"You don't approve of gay marriage? Then don't go to one or have one. But if your business is making wedding cakes, then you need to make cakes for everyone."
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Elise,
Why would anyone want to contribute to the success of a business that disapproves of their lifestyle? Writing laws that force a group of people to behave a certain way doesn't eliminate the problem, it only masks it allowing it to fester. 
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As for the gender/bathroom issue, if you really believe in freedom of ideology, you would (in my opinion) try to push a solution that allows both sides to exercise their beliefs freely. I think that this issue could be solved by requiring businesses to provide single unisex bathrooms instead of cattle stalls. This is a progressive solution that would render both sides of the argument moot. Changing areas could be handled similarly as well.
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I guess the question for both sides is: "Which is more important... solving the problem or getting your way."