text: In Catholic school, we were taught, over and over, to be more patient, that greater patience is higher virtue. Perhaps this message was right for some, maybe even for 90%, of the squirmy, demanding kids in the desks in the overcrowded classrooms (50 students sometimes). But for some of us, such as myself, this was the wrong message, but I took it to heart. Looking back, I should have been much less patient with my parents, who kept me isolated, made me amputate myself in many ways for being different from their vision of a family member who will not bring the family shame, threatened me for being creative (I was told many times that I have so many ideas that some day I will "crack up" and have to be "put away.") I should have discarded patience and risen up, demanding over and over to have playdates and friends, being allowed to pursue the person I was born to be. But always back then I was patient with my parents, always hoping for their enlightenment. Patience is not virtuous per se.