Who's judging? The Church is perfectly entitled, indeed it is obligated, to teach the Gospel message clearly to the living. The dead person will be judged by God; and when they are dead it is too late to love them out of their sinful life or to pray they will change. Offering the rite of a funeral service for a person who died in open defiance of Catholic teaching, without repentance, is tantamount to the Church publicly endorsing that sin and thereby threatening the salvation of others.