classify text {gangguan, kebencian, porno, penyakit psikiatri atau mental, sifat perkauman, penghinaan agama, selamat untuk bekerja, mencederakan diri sendiri, seksis}, text `I can hardly move.I'm supposed to be supporting my wife. I'm supposed to be doing a job that, for whatever reason, I hate. Worst of all though... I'm supposed to be getting better.

I finally got my shit together and started seeing a therapist, met with a psychologist and got a prescription for some anti depressants and I was doing better. So much better.

But now I'm not.

I can't get out of bed. I'm afraid that if I stand up I'll walk to the closet, pick up the pistol and shoot myself in the back of the head. I literally had difficulty picking up my phone from the floor because instead of just picking up the phone I wanted to grab the cord right next to it and strangle myself.

It hurts. The fact that I know I could be developing a great life for my family but I'm too depressed and broken to do it. The fact that I KNOW, and have known since sophomore year, that I will die by my own hand eventually. It hurts knowing all the people that I'll leave behind. My little sister. My wife. My parents my family my friends all of them left behind because I couldn't put on a fucking smile and get over myself.

I just want to be done. The only way I can think of being done is by dying. I'm such a failure.

I can't believe I'm here again. I thought I was okay. I'm not.`
mencederakan diri sendiri