Perhaps it is a mirage, but the end result is a steady barque in regards to the Orthodox, ours seems like storms not only on the outside, but people inside willingly trying to capsize it. 

Their disagreements seem to be small or petty, ours are polarising, with the very office intended to maintain unity and orthodoxy is currently ineffectual. 

I really hope I can have my doubts eased at some point, and recognize the bride of Christ with confidence. 

I certainly don't want to be like the hypocrites, and be part of, or associate with something I don't believe in.