Well Paul, the words that I have typed were not aimed at nor intended to put the murdered woman in a bad light.  This is the error of so many to think that thoughts of prevention and responsibility are necessarily negative.  Once more, without the pointless exercise of ascribing blame which does not prevent future untoward events, understanding the steps taken by the parties involved can help prevent future tragedies.  Does not just apply to gender issues.  Applies to all those human situations that result in violence or even just hard feelings.  At times in the past, it was understand that each person has a responsibility to take actions and guide events, to the extent that they have control, in positive directions.  Teaching that responsibility can make our society better.