Problem: Levi Johnston Doesn't Like to Take It Slow

: : Levi Johnston Doesn't Like to Take It Slow

Posted Dec 30th 2009 4:15AM by TMZ Staff

Finally, someone other than Bristol Palin is blaming Levi Johnston for pulling a quickie ... and this time it's cops in Alaska.We're told an Alaska State Trooper nailed Johnston for driving 63 in a 45 back in October -- and fined the accidental Palin extended family member $155.The good news: Levi has finally learned to use protection ... he was wearing his seat belt when he was pulled over.Baby steps.

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Summary: Finally, someone other than Bristol Palin is blaming Levi Johnston for pulling a quickie ... and this time it's cops in Alaska. We're told an Alaska State ...

Extra £70 on every gas bill as cold snap bites

By Heidi Blake and Martin Evans Published: 12:21PM GMT 12 Jan 2010

Households keeping the heating on for longer during the cold snap will add £70 to the average January gas bill – a 52 per cent rise on last year, according to estimates.

Families will pay £1.9 billion in extra heating charges if the freezing weather continues for another week, with the average gas bill for the month reaching £227, according to Energyhelpline, a price comparison service.

With thousands cutting back on heating their homes rather than face a hefty bill, there were fears that winter deaths could multiply.

Mark Todd of Energyhelpline said: "Normal temperatures for January over the past 10 years have been about 5C. For every degree it drops outside it costs more to heat our homes, as the heat loss is greater. Wind chill can also increase this as the cold wind strips our homes of warmth just as it strips us of warmth when we go outside."

He said householders could help to cut bills by maintaining a temperature of 18C in bedrooms at night, while living rooms during the day might need to be kept at 21C.

The weather provoked fears among thousands of A-level students that they could miss out on university places as exams were thrown into chaos. Though conditions eased in many areas, about 300 schools remained closed in the worst hit areas. More than a million pupils are due to take AS and A-levels in the next few weeks.

Ed Balls, the Schools Secretary, urged head teachers to do everything possible to stay open. Isabel Nisbet, the acting chief executive of Ofqual, the exam regulator, said postponing the programme was not an option. In rural counties, many roads remained impassable.

With concerns remaining over "dangerously low" grit stocks, Theresa Villiers, the shadow transport secretary, accused ministers of making "inadequate preparations" for the cold snap. Several councils warned that salt levels were reaching critical levels.

Lord Adonis, the Transport Secretary, said that in the face of "the most prolonged spell of freezing conditions" since December 1981 "all main transport networks are operational". But he told the Lords that "further measures are likely to be required over the next 48 hours to keep networks open".

The National Grid issued its fourth gas shortage alert in a week yesterday and 100 factories had their gas cut off.

Temperatures were noticeably warmer than of late, at an average of 34F (1C) and the picture for the rest of the week was relatively stable, although more snow showers were forecast in some areas, with lows of 27F (-3C).

summary: Keeping the heating on for longer will add &pound;70 to the average January gas 
  bill.

Input: Nymphomaniac - first look review
Hang on to your seat back, your Bible, or the hand of a friend. Lars von Trier's Nymphomaniac bludgeons the body and tenderises the soul. It is perplexing, preposterous and utterly fascinating; a false bill of goods in that it's a film about sex that is deliberately unsexy and a long, garrulous story (two volumes, four hours) that largely talks to itself. Those naked figures in motion are just a distraction. To blunder in on Nymphomaniac is to catch the sight of a middle-aged Dane masturbating alone in a darkened room. It may be sensational, it might even be art. But I'm not sure it is intended for public consumption.

This, perhaps, is the corner that von Trier has painted himself into. Following his ejection from the 2011 Cannes film festival as a result of an ill-advised Nazi "joke", the puckish director has taken a public vow of silence. He has turned his back on the circus and pulled up the drawbridge. Nymphomaniac, for better or worse, feels as though it was made in a vacuum; a private shadow play, typified by theatrical dialogue and unvarnished editorialising. If von Trier can't speak to the press he can speak through his film. No interruptions, no questions. He is all set to splurge.

Charlotte Gainsbourg stars as Joe, a brittle, lonely sex addict (though she dislikes the term) who recounts her life story to Seligman (Stellan Skarsgård), her virginal father confessor. The film rewinds to Joe's youth, where she is played by British newcomer Stacy Martin (walking a teasing line between the enigmatic and the vacant) and prowls a non-specific city that looks European (the film was shot in Cologne) but adopts the pound sterling.

The drama is dark and heavy, marbled with contrivances and coincidences that the players remark upon and encrusted with a mixed-bag of supporting performances, from Shia LaBeouf (ill at ease) and Uma Thurman (electrifying) to Jamie Bell, curiously riveting as a neat little sadist who never once meets your eye.

Inside the monastic cell, our heroine spins the story of Joe in all its delirium and anguish. Seligman, meanwhile, hunches over her bed, providing an extended running commentary. He compares her odyssey to that of the whore of Babylon, the wife of Claudius, the compositions of Bach and the sport of angling. At one stage Joe recalls a contest with a friend, in which they scuttle through the carriages of a commuter train, seeing how many men they can screw. "That's a very clear parallel to fishing in a stream," exclaims Seligman. Joe shrugs and nods. She has no reason to doubt it.

How was it for you? How was it for me? Nymphomaniac doesn't care. It goes about things its own way, in the service of its own pleasure, manhandling the audience from one position to the next, occasionally snickering at its own private jokes and daring us to decipher them. Personally I found this a bruising, gruelling experience and yet the film has stayed with me. It is so laden with highly charged set pieces, so dappled with haunting ideas and bold flights of fancy that it finally achieves a kind of slow-burn transcendence. Nymphomaniac annoys me, repels me, and I think I might love it. It's an abusive relationship; I need to see it again.

Nymphomaniac is released in Denmark on Christmas Day and in the UK on 7 March 2014• Xan Brooks reports from the first screening in Copenhagen• Watch a video review of the film
What was this article about?
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It's about:
Lars Von Trier's sex epic is a four-hour cold shower, but it ravishes the brain and leaves you begging for more, writes Xan Brooks