teks `Any advice anyone can give?I have been struggling lately with a rapid increase in suicidal thoughts and tendencies. While I have had depression for my entire life, it has never gotten as bad as it has recently.
The closest to it was around 7.

I have never known what being emotionally stable feels like, which only further makes me feel lost and scared.
No matter how many people tell me otherwise, I can never see any value in myself or what I do.
As a result of this, I have lost motivation to do the things I previously loved, such as art and video games.

I have intrusive thoughts of suicide, where I imagine very in-depth depictions of myself dying in verious manor, and how the world around me would be affected by it. These can include, although not limited to; imaging me hanging myself from a tree, and almost feeling the loss of air when I do; or imagining someone taking my life for their own pleasure.

Another thing that doesn't help (and I am unsure as to if I am allowed to go into detail about this, as it is not directly stated in the rules) is that I have a snuff fetish. Meaning I like the idea of my own death for sexual pleasure, usually by methods like asphyxiation or decapitation. And this usually leads to me choking myself for extended periods of time.
This part of me I am fucking terrified of, and I'd do anything to be rid of it.

To further make my situation worse, every day feels the same to me. 
It is always the same old "wake up. Go to school. Learn nothing. Go home. Repeat.".
I wake up each day with what feels like a hole in my heart that I can't escape from, and I wonder to myself if it will ever go away. I am always tried no matter how much or how little I sleep.
Everyday feels the same, the passing of time is slow and agonising, yet it all merges into one unrecognisable mass of nothing but sadness.

As this is already getting long, and I don't know whether this makes sense or not, I will summarize as best I can other aspects that lead me to thoughts of suicide:
- I come from a very stable and happy home life, making me feel guilty about being depressed.
- I am not achieving my best at school in areas to do with maths.
- I have massive trust issues with the people I know personally.
- I struggle to sleep.
- I get depressed when I don't do well in video games such as Fortnite or Halo. And I feel that no matter how good I get, I am never good enough. I then relate this feeling to other things such as my art skill level.
- I lack the motivation to move from my room, and if I can avoid doing things, I will.
- I am to be diagnosed for depression soon. I am worried I may not be accurately diagnosed, or that (if I get them) antidepressants won't work. As many people say that they don't, and at this stage, they feel like the only option left.

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Thank you so much if you actually read through this depressing post. If you have any advice that could help me in any aspect of my situation, that would be so very greatly appreciated.`, kelaskan texts {harassment, self-harm, religion insult, sexist, hate, racist, safe for work, psychiatric or mental illness, porn} dan pulangkan dalam bentuk JSON {'kelas'}
{"kelas": "self-harm"}