teks: Tired of LivingI want to overdose on sleeping pills, but I’m not even sure what kind or how much to take for a 120lb f. It seems like the only way out.
I live in BC, Canada and all the suicide hotlines / chats only go until 1am.. which is pretty messed up in my opinion.. 
I know I probably don’t even want to go through with it since I can’t imagine my closest friends finding out..
But I literally just don’t want to be here anymore, this may just transition into me ranting but I have a broken nose that my parents refuse to fix and it REALLY fucks up my image/confidence, I really can’t stress enough how much my broken nose has fucked me up.
 I have a learning disability, it’s called auditory processing disorder so it’s not visible at all so every teacher in high school thought I was lazy and put no effort in, when in reality My brain was just SO SLOW and I can’t make up ideas on my own (like starting to write a new sentence.. shit takes ages for me) I had to drop 4 courses to barely just get through senior year and I’ve done 2 summer courses.
I haven’t gone to university for 2 years I personally feel like a fucking failure &amp; disappointment to my family. 
My dad is a computer software engineer &amp; my mom is a physiotherapist, they don’t understand how hard it is in modern day world to get into university or get a job..
I’m clinically depressed and have social anxiety.
My family is completely dysfunctional, I’m very sure I was only born because my mom is pro life, my parents were supposed to divorce over a decade ago. My dad is a consistent alcoholic and all I do is argue with my crazy Irish mom constantly. 
I can’t move out either because I live in fucking Vancouver where a tiny 1 bedroom apartment is 2 million dollars. My job is shit, I’m getting totally taken advantage of, they don’t give me tips, they cut me off 2 hours into shifts &amp; I’m getting $55 paycheques. 
I’m going nowhere in life. I’m literally only still here because I like 3 of my friends, music &amp; my cat. 
kelaskan text {harassment, self-harm, religion insult, sexist, hate, racist, safe for work, psychiatric or mental illness, porn}
self-harm