instruction:
In this task you are given an anecdote, which recount a complex ethical situation. The question you are given is, has the author of the anecdote acted ethically? answer this question with "RIGHT" or "WRONG".
question:
I'm now 37 weeks and close to labor. I'm 24, 23 when I got pregnant. I'm very conflicted at the moment but the choice has already been made, and we will be raising this child. I just want to know if I did the right thing. Here's the back story: 



Some months before I got pregnant I got a call from the hospital after a routine PAP smear test. They found cancer cells and I was to visit them ASAP. This is all after a year of remission from my breast cancer. They told me I had to quit the birth control pill because the hormones could be influencing my cervix. I quit that day and had planned to get a coil in after my second period. 


A week later I got my first period. But the second period never came. I went to my GP and said "doctor, I'm now 1 month over time for my period and I'm worried". He said "don't worry, it can take up to 6 months for your period to regulate again". So I had no worries. He didn't recommend a pregnancy test. 


Two months after this my SO tells me I'm getting fat and to get a test. Test comes back positive. I immediately call my GP. He tells me to come in for an ultrasound. He puts the apparatus on my belly and starts laughing, like full on laugh. He turns the screen my way and there on the screen I see my daughter for the first time. Her head, back, rib cage, legs, all are formed. This is no just conceived embryo. He tells me I'm at least 3 to 4 months in. So abortion is still possible but I must make the decision very quickly. I decide to keep it after discussing with SO.


I'm very pro-choice, and if I was maybe 1 month a long instead of 3 the possibility of me aborting it would be 90%. But it was a person in my mind. 


Our situation is also not great for raising a child. Here's a list: 


- My SO is 21 years old (20 when I got pregnant), and still in college. He won't be done with school for another 4 years. 

- My SO is in huge debt because of parking/insurance tickets and all his finances go towards that (which is good, I want him to be debt free, but it needs to be considered).

- We do not own a house or rent a place, we live with my father (who now also has to deal with this new born, he's 65 and recently retired). My father agreed to give us the upper floor of the house (3 large bed rooms) to create a nursery, a bedroom and a study room. 

- My income solely goes towards renovation of these rooms, the baby things we need and whatever is left is for our food and other expenses. I also save 10% and another 5% for little one when she's 18. My net income a month is between €2200 and €3000. 

- I'm currently on maternity leave but before this I was working as a consultant. I lost the project I was on because of maternity leave. My boss is looking for a new project for me to start after maternity leave. But it could mean we have to live on 70% of my income if he can't find anything in time. 




So with all these points in mind am I the asshole for keeping her and wanting to raise her?
answer:
RIGHT


question:
It's not that I don't like them, but I just get a general sense of unease around, say, a person with down syndrome. I go to school with a guy with down syndrome, and he's pretty cool. I just... tend to keep my distance.
answer:
RIGHT


question:
My roommate and I moved into an apartment complex around Thanksgiving of last year. I had stressed the importance of getting a 2nd story unit as I had heard reviews saying that the insulation between floors was awful. Unfortunately due to improper communication on the managements front we were stuck into a first floor unit. And it is as every bit bad as the reviews stated.

The first few nights of being there our upstairs neighbors would have their young child up and running around the unit until around 2-3am in the morning. Every footfall sounded like a hammer on our ceiling. I tried using my fan on a higher setting and putting in ear-plugs to dampen the noise. And unfortunately, it didn't do anything. I would just have to wait out the noise to go to sleep. 

I wanted to give our neighbors the benefit of a doubt, in that they probably had no idea how poorly insulated the units were. At this point, it was nearing the holidays so I had bought some cards and candy and thought to write them a friendly note. I delivered it to their door with some candies before work. It read like this:
"Dear upstairs neighbors,

I don't know if you're aware of this, but unfortunately, our building's floors and ceilings are not well sound-proofed. For the most part, everything has been okay. However, there have been quite a few times where we have been disturbed and interupted while sleeping from the little tyke running and playing into the wee hours of the morning. We would appreciate if you would please take this into account.
If you have any questions or concerns we wouldn't mind meeting, We'd also like the chance to get to know you better😊!"

The next few nights had been hit or miss, but enough that I thought they were trying. A week or so passes and I step outside and see someone had left their stroller next to the stairs of our connected units. It was pretty cold and wet out, and thought it would be frustrating for the owner to come out to a frozen or at the very least, soaked stroller. I felt incredibly nervous to but I walked up the stairs to see if it was theirs. I knocked on the door a couple of times to no answer. As I was headed back out to the parking lot I heard someone open a door. It was one of the neighbors. I stopped to say hello and mentioned why I had knocked on the door.  Once she figured out I was the neighbor underneath her unit she admitted that things could get loud since her husband came home late from work and that her child was up and down all night. I exclaimed that I really appreciated what they were doing and understood that young children could be up and down all night and that it was probably more the poor sound-proofing than anything. 
Not even two days later, I'm ringing customers out at work and lo and behold my neighbors come through my line. I didn't even realize it until the woman recognized me. She made a point to emphasize that they had left their daughter at home, which I thought was odd. Once she had been cashed out her husband walks over and asks if I was the one who wrote the note. I said I was. to which he asked me again a couple more times, slightly more aggressively each time. The Woman asked me if I had children in a way that made me unsure if she meant
"We heard strange noises from your apartment that sounded like cihldren."
				or
"How dare you judge us and tell us what to do since we have children and you don't"
At the time I read it as the first and told them that I had a cat that occasionally knocked things over to get attention during the day and had a high pitched meow.
But to the second more likely interpretation, I have no intent on judging them for having children. I just wanted to let them know what could be heard from downstairs, in as polite a way as possible.
They had a pretty loud argument that night and its taken a couple more talks since then to get the noise settled down by midnight.
TL;DR:  AITA for asking our neighbors to quiet down?

answer:

RIGHT


