and you will get neither the justification or acceptance of tragedy as the wish of God from me.   What you will get is that God allows these things to happen to happen for specific purposes and reasons.   He would much rather that humans had made other choices.    I also agree that religious zealots can go too far.  I have no use for them either.
I hate to disappoint you, but that Golden Rule you are so proud of is not part of the secular humanist doctrine.   It is part of Biblical teaching.   Matthew 7:12, part of Jesus's sermon on the mount.
  So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.