The Church is recovering from one of the darkest periods in her history, when reasonable complaints about some modern trends were distorted into a vicious anti-modernist campaign, when Christians fought each other on the battlefield, when Church "doctrine" was used to justify genocide, etc. That recovery has been impeded by overly rosy memories of a time when people knew they sinned when they ate meat on the wrong day, but not when they declared war on others.
The Church cannot be a bystander to war, as you want her to be. She is called to be a peacemaker. We are called to be peacemakers, not opponents to efforts to promote mercy. The Church that will not accept at least some blame when members war with one anoher is a Church that has not been evangelized, let alone catechized.
Perhaps you should read the Divine Comedy to learn more about the sins that condemn us to hell, the sins that we must be purged of, and the joy of heaven. It is a complling summary of Aquinas' moral theology.