teks: hello againhi, i posted in this sub a few months ago. during those months, i thought that for the first time in my life, happiness could be a permanent thing. i was very wrong. i’m contemplating ending things soon, and have been for the past few weeks.

my boyfriend and mother keep urging me to go to school. it angers me because i’m clearly not in a stable mindset. i’ve been having panic attacks the past few days and i’ve been sobbing nonstop. no one asks me what’s wrong and instead choose to badger me into going to school. they think i’m giving up on myself.

i hate that people view depression as an excuse for laziness. do they not realize that the last thing i want to do is be lazy? i would give everything to be a motivated, active participant in society. i miss my younger self so much, back when i worked as hard as i could and tried my best in everything.

i’m so tired and done with life. i’ve been dependent on others for emotional stability since i was a child and i’ve realized that i can’t live without that dependency. i’m basically an emotional leech. scum.

i’d rather end it all so people can stop wasting their time and energy on a useless piece of shit. i’m not worth anything to anyone and death seems like a relief to me.
kelaskan text {harassment, self-harm, religion insult, sexist, hate, racist, safe for work, psychiatric or mental illness, porn}
self-harm