classify text [gangguan, kebencian, porno, penyakit psikiatri atau mental, sifat perkauman, penghinaan agama, selamat untuk bekerja, mencederakan diri sendiri, seksis], text `I am a worthless teenagerThis is my silent scream for help, but right now I am not hoping, not anymore, I expect this to just pass away in the winds of new threads, because I know there is a lot of people who are in most need of help.
But anyway, I can't write this on my Journal nor my main account because of fear of somebody finding out.
The thing is, this is not the first time I go throught this kind of shit. I've had depression, I went to a psychologist, it worked out pretty well, but what I haven't told to anybody is that I still have missing pieces. It's been two years since my first and last attempt of suicide, but the last year I went almost the first semester with thoughs of suicide, that I am a worthless piece of crap and nobody will ever miss my existance, Why would ANYONE miss a person like me? A person who failed to the expectations, a person who is neither interesting or attractive. Nowdays I think I have no future or anything. I've done everything I could to improve myself but I always think that is going to do nothing, I get desperate and frustrated and sometimes crying myself in the nights because those kind of thoughs, sometimes the worst thing about them is that I believe them the most than the good ones. The thoughs of suicide are coming back, most of it because of the reason of "What is left anyways, I fucked up and I see no bright future in me", and the only reason for not ending my life is my mother, as she is my last bastion of hope I can have. "This is the age to try everything we can" those are words I heard my entire teenager life and I get angry because since I was a child I have problems socializing or people find me creepy. I am so just sad and desperate right now, and crying with force. 
`
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