St. Tib’s Day exists only to keep the calendar synchronized with Earth’s rotation around the sun and should be celebrated occasionally and vigorously.
Celebrating pentagons, pentagrams, and other pentilaterals. The law of the five-day celebration is never wrong.
Celebrating the use of tools. Use them, make them, give them as gifts. A person can do anything with the right tool.
Back in the old days, the world was on many conflicting systems of keeping time. While three-quarters time might prevail in one area, elsewhere it was spare time or springtime or due time or ragtime.
On this day Discordians protest this confusing state of affairs by telling anyone who asks, any time, that it is 5 o’clock—because, somewhere, it is. If they check with another source or, say, note that the sun is directly overhead, we explain we only said that it was 5 o’clock because it is Daytime.
Discordian Eternal Time solves the whole problem of confusion about time by making it, in fact, 5 o’clock everywhere, always. But, unfortunately, most societies would rather do things the complicated way.
Beware the Dreaded Illuminati on Eye Days. Our ancient foes stole Eye Days from us as a time to commit particularly heinous and bloodthirsty acts upon any Discordian they could capture. Make sure your membership paperwork in the AISB is up-to-date and be ready to produce it on demand. In addition, to ensure the readiness of fellow Discordians, pretend to be an inspection agent with the AISB and make surprise checks on their membership paperwork
In celebration of everything incorrect. A perfect day to challenge a long-held belief.
Celebration of the Apostle Dr. Van Van Mojo. Use as many obscure Discordian references as possible. Good places for this are parks, buses, and city council meetings.
Let go of everything that doesn’t make your life awesome!
It’s a holiday with deep roots touching unconsumption, the slow movement, downshifting, and voluntary simplicity. Unlike many holidays, it doesn’t involve obligations or expense or overblown expectations of specialness. It does not require us to interact with people whom we do not wish to interact with. In fact, it doesn’t require us to do anything. Discardia is celebrated by letting go of what doesn’t add value to your life—whether physical object, habit, or emotional baggage—and replacing it with what makes your world truer to your essential self. The core concept is this: If we continually discard what doesn’t help us, we’ll be left with more of what does—more space, energy, and time to make our lives even better.