I don't think I have posted anything judgemental on these Globe comments in the past and this might be the first time.
Young woman, if you were my sister or daughter, I would say this:

You have been gently manipulated into giving up your power.  You have been tricked into thinking that this level of degradation can be made normal.   
You sound like you have an immensely kind nature and you think  the best of everyone and wish all well- at the expense of your own happiness.

The wife of this "man" is in a position not far removed from your own.  She has resigned herself to being treated with no respect.
She has daughters, you say.  They might know or suspect that their father does not honor his marriage.
They will grow up thinking that women must resign themselves to being emotionally abused, that they cannot demand respect and get it.

Ask yourself exactly what you need to be happy and do not tell yourself that you can get by on less.