Mary, thanks for what you wrote.  It is a comfort to know that worshiping with others is about sharing something we hold in common.  And, it is comfortable to think of those we worship with as part of the "family".  But I think Jesus came to show us that those out in the streets, the "blanket man on the bus", is also part of the human family we are called to love and care for.  

It is terribly hard to do, live by, act on, that idea of embracing the stranger who needs our love and help.  I make no claim that I get past that fear any better than most.  Just ... sometimes, God gets through.  Prayer helps.  Worship helps.  But I think we need to focus on what we take out of the Sunday Mass and out into the daily interactions outside the familiar, safe family.