instruction:
In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a title for this text. The title should start with "TIFU by", followed by a situation that caused humor. The title should contain 7-12 words, ideally.
question:
Text: obligatory this happened two days ago.

so we were having dinner at my friend's house and all was going fine. i decided that i was thirsty so i drank some water (exciting story telling right here).

the friend i was eating with is a pretty funny guy and he cracked a joke as i drank. this caused me to cough a bit and swallow some down the wrong pipe.

then i go to bed, nothing much has happened since dinner. i should mention i'm crashing at my friends house.

cut to yesterday morning, i wake up in hospital with  my friend pissing himself laughing. turns out, the water i had swallowed made me violently cough during the night. my friend had called an ambulance and forcefully made me dislodge the water, even though i didn't wake up.

so now i have to pay +$2000 in medical fees after insurance.
answer:
TIFU by drinking water


question:
Text: my company is having a thanksgiving potluck tomorrow. i agreed to make mashed potatoes. in trying to impress people, i attempted to make them from scratch.

when i was younger and lived with my parents, i always peeled the potatoes in the sink and disposed of the skins via garbage disposal.

i think i overestimated my new apartment sink. a few minutes after shredding the skins, the sink clogged and black stuff is now creeping up.

i don't own a plunger and i have been drinking for the past 2 hours.

i hope the pipes hold up until after work tomorrow...
answer:
TIFU by peeling potatoes in the sink


question:
Text: so this happened about a year ago but i only just recently started browsing reddit and came upon this sub. (apologies if i misuse any cool terms. like i said, total noob)

i work in an office at the front desk so i come in contact with everyone that comes through. this particular day i was feeling really good. i'd just started a new workout regime that had been doing wonders for my health and self-esteem. a woman and her adult daughter, who was pregnant, were in front of me and we were having polite conversation about this and that, you know, typical "single-serving" conversations (fight club reference ftw). i mentioned that my sister was expecting her second child in october and i was really excited to have another little one in the family. she proceeds to ask, "oh, that's wonderful! when are you due?" this took me by surprise, obviously, because to me i didn't look pregnant. i blanched and quickly looked down at my stomach then back up and stammered, "oh, uh...right around the same time." she smiled, gushed a bit more, and asked what gender it was, to which i replied we were keeping it a surprise. we shook hands, she took my business card, and her and her daughter were on their way.

i thought that would be the end of it. my self-esteem quickly dashed i was ready to go home and cry to my husband about how cruel the world is and how all my hard work has been for nothing. he's awesome at making me feel better and basically said "fuck what she said."

a few weeks passed and i'd totally forgotten about the incident. i was at work doing my regularly scheduled duties when a package arrived addressed to me. this is very strange considering i don't order supplies or anything for my office and thought it was a mistake. but it had our address on it so i decided to take it to my manager as i normally would. i head back to my desk and a few minutes later i hear some confused chattering coming from my manager's office. she comes out with the box which has newborn clothes, a few bottles and pacifiers and...a breast pump. i turn 10 shades of red and experience an array of emotions ranging from embarrassment, sadness, hysteria, depression, and anger. i had no response. i just stood there dumbfounded. she had been laughing i could tell, but after seeing my face she could see how upset i was. all i could do was grab the box and walk to the backroom. i saw there was a card inside so i grabbed it and threw the box on the ground. i ripped open the envelope and lo and behold it was from the lady. "congratulations on your new bundle of joy!" it said, or something to that effect. i crumpled it up and threw it in the trash. 

no one bothered me while i was back there. i did some pacing and my thoughts were racing to things like, "what the fuck??? who does she think she is??" and "a breast pump???? really???" i mean, it was a nice breast pump...but fuck! i was able to calm down and compose myself and went back out to my desk. no one asked me anything which was for the best. they all pretended like it didn't happen. 

to this day my sister still has no idea those gifts i gave her for my niece were actually meant for me. oh well. it was a nice breast pump.

 

edit: to some of the commenters-- obviously i overreacted and yes it was my fault :) thanks for pointing it out.
answer:

TIFU by admitting I was pregnant


