I don't see why our natural survival strategies are a bad thing.  Did you ask the question, e.g., "Who in your life was responsible for your empathy and gentle characteristics?"  

People might think that men have had the most influence in their lives, but the reality of our society is that women are a hugely powerful force that control, or at least have enormous influence over, men.  The idea that women should be more like men and men should be more like women is harmful repression of what are good, proven survival strategies for all of history.  Do we really need aggressive women and feminized men?