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teks: Need someone to talk and support meI just hit my head several times. I feel dizzy and going to throw up. One side of me don't want to die, but another side of me have suicidal tendency everytime i'm depressed. I just need random stranger to talk and support me. I've talked to some of my friends and only 1 really care about my current condition but ofc he can't make me feel relieved, i haven't contacted local psychiatrist/doctor, i'm to shy and short in cash to pay them.

I have fear of rejection but i want in a romantic relationship with someone, the last relationship i have is 7 years ago until she left me and make me depressed. I have tried several times for 7 years to find new love and always end up they creeped out of me, every single time it end, the impact is getting worse, i feel like i'm not normal, tried to talk to some 'friend' but overall they don't really care, their gesture said "I have my own problem too", " You're such a pussy", i feel so rejected and suicidal, feels like nobody accepting my existence. Currently in love with somebody and i'm affraid it will end with she creeped out of me again and i hate myself to fall for her. I lost focus on my work or anything that interest me before. It's my birthday today and i woke up hitting my head.
self-harm