In this task you are given an anecdote. You must find out whether the anecdote is something the author has done or is considering doing. Label the instances as "HISTORICAL" when the author has already done something and label them as "HYPOTHETICAL" when the author is considering doing something in the future.
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Question: It's a long story (I can try to bulletpoint if anyone wants to know) but I took a DNA test months ago. Found out my dead father isn't my father, it's my godfather who is estranged to us. My mother actually made him my godfather *because* she knew I was biologically his. I suspected for a decade but didn't know till I got the test

Before my bio father became estranged to us he had a son with his girlfriend. I met the son when he was a newborn. The girlfriend left with the son to another state and my bio father left us to be with her a while later. Didn't talk to him for over a decade. We still don't really talk and I found out the girlfriend became his wife and they're now completely separated. They had two more kids and he's not allowed to see them, so I can't even speak to them through him.

Out of curiosity I decided to look the son up since I remembered his name and realized he'd be a teenager. At one point my bio father, who lived with us at the time, was going to seek custody of him. So for a few months I anticipated this kid being my little brother.

Shockingly, the kid looks *exactly* like me. His childhood photos look exactly like my nephew. My sister is also my godfather's, we knew that for sure 100% for years. She took her own test and it says we're full siblings. I showed my friends and therapist his photos from his Facebook and they thought they were old photos of me with long hair. We're almost twins.

So, yeah, the kid is 16 now. He has his own Facebook and Instagram. 

I messaged his mother on Facebook to ask her permission to speak to him months ago. I wrote the letter with my therapist and was cordial and delicate considering the circumstances. She never responded. I was heartbroken but understood. 

My mother brought the kid up the other day and said she knows I'm probably sad that I can't have a relationship with my two little brothers and sister. I told her I was going to wait till the youngest is in their 20s before reaching out (that'll be in 10 - 12 years). She said the oldest is 16 and she thinks he's old enough for me to at least PM him to introduce myself.

I'm super conflicted. I don't know this kid and I don't know if he can handle something like this. On the other hand, 16 is old enough to understand. At the end of the day I want him to decide whether he wants me in his life or not, not his mother. Obviously, she can decide that for right now, but when he's an adult he can choose on his own.

My mother disagrees and thinks 16 is fine. She's under the impression that he probably wouldn't tell his mother and just talk to me. I wouldn't want to do that, however. I don't want to burn bridges or cause unnecessary issues with his mother. 

Family is super important to me, especially siblings. My sisters and their kids are my best friends. Would I be the asshole if I PM'd him despite his mother indirectly telling me no? Should I wait till he's 18 or in his 20s?

Advice? Has anyone been in this situation before?

Answer: HISTORICAL


Question: Throwaway because knowing my luck people will see this.

So i've been dating my girlfriend for a little over a year now, and I've made it pretty clear with her that i don't like clubbing in the slightest, and made it crystal clear that I wasn't gonna stay with her if she decided to do go clubbing as that's out of my comfort zone and wouldn't feel good about it at all. At first she moaned and said she'd only go "to have fun with her friends" and that she isn't "like that" though i know that her friends are a little promiscuous, but then changed her mind a couple months down the line saying that she doesn't want to, and that it's not worth "losing me" over it. Now today we were facetiming as she was pretty busy and so was i so we didn't get a chance to meet up, and she mentions that her friend invited her this week to go but she was busy with work that night, but her mate invited her to go this weekend or something and that she wanted to go, now her exact words were "would you break up with me if I did though?" and i started to get a bit heated but tried to keep my cool and was like "do whatever you want i don't care" i then found an excuse to get off the call and i got upset since she knows how i feel about it and it's not the first time she's tried to swing me round to agree with her. 

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if you wonder why i'm not a fan of it, you should see the type of girls that club here in the UK, and the usual "it was a drunken mistake"

Answer: HYPOTHETICAL


Question: **Cast of characters:**

**Me**: 18/m senior in high school who attends an online school and also works from home

**Mother**: My mother, whose house I live in (I mean, my parents are married, so I guess it's also my dad's house)

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**Background:**

So, we are your average middle class American family, except for the fact that my mom has two horses, and our whole life seems to resolve around them. Now, you may say, "But elaboratenoodle! Horses are so expensive — you are very privileged!" However, I can assure you that we are far from wealthy — the horses are our only "splurge," and I don't enjoy or ever ride them. Because of the horses, my mother has disrupted our lives in a bunch of little ways, but the biggest issue was when she moved our whole family to a different county in order to buy a farm, which meant leaving all of my friends behind and moving to an area where the closest grocery store is almost half an hour away, and going to my office (which I only do once a week) takes almost an hour. But, the little things are just as bad — things like selling our beloved pop-up camper to buy a horse trailer. Now, as every pre-teen has inevitably been told, *owning horses is expensive*. And, yeah, it can be. However, the prices goes up significantly when the two perfectionists that are my parents decide to purchase *a farm*, a brand new truck, a tractor, and a horse trailer.

My parents are pretty smart, but all of these things are pretty financially taxing, and I know we're in a lot of debt. Now, don't get me wrong: I still have an amazing life, and my parents really do care about and love me and my siblings. They even helped me to buy my first car, and pay for my insurance. Still, I still am not happy about this horse scenario. Because we are in debt, I feel *really* guilty whenever they spend money on me at all — I've started paying for my own tuition, a lot of my own food, and I will occasionally secretly cover their grocery bills when I go shopping. But, it's taken a toll on our lives: we avoid making necessary repairs to our house and our cars, paying the taxes is always an ordeal, and we can't afford to go on any trips.

Now, I understand that it's their money, and I appreciate everything that they do for me. But now, I'm preparing to go to college, and their income is high enough to prevent me from getting good financial aid, but because they spend it so foolishly, they can't afford to even help me a little, like paying for my books or helping me out with the cost of housing. And I know that I don't deserve any of their money, but I am still not thrilled about the prospect of owing \~$100,000 for college (and no, I am not going to community college; the closest "community" college is farther away than several four-year universities).

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**The Situation:**

So, as you can tell, I am not super thrilled about the horses, and they've been a lot of trouble from my perspective. But, they are really something she enjoys, and a way for her to connect with my sister. Okay, great. But, one challenge is that my sister chose to attend a brick and mortar school, meaning that only myself and my mother are home during the day. Because of this, my mom often tries to guilt me into helping her with the "daily chores," which include obsessively cleaning up after her horses, as well as brushing them, feeding them, and occasionally riding them.

Unfortunately, I am very busy at all times: I have an intense course load (trust me, it's not the type of online school you're thinking of), in addition to a bunch of extracurriculars, as well as my responsibilities as my company's only web developer / IT specialist / technical support representative. I have a crazy life, but I am very lonely and depressed, which isn't great when combined with a huge workload. I am awake and working from about 8:00 AM to 2:00 AM, I have no local friends outside of work (and all of those people are a lot older than me), and the only time I get out of the house is when I go to the office or go skiing with my dad (we got really cheap season passes for which I had to pay most of the price). My mom, however doesn't really have time for this either, as she also works, in addition to having to take care of the house during the day, but I really don't think it's fair for me to expect me to add even more chaos to my life for these stupid animals — chaos that leaves me covered in filth for the rest of my day. I feel guilty for leaving her so much work, but I really do not need more stress in my life right now. AITA?

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TL;DR: My mother has thrown our lives into chaos because of her horses, and I don't want to help take care of them.

Answer:
HISTORICAL


