TASK DEFINITION: Given a post that is a real-life anecdote of a complex ethical situation and an associated claim about its type, verify if the claim is true or not. The claim asks if the posts are historical or hypothetical. The posts are "HISTORICAL" when the author has already done something and they are "HYPOTHETICAL" when the author is considering doing something in the future. Say 'yes' if the claim is true otherwise say 'no'
PROBLEM: CLAIM : The following post is HISTORICAL. POST : **throwaway because my guild uses reddit to communicate. i do know that lgbtq issues can be contentious and can be seen as baiting but i have read through similar posts i searched on this reddit and haven't found any very similar issues. i promise i am not trying to be inflammatory and will try to be as respectful as possible in my language.**

i am one of the guild leaders for a gay male guild on world of warcraft. for us, having a space to be openly gay around other openly gay guys is comforting. wow still has a lot of homophobia, especially in raiding guilds. some of us have also met up in real life once or twice yearly. general lgbtq\*, genderqueer, and lesbian guilds also exist.

recently, a new member joined our guild who self-identified as gay and gender non-conforming transman. in their words, they were born a female but dress in a more masculine style so they don't feel comfortable using a female identity, but also maintain female physiology and are interested in men. from the guild's perspective, there is no issue here and they were fully welcomed.

the issue arose in our guild discord server. we are 18+ and we have a #nsfw channel where we share adult images. this channel is opt-in, clearly marked, and not mandatory. when new member joined, they began to share some pornographic material of trans men (no bottom surgery). no one had an issue with this but they did not much attention if any at all because i think this type of pornography is less popular with our members.

new member complained in private that they felt excluded because other images shared got comments but not theirs. we let them know that they were welcome to share images but that people were free to comment on whichever images they liked. we didn't hear back. a few days later the user shared some revealing selfies. one user replied "wow, looking good" but then someone else shared something else and the attention was redirected there. the new user said the person who shared after them was transphobic and trying to drown out their images because it had a vagina and not a penis pictured (their words).

i re-messaged the user in the private that the drama isn't appreciated and that there was nothing transphobic about what the other user did and name-calling was unacceptable. the user replied to us that they wouldn't stand by if someone was being transphobic. they continued name-calling in the public channel so i didn't hesitate to remove them from the in-game guild and the chat server.

the next day, users that weren't online at the time saw the remnants of the conversation (i removed the personal photos for privacy) but one took issue and felt like the situation was transphobic. ultimately this led to a heated discussion amongst members. i loathe how much drama this has caused.

**was i the asshole or is this just a case of a very emotional issue bringing out a more heated, sensitive side in some people? thank you guys for reading all of this.**

SOLUTION: yes

PROBLEM: CLAIM : The following post is HISTORICAL. POST : (Gender neutral language used on purpose)

I have been jumping feet first into the dating pool recently (mainly app based) and have come to the conclusion that I have to arrange dates as soon as possible because a lot of people use old or heavily filtered photos and when we meet up it's different to expectations. To each their own, but I've had really good conversations with people via text, then on meeting I find out that I am not attracted to them and that would have been clear if they'd represented themselves accurately. Obviously everyone wants to put their most flattering photos, but I'm talking about major weight/age/face differences. Not an attack at any type of person, but just being accurate.

I never like to ghost someone and I always send a "It was nice meeting but I don't think I'm interested in pursuing anything further" type message. Would I be an asshole to include "... to be honest, the reason is you look quite different from your photos and when we met I realised you're not my type".

If someone said that to me I think I would be upset, but then realise that I should look at being more accurate. Perhaps the person doesn't currently realise the reason dates don't work out is because the other person is disappointed on arrival.

SOLUTION: no

PROBLEM: CLAIM : The following post is HISTORICAL. POST : First time posting here, and on Reddit in general, so apologies in advance in advance for any errors in formatting/posting.

So, a bit of background on my friend (18M) and I (18M) have known each other for a few years. We used to be quite good friends but I developed a one-sided crush on them, needless to say things became awkward between us and eventually I decided it would be best for us to stop talking, we didn't talk for around 1 year and I figured that was it for us. 

Recently he got back in touch with me and we started talking again. Things were awkward at first but I was determined to try and work past it. One night I decided to ask him where he thought our friendship would go in the future and he told me it was better if we didn't bring up the conversation again, that decision upset me though I didn't voice it and instead simply agreed to not mention it again.

After that I decided I wanted to see him in person again and we arranged to meet up at his house, the day went smoothly and we played games and then went out for a walk while talking to one another. When it got late I was getting ready to go home and we hugged, though after that he told me I was bad at picking up on social cues, when I asked him what he meant later he told me he didn't remember. This again upset me but I decided not to voice it yet again.

The next day I questioned him on something. I had previously asked him if he wanted to stay round mine and he agreed to it, the day after we were round his he told me he didn't want to stay round anymore as things were still awkward. I told him I wanted there to be full honesty between us, I was again upset by his actions, this time it was because he had lied to me. That evening he told me that we don't see each other the same in this friendship and that we should stop talking, I've tried to contact him since but I've just been ignored and this whole ordeal has made me miserable.

I keep wondering if I had simply moved too fast, that I should have given him more space and that it was me who was making things awkward. So, AITA for moving too quickly and potentially driving him away?

SOLUTION:
yes

