I feel angry too at the way the Catholic Church invalidates my personhood because I am female, and your depictions above of clerical hangups are incisive and smart.  Unfortunately I can't share your optimism about the Protestant churches whose clergy are married.  I grew up in Presbyterian/Evangelical churches whose clergy were all husbands and fathers.  I heard 10 times as many sermons on "male headship" of the family, on how a good Christian wife is submissive and attentive to homemaking as I ever did on caring for the poor.  One church voted to remove women from the church elder board because "Scripture makes it clear that women are not naturally suited for leadership."  One pastor and his wife had 6 kids and counting because "use of birth control and deciding when is the right time to have a child would be interfering with God's will."  Cultural pressure for males to cover their insecurities by way of superiority and dehumanization of the "other" runs deep in all our institutions.