I am very sympathetic to this woman's basic gripe -- I lived for many years in Thailand, and constantly engaging with people's stereotyped idea of what you should look like, how you should behave, what you should think, is annoying.  To have to do that in your native land and culture would be massively aggravating.

However, I think a lot of the problem here is that 'race' is a weird mixture of biology, cultural myth, and habit.  Biologically, it doesn't exist; socially, it does, and socially, being 'black' is one of the more charged identities.  My children, for example, are part American Mennonite and part Asian -- they'll get to work out what this means for them on their own, and the people they interact with will have minimal expectations.

As for the writer, what does she expect?  'Black' after all, is a visual identification; some people will depend on that, including some black people.  Many ethnic identities have certain signifiers, that some people meet easily, others not.