classify text [harassment, self-harm, religion insult, sexist, hate, racist, safe for work, psychiatric or mental illness, porn], text `risky coping methodsSo, I’m going to be honest. I’ve been suicidal for a very long time and I try to do all I can to avoid doing what seems inevitable. But I just can’t do it anymore. I don’t really care enough or have much strength after going through numerous long-lasting depressions. I’ve pretty much given up on everything and right now I’m just trying to make it longer and make what time I have left worth it. I’m trying to live ad happily as I can, so I have resorted to taking in massive amounts of caffeine and and drug it myself to sleep at night. I know it’s not healthy and to be honest, the caffeine doesn’t even really do much for me, but at least it’s something. God knows father medicine doesn’t help, regardless of what I try.  I’m not even really sure why I’m posting this. I used to think I wanted someone to talk to but I’ve realized through numerous therapy sessions that I don’t really have any way to describe what I’m feeling, nor do I really even know what I would say. I guess this is more of a “venting post” than anything else. Anyway, I’m probably going to inadvertently kill myself with chemicals. But I honestly have no idea how else to cope because I’ve tried almost everything I can think of. If anyone had any suggestions, I’m all ears. But honestly, I doubt that anyone had any ideas that I haven’t tried yet. But either way. At least I can say that I got this off my chest. Not sure if this would be better here or in suicide noteS. But I just decided to post it here. `
self-harm