I have no experience of American Catholicism but I do have experience of living in England as a cradle Catholic and it doesn't seem to be any different from previous generations in the USA.
My parents, my mother at least would not have understood the meaning of "gay catholic". She didn't, in fact, until one day out of the blue she asked me, "what do homosexuals do?" When I told her as delicately as I could, she could hardly believe me. The thought of it made her physically sick.
Coincidentally, years later my mother-in-law asked me, "What do lesbians do?" She was similarly shocked and sickened.
I suggest that your depiction of our ancestors cozily accepting homosexuality within the family, "at the table" is totally false. You forget that children would have been at that "table" and to be explicit about 'uncle George sleeping with Uncle Joe' would never have been mentioned in polite circles, even if children were not present. 
This issue has nothing to do with Fr Coughlin whatsoever.