Given a post that is a real-life anecdote of a complex ethical situation and a question asks if AUTHOR, NOBODY, EVERYBODY, or OTHER is wrong in the situation. Answer the question and classify your answers into yes or no.

Q: Is OTHER wrong in the post ? POST : One of my good friends is getting married soon and asked me to be his best man. The problem is he wants me to clean shave my beard or shave it to a few weeks growth at most. I've been growing my beard for over a year now and absolutely do not want to shave it. I will for sure make sure it's neat and well groomed and I've talked with him about this but he really wants it gone. AITA for refusing to shave it?

A: yes
****
Q: Is AUTHOR wrong in the post ? POST : Hi guys, I’m looking for some outside perspective on this.This post is probably going to be long but it is important I don’t leave any important details out. Let me start off by giving you a little bit of background:

Me and my close friend Camila met in our freshman year of high school and ever since then we’ve been great friends and have gone through multiple milestones together. 

During junior year I befriended this other girl, Daniela (26F) and me and her shortly became best friends. A couple of years later, I introduced my friend Camila to my bff Daniela and they hit it off right away. They also became good friends and the three of us became inseparable. 

Camila has a couple of other close friends and all of us would hang out sometimes but they were mainly her friends. Anyways, I moved to a different state in my early 20’s and during that time Daniela and Camila grew even closer. Daniela also ended up moving to a different state a little while later and so did one of other Camila’s close friends (Felipe / 27m). We all ended up in different states but that didn’t stop us from staying really good friends and we all kept in touch online. 

Me, Daniela and Camila got into very serious relationships around the same time and we all bonded over the fact that we had new relationships. We all made a few trips together and hung out with our SOs and they all got along really well, especially because our bfs were very similar in the sense that they are all very chill, homey people that rather stay home than go out.

My bff Daniela has been doing really well financially so she’s been able to travel to our hometown a lot more frequently and has been able to hang out with our friend Camila more than I have. 

About 3 years ago, Camila’s bf proposed to her but she didn’t tell me anything. I actually had to find out through public announcements. She later got married at court but I only found out through Daniela the day before. I started to feel a bit left out, especially because I started noticing that Daniela was more aware about what was going on in her life than I was. A few months later, Daniela got proposed to by her bf as well and got married soon after. 

During that time (about 2 years ago) me and my bf at the time were talking about the future and we found out we wanted completely different things: I wanted to get married one day and have kids. He did not. Also, I started to feel bored in my relationship because we would never do anything exciting and I wanted more out of life. I decided we needed to go our separate ways because we were not longer compatible. I told both of my friends about it and even though they were supportive of my decision of breaking up, I could tell Camila wasn’t really about it, especially because my ex and her husband got along well and she really liked my ex as a person.

A couple of months after my breakup, I met a new person and we connected so well we started dating almost right away. My curren bf is a musician and because of him my life became a little bit more exciting. I started going out to shows and concerts and going on tour with his band. My life changed completely, I  became a lot more outgoing and extroverted because of him. 

I dont know how to describe this, but I had a feeling Camila was not a big fan of my new lifestyle. Or my new relationship. She started becoming more and more distant and would only reply to my messages days later or sometimes not reply at all. Her and her other friends, including my bff, started taking trips together without even asking me if I wanted to join them and I would later see pictures of them together which made me feel very left out. 
Regardless of this situation, I tried my best to not take anything personal and never stopped trying to be involved in their lives and made a constant effort to stay in touch. 

Daniela still checks up on me regularly and has been there for me, especially during a really rough time in my life last year when I was dealing with really bad depression and kind of having an ‘existential crisis’ (which I’ve finally recovered from). Camila was not there for me at all. She also failed to wish me a happy birthday the past couple of years, even though I know she was aware of it this past on because I saw she watched my stories on Instagram celebrating it with my boyfriend.

So basically, I feel completely excluded from Camila’s close circle of friends and even though I understand we have changed a lot and become completely different people, I can’t help but feel, idk, ‘judged’ by her ? Like it almost feels as if she looks down on me for not being married and for still wanting to go out and maybe not having a more ‘stable’ life. Or maybe that’s all in my head, but that’s just how it feels.
Me and my bf are very much in love and are talking about marriage and kids but aren’t ready for that just yet, we just want to enjoy our 20’s being childfree a little longer.

This is where the last straw comes in though:

A couple of days ago, I was added to a group chat named ‘Camila’s baby shower’. And it had Camila’s closest friends it it. Her friend Felipe wrote in it “as you all know, Camila is pregnant...” and I was completely caught off guard because I had NO idea. Nobody mentioned anything to me. Felipe was throwing ideas for the baby shower, and they are planning on doing it in Orlando (which is far from me) and rent a very big and expensive airbnb for the weekend. This trip with airfare and everything else would cost me close to 1k. 

When I expressed I was not aware of her pregnancy (she’s almost 3 months into it), she kind of responded in like an annoying tone like ‘yeah, Im pregnant but I want to keep it in DL for now’. Everyone went silent on the group chat and I could feel a sense of awkwardness at the fact she had not tell me about it yet. It was also very obvious she wasn’t expecting Felipe to make that group chat and that I’d be in it.

Now, this is very important and Im beyond happy for my friend and I don’t want to make this about me at all, which is why I haven’t said anything to anyone about how I feel. But I was wondering, WIBTA if I don’t spend all that money to go to an event I don’t really feel welcomed to? Am I making this too much about myself? Do you guys think I’m just reading too much into it and she’s just too busy with her life to be catching up with me? Please, I need any kind of perspective on this.

Thanks in advance for your replies.















A: no
****
Q: Is NOBODY wrong in the post ? POST : I'm narcoleptic. I've had it for around three years now, but just got the official diagnosis about a half a year ago. It makes a lot of things in my life very, very hard. But my friends don't seem to understand that. 

When I first got it, I was sleeping around 20 hours a day. The cataplexy was so bad doctor's though my muscles had atrophied. I could barely lift my arms above my head. Since I was sleeping so much I couldn't eat as much, and I dropped down to 79 pounds (I'm 4'11, so it's scary but not like super life threatening). It's gotten better since then, but it still effects me greatly. A couple weeks ago I was hanging out with my friends and mentioned that the pharmacy fucked up my meds again and that I was genuinely worried about how I was going to handle myself until I got them back. I'm in college and I've already missed a lot of classes at this point because of my narcolepsy, even with my meds. Without them I cant function. One of my friends kinda laughs it off like "you'll be fine", another one says "just drink coffee". 

A little bit before that, I had sat down individually with my friends and told them what to do if I had a narcoleptic attack in front of them, especially in public. I can kinda feel them coming on, so I'm very very good at sneaking off to have sleep attacks in private. Because of this, none of them had even seen me have a full blown attack. Anyways, I told them to help me get to somewhere safe and private, help me take my meds and let me sleep for around 15 minutes before trying to wake me up. Simple stuff. 

So I was real sick of them not taking my illness seriously. They don't need to baby me or anything, just understand that sometimes shit is really hard for me and it's scary. I was hanging out at one of my friends places with some other people about a week ago, and I got an idea. I wanted to see if they actually listened to what I told them before. So I dramatically stood up and collapsed onto the floor (my real attacks arnt that flashy, since I know how to deal with them).  My friends are confused. They don't know what to do, until one of them reminds the others I'm narcoleptic. So what do they do? Put a blanket over my body and leave me in the middle of the room. Fantastic. I stay down for 10 minutes maybe (trying hard not to actually fall asleep) before getting up and excusing myself home. It definitely made some of the people there uncomfortable. 

I feel manipulative for pulling this 'test' on them. 

AITA? 

A:
no
****
