teks `In Need of Advice, I Did Something Really Bad and Will Probably Go to Hell for It.Before I start,  let me say I'm a 19 year old female who has my own suicidal thoughts. Which only makes this situation worse. I'm sorry if this post isn't allowed. 

My littlest sister is 13. She's attempted suicide before and I'm very glad she's alive. I stayed with her in the hospital for the first week until I was forced to go back to school. 

I live with my grandmother and two of my three sisters live with my mom. It's Easter vacation and I came to visit. Things were great the first few days,  but then for the past two days both of my sisters have been really mean to me. Saying I'm not allowed in their rooms, that I smell gross right after I shower,  saying I'm a slob even though I've been picking up my trash,  etc. Just making me feel really unwanted. 

So today my littlest sister and I got in an argument and I kept getting angrier until I told her I wished she'd died in that hospital and that she'd kill herself. I regretted it as soon as I said it and went to shower and cool my head. 

I'm not excusing my actions because as a suicidal person I know what I did was wrong and it was evil of me to do it. She's currently in my other sisters room crying. I did apologize,  but I know sorry doesn't change anything. 

Yesterday I decided I wouldn't visit again since they clearly don't want me around, and now there's no way that'd change given that I just told a suicidal person to kill herself. 

But I wanted to know if there's any advice on making things better. I leave on Friday and I'd at least like to let her know I didn't mean it if there's a way she'll believe me since I doubt she believed the apology.`, kelaskan teks guna labels [harassment, self-harm, religion insult, sexist, hate, racist, safe for work, psychiatric or mental illness, porn]
self-harm