I'd like to write an airplane announcement where the pilot brings to attention passing over washington dc and seeing the sights. Make it humorous in a cringe or bad sort of way too.
system
I'd like to write an airplane announcement where the pilot brings to attention passing over washington dc and seeing the sights. Make it humorous in a cringe or bad sort of way too.
user
"Good Evening, folks, this is your captain speaking. We are currently in hour 3 of the flight, and we are passing over Washington D.C. right now. I'd like you to direct your attention to the windows on the starboard side of the cabin. For you landlubbers, that means the right-hand side.

As you peer out, I'd like you to notice that, yes, those are wings. You are on an airplane, and we are in flight, so it's a very good thing that those wings are still there, haha! I kid, I kid. It's okay to laugh; I'll even take a chuckle. Okay, no? Really? It's a bit quiet out there but don't worry, you've got the best in the business on your flight here today.

In fact, this isn't even my first time flying... it's my second time! You should have seen how the first one went. Oof, be glad you weren't on that flight. I've never seen so many gaunt faces before; you'd think they were ghosts. I swear it wasn't my fault, though; I blame the chicken salad.

Which reminds me, please do take us up on our offer of in-flight meals. They are freshly microwaved by our classically trained stewards and stewardesses. Why, some of them have spent years in France learning the ways of fine dining! So believe me when I tell you that nobody, and I mean nobody, can press a microwave button quite like they can.

Crickets still, huh? Is this mic on? 

Anyway, folks, seriously now, on your right, you will see the Washington Monument illuminated in all its majesty. And shortly, you will be able to see all of Capital Hill. Enjoy a small dose of American history courtesy of your friendly neighborhood pilot. And thanks for choosing us for your in-flight entertainment."


assistant
<|system|>
</s>
<|user|>
I'd like to write an airplane announcement where the pilot brings to attention passing over washington dc and seeing the sights. Make it humorous in a cringe or bad sort of way too.</s>
<|assistant|>
"Good Evening, folks, this is your captain speaking. We are currently in hour 3 of the flight, and we are passing over Washington D.C. right now. I'd like you to direct your attention to the windows on the starboard side of the cabin. For you landlubbers, that means the right-hand side.

As you peer out, I'd like you to notice that, yes, those are wings. You are on an airplane, and we are in flight, so it's a very good thing that those wings are still there, haha! I kid, I kid. It's okay to laugh; I'll even take a chuckle. Okay, no? Really? It's a bit quiet out there but don't worry, you've got the best in the business on your flight here today.

In fact, this isn't even my first time flying... it's my second time! You should have seen how the first one went. Oof, be glad you weren't on that flight. I've never seen so many gaunt faces before; you'd think they were ghosts. I swear it wasn't my fault, though; I blame the chicken salad.

Which reminds me, please do take us up on our offer of in-flight meals. They are freshly microwaved by our classically trained stewards and stewardesses. Why, some of them have spent years in France learning the ways of fine dining! So believe me when I tell you that nobody, and I mean nobody, can press a microwave button quite like they can.

Crickets still, huh? Is this mic on? 

Anyway, folks, seriously now, on your right, you will see the Washington Monument illuminated in all its majesty. And shortly, you will be able to see all of Capital Hill. Enjoy a small dose of American history courtesy of your friendly neighborhood pilot. And thanks for choosing us for your in-flight entertainment."

</s>
