You actually believe a parent should be denied access to their child's graveside?  I already stated it shouldn't be the fathers property.  I think the deceased  woman's husband should be made aware of the clear lack of maturity on the new wife's part and find a more suitable place to lay her to rest.  No parent should have to get their ex's new spouses approval to visit their own child's gravesite.  If she cannot agree to be gracious and allow her access to her daughters graveside she should at least speak up now and tell them she is too sad and small of a person and the child needs to be placed elsewhere.  How would you feel if your ex wife's new husband denied you the right to grieve the way you need to for your own child!  I think you would feel pretty slighted and mistreated.  Like I said if you can't respect and accept someone's past then don't marry them.