Let's be real. You have no idea what he's doing when he's home with his wife. People will lie to have their cake and eat it too. Y'all need to handle your business at home before you go trapesing around with other people. If he's willing to toss a commitment aside by making excuses of a "volatile relationship" then he's willing to make excuses again, just like you. Forget some other guy and own up to your problems at home and if divorce is the answer then so be it, but dont use someone else as an excuse. Once thats done find a man who has handled his business before you bother trying to date him. Stop making choices that break other women's hearts and the hearts of their kids, they don't deserve you to treat them that way. No judge is going to allow a parent to take a kid away from their current home just because a parent wants to bail so his excuse isn't even legit. You are being taking advantage and lied to, but you deserve it getting into a relationship with a married man.