You say:  "Technically, Jesus created the institutional religion that is the Catholic church when he said "you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church."

I realize that this is "traditional" Catholic teaching (based entirely on a literal interpretation of Mt 16) but do you think there is a chance that Jesus may have been speaking metaphorically about this?  After all, parables and hyperbole are commonly used throughout sacred scripture. 

Further, what evidence do you have to support a literal interpretation, especially given the idea of erecting the church on a mere mortal is rather counter intuitive... wouldn't you agree?