know, not too much more than just a regular car with.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How do they not have a green room but then you-


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To real skinny seven, you're going to see hello world weight. You're going to be talking all, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that seems crazy. Maybe he just threw it against a wall when he walked out there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Why don't you not go like, uh, is this shark holding a carrot? And they go, what? I can't even join this conversation. I'm like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think you go and go to LA. I just kind of like, you enjoy that. It's going to take a long time to drive. Like I, you know, I think I'm not in my, you know, I'm not driving a ton anyway, so here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah. Oh, we're going to go here and it's one mile away. It'll take an hour.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's where you go to LA to Turo. That's another one. You can go Turo. They rent some crazy cars on Turo.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yeaah, you can rent, like, you know, go rent a Mustang.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You accept what's happening and then go, I'm gonna make this thing, you know, yea, if you're in a old, you know, corolla, then it's gonna feel pretty good.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that goes, that goes a long way. So it's nice that they're doing it, but yeah, I'm still like, you know, I'm just. You really take the man, using the managers to full extent.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You just, so you always say wait tables? I think we talked about that.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yeaah, I think even if it's really bad and you don't hit the stars...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're either, I guess you could not hit them and you don't rate it at all.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But yeah, you just like, I don't want to, if you put a one, you're like, I'm probably going to get emailed what happened. And then now you're in it with some, and you're like, dude, I don't want to be.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, yeaah, I mean, I actually liked y'all's weekend better. Just everything that went the way I wanted to go.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This, uh, my week, I was, I was, I've looked forward to this week for a long time because I knew it was going to be like an insane week. We went to Vegas, uh, saw all these shows at The Wind, and so we were at Vegas Wednesday, two shows night, Wednesday, Friday, Saturday. You have Thursday off, which is nice.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So yeaah, it was, so yeaah, so we're at the, uh, this is not Las Vegas, you've seen the video.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, but it's, uh, so we get to the win and then, you know, hang out, Greg Garcia came down, uh, hang out, so it was very fun. Gary Veeder, Nick Novicki was there, you know, my dad, uh, my nice friend Rick and there, uh, and so it was, uh, and then my, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, no, I mean, no one, you know, college basketball is getting to a point where you like really don't know who these kids are. You just kind of know teams kind of or whatever. Uh, but so it's,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The whole, but the whole week was like super fun, just gambling, Gary Veeder, like it's, we were just, uh, Gar, Garcia is so funny and so fun to play with, uh, and


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he just, I mean, he signs up for all the chaos that we're, that is among us. Uh, so we played all week. The shows and bakes were awesome. We had a lot of fun. I was trying to think if there was anything, any fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We had a show, it was crazy, it was midnight, we were in Las Vegas at midnight, and we had a show at 3pm in Boston.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In Eastern time. So it would have been, yeah, midnight and so we technically had a show at noon, right?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] 12 hours. So we had 12 hours. So we got to Boston, uh, it was basically just kind of taking the little naps on the plane, little naps right when we got to Boston, uh, and then, uh, and then we did the Boston Garden at 3 PM. Uh, and I was like, it was, it was, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I, like when we, when I said I was gonna do this weekend, you know, at first it was like, I don't know unless you had canceled like some of the Vegas just to not have it. But then I was like, you know what, let's just go, let's just do it. Cause it's, hey, it's just crazy. Yeah. And, uh, and the Boston garden was, uh, nuts. I wore this, my Boston Celtics.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sure, uh, it was insane. We went, usually they would try to walk to a pro, the, where they sell the gifts.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Are the, you know, the shop. The team store. Team store. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so usually it's in the arena. And so we go down and since it's three, well, we go look at it and it's.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's just out by the train station. Like there's a train station underneath the garden.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so we're just like, they take us down, you're like, I'm just, it's people waiting in line to get in the show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I was like, I don't, this might not be good, but I mean, I made it into the store and I just had my hat down and a hood on. I mean, I guess no one's going to ever think you would be walking around.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The gifts, you know. Right outside the venue. Yeah, uh, and as you walk past your line of people, the, yeah, the Boston Garden was, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, pretty surreal. Did you go in the locker room or anything like that? I think we were supposed to, but I mean it just wasn't as normal of a trip because we...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Everybody was just kinda so tired and just kinda, I'm not tired, like, you get pumped up for the show, but it's, it's, you know, you're just kinda like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, just like, oof, like when you're not on the show, you're kinda just sitting, you're watching some games.


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[Assistant] How many people are there, do you know? Uh, I wanna say it's close to 30,000 for both shows. Gosh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's crazy. And then over the two, I mean, cause then Vegas Saturday, so I believe it was a 24 hour period. I did four shows.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Cause I did two in Vegas, let's see, that was seven, first show was at 7.30, so that's, uh, five. 10.30 Boston time. Yeah. Yeah. 10.30 Boston time. So yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Two shows, uh, four shows in 24 hours. Uh, but it was great. I mean, it was, it was, the whole week was fun and it just was, you know, there's us hanging out from the Boston South. Julian was there with us as well. And it was your birthday. It is my birthday.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Such a cool idea. They put that, a big, it's a Happy Birthday Nate card. It's a giant card. I mean it's, it's, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's like one of those Harper watches all these cake things, you know. Is it cake? One of those shows? Yeah. Yeah. And I mean, it's unbelievable. Would you rather it be cake or a actual McDonald's cake?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, well I mean at first I did walk in and was like, is that just a big hamburger? You're like, those fries better not be cake. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The fries were just paintings. Yeah, so, it was, yeah, I mean, I've never seen one of those cakes in person.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, it's wild. I mean, such a crazy thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, so yeaah. The whole, the whole thing, I mean, uh, yeaah, maybe people are so nice to write, like, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, they were, uh, it was, yeah, it was just super cool, man. I mean, just a crazy, crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Experience, Nick, Nick's parents were there, which was great. And you know, his dad was just, I mean, his dad's been to that arena watching, uh, all these shows and, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it was wild. So yeah, I mean, I don't know if there's anything that crazy we posted on.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah, he does great. Yeaah, it looks, yeaah, it's fun. It's showing, we're having a good time. We're having a fun time. It was, uh, yeaah, I mean it was a, you know, it was like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It'd be fun to go, uh, do the Boston Garden again, uh, and not be tired. No, I wasn't, it wasn't, I'm not saying I was tired during the show, but it was just a wild, it was like, I did it to like, be like, you know what?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is like, kind of feels like, you know, it's that extreme, like, you know what? Let's just do it. Yeah. Let's just do it. Four shows, 24 hours.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Yeah, Laura, my mom and my mom came up, my dad's there and Abigail's there. And so it was, uh, everybody, you know, it was my family's there and, uh, Derek did not, Derek did not come, but it was, uh, I forgot about Derek. Yeah. The middle brother.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We had an autograph that, or someone signed a thing that said, this is from a middle child, so you probably won't see it. Happy birthday. That's funny. Uh, but yeah, yeah, I mean, so I, I don't know, I don't have some big...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like y'all stories more, your stories are more fun, not religious, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, I brought that up on stage. Did ya? That you were gonna be pretty upset about it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, this dude looks, like he says, you know, everybody thinks he's you. Your hat, glasses, long hair dude.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, so it's, he looked like you, and that was enough. So maybe there was just, that was enough.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What would you want to say to John? I mean, do you have any roast stuff? Well, you know, he doesn't want to hear it, so I'll...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh yeaah. You just send him a, who else? Someone send a video.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Dustin. Nickerson. No, Nickerson. Someone else did a video.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Court, our buddy Court McCown. Cause he was there Thursday, we golfed. And my buddy Rich was there, and we golfed all of that. But there, uh, yeah, Court was like, they played my video? And I was like, no. And he was like, they didn't play it? And I was like,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I had to look him in the eyes as I watched it so. He goes, what are you dressed up for?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, oh yeah, that seemed great. Yeah, we went up. Making fun of the fact that that's what he does.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He goes, pick me or Dusty. And we go, well obviously. Yeaah. He put us back just in the corner.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You go, at the end of it, I had, you were like, alright, we'll see ya. Like you're- No, I said- Yes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, yeah, but no, he always said something nice. Did you say something nice? I don't know if you did it even now. After you started it. He wouldn't have said anything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So yeah, this is the real 40. We're going to celebrate another 40 for him. Cause he stays the same age.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Hope Waller, Florida is the scapegoat, Hope, Florida is the scapegoat for all of America. As a Floridian, it feels like great, it feels really great to hear four non-Floridians back us up. Florida's the best, glad y'all liked it too.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're kinda used to it if you're down. If you live in the south, you're just kinda used to it. People just have a, they think what it is. But everybody, you know, everybody thinks what New York is. Everybody thinks what California, you know. Everybody's got the thing. Good people everywhere. Andrew Kong.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Boat ramps experiences at Panama City Beach include being burned to lobster status and being told he looks perpetually worried.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, Chris Scott, Aaron's experience with The Devil's Itch. Yeah, yeah, you're the one that cursed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Erin's experience, sunburn reaction made me feel so validated. I've had this happen twice. One time being on a big family vacation. Everyone thought I was overreacting or crazy. And after being in severe pain for hours, I finally thought to put ice on it to stop the itch. Worst thing I've ever felt in my life. So ice.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I think you're saying nice stuff because I think you just said the worst idea I ever had, like. Okay. But I know what you mean, I kinda, uh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wouldn't even know what that means. I don't either. Uh, Marshall Barker. Marshall Barker. That's a good name. Marshall Barker.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And my dad, I forgot, I don't remember. But I guess they went up. Nick had, uh, to go see some friends. And so they went up to go see him in the suite. My dad went up. I think we have this on video. I haven't seen the video.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so, uh, but they go hump and they knock on the door. You know, Nick can't see anything. So he's knocks on the door. The guy opens it. The guy's like, Hey, like, I guess they're going up there during my set.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And so they're going, so they go up, I'm on stage and then the guy goes, Hey, and then, uh, he's like, ah, is he asking if this person's there? And the person's like, yeah, they're not here, but come on in. And it's, he's at the wrong number.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he looks at it and suddenly he goes, huh? And he looks, he goes, ah, it's 14. And so now they all, so these people just are watching the show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I just saw him and my dad perform and then Veeder went too. So the, all the, all the opening acts now are just looks like they're going around during my set.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And just knocking on doors and just crashing parties. And there are video in it. And they're being like, and so Nick just, and he just, I mean, he's like, hey, and he has to walk in and he's, I mean, just confused. And then goes, it's 14. He just puts it up to, you know, he puts his phone next to his eyeball. It's 14. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Let's see, we also had a bet this weekend, uh, on some game. Greg Garcia.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Josh Young. Dusty's a true man of the people. Barely takes the time to watch Nate's special, but all over the YouTube comments with the folks.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Sarah-chia-chia. Sarah-chia.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In 2024, the 13 year and 17 year cicadas are both emerging. The last time this happened was in 1803, when Thomas Jefferson was president. The Louisiana Purchase had just been made and there were only 17 states.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's going to be a big year for the Cicadas. Oh, that's this year.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I bet they forget each other. I bet they don't recognize each other. They go, John, you have aged.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, that is crazy. The last time was Thomas Jefferson was president in 1803. Yeah. Uh, Mark Swisher.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Clip-on ties have a bad rep, but there is a tactical reason for wearing them. All Secret Service agents on security detail wear clip-ons so the tie can't be used to strangle them when they get into a tussle. Some police forces do the same thing. That makes perfect sense.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And you would do it. And theirs looks pretty good. You don't think to, you wouldn't.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I would not have known that just looking at them. I bet, I bet you're, we're not far from having clip-on ties. Clothing tends to be going to


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That sounds like something Marshall Barker would put in. That's true. That's true. And Aaron Yantz, I don't see Aaron E R I N spelled that way. I mean, come on. That's the biggest surprise post I've ever seen in my life. Aaron Yantz is going like, yeah, we're eating oranges off trees and swamp cabbage.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wonder why angels would be considered.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, well that still would be a compliment to win. I know, you're as pretty as the devil. Yeah. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ezekiel Lucifer. Ezekiel Smith. Oh. How about that? Well timed. Yeah, that's crazy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, that audacity of despair, Obama joke deserved more. Alright. I got it in the moment. I went to Notre Dame.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Aaron is carrying the weight of this podcast on his broad shoulders.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, yeaah, I think broad shoulders is, I think you wanna have broad shoulders.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Because I got a picture with Aaron after one of his shows that I thought looked, that I, that I thought I looked pretty good in, so I cropped him out and used to pick for my office badge. Alright. That's pretty good. You have your hand around her? I mean that's the only...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I guess so. Maybe you can just crop it in close.


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[Assistant] Elizabeth Hernandez. Hello, barren hay folks. I saw this news story and immediately thought I needed Dusty's take on this. My kids love the pods and it's questionable yet educational content. That's what we want.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] At a party? Yeah, but you would have to go like, alright, I'm gonna auction this pin off.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] All right. I didn't know that. Yeah. Could you go to, uh, so yeah, what's auctioneer school? Like you just, it's just a school for, yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They should be all clear. Yeah, I bet there's not a lot of them. So I mean, you probably get some work and I bet they make some good money. And if you can get some big, big things.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like you get those auctioneers that are doing- Those charity events? Yeah, like doing real high, high things.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think you gotta end on the auctioneer and you would have to have the auction thing be comedy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It almost be like they would just hire you to be like, I'll run your auction. I'm going to also be funny up top and tell some jokes and then I'll start leaning into it. And you can be like, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not. And you do that when you're like the guy in the red shirt, you go, what's wrong? You make fun of that guy. Like you just make it a whole thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think people get annoyed. I've seen those too.


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[Assistant] I bet 15 is a tough one for him. It seemed like you had, I bet they're saying like you don't say, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. I do like the idea of being in that zone. Like it's a zone that you're like that person at that moment is in the most control of that room.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Even though the room feels like there's no control.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's a great, great feeling. It's a, I mean, the guy's a master at it. Like you go, cause you're just like, if you're sitting there, you go, what is this guy talking? This dude just like, he knows everything. It's like slow in his head and he's just, you know, he knows everything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, they're trying to get it going, but I mean, like, that's probably the worst ones, cause you're, you know, you're like, alright, you go to one of these houses, you're like, I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna make anything. Like, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's uh, and you probably have, I wonder if you have any idea, I guess.


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[Assistant] There's like a guarantee, like you're like, I'll do it, lowest would be a thousand dollars. But I'll try to get it up for you. But I'm not, you know, I bet that's what the, the bigger they get, the more they can do that. Hmm.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do you have tattoos? No tattoos. No one has tattoos here? No. My wife has a tattoo.


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[Assistant] Yeah, I know, I know Jenny Slade. I didn't know she had the same birthday.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe someone I know. They did it where it was, then they had the wrong day or the wrong week or so. Your dad?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm glad you looked that up. I feel like they won movies though, like that was, you knew the people that won the movie, they won the Oscar then.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is, have we not talked, I thought we talked about that. Yeah, we did, but what was that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I've never seen it. And Tom Hanks is in it too, he's a comic. Yeah, he told me he never did a comic. Everybody, there's things that say he did stand up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I, I thought he did stand up. I thought you said he never did a comedy. I'm like, I can name a few. Yeah, no, he did stand up comedy. There was a thing the other day I looked up, like actors that have done stand up comedy and he's on there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, and he said he never did, he never did, because I never done it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He looked like a standup in the movie. Yeah. Oh yeah. The movie, I didn't even watch it again. It's a great, incredible actor.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The movie's like, it shows, like, they have lockers and... Yea, that's the...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like a locker and I don't know if I would really need a locker anymore. I've found never really a time where I'm like, I need a locker.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well they would do it at theaters, y'all would do it. I think you'd go set your phone up in the very back of the theater. Which is not the best.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I started to, like, on where just people didn't feel. We didn't have iPhones then.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yes, and- And cam recorders weren't good. No, it was like more of a hassle.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To do it, yea, you could bring a, your, uh, recorder.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like a little recorder, people would set those on there. But it's like, I just, when I started, it was just...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There is no reason you'd be filming, so I just never have done it.


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[Assistant] Yeah. Well, I think if you do that, you, you probably gonna, you need to talk to the person and go, Hey,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Is there a night you can guarantee me to get it so I can film or wait till you get


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So what's the, why was the food pyramid, why was it so big at the bottom? It's like, that's just...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They're saying that's what you should eat. You should eat a corner of vegetables, some fruits, grains, and protein. But some of those corners, vegetables is the biggest one there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think Factor probably want you to do another little call to action and say, you haven't only been eating Factor for the past three years. Oh, that's for sure.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like he hasn't done, you know, I'm saying I've gone. Right. You fluctuated. Yea. Yea, I gotta take a special. It's gonna be this. It's not gonna be good. Are you gonna have a line about it at the top?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Here we are. Uh. Here we are. Yeah. I said that at one of them. Here we are. Oh yeah. No, I don't think I, I don't have one this time. Next thing. I have another line about, I have a line about eating better. You know, I gotta get on it. It's just, man.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It stinks. It's hard. It's very, very hard. And you just need to get built up this one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I hope it's not that guy. Uh, who is it? It's who you think it is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Your head's like, your head's like, we're fine dude. Your body's like, we're fine too. I basically fasted. Yeah. What are you eating tonight?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like soy is healthy for you ever. I think it's a soybean.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Kiwi. Kiwi, man, I didn't have kiwi until...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Recently, when I was in Alaska, I think I had Kiwi. Was it the first time you had Kiwi? Yea. Really? Yea, Kiwi wasn't ever around. Yea, I feel like it's uh, it shows up places now. Well, you had money growing up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I remember Kel really coming around and being popular. It just started showing up everywhere. And it's just on every menu.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, and you would scoop the thing that was sitting in the kill.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Would you always, when you go out, would you get the ice from the buffet for your drink? Yeah. Underneath all the food? Yeah. That's how?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Barley. No one even knows what that is. Nobody, nobody eats barley.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, when you read them now, it's like there, there is every beginning of an art. It's like a long story. So it's like, it's Tuesday.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's cold outside and I thought, you know what, maybe I'll go try running. And then, then they go into this whole big thing and that thing will be like, is running good for you? But then it's like a story. If you're trying to get those keywords in, it's all SEO.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You just don't like bacon. It's just, you know, one of your reasons.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'm always, I'm convinced I'm, I'm, I think my sodium, I've always thought for me it's sodium. Sodium's, uh. That's what you want? I think I know, I think I feel it. The most. Oh, your sodium was high. My sodium, yeah. Uh huh. I think I can feel sodium, I think it's what makes you feel bloated. All that salt.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What if you do the milkshake in the corner? I think that could happen. I've had it with pizza sometimes. It's like where you can catch fire. Still do it. Had milkshake this weekend.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So man, I wanted donuts today too. It was a surprise. I didn't know I was getting donuts and I woke up and ended up getting donuts and for some that brain that was, phew, that started the day off for a right.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's the best thing I've ever had in my life. I would drink.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I couldn't even tell you. I mean, I looked and nodded.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This is about 98 or something. One. Oh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, about four liters, cause I'll have a liter bottle of water, as a gallon, I'll try to drink a gallon a day.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And yeah, you had the food pyramid, you had like, you know, everybody's got kids. I mean, everybody's just making dinner to eat dinner. You're just, it's busy, no money. Like there's no reason to.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But they, yeaah, I mean some people, yeaah, they're just, yeaah, they're, they're, they're born, the other family's just into, yeaah, healthy kind of food. Into caring about their kids.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I think it's, I mean, it's just the knowledge of what this food does. You just, you know, no one really knows. And now they're looking at it and now we're like, oh, it's, yeah, we're really, really got a problem. And these things are, you know, even Southern cooking that my mom is still now, but I'm not great with Harper. She needs to eat better, but I still eat. I don't eat. Laura does. Laura's the better one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, but it's just hard, like it is. It's hard, but you gotta be self-disciplined. So you just have to do it. It's figured out on your own.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No one's gonna figure it out. And I mean, that's why I go back. I lost all this weight for this last special and I'm back to basically where we started that one night.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I can out-talk anybody. But we can try to do, well the road is where I do all this stuff. When I come home, it's just...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The, the wheels come off. And my brain, it is true, my brain can't think of.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like I, I really would need to learn to cook. That's what probably the best thing someone could do is you learned, I don't know how to cook. So I can't cook anything.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I bet it's still better than, I think if you're cooking, yeah, I think if you're cooking home meal, like that's why, I don't think people back where they weren't, there weren't no fast food, there was no, this minute grab something to eat, like you had to go. No margarine. Yeah, you just can't, uh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, and you just can't, you can't eat.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, you had to like really go wait to eat something. I read even olive oil.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's crazy. It's like going in there. It's a whole, you know, it's just about like climate change, I think. But it's like showing you, yeah. It's just to check out the screen. Yeah. So just a lot of electricity.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It is very funny because it is, it is a thing that's like, it's just telling you earth and you know, the general idea we're ruining it and all this, but it's like they're, uh, you know, they showed like video of like these other people, countries grabbing water. You basically,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, yeaah, yeaah, no, it was, look, I would, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think what I've heard is, I've heard, if you go to like the concert or something like that, I think it's like kind of crazy and that's probably a little, it's a lot more different stuff. This was crazy. I mean, go do it just to see it, just to have your, like, you're like, okay, I know what it is.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's all I wanted to do. I'd say the outside is, I'm probably the most impressed with the outside.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We'll just go bet it on, go, go take your hundred dollars, put it on black or red. And if you win it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You see the sphere when you fly in. Oh you do? Yea, the outside is unreal. The outside is really, really unreal. I think it's gonna get, there's gonna be a lot of stuff there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The show like, you know, if the show starts at 2, it won't start till 3. They had like AI computers in the lobby or something. Uh, I didn't go, we didn't go early. We got there, show started at 3, we got there like 2.45.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, when you go in there, it's not like it's sold out. It's, you know, but you're just all kind of sitting in the 200 section, I think is where you want to sit. And I mean, dude, when they, when they have earth coming at you on the screen, I mean, it feels, there's moments like you feel like you're on a ride, like you feel like you're like, you're going down. It's, it's very, I think you would, you would like it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. If you look at the IMAX, it's like if you've been to an IMAX screen, you're going to kind of get the idea. Like you're, I honestly kind of believe you're like, it's, it's just the IMAX on steroids. So you're, you're just kind of like, okay. Yeah. Like I, like, yeah, it's more, but okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's uh, that's what I, my honest review of this fear.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They show some, they show some animal, like an elephant walking that's pretty cool. Like, so like they show some of that, but I mean, yeah, the end of it's like, you know, we're just like, we shouldn't be on this planet. I think that's the goal.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It is, they showed the mining, I think, where it's like, you know, they mined for telephones or lithium. It is fun. I mean, all you're in is an electric ball. Like it's just the most.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that'd be like, you saw a movie there, B. It'd be cool. It's, it's, it's cool though. It's crazy. I mean, it's, you know, yeah, it's a big, big thing. If you want to go see it, knock it off. If you're there, you might as well, you know, go knock it off.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I agree, but I, and I think it's the outside for me. The outside is insane. Okay. Cause you can, you're seeing this stuff during the day. There's an eyeball on it. There's, I mean, it's unbelievable. It's the outside. Yeah, watch it. But the outside, when you land and they have a basketball, it's just so detailed.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] To me, the outside is, is wild. I heard Garcia went to both. Greg Garcia.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You do and that, and he was like, if he went.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Again, he's like, you two, it's a complete, he said they're completely two different experiences. And, but the you two one's a little more.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like, if you had to pick one, it's like, that's gonna be more fun and, you know, like, but this one's more of like, you're just kind of going to be like, let me just see. Yeah, I'm going to go. What is this? Yeah. Anyway. Alright. They're going to a UFC fight there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Would you do the sphere in Vegas? Put climate change in the ring. I say all this to be, if I ever do the sphere, I'll be like, whatever I said about the sphere, guys, I need you to come out to the sphere.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So if you had, if you filmed something that was like an act or something that was for, you're using cameras for that where the stuff's just flying overhead, it would be awesome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, what I said, I did say something to Majin, we were just talking, and I was, I was like, you, I mean, you could maybe animate your act.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So as you're talking, you have your act kind of being animated and you could have stuff be popping. So you're trying to take people. I mean, when you're up there, you're kind of like going like, all right, it's a story. But if I did that, I don't even know if I would need to be the one performing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's like, it would be better to like have, you know, the CD or whatever, the audio of it. And then just be like, you can go in there and like, it's just this, and you're watching like all these things happening.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, yeah, I don't know if you have all that technology. I don't know if it's going to be, I think it's going to, the inside I bet just gets better and better and better because they're going to end up making stuff where you're going to go in there and just be like, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh, pshhh.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I see that. You have no opening acts, I guess. You just have...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ideas, you're kinda, you bring people so people can find out about other people. Yeah. Whatever. But I can see you doing something where you wouldn't want anybody on the show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's, you know, a lot of successful people do that, is the...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Go away from what made you successful. So when it wasn't working and then you switch it up and it starts catching on fire and then you go, what if I go back to the part in my life where it didn't work? But it was working. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You're, you're, I, I, I'm joking with you. You're, you will naturally just change. Yeah. Cause it does. My acts completely change. You stay the person that you are.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But you just will change because you're in a bigger place. It's a different pacing. Everything is just kind of different. You're the entire show. You can't be just like up there like ba-ba-ba-ba-ba. It's like you just do it in a completely different way. And that is the beautiful thing about stand up. And that's the.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What I love the most about it is every next step is


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've got to do this and be different. And so then you're like, well, how do I, how do I do what I do? But it, it's, it's in a different setting.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In fact, I wouldn't feel uncomfortable doing my arena. I mean, I would do the jokes. I'd do the jokes in a club.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then go, I mean that was wild with Vegas, because Vegas was, is 1400 seats. So I did 6 shows, 1400 seats, and then go to 2 shows each of 15,000 people.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In the realm, I mean it was just like, it's like wow to be like, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I love the art of stand up. You're telling a story. It's just you talking and you're doing stuff. I hope comics young and coming up now.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, alright, uh, yeaah, I'll be in, I don't know, I think Reno next. I'm off this week.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] There's good planning. I'm about to be jammed out though, uh, for the rest till the end of the tour. Good planning.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, no, it's, I, we go, I think Reno, Sacramento, there's a few, uh, I'm probably forgetting a couple of that. And then, and then next week is the San Jose and then the special tape and excited to tape a special. I'm very excited. I want to get this table, special taped and then, uh, start figuring out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] New stuff. So, uh, yeah, that's all coming up, but you know, Mark, that's it. We love you. Have a wonderful week. Uh, a little 224, over two hours. Yeah. How about it? A little Dusty Slay show right here. That's right. That is true.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Little crowd work. Little crowd work. Mix it in. Uh, alright. See you next week. Bye.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Nate Land is produced by Nate Land Productions and by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife Laura on the AudioBoom platform. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nate Land Podcast.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And all my many, many years of being on this earth, usually it'll snow, it'll be gone in a day or two. It's still on the ground. It's been a week of just so cold.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was in a parking garage today. I was like, what's that noise? And all of a sudden a pipe burst and water just started going everywhere.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] The video at the end of you as little boys really topped it off.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Great games this weekend. Did you see the uh, fumble through the end zone?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And they're bringing you an offer that will help make the playoffs electrifying. New customers can bet 5 bucks on any game and get 200 instantly.


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[Assistant] And bonus bets. I just checked the DraftKings app. You guys know the line for the AFC and UFC championship game?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, currently, uh, it's like right now Baltimore is favored by three over the chiefs. 49ers favored by seven or the lions. You can go and draft Kings app now and use code Nate land.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And new customers can bet 5 bucks to get 200 instantly bonus bets. Only on DraftKings Sportsbooks.


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[Assistant] With code NATELAND, the crown is yours. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER or visit www.1-800-GAMBLER.NET. In New York, call 877-8HOPE-NY or text HOPENY.


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[Assistant] Please play responsibly on behalf of Boothill Casino and Resort in Kansas. 21 plus age varies by jurisdiction. Void in Ontario. Sorry, Graham. Bonus bets expire 168


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[Assistant] Ours after issuance issuance issuance issuance issuance see dkng.com slash football for eligibility and deposit restrictions terms and responsible gaming resources. That's our show folks.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think you were going to tell us about a rule change. I guess that was it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] She was the one we just had on that, uh, talked about her dad dubbing the movies on VHS. Oh yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Benjamin Franklin? No, Thomas Edison. Too many things to do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Ironically, Thomas Edison, same education as Dusty and Nate. Alright, well. Self-educated.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Jimmy Carter was president when you were born and he's still alive. Yeah. How crazy is that?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Someone said the biggest week of Dusty's career and he can't promoted special on this podcast.


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[Assistant] This weekend, I'm at, uh, this Friday, I'm at, uh, Walnut House in Murfreesboro, Tennessee. Two shows there. Saturday, February 17th, I'm at Church of the Heights in Palatka, Florida. I hope I'm saying that wrong.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I get told every day you're ripping off Brian Bakes on stage. Everybody knows I invented waving and saying we're having a good time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] He puts it low behind his back. I'm up high in the front.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Completely out. What does that leave me to do? You gotta come in the middle. You gotta do something about right here. You gotta do this. Yeah, just leave the hand right there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was told that Jeff Allen once, uh, sewed the, sewed shut his coat jack, uh, pockets on his coat jacket because he didn't want to put his hands in there. So he sewed it shut.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like to just move my hands all around in a real distracting manner. That's what I like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I like to do everything that they tell you not to do as a comedian.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Like Ralphie May would say, don't wear a hat. Don't have glasses. Don't have a beard or long hair. Yeah. That's what he said. I think so. I didn't hear it. People tell me he said it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Buy a ticket, hopefully it goes well. Yeah, they don't know if you take all that off when you get home. Yeah. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what I'd like to do. One day when I do shave and cut my hair, I'd like to do a show and then just kind of take it off mid-stage. Mid-show. Just go, you know what, I'm tired of wearing this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Pull off a whole mask and I'd be Brian Bates. That's what we should do.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, uh, I opened for Dominique one time and she would do that. I would announce her name and my wife said that she saw Dominique, like Dominique, like was in the back of the room, like poured something in her drink, mixed it up, took her time. I had no idea. I'm like, Dominique.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I used to watch him on comic view all the time and, uh, and then I, when he came to Zanies, when I first moved here, I went and saw him at Zanies and it was like, man, he just murders. He kills so hard. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I wasn't really prepped that we'd be doing two intros here.


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[Assistant] I mean, I've worked the road with Chris all over the place. That would murder for him every time. I mean, he might not even have the best set the whole time, but at the end, that would murder. I mean, he had a little dance that he did and it was like every time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, I watched these, uh, hotel conference room comedy shows we would do. And I mean, it would just, he would just leave.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I love that. Yeah. Good stuff. Yeah. I mean that, that closer that he had, I mean it was a killer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] James Gregory always said that there's more people that do brain surgery than do stand up comedy for a living.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I don't know if that's true, but uh. Sounds good. It may be.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's what I'm saying. But I mean, I think that's what it is. He's saying like that. Do this well, professionally. Right. More, more brain surgeons.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] A bad brain surgery kills somebody. Yeah, you can't just, there's not like open mic brain surgery, you know? Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Maybe there are people that are hard up for brain surgery. They're like, I'll let anybody try.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I was going to say about, you know, you're talking about set list of, uh, of people doing it. It's like, you always think of these people as like legends and, and, you know,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Rodney Dangerfield, but it's like at some point, you know, they were real nervous about doing a comedy show. They were like, you know, he has these famous Johnny Carson things where he's sitting on there and it's like, but probably, you know, that was worked out a bit and probably, uh, Rodney Dangerfield was nervous.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Doing that. Now we watch it and we go, this guy's amazing. And he is, but he was probably nervous before he went out there. You know?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he said, uh, no respect and it's probably because he probably was not getting a lot of respect for a long time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Or maybe a currency. You can, uh, pay for things with leaves. Oh. Are you still needing more? Well, I don't, I don't need anymore, but I'll take them.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] People wanna put their address, they live in Nashville and they wanna put their address down. I'll come pick em up.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, you know, when you mulch them down, if you run over them with a lawnmower, they really kind of go down to nothing. So you can use a lot. And I have nine acres out in McMinnville that I can spread leaves out on. I'm all about it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I have had more success in the neighborhood though. People are, uh, giving me the leaves. Word's getting out. Yeah. And so I'm not, uh, I'm not being a, you know, like my neighbor next to me, let me rake his leaves. The one that didn't want you to? No, no, a different, different guy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. Well, it's, uh, yeah, I mean, actually he had really nice grass.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, he said thank you to me too, but I, I was thankful that he gave me the leaves.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, you know, they only come in the fall. So, you know, I just thought I got a lot out there. It's like, you know, in Tennessee, we've got a lot of hard clay, right? So it's not good for planting things. You gotta, if you can build up a little topsoil that helps. So that's what the leaves do. They break down over time.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In a year, you can, you know, you can do it. You can get a good layer going.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, I got, yeah, clover, wildflowers. I want it to be real, uh, bee friendly, uh, rabbit friendly.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I got, I'm gonna do like the back half. A lot of wildflowers, you know. So the front, I do want some lawn for my daughter to be able to run around.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, you know, they could share some, you know, my daughter likes that too though, cause we get butterflies and we got bees and we got, uh, you know, she likes the rabbits. She chases the rabbits around. We got birds. I mean, that's fun. It's a good time out there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, you know, people spray for mosquitoes. They spend all this money on pesticides or mosquitoes and bats will just eat them. Yeaah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] But I'm also, you know, I'm not talking to a lot of people about it yet. So words getting out. I'm sure people will message and let us know they have bad houses. Okay.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, but I mean, they're allowing chickens and stuff like that. It's like, if you're going to allow that, you gotta let me have bats.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Even though I would really love to have some owls. I think that'd be a lot of fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, they'll kill rodents and stuff, so. So you could have both.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. How big is this house? It's not very big, you know, and then the bad bird box. Yeah. But like a slightly bigger bird box. And then the bad house is a real thin thing.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. You're getting the worst bets. Yeah. Yeah. Getting the ne'er do well. Yeah. They can't, yeah. They can't even stick with the family.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Alberta is a real like ranching.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, part of the country, like I think they do a lot of, that's where the culture wall is from, that country singer.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] No, no, he's just cultural. The Canadian accent. I'm like an old man with, the Facebook, you know.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I did, uh, I did a theater show in Chattanooga at the Walker theater. Sold out. It was great. A lot of fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Uh, saw some old friends in Chattanooga, Eric Lonez came out and hang out, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And then I did Bowling Green. Uh, Theatre and Bowling Green, The Sky Pack.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Was awesome, lot of fun. They gave me, I got a gift basket from a candle place and I forgot the name of it and I meant to talk about it. And a guy gave me this hat off his head, uh. Is that Nate on it?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I did an hour and 25 minutes at that show. And I'm like, that's what I'm talking about. I'm, I'm in the theater vibe now. I could easily be up there for two hours. You let your opener do three minutes. Yeah. I mean, that's where I'm, that's where I'm at. I want someone to just go out and bring me out.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I probably should just, you know, sell enough tickets to do two shows and that would satisfy it. But, uh, yeah, it feels good. I mean, I'm out there.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] In Chattanooga, I got my old friend from Charleston, Vince Fabra, to come and do a set too. And, uh, that was fun.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Do a, you know, have a buddy that kind of started comedy with me, but he doesn't really do comedy a ton now. He's getting back into it, but like he started comedy with me where we would work these, uh, road shows where no one would show up and then we would split the money. And now he's opening for me at a sold out theater show. Oh my, that's pretty awesome.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I wanted to say though at the Bowling Green Show we had a driver.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We had a, I know, I can't stop. We had a driver pick us up from the hotel and take us to the venue and she was driving pretty wild. And me and Alec Parent, the guy opening for me, we both got a little car sick.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] On the way, I mean, I get vertigo and stuff now. I'm like, I could never do an amusement park. But he got real sick.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And like, so he was supposed to do 25. He ended up doing 15.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And he was like, I could see him on stage. He put his coat on. I mean, he was struggling. He was like, he's a pretty high energy guy and he was real low energy. He was trying, he was fumbling on his jokes and he would look over at me and make eye contact and I'd just be dying back there. I mean, I loved it. And, uh, yeah, he was struggling. How long was the drive? Eight minutes.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And it did, and it did you that? I mean, I got a little, I was like, Oh gosh, what's going on here? And then, but I was fine. Were you sitting in the front? Uh, yeah. Well that, the front. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I try to give people a dirty look when I know they don't live in the cul-de-sac but yet they're driving down there. I try to give them a dirty look like what are you doing down here?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] How's a year been is a good question in like March, but in November, that's a weird question. Might be tough. Yeah. How's your year been? You mean the whole thing?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I think it really, it's a question that would catch people off guard. People are ready, a lot of people are ready for a small talk answer with how's your day going? Maybe even how's your week? Then how's a year going?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Right into talk to me about the development of your family.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] That's how you recover. Yeah, you go. Oh, I have a family.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Somebody yelled out a joke to me in Bowling Green. One of my older jokes that I don't do at all anymore. And I was like...


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I was like, I'd like to do this joke for them, but it took me a minute. I went through other jokes while trying to think of how this joke went and I did get it and I did it, but it took me a minute. It's like.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't just know all the jokes. So that's how you get into an hour. Were you taking requests? I did do that one joke. Yeah. I mean that joke was like, that was there. It was like a minute. I mean, yeah, I mean, I'm ready.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I got lots of jokes. I mean, it's like, I, I don't know. I love, a theater world is fairly new to me and I'm, uh,


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I went with a comic on the roll one time, Jim Seward, and he put, uh, he had, uh, pastrami in a cooler in the car. And every time he would open, I love pastrami, but every time he would open this cooler, it would just fill the car. It was making me so sick. I'm like, this is disgusting. Like of all the meats to put in a cooler, you put pastrami in here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, the Charlotte airport has a Popeyes chicken in it and people buy that and bring it on a plane. And I love fried chicken, but I'm like, it's tough on a plane. It's a risky move. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well Thomas, this is great. This seems much easier than bats.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Peacock's pretty fun. Peacock is fun and who couldn't use some extra peacock feathers? Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, this is a very small house. It's just that like, it's like the wood is really close together and that's what bats like to be able to get in there and hang down.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't think so. I think a couple of bats could eat a ton of mosquitoes. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I just am not really into pesticides these days. You know? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Forgot where you came from. Yeah, I'm trying to go pesticides.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I'm into that. I mean, I, you know, if I had some land, I would be into some peacocks and some guineas. What's a guinea here? I don't, I think it's just a- I think it's a male peacock.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Oh, right. I think it's a different kind of species altogether. I mean, it's a, it's a bird, but.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I mean, that's the way to go. I've not set up the worm farm yet, but the, I do have the tub now, so it's, it's on its way.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, it's unloaded. I unloaded a cat-staring tub out of the back of my truck by myself.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They don't make it very clear what the deal is. So often I take the frames to the counter and I go, I just want to make sure these are on the buy one, get one free list in there. And, and, but in the back of my mind, I'm like, I know they are, but I don't want you ringing them up and not being, they go, Oh, well not these.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And I'm like, well, not these, why you got signs all over the whole area?


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You know, they'll just remember that I did this when I wasn't famous. Yeah. You know, and don't, and don't make it like a fame thing. It's like, no, I've always been difficult in a retail store.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I've been into, I worked in retail stores too much. You know, I've been, I know how the employees are in there from working side by side with them. It's like, don't, don't play these games with me.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You think those kids got their parents to drive them to school after that or they were still like, I wish I could take you, but I still have to work.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's too bad for the kids. I mean, the dad, yeah, but it's like he drug his kids along.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah. And you go to prison in 1976 and then you come out now, like the world has completely changed your life. Oh, different place. You won't. Yeah. Yeah.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] You think at this point, it's only better. Imagine what you thought the breakfast buffet would be.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I'll do the swim. I'd like to train a little bit, but I also, if I do the swim and get embarrassed by other swimmers, I need Brian to be out on a professional soccer field.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] As long as I get to see Brian on a professional soccer field.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Like if this whole thing came down to Brian is actually a great soccer player.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] See, this is creepy to me too. I never really thought about that with octopus, but that's pretty creepy.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Well, I'm ready for you to pay me my 20 bucks here soon. I mean, that's coming. People said it already happened.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] They say Octopus can... How does she know which one? Pregnates.


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[Assistant] Yeah, and I think if you laugh a lot, if you're around people that make you laugh, you can really take for granted that some people aren't in those environments where they're not laughing a lot. So really, they really do need a comedy show.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you are a big Nateland fan, you know that we've been drinking AG1 for a couple of years.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] We all started drinking AG1 daily and really feel like we're doing something good to cover all our nutritional bases. That's because AG1 is a foundational nutrition supplement that supports your body's universal needs like gut optimization, stress management, and immune support.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Since 2010, AG1 has led the future of foundational nutrition, continuously refining their formula to create a smarter, better way to elevate your baseline health.


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[Assistant] I replaced my multivitamin with AG1 because it's much easier to mix one scoop of powder in water once a day than to remember to take a bunch of different things. It takes under a minute and costs less than $3 a day and it tastes great.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Since we travel so often, we use single serving travel packs so we never have to miss a day when we are on the road. You can get monthly, free monthly delivery to make it even easier. It is a lot to take a bunch of different things.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] AG1 is the supplement we trust to provide the support my body needs daily and that's why they've been a partner of Nate Land for so long.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you want to take ownership of your health, it starts with AG1. Try AG1 and get a free one year supply of vitamin D3K2 and five free AG1 travel packs with your first purchase. Go to drinkag1.com slash Nate. That's drinkag1.com slash Nate.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Check it out. It is a lot. When Aaron laughs, it seems like I'm not serious, but it is a lot to take a bunch of different things, but you can just mix it up and drink it and get your DK


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Get your D3K2 supplements. I mean, that's what I'm talking about. Yep.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] It's relatable because you know, we all use it. That's right. Unless you live in an area where they don't have them. But you still use the bathroom.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And what those people want most is for us to know about it. They're like, yeah, we don't have it, but we're still not going to have it, but it's good if you know that we don't have it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If they laid out the plan, they were like, all right, in this area, all we need is this much money and we can get it built. Then we could all donate to there. And then we'll say, all right, is it done? And then if it's done, then you can go, all right, well, let's start doing this every year. Yeah, I'm with you.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Look, on this podcast, I, I noticed, like, you guys- He was brown, would kill for six days. He goes, sign me up. Where can I get six? I've done that since I've been here. But on the podcast, you guys rarely drink your whole mug of water. Every time I drink the whole mug of water, Nate often brings a refill of water. So I bet you're not properly hydrated.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] I don't do it for a reason. Yeah. It's just sometimes you're like, I want to make sure I only pee four times a day. Yeah. Doesn't go. How you pee a lot of times? 20 times a day.


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[Assistant] I know I have friends that don't, they tell me they don't drink water.


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[Assistant] That's what I like. And when I would have cigars, I haven't had cigars in a month, I would have a, like a ginger ale, nicotine free right now. Oh yea? It feels good.


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[Assistant] Yeah, they're like, we're gonna go ahead and change this.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Yeah, that's what I think. You're, you're like, uh, your crapper, you invented it and then they start calling it a crapper and then you're like, oh, I don't want my last name to be this anymore.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] This was invented in the 1500s and it wasn't until Tom, Thomas Craffer came along that it really got revolutionized.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] If you're living in the South, it's tough to debate the AC thing. Cause I always thought, why would people live, why would they settle up in Minnesota and Wisconsin with it being so cold? But then I realized like before the air conditioner, why would you settle down South?


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[Assistant] My grandmother didn't have air conditioner in her house in like the nineties and in Alabama. We would go to visit her.


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[Assistant] And you just have the windows open with an oscillating fan.


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[Assistant] Oh yeah. See, I would think the middle one, especially if there's three, I guess if there's three urinals, like you don't want to walk up to the middle one.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] So I would think that one would be the one that would get used the least.


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[Assistant] Concerned about the cleanliness of a urine, although necessarily not touching the urine.


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[Assistant] Bad bathrooms. Would you say that was an unsafe urinal? I felt unsafe in here.


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[Assistant] Toil paper also I've heard has bad chemicals in it.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] And that part of your body is very absorbent, so you take in these bad chemicals.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] What kind of bad chemicals? I don't know, just dyes and bleaches. Well, dyes.


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[Assistant] Did they die at white toilet papers died white? There's other Kim. Yes. Bleached.


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[Assistant] Bamboo toilet paper, and it's not supposed to have that in there.


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[Assistant] Bamboo toilet paper. What color is it? It's still white, but it's...


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[Assistant] Yeah, I mean I got into it cause I'm like, you know what, I'm trying to not take in a lot of chemicals. I don't know what's going on out here, but I'm trying to be chemical free out here.


[User] Please transcribe this text

[Assistant] Not that hard. I mean, it's better than cheap toilet paper, but it's, yeah, it's not.


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[Assistant] It's like healthy food where you're like, you're eating and you're like, I wish it tastes as good as unhealthy food, but it's better for me. It's that kind of thing where you're like, I wish this were chocolate, but.


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[Assistant] These are, this is really easy too because you just do it on an app. You don't have to load it in the frame itself. It's just on an app.


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[Assistant] And my wife likes to put up frames around, uh, pictures around the house to whoever's visiting. So it kind of looks like we always have those up, but it's like, you know, this makes it super easy.


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[Assistant] Off 65 though, one, I think it's 65. Uh, there's a place that advertises best, uh, you know, best restroom on the interstate.


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[Assistant] The other 25% are in their 80s and 90s I guess. I thought you said met using their phones. Admit to using their phones.


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[Assistant] I did get one, but I don't remember if it had a hole or not. I can report back to you.


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[Assistant] Yeah, over the front. Where it comes down, not over the back. Yes.


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[Assistant] I don't think people like it under, I think the 25% don't even think about it.


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[Assistant] Yeah, well, I'm off this weekend too, but next weekend, uh, CB live in, uh, Arizona and, uh, what is that? Uh, it's Phoenix, right? It's Phoenix, but it's a little Scottsdale. Yeah. Great place. And then I'll be Friday, Saturday, Sunday in Tempe at the Tempe Improv. So get some tickets. It'll be great.


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[Assistant] You know, she was originally scheduled to come right before Halloween. That's what we're going to talk about.


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[Assistant] Yeah. It was, uh, cause you were single then too and probably getting hit on a lot.


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[Assistant] I mean, so many YouTube stars, they just...


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[Assistant] They hit for a while and then they just can't maintain it. You've put out so many specials and I still travel with you and you still sell out everywhere. So.


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[Assistant] A lot is the answer. I'm honored to middle for both of you. What about me?


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[Assistant] Yeah, he played for the 86 Mets and that was, that was my team.


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[Assistant] I do. He was in left field one time and they, somebody hit a ball down the left field line and he caught it with his bare hand.


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[Assistant] I do listen to his podcast because some of his best stories that I bring up on here come from that.


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[Assistant] She never said his name, she said it was a very, I took that part out, very famous comics podcast.


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[Assistant] That's been a few episodes ago where we were talking about cell phones and how there used to be certain times with roaming and all that. Oh yeaah.


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[Assistant] Yeah. She's been doing it for a long time. And you personally know her. From my TV news days, yeah.


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[Assistant] There's one like if school's out or whatever or anything going to Williamson County Schools for the, that's who we'd have to talk to.


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[Assistant] Pen. Yeah, that's what I call it. We say it the same way. Pen. Yeah. How do you say P N G U I N?


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[Assistant] Yeaah, that's definitely that. Maybe, what sound do you think? Cause, hm, we'll have an H in them.


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[Assistant] What do you think that is? I think he's saying what you just said. Oh, so he just misspelled it?


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[Assistant] Well, why don't you tell Angela, cause I think she'd be excited to hear about rocket money.


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[Assistant] But you were telling me a story about how when the directors were like, look, the scene's over, keep rolling, we're going to riff.


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[Assistant] It's a great family movie like for, like you and Harper I think would enjoy.


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[Assistant] Co-star of a movie that's very similar to Hallmark I think though, The Resurrection of Gavin Stone.


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[Assistant] We are talking about sketch comedy. Uh, so, Angela, you mentioned briefly, but you were also a member on MADtv.


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[Assistant] I was surprised, it ran for 14 seasons. I would have never guessed that. That's a long...


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[Assistant] They're probably some. Yeaah. Yeaah. Yeaah. Yeaah. Did you, uh, did you guys grow up in a favorite sketch comedy show?


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[Assistant] Me too, I thought you were going to make fun of me, but I was going to say that.


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[Assistant] There's a, there's a sketch where he plays a dentist and he puts, uh, what's it called? The Nova King. And he keeps accidentally doing it to himself. And it's, I still think it holds up. It's one of the best sketches ever.


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[Assistant] You, uh, putting this out on a previous episode, you and Dusty born the same week and your children born the same week.


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[Assistant] Did you have a favorite sketch show growing up?