I wonder if part of your "hard time with the church these days" is its role in creating the conditions for what we see in public, politics, and, yes, in church?
There was a move in religious education in the 60's that began to incorporate  the process of human maturation rather than the virtually exclusive imposition of "ought". It it didn't survive the traditionalist resistance and by the era of John Paul II etc., it seems profoundly denied. 
The true Jesuit concept of "discernment" and "spiritual advisor" so in tune with the ancient concept in Celtic spirituality of "Anam Cara" (soul friend) incorporate the essential elements of intelligence, fact, reason, personal honesty, moral and personal state of maturity, question in challenge, in communion, in community.
Neither church nor institutions in general have been able to cope with the evolution of civilization.
Church needs to save - not its ideology - but rather its humanity.
Wow, doesn't that sound like what Jesus was up to?