'It was my intention today to write a blog post discussing the issue of female deacons. It was not to be.'
Sorry, Pat, but you lost me right here.  Surely any half-competent journalist could figure out how to tie female deacons and male footballers together?  I can't tell you how, but them I'm not a journalist.  Maybe there's a footballer's wife who wants to be a deacon, or who already is.  Use your contacts, for crying out loud!
Anyway, what I don't like about American football is this:  it's too bloody specialised.  Why do you need one lot of players to do offence and a completely different lot to do defence?  That's crazy.  The money they get paid, they can do both.  I understand it was like that in the olden days.  At the risk of sounding like a neo-Pelagian rigid legalist, I say:  bring them days back!
Also, they shouldn't be stopping play every time someone gets tackled.  Everyone dusts themselves off then goes off for a little chat.  Keep playing, like they do in rugby.