"I’ve heard our new president’s remarks excused as just locker-room banter, and people say, “That’s just how men talk to each other.” "

Whenever I've heard that, my reaction is  that perhaps that's how a certain type of male jerks talk to each other, but it's hardly a universal thing. Amongst the men in my social circle, I have never, not even once, heard any of them talk like that. 

People making the "everybody does it, so it's OK" argument are just outing themselves as being the sort of person who engages in this behavior