Here's the ironic thing I've seen.  I once found out a person I'd been dealing with was actually transgender.  "She" told me after I'd been working with "her" for years.  I had no idea.  Didn't really care, it turned out.  Really competent, effective, creative and good judgment worker/supervisor/decision maker.  "She" was transitioning, and was a actually several months away from having the finish up surgery in a foreign country.  
What I can't help thinking about when these sort of debates come up is her boyfriend, who I'd seen attend various functions holding "her" hand, and who "she" referred to as her boyfriend.  An All American military guy.  Army.  Blonde haired, blue eyed, Army Ranger type.   Who knows, though, maybe he wasn't really in the service.  Just cut his hair and obtained some counterfeit stickers for his car.