In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a short summary for this text. The summary must include a situation which caused humor. The summary should be one or two sentences long.
Q: Text: ok, to start off i wanna regard the rule change for august about posting nsfw things, it specifically said bodily discharges which even if this story may be slightly (highly) nsfw, i think it still follows the rules. 

i'm also typing this on mobile in bed right now with some minor pain in my butt so i apologize for any grammar errors, etc...

so, obligatory didn't happen today; it was yesterday. yesterday my mom went out to the store and my dad was on a work trip so i had a lot of time alone. my mom and i were going out to dinner tonight so i wanted to shower too. after finishing up playing some rotmg (shout out to anyone who plays), i head upstairs and start stripping down. i'm already mad hard so i'm going as fast as possible to take my clothes off and hop in the water. i furiously opened the curtain and hopped in.


ok, just to take a step back for a moment, around this time, i recently started experimenting in new ways to masturbate. i mean experimenting - and improvising. i literally tied some rubber bands around my blank the night before and rubbed them up and down until.... stuff happened, you guys get it. so yeah, i was horny as shit and really needed something to do.


so i'm in the shower furiously masturbating and look up for a moment and see shower gel. 


remember improvisation i was talking about, well here it comes.


 i took the shower gel and put it on my left hand, then i shoved my gel covered finger up my butt. no thinking, nothing. just shoved it up my butt. keep in mind, i have never placed any foreign objects up my precious hole. so the finger widened my ass and hurt like shit. i take the finger out and thought that was kind of pleasurable, and i keep rubbing.


in about five seconds, my goddamm asshole feels like a fucking nuclear bomb just dropped in it and exploded into a million pieces and was burning all of my insides alive. i am freaking the fuck out, so i hop out of the shower and quick try to release some turds to cleanse my system. god mother fucking dammit it hurt even more. all while water was dripping down me making a pool on the floor. i paced around the room for what felt like hours until i hopped back in the shower opened my butthole an poured some warm water in it. it stung so bad but it actually soothed my butthole a little bit. i was able to finish my shower, dry off and hop in bed because i needed a fucking rest.


i wake up to my mom coming home and ask her to go to the doctors and i won't say what for. after a bit of arguing, she agrees to take me the next day and thankfully doesn't nag me about it anymore.


when we arrive at the doctors i kick my mom out of the room and come up with a better story to tell my doctor. something along the lines of i was watching a prostate exam video ad wanted to try. as you can tell my fabricated story was a complete fucking fail and was just as embarrassing as what actually happened. so the doctor sends me to another doctor, who runs some tests (opens my butthole an looks at it) by the way, this dude was creepy as fuck and it was so invasive having him examine the inside of my ass. after some groping and caressing, he tells me (and my mom god dammit) i have and anal fissure. he recommends me this stool thing that helps the poop naturally fall out and relax me so won't hurt as much. he also recommend getting desitin which is some creamy soothy ass grace of god shit that you put on with finger condoms and stick up your butt. 

my mom doesn't know exactly what happened but she likes to tease me about it. she imitated me pooping grunting at the toilet because she thinks that's what happened. little does she know...


she's actually half right because the doctor said that's how the fissure probably got there in the first place, i just inflamed it.
A: 
shoved a finger up my butt, suffered the consequences.