Thanks for this fine article, Mariam.  I had a similar college experience to yours-I think all of us start out our young adult years trying to become a man or a woman, and this often begins with conformity to societal and religious gender roles.  I just turned 40 and have found the last 5 years explosive in terms of becoming free of those role expectations and defining my womanhood in my own and the Holy Spirit's freedom.  I believe this is the purpose of the second half of life, to become our true selves and let the ego die.  Happy Birthday and best wishes on your mid-life!