DD is 2 yo. Lately she has been throwing tantrums or just refusing to do things that need to get done (put clothes on, brush teeth etc.).
We have tried everything we could think of
- giving choices (this is just received with "no, no, no")
- ultimatums - "we will read a book when you put your clothes on"
- nagation - "you don't want to take your jammy off"
- ignoring - just walking away, and ignoring her - this can turn into a full blown tantrum which can last 45 min or so...
- trying to talk about feelings - she hates that - as soon as you ask her how she is feeling she cries even more
- distractions - this works sometimes, but we need to go through 100 things to find one that will work - it is getting pretty tiering
- telling her her behavoiur makes us sad
We don't know what to do any more. We don't want to spank and are not even thinking about it, but we want to be peacefull and happy. What can we do?
We also tried to think of what the reason might be for all these tantrums, and it usually is when something doesn't happen her way, for example she doesn't want a Micky mouse waffle that morning, or we won't pick up a book that she dropped and is by her feet, or won't feed her.
This started few months ago, but seems like it has gotten worse lately. She does have a month old sister that she adores, so I am sure she is feeling a bit neglected. We are trying to do out best to spend as much time as possible with her - one on one, as well as everybody together etc. She does not seem to be jaelous of her sister, she always asks about her and wants to play with her and kiss and hug her and give her toys...
I would love some advice or some good book recommendations of how to deal with 2 year olds and their tantrums. I read "Emotianal life of a toddler" which was great, but I need more books that would help us.