A child will complain their life is 'dour' when they are not allowed to engage in some desired activity because it is contrary to their good (physical or spiritual).    Putting limits on ourselves to focus on the good to which God has called us, is in fact the whole point of the Christian Life.   The 'dour' life you are referring to is really a call to holiness, which all Christians are called to.    You are focusing on the one single aspect of a relationship to which homosexually inclined persons are prohibited from engaging in because it is contrary to the natural order of their own bodies, and therefore contrary to God's plan for Sexual intimacy.    As Christians, there are all manner of things we are prohibited from doing.   Married men are prohibited from lusting after other women even in their own thoughts.    I too could complain to my middle aged wife (like me) that she is making my life 'dour' because I cannot view pornography of younger woman, It would be childish though.